Anon in Pone Prison #51: Sorted Pastebin List Edition

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Which story has this in it?

>>30195033
I'm not sure if that actually happened in a green, but I could be wrong.

Also, update coming in about 40 minutes. I'll sweep through it for typos and whatnot then post.

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>>30195130

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>>30195130
Fabulous

>>30156241
>”Anon, please. I know you’re hiding something. Can’t you tell me?”
>Fuck
>What is it with these little ponies and being so endearing?
>You’ve never been guilt-tripped this hard in your whole life
“…Alright, I’ll try and explain. I’ll walk you back to your office while we talk.”
>You start walking, but as you go you notice her starting to lag behind
“What’s the matter?”
>”Oh, I- er- I spent most of the morning running around looking for you. M-My legs are a little tired…”
>You snicker, and Caring gives you a look
>”Don’t laugh! Whose fault do you think this was?”
“Heheheh. Alright, I’m sorry. C’mere.”
>You drop to your knees, holding out your arms
>Her face lights up
>For having weak legs, she practically leaps into your hands
>You rest her on your shoulder, like you would when holding a cat
>Caring giggles happily
>”Ooooo, such a gentlecolt. Alright mister. What are you trying to hide from your primary caregiver?”
>Your smile wanes slightly, and you make sure the pair of you are out of earshot of other inmates before you speak
“Have I ever told you where I’m from?”
>”No! Overseer Badge only told me that you’re a human. Where do you come from?”
“It’s a place called Earth.”
>”Huh… I’ve never heard of it. Where is it?”
>Here we go
“Far from here. Reeeaaaally far. So far that I don’t think you can get there normally.”
>”But then how did you get here?”
“Magic, apparently.”
>You feel her turn about to look at the back of your head
>”…I don’t know if I fully understand where this is going, Anon.”
“I’m not from… whatever this planet is called, Caring. I’m from somewhere very different, and very scary. There’s no magic there.”

>>30195460
>You can’t believe what you’re hearing, so odds are you’re Caring Touch
>Anon’s from another planet?
>You don’t know much about astronomy, but you’re moderately sure they haven’t found another planet with life on it besides this one
>But at the same time…
>He’s talking as if he believes it himself
>Does the Overseer believe this too?
“Well… Uh… This is a lot to take in all of a sudden, Anon.”
>”Yeah. Not surprised. I swear it’s the truth though, Caring. It’s why the princesses are interested in me, and it’s why my blood’s so weird.”
>You guess that all makes sense
>You reach with your hooves, hugging Anon’s head as he carries you
“I don’t care.”
>He laughs gently, and you feel the hand on the back of your neck begin to scratch
>”Heheheh. I’m happy to hear that. Still, is it okay if all your tests don’t work?”
“Hmm. Well… I guess? If you’re an alien, then figuring out how to address any medical issues you might have is more work than I can handle. I can do my best to take care of you if you get sick while you’re here, but it’ll take brighter ponies than me to figure out how to properly care for your somepony of your physiology.”
>”That’s fine. I’d hate to bury you in work.”
>You can’t help but smile
>This is why you like Anonymous
>You can talk to the Overseer about this later
>You think you’ll just enjoyed being carried for now
>You sigh contentedly, leaning your head against his
>The halls seem to fly by in comfortable silence
>Eventually he stops
>”Here we are.”
>Anonymous kneels and sets you down on the floor
>”Get some rest, Caring. I’ll see you in at dinner, okay?
“H-Honestly, I’m a nurse Anon! I know how to take care of myself! But thank you, regardless.”
>And with a smile and a wave, he’s gone
>It took all of your remaining willpower to keep your knees from going weak
>Welp, time for another cold shower and a nap

>>30195466
>You are on your way to snuggle a princess, so you must be Anon
>You’re glad Caring took that so well
>You thought it was going to be a lot weirder than it was
>And you were careful to not put your hands on her back or belly when you picked her up
>You stride through the halls, a path through the inmates filing to their rooms for nap time as you went
>Being notorious has it perks
>You arrive at your room and slip inside quietly, locking the door
>Man, you still can’t get over that you have a lock on this side
>You feel your way over to the bathroom door and open it, flipping on the lights
>It casts just enough light into the bedroom to make out a shape curled up under your blankets, softly rising and falling
>ohboy.jpg
>You take a quick, cold shower to wash off the remaining grime from weights and put on a clean uniform before making your way to the bed
>You lift the blanket to climb in, only to have a pair of dark blue hooves shoot out and ensnare you
>”You have much to learn in the arts of stealth, sweet. Come closer. I have awaited you.”
>You don’t need to be told twice
>Moments later, you are resting comfortably in your cloud bed with Luna snuggled tight against you
>Her eyes are bleary, having been awoken when you entered the room, but she smiles as she speaks
>”How did the day fare for you? I trust all goes well?”
>You gently rake your fingers through her coat as you tell her all about it
“Showed off in front of the weights club today. And the cooking club made some really delicious snickerdoodles.”
>She giggles
>”Your taste in subordinates is most practical. And I should like to have witnessed your spectacle during exercises.”
“If you have training equipment at the castle, I’ll happily replicate it.”
>Luna scoots up until she can nuzzle the side of your face, extending a wing across your body
>”Hee hee. I shall have to make certain they have enough weight…"

>>30195481
>After a time, the darkness and comforting warmth at your side begin to lull you to sleep
>You hear her voice whisper as the world fades out
>”Come, Anon. Let us dream together.”

>About fifteen minutes before lunch ended, you were Brass Badge
>Everything was a blur
>You managed to pin Twitch to the ground while Swing Shift and Close Watch got the other prisoner out
>The endless barrages of slaps and smacks against your face rattled you, but you held on
>Swing Shift came barreling back in, holding down one of the prisoner’s forelegs
>”Overseer, we’re ready to go! Hurry! Let’s get out and lock the door!”
>Easier said than done
>Twitch shouts as he struggles beneath you
>”You can’t hold me down forever! The moment you let up, I’m out of here!”
>How do you do this?
>You can’t let him escape his cell, but you have to stun him long enough to allow you to get out and lock the door
>If you get up, Swing Shift will just have to take your place holding him down
>If he can even restrain him
>Ugh, this is like one of those frustrating logic problems they used to make you do in school
>Think, Brass Badge!
>After a few moments’ hesitation, you know what you have to do
>It’s the only way to make sure no pony else gets hurt
“Swing, head for the door. I’ll be right behind you.”
>He nods, taking only a moment to steady himself before scrambling for the exit
>While he does, you wind up-
>-And bring your hoof crashing down onto Twitch’s snout
>”OW!!”
>The tan hooves cease their assault on your face, retreating to cover their owner’s hurting nose
>Success, but at a cost to your conscience
>You leap up and gallop out the door
>As soon as you’re clear, your three guardsponies heave against it, slamming it into place
>The lock clicks shut, and not a moment too soon
>The sounds of an angry pegasus hammering on the other side fill the hallway

>>30195492
>”I’ll get you for that, Mr. Badge! Just you wait and see if I don’t! It’s mean guards like you that make prisons cary to begin with!
>Close Watch slams the viewport in the door shut and shouts back
>”Put a lid on it, crook! It’s goons like /you/ that make prisons scary!”
>Swing Shift, meanwhile, congratulates you
>”Great work, Overseer! How’d you do that?”
>You stammer out a response
“O-Oh, well, uh, you know. Old Solar Guard trick. Won’t find that anywhere in the prison guard manual.”
>”Cool! Is your face okay? He was really whaling on you.”
>You tentatively prod your cheeks with a hoof, and immediately regret it
>Aw, nuts, they’ve already started to swell…
“Now that you mention it… Let’s head back to the guard room. Can somepony take Mr. Trick-?”
>Your third helper, Searchlight, puts a hoof on your shoulder
>”I’ll make sure he gets back, boss. You gotta go get some ice on your face.”
>You nod wearily
“Alright. Thank you everypony. Let’s go."

All I have for today. Gibe feedback plz b0ss.

>>30195506
Is good as always.

Though, it's spelled "wailing" in that case.

>>30195004
ACTUALLY
Since last thread died, we #50.5, no #51
Also yay for sorted pastebins
But you forgot to post which ones are alive and which are ded ^)

Also I'll be writing tomorrow if I'm still alive.
Got... work today in the afternoon and tomorrow in the morning.
Send help.

>>30195506
WHERE IS THE REST

WHERE IS IT

>>30196558
IT'S IN MY HEAD ANON

CALM DOWN

Have any other writefags posted updates recently?

>>30196695
We're kinda being slow and lazy
Well I have my reasons, job is hell sometimes.
I promise update tomorrow, I swear on Physics Internet

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Bampu. Why did we have to die while I was at work.

>Be the warden.
>This is a greentext story that lacks Anon.
>There's no real conflict.
>Your prisoners are as happy and high morale as they can be.
>When their sentences are served, they are generally reformed and productive members of society.
>And if they aren't, then you see them again within a week or so.
>The guards are all in tiptop shape.
>There's no cross-prison relationships.
>Everything is going smoothly.

>You're kind of bored.

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>>30195492
>>You hear her voice whisper as the world fades out
>>”Come, Anon. Let us dream together.”
This was really endearing and cute, good job.

>>30195506
love your work physics

>>30195749
>>30197648
>>30197912
Thank you for all the feedback. It makes me feel warm and fuzzy and helps me stay motivated.

>>30196734
Wand plz no. What if you break your swear and my Internet stops working?

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>>30196695
Going to dump a cop CYOA every now and then to bring up discussion and make sure thread doesn't die again. I did update my larger story a few times recently, but not frequently.

>You glance down to the piece of paper in your hand.
>The address is barely legible.
>Should have been obvious that Earth ponies are not known for their penmanship.
>Luckily you’re headed to the local police station, so directions are easy enough to get.
>Well, moderately easy if you take into account that most ponies are still terrified of you.
>It takes all afternoon, but you soon find yourself standing outside of the building in question.
>You wonder if you’re even legally required to answer their questions.
>There’s more important stuff to worry about right now.
>Before today, you were a humble baker in a “less than safe” neighborhood.
>Of course it was a bunch of horseshit.
>It was nicer than anyplace you ever lived back on Earth.
>And mommy and daddy didn’t raise you in any kind of slum.
>A million other things you -should- be doing crosses your mind.
>As of now, you’re out of a home and you’re in dire need of cash.
>If the growling in your stomach is any indication, you’re also very hungry.
>You’re half tempted to start a life of crime if it can get food in your stomach.
>”Hello?” Someone says, pulling you out of your thoughts.
>You look down at a light pink colored unicorn mare who is sporting a red-orange mane.

>>30198605
>She seems to be wearing some detective garb.
”Uhh...”
>Her face is hard to read as she looks you over, bright green eyes studying your features.
>Letting out a soft knicker, something you’ve seen ponies do to children-
>Err... fillies, colts or mindless animals, she continues.
>”Is there some reason you’re standing out here big guy? Are you lost?”
>You don’t know whether you should feel insulted or not.
>Though, if you didn’t know these ponies were sapient, you’d have done something similar.
”Yeah, I’m here to give a witness statement to hmm…”
>You glance down at the paper and try to decipher the name of the pony from the myriad of scribbles.
>It could be a ‘G’ though it could also be a ‘S.’
>Your voice seems to take several seconds to register to the mare.
>When it does, her eyes widen at you.
>She’s probably in shock knowing that you’re capable of speech.
>”Wow, that’s. You’re-” She bites her tongue and blushes a bit in embarrassment. “I’m so sorry. Please, follow me.”
>As you step inside, several ponies shoot you nervous glances.
>The unicorn seems to be oblivious as she looks to the ground, mumbling something to herself.
>Once you’re in a barren hallway, save for you and the detective, she looks up at you.

>>30198607
>”Those ponies were staring an awful much, weren’t they?”
“… Yeah?”
>She gives you a warm smile and stops.
>”This is the interrogation room. Make yourself comfortable while I go get the Chief for you.”
”But, I’m-”
>”You’re not in trouble, don’t worry. You look famished though, I’ll send somepony to get you something to eat okay?”
>This mare is more perceptive than you initially thought.
“Sure.”
>She leaves you with a curt nod and smile as you enter the room.
>It’s... not unlike a preschool classroom.
>There’s a small table with building blocks on the side, some crayons strewn about, and beanbags in the middle of the floor.
>A stark contrast from the frigid empty looking interrogation rooms you saw on T.V. when you were on Earth.
>You feel someone bump into your leg.
>Looking down, you see a familiar light brown pegasus mare grinning up at you.
>She puts a large paper bag down on the floor.
>”Anon! How’re ya doin, pal?”
”Hazy? You work here?”
>You give your favorite customer a light pat on her head.

>>30198612
>”This is the only ponice station in the city, Anon.”
>...Ponice
>You thought that was some kind of mistake on the address.
>”Here, I got you some donuts.” She grins, pushing the paper bag closer to your feet. ”They’re not as good as the ones you make though.”
>You lean down and pick up the bag, eying it hungrily.
”Is this okay?”
>”Detective Keen told me there was a hungry witness in here. I never thought it’d be you."
>She cocks her head and ruffles her feathers.
>"Then again, I guess it makes sense.”
>You stare blankly at her, unable to reply, what with the glazed donut jammed in your mouth.
>”Anon. You’re all over the headlines as a big scary hairless alien that took several pillows, silly string, -and- rubber bands to the face from hardened criminals to defend your bakery’s sweets.”
>You nearly choke.
”I’m what? That’s ridiculous. It was annoying if anything. And, it was no excuse for my boss to just up and leave without warning so that I’d be jobless and on the streets.”
>You nearly yell out that last part, leaving your friend quaking in her uniform.
>She doesn’t know you well, and with headlines like that it's no wonder she's tense.
>”Sorry, Hazy. I guess I just needed to vent.”
>She seems to visibly relax at your apology. ”Look, Anon. If you still need a place to stay, I’ll write down my addr-.”
“Wait!” You shout, causing her to jump. “I mean… I’ll write it.”

>>30198618
>She pulls out a blue crayon and notebook out of her pocket and dictates her address.
>When you’re done you pocket it, and as of on cue another mare walks in, eying you and Hazy curiously as you tear a page out of Hazy’s notebook.
>”Ohh, the chief’s here. Later, Anon. I just need to finish up some paperwork." She snatches the notebook and crayon from you with a wing. "Which I was totally doing and not putting off.” she chuckles and shoots you an apologetic look before rushing out of the room.
>”You two know each other?” The other mare finally speaks.
>”Yes, ma’am.”
>She hums to herself before sitting on the beanbag opposite of you, pulling out her own notebook and crayon.
>”Not from her old trouble making days, I hope.”
>There’s a bit of a southern drawl to her accent but she’s hiding it pretty well.
>”Trouble? Hazy? Are we thinking of the same mare?” you crack a smile for the first time today.
>She looks at you with a raised brow, unamused.
“I mean…” You drop your smile back to the frown you’ve had all day. It’s growing on you.
“She comes- She used to come by every morning for donuts and small talk.”
>She sighs in what seems to be relief.
>Picking up the crayon in her mouth, she nods at you.
>Your brow furrows in confusion for a bit, then you remember why she asked you to come here.
“Ohh. Yes. Umm... From the start?”
>”Frm the shtart.”
”I was in the back, kneading some dough, then I heard a big slam out front. I shrugged it off and continued. Figured it might’ve been the wind or something.”

>>30198622
”I heard some yelling followed some crying coming from my boss, so without thinking I grab my favorite rolling pin and rush out front to see what’s going on.”
>You grimace as you try and recall the finer details.
”There were seven stallions? They’re wearing ski-masks and stockings over their heads, and, no kidding, they had rubber bands, pillows and, at the time I didn’t know what those cans were, but I quickly found out it was silly string.”
>...

>>Continue 100% truthfully- you instigated physical conflict when they threw one of your pies on the ground and insulted your boss’s establishment.
>>Lie and say they attacked you or your boss first- when you didn’t comply with something.
>>Tell her you’re not comfortable with continuing.
>>Write-in

>>30195506
Good shit, as per usual, keep it up!
>>30198629
Neat

>>30198629
Veryyyyy guud

>>30198629

>>continue with the truth senpai! And then make sure to tell the chief that they surely must appreciate the honesty

>>30198084
:^)

Bad news, I lost my documents due to a shitty flashdrive when I switched OS's. But I'll do my best to continue today.

>>30198629

I'd say stretch the truth a little bit.

>Be Anon, with smug, pink mare giving you a look that says “Well, you heard him.”
>You’re no virgin, but you’re no horsefucker either.
>You don’t even know how horse genitals work.
>Most of all, you’re afraid of smelly, gross poopholes. After all, how do they reach back there?
>”What’s the matter, Anon? Cat got your tongue?”
>”Are there cats in Equestria?”
>She’s mad. “What kind of question is that? I’m giving you an invitation to mate!”
>Wow, she’s bold.
>”First of all, how do I know that you won’t kill me if I were even to consider it?”
>She rolls her eyes, and goes back to sipping her tea to ignore me.
>Man, you’re really hitting it off with your new cellmate.
>”Why don’t you go get me some more tea? I could do without your presence right now.” She says with obvious irritation.
>”Err, explain how I’m supposed to “go get tea” when I’m locked in here. How’d you get that tea set in the first place?”
>”You hughmans must be really dumb. Just walk out, go down the hall to your left, and into the kitchen.”
>She won’t even look at you.
>”What the hell? This is a prison, isn’t it?”
>She speaks slowly and rudely, like she believes you’re stupid.
>“Yes. We are in a prison called Tartarus. On the outskirts of the Everfree forest.”
>You’re getting impatient. “What kind of prison lets its prisoners walk around freely in the corridors?”
>”What kind of prison doesn’t?”
>She now looks at you confused and pitifully.
>You’re beginning to hate this Suck-ubus.

>>30199880
>”So… I can just walk into the kitchen for tea?”
>”YES. JUST GET ME SOME GRASS TEA.”
>You scuttle toward the door with that. You know not to piss off a woman. Or a horse-woman apparently.
>You pull the stone handle on the creaky door.
>And walk out into the dim hallway, and see doors along the tunnel and various luminescent crystals gently lighting the path in different colors.
>You noticed the guard standing by the door, he stands like a statue. He couldn’t have not noticed you.
>You ask nervously anyway. “Where is the kitchen? Lovestruck asked me to get her tea.”
>In a surprisingly polite manner, he tells you to head left to the third door on the right.
>You thank him with a smile, and he noticeably shudders a bit as he says “no problem”.
>Following his directions, you head through the cell door into the kitchen, which appears to be of similar dimensions to your cell.
>But it contains a fancy kitchenette, with green marble countertops, and cafe tables on the other side…
>...Which contain all manner of strange creatures like something out of a surreal painting.
>”Outta the way, please.” a dark husky voice rattles you from behind.
>You forward and out of the doorway, and see the large, horned creature that’s twice your size behind you.
>”Whoa, you’re ugly. What are you?”
>You dispel the urge to retort with “How about you look at yourself in the mirror, tough guy.” on account that he’s a minotaur who looks like he could pull your head off your shoulders.
>You instead reply with “I’m a human. Aren’t there other humans in Equestria?”
>”Not that I know of. You’ll fit right in, buddy.”
>You’re not sure what to make of his last statement, so you just head over to the fine kitchen on the left side of the room.

>>30199886
>Theres an island in front of the kitchen with round seats like a little diner, one small, blue minotaur sits at the edge where you enter the kitchen.
>You pay him no mind as you walk in, and see the black and white tile floor below.
>This is too nice for a prison, you can’t help but think to yourself.
>Another strange creature is stirring a pot of what smells of delicious soup. He appears to be an amalgamation of 5 or 6 different creatures.
>You’re scared what kind of thing it is.
>”You’ve been staring at me for about a minute now. Am I /that/ amazing?” She says with a smirk on his goat face?
>He’s wearing a chef hat over some horns, but they stick out pretty obviously.
>”Heeellloooo~? Anybody in there?”
>He’s already in front of you, and pushing the flesh of your cheeks together.
>”Oy, hands off.” You tell him as you step back and move his claw and paw.
>”Sorrry! Name’s Discord by the way~. I figure your brain might have fell in your stomach for a moment.”

>>30199892
>This creature is particularly odd.
>”My name is Anon. What are you exactly?”
>You regret your query.
>”OOOH the human is interested in me! I’m a dragonequus, and god of chaos, nice to meet you, friend!”
>A god of chaos? Really? He appears to you to be quite harmless and mortal.
>But something he said struck you as odd.
>”Wait, you know what I am?”
>”Of course I know what you are! You silly humans and your bold destruction of nature. I’m really quite proud, you know.”
>”Hey, what’s that supposed to mean? I care about the environment!” He’s getting under your skin at this point.
>”Ugh, you’re one of those ‘Hippies’ are you? Gag! Those weirdos don’t have any idea about the joys of chaos.”
>”I’m /not/ a hippie.”
>”Now now, don’t get upset. So what are you then?”
>”I’m a boxer. I fistfight in a ring for people’s entertainment.”
>He snickers. “Now isn’t that interesting? Humans sure are captivated by violence.”
>You have a feeling you’re not going to get along with this guy, either.

>>30198629
>>>Continue 100% truthfully- you instigated physical conflict when they threw one of your pies on the ground and insulted your boss’s establishment.

How's today's story bit? This story is fun for me, I'm glad I was able to retrieve the rest from the previous thread. Fuck Windows, I'm glad I changed to Linux.

>>30199917
i am enjoying it, and i would like for you to continue

>>30199923
Thanks, I'll post some more tomorrow. Look forward to it.

>>30195130
I'm pretty sure the only green that had something similar was Anon smacking her with an emergency churro.

>>30198618
>”Sorry, Hazy. I guess I just needed to vent.”
The only typo I could spot. This is one of Anon's lines, so it it shouldn't be green. Otherwise it's great, R.

>>30198629
Tell the truth! Being mean to meanies doesn't count, everyone knows that.

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This is the Prison Map for Tartarus. Sorry, I'm no visual artist. I'll reveal more about the map as the story continues.

What would be your weapon of choice in pone prison? Actual weapons not applicable because this isn't that kind of thread you faggot. Churros, like Cookies uses? The pillow from your bunk? Silly string?

>>30201028
Wet willies.

>>30200449
Aye, thanks mateo. I fixed this and a few other typos. I'll make a story pastebin and character sheet for Anon in a sec.

>>30201028
Swirly. I will be the reason they wet their beds in the night because they're too scared of the bathroom when the sun's down.

Some people just want to watch the world flush.

Why did Anon Goes to Prison on fimfiction go password-protected?

>>30200625
I shall eagerly await moar green

>>30201265
Wut!?

>>30201265
As far as my knowledge goes, that story sprang up a few months after these threads started but he never posted it here. We wouldn't have any knowledge about that. Though I never read the story for myself so I wouldn't know for sure.

>>30201265
Fimfiction prison story went like this
>Anon lurks prison pone
>Likes the idea
>Instead of writing greentext, goes to Fimfiction and writes story there
>Instantly famous
>Writer is probably a duck

The thread goes /bump/ in the night.

>>30201028
Gangs sorround inmates they don't like when they are in the bathroom and smack him with wet towels until he cries

>>30204305
>Tfw when your cell mate warns other prison mates are going to wack you after P.E.

>>30204121
This

Page 10 bump

>>30204305
:(

>>30204305
>>30204426
Jesus Christ how horrifying.

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>>30195004

>>30199897
>You nearly forgot what you came in here for.
>”Well, Mr. Insult-the-Human-Race, I need to make some “grass tea”. It’s for my succubus roommate.”
>”Oh, I know exactly what you need. Let me get it for you.”
>To your surprise he opens high cabinets with a snap of a finger, and a ceramic yellow jar levitates out of the cabinet.
>Circular, leafy flowers come out of the jar and land inside a prepared teapot.
>He then retrieves parts of a dull clay tea set and puts it together on a tray.
>”I’ll ready up some water, lickity-split!” He says as he fills up a kettle, then puts the tip of the claw in.
>To your amazement, it already boils, and he pours it into the tea pot, and the aroma already wafts about.
>It smells great, but it makes you feel funny too.
>He levitates the complete tray into your open hands.
>”Get her to bring back the other tray, would you? It’s rather /tedious/ getting her to bring it back.”
>You nod and be on your way, since you’d like to avoid talking with him any longer.
>”Yoo-hoo! One last thing!” He calls out before you walk away.
>He teleports by your ear and whispers…
>”I heard you uttered profanity in front of the princess, I would have rather enjoyed that spectacle~” He chuckles with amusement.
>You groan without even looking at him and walk away.
>”Oh, don’t be that way! I just want to be friends is all.” You hear him say as you make your way out the door.

>>30207253
>You find yourself back in your room in front of a… peeved succubus.
>You sit down next to her after placing the tea set.
>And you feel bad because you recall the earlier conversation, and how big of a dick you must have seemed like.
”I’m sorry, Lovestruck. I should have been more receptive and turned you down in a polite and comforting way.”
>She looks into your eyes with a smile.
>”Aww, I forgive you. You’re nicer than I took you for, I’m sorry Anon.”
>She hugs you to your surprise, and you put your arms around her earnestly.
>You become aware of the dizziness this tea is giving you as soon as the two of you part.
”What’s in this tea, anyway? It’s making me a little dizzy and relaxed.”
>She picks up the tea with her hooves, and pours it in the two small cups on the tray.
>It fascinates you for a moment. How do hooves work?
>”This tea is made from a plant called cannabis. Really great stuff! Here have some.”
>She pushes the cup in front of you and you take it.
”Cannabis? Wow, I didn’t know they had this in Equestria.”
>You take a sip of the tea. It tastes fruity and delicious.
“Wait, were you drinking this earlier, Lovestruck?”
>”Yeah, why do you ask?”
“Well, you don’t seem intoxicated in the least.”
>”Why would I be intoxicated?”
“Well, humans get relaxed, giggly, and euphoric when then smoke it. Or drink it. Does it not effect you horses?”
>”I’m not a horse, I’m a pony. Horses live in Saddle Arabia.”
“Oh, to be honest, I know nothing about your people. How about you tell me as we finish this tea? By the time you’re done, I’ll be pretty high.”
>”What is ‘High’? Well, I guess I’ll start with the races of ponykind.”
>She tells you about all kinds of creatures you’d find here, and the way the world works.
>You’re find yourself rather impressed as time goes by, and you begin saying “Wow” and “Whoa” a lot.
>This cannabis tea must be really potent.

>>30207259
Should have been doing this earlier. I've got more for today, be on the lookout for some 420-ventures.

>>30207267
And I will eagerly await

>>30207259
Rip. Anon's probably going to get in trouble for whatever other narcotic affect pones.

Bampu.

As I promised, I'll deliver tonight. Page 9 bump.

>>30207259
“Pffft! So you’re telling me that a pony ‘raises’ the sun? That’s hilarious! Hahahaha!”
>”Um…Anon, that’s how it works. How else is the sun supposed to rise?”
”Gravity pulls planets around the sun. It’s like… you know… a big ball of hydrogen or something.”
>”Anon, is this what it means to be high? You’re pretty incoherent.”
“I’m plenty coherent.. But I am tired... where am I supposed to crash?”
>”There’s a hay bed over there, but there’s only one. I’ll go get another one.”
>You somehow remember what discord told you in your foggy mind.
>”Discord told me to tell you to get… kettle….”
>And you’re out like a light.

>>30210707
>You’re the pink pony with an awful name.
>Anon just passed out on the table before you could even get out of your stool.
>He muttered something about a kettle.
>Oh! You forgot to bring back the tea set, you were so interested in talking with the human.
>You carefully take the tray with your strong, prehensile tail.
>And make your way to the cafeteria.
>……….
>You arrive at the empty room, but see a familiar dragonequus wiping off tables at the far end of the room.
>You set down the tea tray on the island and walk to the only other creature here, who is manipulating multiple towels with magic.
>He obviously knows you here.
>”Well~ isn’t this a pleasant surprise. You almost never bring back the dishes yourself. What’s the occasion?”
>This smooth talker always manages to make you smile. And you appreciate your friendship with him.
“No occasion really. Anon passed out before he could do the chore for me.”
>”Ah, that human. I got a kick out of teasing him a little. Would you mind giving this to him for me?”
“Sure, what are these?”
>He levitates them onto your back for easy access.
>”They’re clothes for the human. Surely you didn’t want everyone in Equestria to see his penis unabashedly swinging about?”
>You laugh at his crude joke.

>>30210721
”How did you make these anyway?”
>”I just took an old uniform and transformed with my magic. This place might inhibit me severely, but I can at least do this much.”
“Thanks Discord. You’re very appreciated here.”
>”Thank you, dear Lovestruck. I don’t think I could have done it without you.”
>You smile at his sweet gesture.
“I should get back to Anon. Where are the haybeds again?”
>”They’re the last door on the right to the great chamber. I appreciate our little talks.”
“Me too. Let’s go for tea again after kitchen hours.”
>”Alright then! Tata~”
>You leave the room behind and hastily make your way to the storage room at the end of the hall.
>You can’t imagine a wood table makes a comfortable pillow.

>>30210731
>You’re Anon, and you woke up shortly after you passed out.
>The room is empty, and one half of your face is painfully red, and you drooled a bit.
>You get up and wipe the drool from your face, you still feel a bit sluggish from the high.
>Just as you dust off your bare ass, and Ebola comes with a large bale of hay with her tail.
“Whoa, that tail looks pretty strong.”
>”It is. I bet I can pin you down with it.” She smirks.
>You’re too tired to retort, however.
”What’s that on your back?”
>She sets down the hay, presses it, and spreads it out so you can sleep on it.
>”Oh! Discord made you these clothes!”
>She walks over to you and grabs them with her teeth, and handing them to you.
>You unfold them and look, it’s perfectly your size!
>It’s a black and white striped prison uniform.
>Nobody here wears uniforms, so this design must be some kind of joke.
>But Discord took the time to make it for you, so you’ll have to thank him for it.
“I’m surprised he’d do this for me, I brushed him off earlier.”
>”You did? Aww, but he’s really nice you know. He just like to tease everypony. He means no harm.”
“For a god of chaos, he seemed to be strangely benevolent.”
>”Once upon a time, he actually terrorized Equestria. But when the Two Sisters stopped him, they sent him here.”
>”He was a big meanie, even when we met. But I knew that he had some good character. He just needed a push in the right direction is all.”
>You’re really impressed by her.
“Wow, you confronted a big, bad god of chaos, and befriended them? That takes some balls. I like that.”
>”Takes some balls? You humans have some weird expressions.”

I held out as long as I could. I didn't even expect I could write this much before I bed. I may or may not have more tomorrow.

At the very least, I'll try to get my Pastebin up and running. Good night, friends.

>>30210757
good nighto friendo

G'nite bump.

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>>30198629

>>Continue 100% truthfully- you instigated physical conflict when they threw one of your pies on the ground and insulted your boss’s establishment.


“They ordered me to get a bag and start shoveling some cookies in it, or else. I told them to leave firmly but they laughed. One of them took a bite out of one of the fresher pies, then threw it down on the floor. Another one called the shop ‘stupid with bad bakers.’”
>You stop and look up to the mare.
>She seems to be rushing to get this all down.
>An impressive feat considering she’s using her mouth.
”Should I slow down?”
>She scrunches her snozzle and shakes her head.
>Despite that, you take another bite out of your donut and give her a few seconds to catch up.
>Should you even be telling her that you instigated physical contact?
>On Earth, touching someone first before violence escalates can make you liable for a lot of shit.
>Or all of it.
>It’s safe to assume it’s similar in Horseland.
>Although, it’s not like anyone died.
>...Or even injured for that matter.
”They interrupted my work, insulted me, insulted my boss’ establishment, and wasted a perfectly good blueberry pie. I… snapped. Walked right over to the biggest one that was barking orders and clonked him on the head with my rolling pin to show them I was being serious.”
>The mare gasps, dropping her crayon.
>You lean down and hand it back to the mare, who cautiously takes it back.
”I mean, if this was some kind of prank it was in very bad taste. I swear I didn’t hit him that hard, he collapsed anyways though. Maybe out of shock? Then they pelted me with pillows, shot me with rubber bands, and silly string.
>You point at your left eye.

>>30211417
>”One of the bands nearly hit my eye.”
>She dry heaves a tiny bit.
“Are you okay?”
>She winces, but gestures for you to go on.
“Okay… where was I. Ahh! There was a shrill scream from my boss as this happened. When they realized all it was doing was making me more angry, they looked nearly ready to piss themselves and ran outside to get the pol- ponice to turn themselves in.”
>She’s stopped writing and stares at you intently.
“After that, you know the rest. Cops came in and you gave me the address to the station. Then insisted I go with the paramedics to check for any injuries.
>Still staring.
>”I told them I was fine and to let me go, but they ended up making me stay overnight. “I don’t tell you how to bake your muffins,” they said.”
>She hasn’t blinked.
“Uhh… That’s it.” You awkwardly cough in your hand.
>She narrows her eyes at you, before returning to her task of writing.
>You dread to think of how her hand- mouth writing looks.
>Sitting patiently, you wait for her to finish.
>”Mister Anonymous.” she finally speaks, gently putting the crayon back down. “I appreciate you told me the truth, as hard as that must have been. But you could have handled that a lot better. What you did wasn’t right.”
>Crap, you should have stretched the truth a bit.
>”...But I can write it off. They were threatening you with unlicensed weapons and you were under pressure. That being said, you could have- should have gotten very hurt as well. I have no idea how you’re out of the clinic. Not to mention, you put your boss in danger too.” She gives you a stern hard look.
>Your throat feels awfully dry.

>>30211426
>Ohh, there’s a powdered donut in your mouth.
>“Please be more careful in the future, Mister Anonymous.”
>You finish off the donut.
>She’s not wrong.
>What if they had actual concealed weapons? You’d be six under right now.
>You should know better than to charge in blindly with a rolling pin out of all things.
”You’re right. I’m sorry.”
>There’s another awkward pause as she looks at you, she’s obviously mulling over of something.
“...Considering there’s almost no crime here in ponyland, I’m not sure there’s going to be next time.”
>”That’s because we’re doing our job right, Mister Anonymous. But I wouldn’t be so sure.”
“Ma’am?”
>”I’m handling your case, Anon. I know your boss skipped town. I want to offer you a job.”
>You stare at her like she came in with no pants on.
>Ohh, right. She didn’t.
>Your parents always told you to stay away from jobs like that.
>”Our only real hard hitter in the force is getting up there in age and we need somepony to replace him. I see potential in you, Mister Anonymous.”
”With all do respect, ma’am. I don’t think I’m cut out for something like this. I’m just a baker.”
>”You never know you’ll like something unless you try, Mister anonymous. You don’t have to answer right away. Think on it.”

>>30211433
>You nod.
>”... of course, you’d get paid 10 bits an hour-”
>That’s four more bits than your old job, but it’s more dangerous isn’t it?
>”Get to work outside-”
>You liked working in the dark away from ponies who are spooked all the time.
>”And, you get free coffee and donuts.”
”Deal.”
>Shit.
>Stomach, no.
>Getting groceries or making deals isn’t smart when you’re empty.
“Umm. To try it out, I mean.”
>”Thank you, Mister Anonymous. Consider yourself part of the force.”
>Just like that?
>Shouldn’t you be getting training or something?
>Paperwork?
>Background check?
>On second thought, technically you’re an illegal alien and shouldn’t bring that up.
>Ever.

>>30211417
top fucking kek that pic

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>>30211439
>The best thing to do right now is smile and nod.
>”Given how you handled this incident. I’ll have to assign you somepony trustworthy and skilled to partner up with. At least for your first few shifts."
>She clops her hooves together. "Luckily I have the perfect pony in mind.”
”Keeping me on a short leash, Chief?” You crack another small grin.
>”I’m sorry, Mister Anonymous, but I can’t risk you getting yourself and civilians into danger like you did at the bakery while carrying the MPD badge. You understand, right?” she says, returning the smile it this time.


>>Accept.
>>Write-in, She wants you on the force. Maybe you can use it as leverage for an alternative.

ha. Captcha was freeze Fitting.
https://pastebin.com/4i1pJzxL Bin
Anon's Character sheet.
https://pastebin.com/yBryqVvE

>>30211465
>>>Accept.

>>30211465
>>>Accept.
why not

>>30211433
Should be "all due respect" here. Otherwise, flawless.

>>30211465
Accept on condition that we get to work with Hazy!

Page 8 bump.

>>30211337
G'morning bump

>>30212983

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page 8 cookie bump

I got banned for some bullshit from 4chan system, but I'm back.
Expect an update tomorrow morning.

whoa nelly

>>30213916
Good. Not physics can have his internet back.

Here's the pastebin. Include in the next thread?

https://pastebin.com/u/Suturoganofu

>>30211465
>>>Write-in
just because no one else is saying it

>>30215170
We'll make sure we do! I swear on Physics Internet! Again!

>>30215558
WAND NO

Also, will have a nice little update tonight.

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>>30215903
Can't wait

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>>30215903
Awesome. You're my inspiration Phys, I wanted to let you know that. :3

>Page 8

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>>30216367
O-Oh

>>30195506
>The guard room is pretty quiet when you get there, thankfully
>Close Watch sits with you on one of the sofas until Swing Shift returns with an icepack for your face
>There’s no need to take up space in the infirmary over something like this, but only the nurse has medical supplies
>”How do you feel, sir? Sure you don’t want to see the nurse?”
>You take the icepack from Swing, pressing it against your swollen cheek
>Ahhhhhh, sweet relief
“Much better now, and no. There’s not much a nurse can do for bruising that hasn’t broken the skin.”
>Close Watch shudders
>”Have you ever gotten bruised that bad, sir? Broken skin?”
>You nod
“Mhm. Plenty of opportunities for it in the Solar Guard. But it’s not so bad. They make magic-enhanced bandaids these days, cools the wound as soon as they’re applied. Really impressive stuff.”
>You lean back in the sofa, chatting with your coworkers
>You were kinda-sorta in charge, sure, but this wasn’t like your old job where you had to stand on ceremony at all times
>You had a fancy job title courtesy of Warden’s insistence, but no real authority
>The other guards looked to you for advice and direction, but you’d never make them salute you if they didn’t want to
>Doing that would make you like those stuffed-shirt commissioned officers
>Blech!
>Before you know it, you can hear the bell ringing
>A glance at the clock tells you that lunch must be ending
>Dang, you’d have to sneak some food from the kitchens later
>…or get a bunch of pudding using your vast abundance of vouchers
>Guards start to file into the room
>With each new arrival, a new shocked exclamation at the state of your face, and a new opportunity for Swing Shift and Close Watch to tell the story again
>A little while later, Cookies comes in
>”Hey guys, is- Boss! What happened to your face?!”
>You see Swing getting ready to launch into the story again and you hold up a hoof

>>30217194
“Got into it with Twitch while I was checking on him. On the bright side, there’s no way he’s getting out anytime soon. How was hanging out wi- uh, chaperoning Anon, Guardsmare Cream?”
>Her face lights up
>”Oh, it was fun! He taught me another cool thing! I wanted to show everypony! I need an apple though.”
>You cock an eyebrow
>An apple?
>One of the others has one he saved from lunch, and she takes it in her hooves
>With a look of deep concentration, she holds it tightly
>Suddenly the apple splits perfectly in half, and there’s a cry of surprise from everyone present
>Celestia’s flowing mane, you can hardly comprehend it yourself!
>How did she get so strong?
>You only left her with Anon for an hour and a half, and suddenly she can rip apples apart?!
>Close Watch puts voice to your disbelief
>”How did you do that?!”
>Cookies puffs out her chest in pride
>”It’s easy! There’s just a little trick to it…”

>You’re dreaming of floating in space with an adoring moon princess, so you’re Anon
>This time, you orbit the planet of the small horses as Luna points out constellations she’s made from where she’s snuggled up into your chest
>She’s able to manifest herself this time, since she was awake to begin dreamwalking just as you fell asleep
>”And that one, I made in honor of the first minotaur ambassador to Equestria! He was an amicable fellow. A bit overenthusiastic about the oddest things, but that just meant there was never a dull moment.”
>You smile as the stars seem to shine a little brighter under her watchful eye
>White rays of light even shoot out to connect the them, forming a picture of a minotaur
“It’s really pretty, Luna. Do you cause the stars to form, or do you arrange them?”
>She titters at that
>”Would that I were so mighty. No, I merely arrange them. If I had powers comparable to yours, I would make a star for you right now!”

>>30217200
>You feel a mix of regret that your life with her will essentially always be based on a lie, and the warm, giddy feeling that comes with liking someone who likes you back
“My powers are nothing to boast about.”
>She turns to face you, pressing her nose against yours as she smiles
>”Oh? I do not believe so.”
>You smile, squeezing her tightly as you speak in mock-admonishment
“And what does a silly pony princess know of the powers of the humans?”
>She squeals, pretending to struggle
>”Ahhhh~! Only what I have experienced in your arms, made clear by the testimony of a draconequus.”
>…what?
>She continues
>”Discord told me that you hold power over sensory perception, able to make lesser beings feel whatever you choose. Having been able to experience your lovely appendages myself, I had little choice but to believe.”
>…Wow, that’s actually a pretty good cover story
>You could totally pull that off!
>With a surge of confidence, you bury your face in her neck, running your fingers up her spine
“Heheheheh. Well, he isn’t wrong. But I could hardly call you a lesser being.”
>Luna shivers and moans softly, and you feel her bury her nose in your hair
>”Mmmmm…”
>You keep teasing her, dragging your fingers through her coat up and down her body
>She’s actually pretty toned
>You can feel the muscles in her back and around her wings tense as your fingers pass over them
“You seem a little tense, Luna.”
>”F-Forgive me- ah- I lack the poise- ooooo, yes! Right theeeeeerrrreeeaahhhh…”
>She squeaks as you find a particularly sensitive spot
>You pull away from her neck, giving her a little kiss
>Her breath hitches as she freezes momentarily, only to press against your lips with fervor
>That’s it
>You are going to make her melt
>Slowly, you break the kiss, eliciting a whine
“Here. Let me help you relax, little moon.”

>>30217204
>Her face flushes at your pet name, and she moans as you begin pressing your fingertips into her back, rubbing in strong, slow circles
>Little by little, you cover the length and breadth of her, and she slowly dissolves into a puddle of pleased princess in your arms, perfectly relaxed
>She nuzzles your neck weakly as she tries to respond
>”Ah… I… dearest Anon, that… I’ve never… Ohh…”
>You just smile, wrapping one arm tightly around her while the other begins slowly scratching behind her ears
“No time for one of the supreme rulers of Equestria to get a massage?”
>”Such things are… frivolous. Too much to be done, too many ponies depending on us… And there is always such a hubbub when sister and I leave the castle. Always ponies following, watching… I abide it, but do not enjoy it.”
“Hm. I guess I’ll only be able to spoil you when we’re alone.”
>She wraps her forelegs around your upper body, murmuring into your neck
>”…I never said that."
>You chuckle, running your fingers through her long hair
>Or mane, you guess it would be
>Time passes in happy silence and you watch the constellations and galaxies pass by
>Luna’s hypnotic mane and tail blend into the void around you, and stars seem to flow outward from them
>”…for you.”
“Huh?”
>”I-I wish to make a constellation for you.”
>Awwwww
“I’d love that!”
>She giggles happily, rolling over so her back rests against your chest
>You feel her take hold of the both of you, and you cease orbiting the planet, instead moving swiftly to hover hundreds of miles above its north pole
>Luna surveys the stars all around you, slowly rotating
>”Hmmm… Ah, there is a lovely spot. You will be visible on most nights if I put you there!”
“Will moving stars here move them in the real world?”
>”Ah, no. I wish to create it with you! I will make it reality when we awake."
>Your heart melts

>>30217207
>She spends a good while picking out choice stars for you, those that have yet to be built into any constellation
>”Now how shall we portray you, my sweet?”
>You squeeze one of her hooves as you ponder that
>You think about all the constellations she showed you earlier
>All were resplendent, especially to a pair of eyes that had never seen them before
>Still, maybe you could bring a bit of Milky Way beauty to the table
“Can you arrange those three in a line?”
>”Certainly!”
>Under your direction, Luna guides the stars into place, forming a sort of Orion knockoff
>Luna giggles at the flexing arms you have her draw, reaching to squeeze one of your biceps
>Your star artist is swift in her work, and a shining image of you adorns the night sky in what feels like minutes
>The moon princess rolls back over, keeping one eye on her latest creation as she gives you a peck on the cheek
>”Mmmm. Very dashing. It shall make an excellent addition.”
>You return her little kiss, happy as can be.

And that's all for tonight. Point out errors and give feedback, m80s.

>>30217209
Luna's pulling out all the stops. If/when she and her sister find out Anon isn't some kind of god he's beyond fucked. Not good fucked. Like, through Tartarus and into Tireks old herniated asshole fucked.

Great update though.

>>30217209
god I love this story
I want to work on a story for this thread so much, but my work keeps me horrifically busy
but your story is the warm light at the end of my day

>>30217866
Go for it anyways. Even a small update once a week'll be nice.

>>30217209
I'm really enjoying it, these scenes have such feeling and impact. Looking forward to your next update!

>Page 9
I can fix it!

To timeout with you, page 9!

>>30219395
I can still fix it!

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>>30217209
She's adorable. Adorable little moon princess.

>>30220648
no I can!

have we ever done a prisoner of war story? I want to see anon in an adorable POW camp

>>30221614
>There's a pillow war in Saddle Arabia
>The Equestrian Guard is sent to its ally
>Anon finds himself in Hoofganistan for some reason
>A surprise attack with pillows beats him unconscious
>He'll never live this down.

>>30221614
That's a fun idea.

>>30221614
I'd surrender out of fear of brutally hurting one of them.

>>30221614
>>30222018
>>30222036
1/?

>2 years, that's how long you've been stuck as a slave for these barbaric pony horse hybrid abominations
>2 long, grueling years of trying to survive and keep your testicles from being next on the chopping block
>Since then you've watched these mostly female Islamic-ish cow and horse things beat smaller male pony slaves with pillowcases, pouring sand in their eyes and mouths, and in the cases of runaways, gelding them.
>But you're not stupid, and you didn't survive a human war without a good deal of cunning.
>So you did the best you could at making yourself useful.
>Your canines, meat eating ways, fighting skills and overall passive aggressiveness with your captors has kept you from being gelded or made into a sex slave, and instead you were placed into some kind of slave battalion.
>Putting all your skills to use, you fought for these disgusting cows and horses.
>You fought day and night against other cows and horses in this arid desert with all the ferocity of a cornered animal, trying to survive.
>You're not exactly proud of most of the things you've had to do since you were teleported here.
>In those 2 years you still can't speak the language, but you know enough of these creatures body language to know that whatever war they are fighting, they are losing.
>Now you're on the way to another battlefield, in a cart full of other slaves.
>Your pillowcase full of rocks clutched in your hands keeps the other slaves from bothering you, they know the stories whispered during meals.
>They know you're just as brutal as your captors.

>>30222468
>The swaying of the cart stops, and your fellow slaves are herded out and forced marched into a trench that's barely knee deep for you
>Behind you your captors scurry about in a frenzy, preparing pillowcases, sticks, a few spears, and lots of nets
>The typical strategy you've seen time and time again, especially since your enemy seems to only know how to charge into battle headfirst
>The slaves take the brunt of the charge, then the trap gets sprung, nets for capturing, sticks and pillowcases for beating the enemy into unconsciousness, and spears for the more aggressive mares
>Sighing, you start swinging your pillowcase full of rocks over your head, ready to bash anything that gets close

>A few minutes later and no enemies are charging, no dust is being kicked up to cover their advance, no sounds of a stampede reach your ears, and your arm is slowly getting tired from swinging your pillowcase of rocks
>Either the enemy tricked your captors, or they decided to retreat
>You start thanking your lucky stars when a massive explosion of feathers goes off nearby
>Looking up you see something that surprises you, even after 2 years in this strange world
>Roman armored flying ponies, divebombing the trenches with huge pillowcases
>Seeing such a sight is so bizarre, you can't help but look up and stare
>But you forgot to keep swinging your bag of rocks, and it's momentum carries it right into your face
>The last thing you see before your vision goes black is your captors fleeing from the battle


Sorry if it's got a bit of a darker start, but it'll get into cozy and more innocent later

>>30222495
>pillow wars
>gelding and rocks inside the pillow.

This is a weird mix between cute-equestria and dark my man.

>>30222558
Maybe it's what anon thought was going on with them, same with the sex slave thing. It's never happened to him and I doubt poners would talk about it so maybe he assumed. Maybe runners got wedgies and the rest had to become cuddle slaves.

>>30222495
I'd like a little more.

>>30195004
Fuck I haven't been in this thread for years I think
Last green from here I remember reading was that one by zew, last I read of it anon just killed a bee and that was significant for some reason

What amazing green have I missed, there's any with Minotaurs?

>https://pastebin.com/22n1g2uZ

Be Short Fuse
>Be hiding under one of the many beds of the barracks.
>The Earth Goodness is mad at us! The whole room suddenly started shaking!
>Everypony except for Lima who’s hiding under the lamp of the ceiling, are trying to wait for the earthquake to stop.
>You’ve never been in a scenario like this one… well, except when Yarn Feather knocked over your magic closet by accident and the whole closet started to shake roughly and you had to reorder EVERY cloth in there.
>Compared to that time, this one is sure a Tartarus of a time.
>…Good thing nopony can hear or read your thoughts or you’ll earn thirty minutes in a cell.
>After some seconds, the earthquake seemed to stop.
>But everypony was too scared to even try to peek outside.
>Short, you need to do something! You are the warden of this prison and everypony counts with you! They’re all probably scared! Just… like you.
>Well you can’t help it! You are not Anon! Or the princesses!
>You wish you were Anon… brave and strong like him.
>Not that the princesses aren’t but…
>But you can be! No! You are brave and strong!
>Well, you aren’t as strong as him and… being a unicorn makes you more useful on your magic than strength but… but!
>You will show everypony how brave you can be!
>Yeah!
>You get out of under the bed and with courage in your voice; you speak to everypony just to let them know the earthquake is no more!
“Alright everypony! You can come out and-“
>Just as the door smashes right in and a figure of a two feet creature appears, making you yelp and jump out of the scare.
>You got scared sooooo bad; you were holding from the same lamp Lima was having a grip.
>”G-G-Get your own lamp, Warden!”
>Lima should know that sharing is caring.
>Also whoa, you should request joining the Equestria Games next year if you are /this/ good at jumping.
>”Is everyone alright?” A familiar voice speaks.
>You recognize that voice!

>>30223770

>Looking down with orange inmate clothes was Anon, looking around as he kneeled, probably knowing the rest of the ponies were hiding under the bed.
>Well, he was mostly right. He just needed to look up and spot you two.
>”Come out, come out. It’s safe now, well… I don’t know how to pronounce ‘safe’ this time… ehm…”
>Probably it wasn’t doing effect on Zakon and Nurse Redheart who remained hidden under the bed.
>Oh but you are showing Anon that you aren’t scared!
>…His door opening all of the sudden doesn’t count!
“Anon!” You say with satisfaction in your voice as you jump off to the floor.
>Or well, more like, landing on the bed for more safety since he was kneeled down looking at Zakon and Redheart who were below the bed.
>You bounce off the bed and land on the floor.
>Everypony gets out under the bed and Lima gets down the ceiling’s lamp, flying slowly and looking around in case there was a replica of the earthquake.
>Everypony is safe! And Anon too! Yay!
>Aww, he looks so concerned! He must have thought we were in danger of the earthquake!
>”Glad you guys are okay.”
>You look at the others who are trying to regain sanity from the sudden earthquake.
“We’re okay; it was just a silly earthquake!” You say while looking back at Anon, your hind legs shaking just a bit.
>…It was the jump! Not that you are still scared or anything!
>”A scary, big, not happy and loud earthquake…” Lima says while trying to remain calm at the side of Zakon.
>Maybe you need to use the microphone thingy whatever was its name to ask everypony in the prison if they’re all okay.
>”Well, speaking of scary… you guys ever heard of a, uh… Tatlzwurm?”

>>30223776

“Ooooh, you mean those scary, long and big creatures from the Bad Lands that move across the earth and sense everything from sudden shake noises but are blind and are mostly a threat to everypony that they come across? They got tentacles in their jaws too, which allows them to grab anything near their distance! It is also known that their saliva provokes a really contagious but curable flu! The experts named it the Discordia flu! And did you know the Tatlzwurms probably but unconfirmed weakness is their heads? That or heavy noises is the only possibly thing to scare them off!”
>From far away, you can sense the happy noises of a librarian alicorn as if she was proud of somepony around Equestria.
>Everypony, even Anon looks at you with a confused expression from your sudden yet explanatory words.
“What? Princess Twilight wrote a book about them! It’s just obvious I need to explain it the way she does!”
>”Well…” Anon cough on his fist. “How do I explain this? Are… those friendly?”
>Those creatures being friendly? Unless they can speak… uhh…
>”Well, nopony really wanna get close to those things… they’re scary, loud and their breath smells bad.” Lima said while walking back to the soup and trying to eat some out of the bowl. “What? Don’t tell me that the earthquake was caused by one and the prison is in danger… kekeke.”
>She started to drink some of the soup as Anon scratched behind his mask.
>Or was that his face? You never asked him about that.
*Sluuuuurp*
>Lima got good manners in front of everypony, uh?
>”Well… you would be right in that one, tiny bat. I saw this big worm when I was with Silver Pie in the library… he said it was a Tatlzwurm, or well, wanted to say… before fainting standing still.”
>Lima instantly spits all the soup that was in her mouth to the closest pony in the room.
>That one being Zakon.
>”Z-Zakon! Sorry!”
>The zebra shakes his head while giggling at Lima.

>>30223785

>”No worries, dis not da firs’ time yo get me this wet. Or was it da other way ‘round?” He finished with a smug expression.
>Lima instantly blushed and her wings started to rise a bit.
>”W-W-W-W-WHA-“
“Ooooookay! What about the Tatlzwurm you were talking about Anon? Also, what were you doing in the library? I thought you would wait for me to give you the tour!” You half-scold Anon as you try to get the attention of everypony to you instead of the couple back there.
>Better get those two to stop flirting in front of the rest.
>Maybe Zakon is taking advantage of Lima and her situation with her tiny brother and is flirting on purpose.
>”Well… first of all, about the library is a long story that I will tell you eventually, it’s something… secret. And about the rest, there was this big sandstorm outside the prison and suddenly, that thing appeared out of nowhere. It looked as if it was carrying something or someone… I’m not sure; I was paralyzed by the size of that thing…”
>See Short? Anon can get scared too! Everypony can! It’s okay to be afraid!
>But in these moments… you need to figure out what’s a Tatlzwurm doing near YOUR prison!
>Like it or not, you are going to protect this prison from anypony!
>From the open door of the barracks, a guard stands as if there was an invisible door.
>”Uh… pardon me, warden? I got important news!”
>Near the door was Royal Spear with a mortified expression as if he saw a ghost.
“What is it, Royal Spear? Something’s wrong besides… the thing Anon just told us about?”
>Everypony stared at the guard as he tried to calm down, but he looked so scared he was taking heavy breaths.
>You walk and pat his back a bit to let him know everything is okay.
“There, there… take things calmly, the earthquake and what… caused it sure are scary, but everything /will/ be okay! I promise!”
>Royal Spear looked commoved by your words; he was trying hard not to cry.
>”Y-You are very kind, ma’am.”
>SJNLBASJKDFHHNAJOD

>>30223791

“I’M A STALLION! NOT A MARE!” You angrily yell at Royal Spear, who instantly ducked on the floor.
>”Sorry! S-Sorry! Sir, sorry sir!”
>Ugh! He better be!
>Yes, yes, Anon is laughing. What’s new.
>You take a breath and ignoring your anger, you talk to the guard that confused your gender.
>Again.
“So what were the news again, Royal Spear?”
>”O-Oh!” The pony stands up from the floor. “The news! The bad news! I mean… I wish I had good news to tell but… I just can’t, warden!”
“That’s okay… we will get good news one of these days. So, what’s the bad news?”
>It was probably about the Tatlzwurm… was it close? You better hurry and- wait, what are you even going to do?
>Oh Celestia, you didn’t think about it.
>”The news is that the terrorists are here! And they want to challenge us, again! They want revenge for their previous game! And they brought a gigantic brown Tatlzwurm too!”
>…
>So that’s it.
>Those… heartless coltnappers that kidnapped a foal in front of our security decided to appear!? Those little…!
>You will waste no time.
>Not even giving an answer to Royal Spear or turning around to speak to the rest in the Barracks, you decide it’s better to be a leader and run out of the room… in direction of the entrance of the prison.
>”Short, wait!”
>”Warden!”
>They can catch up with you, you know that.
>You are furious.
>You are soooooo furious.
>Forget getting confused as a female! How dare they!
>HOW DARE THEY SHOW UP WHEN THEY HAVE A FOAL! A FOAL THEY KIDNAPPED!
>They better prepare themselves! Because you will rain the punishments on their flanks!
>Warden promise!

File: Welcome to prison.png (770KB, 1098x1092px) Image search: [Google]

770KB, 1098x1092px

>>30223797

Be The Boss
>The preparations are almost done.
“So close… yet so far.”
>The crystal is charging.
>Give it a day and it’ll be active again.
>The terrorists have arrived and will distract those little brats of prison.
>They won’t suspect a thing that is happening inside the prison.
>You chuckle slightly at yourself and the whole situation.
>That guard should be bringing cookies to everyone she can.
>That’s fine. Soon everyone in the prison will be under your hoof; it’s just a matter of time.
>Emperor Sombra soon will be upon this land…
>…He will only require a vessel to take action in this world.
>A unicorn vessel.
>Well, better fed that warden with enough cookies as you can.
>You chuckle again.
>You can almost taste the power that Emperor Sombra will gift you for your success.
>They will see you.
>They will hear you.
>They will understand you.
>They will feel you!
“Ah… I should go outside and see the games those terrorists think they’re going to win… I heard that kid got skills, but can he surpass the human, Anonymous?”
>Speaking of Anonymous… he must have a clue that you are behind all this.
>Afterall, you gave away your hoof signature.
>Courtesy of Yarn Feather.
>At this point you don’t care if he knows, you’ll win anyway.
>Or will fate be on his side?
>Who will win, Anonymous?
>You open your prison door cell and take a step outside.
>Once outside your cell, you close your door with your key.
>”We’re living in Equestria~”
>Isn’t wonderful?

Chapter end

That's it for this night for me.
Next chapter gonna be the match between terrorists and guards, the reveal of The Boss and more to come!
Anyway, expect silly stuff from the next chapter.

Page 10 bump. :(

>>30223791

>”Y-You are very kind, ma’am.”
>SJNLBASJKDFHHNAJOD


Fucking kek

Expect an update today. Sorry I couldn't yesterday, I had a hard day of work.

>>30210737
>…….
>You’re Anon, and you slept well despite the scratchy hay. Your new laundry-scented digs kept you nice and warm, you didn’t awaken in a shiver.
>Ebola is still asleep, you don’t want to wake her.
>You are hungry, and wonder if Discord is in the kitchen.
>You need one or two friends here, admit it.
>So, you head out the door and quietly creak it shut.
>There’s a pep in your step, and you smile at the guard as you walk past him.
>Today’s a great day, and you slept perfectly.
>Going down the hall, you enter the cafeteria. You see a small dragon and a familiar blue minotaur eating what you believe is cereal at the opposite end of the room.
>You see a dragonequus humming as the crackle of food echoes in the room, with the scent of eggs and breakfast foods wafting about.
>You walk to the bar and sit on the round, comfy stool.
“Discord, smells great. What’s cooking?”
>”Oh, you know, the usual. Eggs, vegetarian sausages, french toast. Wait a minute...”
>He turns around, pan in hand. “ANONYMOUS! So glad to see you, champ.”
>You chuckle at his nickname for you.
“Now, I’m not exactly a champ, but I did get pretty close. And by the way, thank you for the clothes. How’d you make them anyway?”

>>30226326
>”Simple really, all you need is magic~”
>Things must be pretty easy when you have magic to help you out.
>You’re curious to hear more about this world.
”There’s all manner of mystical creatures here, it is still a shock to me.”
>”Oh, I imagine so. The human world has few intelligent creatures aside from humans, pretty monotonous if you ask me.”
>He says that as he continues cooking more food, and sets a plate in front of you. Looks delicious and smells divine.
“Thanks, could you tell me about the different intelligent creatures that live in this world? Their cultures and such?”
>”Oh, I definitely could, but wouldn’t it be better to read them for yourself? Surely there’s a bestiary in the library you could read.”
“There’s a library here? Sweet! Man, prison here is actually pretty nice.”
>”How so, Anonymous?”
“Human prisons are pretty brutal. Theres unwarranted violence, solitary confinement cells where people don’t even get out for years on end, and worst of all rape...”
>”WHOA, ANON.” He hushes to a whisper.
>”Everyone here in Equestria is really sensitive. Talk of violence and… rape… are enough to send ponies to a psychologist or mental facility. You have to be careful what you say here.”
>Jesus, you really underestimated this world.
>You noticed the two in the corner give you weird looks, but they must not have heard you.
“Thanks Discord, I probably would have traumatized someone without your warning.”
>”No problem~. Now eat, you don’t want your food to get cold.”
>With that, you chow down on the tasty semi-vegetarian dish.

>>30226330
>You finished the hearty, filling meal.
“Where’s the library, by the way?”
>”Oh, that’s right, you’re new here.” He takes your plate and places it in a bin below the sink.
>”I’ll take you there, no worries.”
“Really? Thanks again, dude.”
>He takes off the apron and walks out of the kitchen. “Shall we?”
>The two of you head out the door together.
>You’re pretty excited to see more of this place.
>Which is pretty odd, since this is supposed to a prison.
>To your surprise, you only walk across the hall to a door a little to the left.
>He opens the door for you, and you walk in.
>It’s a hell of a spectacle for a cave. The entire floor is tiled with black marble. Mahogany shelves that tower to the ceiling.
>Orb-shaped lights hang from the ceiling artistically, and a fireplace glows in an open area with various chairs to the left.
>This is supposed to be a prison library? Gods be damned.
>Discord interrupts your wide-eyed awe.
>”Is this better than a human library, Anon?”
“Y-yes. It’s beautiful.”
>You shed a tear.
>He nudges you. “Well, lets not hang out at the door.”
>And he walks past you to a short long, L-shaped desk with a polished birch countertop on the right.
>”Oh, /you’re/ here, Purplesmart.” He groans.
>Indeed, a purple pony is writing with a quill using unicorn magic onto a long roll of parchment.

>>30226335
>Be Discord, with this normie of a human.
>You’re face-to-face with the Unicorn of Friendship.
>You just can’t stand this uptight bookhorse, not that she isn’t friendly.
>She’s probably autistic, which makes you wonder how she still has more friends than you.
>”Can I help you with something, /discord/” With extra emphasis on your name. She’s quite agitated.
“Why yes you can, actually~. Anonymous here needs a bestiary, he’s from another plane.”
>”Well, it’s actually at the tree-library in Ponyville. I needed it for-- what did you say?”
“This human right here by the name of Anon needs a bestiary.”
>”A HUMAN?! LIKE, A HOMO SAPIENS SAPIENS? WHERE IN EQUESTRIA DID YOU FIND HIM?”
>You consider warning Anon out of worry that he might spill the beans on how he insulted Celestia. Straight to her protégé.
>But you refrain, since you’re a God of Chaos, and you’d find it pretty amusing.
>He speaks for himself.
>”I’m not from Equestria. I’m from a place called America.”
>Oh god, he’s done it. Here comes the line of questioning.
>Time to get out of here, before it’s too late.
“Erm, well… I’ll be leaving then, I’ve got breakfasts to make! Tata!”

>>30226342
>You’re scratching your head, you’re most likely Anon.
>Discord poofed out of here before you could even ask why.
>You’re alone with a purple unicorn with stars in her eyes.
>”Y-y-you’ve got to tell me all about your species! I’ve only read it in one or two books of myths! You’re something of a legend!”
“Whoa now, hold on. Humans have invented many things, but we aren’t legendary or rare. There’s 6 or 7 billion of us.”
>”WHAT?! WHERE?”
“Quiet down now, and one question at a time. I have plenty of time. Humans reside in a place called Earth.”
>”What is Earth?”
“It’s a planet in the Milky Way galaxy.”
>”I’ve never heard of it. Considering the nearest habitable planet is light-years away, I don’t understand how you made it here.”
”Don’t ask me either. I fell down a well.”
>”...what?” She cocks her head in skepticism.
“That’s literally how I ended up here. I fell down a well in my world.”
>”You have to be kidding.”

>>30226347
And that's it for today. Any feedback or suggestions?

>>30226426

Discord seems really friendly and willing to help. Where are his ulterior motives? Why is Purple Smart down in tartarus? Did Ebola and Anon sleep together? Weren't you calling her Lovestruck last update? Why the name changes?

>>30226473
Q1. To be revealed.
Q2. To be revealed.
Q3. Maybe to be revealed.
Q4. Her name is Ebola Lovestruck. He hasn't decided on a nickname yet.
Q5. The names haven't changed, but the world isn't the same. Why is Discord in prison? Why is Twilight a unicorn? To be revealed.

>>30222606
that makes sense actually hopefully theres more

>>30226347
I get the feeling that there was something odd about that well

>>30226426
Feedback: nice. It's creative, it's comfy, it's funny, it's a great read.
Suggestions: moar.

>>30227725
Not really, happens to me all the time.

File: YEAAAHHH.jpg (10KB, 212x237px) Image search: [Google]

10KB, 212x237px

>>30228296
Thanks Anon, I appreciate it. I started out doing poetry, but I am beginning to enjoy writing just as much. Look forward to moar tomorrow.

>>30225090
page 10 again

Page 8 bump.

File: large-2.png (2MB, 1164x1024px) Image search: [Google]

2MB, 1164x1024px

Have a Cookies.

>>30230732
That is a very happy horse.

>>30217209
Such a perfect bliss

Here, catch.
https://pastebin.com/22n1g2uZ

>>30230732
I forgot about this image. Good shit. should be next OP.

Morning bump. Hug the police.

Page 7 bump.

>>30230732
absolutely adorable

Page 9 bump.

ditto

>>30226347
Story update. Prepare to feel.

>You’re Anon, trying to persuade a violet unicorn with glasses with your story.
>It’s not working.
>”That doesn’t make any sense. There’s gaping holes in your logic.”
“Of course there is, it’s a well.”
>You really ticked off bookhorse with that pun.
>Her violet face turns a shade of red, but you couldn’t resist.
>”Get out.”
“Aww, don’t be mad.”
>”I don’t want to hear your stupid jokes. I’m busy.”
”What about the bestiary?”

>>30237077
>Purple pony cools down a bit.
>”Oh, I’m sorry, there is only one copy and I borrowed it for a study project. Mind if I ask why you want it?”
“No problem. I want to understand the folks here, since I don’t know how long it will be until I figure out how to return to earth.”
>Her sour expression turns to one of remorse.
>”Anon, how long does your species live?”
>Her gentle manner of speaking makes you worried.
“Umm… About 85 years on average.”
>She frowns further.
>”That’s about our lifespan… I don’t think you know this, but Tartarus prisoners don’t leave for at least 100 years.”

>>30237088
>You are devastated.
>You may never get to see home again.
>You’ll never get to see your friends again.
>All of your achievements, your goal to get the gold at the Boxing Championship…
>...You’ll never get to experience life back home again.
>But you don’t cry, you’re too prideful to cry in front of somebody else. Especially someone who also looks like they’re about to cry.
>You instead shrug off your pain for the time being, and change the subject.
>”What’s your name? You nor Discord didn’t mention it.”
>”Uh… Oh, it’s Twilight. I’m sorry, Anon.”
“It’s alright. Come here, Twilight.”
>You reach over the counter, and pick up the light little pony with your arms.
>And hug her sweetly.
>She embraces your neck.
>”A-anon?”
“Yeah?”
>”Could you please put me down, it’s a bit embarrassing.”
“Oh, of course. Sorry about that, I needed it.”
>She blushes as you put her down.
>And she quietly rolls up the parchment she was writing up earlier.
>”Anon, I-I didn’t mind. Would you do that… again some time?”
>You smile and run your hand down her mane.
“Sure, no problem.”
>She avoids eye contact with rosy cheeks, as she puts bad over her bag with magic.
>And fills it with 3 books and the fresh scroll.
>”Well, I’ll be back soon. Come see me tomorrow and I’ll have your book, okay?”
>She makes her way around the desk and to the door.
“Alright then, later then, Twi.”
>She waves at you as you watch her depart to the exit.

>>30237097
>You’re left alone to your thoughts.
>And it hurts.
>You’re going to be bound to this prison for the rest of your life, because you insulted a princess.
>You must have terrible luck.
>”Anonymous~!” A familiar voice startles you from behind, and puts a paw on your shoulder.
“Discord?”
>”You guessed right!”
“I’m kind of tired. I’m going to take a nap.”
>It’s an excuse, obviously. You’re up to your ears in frustrating thoughts.
>”Anon~! You just had breakfast. How can you be still tired?”
>His curiosity is annoying you at this point.
>”Discord, I appreciate the concern, but I want to be left alone right now.”
>You walk off toward your room without giving him so much as a glance.
>That must have worked, since you don’t hear him following behind you.

>>30237105
>You’re now at your room, with a revelation looming over you.
>You fall with your back on the hay, and stare at the jagged stone ceiling.
>”Anon? Is something the matter?” Says a concerned pony who arrives next to you.
“I… don’t want to talk about it.”
>”Anonymous. It’s not healthy to keep in your feelings.”
>You can’t hold it in any longer.
>Tears are released, and you hide your face with an arm.
“This is it… This is the place I’ll live and die in.”
>She collapses onto your chest with an embrace.
>”Anon, I understand. Nearly everyone here understands what your are going through.”
>You can’t stop the tears, no matter how much you hold them back.
“Do they?! Do they understand that they’ll never get to see their family ever again? Do they know they’ll never see another of their kind once more?”
>”...Anon, I do.”
“You do…?”

>>30237115
>She looks deeply in your eyes with a single tear streaming down her lovely, soft cheek.
>”Yes. I’m the last of my race. The others died out, because they couldn’t keep their ability in check in order to conceive.”
>You wipe away your tears and hold her gently.
“You mean how you consume life-force through intercourse, right?”
>”Yes. How we reproduce is that we have to find a partner that’s immune to our life-consumption, but such a thing has been a struggle over millennia.”
“Wait… does that mean...”
>”Yeah… I was mating stallions, trying to find one immune to my accursed bloodline. But I was caught and Celestia banished me here as a result of the deaths of many.”
“That Celestia… Instead of saving you, she sent you to die! I’ll never forgive her!”
>”Anon? It’s alright… I… I deserved it. Nopony deserves to die…”
“She didn’t spare you. From what you told me of Celestia, she should have the power to save you from your curse. But she chose the easy, unjust way out.”
>”There’s nothing that can be done now...”
“Maybe there is.”

I'm no good at visual art. But Lovestruck hugging a disgruntled Anon laying on a mess of hay definitely deserves an image.

>>30237074
Yo what on Earth is that

I'm just gonna leave this bump here.

good very early morning bump

Depending on if I have the energy after work, I may or may not write today. Also, bump.

>>30238803
I dunno about you but I feel pretty dead right now
>Work yesterday at afternoon
>Work right now at morning
>Slept 2 hours
W-Watch me deliver 1k of green before sleeping and working again

Bampu.

Boomp for greenz

>>30237547
Its the weird tri unicorn thing from MLPNope's story I think

Page 9 bump.

Bump? Bump.

Bump for graves anon to come back

>>30243460
Me too. I was really looking forward to seeing the cute pet relationship with Anon and Graves turn out.

>Be a completely and absolutely ordinary day within the Canterlot Prison.
>You are the unicorn mare, Officer Hot Fuzz.
>And it's your first day on the job.

>You'd never been inside the prison before, but your months of training had all been leading to this day! You had never been so excited!
>You strode through the halls, having just received your first assignment from the warden herself. You were supposed to be looking after a new inmate, doing some one on one with somepony who hadn't been here long, had only committed a minor felony, and might just need a friend.
>In fact, you were only just looking through the file for the first time, right now!
>You opened up the large manilla folder-
"Eep!"
>You bumped into a taller griffon mare, wearing the deep blue guards uniform. She squawked as she dropped a file of her own.
>"Hey! Watch where you're going rookie! You shouldn't be reading files as you walk.
>She picked up what you're pretty sure was your file, and walked off in a huff.
"S-Sorry!"
>You called after her, idly picking up the folder she had left behind. Sheesh, griffons.
>Wait...
>You stood there, blinking as you realized your problem.
"Uh- Come back?"
>You stared longingly after her, not knowing her name or where she had gone.
>How could this have happened! You had been here for five minutes and you'd already made a mistake? The warden was going to be so mad!
>You looked down at the file.
>Well, maybe not?
>Maybe you could just play it off, and go along with the new file! How difficult an inmate could that rough and tough Griffon have been assigned?

>You opened up the file, skimming it for a cell location.
>You'd have to read more about it when you got there, lest you repeat the same mistake and somehow end up with yet another file.

>You skittered down the hall, dutifully, not knowing what you were getting yourself into.
>Next stop, the cell of some inmate registered as "Anonymous".
>How bad could it be?

Continue?

>>30243806
yes please

File: Smug Akane.jpg (30KB, 344x277px) Image search: [Google]

30KB, 344x277px

>>30243806
Naisu staruto! I'd like to see a story from mainly the perspective of the Officer.

>>30243873
Writers fund perspective switching a useful tool, but I like this mare.

>>30243806

>You weave around the hallways and corridors of the large prison.
>It took a while, but soon you arrived at cell #579 - Wing B.
>You reached up your hoof and almost gave a little knock-
>Hold it! You still had to read the file! You couldn't just waltz in there and start reading it in front of this inmate.
>That'd be very rude.

>You open up the folder, and go over the highlights.
>Name: Anonymous. Gender is male, height is six feet-
>Uh oh. You'd be dealing with a big one. He must be a minotaur or something to be so-
>Race: Unknown.
>Uh.
>The picture showed a smug grin on a weird creature you hadn't seen before.
"Maybe I've bitten off more than I can chew?"
>You looked back down the hallways. It wasn't too late to tell the warden of your mistakes and try again, right? You were sure she wouldn't be that unreasonable...
>No, you were already here! And besides, even if it was your first day, you were still a trained Guardsmare. You could handle anything!

>Inmate designation: Red. Temper: wildly variant, generally calm.
>Crime: [redacted] Duration of sentence: To be determined.
>You nod, having no idea what most of that meant.
>Was it too short of a stay to be marked down? Was he here for an extended sentence? Had his trial even happened yet?
>Your hoof reached up and knocked at the door.
>If you wanted answers, you figured you'd just have to ask for them!
>The door creaked open a moment later, and the strangest creature you had ever laid eyes on looked back at you.
>"Uh, I thought they were sending the roughest and toughest guard they had to keep an eye on me?"
>Uhhhhhh
>Oh gosh, he was so tall.
>D-Don't panic! Just- explain the situation!
"I am the the- uh-"
>You couldn't stop staring, this was a disaster!

>You shook your head and cleared your throat.
"Ahem, I am Officer Hot Fuzz a-and- And I have been assigned to be looking after you, and befriend you if necessary."
>You held out a hoof to shake.
>He reached down and shook it gently.

>>30244031
>somewhere in the prison, a low level criminal is being bulldozed by an angry griffon who doesn't understand what everyone was so worked up about this guy for
>this only unnerves her and makes her harsher towards him

>>30211465
Dude this is gold.
Anon puts criminal pones in prison

>>30244031

>After a moment or two, he lets go, and opens his room wider.
>My goodness! Only a Queen sized bed, a shag carpet, bay window, minifridge, personal bathroom, and walk in closet?
>This was...
>Quite worrying! You'd never seen a cell so lacking.
>Well- Actually, you hadn't seen any cells at all before.
>But you thought for sure they wouldn't look like-
>Well, maybe this wasn't so bad. But it seemed to be lacking something!
>As you walked inside, it took you a few seconds to realize what was missing.

"Mr. Anonymous, do you not have any personal belongings?"
>"Oh. Uh, not anymore. All of my things were confiscated. Why?"
"Isn't that, something you need? In the Guards handbook, I read that 'Every prisoner is allowed up to five personal belongings, for the sake of their mental health and well being.' Wouldn't want any prisoners getting homesick after all."
>"Y-yeah, homesick." Anon replied, looking somewhere distant.
>You didn't quite understand. Why would the prison take away Anon's stuff? They had to give it back, right?
>You would speak with the warden about it as soon as you could.

"Anyway. Why don't you introduce me to yourself? Just who are you? Why are you here?"
>Anon gives you a smug smirk, just like the one in the picture.
>"I uh- Booped her Royal Highness, Princess Celestia, non-consensually."
>WHAT
"WHAT"
>You repeat your thoughts at max volume.
>You knew his sentence had to be something weird, you weren't expecting such downright perversion!
>"I also unleashed unneccesary profanity upon her, moments prior, when I appeared in her throne room and said 'Holy shit a talking horse.'"
"A-Anonymous! Please watch you language!"
>"Yeah, she said the same thing. Then I did this."
>There was a slight pressure on your nose, and you looked down, and realized you had been booped.
>You. Hot Fuzz.
>T-that
>what

--------

>Be Anon
>The pony before you was now scrunching, super hard.
>God that was cute.
>Also, you're pretty sure your sentence just doubled.

>>30244351
>Yes.
YES!

>>30244351
oh no! she's ruined for marriage!

>>30244351

Whoops, forgot to say I was done for tonight.

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>>30244351
YES
BOOP THAT BOOPSLUT

>>30244566
That was really well done, Anon. I hope you'll write some more.

>>30244351
noice keep it going

>>30244351
Cant wait for moar QT poners getting booped

>>30244628
This

Love these stories. They remind me of my years in jail.

>>30247333
Did you boop your cellmate anon?

>Be Hot Fuzz again.
>Y-You couldn't believe it.
>Your snootle couldn't either, seeing as it was still scrunched up right into your face.
>You felt- Strange.
>Violated, and yet happy. The boop had left a warm feeling spreading through you.
>You knew prison was going to be tough. But you hadn't expected anything like this at all.
>You didn't notice it, but Anon was waving his hands in front of your face.
>"Uh, you okay there, little guard? I didn't break you, did I?"

>What did your handbook say? You struggled to remember what to do in this situation.
>'If a prisoner thinks they can push you around, push right back! Establish dominance!'
>Well, if the book said it, then it must be true.
>You unfroze yourself, and lifted your hoof, pressing it against Anon's own nose.
"B-Boop."
>You announced the word clearly, trying to reassure yourself.
>W-Wait a second, wasn't this an act of intimacy?! Weren't those also expressly forbidden by the same Guard's handbook?
>What were you thinking? What have you done?! What if you offended him by taking his boopginity!
>You'd been booped before, but what if he hadn't?
>"Cute. Okay, well now that we've introduced one another, what's on my schedule, boss?"
>Did he just call you boss!?

>Wait, did he?
>Did you successfully establish yourself as the authoritative party?
>Wow! You were so good at this!
>But also terrible!
>Okay, you just had to calm down, and think reasonably.
>Nobody had to know that you and an inmate had exchanged boops within ten seconds of knowing each other.
>And if they did find out, then you'd explain it was absolutely necessary.
>To take control of the situation and what not.
>Y-Yeah
>That'd work.

"Okay! Uh. Now that that's over..."
>You didn't really have any plans.
>You didn't know the first thing about the schedules here, or where to find anything.
>Sweet Celestia you were in over your head.
>C'mon, think think think.
"S-So, are you in any clubs?"
>"Just the boop club."
>T-That wasn't a thing!
>Was it?

>>30237160
this

>>30247333
>Self insert romantically involved with guards
>Self insert is the biggest baddest guy in prison without question
What kind of prison were you in?

>>30244351
Whoa, that was a very good start for a prison greentext, a 10/10 situation! I see a good future in your story.

>>30247928
you and I both know that's exactly what he did.

>>30248521
more thanks

>>30248521
PLEASE

CONTINUE

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>1 in 5 zebras will end up in prison
Why do you think that is, /prison/?

>>30252498
I'd imagine it has something to do with 1 in 5 ziggers committing serious crimes. More than that if you count the ones who don't get caught.

>>30247333
Hey Anon, Can I borrow your Juniecakes?

>>30248521
stop, my heart can only take so much.

s-so what do you want to do now?

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I'll post tomorrow morning, when I finish editing. Sorry for not updating sooner.

>>30249385
One made and run by tiny pastel colored horses

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>>30252498
They sell mixtapes

>>30253277
Dubs

>>30237128
Updates! It's a big one. Hope you enjoy.

>You’re hugging Anon, so you must be Ebola Lovestruck.
>Anon’s saying some pretty crazy things, but you can’t help but falling him more and more as you get to know him.
>He said he wants to save your race, and he’s shaken the resolve you’ve had as the last survivor.
“Anon, I… what can we do?”
>”We’re going to break out of here.”
“WHAT?!”
>You jump up off him in surprise.
“T-that’s impossible! Nobody’s ever made it out of here! And nobody has the power to do so!”
>”What do you mean?”
“Everypony in Tartarus has their magic nullified by the crystals. And they’re everywhere, in the walls, and especially at the entrance.”
>”Wouldn’t the guards be the same?”
“The guards are protected by a crystal on their armor that does the opposite effect. The cave crystals make them /stronger/.”
>”Yikes, it sounds like we can’t win by ourselves.”
“Anon… that’s not reassuring.”
>He gets up in epiphany.
>”I’ve got it!”
>”I’ll recruit Discord. He can still use magic.”
“Anon, his magic can only do basic things. He’s no better than a low-level unicorn. And there’s at least 10 guards at the entrance. We’ll easily get overpowered.”
>Anon looks like he’s thinking hard.
>But you know it’s futile.
“Anon, I appreciate this, I really do. But it’s impossible, okay?”

>>30254830
>She tells you that it’s impossible. But you’re Anon, and you don’t back down from a challenge.
“Guess what, Love. I have the perfect solution.”
>She blushes and stutters and your sudden use of an amorous nickname, but you don’t left her finish.
“I’m going to befriend everyone I can. And we’ll escape somewhere in Equestria together.”
>She appears to want to retort, but you have a pretty solid idea. A grand idea.
>You can win with strength in numbers, and you’re a boxer. You’ve never needed magic.
>On top of that, I’m sure you are not the only one that wants to leave this dark hole in the ground.
>”Anon, that’s… the most ridiculous idea I’ve ever heard.”
“W-well, do you have a better idea?”
>”Um… no.”
“Then it’s ON! Hellyeah! Time for lunch!”
>You are confident you can get out of here.
>And you’re confident there’s going to be a delicious lunch waiting for you.
“C’mon, Love! You’re coming with me!”
>You pick her up and put her on your shoulders and dart out the door.
>You’re amused at the shocked look on both her and the guard as you pass him by.

>>30254836
>You put her down just before you enter the dining area, you don’t want to draw unnecessary attention from the other inmates.
>”Anon! Why’d you do that!” She’s redder than pink.
“Sorry, sorry. I got caught up in the moment. Shall we?”
>You open the door and enter with your partner-in-crime.
>”Anonymous! Are you feeling better? You were so fussy earlier~” A certain dragonequus jabs.
“I’m great now. I definitely needed that nap.”
>You wink suggestively at Lovestruck.
>She chuckles quietly and plays along.
>”Discord, what’s on the menu?”
>”Vegetarian cold-cuts, your favorite!”
>Man, with all this vegetarian food, you couldn’t be healthier by the time you get out of here.
>Discord is donning a white chef coat and black leggings.
>He sure likes dressing for the occasion.
>”I sure do, Anonymous.” Says a smirking Discord.
“Err… what?”
>”Nothing!”
>He brings you sandwiches and fries on a silver platter.
>He’s going a little further than usual today.
>You can’t help but think he’s doing this to cheer you up.
>”Thanks Discord.” You tell him just before he moves to the other tables.
>You notice it’s actually pretty busy in here during lunch-time, but you were too absorbed with how passionate you are feeling to notice until now.
>”You’re definitely looking better now, disregarding that embarrassing stunt.”
“I am actually. I’m going to make the best of the time that I’m here.”
>”I’m glad to hear that. What do you want to do after we eat, Anon?”
“Not sure what there is to do except go to the library.”
>”Boring! Let’s go to the game room. I want to play “9 Stone Rumble” with you.”
“Not sure what those two things are, but it sounds like it could be fun. You’re on, Love.”

>>30254843
>You’re already pink, but you’re blushing and you can’t help it.
>You’re no doubt Ebola Lovestruck.
>Everytime he calls you by that nickname, even casually, you feel yourself getting wet for him.
>And you really hope you can compose yourself before Anon, or Celestia forbid… Discord finds a wet seat covered in your love juices.
>You hurriedly go through your sandwich, and Anon somehow has already finished before you.
>Must be that big mouth and tongue of his.
>U-unf…
>You get up from the chair quickly before you go into heat.
“Hey Anon, let’s go. I can’t wait!”
>”You’re sure raring to go. Alright then.”
>He waves at Discord, and Discord responds in kind before the two of you make your exit.
“Anon, this way!”
>You point down the right side of the hall. He follows you obediently.
>And you both make it to the end, where the Great Chamber lies. No matter how many times you see it, it still captivates you.

>>30254850
“Whoa!”
>You’re a fascinated human behind a smiling pink succubus pony.
>And in front of you lies a great, open area, teeming with blue-green crystals. A waterfall, and a golden lit, circular area covered with beautiful flora lies beyond a stone bridge on the curving path.
>You proceed along the path, taking note of the pleasant ambience of the brook that lies below, and the quietly overlapping voices of different ponies and other creatures in the area filled with flowers, small trees, and moss.
>Rays of sunlight beam into this area, lighting it like an underground oasis.
>You don’t even have words to describe how fascinated you are with this scene.
>”Pretty amazing huh? It’s called the Great Chamber. It’s a recreation area.”
“I’ve never seen anything like it in my entire life. It’s fantastic.”
>You both arrive at the stone and walk across. To the rear is a wide tunnel, but you don’t even care.
>There appears to be a little house straight past the open area, covered in grass and soft earth. And at the edge of circular flat are vines of blue orchids.

>>30254859
>There are thin, white-barked trees shaped like brushes that contain light blue leaves and pink flowers. They are scattered about the grassy flat.
>You are so absorbed into the mystical scenery that the living creatures within it are invisible to you.
>”Anon, you’ve stopped walking.”
“Oh, sorry Lovestruck. These plants don’t exist in my world. I was just so captivated.”
>”No problem. We’re headed to that house. They have the games and game tables in there.”
“Ah, that white house did seem out of place. When you simply said ‘game room’ I could not have ever expected this.”
>”The house was originally a secret hideaway for Starswirl the Bearded whenever he was stressed out. He made it so the plants bloom all year around.”
“Starswirl the Bearded?”
>”He’s the most renowned sorcerer of Equestria. A wise, all-powerful wizard. There is a portrait of him above the mantle of the house.”
“Awesome. It makes me a little jealous I have no magical ability.”
>”Don’t sweat it anon. Hey, we’re here.”
>You reach the large-double doors of the house. It’s a lot bigger up close.
“Great. Ready to head in?”

Done. Hope you guys enjoy. Descriptive writing is my niche, I think.

Thoughts?

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>>30254875
I really love this story so far, the descriptions aren't overdone and really bring life to the environment, I'm able to get a clear picture of the places in my head. My only critique is that the perspective switches happen often enough that it breaks immersion a tad, but it's nothing major.

>>30254875
Do you have a pastebin? I'd like to read this from the beginning.

>>30256423
I do actually. See:
>>30215170

>>30255742
I'll do my best to lay off a bit on the character shifts. And thank you very much.

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Pastebin fully up to date.

Fixed it.

It's dangerous to go to page 9, so take this safety bump. And know that I'll have some fresh green by tomorrow!

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>>30259493

I'mma try to write tomorrow. I've got work off. :D

Page 8 is not a friendly number.

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Once again, we arrive at Khorne's number. Cookies for Our Cookies! Boops for Her Nose!

Bampu

>>30261044
Could she be any more perfect?

Emergency bump

>>30261044
I want to cum inside Cookies.

>>30263802
There needs to be more CnC lewd

>>30264216
Lets summon Rat and tell her to do it

>>30264425
>her

Alright, enough of this bump train nonsense. Prepare for greentext.

>>30217209
>You have learned some secondhoof god knowledge from your subordinate, so you’re probably Brass Badge
>You also learned that Anon went back to his room for a nap, which means you’ve got some free time
>You weren’t much of a napping pony, and it had been a while since you’d last been able to deliver a report to Warden Sharp personally, so that’s what you decided to do
>Her office isn’t far from the guardroom, so you bid farewell to the others and trot over
>You knock on the door and get an immediate response
>”Come in!”
>The faint scent of Warden’s perfume graces your nostrils as you close the door behind you
“Good afternoon, ma’- ahem, Warden.”
>She smiles from behind her desk, gesturing for you to sit
>”Hello, Brass! How is everything? …What happened to your face?”
>You recount the whole sorry story, earning a gasp
>”Oh dear… Twitch has always been so tricky to handle. But I’m so glad you’re alright. Can I get you some juice?”
“No, thank you. I just wanted to give you my report in person. I just feel like we… haven’t gotten to chat in a while, what with recent events. Don’t you think?”
>Her smile widens
>”Absolutely!”
>A pair of juice boxes levitate out of the little refrigerator she keeps in the corner of her office
>She takes one, punching the straw through while setting the other aside
>”Now, tell me everything! How is security on Twitch? Do you think he’ll get out again? And how is our friendly red suit?”
>You start simply enough, telling her how you extended Twitch’s room confinement until the end of the week
>How Anon’s gang has actually caused /less/ trouble under his leadership
>Well, the cooking club never really did that stuff in the first place, but the weights club has gone without a write-up for days now
>Before you know it, you’ve been talking for 10 minutes straight
>Warden just sits and smiles, resting her chin on her hooves while she listens

>>30266446
>You feel a little parched and your eyes drift to the second juice box on Warden’s desk
“May I-?”
>The sentence is halfway out of your mouth when the little box floats to you
>”Of course.”
>You punch the straw through and take a sip before continuing
>About how much fun you’ve had with Anon, at first, but the conversation eventually meanders
>This always happens when you talk with Warden, but only with her
>Normally you’re a pretty quiet pony
>But Warden seems to know just what questions to ask, just what little comments to make to draw more out of you
>And she always has at least two juice boxes in her fridge, somehow
>”It sounds like everything’s going smoothly. And you seem happier, which makes me happy!”
>O-Oh
>You’re never sure how to respond when she gets like this
“T-Thanks.”
>You look down and take a long sip on your juice box to hide your mild embarrassment
>Now that she mentions it, though…
>You’ve always been curious why she hired you
>She knew why you left the guard, and yet she still took you on
>You haven’t questioned it all this time because you didn’t want to make light of her kindness, but it’s been two years
>Maybe now you can finally get an answer
“Warden?”
>You catch her mid sip, and she tilts her head inquisitively
>”Mhm?”
“Why did you let me have this job?”
>She gives you the same look Anon gave you after you said you weren’t a good pony!
>Why do you keep getting that look?!
>Setting her juice box down on her desk, she looks into your eyes
>”Because you were far and away the most qualified. What brought this on? Do you not like working here?”
“No, not at all! I mean, yes I do. Very much. But why me? When I first came here, I was nothing but a criminal.”
>She doesn’t say anything for a while, just searches your face
>But instead of a rebuke or a denial, her eyes just soften
>”Do you still see yourself that way?”

>>30266454
“I was charged with war crimes, Warden. My views on it don’t matter. I was only able to leave the guard in good grace because the captain and Her Majesty allowed me to step down. What other way is there to see myself?”
>She rubs a hoof against her temple
>”Have you ever noticed that truly bad ponies never see themselves as bad ponies, Brass?”
“Well, yes. I’ve seen plenty of those. But just because I acknowledge it doesn’t make it go away.”
>”Certainly not. And while it was only a single mistake, it was still a grave one. But the fact that you know that, feel genuine remorse, and want to make up for it tells me everything I need to know, you absolute goof.”
“H-Hey! That’s uncalled for, I’m not a g-“
>She leans across her desk and takes your free hoof in hers before you can finish your sentence
>”You are an incurable goofball. It’s why I can’t leave you alone, or you’ll start telling everyone ridiculous things like you’re a bad pony.”
>Well, she’s not wrong
>But you didn’t tell /everyone/, just Anon!
>”I understand your feelings. And I hired you partly because of them. The Brass Badge that I remember is an incredibly driven pony who lives to protect others…”
>Her smile returns
>”…yet is also incredibly dense and unable to tell how others feel about him.”
>You stutter and avert your eyes, unsure of how to respond
>You weren’t expecting a response like this
>Your face flushes as you manage to grumble out a reply
“…’M not dense.”
>Warden just giggles, releasing your hoof
>”If you say soooo~.”
>You hurriedly finish your juice and rise
“W-Well, if it’s all the same to you, ma’am-“
>Warden clears her throat, cutting you off with a look
>You realize your mistake
“Er, Warden, I’ll resume my duties.”
>She stands too, circling around her desk
>You only have time to turn and properly face her before she has you wrapped in a hug

>>30266462
>”Don’t, and I mean /don’t/, ever think you’re a bad pony, Brass Badge. A stallion who made a mistake, yes. But there isn’t an ounce of badness in you.”
>Your shoulders slowly relax, and you return your old friend’s embrace
“…Thank you, Sharp.”
>She hums happily
>”There. It wasn’t so hard to use my old nickname, now was it?”
>You smile sheepishly, gently pulling away from the embrace
“I’ll make a mental note for the future.”
>Suddenly feeling better than you have in a long time, you snap to attention
“Guard Overseer Brass Badge, seeking permission to return to duties!”
>She laughs, returning the gesture
>”You are dismissed, Overseer!”
>You perform a neat about-face and stride out the door
>As you turn to close it you see Warden has returned to her seat, smiling at you
>You manage to return it before the door hits the jamb
>Right
>That’s enough wallowing in old feelings for the day
>Back to work!
>Let’s go take care of some papers until nap time is over

>You've seen some things, so you're Hat Trick
>You lie on your bed in your cell, still quivering slightly after your ordeal in the ultra-high security wing
>Meowing manticores, that was the most scared you've been in your whole life!
>But you haven't given up hope
>Twitch is a nutcase, no doubt, but he can still be reasoned with
>He's sure to help you if you help him first
>You just need to get that key off of the Overseer somehow...
>But how?
>Brass Badge is almost as scary as Twitch is
>You saw him throw that nose punch like it was nothing!
>Normal ponies don't do that!
>Your resolve to get the nurse with the nice butt only intensifies
>A mare like that doesn't belong in a place like this!

All I have for now. A lot of side character development, but we'll get back to being Anon next time.

>>30266543
Brass x warden confirmed.

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>>30266651

>>30266543
I'm enjoying the dynamic between these two. Keep it up, Phys.

>>30268271
Thanks for the feedback, m80. And I'll see this story to the end, don't worry.

>>30266543
I feel like Anon might actually enjoy an actual fight with Twitch in such a candy coated world.

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I kinda wanted to be a normie tomorrow, but I'll forget about that and write tomorrow.
I'll try to get at least one update or two this weekend.

nudge

Pasge 10 woah.

>>30270689

>>30272162

Gonna pump my bump in your rump.

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>>30268377
You're gonna see it through to the end. Pic related

>>30266543
YEEEEEEEEEEEES

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Instead of bumping, posting pictures and some other stuff, don't you guys think we should make a discussion on the current stories?
How they're going to continue
How they're going to finish
Etc.
I dunno, something something discussion.

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Guess you guys don't know what to argue

Aaaaand we hit page 10.

>>30279988
Dubble dubs confirm Anons got nothing to say about green. Maybe they have an especially deadly yo mama joke to use against other prisoners.

>>30281391
we couldn't say anything because we all got sent to time out for excessive bumping