Aww shit, whose turn was it to watch her!

>>30136747
Why is Flitter's balls calling my name?

>>30136747
>You are Anon, Royal Therapist
>When you signed up for the job, you had just assumed that your primary problem would be Luna
>She'd spent a thousand years on the moon, and probably had unresolved issues with her sister.
>Turned out Luna, aside from being old fashioned and behind the times, was fairly stable
>It was Celestia, who most everypony considered to be perfectly normal, that was barely holding on to her sanity.

>>30136796
>they look at me like i'm their mother, do you know how hard it is to rule a country when everyone thinks i'm going to give them a time-out as punishment!
>and the worst part is that they'd actually follow it if i ever gave them out!
>as a joke i told a royal guard to stand in the corner and think about what he did and i found him there at the end of the day!

>>30136747
I always pictured celestia being much like ventiswill from Harvest moon rune factory 4

Like this impression of some mythic god-pony of royal standing was something she just kind of fell into , an image she feels she HAS to maintain to keep the status quo, but really what she wants is to just be herself, but is too scared to try

>>30136747
Shamless self bump

>>30136796
>>30136928
would read.

>>30138565
>Mothers day rolls around.
>Entire royal guard give her a hoof made card bigger than she is.
>Canterlot nobles compete to give her the most elaborate and impractical #1 mom mug.
>She's practically buried in cakes and other confectionary sent from across equestria.
>Venturing out of the castle starts an impromptu parade no matter where she goes.
>She has to accept it all with a smile, displaying the barest hint of displeasure on today of all days would be catastrophic.
>Last time she slipped it almost caused a war with the gryphons, it wasnt the ambassador's fault she was reminded of Luna's banishment just as he walked by.
>You're glad you noticed before your little ponies did more than light the torches, the pitchforks were thankfully on the other side of town.

>>30136747
>Ever since Luna returned from tthe moon Celestia has been trying her best to reconcile with her sister
>Talking to her at every single opportunity, helping with even the smallest of issues
>Never again would her little sister have to be alone, nor would she have to face any hardships or inconveniences
>Of course, this behaviour quickly becomes overbearing and Luna starts to avoid Celestia as best she can
>"ANOON! I GREETED LUNA IN THE HALLWAY BUT SHE IGNORED ME AND LOCKED HERSELF IN HER ROOM! SHE HATES ME, SHE'LL NEVER FORGIVE ME FOR SENDING HER TO THE MOON! I'M THE WORST SISTER EVER!"

>>30138787
awwww, that sounds incredibly sweet and heartwarming.
A bit annoying, but honestly, who wouldn't want Celestia to be their mom?

>>30138834
Arguably would have been a more entertaining episode than the one we got.

>>30138838
Nobody, that's the problem.
>When she thinks even anon starts to show the signs of adopting her she snaps and starts flirting with him shamelessly to try and head it off.
>Only her methods are so outdated it seems like she's just being overly friendly.
>Rest of the castle picks up on it and starts treating anon like a new step-dad.
>Luna think's the whole thing is hilarious and starts treating anon like a brother just to stir shit.

>>30138900
>Rest of the castle picks up on it and starts treating anon like a new step-dad.
In a passive-aggressive 'you're not my real dad!' way?

>>30136796
>Celestia has issues.
This would explain a lot of her behaviour in s07e10,
making your version a lot more realistic than Hasbro's.

File: You bow to no one..jpg (260KB, 1300x810px) Image search: [Google]

260KB, 1300x810px

>>30138965
Thats the nobles.
The royal guard constantly challenge his worth.
>"Hey anon bet any of us in the barracks could drink you under the table."
>"Anon, how about we have a race through the royal maze?"
>"Anon the minotaur ambassador keeps talking shit about you behind your back, challenge him to a hoof wrestle."
>"Hey anon, know any good stories?"
>Pony alcohol is weak as shit compared to human stock, anon helps clean up after they trash the place.
>Anon's tall enough he can see over the edge of the maze, helps a few of the guards out when they got lost.
>Ambassador was a bit of a runt back home which is why he got the job as ambassador, enjoyed a close contest for once even if he lost.
>Anon arrived in Equestria with the LoTR trilogy, modfied it on the fly for Equestrians as the guards bedded down for the night as it was the only time the majority of them had no duties and no other reason.
>Gondor are Pegasi, Rohan are Earth ponies, Elves are Unicorns, Dwarves are diamond dogs, Hobbits are breezies, Wizards are Alicorns.
>Princess Gandalf falling to the balrog had them in tears, while him leading the Earth pony charge of helms deep with the sun rising at their backs caused an eruption of cheers.
>Arahorn's ascension to princess was met with much rejoicing.
>One sleepily say's "Thanks dad", anon laughs it off thinking the newbie is being hazed by the other guys.

File: oh look, a reason to live.gif (3MB, 250x188px) Image search: [Google]

3MB, 250x188px

>>30139170
I have never wanted dad Anon green more

>>30139271
>"Anon, would like to participate in a routine training exercise next tuesday?"
>"Sure why not, good way stay in shape."
>Literally just a hoofball tournament.
>Anon's quickly drafted as referee after a couple fights break out over whose team he should be on.
>Takes his job seriously, is firm but fair with his judgement calls.
>Didnt feel like he did much of anything, so the following week he organises after-training snacks for everypony.
>Couple guards mention favorite sandwiches, he makes sure they're added next time.
>Couple weeks later he starts organising things into individual bags for convienance.
>A few months later he's personalised each guard's lunch bag after Celestia let him know of their preferences.
>"Him, him and him dont like tomato, this group here prefer no crusts on the bread and that group have apples instead of cupcakes because SOMEONE keeps sneaking them sweets."
>"I'll remember to bring a fruitbasket the next time a certain SOMEPONY asks for an extra slice of cake."
>"You fiend."

Writing green is a hell of a way to realise you have father issues.

>>30139576
That's pretty nice

>>30139576
>Writing green is a hell of a way to realise you have father issues.
Oh.

8ump

>>30141668
bumpier

>"Captain, i've an idea for a survival exercise you could put the guard through, i used to do something similar back home and it really helped my first few days in equestria."
>"it involves building a shelter, gathering food, making a fire and staying in good physical condition so that you can either rescue yourself or be rescued in the event of an emergency."
>"These were the methods you used on arrival? Interesting, you realise you're going to have to supervise to ensure we learn correctly."
>"Of course, if even one pony is helped by this then its worth the effort."
>And so Anon took the royal guard camping.

>>30136747
>i dont care what face you pull, you're not getting any more scratchies until you tell me your birthday.

Nein.

>>30136747
>It started with a quiet murmuring outside your door as you were catching up on some reading.
>That got louder.
>And louder.
>And louder.
>After enough time, you thought you knew who it was.
"Celestia? Is that you?"
>The sniffling outside stopped.
"Do you want to come in?"
>The door quietly inched open, and the Princess of the Day let herself in.
>She was looking down, and her hooves were dragging on the floor.
>You could even swear that her mane was floating lower then it normally did.
>With only the sounds of quiet sniffling, Celestia came over to you, climbed up onto your bed, and pressed her face into your chest.
>You could feel your shirt becoming wet with tears as you laid your book aside and began stroking her neck.
"Do you want to talk about it?"
>She shook her head 'no'.
"Well, I'll be here for you when you want to."
>You must have sat like that with her for hours. At the very least it sure felt like it.

I like this thread.

>>30144066
>The next morning you wake up alone, the sun already risen.
>Celestia greets you in the throne room as if nothing happened.
>Thinking that the stress of something important was simply too much for her last night, you decide not to mention it.
>You had barely read more than a page further in your book when you hear a knock on your door.
>It's celestia again, thankfully not crying this time but still looking as down as she did last night.
>With a quiet sigh, you throw your arms wide
>She must really need this to visit twice in a row.
>She'll tell you what it's about when she's ready, you suppose there are worse cuddle buddies.

>>30144779
This is nice.

>"I'm so sorry, Anon."
"Yeah, I get that. You've said so a hundred times."
>"I just thought it would be really fun, that's all."
"Well, it wasn't."
>"Come on, how was I supposed to know that humans can't fly?"
"Dash, I don't even have wings, for crying in a bucket!"
>You are lying in a bed at the Ponyville General Hospital, swaddled in blankets and bandages.
>Since you regained consciousness, a distraught Rainbow Dash has appeared daily at your bedside to express her regrets.
>Today she has brought Fluttershy with her for moral support, which doesn't really help that much as she is still too scared of you to talk to you.
>A nurse enters the room.
>"All right you two, visiting hours are over, so scoot."
>Saved by the bell.
>"It's time for Mr. Anonymous's therapy."
>Therapy? What therapy?
>"Okay, see you tomorrow Anon," Rainbow Dash says as she slouches out of the room.
>A barely audible voice squeaks, "Get well soon, Anon."
>That raises the count of words Fluttershy has said to you to a grand total of nine.
>The nurse quickly and efficiently takes your vital signs, writing them on a chart hanging on one wall.
>"Could you scoot over, please?"
>Maybe she wants you closer to the edge of the bed to make this therapy a little easier.
>"A little more? That's fine, right there."
"So what kind of therapy is this?"
>In answer, the nurse climbs into bed with you, lies down, and gently nestles herself into your side before draping one fore hoof across your chest.
"Wait, what? Time out! I thought this was a therapy session!"
>"It is, Mr. Anonymous. Cuddle Therapy."
"Cuddle therapy? That's a thing here?"
>"Try to relax."
"How is cuddling even a therapy?"
>The nurse's body heat radiates into you as she draws herself into almost embarrassingly close contact.

>>30145511

>"Studies by the Royal Canterlot College of Medicine have conclusively demonstrated that daily cuddles speed recovery, and increase the probability of positive medical outcomes."
>The nurse snuggles further into you, her muzzle pressing gently into your neck.
"Um, I don't mean to be rude, but this feels just a little awkward for me."
>"Oh? Why is that?"
>Her soft voice comes from right beneath your ear.
>You fidget before answering, attempting to guard more sensitive portions of your anatomy.
"Well, I'm a guy, and you're a girl, and I don't even know your name..."
>"I could call for a male attendant if that would be more-"
"No."
>You hastily interrupt.
>That would be even more awkward.
>"It's Bonesaw."
"Bonesaw?"
>Nurse Bonesaw gives you a squeeze before continuing.
>"I only didn't tell you because some ponies find the name off-putting."
>You hope that you haven't offended her.
"Oh, well, I'm not bothered by it, really."
>This apparently earns you another squeeze.
>"Please try to relax. It helps the therapy work if you can calm down."
"Cuddle therapy works for broken bones?"
>"Cuddle therapy works for everything short of clinical death."
>You remind yourself, not for the first time, that this is not the world you grew up on, and that they do things differently here.
>You take a deep breath and blow it out.
"Yeah, okay. Cuddle therapy. I'll try anything once."
>"Good. Now shush."
>Doctor's orders, you guess.
>Tentatively, you slide your good arm around her, and she doesn't react.
>"There you go. Now you're getting the idea."
>It's so peaceful that you nearly drift off to sleep.
>It's so comfy that you're actually disappointed when she gently disengages herself from you an hour later, telling you that she has to see other patients.
>After she leaves, you drift off into restful slumber.

>>30139576
Ughh, you should make a pastebin. We need a dad anon general. Anything for more.

File: serious.png (375KB, 341x435px) Image search: [Google]

375KB, 341x435px

>>30145613
>We need a dad anon general.
>We need another general.
>We need a general.

>>30145613
Didnt we have one already and it's in the grave

What is the theme here?
DadAnon?
Therapist Anon?
or Celly's shenanigans?

>>30136747
What happened to her teeth?

>>30145916
Whatever you want, as long as it relates in some way to the prompt.

Want Anon to pull Celestia into a hug and tell her if she's a good girl they can get ice cream? Go for it.

Want it to be about 6 Anons who had a schedule of watching Celestia and making sure she's ok? You do you famalama.

>>30142601
Nice setup anon. I liked this post. Underrated.

>>30138834
1000 fucking years ALONE on the moon


There's absolutely no way Luna isnt plotting her revenge, that much time would forge hate unimaginable to normal people.


Celestia is cool but she IS the worst sister ever, that's crueler than death punishment

Imagine spending the next 60 seconds bored

Really think about it, see how long that can feel? Now think about an hour, then a day. With absolutely nothing to do

You wont truely be able to comprehend how much a month or even a week like that would blow

Much less a year, or a fucking thousand

>"ANOOON!"
>Jesus fuck! Not again!
>You can hear the wail of the sun princess from your room...just because she put your room beside hers.
>You stood up from your bed...Jesus it's almost midnight. What is wrong this time?!
>Kicking her door, a glow of magic quickly opened the door and snatched you inside.
>There lays the Sun Princess Celestia, sobbing like a child whose ice cream fell to the cruelty of gravity.
"What is it this time?"
>"A-Anooon! m-m-muh-"
>Then she cried again. You sigh and approached the princess
>The only thing that calm her is a snuggle. Soft fur tho but the snot kinda ruined it
"There,there. Now what is the problem?"
>"M-my bedroom cake is gone!BWAAAAH!"
>Bed-whatnow?
"Your what?"
>"My midnight snack! I bet Luna is pranking me agaaaaaaaain!"
"...."
>Sometimes, you regret coming here....sometimes
"Look Celly"
>You stroke them rainbow mane
"You told me to remove them remember?"
>Now she gave you the look of betrayal
>"B-but why?"
>And you smack her fat flank.
"That's why! You are still on your diet!"
>Now the pouting phase commence
>"B-but-"
"No!"
>"O-only a bit?"
"Nope"
>"P-pretty pleeease?"
"A big no"
>This goes on until she sleep and you have no choice but to join in...because lazyness.
>Next morning, the blinding sunray woke you up and the princess herself is already gone. You got up and walk to the washroom. Just as you opened the door, a white furred princess greets you.
>"Oh Anonymous! I am very grateful for your assistance in my diet"
>you just grunt, too tired for this shit

File: 2016-04-28 21.46.53.png (2MB, 1400x1400px) Image search: [Google]

2MB, 1400x1400px

>>30147843
I imagine that an immortal in such a situation would delve into an extremely deep form of dreaming or meditation. At first, they would ponder their situation, morals, general thoughts until they grew entirely bored of them. At that point, they'd just lapse into a stupor or a dreamless sleep until something stirs them from their slumber. Surely they couldn't stay concentrated on watching the time crawl by for long before finding a way to cope.

File: proffesional_therapist.gif (450KB, 500x338px) Image search: [Google]

450KB, 500x338px

>"You know, we were just thinking about last Nightmare Night..."
"Luna, 'We'?"
>"Ah, y-yes... *I* was just thinking about last Nightmare Night, and remembered a little foal."
"Go on."
>"The foal was just sitting there, smiling, smiling!"
"Well, what's the problem with that?"
>"The foal sat there, for 15 minutes, just staring! Well, we couldn't take it anymore."
>"We... *I* asked the foal, 'What are thou pondering, little one?' and the foal says, 'Candy' Candy!"
>You nod, but you're not sure what she's getting at but you nod anyways.
>"When was the last time you day-dreamed about candy, Dr. Anon? When?!"
>Actually, now that she mentions it, you miss the candy back at home.
>"Even the thought! I've never had a day where I could just sit and ponder candy! I can't anymore!"
>She slumps back into her chair.
"You're making great progress, Luna. Maybe soon we can start on the Canterlot Voice."
>"There's so many other things on my mind to think about candy. 'What are we?' 'Who picked me to raise the moon?' 'Am I gay for Tia?' 'What is this black blotch on my flank?' there's no room for candy."
"You're a princess, Luna. You have responsibilities. You have blotches too, I assume."
"You know what your problem is? You're spending too much time with busy ponies. It's rubbing off on you."
>"So, thou believes I should stop being princess?"
"No, you know what I mean."
>"That sounds like, I telling you, to stop helping fat ponies."
"Don't talk about yourself or your sister like that, speaking of which, how's she been? Have you been talking?"
>She looks down and sinks into her royal therapy chair.
>"No, not quite."
"Maybe I should have a talk with her?"
>"That may do her good..."
"Here, take my card and when you see her-"
>"Who's this little human?"
"That's me. Does it not look like me?"
>"What is it you're holding?"
"A pencil, why?"
>"Oh."
"What did you think it was?"
>"I, uh... Don't know. Yes, that is a pencil."

I hope someone gets the reference.

>>30139170
>>30138787
>>30139576
>>30138900
so does that mean they do the same thing for anon on fathers day that they for celestia on mothers day? i.e. gifts and parades and whatnot.

I don't really think Luna was imprisoned on the moon, as if stranded on it's surface, bored beyond words for 1000 years.

I think it is more likely that she literally was
>banished and imprisoned IN the moon
Maybe she was in some kind suspended animation, without awareness.

>>30149374
He's not been around long enough to get the same level of attention.
>blueblood gave him a mug with "pretty cool guy i guess" on it,
>royal guard chipped in to replicate a 'swissamy' knife he mentioned while camping.
>pinkie threw him a 'Congratulations on your adoption' party, he figured it was just another way to celebrate him fitting into equestria.
>celestia's secretary gave him a calender with her birthday helpfully circled.

>>30149631
>secretary pony(Raven?) notices anon's schedule is all over the place, if far smaller and less important than the princesses.
>notices celestia is happier when she spends time with anon.
>starts organising his days better.
>anon is surprised at how much free time he gets.
>starts hanging out with celestia more, even outside her free time.
>cites "diplodimensional immunity" if anyone questions it.
>everyone eventually gets used to his presence after the royal guard repeatedly say they dont want to cause an interdimensional incident with 'Humanitria" by removing him by force.

Outlet

>>30150717
Inlet, as in celestia's crying a river over anon saying she shouldnt eat pancakes everyday.

>>30151464
manlet?

writefags please

bum

>>30149631
>Anon adoption day became an anniversary every year
>Small party was held on the barrack and the bars where anon usually visit.
>They kept buying Anon beers and gift while expecting stories about him and Celestia
>Anon thought this is just a national event that he doesnt know about.
>Celestia is a bit confused too but allowed it
>Luna knows but doesnt give a fuck

>Guard Bigballs idly scratched his... neck, while glancing around.
>Standing proud, with a spear in his hand, he was ready to defend anypony or anyprincess in need.
>(And yes, the spear was designed for combat, and had a steel tip at the top.)
>Guard Gentletush came trotting down the hallway, looking sad.
>"Hey, Tushie, why the lon... sad face?"
>"The captain changed my shift and now I have to stand outside Sillystia’s quarters instead of Luna’s."
>Bigballs face contorted in pain as if watching his sister banged by Discord.
>"Oh, geez, I’m sorry to hear that. Is it a punishment?"
>"No, it just couldn’t be helped the captain said. Guard Shovelit went nuts, and is recuperating at home."
>"He couldn’t stand Sillystia’s constant bawling, eh?"
>Gentletush nodded his head before looking up at Bigballs with pain in his eyes.
>"It really gets into your spine. I mean, if you could plug your ears it would be a lot easier."
>"Or if we were allowed to talk to her and tell her to calm down."
>"But we’re not allowed to talk to her since some tried suggesting a final solution."
>Gentletush sighed and Bigballs nodded sympathetically.
Hey! Are you trash-talking Celestia?
>"NO SIR, NO!" the two guards said simultaneously.
Have you ever considered that it’s is your cold hearts and rigid manners that makes her feel unwanted?
>"NO SIR, NO!"
You should treat a lady with affection and give her attention.
>"YES SIR, YES!"
>You scoff at the guards and keep walking.
>"Wow, that Anon sure can be a soft dick."
>"Agreed. But he’s pretty cute. I say we gather the force, buy him some flowers and a cake and try to make him one of the gang."
>"I don’t know... he seems like a girlfag to me."
>"Well, maybe some other time."

>come for thread about cute celly
>instantly turns into thread about guards and anon
F-fuck you

>>30156554
.t Celestia