You and Rarity have been going out for a year now. She wants

>>29564185
I'd _________________________wake up________________

>>29564185
Ignore her. Go to nearest casino.

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>>29564185
I cheat on her.

>>29564185
"Its a surprise!"
>Proceed to scream internally because I actually forgot about the anniversary.
>Spend whole day running around like a chicken with his head cut off, desperately trying to scramble something together so she wont be disappointed.

>>29564185
a romantic week-end that end with a marriage proposal.

>>29564185
"You."

>>29564185
>rape

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>>29564185
>You and Rarity have been going out
>Rarity
>going out with pathetic loser like you

>>29564185
"We're going to that fancy restaurant in Canterlot you like."
>"But getting a reservation there is impossible!"
"I am the only green alien on this entire planet. I worked something out."

>The week before
"Please! Save me from these rich monsters! They treat me like an animal! I was not meant to be sold!"
>"Atta boy. We haven't had this much new business in years. Keep it up."
"So long as you keep up your end of the bargain, we're good."
>"Yes yes, you and your marefriend-whoever the poor filly is, will have a table here."
"What kind of table?"
>"Ugh, a GOOD table."
"Excellent. Also, I'm keeping the tip jar."
>"They're tipping you?"
"Being a victim sells. Speaking of- PLEASE! You, filly, help me! Get your parents to saaaave me!"

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>>29564185
I
>bend over

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A trip to Manehattan to take in the sights, followed by a lunch at an expensive restaurant and a visit to the theatre before taking a long walk in the evening under the moonlight.

Why am I never this creative with real women?

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>>29564190
>tfw she's not real

Go cry in a fucking corner because she's not real.

>>29565039
forgot the >

>>29564185
Bend over of course.

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>>29564185
>anniversary of going out
that's not a thing as far as i'm concerned, tell her that she can piss off

>>29565088
Ah, I see you've never met a real woman before. Let me tell you, they are perfectly willing to turn ANY period of time into an anniversary and for any reason. They fucking love that shit.

>>29565152
Good for them, let her celebrate it alone if she wishes so.

>>29565163
this
Why would anyone invest in temperamental shit? The fleshlight never throws an anniversary or demands retardedly expensive rocks as gifts. One-time investment and gentle maintenance makes for years of pleasure.

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I have the perfect anniversary present, conversion

>>29565173
No, deluding yourself that you can ever be fulfilled without real love and satisfied with pitifully masturbating is no good either.

>>29565206
>delusion
What is the divorce rate right now? That is just the people who don't love one another enough to continue suffering their presence. A lot more exist in loveless marriages due to various reasons.

Delusion is believing in >real love in the first place.

>>29564185
>You and Rarity have been going out for a year now
Bullcrap

>>29564199
dubs are right

>>29564185

Divorce