Sex in exchange for acting normal

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Welcome back

sounds fun

>>29275906
Bumping out of interest

>>29275918
How many more attempts will OP make I wonder

>>29275906
Are you trying to bump specific threads off the catalog or something? Why do you keep posting and deleting this thread?

>>29275906
Acting normal?!
This sex for being a desperate chore whore. This is not normal retard. It's submission at its purest

>>29276823
Rest assured I will be here to say hello at the start of each one.

>>29276838
Its her telling him to clean his house first

>>29275906
>horses providing sex acts in exchange for being a normalfag
i fucking had to read that twice to get it

>>29276864
>this guy is so triggered by the prompt that he camps out ITT and will stalk the catalogue if it goes down, and seemingly already did and thinks it's funny to post screen caps of his autistic shit posting

>>29276945
Anon, If i was trading on the silk road, id be the richest man in existence from the amount of salt you have been supplying me.

You caused this, and i enjoy it.

Welcome to 4chan

>>29276965
that post breaks GR-7 anon.

>>29276978
>implications are equal to statements

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>>29276978
>mfw I can still post

>>29277160
Your point?

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>>29277252
The more you post the more you bump my thread
Sage bombing would be a bad idea
It's time to leave my thread

>>29275906
shieet, it would take about a week to do all this shiet.

But honestly, I wouldnt mind.
No way I would do all this things for myself, but for her, yeah, sure.
I welcome anything that would drive me to actually do things instead of shitposting on the Vietnamese basket-weaving forum.

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>>29275906
>providing sex acts in exchange for being a normalfag

If doing all that shit just for some pussy is normalfag behavior then I'd gladly stay on course with the wizard route, jesus.

I came in here expecting green of waifus taking an antisocial Anon out to group/public events or activities and coercing him to be on his best behavior with promises of sex acts, not some huge simp putting the pussy on a pedestal and bending over backwards just for the opportunity to be close to a vagina

So is any actual green going to come of this or are we just going to keep unironic shitposting until the thread dies?

>>29278522
Well, she coerces you with pussy to turn your basement neet-cave into normal, clean and well-maintained house.
Would you do it for her?

>>29278587
Maybe, Ive never written shit in my life. Bad grammar and spelling mistakes inbound, I would drop it halfway though too, probably.

>>29275906
>That face
That's the face of someone who just passed a law making your penis her property

>>29275906
>Implying there's not a hundred servants and volunteers lined up for this sort of shit

>>29275906
You know I never really intended to continue this, right? I just wrote it while half drunk as an excuse to list all the things I genuinely need to do around the house over the coming weeks. I'll try and through some shit together if people want, but it's probably not worth keeping the thread alive in hopes of.

>>29275906
What kind of ass backwards ree9k prompt is this

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"Sunny Buns, couldn't you just loan me a few of your maids for the weekend? Not many, just one or two, I'm sure we can work through your list in no time."
>Celestia tutted, rolling her eyes at you.
>"Anon, though I certainly could do that, it would technically be in breach of their employment contracts to ask them to clean anything other than the palace grounds. I have no doubt that they'd happily agree, partly due to the fact that I'd feel obliged to pay them double for their time, but why not think of this as an opportunity to impress me with your dedication? A little relationship advice to keep in mind, a lot of mares like a partner that'll pull their weight and help out around the house."
>You glance down at the list again, your eyes skimming over some of the later instructions such as to re-grout the bathroom tiles and alphabetise your bookcases.
"Help out? Celestia, there's at least a few solid days worth of work here. More if you take into account that I have a job and that my free time-"
>She holds up a wing, silencing you with a primary feather to the lips.
>"Your workplace has already been contacted and instructed by royal decree to allow you the entirety of next week off."
>You can't help but notice the hint of a smug smile upon her lips.
"Well great, I'll just have to not eat anything this week, you know, seeing as I won't be getting paid."
>She chuckles.
>"Oh, who said anything about not getting paid? I made it very clear that as you were to be engaged in official government business, your employer was to see to it that you should be compensated for your time."
>You're actually somewhat impressed.
"Wait, you got me paid leave? Huh... not that I'm not a huge fan of royalty abusing their positions for personal reasons, but how'd you manage that?"
>She gives you a coy smile.
>"Abusing their positions? Nonsense, I simply suggested that if they were to agree then the tax office may look favourably upon them this year. I can be very persuasive, Anonymous."

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>>29278953

>You groan and look down at the list once again.
>Where to begin?
>Logically you should do the dirtiest jobs first so as not to make a mess after already having cleaned.
"Alright, fine... I guess I'll start with taking up the kitchen floor then."
>She grins at you, leaning forwards a second time and again giving you a kiss on the cheek.
>"That's the spirit! Certainly linoleum went out of style some time in the last century, even Luna knows that."
>You laugh sarcastically.
"Great, really... and I suppose you'll be helping every step of the way, right?"
>She smirks at you, hiding her face behind a wing.
>"Dirty jobs aren't my speciality, though rest assured that I shall be providing moral support and managerial oversight whenever it should be required."
>You frown.
"Well lucky me, I guess."
>Her smile remains unflinching.
"Okay, then I suppose I'll be heading to the store to find-"
>She interrupts you again a second time in much the same manner as the last.
>"Replacement flooring has already been ordered and should be delivered shortly."
>You're somewhat taken aback.
"What? Don't you think I should at least pick it myself?"
>She looks puzzled.
>"For what purpose?"
>You give her a deadpan stare.
"To make sure I like it, Celestia. This is my house, remember? Mine."
>She scoffs.
>"Of course you'll like it, Anon. I chose it after all, and I believe you should know by now that my taste is exemplary."
>You facepalm.
"Fine, whatever, I'm not going to argue."
>"Now there's no need to grumble. I assure you that your reward once your task is accomplished shall be worth the effort."
>It damn well better be!
"I'll hold you to that, Sunbum, but I swear to god that if at the end of this you tell me that my reward was 'a valuable lesson along the way' then I'll shave your tail off."
>You sigh tiredly
"Okay, better get this over with. Where's my Stanley knife?"

>>29276945
The title was misleading. It's the post from that other thread turned into an op.

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>>29275906
"Hurry along? Celly, you're asking for some capital renovations here! It will take days to do all those things!"
>She smiles coyly.
>"Better start right away then."
>She turns around and swaying her hips walks to the door.
>Suddenly, she turns her head back to you and winks.
>Then she moves her tail to the side, showing you the prize and winks again in completely different way, before walking out and closing the door behind.
>U-unf.
>You stand in the hallway of your house, vacuum cleaner in hand and diamond-hard boner in your pants.

>You are Anon, one and only Equestrias resident human.
>After appearing in the middle of Canterlot and causing a commotion, you were subdued by guards and brought before their horse princess.
>Not like you were a wimp that couldn't take on few cute marshmallow ponies, You totally could!
>But having a dozen or so spears pointed at you at all times told you that being aggressive could end with you getting a sharp end of the stick.
>In your guts. Not nice image.
>After being brought before tall, white horse with pastel rainbow mane and a crown on her head, you played 20 questions with her and being deemed harmless and lost, pretty princess pony decided to keep you close to her.
>She provided you a nice one-story house and modest monthly salary on the excuse of you being an ambassador of your species.
>Time passed by, days turned to weeks, which turned to months and years.
>Over the time, you and Princess Celestia grown close.
>Your monthly reports became weekly visits, you started talking about Earth and Equestria, their similarities and differences, and after a while drifted to more personal matters.
>Being an outsider compelled Celestia to open herself to you about things she couldn't talk with one of her ponies.
>About six months ago, you admitted your attraction to her.
>Well, more like you dropped your spaghetti after she decided to drill you about an offside comment you made.
>From that point, your relationship grown.

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>>29279261

>A bit slower than you would like, but you don't complain.
>It was worth it.
>Not everyone can say they had a ruler of their nation give them an under-the-table hoofjob in a public restaurant during one of their dates. You can.
>And any pony who could say that too, is long dead.
>When you're alive for thousands of years, things can get rather lonely.
>Celestia had many publicly known lovers over her lifespan, last one expired about 500 years ago.
>So all in all you could say you were a pretty lucky guy.
>General public took the news that their princess begun dating a hairless ape from another dimension surprisingly well.
>When there are about dozen of different intelligent species on the planet, inter-species relationships aren't a big deal.
>Not very common, but not frowned upon either, at least not by ponies.

>About a week ago you wanted to take things with Celestia to next level.
>To have an actual, human on pony action.
>She met you with a shit-eating grin.
>"Nope! Not before we live together!"
>Too bad house she gave you years ago wasn't in living conditions anymore, at least not by pony standards.
>Your neet altitude sadly carried over to the horseland.
>And being provided living expenses didn't exactly motivate you to get out much, unless you either were to meet Celly, go buy groceries, or on rare occasions grown restless and decided it was time to move your ass from the computer and take a walk or do something else in the open air.

>Your house was nice, but it was more space than you would ever need.
>Ground floor: hall with stairs, spacious Living/Sun room, medium guestroom, medium bathroom with tiny shitter cubicle inside, tiny supply closet and additional doors leading to your backyard.
>Upper floor: your Sleeping/Computer room, small kitchen, small balcony overlooking the front of the house.
>Attic: One single huge unused space.
>Basement: Two medium connected rooms.
>Yard: small front yard and big backyard with a porch.

>>29279274

>Yeah you used, like, three of those rooms.
>But oh well, you had all this excess space.
>And the bigger the space given, the more mess accumulates in it.
>And now Your marefriend wants you to clean and fix it all up.
>You sigh in defeat.
>You know that sooner or later it would come to this.
>Its the price you pay for a stable relationship.
>Heh, 'stable'.
>You know, because you're dating a horse.
>Hehe, I hate myself.
>Few next days are going to be tiring.

============================
Is it to your liking?
Are you entertained?
Continue?

>>29279289
>Continue?
Yes, but don't forget to get rid of the mouse in the attic that isn't into traps.

>>29278953
I'm sorry, but as much as I enjoy some good green, especially with the prospect of tapping Sunbutt in the cards, I really can't get behind this concept.

It sounds too much like Anon is a slave to Celestia's OCD.

Like, no way am I tackling re-finishing wood or replacing a floor without either the gf or bro and a case of beer there to assist, even if they're 90% moral support.

DESU, any girl who wants to tackle a major weekend project (let alone several of them) had better be willing to be there with me for it, and not just ordering me around.

Man up, Anon, and find a mare that respects you and wants to invest time together if she wants something done.

>>29279289

>You scan over the list Celly gave you one more time, trying to find a method to this madness.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Dust the mantelpiece, paintings, shelves, window-sills, television, lights, counter & table tops.
Clean the mirror in bathroom. (Toothpaste belongs on your teeth, silly.)
Clear out and tidy the spare guestroom.
Mop the ground floor hallway leading into the back garden.
Fix the loose floor tiles in the bathroom.
Fix the stiff heater switch in the living room.
Re-finish the wood paneling along the staircase.
Remove those odd stains underneath the computer desk.
Put your weights away somewhere that isn't just the middle of the living room.
Put your guns away.
Remove the dead plants from the garden.
Shampoo the carpets.
Fix the crack in the plaster along the ground floor hallway.
Remove the mouse from the attic.
Fix the squeaky floorboards.
Replace the upstairs kitchen floor.
Mow the lawn.
Paint the porch.
Change light bulb in the basement.
Fix uneven steps in the basement.
Sort things in the basement.
Fix the balcony railing.
Unclog sink and wash the dishes.
Clean the windows.
Trim the hedge.
Trim the dead tree branches.
Paint the gutter.
Remove toilet stains.
Wash the drapes.
Fix the mailbox.
Seal drafty guestroom window.
Clean the grill.
Get a queen-sized bed and a new mattress.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

>Its twice as long as you initially thought it was.
"Urgh, lets start with something simple that wont result in an even bigger mess to clean up."
>You look at the clock in your living room.
>Its 4PM.
>So little time and so much to do.
>Too late for any shopping trip or long outdoor activities.
>Not much of any cleaning supplies in the house either.
>You will have to make due with that you have today.

=================================
If any of you guys think of other interesting things that should be done around the house, just post them ideas.

>>29279718
>Sort the kitchen cupboards and throw away anything that's expired.
>Pressure wash the patio.
>Replace the ruberoid on the extension roof.

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>>29278522
That could be in a story too

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>>29278953
>>29279261
>tfw I wanna read the fresh green but I have an interview that I need to leave for literally right now

I'll check it out when I get back thanks for the green at all though

>>29278522
>putting the pussy on a pedestal and bending over backwards just for the opportunity to be close to a vagina
Yeah, but it's basically a demigod's vagina, and getting close to it and intimately ingratiating yourself with it means you'd be regarded as being a very powerful and influential individual within the country. Basically you could fuck your way to power as Celestia's consort.

>>29279718
>If any of you guys think of other interesting things that should be done around the house, just post them ideas.
I have one. Possibly the shittiest, most uncomfortable DIY a man can be forced to endure. Replacing the fibreglass loft insulation.

>>29278522
>implying women

>>29279947
>caring more about power than pussy
sex is the end not the means to an end

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>>29279289
Good writing skills (I can't green to save my life) but I feel like the setting is off, it shouldn't be that we already have a thing going with her and the cleaning is just an extension of the relationship, it should be we know her and so far its been platonic

I feel like >>29278953
>>29278959
Is more in the ballpark

Maybe you do what >>29278522 suggested while the other writefriend does the original prompt?

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>>29279718
>But what DO you have?
>You go to the supply closet under the stairs to the upper floor and oped the door.
>A bucket and a mop, along with some long broom, short broom&dustpan combo and some chemical cleaning products along the shelves.
"Oh, hey, some light bulbs."
>You reach and grab them from the shelf.
>The moment you manage to take a spare light bulb in your hand, you see a movement.
>Three or four spiders the size of a pocket watch scuttle from the place the light bulb was and with lightning speed only available to ones like them, they start to crawl along the walls.
"Waahh!"
>Releasing your battle cry suspiciously resembling the scream of a little filly, you drop the bulb and jump out off the closet.
>Sound of shattering light bulb is accompanied by the thunder of you slamming the door shut.
>As you look at the closed closet, a shiver runs down your spine.
>Why it had to be spiders.
>You look at the list again, eliminating anything that requires chemical cleaning, outdoors or the use of mop and broom.
>Weights.
>Its not like you used them much.
>You bought them on the impulse, a New Year resolution to better yourself.
>Exercised for like two weeks and stopped.
>You used them to weight down something you were gluing together about two months ago and they stayed there ever since.
>Now, where to put them?
>Why, basement of course!
>Whats that?
>You need to sort things in the basement too?
>Stuffing unwanted things down there is only gonna backfire when its time to clean it up?
>Meh, its gonna be time for that later.
>You grab few weighted plates, stacking them one onto another.
"Heve-ho!"
>You lift them and sway.
"Woah!"
>Almost falling on your back, you manage to regain footing and stay upright.
>You slowly make your way to the basement entrance.
>After fumbling around for a few seconds, you manage to open the door with your elbow.
>You gaze into the darkness.
>You would facepalm if not for weighted plates in your hands.
"Right, the light bulb."

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>>29280876

>You carefully lay down the plates and open a drawer in the hallway dresser, looking for a flashlight.
>You light it up, grab it in your teeth, pick up the plates and make your way down the stairs.
>Faintly you remember an old news story about a thief that fell face first from the roof with a long flashlight held in his mouth.
>Pretty bad way to go.
>You carefully take a note to how steps go.
>Yeah, major health hazard, you should do something about them.
>But that comes later.
>You unceremoniously drop weights at the bottom of the stairs.
>Shining flashlight across the basement you take a look at whats in store.
>The rest of weights, some plant pots and pot-dirt, various metal bits and pieces, some old wooden boards and various other junk, most of it from previous house owners.
>You didn't even bother going through it.
>You peek over the garbage to the next room.
>A furnace and boiler for heaters around the house.
>It was in working condition last time you remember.
>Too bad junk blocked way to it.
>Its fine tho, you liked the fireplace in the living room better.
>Maybe less convenient, but way more comfy.
>After making your way back up, you pull out the list.
Put your weights away somewhere that isn't just the middle of the living room.
>Nice.
>You decide to take a look at the attic.
>After making your way upstairs, you pull down the ramp from the ceiling and ascend right under the roof.
>A whole lot of cartoon boxes meet your eyes.
>Not much besides that tho.
>No mouse in sight either.
>Oh well, the fact that you don't see one doesn't mean there isn't one, its a land of magic after all.
>You ponder how to get rid of unseen pest.
>Lets go for the oldest trick in the book.
>You go back down to the kitchen and check the refrigerator.
"Where is it?"
>After a bit of snooping around inside, you find what you were looking for.
>A piece of old Gouda with mold all over it.
>Perfect.

>>29280912

>Smiling to yourself at the sight of expired food in your hand, you close the fridge.
>You cut off a small piece and throw the rest into the bin under the kitchen sink.
>Grabbing a piece of wood and a string along the way, you head back up.
>Time to get crafty!
>You tie one end of the string to fossilized cheese and the other end to the stick.
>Then you take one of those empty carton boxes, open it up, turn it upside down and set it on the stick.
>When mouse takes the bait, it will pull the stick from under the box, making it fall and trap itself!
>Its foolproof!
>Happy with yourself, you pull out the list.
Remove the mouse from the attic.
>Satisfied with your progress for today, you go check the time.
>5:30PM
>This ain't a race, you can take your time.
>You go down to your room and turn on your PC.
>How lucky that is was one of few things that got through inter-dimensional vortex that opened up in your room back on Earth in one piece.
>This sucker just popper our of nowhere, got you and about half of junk in your room and spit you out in the middle of Canterlot.
>Celestia said it was due to some kind of wild magic overflow or something.
>Anyway, monitor was busted, but luckily main case with everything inside survived.
>You had to play around to get it to work with ponetech crt tv, but after that you had fully functional computer for your own use.
>A bit blurry, but functional.
>Who would have thought that this redundant cinch output on your video card will come in handy.
>And whats even better, one of Celestias students somehow managed magically boost your Wi-Fi card to get an internet connection!
>Yeah, it was a really shit one, loading single page for a three minutes and loosing signal 20 times a day, but just the fact you wouldn't be completely cut from your world meant a whole lot to you.
>From time to time Celly asks you to download some info about how stuff from your world works, you don't really mind.

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>>29280970

>Anyway, the door is locked, the lights are off, it's Anons shitposting time!
>You browse long into the night and fall asleep way past the midnight.
>Just like in good old times.
===========================================

Thats everything for now, more tomorrow.
>>29280528
>Good writing skills
If you say so.
Its my first attempt at green, glad its not too bad.
> setting is off, it shouldn't be that we already have a thing going with her and the cleaning is just an extension of the relationship, it should be we know her and so far its been platonic
Well, in OP Anon wants to snuggle and fuck Celestia and she seems fine with it if he jumps throu her hoops like a good hampster, not very platonic in my eyes.
I think Ill keep theme as it is and see where and how it goes. Kinda set my mind on the plot that will involve Anon trying and failing to fix stuff more than interaction with Celly. Any and all lewds will be more of a bonus from time to time than a staple.
Sorry to disappoint.

>>29281041
I'm loving this so far.

>>29280970
jesus, anon is such a little bitch boy. And all for rotting, aging pussy.

>>29281041
>my first attempt at green
Watch out for recurring themes in your own work. Pretty good so far, I'm edged so hard for celestia's flanks.

>>29281041
I was kind of thinking motherly figure trying to get him to get his shit straight kind of deal

Selfbump.

B00000000000000000mp!

>>29282825
self bump my ass im the op

>>29283571
and I'm sure you are very proud

.pmuB