Rainbow Dash challenges you to a fight, right here right now.

>>29197189
Kick her on her crusty cunt

>>29197189
>Rape

>>29197189
Pin her in a grapple, hold her flailing limbs just long enough to kiss her on the lips.

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>>29197218
this
I'd absolutely lose to her in a fight. Not only does she have built in weapons on her legs, but she's clearly stronger than I am, she can fly, and she's probably more nimble. I wouldn't even want to fight her either way.

>>29197189
>How do you win?
i dont
even with a weapon if i missed with my first attack i would be defeated shes just to fucking fast

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>>29197189
Well the downside is she knows some martial arts, but by the looks of it, she focused on learning more of the punching and kicking instead of the actual grapples which I don't think work very well between ponies for the most part. Back hooves are the most dangerous part of her, so you must stay clear of them. Also by how they deal with injuries, she can take quite a large hit and recover quickly, so it leaves you at a distinct advantage.

Her weakness is her hotheadedness. You want her to face towards you for as long as possible. Taunting is a legit tactic to get her to come at you full front without a plan. Because she's a pegasus, she's probably quite lightweight and needs momentum to do real damage, so close range where you're on top of her to keep her flying and she can't maneuver is the best bet.

Weak spots would be the large eyes, ears, muzzle, and neck. Her wings are deceivingly strong so you have to be careful around them, but they don't seem to respond well to too much weight pinning them down. If you can get over her you can choke her out with a two-armed grab and pinning a wing by kneeling on it with one of your legs as your best bet, and you actually don't have to worry about snapping her neck because of how flexible and hardy it is. The windpipe is a different story, however.

tl;dr, call her slow and say her head's so full of clouds that a headbutt probably feels like being pelted by marshmallows. She charges you, and you side-step the last second, reach left arm around neck and lock hands with your right arm, jump on her back, kneel on her wings, and pull. She'll either end up tapping out or passing out.

Learning a lot of minimal effort self-defense tactics is useful sometimes.

>>29197189
Humans are grapplers. Grappling is easy win. Some improvised joint lock would work just fine.
>>29197786
Also this.

>>29197189
Seeing that she beat Starscream, I wouldn't have much of a chance

I'd kick some dirt in her eyes, do a 360 and run

>>29197819
>I'd kick some dirt in her eyes, do a 360 and run
And get fucked up by her in 10 seconds flat.

>>29197335
>having rainbow dash as your raifu

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>>29197976
>Not having aplejack as your Raifu

>>29197192
Be careful, shit's acidic

>>29197189
She's a 2 foot tall poni. I accidentally step on her like I'm Godzilla and she dies.

>>29197189
>Grab her
>blow raspberries on her belly till she quits
And then sex

>>29197189
Play it defensively at first, wait for her to drop her guard, and then proceed to tackle and brutalize.

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>>29197189
>no weapons (you cheater). You're not carrying any
Are you implying I ever leave my house without pocket sand?

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>>29198977
Dammit Dale, get off the Internet.

>>29197189
I was born with a gun as a hand

Can I choose the environment?

>>29199074
No. It takes place in a kiddie pool full of vegetable oil.

>>29197189
>"Hey Rainbow, let's make this more interesting, whoever wins can >rape the loser. The loser will do anything the winner wants. Anything. Do you accept, or are you chicken?"
And then I'd lose on purpose like 2 seconds later.

>>29197189
I'll wrestle her down and what >>29197209 said

>>29199074
It's the cold vacuum of space

>>29199100
Both of us die in seconds

>>29197189
I don't.
I do what a male should do in a conflict with a female and let her walk all over me until she's satisfied, claiming whatever prize she desires.
Like cleaning the crust off her cunt with my face and laughing about it.

Yes, but only if we do it in a ring or cage, altitude and depth relative to radius, ring out is immediate forfeit.

>>29198977
Actually, thrown sand or dirt would probably be extra effective since hoers doesn't have fingers to pick out grains properly

>>29199222
They also have huge eyes. Pocket sand for the win!

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>>29197189
CQC
Unarmed, I would never lose. The ultimate defense which opens up opportunities for the ultimate offense. It's unbeatable. Rainbow cunt is going down.

>>29197189
Fart in her general direction

>>29197189
Put my dick in her.

>>29197189
Tickle hooves.

>>29197189
She's a very little pony; I could just pick her up and there would be nothing she can do.

>>29197189
I would pull her mane out of her head after breaking her wings and kick her in the teats.

>>29197189
>anthing goes
>no wepons