Satyr Abomination Thread #194: Christmas Tradition Edition

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Mal!

>>29078916
figures. Someone slept with Nyx, and her Daughter has the wrong fucking pussy. Disgusted af. Will her reign of shitposting never end?

What kind of presents do you buy for your satyr kid?

>>29079140
>wrong pussy
>Implying
It's variable, you know that. And just ignore the fucking Nyxfag shitposter.

>>29078916
I would bully that satyr relentlessly.
It would border on criminal harassment.

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>>29079140
>>29079180
>>29079192
Just one thread ago you all wanted to either bang or take care of her.

>>29079200
Bullying is clearly her fetish.
When she breaks down and begs me to stop, I'll offer her her very own collar.

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>>29079180
>What kind of presents do you buy for your satyr kid?
A bow.

>>29079200
I wanted to have anal with her personally until she shits.

>>29079327
>Not while she shits.

>Turning it into anal and shitting fetishes
Can you just fucking stop?

>>29079384
>2 posts
That easy to trigger you? Seriously, get the stick out of your ass. Besides, they were probably joking. LIKE 4CHAN DOES. Or did you think all the unzip dick and diaper in fogs posts were serious?

>>29079384
I agree it was pretty Shitty, but don't be so anally devestated. It's just a little fun between butt buddies you piece of crap. Dookie.

>>29079406
>they were probably joking.
In a general where we got so many people obsessed with sexual fetishes that we had to make a second thread for them, it's hard to tell when it's just a joke anymore sometimes.

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Name something these two want for Christmas/Hearths warming eve

>>29079475
A partridge in a pear tree

>>29079475
A snuggie.
They heard tale of it from their father's homeland, as seen on the strange "tee vee" device.

>>29079475
Their own rooms. That treehouse Fluttershy lives in looks too small for a family to live in.

>>29079475
Recognition.

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>>29079512
This too. Shy's a bab machine.

>>29079475
Who?

>>29079475
I'll be honest, I keep forgetting which one's which with these two.

>>29079512
Every living being is entitled to the right to masturbate in privacy and peace. It says so right there on page one of the Equestrian constitution.

>>29079579
There are way to many Flutter kids. And it always seems like a new one gets added each year. They trying to beat out the Duggars?

>>29079180
>Alex
A portable chess set, and some money to buy other stuff. She has a secret love of books

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I remember someone said they made a colour request in the draw thread on /tg/, so I went there to see how it was going.
The artist finished it.

>>29079863
that looks damn fine. Hope that anon gets it.

>>29079579
Flora is the nerd. Fauna is the one with actual character and personality.

>>29080013
>Fauna has personality
why didn't you say what that personality is?

>>29079475
Fauna: A flyball uniform and helmet

Flora: The last part in the series of "The mating and reproductive behaviors of Equestrian wildlife and sentient plants"; because SOMEONE FUCKING DESTROYED THE LIBRARY BEFORE SHE COULD GET THE LAST EXISTING COPY. Fucking Kyra.

>>29079512
Or this.

>>29079832
The most true thing said in 2016z

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MERRY CRUMBO
also
my two bits on the whole petunia thing in /sad/
It's cool for people to draw the same character different.
I just happen to like to draw her with udders. I'm sorry.

>>29080017
Genki girl who enjoys aminals and sports. Also might be an aspiring bull/manticore rider. Also very cute, but the genki kind of implies that.

>>29079852
>A portable chess set,
Would she even be able to open that present in front of her mom?
Now I made myself a little depressed by thinking that Gilda would either drag you to another room for a talk, or throw that chess set out the door while screaming that she did not raise a nerd.

>>29080033
>The pic
HA! Oh Melody, you cutie. Never stop trying.

>The post
Never be sorry. People have bitched off content creators before "just cause". Don't let them make you feel bad for drawing something you like. Especially when others enjoy it too.

>>29080033
what order are they speaking in? i feel dumb.

>>29080070
highest to lowest.

>>29080033
Cute pic.
>>29080042
>just cause
Do I have to repeat it again? Udders are vulgar on bipedal beings who are not 100% pure cow. There is a reason why Milky Way is gone from /mlp/.

>>29080096
That's like...your opinion dude.I think udders are cute.

>>29080108
Yo. Cows are adorable in general.

>>29080108
>Opinion
If you don't know who Milky Way is and why she's banned from /mlp/, then just say it.

>>29080137
Milky Way WAS banned because this is a blue board. Milky Way literally was crotch tits. Udders are not crotch tits. Not only that. Milky Way was way to sexual for this board to begin with.

If you have to blur it out on tv it's not allowed on a multicolored pony blue board.
Tits have to be blurred.
Udders don't.

>>29080037
>Would she even be able to open that present in front of her mom?
Of course she would.

>or throw that chess set out the door while screaming that she did not raise a nerd.
Despite Gilda being a total bitch in the show the first run, I like to think that she would mellow out as she got a bit older and had a child. Sure she does the occasional over the top parent acting and ironically poke fun at how she used to be a 2tuff4u bitch but she wouldnt take it out on her child. She may not get or understand her hobbies,

>>29080108
>>29080150

Dont reply to people like him, all they do is just drag you down and kill the fun in the thread. They know they dont have a leg to stand on which is why they only scream about things they dont like and thats it. Dont feed people like him. Its not worth it.

>>29080033
Cuties the lot of them. Also intense starring contest if they are doing it out in the cold. Its like the Alaskan Ear Pull.

>>29080150
>>29080160
If it was a pure cow we were talking about, then yeah, it'd be cool since it's a cow an all that. But right now we are talking about a satyr - a halfbreed who is part human. She already has a pair of breasts. Fat udders dangling between her legs just looks vulgar and like a fetish thing.
Oh, and one last thing. No matter what your opinion is on udders on a biped, it's the ones who rules this place that ultimately calls the shots. Just ask that dude who said he got a warning for posting Petunia with udders here, or that guy in the previous thread who had his comic removed.
I'm going to stop now.

>>29080033
Different strokes for different folks.
It matters little to me because, even if something is only tangentially related to horse, I lose all lewd interest. Doesn't mean I can't still appreciate picture someone put time and effort into.

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>>29080164
>Despite Gilda being a total bitch in the show the first run, I like to think that she would mellow out as she got a bit older and had a child.
She was a bit calmer in The Lost Treasure of Griffonstone, wasn't she? Or am I remembering that episode wrong? Been a while since I watched it.

>>29080372
She mellowed out some, but was all lesbian over that one cutie gryphon. To me that showed she was trying to improve herself, at least a little bit.

>>29080033
>Somebody fucked Crackle
Okay this is just goddamn ridiculous. Crackle? Seriously?! Anon needs his balls cut off. My god!

>>29080150
He's baiting or an asshole. Either way, not worth your time

>>29080379
Do you imagine any of the others changed a little as well when they got married and became parents?
>Rainbow Dash cooled down with the stunt flying a bit after she nearly got into a serious accident and had a "what if" moment right after
>What if she died?
>Normally she would just brush off such thinking, but now it lingered on in her head and refused to leave
>Things are different now. Dash has a baby to worry about
>What if her husband and little Icarus got left all alone without her?

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>>29080479
She can clean up alright.

>>29079863
Damn, that looks legit. Although the sword color's bothering me a bit. And the fact that her toe claws aren't shredding those sneakers through. And her unf-tastic thighs. How'd this get past /teeg/ anyway? Are we still doing that Winter Ball thing?

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>>29080787
It got past /tg/ because it was just a generic weebish half-dragon drawing. They love them their monstergrills.

>>29080824
>That pic
My boner rises. And im pretty sure that is mimic. Love how he draws his ladies.

>>29080824
Holy FUCK! LOVELY HARPY ASS!

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>>29080846
It is.

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>>29080824
Mimic draws some great monster grills

>>29080863
Don't make me break out my Papi pics.

>>29080876
I've got a ton of Pickle-Pee pics as well.

>>29079863
Very nice!

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>>29080876
Let's not get TOO off-topic here.

>>29080874
That's a qt tiger satyr.

>>29080891
>>29080886
I want Pickle-Pee to pee on my pickle.

>>29080900
We've got a cat satyr too, sort of. The most recent pic of her is NSFW so I could only link it in /sad/.

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>>29080900
She's of good stock.
I'm the guy who requested her.

>>29080917
Oh, it's supposed to be Katt from Breath of Fire 2?
Or her daughter?

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>>29080926
Nah, just a calico Katt-girl.
I also requested the palm-top Harpies. And this.

>>29080939
There's a bit of lewd art of her floating around somewhere. Good taste. Pretty hot.

>>29080939
She's a cutie.

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>>29080116

Does Melody ever wish to have a different hairstyle?
Has Presto ever taken a day out to take her to the spa and just tell her about how beautiful she is after?

>>29081866
you could have left it at the first sentence. i'm sure satyrs can have their own day-to-day adventures without it having to be all about shipping.

>>29081866
Yeah. She once cut her own her, it was less than stellar.

Nah, I don't ship 'em.

>>29081866
Maybe? Not like she can see it.

Dude took her to the Grand Galloping Gala in a story. I'm sure he's taken her to the spa.

>>29082012
Dude is probably fishing to see if the thread will bitch at the idea for a story. I know the thread's killed my willingness to write for it that way. If that IS the case; Aaron, just write what you want. Some people will like it. Even if the majority bitches about it, you are bound to please the few here who aren't easily assblasted

>>29082032
>>29081866
>Melody gets sick of the hair her mom had been growing out since she was a child.
>"If I can't see it, what's even the point?"
>She sneaks scissors and locks herself into the bathroom until satisfied with a patchy cut just below her ears.
>Her family is horrified at it, but try to sound happy to not hurt her feelings.

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I want to talk about Thorn with a symbiote. I'm thinking about how what her's would look like. Maybe using darker versions of her mom's colors and having the butterfly instead of the spider.

Also what would she would do with it?

>>29082095
I don't know anything about it, can't help you mate.

>>29082095
Reach objects on tall shelves? Symbiotes can do that, right?

>>29082171
With webbing, yeah.

>>29082095
I imagined she would have a symbiot that came from a cursed tree, basically sentient maple syrup. Maybe a dark brown? She could have a leaf on her chest. Or something like that. As for what, she would use it to pin down those who would disrespect the forest. Or something like that.

>>29079475
>Lemon cake
... I want cake now

Was Thistle a live birth or did she come out as an egg first?

>>29082714
Like that thing in Fernhully?

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>>29083845
I'd say live birth. Spike is the father, but her mother was definitely human. So she would lack the piping to lay an egg. My HC anyway

>>29083867
Yeah, more or less.

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>>29081866
Doubt it. Being blind, she'd probably care more about keeping it clean and smelling fresh than worry about how it looks. A shower and a hair brushing and an honest comment from her sisters, parents, or boyfriend is all she needs on a normal day.
>Has Presto ever taken a day out to take her to the spa and just tell her about how beautiful she is after?
I like to think so. Even though Melody is blind, she will still want to look as pretty as possible for special events, like a birthday party or going to the Gala with Presto.

Who are the top five satyrs in general?
I don't mean your five favorites, I mean which five satyrs are the ones that get the most discussion, art, stories, etc?
I want to draw a group Christmas pic of the top five.
Or maybe I should just do a Christmas pic of just the mane 6 satyrs...?

>>29084044
Might want to be specific. Discussion, Art, and Stories are very different thing. Also, to avoid ass hurting/bitching/complaints/anything negative, I would say go with just doing the m6 babus. If you have the balls to still try the top five, yeah, specific category would be better.

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>>29084044
Hard to say. I'm guessing Hope, Yuzu, Darcy, Pogo, and Broil?
>Or maybe I should just do a Christmas pic of just the mane 6 satyrs...?
I think maybe you should just do that. Question is then, are you going with all of the Mane 6 kids? Or only the first ones who were created? Would be nice to see a proper group photo of the very first M6 satyrs.
>Pogo
>Glimmer
>Cider
>Ivy
>Garret
>Icarus

>>29084076
>All
With the amout of Shy, Apple, and Pie kids? You crazy?

>>29084076
I wouldn't put Broil in the top 5 desu.

>>29084044
Just go with m6. Hard criteria. Objective criteria. Subjective criteria has a bad habit of starting shit storms.

>>29084223
Ditto. If any drake should be in the five it's Thistle.

>>29085352
Oh totally. I'd put Mistake there in here place. But everyone agrees that he should just do a group photo of the first M6 satyrs to avoid any salt.

>>29085371
Don't forget Hope.

>>29085371
I think there's like 10 that can be in the top five with the exception of Hope who should stay 1.

>>29084952
Who's that pokemon?

>>29084044
>Mane 6 Satyrs
Its disingenuous to use them when we barely talk about them. As for the most talked about, I think its fair to say.

>Hope
>Laika
>Broil
>Alex
>Gumdrop

But if you want mane 6. Maybe do one of the other siblings.

>Rory
>Prism
>Garrets Sister I forget her name
>Fiddle or Faddle
>Peach
>One of the 1000 flutter kids

>>29085597
Broil is not talked about as much as you think. Where on Earth are you getting her from?

Garret's sister is Sapphire and Peach is Applebloom's kid.

>>29085597
Why does Fluttershy even have so many kids anyway? Too meek to ask Anon to stop?

>>29085623
>implying it isn't just because she enjoys the feeling of motherhood
When they grow up and move out she's going to suffer Empty Nest syndrome so goddamn hard.

>>29085634
>she's going to suffer Empty Nest syndrome so goddamn hard
Time to make more then.

>>29085597
>Its disingenuous to use them when we barely talk about them.
>Maybe use these satyrs almost nobody cares about instead
My vote still stays for the very first M6 satyrs. Plus maybe Hope. At least everyone knows who they are, and we used to talk about how there should be a pic of all of them together a long time ago.

>>29085653
>Maybe use these satyrs almost nobody cares about instead
>

I know you're salty that those satyrs are popular and you hate them, but its delusional to say that nobody talks, draw or writes for those satyrs. They get mentioned and talked about an awful lot.

>>29085671
>Fiddle and Faddle
>Peach
>Popular and mentioned an awful lot
>Has barely been mentioned two times in the past 10 threads
>Some have even said that they ignore everything about them
You didn't know what Garret's sister's name was, and you didn't even know who Peach's mother is, dude. There is no need to get all salty and claim I said shit like "I hate them" because of this.

>>29078916
I would hug her fite me

>>29085739
>Cherry picking a secondary list for the mane six route completely separate from the first list that i was talking about.

I know you think you're being clever by doing this but you just cut your little troll game short cause now i know for sure you're just trolling. And im done replying to you.

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>>29085773
>Implying I was trolling
Are you a moron or something? Either way, the people have spoken, and they'd prefer the very first M6 satyrs. Now it's all up to the artist which ones he chooses to draw.

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>>29080917
Best character in BoF 2.

I wish we had more art of satyrs in video games.
Let's pretend that an artist came here and was in the mood to draw a crossover thing. What would you guys have loved to see?

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>>29086057
Gundam.

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>>29086057
Candy Cammy.

>>29086057
Dude, Tekken

>>29086057
Dragon Knight Broil & Simmer from FF9

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>>29086057
Melody gets fallout style cybernetic eyes.

>>29086144
>What are those ? hooves !! where do you think we are...in a glue factory ! Hope the lobotomite don't start excreting all over the lab floor.
>6 tell me why the lobotomite is have hoove and not those tiny penis feet like the previous one ?
Dala: It look like a cute and huggable teddy bear don't you think ? here i got a bear suit for you little one~
>anyway....tell me why the lobotomite is watching me intensly with his eyes !! it's getting embarassing.

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>>29086057
Too many

Declan Shalvey drawing Sirius or Sweet Dreams in a dream.
Mike del Mundo drawing Thorn in a symbiote suit
Gabrielle del Otto or Greg Capullo drawing Utah with his costume damaged and fighting tooth and nail.
Patrick Gleason drawing Dawn flying
Francis Manapul drawing any of the Unicorn satyrs using magic

>>29088202
uh oh

Who's working on Christmas stuff? Any stories/art? I know mt already posted some stuff.

>>29088896
I wanted to, but cant think of anything atm.

>>29089150
there's a wealth of inspiration out there

>>29089775
Im sure there is, but Im not hit by any.

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>>29091590
>dirt cup
Seriously?

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>>29091598
Eeyup

>>29091598
A) Mudpie is only a SLIGHTLY better name; but on par as an Equestrian name.

B) He's the son of SNAILS. Did you think he was going to get an A tier name? No "Enriquo Montoya Esteban Cilantro Enfuego Maquilla Maquilla Fernando de Soto who is also Italian"s here.

>>29092028
I figured it'd keep in step with the name Mudpie, yeah, it just struck me as especially funny.

I was going to make a Joe Dirt joke.

>>29089150
>>29089786
Is it art or stories you focus on? Maybe we could post a couple of ideas, and hopefully one of them might inspire you to create something? Hopefully. Not saying it's guaranteed to work.

>>29092116
Stories. I wish I was an art friend. Because that is an awesome skill to have.

>>29092134
You shut your face. Being a wordsmith is just as good as being an artist. Better in tandem. How many movies or shows or anything have been ruined by terrible dialogue or story direction? Even if something LOOKS good, a bad choice in words can undo it all. Take pride in your work. A writefag is not lesser than an artfag.

>>29092134
Would you like it if we posted some ideas, see if anything inspires you to write a story?

>The state of the thread at times

https://youtu.be/EfxdbXb8GZo

I worry about you fuckers.

>>29092791
You posted this video at a time where there's nothing going on in the thread? Wouldn't it be better suited in /sad/?

>>29092028

It'd sure be... I don't know, not cool exactly, but interesting maybe if satyrs had two names. An equestrian name and a traditional human name.

I call Radiance's human name as being Brian.

I know, it's just making things more confusing for no reason, but it's something to think about.

>>29092837
>Going to /sad/
I learned my lesson 2 weeks ago. Don't you go to /sad/ unless you wanna feel bad.

>>29093171
Of all the names you could've picked, you picked the name Brian for a prince?

>>29093302
Could be worse, it could be Kevin or Greg.

>>29093385
Or Kyyyle. That's another soft name, Kyle.

>>29093302
>>29093385
>>29093393
What would be a human name for Royalty? Prince Alexander?

>>29093406
Harry.

>>29093411
Keith

>>29093406
Thadius. Or Thad, for short.

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>Not going with Prince

>>29093509
Well, then you get "King, formerly known as Prince". Which is just far too awkward to say.

>>29094742
Poor Margie, so naive, too sweet, too innocent.

>>29093171
His name should be Vince. Nobody would ever mess with him if his name sounded like the kind of name that could grind steel.

>>29094742
Cute rock satyrs.

What would your satyrs do at home when you're stuck at work doing 12 hour shifts til Christmas?

>>29096783
Have sex with their siblings in your bed.

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>>29096783
>>29096821

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>>29096821

>>29096783
Play games for 12 hours straight. Unless my wife is still there to keep an eye on them.

How do we call a male or female satyr a boy/girl or colt/filly ?

>>29096975
Entirely up to you. Maybe humans call them boy/girl, while ponies call them colt/filly.

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>>29096975
Interchangeable with boy/girl, and the naming of their non-human parent.
Kid is always acceptable, even if it might confuse everyone else unless satyr is a goat gal.

>>29097064
i forgot the fucking basket of eggs

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>>29097129
Mera ate all the eggs.

>>29097138
"Mera, did you eat all of Kimmy's eggs?"
>You sternly look at your snek daughter as she has a faint gleam of unhappiness from her bloated, round form.
>"Um..no?"
>Parenting is hard

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Bump from 9.

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>>29097807

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>>29097817
>tfw when goat daughteru pretends to put effort into balancing to not seem like too much of a show off.

>>29097807
This is so cute. Really cute.

>>29097817
Have no idea what's going on but still enjoyable in its own right.

>>29097828
Cute as fuck. You draw Arianna well. It's nice to see her get some cute love.

>>29098394
>Have no idea what's going on but still enjoyable in its own right.
Goat daughter doing goat things, like eating random things with heavy disregard as to whether or not they're properly edible.

>>29098427
Maybe she's got an extra goat stomach hidden away in there capable of digesting grass.

>>29084044
Okay, so I'll do the M6 satyrs, but which rainbow satyr should I use? I remember drawing a female first, but later I believed it was accepted that her firstborn would be Icarus.

>>29098777
Prism would be a best.

>>29098783
Go other siblings with Sapphire, prism, Thorn, Mumble, rory, and one of the apple boys

>>29098806
Yeah. And thistle too cause she is a tiny cutie

>>29098777
I vote Icarus so as to have more males.

>>29098806
Bucky gets no love. Go Bucky.

>>29099228
Let's talk about him then. What makes him different from his siblings other than his laziness?

I don't know why, but I do imagine him as one of the very few people in Ponyville who can make quality moonshine.

>>29098806
Might want to switch one of the girls there with a boy.

>>29099749
Why?

>>29099871
3 and 3, symmetry.

>>29100305
You got to realize something. I want the younger mane 6 satyrs, so Pogo, Garret, and Icarus are out. I also don't like Timber and would much rather have Thorn.

>>29100350
Still say you should go 3:3.

>>29100350
Have to agree with >>29100371
; ir at the very least mix it up so it isn't just "second gen satyrs, oh, except for this one". Maybe replace Mumble with Fiddle or Faddle, or do any of the other m6 have more than 2 kids?

>>29100422
It's kind of hard to not be second gen when 3 out of 6 stop at second gen. I also don't care for Fiddle/Faddle or Flora/Fauna. I could say put Utah in there to mix it up, but I would much rather have Bucky in it.

>>29098777
I say go with Icarus. We used to talk about the very first satyrs having a group photo, man.
>>29100478
>I also don't care for Fiddle/Faddle or Flora/Fauna.
You and me both. I just ignore things with them.

I like the idea of Pinkie having a lot of kids.

Also the idea of Fiddle and Faddle being naughty twin girls is hot

>>29093171
Remember when we called Hope Lydia?

>>29101994
Isn't her full name Hope Lydia Heartstrings?

>>29101994
As far as I recall Hope was Hope from the start.

If you had to choose between waifu or or daughteru, which would you pick assuming that daughteru was against the idea of being both?

>>29102517
As in you have to pick between having a relationship with your wife, or your daughter for whatever reason, and your daughteru isn't interest in her route being a romantic relationship?

>>29102590
Correct, I just felt like typing 'daughteru' because I like the sound of it.

>>29102637
Daughteru. I'm of the belief that a man who abandons his child for personal gain or out of disinterest is no man at all.

>>29102517

>"But dad, you said you'd take me to see the new Star Wars movie this weekend!"
"Sorry kid, but your mother's offered to suck my dick if I put the shelves up in the back bedroom."
>"But... But that's not-"
"Can you match or beat her offer?"
>"Huh?"
"I mean are you willing to offer a blowjob of your own if I take you to the cinema instead?"
>"Eww, no way!"
"Well then I suppose the movie will just have to wait."
>"But I... Okay, what if I get one of my friends to... t-to suck your thingy instead?"

>>29102711
What's her friend going to get out of it, unless she just likes sucking thingys.

>>29102715
The antidote.

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>>29102792

>>29102715
Mistake wants to herd up, she'll take any of your attention she can get.
Yuzu's simply playing coy about the incest till you're balls deep in at least a few of her friends.

>>29102810
>She's watching through a crack in the door
>"Yeah..yeah that's right, fondle his balls with those nails, slut. Better not let a drop of that go to waste."

>>29102517
What situation would you be in where your daughter/son would not be with you? Did they have that big of a fall out with their mother that living together is out or the question? And if so, what situation would it be where you as a father would stand by your wife if she did something that bad? And to answer your question guess have to be a single dad. Single dad anon seems to have fun adventures. >>29102711 >>29102810 >>29102825 apparently.

>>29102902
I thought it was an odd situation to be proposed, too, but I just went with it.

I'd like to think aside from some daughteru loving now and then, most marriages there are strong.
I don't know man, last time I got told to fuck off to /sad/.

>>29102711
"Sweetie, if you had any friends you wouldn't need me to take you to the cinema, you'd just go with them."
>Your daughter holds a finger up as if she's about to refute that, but quickly lowers it and looks down sadly.
>"Oh... yeah, right."

>>29102923
/sad/ aint that bad. And its more the better place to talk about incest, and other lewd happenings. I would recommend bringing that prompt over to /sad/ as well, not in a fuck off way, its just better suited for there. It is a fun prompt in a way, maybe modify it and have some friendly mother daughter rival competition where they compete for your attention and you just want to chill in your man cave.

>>29102969
Wow he's just like my dad when I was her age!
>"You need to get out more, Anon."
>"No I wont give you a ride to your friends house."

So is this what the Satyr General has become? Filled with people who are so obsessed with incest that they must bring it up in every joke and steer almost every topic and discussion prompt towards it?

>>29103067
That's what it was when I left. Nothing's really changed.
Makes it hard to craft up story ideas when the general discussion gets passed over, since you already know what it's about without having to look.

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>>29102976
>tell them you'll have time when it's halftime
>they see the game clock is at 3:00
>"Oh, so all we have to do is wait 3 minutes? Haha, that's easy!"
>yfw 3 football minutes isn't actually 3 minutes irl

>>29103084
Look, im glad a content creator has returned and is giving the thread another chance, but its unfair to the thread that the camp of SFW family feels anons seem to give up so easily when the smallest of lewd content is posted. I get it, we had a big problem with incest and lewd content in the past. Seeing as how we only shared the one thread, but now we have it divided and for the most part its contained in that other thread.

However, if trolls, or dull anons choose to post or reply something lewd or incest related we have no control over that. Rather than get mad and rage quit from the thread, I recommend people start directing them to /sad/ and if they still keep at it then they are just trolls and shitposters wanting to get a rise out of people.

Lets work with this prompt >>29103090 it sounds cute as fuck being so devilish to your family in that they dont know how football works and it could be a good story to work with.

Personally i dont know shit about football so im gonna try and brush up on it and do a short of this myself. But please, do more to add content rather than complain about things we have no control over. Also cute story idea anon. I will do my best to make something of this

>>29102969

>"Okay, I may not have any friends, but what if I use my allowance to hire some bar skank to do it for you? Will you take me to see the movie then?"
"Seeing as some skank's already going to suck my dick, I can't in good conscience have my little girl waste her money hiring another one."
>"Dad, did you just call mom a skank?"
"We'll look at it this way, kiddo. She did offer to give me a blowjob in exchange for putting up some shelves. Does that seem like the kind of thing somebody who isn't a skank would do?"
>Your daughter frowns thoughtfully for a moment before grinning at you.
>"Take me to the cinema or I'll tell mom you called her a skank."
"I... Huh, well shit, you got me. Okay, grab your coat, sprout."

>>29103090
>>29103117
I don't really know much about football either. I don't even know if you're talking about real football or American football.

>>29103122
>"Take me to the cinema or I'll tell mom you called her a skank."
"Sorry kiddo, but that's her fetish. Also, you're grounded now. I didn't raise my child to be a blackmailer."

>>29103134
>real football
This is an AMERICAN image board. Our football is the only football. Everything else is soccer.

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>>29103164
>soccer
You mean that gotdang poverty ball?

>>29102154
That was a bit in a story from years past. I believe the writers name was something to the effect of The_Elated_Fellow, or some bout of general happiness. He did did happy ending for all those stories.
>>29103084
On the money man. Also what have you been up to, it's been a while.

>>29103299
My boyfriend and I broke up after four long, painful years. I finally feel free to enjoy whatever it is I do. Been spending all of this year rekindling my love of life.
Totally back to being a furfag, but I'm mostly kept to myself these days.

>>29103307
>tfw always single
One day I'll have a shitty break up and have had sex. But sorry to hear that. Hope you're doing well

>>29103307
Sorry to hear that, Aaron. But if the relationship was so hard on you, hope you feel better now.

>>29103084
I... feel exactly like this.

>>29103820
I'm going to die right now.
They are SUCH a cute family. I could imagine Sombra playing Santa because FemAnon told him about how happy it made the children.
Could imagine it's the one time a year he actually goes all out as a father.

>>29103307
I hope to you feeling better, I'd hate to sad pal on christmas.
Whatcha got in mind for things satyr wise, if anything?

>>29103829
That idea sounds so damn sweet.

>>29103860
Dunno yet! I may end up writing something about satyr being alone for Christmas, since it's what I'm gonna be experiencing this year for the first time. It might get coupled with a lonely New Year's story as well, but to be honest, I don't want to depress the thread with my personal sadness.
In terms of myself, yeah, I'm feeling a ton better since we broke up. I feel like I can be my own person, like I can't be controlled, like I know how to control such a situation if it ever happens again.
Enough about me though.

>>29103879
Maybe I'll have to make it happen. Short, dead shift at work tonight. We'll see what I can scribble down on some receipt paper.

>>29103889
I feel for ya. Depression or general sadness, that's what this thread helped me with however many years ago now. If anything use it for coping with whatever your feeling. I've lived through enough so I was going to eventually get to drawing out moments from my life with satyr. I was actually able to inspire my own father with my excitement over meeting some people here and telling him of all the worthwhile discussion and debate I've had. Me sounding grownup when trying to discuss raising children really got to him.
What I'm trying to say is this thread has helped so let it help you. You're not alone this christmas, you got me, through satyr.

>>29103889
Aaron, you got a skype or discord?

>>29104050
I actually prefer telegram, but I do have both!
D - Amethyst#8536
S - aaron.amethyst

>>29104077
Awesome. Contact may not be for a bit (life is getting in the way) but expect a response later

>>29104085
Also, for those that might want to be able to find me much easier, Telegram...

@AaronAmethyst

>>29104077
>telegram
Didn't those go out of fashion after WW2?

>>29104195
Considering the joke about Equestria being old tech; would fit.

>>29103164
dog bles ameriga :-DDDDDD

I wrote something incredibly stupid.


This story is brought to you by Horsetess Treats

It was Hearth's Warming Eve and Hope is celebrating the best she can. She decides to go to the middle of Ponyville and help hand out presents to colts and fillies who couldn’t get any this year. She did not go as herself though. She went as his heroic persona, Ms. Equestria, with her amazing powers of magic and speed. Hope did feel like changing her costume for the season. Instead of her usual blue and yellow color scheme, she went with a seasonal green and red.

As she hands out these presents, something evil was afoot in some part of the Everfree. A mysterious figure lurks in a dark, damp cave they call both their home and laboratory. The red centaur known as Tirek yells, “At last, I have created gems that can match the Elements of Harmony. With my Brain of Evil, I can finally take over Equestria and cancel Hearth’s Warming Eve forever. First thing’s first, I must take out Ms. Equestria to make it simpler.” He uses the gems and they start to glow from mystic and dark powers.

“Here you go little Olive,” Hope tells a filly with a smile and handing them a present. Just as she grabs another present, a ray of light appears around her, teleporting to Tirek’s lair. She looks around and sees him. “Welcome Ms. Equestria. The dark element gems I created has just delivered you from Ponyville to my lair. Now we can see how Hearth’s Warming Eve will be like for those children without you.” Hope tries to think of a way to stop his dark elements before he destroys her. There is only one way, a gift she got from Mrs. Cake. She opens one of her pouches and shows a HORSETESS CHOCOLATE SPONGECAKE©.

>>29105652
“Dark Elements, if your power is great as Tirek is, then surely you’ll have great taste and love this delicious treat,” Hope says, launching it to the Dark Elements Tirek is holding in his hand. The cake attaches to the gems like a magnet and their glow starts to dim down instantly. Tirek tries to pry the delicious, cream-filled cake from his gems. “Dark Elements, do as I say and destroy Ms. Equestria!” he yells in anger. Hope rushes to Tirek and gives him a righteous uppercut. “Your Dark Elements refuse to follow your commands. They are enjoying the HORSETESS CHOCOLATE SPONGECAKE©,” Hope says. The Dark Elements are released from their grip, shattering once they hit the ground.

“And now back to my important work handing out presents,” Hope says, leaving his lair and toward back to Ponyville.


2/2

I'll be working on my other two real shorts now.

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>>29105660
I forgot to put pic in either post

>>29104903
That's honestly a good point. Equestria might still have something like them. Probably some sort of magical variation though. Unless it was run by humans from the WW2 era who somehow got stuck in Equestria.

>>29105670
Is this an advertisement or something?

>>29105660
>>29105670
Gave me a chuckle.

>>29103889
>I don't want to depress the thread
But I like sad feels.

>>29107193
>Equestria has humans from several different time periods in it

>>29108374
All I want for christmas is THOSE FLUFFY EARS, BRUH

>>29108564
Why not. An inter-dimensional anomaly doesn't necessarily have to conform to any particular dimension's idea of time and space. It could have sucked in humans from all sorts of time periods.

>somewhere deep in the Arimaspi lands, where no pony has ever set hoof, there lives a tribe of neanderthals

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>>29108577
No touching allowed, pervert.

>>29108586
>berserker's get sent to changeling territory
>feudal samurai end up in griffonia
>so on and so forth
>later arriving humans who believe they're the first to show up find it odd to see monuments similar to ones back home like abu simbel, easter island statues, and nazca lines

How awkward was puberty for satyrs with them being halfsies? Which ones changed the most?

>>29108608
Very possible.

>>29108625
>Dawn and Radiance are on a beach near Equus's equator with their father
>"Dad, what're you doing with that thing? Listening to the sand?"
>'Metal detecting, filly. Your old man can't just sit baking in the sun.'
>"We have innumerable treasure at home already, dad." Radiance says
>'BUT' Their father states with a finger raised
>'We don't haaave THIS!'
>"..That's uh..that's a really neat..thing, dad."
>Anonymous holds high what looks to be a rusted tray
>"Little polish and some all american know-how, I could hang this in my mancave and tell everypony it's a vintage license plate."
>'..Earth thing, dad?'
>"Yep."
>He further chips off some rust and notices what appears to be writing
>"The hell?..'let it be known un...unto all men..Nova Albion..Drake, 1579."

>>29108663
So Equestria is rightful clay of Great Britain? I knew it.

Introducing the new national anthem for the British colony of Equestria. https://youtube.com/watch?v=ct-bU0XqvHI

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I'm tired. Goodnight.

>>29109703
ULTRAAAAAA COMBOOOOOO

Christmas is here
Christmas is here
Satyr's asleep
Holiday cheer

Stick all the presents
Under the bright shiny tree

Wife and kids will not know what hit them

Saint Nick will look like a big scumbag

Christmas is here
Christmas is here
Daddy's awake
Spreading the cheer

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Wq73h6XZQGA&feature=youtu.be
You'll know which parts go where

What's satyr's favorite christmas special

>>29111331
__Star Wars___

>>29111331
Die Hard.
Nightmare Before Christmas.
Gremlins.

>>29111331
Emma loves Tokyo Godfathers.
Hope and Gumdrop watch Rudolph the Red-Nosed Reindeer

>>29111331
The live action how the grinch stole christmas. It's what they used to watch with dear old uncle unon every year before he died. Rip.

>>29111958
Satyr chilling with Uncle Ghostnon when?

It was only a few days until the Flutter family celebrated Hearth’s Warming Eve and Christmas. Thorn had a problem that she has been stalling since the beginning of December and should not being starting now. She hasn’t gotten anyone in her family any gifts. She knows she has very little time. Her mother offered her multiple times to go and shop with her for the rest of the family, but she always told her that she’ll do it on her own later. She hasn’t even looked at everyone lists taped to the fridge.

Thorn gets out of her room and heads downstairs to the fridge. She sees that everyone except her dad has their list up. With having no idea what to get him, she’ll probably just get him some sort of tie or something similar to the puzzles he enjoys such as that one where he tries to get stuff out of a bottle and a rubix cube. Surely, she can find one that he doesn’t already have. Taking all the lists, she tells her mom bye and leaves her house.

Thorn looks outside and sees that it is fairly dark even though it is around 6 due to the days becoming shorter. That means it’s time. She doesn’t remember how long ago, but she remembers being lost in the Everfree and some sort of living sap got stuck on her. It adapted to do whatever comes to mind for her. The only thing this sap doesn’t like fire and Gizmo whenever it shows itself in front of him.

She doesn’t let the sap surround her body to make a sort of “suit” of sorts, for she has no use for it right now. Whenever she gets to wears it, it feels amazing. She feels like she could be faster than a speeding arrow. If she wants, tendrils can come out of the suit. Thorn can use them to grab anything, even swing. Sure, she can fly, but flying is not as cool as swinging using the clouds.

1/?

>>29112044
Thorn flies to downtown Ponyville to get at least one present for her family. ‘Right, Timber, Ivy, and maybe Dad will be easy. Timber has been getting into swimming, so a pair of goggles and trunks with some oil to protect wings from water could be fine. Ivy has been getting ready for vet school, so maybe an animal print scrub.’ She thinks to herself as she flies to the sports store, Velocity. The store has a sign up front saying they are having a “Race Against Time” sale. She rushes into the store to get what she needed. It was swarmed with ponies everywhere grabbing what they could, many of them in the same situation Thorn herself was in. She walks to swimwear and equipment, each step a pony bumping into her.

She does eventually get to where she wanted. Thorn grabs a pair of trunks with a pattern of fish on them and a pair of blue goggles with plenty of others in stock. The last thing Thorn needs for her brother is that oil, but she can’t find it with so many ponies around her. She eventually finds it, but another Pegasus is about to grab the last one in stock. As the Pegasus mare looks away, Thorn realizes this is her only chance. She gets the sap to surround her hand, launches a tendril, grabbing the last bottle of it before the Pegasus can. Thorn holds that bottle with a proud smile on her face as she sees the Pegasus confused, wondering where that bottle went. All she must do is head to the counter and buy what she is holding. She walks to said counter with what she needs close to her. As she walks, Thorn is almost tempted to keep the presents wrapped close to her with the tendrils. She gets to the counter, refuses some sort of membership, and pays for the stuff. She heads out and marks out Timber in her mind.

>>29112049
Next on the list is her dad. She beelines to a store of puzzles and toys called Toymaster’s Collection. She thought Velocity was busy, but this place makes it look like nothing. Fillies and colts with their parents are packed like sardines. She lifts off of the ground and tries to fly steadily, even with the store being full of Pegasus ponies with the same idea as her. ‘What kind of puzzle should I look for?’ Thorn thought to herself. She hates being surrounded by so many ponies. Sometimes she is tempted to just for tendrils from the sap to make the ponies around her to give her space. As she slowly walks toward the puzzles section, she finds two puzzles she doesn’t remember her dad having that will do just fine.

They’re called an Eitan’s twist cube and a bottle where you have to put a replica of Aunt Rarity’s store into it. ‘Marketing has always been weird here’ Thorn thought to herself. The cube looks like a Rubiks, but instead of being a normal cube, it looks like someone grabbed it and twisted it into an odd shape. She grabs both of these puzzles and tries to rush to the counter. She is much less concerned about trying to snatch these. Her dad is pretty much the only person she knows that actually do this as a hobby. She puts the two puzzles down on the counter and gives the stallion the money needed for them, rushing out as soon as she can. Two down, sadly four more to go.

>>29112056

Next two who she can get in one store if she’s lucky is her sister and mom. Much like her dad, her mother almost never made a list for the holidays. All she would ever say, “I’m sure I’ll be happy with whatever you get me.” Thorn always felt like that was a bit of a lie. Her mom is almost as impossible to get stuff that she’ll actually appreciate as uncle Discord. She knows one of the things that always happens is that the animals mom takes care of will sometime just shred the beds made for them apart. It wouldn’t be the worst idea in the world to get a new bed for the animals. Ivy did say she was going to focus on birds. A stuffed bird wouldn’t be the worst idea in the world. She could just put it on her desk when she gets a job or something like that.

The animal and accessory store, The Red, surprisingly had little to no people. Thorn was glad to see that her luck seems to be turning around. She walks around, not having to worry about stepping on anyone hooves. It only took maybe a minute of searching to find a fresh medium animal bed and a stuffed bird, a bluebird to be specific. She purchases them and leaves.

The last two are Flora and Fauna. She looks at their lists and has no idea where to get any of this. She doubts the local bookstore has anything about moths and butterflies lives for Flora and a #80 Mane Broncos or Colts jersey for Fauna. She knows Velocity is the only place that would have a jersey and there wasn’t a single one there. Thorn tilts her head back and takes a breath, knowing that she’s going to have to ask either her parents or Uncle Discord for help and at least her parents will lecture her how she shouldn’t wait until the last minute. Thorn tries to think where in Ponyville she could find those gifts.

>>29112061
Her luck changes for the worse as she hears a mare scream. She looks to see what the cause of the screaming is. A few masked stallions and mares are trying to rob stores and steal from other shoppers. Thorn thinks to herself. ‘Do I really need to get involved?’ She looks at her bags of soon to be presents. Being a helping hand was never her thing. The sap was mainly used for fun more than anything else. Then again, maybe she can get some sort of satisfaction from all of the thank yous she will get. Although, she has just invested at least an hour in doing all of this. Where can she even possibly put this? It’s not like she can let the sap form the suit. Anyone who got a good look at her before and when she changed will notice she’s holding the same bags.

Looking around, she sees the perfect place, just a bathroom. She runs to the it, and shuts the door behind her. Thorn allows the sap to surround her body, forming the suit that lets her feel atop of the world. One of the stranger side effects of the sap whenever it covers is that her tongue gets longer and her teeth sharpen to those of a crocodile. ‘Now what do I do with these?’ She asks herself, bags still in her head. Suddenly, she gets an idea. She places the gifts in the corner of the restroom and shoots a sort of “webbing” at them. The webbing is almost impossible to tear apart. Knowing that the presents are safe, she leaves the restroom, ready to stop the thieves.

“Give me all the bits you have!” the mare yells at one of the store clerks. The mare’s horn glows straight at the clerk as they start to take the money out. As the clerk was about to give them the bits, the mare starts to scream her lungs out. Two tendrils rapped around her legs, dragging her out of the store. The mare tries to get up, but all she sees is some sort of horrifying, dark figure with glowing eyes and sharp teeth looking into her eyes. The mare tries to scream again, but she gets covered in webbing before she could.

>>29112068
“Did ya hear that? Sounded like Ruby,” One of the burglar asks his friend. They were both about to see what is going on with their friend, until something hit them. A fake Hearth’s Warming Eve tree was launched at them. As they both try to get up, the two saw the same figure. Their eyes widen, wondering what in Equestria is standing in front of them until the dark webbing trapped them too.
‘That was the last of them and I think I did less property damage than usual.” Thorn thinks to herself with a smile. This was all and dandy until she remembered that she still needs to find gifts for her twin sisters. What could she possibly do?

“Excuse me,” Thorn hears with a hoof poking at the back of her leg. She looks back and sees a mare and stallion. The mare has shopping bags, one are from the bookstore. The stallion had a bag from Velocity. Both of her bags have exactly what she needs.

“Thank you so much for helping us Ms. uh? What’s your name?” the stallion asks. This never occurred to Thorn. She never thought she would need a name. ‘Think Thorn. What sounds cool’

“Call me…Toxic Oak,” Thorn tells them. She doesn’t it express it, but she thinks that was a terrible name and there’s probably no going back.

“Thank you so much. Is there anything we can repay you?” The stallion asks. Thorn smiles, she can’t believe how lucky she is.

“Yes, there is,” Thorn says, summoning tendrils to point at the jersey and book. They hand the gifts. She can’t believe the odds are. Thorn rushes to the restroom and removes the webbings from the bag and puts her new gifts in the bags, making sure to hide them. She does the last thing she thinks of, hiding the sap. The sap starts to shrink and condense, hiding to where no one can see it. She then grabs her bags and head home with a smile, ready to ask someone else to wrap the gifts up for her.

End

>>29112044
>>29112049
>>29112056
>>29112061
>>29112068
>>29112074
And done with that short. Only one left. Comments are welcomed as always.

>>29112074
>>29112083
I think it'd be funny if no one else thought "Toxic Oak" was a cool name but for some reason Thorn gets stuck with it.

>>29112176
Nevermind, I missed the sentence after she stated the name...

>>29112074
>>29112083
I liked it. A little out of the norm (of what passes for the norm recently), but fun!

>>29111958
>They kinda miss how he would always go on about how ponies butchered that story with their pony version, and how the one from Earth is much better in every way

>>29112661
>"Jim Carrey was a goddamned legend, I tell you! Barely needed the makeup!"
>every year, around his fifth cup of egg nog, he'd start ranting again
>One year he got into a fight with Princess Luna over whether Die Hard was a better Christmas movie than Nightmare Before Christmas
>she had to be bribed with dozens of cookies before peace was restored.

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>>29113348
With wings

>>29113348
>>29113351
Cute! Is this new?

>>29113351
Cute art. It's Mumble and Ivy, right?

>>29112681
>"Jim Carrey was a goddamned legend, I tell you! Barely needed the makeup!"
>Little did anyone know that the satyr's uncle WAS Jim Carrey

>>29114524
>every year she visits 'Uncle Non's' grave and recites lines from Ace Ventura
>"H-hey, Unc'..it's me again. *ahem*..OH. YOU. PRETTY CHITTY BANG BANG WE LOVE YOU."
>"AND OUR. CHITTY CHITTY BANG BANG CHITTY CHITTY BANG BANG LOVES US, TOO."

What would you do if a movie star ended up in Equestria and your kids started to see them as their uncle or aunt?

>>29114820
Tell them it's racist to think I'm related to every other human just because I'm a human, too.

>>29114820
Tell them that guy's a total Chad.

>>29114254
Timber and Mumble. Ivy would be taller.

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>>29112176
I wanted to have a name similar to venom and carnage, so I picked that because of it comes from a tree instead of space. Probably a blunderseed or something.
>>29112579
Thanks. I don't know why, but I feel like the idea of the symbiotes is perfect for Thorn's character.

>>29115065
I like the idea of a symbiote satyr.

>>29113530
Newish. Never posted it here before.

>>29114539
>from beyond the grave, carried by the wind, Satyr hears a faint sound
>"That's Dick Van Dyke you idiot!"

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So how are each satyr family spending Crampus?

>>29117638
They're having an entirely platonic and non-sexual dinner

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Another one of my pics ended up in the wrong dropbox again, Maud instead of Limestone, but let's be fair: It's kind of my own fault that happened given how I characterized Margaret.

>>29118675
Fuck.

I'll fix it.

>>29118691
Rad.

>>29118675
>>29118691
Wait, so the dropbox is still being updated with everything upped?

>>29118695
It is done.

>>29118696
Well it's a new Dropbox that I made. It's updated every few weeks once I get a good collection of pics in the unsorted folder.

>>29119361
I hope she doesn't invoke castle doctrine

>You get sick the day before Christmas.
>What does your satyr do to save the day?

>>29120154
Chicken soup, a hot water bottle and a sympathy blowjob while I lay dying in bed.

>>29120186
>That last part
Take it to /sad/. We christmas comfy atm.

>>29120212
That sounds pretty comfy to me.

>>29120186
>Achy joints and mild migraine may have to disagree with a blowjob, but I appreciate the effort there sport.

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>>29120246
Agreed.

>>29120186

>Momentarily taken aback, your daughter blushes.
>"I, uh... W-Well I guess if it'd make you feel better
>Leaning in, she moves to pull back the bedsheets only to be halted as you sit up slightly and frown at her.
"What the hell are you doing?"
>Her eyes widen and she stammers in embarrassment.
>"Huh? I'm just, you know, giving you a blowjob like you asked."
>You stare at her silently.
>"Oh! Y-You were joking?"
>She laughs nervously.
>"Yeah, me too! Joking that is... about, uh... B-Because I'd never actually, um... do that."
>You cross your arms over your aching chest.
"No, I wasn't joking, I just want the soup and hot water bottle first, genius."
>If you thought she was blushing before, now her face was burning a bright shade of pink as she quickly stands up and hurries out of the room.
>"I'm sorry! I-I'll go get them right away!"
>You lay back against the pillows and sigh.
>You may be sick, but at least you can tease the living shit out of your socially awkward, horny teenage daughter.

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>>29120464
>You may be sick, but at least you can tease the living shit out of your socially awkward, horny teenage daughter.
Sounds like a nice life.

>>29120464
>>29120580

I want to lovingly bully my satyr daughter and gradually undermine her confidence so that she'll never talk to boys and remain pure forever.

>>29120464
unf

>>29120709
>remain pure forever
Except for you, you mean?

>>29120464

>She returns five minutes later with a steaming bowl of soup and a water bottle in hand.
>Laying the former on your bedside table to cool and the latter beside you beneath the covers, she once again sits down upon the bed and leans towards you, slowly drawing back the covers.
"Hey, what're you doing?"
>She looks up at you in confusion.
>"I brought you the things you asked for, so um... should I do the 'other' thing you wanted me to do now?"
>You furrow your brow.
"Huh? What other thing?"
>She hesitates for a moment.
>"Um... you know. You said I should give you a blowj-"
>You interrupt her with a loud cough.
"Dear god! What's wrong with you? I'm your father!"
>She recoils back slightly, her eyes wide like those of a rabbit caught in the headlights of an oncoming car.
>"B-But you said that I-"
>You hold a hand up to silence her.
"I was obviously delirious with fever and mistook you for your mother."
>She once again blushes madly.
>"I'm sorry, I didn't know!"
>A tense moment passes between the two of you as you lie reclining against your pillows.
>You sigh.
"That's okay, sweetie, I know you were just trying to help. You're a good girl."
>She glances away, never having been good at receiving compliments.
>"So, uh, do you want me to feed you your soup or..."
>You shake your head.
"No, you've done enough. You can go play or whatever."
>Nodding, she stands up and begins making her way to the door.
>You let her get about half way before speaking again.
"Oh, sweetheart?"
>She turns back at the sound of your voice.
>Your grin deviously.
"Send in your brother."

>>29120815
No, actual pure. I'm seriously considering not letting her ever have access to the internet for this exact purpose.

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>>29120841
>Send in your brother.

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>>29120841
>>29120846

>>29120876
Her boyfriend must have a really big dick.

>>29120841
>>29120854
>"Send in your brother."

>"Hey, dad. You feeling better?"
"Nah, kiddo, I think I'm dying."
>"Oh... well that sucks."
"Sport, did I ever tell you the old legend about how boipussy is supposed to have miraculous healing properties?"
>"Uh, what? That's kind of an odd question, dad."
"So that's a no then? Good, then I guess I have a surprise for you."
>Just as he's backing away towards the bedroom door, your son hears the latch click into place as it's locked from the outside.
>You smile.
>Your daughter was such a good girl.

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>>29115119
Yeah, but I am going to write to where if a satyr is a cape, they have a shtick the rest don't.

>>29120841
>>29120464

Before anybody says anything, I'm not going to continue this. Or if I do it'll be over in /sad/.

>>29120898
Please continue it in /sad/. It has great potential.

>>29120898
You lured us in with comfy tier daughtercest, then threw us a curve ball with sonfu lust.
Even if I liked gay shit, I wouldn't want you to continue it because you tricked me. You tricked us! Betrayed our trust. You can't be trusted. Can't be trusted not to throw us another curve ball. How would the gaybois know you wouldn't blue ball the half hilt into their son?
Go sit in the corner, and think about what you did.

>>29120911
Was that even the same Anon?
I figured it was one of the trapfags hijacking the story for lulz.

>>29120918
It was all me, but I never intended to imply that actual incest would take place between the dad, daughter or son. I just wanted to have a bored, bedridden Anon tease both his kids equally because a parent shouldn't show favouritism.

If somebody wants to continue it into actual lewd over in /sad/ then be my guest.

In any case, I have to get on with the last of my Christmas wrapping.

>>29120964
>I just wanted to have a bored, bedridden Anon tease both his kids equally because a parent shouldn't show favouritism.
And you couldn't think of a way for Anon to tease and mess with his kids without incest?
I like the idea of a bored and bedridden Anon, but all the incest jokes were just ridiculous. It would be disturbing as hell if your own parents talked to you like that.

>>29120999
Anon has a quirky sense of humor.

>>29120841
I kekd

>>29120999
Right, but this is make believe and deals with the made up offspring of cartoon horses from a show for little girls, which sort of implies some degree of separation from reality and social norms to begin with.

>>29120911
>Aww yeah, more daughter cummies time
>What?
>Ew! Gay shit! You suck!
I really hate this thread sometimes. Mostly the constant hypocrisy, but ruining sweet Christmas times doesn't help.

>>29120999
This. Trips of truth.

>>29121020
>Quirky
You mean he's white trash?

>>29121050
>This argument again
Dude, it's okay to try and defend your fetish, but don't bull shit it. That "well, it's already imaginary so we should just go full fantasy" shit is never okay. Just admit you wanted incest, admit the sole reason was for a boner, and no one can argue that it's bull shit. They may not be happy with it, but they can't at least call you an idiot for trying to hide it.

>/sat/ shits itself again

Any lewd or questionable content really shout be posted in /sad/

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>>29121056
>So busy getting triggered that you can't even recognize an obvious joke post.
Okay.

>>29121098
First /sad/ is supposed to be just for fetishes, now if we move anything that could be construed as being in any way suggestive there, soon there won't be anything left to be posted here.

>>29121098
>Implying
Nobody has even done anything bad, you retard. Don't make a mountain out of a molehill.

>>29121077
>Dude, it's okay to try and defend your fetish, but don't bull shit it.

Well in fairness, I couldn't very well reply to >>29120186 who specifically mentioned a blowjob from "your" satyr without making it about incest.

>>29103067