Royal Guard Mare Thread # 11

FUCK WHITE PEOPLE AND FUCK TRUMP

>>28777316
>first post
>wanting to fuck anything besides a qt poner
>not wanting to be guarded in the night with your pony marefriend bodyguard
For shame.

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>>28777316
thanks for correcting the record

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>>28777269
Shit are those some damn content mares.

>>28777494
And that looks like one scared and confused stallion.

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>>28777699
She's a mare.

>>28770138
>You've done it, Anon.
>Careful's shifted on top of you, looking down into your eyes.
>You're reminded of the first time you got a good look at her, when she clumsily pinned you down in the soft grass of one of the vista parks, mistaking a tourist for an assailant.
>That feels like months ago. Has it really only been a few days?
>On top of you, she feels similar.
>Not quite so heavy, without the neutron-star density armor, but you're reminded she's still an earth pony.
>A lot of muscle and sinew and a lot of soft, cushy fur.
>Maybe a little lighter than what she'd be as a human.
>Maybe one of those wing-poners would be lighter and fluffier, but Careful's earth heritage gives her... substance. Reality.
>Reality you're reminded of as each of your hands caresses her flanks.
>Between which she's carrying a lot of substance.

"I've mentioned you're... well-endowed?"
>"Several times," Careful coos.
"R-really?"
>"Not always verbally. Or consciously."
"... I stare."
>"You stare."
>Smooch.
"So..."
>Careful raises an eyebrow, inviting your question.
"... is it muscle? Bone structure?"
>"And veggie bacon."
>Smooch.
"Anything in particular you'd like?"
>"Haunches like massages."

>>28777940
U-UNF

>>28775523
this is some quality draw right there, do more soon.

>>28775878
thank you

>>28776117
I am curious to see if the bat will become a happy bat or if brave and vannie will have a fight over anon or other shenanigans
I guess we will have to draw more to find out

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>>28777940
>thicc
>on top of you
>careful
I want to squeeze the butt in lewd ways
and heavy sessions of cuddling and loving, INTENSE cuddling and loving

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>>28777940
ULTIMATE COZINESS

APPROACHING LEWD FACTOR 1

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>>28777940

>>28777777

Well, there's nothin going on so...

>>28778063
Thanks for the lewd based drawfag, but you broke Careful's back legs, man. You're a real one though. Don't go anywhere

Also we just gonna ignore the tuna sandwich? Or we already talk about that?

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>>28777940
>Haunch massages
You can't get much better than that

>>28778777
Gods trips speak the truth.

>>28777269
>10th thread died while I was away
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=IAeu7_jRySA

At some point Brave story became shit, Careful's Charge was never good.
Is this thread kill? Is there any hope for us?

>>28778856
No hope long as you're here.
>>/out/

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>>28778856
>two best stories in the thread are shit
You sir, get a (you).

>>28778856
Fucking end yourself.

I've been converted thanks to DoubleP and his Vannie art. I guess I can like one bat after all...

>>28777269
"Because my dick is twice as long, Anon"

>>28778917
>>28778950
>>28778970
Why are you so angry?

>>28779150
Stupid triggers me. Don't know about the other two.

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SKELETUS EMERGIS EXMORTIS!
This thread is now in HALLOWEEN MODE!

>>28778602
>but you broke Careful's back legs
if it's critic, care to elaborate? If there is something I can improve I would like to do so.
thanks for the nice words they make me all warm and fuzzy inside and stuff

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>Be Anonymous (4 of 9 in Equestria)
>You were all kept in Celestia's castle for study and safekeeping, being that there were only a few humans in existance
>You weren't allowed to go further than the castle walls, but you could go into the private gardens
>You rarely saw the other Anons, the castle had many rolling corridors to explore
>You didn't have much to do but sleep and waste time in your room
>Today, you thought you'd go pester Luna
>She was sleeping, so you knocked on her door a bit
>Knock knock knock
>"... Who disturbs my royal slumber?"
>Knock knock knock
>"Identify thyself!"
>She gets out of bed and clomps over to the door and opens it
>You hide around the corner, out of her sights
>She growls and goes back to bed
>You sneak over and bang on her door again before hiding
>Luna rushes to the door and looks out
>"This is not funny!" she shouts
>She goes back in and you wait a few moments for her to get comfy in bed
>You sneak over to the door
>A guard looks at you curiously as she comes around the corner
>"You're one of those humans, right?"
"Yeah. Say, could you stand there for a moment?"
>"Uh, sure." she nods and stands in front of Luna's door
>You again bang on the door, hard as you can and take off
>Luna spams open the door
>"I'LL HAVE YOUR HEAD FOR THIS! WHAT IS IT?!"
>"Uhm, I-I didn't knock, your highness..." she stutters
>"I see nopony else here. Why do you lie to me?"
>"There was a human here just a second ago. He knocked."
>"Do not blame your mischief on the humans, they are our guests."
>You sneak off, intent on more tomfoolery and devilishness

>>28778950
A-anon, those are our only two stories

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>>28779680
And that's the reason this thread is a kill.

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>>28779801
good try m8

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>>28779133
are you the delete bat anon? I am glad to have converted you to the ways of bat, may the skreeee be with you
dubs confirm, love the bat

>>28780096
Oh dear.

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>>28779801
I am almost impressed.

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>>28779629
Yea, k. Moblefaggin' tho so you get a shitty image.jpg. Horsie legs don't work that way. Even the show gets lazy with it sometimes (they were better about it in season 1) but for the most part you can get a pretty good idea how it's supposed to work just by watching a lot. Which I have, so there.

The horse 'knee' is actually just at the bottom of those big juicy haunches they all got. That thing everyone thinks is a knee is an ankle. Try bending that fucker backwards Like your knee and you'll get the idea. The ponies are a little warped in bone structure obviously, but you can tell what's supposed to be what if you look at 'em.

In your pic Careful is either an amputee or Anon completely broke her legs at the hock and bent them backwards. Her little hoovsies should be out in front underneath her.

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>>28779674
>>28779674
>You continue to shimmy down the hallways as Luna shouts at the guardsmare
>Absolutely DEVILISH
>Time to bother Celestia with an actual problem
>Knock knock knock
>"Come in."
>You open the door
>Damn, she thicc as hell
>You shimmy into the throne room
"Oh Sunbutt! I have a problem such that I may die!"
>"What? Are you okay?"
"I suffer from that feel when no gf!"
>Suddenly all the other Anon burst into the room from various places
>"I know that feel, bro." they say in unison
>You all join in a group hug before dispersing
>Celestia seems dumbfounded
>"You interrupted me to tell me about this because?"
"Please be my gf."
>"I'm sorry, Anon. I can't be your gf."
"How about now?"
>"Ugh, take this." she floats a coupon over to you
>It is adorned by a picture of Wojak and Celestia's signature
>'Good for one free gf'
>"Take this down to the deep sublevels of the castle. The guardsmare squadron will tear you apart."
"Oh boy! I've always wanted to die!"
>"Now get out of here."

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>>28780430
>"I suffer from that feel when no gf!"
>>Suddenly all the other Anon burst into the room from various places
>>"I know that feel, bro." they say in unison
this is fucking glorious

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>>28780362
thanks a lot for the feedback
I like to push the boundaries when it comes to mlp art. you know, fantasy and all. I am also one of those that prefer the human pussy compared to the horse one. anyway, I suppose in this context it might be better to keep it more realistic, though I have seen many do it right, it's a difficult thing to find the right balance. Art is a bitch.
Whenever you feel like something is not right just point it out, I really want to get better at this.

>>28780604
Surely you have a place where you dump art right

>>28780430
>The guardsmare squadron will tear you apart
>tfw you will never be torn apart by mares

>>28780604
looks like they should be falling off the bed

>>28780668
>
>
>you are fucking right
>mfw
this picture cant be saved...or?
to be continued

>>28780626
yes duop-qoub.tumblr

>>28780708
put them on the floor and tuck her legs up into her belly more. You'd have to redraw her haunches. Also she got THIC legs in the back and kinda small up front.

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>>28780814

>>28780837
Clever girl...

>>28780837
kek

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>>28780837
MMMM mm m

>>28780837
Saved both versions.

>>28780837
I sleep with my lifesize waifu plush sometimes. More often with her still on top but face to face.

It is hot and unf.

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>>28780894
I wish I had one of those. Gotta settle for a pillow instead.

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>>28780912
There is no better pone experience than this. Save some cash. I already have her for almost 2 years. Over 600 nights together.
>hfw

>>28780894
>>28780912
I don't think I have ever slept with or cuddling something in my life.

Why would you want to cuddle a pillow?

>>28780930
>tfw no mf
Gotta get a really nice down one or something. Supper soft and warm. Then you can pretend it's a cute little poner and that you aren't all alone. It just makes bed a little cozier at the end of the day when you can lie down and imagine you're loved.

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>>28780953
This

>>28780953
I cuddled my big pillow for over a year before I got my waifu. I missed her before I even had her.

>>28780837
top unf

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>>28780837
Now we need a rear view

>>28781101
>inb4 drawfag trolls by just giving us an ultra-close-up of Anon's anus

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>>28781144
Dub dubs confirms...?

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>>28781144
>>28781173
>>28781101
The dubs did it, I swear

Also you guys made me want a plush, and they are expensive as fuck, kill me now

>>28781144
>Implying we wouldn't enjoy that

>>28781273
and he posted it while I was typing it, also enjoy your vacation

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>>28781273

>>28781273
You just made my fucking day!

>saved as 'Anons perfect butthole'

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>>28781273
Good work you beautiful bastard

>>28781279
thanks Anon, I need it to think about what life choices led me to wanting to spent enourmous amounts of money for a plush of a pony to cuddle at night

>>28781273
why would you do this

>>28781300
Me too, me too. Unfortunately no job so no money to buy a snuggle bug. College lyf sucks.

>>28781300
Its a pretty good anus totally worth it. However I am jealous of your plush, where can I get one of equal quality?

>>28781328
>jealous of your plush
I think you misunderstood
I don't have one and I would like to get one, checking over at deviantArt where quality plushes exist, but expensive AS FUCK
http://img06.deviantart.net/cd05/i/2015/013/1/5/alicorn_twilight_sparkle_sleeping_pony_plush_by_janellesplushies-d8ds5t8.jpg
life is suffering

>>28780837
Nice, you are the only hope this thread have.

>>28781375
255$ isn't that bad, you got a job senpai?

>>28781429
Even if you have a min. wage job, just save for a few months until you feel comfortable spending money on something like that. I'd also make sure it's washable so that if you spill fluids on it you can just clean it easily.

>>28781379
while this is flattering as fuck, I think Blu and CW are the life of this thread.

>>28781429
Yes
you make it sound like it's not much
Which pony would you get?

>>28781445
I need it for cuddles only probably

>>28781459
Lyra, something about her color scheme makes her seem extra cuddly

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>>28781469
And her bubbly and happy personality.

>>28781475
Too bad they don't make the ones with the fun hole anymore

>>28781487
You mean Hoppip's Lyra plushie?

That was the most hilarious shit ever, the collective reaction of not just the fandom, but people outside of it was priceless.

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>>28781273

bemp

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y-you guys all suck
>tfw 9 plushies will never fill the void that a life-size one could
>tfw the cost of all 9 could probably have paid for one

just end my suffering already

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>>28780604
>I am also one of those that prefer the human pussy compared to the horse one
God damn dude, we believed in you... You were the chosen one!

>>28780604
>this guy prefers shit tier human pussy to god tier horse pussy
At least you are good at drawing.

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>>28780837
She'd be a little more subdued -- biting her lip and narrowing or closing her eyes. Except when she's making cute pone noises.

You should draw her staring down a plate of bacon with a similarly aroused expression.

At some point I have to get her back in armor since my story's gotten off-topic from guard stuff. I think since she's a clockmaker she'd wear something like the dwarven armor from TES. A helmet that shows her face, maybe, but still some heavy fuckin' shit.

I think in the next story I'll figure out some way to have her kick the fuck out of a ton of ninjas or some shit.

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>>28782689
Man, what did bread do to this poor pony

>>28781459
If you ever feel like drawing more Careful, any chance you could do one with her and Anon in a hot, steamy, relaxing bubble bath?

Bluuuu where are youuuuu
I need some good bat and Brave.
I think it would be interesting to get back into more guard stuff after Anon and Vannie's date.
Or after they fug

>>28776117

i dressed up as a cop today
many black jokes were made

>You pause and think of a way to explain this to her.
"I don't know how, but there's been a few big things that tell me this is still Earth, despite the differences."
>"Like what?"
>Another sigh escapes you.
"Well, remember when I kinda just... broke down crying? On the balcony?"
>Her ears flatten a bit, and she nods.
"That was when I knew for sure where I was."
>Vannie stays silent and seated, waiting for you to continue.
"I saw the planet I remembered seeing and learning about back home. There was no mistaking it."
>You feel her wing hold you a bit tighter.
"In short, I just overreacted, mostly because I didn't- and still don't- really know how to feel about this. I don't know whether I should feel honored, or sad, or angry at everything... though I definitely gave Brave an earful earlier."
>You stay silent for a moment.
"Thanks for doing the same for me, though... For staying by my side through it all- it really does mean a lot to me."
>She gives you a cute smile with a tilt of her head.
>"Well, isn't that what a guard does?"
>A smirk crosses your face, and you nod.
"Yes, I do believe it is."
>Quickly, silence takes the air around you.
>Though, it's a calm, comfortable silence.
>But as the seconds go by, you start to notice Vannie getting anxious again.
>Just like she did earlier.
>She wants to say something, more so than she did earlier, but-
>"-III've got the food things!"
>-But the waitress ruins it.
>Seriously, you're pretty positive at this point that she just waits.
>She waits before waiting.
>Walking around the tables, she walks another tray over to you both, and bumps it onto the table.
>...Then kind of just stands there.
>She looks at you both, biting her lip for a few seconds.
>Then she practically jumps.
>"Heeey, I know this is a bit weird, but can I take a picture with you? BOTH of you?"

>>28783386
Nice

>>28783386
Oh shit, VANNIE CHECK THE FOOD, THE WAITRESS IS A TRAITOR!

>>28783386
Kind of a strange waitress, if adorable.

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>>28783620
Anon has a hit out on him, and some "random" waitress all of a sudden wants a picture with him? ITS A TRAP!

>>28783386
I really hope this is leading into a porno shoot scene.

>>28783667
nah its fine, just look into the crossbow... I mean the camera dont move and smile

>>28783756
This is pony verse, I wouldn't be surprised if it was.

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Hey guys look at the QT that I found

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>>28783840
My "Autistic OC" meter is off the charts here.
>Sunset colour pallet
>"""armour""" has Twilight's cutie mark on it, and uses her colours as well.
>floor sweeping tail
I'm not even going to mention the pants on head retarded design on that armour. I've came to terms with the fact that any pone armour design is bound to be terrible, save for maybe picrelated

>>28783840
Would definitely smooch and rub her horn

>>28783923
>My "Autistic OC" meter is off the charts here.
Hit the nail on the head. She's some DA artists SunsetxFlutershy child. Still, she has a cute design, isn't that what matters here?

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>>28784192
Not for me, since my fetish, the armour is botched.

>>28784192
>SunsetxFlutershy child
Nothing [TRIGGERS] me more than lesbian assbabies.

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Bedtime bump

>>28782689
>>28782770
not saying I don't like it, it's just that in most cases the horse pussy isnt drawn very well and i think the human pussy looks cuter.
I really like this kind of style: https://derpibooru.org/1274532
but I think this is also pretty good:
https://derpibooru.org/1285606

>>28782815
she's cumming
I have the feeling you want me to draw her in armor

>>28785113
>in most cases the horse pussy isnt drawn very well and i think the human pussy looks cuter.
Not being sarcastic, I cannot fap to human pussy on pony body. It's not attractive at all, and I think the majority of /mlp/ agrees with me, or takes it a step further and say it's never attractive whatsoever. To me, I can't look past the "It's just a pink slit on a swollen bump" think, while pony pussy, well, it's not.

>https://derpibooru.org/1274532
No.

>https://derpibooru.org/1285606
Acceptable.

>>28785113
Then learn to draw it yourself, become the hero /mlp/ needs!

And make it PUFFY
https://derpibooru.org/1231620

>>28785359
Shino makes the best clop. In every way.

>>28785113
>second link
Perfect unf.

>>28783130
if no other cute ideas come in the way

>>28785359
shino is god tier

>>28785731
>shino is god tier
So are you, faggot. We believe.

>>28785113
>>28785359
oh boy, we're doing favorite pone puss depictions?

https://desu-usergeneratedcontent.xyz/trash/image/1467/34/1467345261491.png

>>28785804
I prefer Shino-style or like https://derpibooru.org/1206678?scope=scpe8271b12d01626729d9de66fd5f16f1263d0f35c7

Absolute plebs, the lot of you. And you call yourselves horsefuckers? I bet y'all don't even like teats.

https://derpibooru.org/1250802

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>>28786002
>genital piercings

>this wasn't posted still
https://derpibooru.org/1076388
Y'all motherfuckers need jesus

>>28786109

Yea, yea. Ziggers amiright? Don't use some stupid little thing as a way to dismiss the fact that your taste in "horse" pussy is shit.

https://derpibooru.org/1121556

>>28786263
>Ziggers amiright?
No. It's genital piercings. They are disgusting, period. It has nothing to do with taste in horse pussy.

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>>28786224
Honestly I hate that one. The genitals and face are 10/10, but those turning folds on her side seem super exaggerated, and once I noticed I can't fap to it without being distracted by what looks like whale blubber.

>>28786424
Nah, those would be turning folds if she was turning the other way. This is just artist trying to make her thicc

>>28786488
Fat does not equal thicc

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the panties are just a censor for scruffy

>>28785775
you flatter the fuck out of me, thanks anon b-baka

>>28785804
nice

>>28786711
>Not horse ass.
>Human pus pus.
What are you fucking gay?

>>28786711
10/10 so far.
Waiting for l-lewds.

>>28786761
Kill yourself.

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>>28786761
who says it's a human pussy?
any examples for "horse ass"?

>>28786776
Thank you Anon

>>28786711
thank you based doubleP

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>>28786711
Would fuck/10

>>28786711
i feel like her hips should be splayed out to the sides more

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>>28786809
>any examples for "horse ass"?
Man we are derailing this thread so hard

>>28786898
you gonna get scruffed with that big clitoris on display like that nigga

>>28786711
Tubular.

>>28786904
Nah, never happened before. She is clothed after all, can't you see the panties?

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>>28786922
ive been banned for the same image several times

>>28786711
Uncensored version when/where?

>>28787008
Please doubleP give the improved version. You say it's a censor but it can't be censored if there isn't something lewd there to start out.

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>>28786927
Git gud

>>28787008
>>28787043
gee guys, you make me upload unfinished work

https://derpibooru.org/1286538

>>28787130
hOLY fuck that shit is primo nigga.
That is like my ideal horsepussy.
Maybe add a little more folds near the top.
Do not fucking stop.
Drop it like it's hot.

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I like how CW anon didn't really display all that intent to go lewd yet and writing a comfy story, yet all this art now spirals into deep clop

>>28787130
Fucking 9/10 just expand the middle a bit or something.
Very fappable.

>>28787130
You know what's ever better then just having a drawfag?

Having an active, responding, nice drawfag.
Praise.

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>>28787167
thanks a lot Anon! This is actually my first attempt at drawing horse pussy

>>28787178
well he should have thought about that before creating a waifu tier oc
We must go deeper

>>28787186
Thanks Anon.
Also i was definately thinking about expanding the middle if you get what I mean huehuehue

>>28787239
<3

>>28787178
>>28787280
Enjoying the stuff I do enough to make fanart of it is wicked flattering. I'm on-board with whatever you wanna draw.

>>28787342
I just don't want you to be pressured into writing lewds, since that mare is not for sexual during the off-season

>>28787342
>>28787367
Yeah, what this anon said. Continue on with whatever you would normally continue on with, don't let these draws sway you.

>>28787342
thanks man.
Also I agree with the Anons. Doesn't mean there shouldn't be lewd. There should be love and care for the mare, followed by lewd when the time is right. I also don't want to create the opposite effect and stop you from lewd, if you planned lewd for the next parts that's ok too. I think what is important is that the setting is believable and that the lewd is out of love and not lewd for the sake of being lewd. I want to see the mare being loved, not being used.
You have not disappointed so far and I don't expect it in the future. you will do good with whatever you do. I am hyped for more green. Keep the awesome coming.

>>28787367
>>28787373
>>28787482
No worries. I write what I want. Decided precisely how lewd it would or would not be once it became an ongoing story, i.e. weeks ago.

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>>28787130
Fukken saved
>>28787280
>This is actually my first attempt at drawing horse pussy
Your horse pussy is OK, but it seems it needs, I dunno, more depth?

>>28780096
>may the skreeee and kekekek and all the other autistic things made up by the fandom be with you

>>28787538
I like your attitude to writing CW

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>Manly anon assigned guard. because diplomatic tradition.
>pony not into humans.
>SHTF
>Forced to flee civilization with guard.
>Months pass
>Guard falls for anon after seeing how well he can handle himself in a fight and other tough situations.
>Once things have settles. thought dead. They come out of hiding.
>Anon with now heavily pregnant guard pony in arms.

>>28788505
>>Anon with now heavily pregnant guard pony in arms.
SOLD

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>>28777426
>tfw i got the same hat on rn

>>28788505
or could be use as an ending for other stories i guess.

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>>28786809
well, pretty much the difference between the two is that the human-esque version is more bubbly

while horsie stuff can have a bit of it, too much rump can make it look odd

>>28783386

wow this thread got really lewd all of a sudden
i like it

>She fidgets in her place.
>"I know it's really, reeeaaally weird, but nopony will believe me when I say I've waited for a BAT pony and a... hue... uuuh-"
"-Human-"
>"-Yeah THAT!"
>She smiles at Vannie.
>"And honestly I've never seen a bat pony so close before. Or out of their armor."
>She gets a bit closer to Vannie, scanning her up and down.
>"I personally never understood the dislike for you all..."
>She trails off, then takes to just looking into her eyes for a moment.
>The second Vannie starts to look uncomfortable, the waitress-
>"-You have pretty eyes, if you don't mind me saying, miss!"
>She turns around and grabs a camera from herself.
>It's one of those old school self-printing ones.
>Her smile just widens, and she runs in place a bit.
>"Sooo...?"
>You and Vannie share an unsure look.
>Though, looking at this pony, you don't think she's up to no good or anything.
>She just seems really quirky.
"Ah, sure, I guess-"
>"-AW YEA-"
>She hops on the seat between you both, camera facing you all.
>Like an old school selfie or something.
>She grins and tilts her head a bit, holding the camera in her blue hooves.
>"Alrighty, smiiile!"
>You give one of your half-ass portrait smirks, and Vannie's looks a tiny bit forced.
>The flash goes off, and immediately after, you swear you can see something covered in a blue aura slide onto your plates.
>-Wait WHAT?

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>>28789690
She spiked their lunch with aphrodisiac

>>28789690
FUCKING KNEW IT

FILTHY GRYPHONIAN SPY

>>28789690
>>The flash goes off, and immediately after, you swear you can see something covered in a blue aura slide onto your plates.
WELL THATS A LITTLE FISHY EH?

>>28789690
>Vannie rubs her eyes after the flash, while the waitress takes the photo out of the camera.
>"Alright, let's just see how it came out heeere!"
>She shakes the picture a bit, and watches as it slowly develops.
>And sure enough, subtly glancing at the picture, you see that behind that white and blue mane of hers, there's a horn.
>...If she has a horn, then why didn't she use her magic all this time?
>Is she PURPOSELY hiding it?
>-And what the FUCK went into your food?!
>See looks at the image and grins.
>"-Awesooome! Thank you both so much!"
>She hops off the seat and looks at you both, as giddy as ever.
>"So then, anything else you two want?"
>You quickly shake your head.
>"Okaaay! Then you need anything, just holler!"
>She skips away.
>Vannie, still a bit disoriented, continues to rub her eyes.
"Vannie, we've got to get the hell out of here."
>She turns to you, now clearly confused.
>"...Huh? Why?"
>You turn to your food in horror.
"I swear I saw her slip something into our food. With MAGIC."
>"What?"
>You move over to your sandwich and immediately scan it.
>Man, and it looks so good, too...
>You pull it apart slowly, as if you're looking for a bomb.
>Christ, what did she do to it?
>What IS it?
>You hold your breath, until you finally spot something out of place.
>It's a strip of something, completely white.
>You slowly reach for it, fearing what it may be.
>Though, the second you do, you realize what exactly it is.
>It's paper.
>A note.
>You slowly pull it from under the sandwich.
>"W-what is it?"
>Flipping it over, it's...
>-An address?
>A RESIDENTIAL address?
>You look over Vannie's plate and take the slip of paper from hers.
>'You both are welcome here, anytime~ -Minuette'
>Putting that piece next to yours on the table, you see that it was clearly a full note at one point, just torn in half.
>Vannie hesitantly leans over and glances over it.
>"Oh."
>Her eyes move over the note, and slowly, a blush makes its way onto her cheeks.
>"...O-oh."

>>28789913
Ahaha hitting on customers? How unprofessional! Unless it's a trap of some kind. Not sure why she'd need to hide her magic and slip a piece of paper into the food.
Also what does Minuette look like?

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>>28789969
>Not knowing toothpastiest pone
Have a Minuette.

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>>28789819
I would do such lewd things to Lyra.

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>>28789969
>Also what does Minuette look like?
you wot

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>>28789913
Wait, the waitress was Brushiehorse the whole time?

Also foursome when?

>>28790004
>>28790016
Wasn't sure if she was the same pone Blu was talking about so I wanted to confirm.

>>28789913
Oh its Minuette, Oooooooh, so...foursome when?

>>28789913
>admits to never seeing bat pone up close
>invites both human and batponer to her home immediately
Sounds like somebody's a little adventurous.

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>>28777940
>one day and 23 hours ago

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>>28791808
>save me.png
>file is a jpg

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>>28791853
>implying it wasn't on porpoise

>>28791808
Tomorrow morning I'm hitting up the local coffee joint, finding a nice corner, and typing up some bomb snuggles just for you, Anon.

>>28792481
Just snuggles. Pone is not for sexual after all.

Even the newly cute bat pone.

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>>28792514
wew lad
thats where youre wrong

>>28792481
>lurking so hard
squee.jpg

>>28785314
I like them both

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>>28780430
>You take your waifu voupon and head to the elevator
>There are about a hundred floors
>You go down to sublevel 6
>The elevator drops at an alarming rate before slamming into the bottom of the elevator shaft
>You pick yourself up off of the ground and step out of the lift
>The lights flicker gently in the dark industrial hall
>The scent of sewage wafts throughout the halls
>DING
>The elevator doors grind shut, the one on the right doesn't fully close and you see the elevator rise up and away
>Shit's scary, yo
>You look at the coupon
>Redeemable on B6
>You start walking through the hall
>Pitch black rooms line the right with doors either left open or removed entirely
>You have the light of the sparsely placed fluorescents to guide you
>This was a mistake
>You peek into one of the dark rooms
>It holds two beds, unoccupied, and a table with a lamp
>At the end of the hall, it turns into darkness on the left, or a poorly-lit room on the right that looks like a lounge
>You go into the lounge and sit on an ancient couch
>There is a soda machine rattling on one end of the room along with a water fountain
>Across from the hall you came from, it leads to a darker room
>You look in, a tv is on with some news program playing quietly
>There is a pony sitting in a couch across from the tv, zoning out
>You take a step into the room, accidentally knocking over a can
>The mare jumps and points her horn at you
>"Fuck off, frog!" she fires a bright blue beam at you
>You take a step to get out of the way but slip on an open container of ramen and faceplant into the concrete floor

>>28793296
I am unsure, but continue.

>>28792481
>bomb snuggles

>"Anon, these are some bomb-ass snuggles"

>>28792520
>That little lace band on her wing-claw
I have no idea why, but that is incredibly hot.

Should I, uh. Continue FeatherScarf or?..

>>28792520
fuck that's hot

>>28793296
this is the beginning of horror

>>28793702
more green is always good

>>28789913
are we foursome now?

>>28793702
You're not writing. There isn't really much to discuss or hype about yet.
Get to it. Make the other two greens share the spotlight.
Make FeatherScarf great... For the first time.

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I like ponies

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>>28795249
>>28795238
I fucking love this thread
and ponies

>page 9
nope

>>28789913
>You and Vannie kind of just share a look.
"Well, looks like you're not just popular with stallions."
>Her blush deepens.
>Guess the waitress is into the 'exotic' stuff.
>And now thinking about it, you guess you could be considered 'exotic', too.
>Though just a few years ago you lived as the mass majority.
>Now, you're like a white tiger or something.
>...Though, you're pretty sure white tigers are extinct, now.
>Damn.
>But, you digress.
>Still doesn't explain why she didn't use her magic all this time.
>-Her horn being hidden is a bit understandable, though.
>It seriously looks like she just woke up.
>And if it weren't for the blue aura you saw, you never would've guessed she was a unicorn.
>You find it odd that the bedhead-look is what seems to be trending, here.
>Or at least, it may as well be trending.
>All those fashion model pictures you've seen all have the same messy mane.
>And before your mind drifts away into questioning bizaare pony fashion, you notice that Vannie is still winning the blue ribbon for reddest tomato.
>So you do what any sane person would do, and allow Vannie's feelings about sweet mare action simmer, all while smiling like a retard.
>The food on your plate finally catches your eye, and your main directive becomes clear.
>CONSUME.
>Hell, the appetizers were mauled, so really all that is left is this, anyways.
>And you're still hungry.

>>28796896

even half-dead in the mornings, i write more green in work-mode than i can ever do in my free-time
just kill me

>...Also, you think you're a little buzzed.
>But just a little.
>Probably because you drank a bit before you actually ate-
>-H-holy fuck, this is amazing.
>This tastes just like a regular burger.
>A-and, the ranch sauce- or whatever's in this, is practically pure porn, just poured all inside this thing.
>And it looks just like it did in the picture.
>The jalapenos practically melt in your mouth, which, while being weird, is simultaneously the best goddamn thing ever.
>You have to stifle a moan.
>It's just that good.
>Taking another bite, you don't even feel able to describe the individual flavors anymore.
>You're too lost in it all that you just let them rest as one beautiful concoction.
>You don't even remember the last time you ate meat actually, but this is ex-fucking-actly like a regular burger.
>Though you can still see the veggies and shit in it that tells you it's not.
>But the sweet, sweet taste of the food you always missed is what makes this so good.
>You shudder with pleasure.
>If this keeps up, you may need to change your pants.
>THAT'S HOW GOOD IT IS.
>Like being stuck in a desert for hours, then finding an enormous oasis party, complete with every single goddamn drink you'd want in the universe.
>With steak, a-and ribs, and this smoky bbq sauce that's just beautifully tangy, but still-
"-M-mmmph..."
>Oh shit you just moaned

>>28796912
In work-mode you're already in the mindset of getting stuff done so it makes sense that you'd be able to write more during that time. That's how it is with me and projects/papers. I'll write much more when I'm supposed to be working and just do nothing when I'm home and have access to my games.

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>>28796896
>>And before your mind drifts away into questioning bizaare pony fashion, you notice that Vannie is still winning the blue ribbon for reddest tomato.
>>So you do what any sane person would do, and allow Vannie's feelings about sweet mare action simmer, all while smiling like a retard.
Oh my, looks like she's into that

>>28797027
it just sucks though
every week, im like, "shit, i didn't write that much these entire seven days. well, can't wait for the weekend, ill have PLENTY of time to write!"

then i dont write

rinse, repeat

>>28796912

>>28797524
>seven days
fuck, whatever
may as well be, with how slow the days get sometimes

>
>It feels like it's been a second later.
>But now you're staring at an empty plate.
>Hell, even Vannie finished.
>Good things never last, do they?
FORESHADOWING- maybe
>The sound that brought you out of your stupor walks out in front of you, in all her blueish-ness.
>She's got an even cheerier smile, and a very faint blush.
>Because pony physics you guess, it's always easy to spot.
>These ponies blush for everything, you swear.
>"You guys enjoy yourselves? I asked the cook to make sure you'd have absolutely no complaints about the food!"
>She stands proudly, a tiny smirk on her face.
>You and Vannie both nod, as she grabs the plates off the table.
>Immediately, a question bubbles up.
"So, if you have a horn, how come you don't use it?"
>She tosses it all onto her back and grins at you.
>"Weeell, I kind of got told not to by my boss."
>She kicks the ground a bit.
>"I maaay have had a tiny, tiiiny little accident, that maaay have destroyed a LOT of plates and glasses."
>Oh.
>Well, that makes more sense.
>"Maaay have."
>She moves around a bit with a grin.
>"But hey, I had an Earth pony parent, so I don't just need magic to move things around! I've got a bit of that connection to the ground and stuff, too!"
>She looks over you both, her cheeks getting visibly redder.
>"Aaand, a few other perks~"
>She flashes you both a sultry smile.
>Her eyes dart to the note still resting on the table, and her cheeks now practically turn purple.
>"I just hope you'll accept my invitation for desert sometime..."
>-You feel your own face heat up.
>I-is it just hot in here, or wh-what?
>Vannie's wings spring up slightly, where she immediately tries to push them back down to her sides.
>Minuette then jumps up, back to her simple little smile.
>"-And speaking of desert, did you want anything? The menu's right here! Oooh, and there's always the arcade!"

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>>28797524
I know this feel too damn well. I killed 2 of my stories in the period of free time because I just fucking couldn't get around to writing

>>28797670
She's just getting cuter and cuter.

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>>28797670
>>Hell, even Vannie finished.

>>28797670
You do Minuette well.

Maybe Anon could do her just as well. With Vannie.

>>28797810
No, Anon is Brave's now.

He must bring both of them with him

>>28797955
>>"... Girls, we've got a new toy." she grins all too menacingly
all i did was cringe here

embarrassing

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>>28797971
>I cringed
Okay, I'll go to bed
https://youtu.be/eVTXPUF4Oz4

>>28777940
>"Oh!"
"You alright?"
>"Yeahhh... oh. That spot. Right there."
>You work that spot, around the top of her upper thigh.
>She rests her forelegs on your free arm and nuzzles your neck as you work.
>Her breath is warm and moist on your face.
"You really like that, huh?"
>"You're a natural. You could get spa work, you know."
"I... don't know about that."
>"Suit yourself. You'd be popular with the mare clientele, I think. Probably a few stallions-"
>You pinch her butt.
>"eep!"

>...

>You wonder if it's been hours or just minutes of this now.
>Probably the latter. Your cuddly, warm, oxytocin high is still flowing, but it hasn't wore you out yet.
>Somewhere along the line, you had started carressing the back of Careful's legs, which she liked.
>You had traced each of them from the back of the hooves, up to her ankles, along the tendons, up to the small of her back.
>Then you'd scratch her right above the base of her tail. She liked that too.
>Your hands came inevitably to rest on each side of her rear.
>She blushed and kissed your neck when you took it in two light handfuls.
>She looks in your eyes.
>You look in hers.
>You play a little drumbeat on her ass with your fingers on each hand.
>She can't not grin.

>You roll back on your side, plopping her on the bed beside you.
>She stands up and stretches her legs before getting back down.
>"So... I, uh."
"Mh?"
>"I'm sorry I'm not in... I can't... you must be... I noticed you looking-"
"I'm fine. And whatever we're having now... the alternative? I like it."
>She brightens up.
>"I'm glad. I like being with you."
"I would have wanted to talk a little about it first, anyway. I figure some aspect might be... different."
>She presses her nose agaisnt yours and bats her eyes.
>"The fundamentals are the same, I'm sure."
>She kisses you and curls up with you as the candle starts to dim.

>>28798063
I thought it was fine. Definitely didn't need to delete the post for it.

>>28798063
pls no. it was good. dont delete shit on one retard's opinion.

>>28798082
It is already delet
It was a shit anyways, the whole story was just awful

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>>28798063
kek
did you really delete the post

>>28798066
>>You work that spot, around the top of her upper thigh.
Oh yes.

This is getting too warm and cozy for me, how am I supposed to self insert into this.

>>28798101
no

story was funny, and probably the most realistic.

>>28798063
>delete
>after just one post saying it's shit

Honestly, that's pretty low, Anon. You can't really go anywhere if you can't take even a single post.

>>28798066
And I would have at least given her the fug, a little taste of the sweets down under. It's not like you NEED to do the do with her.

That comes later.

And so will I.

>>28798066
Very nice.

>>28798066
Unf

>>28797670
Unf, this mare be thirsty as hell.

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>>28797670

Mini is one of my favorite ponies. and i can definitely see her as a cuddleslut. but i'm worried for vannie feeling like she's being used again.

>>28798551
A little editing and now rose is Vannie

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>>28798551
>forgot image
derp

>>28798066
10/10 would cuddle again

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>>28798066
this is getting comfy as fuck, though isn't heat only like once a year for a certain amount of time? poor Anon will get blueballed fast

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>>28798876
Estrus basically lasts all spring and summer, with it being the most intense in spring, getting less and less intense as fall approaches.

So prepare to do a lot of screwing in the warm months.

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>>28797670
unf

>>28798896
death by snusnu is a glorious way to die

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>>28798896
>tfw you will not screw your qt waifu for 6 months, because of that stupid estrus.
This kills the balls and the D.

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>>28799460
Real talk though.

If equines have evolved to the point where they are sapient, they must also have sex for pleasure. For example, we don't "only" have sex for the purpose of procreation. So why would ponies not also fuck for pleasure/bonding in winter/cooler months?

>>28799482
At least the ponies in one of the stories considers just cuddling to be the equivalent of a one night stand. fugging is probably considered a borderline sacred act only done between ponies who intend to be together forever. I imagine that since they have so little experience. Bedroom encounters are usually infrequent quick and terribly terribly cute.

>>28799596 Con
I like to imagine that it's more of an emotional experience rather than physical and 9 times out of 10 end with one or both popping their corks before the other is even inside.

>>28798118
>>28798143
He said he cringed
The most grave insult

>>28799621
Must grow a thicker skin to be here. Or you will end up killing your self irl

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>>28798063
If you go through life trying to make everyone else happy you're not going to do anything but make yourself miserable or in the immortal words of Mike Tyson "he who is a friend to everyone is an enemy to himself".

Just go ahead and write your story if it sucks we'll give criticism and then you can write the next one better but no one gets through this life without making mistakes he might as well just go ahead and accept that.

And lastly there's other reasons that we call everyone on 4chan a nigger and a faggot besides the fact that we can get away with it, it's to run off the thin skinned ppl and toughen you up a lil' bit this might be mlp but we still are the Internet hate machine

>>28798124
>how am I supposed to self insert into this
with your penis, of course.

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>>28798066

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>>28798066
>>She stands up and stretches her legs before getting back down.

>captcha was eggs

>>28799482
Estrus is just a thing to ensure birth of the foal durring warm months. It's an adaptation for a dumb animal to ensure survival. It really makes no sense for ponies. Thay've obviously gotten to the point a long, long time ago where they were smart enough to survive despite their environment. Fire, shelter, etc. Estrus doesn't make sense anymore. It would be better to be able to fug any time so as to create as many foals as possible without the constraint of season.

Estrus is just a fetish thing really. It's not as glamorus, but the regular ovulation you get in humans is really the superior system and probably the one all sufficiently advanced mammals would evolve towards.

TL;DR the whole thing is kinda dumb

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>>28800413
No fun detected.

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Hey guys, I've just spent the past three hours going through all previous Guard Mare threads to make a Google Doc archive. I'd really appreciate it if you would put it in the next thread. I put in every green over 150 words into it.

https://docs.google.com/document/d/1anLrDxG9gEKl5kOBm6w1R-VVRRjWTtejPnFq6iyd3P4/edit?usp=sharing

>>28800606
Wow. Kudos.

>>28800413
My reasoning is technology outpaces evolution. I'm obviously not a biologist, but Homo Sapiens still has all sorts of vestigial behavioral shit going on, right.

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>>28797670
>"Aaand, a few other perks~"

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>>28800606

>>28798066
it's a little bit of unf and a little bit of comfy
IT'S PERFECT

>>28800672
I think the other Anon is right. I remember once hearing something similiar about evolution and human intelligence and how we came to be what we are. but in any case, this is not really important I think, this is pony land. if you like your headcanon then that's what's good. after all it's about the fun

>>28800606
Nice, dude.

>>28800606
Are all the "Dead" ones truly dead? As in they didn't finish? Perhaps you should have a distinction between dead and finished.

>>28801188
>>28801166
Two double dubs in a row. Dude nice.

>>28800654
>>28800693
>>28801166
Thanks guys.

>>28801188
The large majority is 'unfinished and abandoned'. Good thinking, though, I will distinguish between them.

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could we get a chart like this but for careful?

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>>28802208
sure

>>28802244
Please bat, do not cry. You are worthy of a million hugs.
This picture hurts my soul, doublep. Why would you make this.

>>28802244
those are some MASSIVELY FLUFFY EARS

>>28802268
nobody asked for a chart with vannie, the bat wants love too
>tfw no cute human to protect from other mares
>tfw you cuddle human and he still chooses brave
>tfw disgusting bat
>tfw brave gets cuddles and you dont
>tfw you have to guard anyway

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>>28802300
>>tfw no cute human to protect from other mares
>tfw

>>28802244
>Batshit

>>28802244
FLUFFY EARS
L
U
F
F
Y

E
A
R
S

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>>28802370
[skrees of sadness]

>>28802244
Heart wrenchingly great
Those ears are wonderful.
Doing gods work with those hips as well.

>>28802527
I want to rub her ears and dry her tears.

>>28802527
>[skrees of fanmade cancer]

>>28802590
lol i suppose the irony of your own post is lost on you.

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>>28802713

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>>28802471
>>28802567
>>28802585
>ears and hips, that's all you are to them

>>28802757
Oh my god hug her already

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>>28802757
>>28802244
>>28802527
Who made favorite batgirl sad?!

>>28802757
fuck you. You being sad wouldn't make us sad if that all you were to us.

let's not role play.

>>28802757
To be fair, she's got pretty nice ears and hips.

>>28802757
Stop it you glorious faggot. Get happy bat here, this is getting depressing.

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>>28802208
>>28802244

While we're at the topic of charts, would it be too much to ask for one of these with Careful, Brave or Vannie?

My heart would literally explode

>>28802757
>Fanmade autism, that's all you are to them

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>>28802777
trips confirm hug
>>28802799
doubles confirm no role play

>>28802916
happy bat

>>28802931
jesus christ

and with that i go to bed

>>28802960
Fuck yes.
Yesssss.

>>28802960
fug the bat

>>28802960
So is that a yes or no about the chart thingy

no pressure you know, no pressure
but pls doublep
pls


pls

>>28802757
BAT NO
DO NOT BE SAD
PLEASE GOD
BAT NO I WILL HUG YOU FOREVER
I LOVE YOU BAT

>>28803076
You're gonna scare the poor pony off if you keep pestering him/her =(

>>28802960
Hug that bat so hard she turns blue
I will never let you go bat, you are too cute

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>>28803161
TOO CUTE

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>>28802960
This physically forced me to smile. I am actually feeling strong happiness towards a sketch of a comforted Vannie. Why do I feel this way.

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>>28803225
because your life is devoid of the real thing and all you can have is an empty imitation

>>28803249
Thanks for that mister ray of sunshine.

>>28803249
You're not wrong.

So THIS is why people kill themselves...

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>>28803267
youre welcome my friend

>>28783840
That looks almost exactly like Sunset Shimmer

creativity: boo/10

>>28803298
Don't give the faggot the satisfaction.

>>28802208
These charts are so slutty though. You really wanna get cucked by your waifu just to see her face as someone seduces her, fucks her, and then holds her? At that point, not only are you a cuck, your waifu a shit.

>>28803870
I never said anything about cucking and the only person that implied that is you
is that your fetish anon?

>>28803870
wew lad

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two days ago, this thread was lewd and arousing
now i come home, and it's sad and depressing
jesus doubleP, they say a picture's worth a thousand words, but yours may as well be world encyclopedias.

i feel like my soul imploded, exploded, then split into two, where one half mercilessly raped the other until they both died.
in other words, it's great. you're too good to us, man

>>28800606
also,

>Brave & Vannie
>50,000~ Words
>Careful’s Charge
>18,000~

this cant be right
i dont feel ive written more than 10k, and definitely not enough for this big of a difference

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>>28802931
wrong version

>>28804107
This but with vannie

>>28804134
>>28804107
How about fuck both of you with a cactus enema, they both deserve a smile and snuggles.

>>28804009
>>28804023

Oh come on. You don't have to temp your waifu into not being able to help herself just to get some love. That chart is totally slutty. It doesn't take a retard to get the insinuation.

>"hey bb, want some fuk?"
>"oh well I just love getting my pussy pounded so much, please fuck me"
>not slutty

Even if you aren't a cuck and just self inserting your waifu is still a slut.

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>>28803184
Jesus Christ, that rump needs to be bumped!

>>28804148
It's a joke you sperg, read the penultimate panel

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>>28804155
ayy lmao

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>>28804050
>this cant be right
>i dont feel ive written more than 10k, and >definitely not enough for this big of a difference

I'm 100% sure. You're just that good, pham.
Please don't stop now that you've seen the word counts. Please.

>>28804298
Doesn't pastebin have a second raw copy at the bottom of the page? So the word count might be more like 25k. Maybe test by highlighting the whole story and then doing the word count again but now looking at the selected portion. Unless you're getting the wordcount directly from Google Docs in which case that's a lot of words.