Royal Guard Mare - Thread 3

fuuuuck me. There are so few guard mare pics.

>posted all I had in the last thread alone.

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I still think this one is the cutest of them all

>>28260908
That probably is best out there. only problem I have is that it may be a deer. Not a mare.

>>28260950
Hmm... Either way. I'd still snuggle her.

>>28260963
definitely

>>28260908
>>28260950
>A
>FUCKING
>LEAF

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>No cute guard ponies to guard you with their life.
>Only for you to befriend them, and tell them that it would hurt you far more if anything ever happened to them, because of you.

Yay new thread, don't let her die early now guys

>>28261691
>No one cares enough to guard you

Ahhh heres the thread. Drawing another sinple pic of Brave. Stay tuned.

>>28262141
sweet

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>>28262141
Welp. Scratch that. I was drawing Brave but it turned out shit and I had to scrap it. I'm going to bed but Ill start from scratch tomorrow. Until then

>"Vannie, I need a distraction"!

>>28262438
>zubat
And that's when bat pony dies because fuck Zubat, I just wanna get through the fucking cave without my Pokemon being confused every 5 steps.

Snowflake?

>>28263464
Bumping the bump.

>>28261691

that art is great

>>28260769
That's quite the OC. Just what I expect from someone with no taste.

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>>28262438
I tried, again

>>28262438
>>28264543
Cute stuff

>tfw shitty writer and artist

>>28265488
(You)
Do not spend it all at once, peasant.

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>>28265756

>>28262438
>>28264543
QT batpony

I'd definitely snuggle while she screes

Emergency bump

moar green when?

>>28260769
I like the manestyle, but the colors are kinda awful.

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>>28262087
>tfw
>tfw they'd just let you die

>>28266809
A cute.

A CUTE!

>>28266809
>Be Anon
>One of many in Equestria
>You and every other scumbag managed to get through to the promised land and tainted it
>Humans are the niggers of Equestria
>You make a small living in the city as a street performer
>Unicycling, juggling, lion-taming, the whole shebang
>One day some faggot shanks you in the belly out of nowhere
>Some short gook sticks a blade in your gut five or six times
>Fall to the sidewalk as he rummages through your pockets for some cash
>Black out
>Wake up
>Black out again
>Wake up once more, hear voices
>It's a royal guardsmare approaching
>She looks down at you, annoyed
>"Ugh, somepony is going to have to clean this up." she keeps on walking
>Before you die, you faintly see Brendan Fraser crying

>>28266978
Thanks for making me sad, Anon

>tfw you'd probably only see a guardsmare trying to get rid of you

>>28266978
If i somehow survived id seek out revenge
And by that i mean rape the guard mare

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>>28267059
>"This is the nice part of town, get outta here, monkey."

>>28267135
Way to perpetuate the nigger stereotype.

>>28260769
Someone post Thread 3 before me. How nice.
Good Job OP number 3. I can rest. before that post the fucking pastebin.

>>28260908
>Canada nation?
>Deer?

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>>28260769
Just in case anyone wants to know, she's a character in a fic called "Silent Knight"

http://www.fimfiction.net/story/230095/memoirs-of-a-royal-guard

>>28267826
omg thank you so much gonna read up now!!

>>28266978
>Humans are the niggers of Equestria.

From now on whenever i see a story starting with "You are Anon" im going to post that quote. Great stuff.

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Imperial guard anon, you still there?

>>28251772
>Brave just lightly pats your back.
>From someone who just viciously cuddled you this morning, you'd expect more than a simple pat on the back from her.
>…Wait a minute.
>Can she be considered a cuddleslut for this morning?
>Well, that would be more or a cuddleRAPIST, you'd think.
>You're not sure how far this cuddling thing goes, exactly.
>Vannie stops hugging you, and you realize that she just offered to be your friend.
>-Well she kind of offered herself, and Brave against her will, but you know.
>Those looks of sympathy are telling you that they think you're just some kind of friendless basement dweller they decided to take pity on.
>When you said, 'technically speaking,' you meant REAL friends.
>There's people you talk to, people you know, of course.
>Then there's ACTUAL friends, who actually know who you are as a person, pay that one cent you're missing, and don't just see you as happy all the time.
>-God, that sounds gay.
>But in that sense, you really did have no friends.
>And you don't think these two know what that means in your own sense.
"I didn't really live an unhappy life, though. I was content with what I had, and it was fine."
>A smile crosses your face.
"Just me, my bed, and my PC."
>-And a special sock in the corner.
>But they don't need to know about that.
>"Well, what other cool things did you have?"
>You pause and think.
>Well, 'cool' is a general term.
>Frankly, you would find a bird shitting on someone's head cool.
>But you guess you can try the easy things.
>If they find forks that twirl spaghetti on its own cool, they'll practically find everything you tell them cool.

>>28268631
ayyyyyyy there you are

>>28268631
"Well, computers and the internet is practically what started making everything more advanced. We were on the brink of having self-driving cars and hoverboards and stuff like that."
>"What's a car?"
>In your peripherals, Brave takes a big gulp of her drink and almost breaks the glass when she sets it down, that burn obviously getting her pretty good.
>You simply lift another finger to get the bartender's attention, but she's already seen Brave dying for long enough, and she gets what you were going to ask her for anyways.
>A glass of water is slid over to the dying mare, and she quickly brings it to her lips.
>You and Vannie kinda just watch.
>For a few seconds, she just gulps all that shit down, then lets out a sigh.
"…You alright?"
>She meekly nods her head.
>"Y-yes sir."
>Man, either she's got some shit to forget, or really just doesn't know how to handle a drink.
>Or you know, both.
>Once you feel she's not going to die, you casually take another sip and clear your throat.
"Well, simply put Vannie, a car is a motorized carriage."
>"Motorized?"
>You nod.
"Nobody needs to pull it, and it's got a piece of machinery that works to move itself. You get a wheel to steer it, pedals to move and stop it, and it's completely enclosed, like a kind of capsule, I guess."
>Vannie just looks completely awestruck.
>And Brave is looking at you, though her mind seems to be elsewhere, a focused or thinking expression plastered on her face.
>Probably thinking about getting a new drink or something.

>>28268696
Keep it going friend.

>>28267974
Kek

>>28268696
Brave is such a cutie.

>>28269922
i wish to pet the guardsmare

>>28267826
That colour scheme a shit.

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>>28262438
Thanks Vannie, Heres the pic of Best Brave.

I'm still not overly happy with it but I decided to just finish in and move on. Hope y'all love her.

>>28272372
Nigga I never sleep
To quote the Geto Boyz
"Up three-sixty-five ayo 24/7
Cause real gangsta-ass niggas don't sleep"

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>>28272372

>>28272420
what is this, a flying squirrel?

>>28272617
I forget. I used to know, but now it escapes me.

>>28268696
TELL HER ABOUT BANE AND WHY HE WEARS THE MASK

>>28272617
>>28272715
Google says sugar glider.

>>28272730
Thank you. I just found it myself too.

A few of you were reading Careful Watch, it'll be updated but might be a day or two.

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>>28273432

>>28272372
holy shit, what a cutie

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>>28273432

>>28273432
A day or two? You're killin me man. I need my fix of Careful.

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>>28272372

Yes, I'm bored

Keep up cute art m8

>>28274164
Oh man, she's in severe need of a cuddling.

>>28274164
we need to be seeing her nice (long)? hair pocking out from under her helmet

>>28274164
yes, i need more of second best guardpone

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>>28275717

>>28274164
Now that its coloured i can see the mistakes i made. The alignment of the plume is all fucked up. Also as another Anon mentioned i had the opportunity to add some of her mane under the right side of the helmet. I might tweak this.

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>>28268211
Sorry for the lack of green. Between taking care of a foster dog and college shit, I haven't been able to write /anything/.

Things are starting to calm down, though, and I'm currently reading pic related to get back into the mood.

>https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4-pq3uRuN9c&index=101&list=PLxoOpZa54NksiD8p9EWkcgt81eotkv-Xv plays just as I type this up
Dammit...

>You take a deep breath and rest your chin on a palm.
"For the last time, I don't need a stupid guard. And to be honest, if someone wants to assassinate me, I'd be more than happy to oblige them."
>"It's tradition that every important guest here at Canterlot be assigned the appropriate number of royal guards to ensure their safety," Celestia says, sitting opposite you at the table. "All the other ambassadors have their escorts. No one's going to give you weird looks if you have your own."
>You know.
>A minotaur has a whole army behind his ass.
>He's probably behind their ass, too, from the way he hungrily eyed them.
"It's not about that. Look, I just..."
>You take a deep breath.
"Can't you just give my guards to someone else? I'm a big fan of my own personal privacy, you know? Don't want to have a tiny horse looking right into my eyes as I'm taking my morning dump."
>Celestia seems unfazed by the crude remark as she sips her tea.
>Her sister, on the other hand, stifles a small laugh.
>"You won't even know that they're with you."
"Uh huh."
>"And besides. Someone needs to keep an eye on you. Heaven knows how many...incidents you've been involved in so far."
>She's referring to those times you've tried to get yourself fired as an ambassador.
>Graffiti on the walls.
>Cake smeared across the throne.
>Chickens in one of the guests' bedrooms.
>Femanon's bedroom, to be more precise.
>That stuck up sloot.
>But you get it.
"Let me guess. It's not for my protection. You need me to be babysat."
>"No," Celestia says.
>"Yes," Luna says at the same time.
>They look at each other, Luna still trying to hold back a grin.
>"Well, yes and no," Celestia says, turning back to you. "So you understand that this isn't a request. This is required."
>Required, your ass.
"You can't do this."
>"It is already done."
>Celestia calls to whoever's outside.
>"You may come in now."

>>28276294
>You turn to look at the parting double doors, revealing a single pegasus standing at the ready with a deadpan expression.
>White coat.
>Blueish mane.
>Typical royal guard armor.
>Typical royal guard look.
"Where's the rest?"
>"Oh, did I refer to your protection as 'they?'" Celestia asks. "I meant she, as in Copper Wing."
>Copper Wing?
>Nothing about her is copper.
>Your copper-less new escort salutes.
>"Reporting for duty, Your Highness!"
>"Copper Wing here will make sure that you, and Canterlot for that matter, will survive this Olympic summit in one piece."
>Hold the phone.
>Everyone else gets two or more guards to accompany them wherever they go.
>But you get ONE?
"Wait a minute. One guard? ONE GUARD?"
>"Well, you did want no guards at all. So I thought, why not compromise?"
"B-but what if I get attacked by multiple assassins at once?"
>"I'm certain that Copper Wing would be more than capable of fending off such an attempt at your life, despite her short tenure as a royal guard."
>Celestia gives a tiny smirk.
>"And besides, I thought that if someone wanted to assassinate you, you'd be more than happy to oblige them."
>You open your mouth to respond, but nothing comes out.
>She got you.
>Clever girl.
>In an attempt to save face, you stand up with an air of indignance.
"You're a very rude horse princess. You know that?"
>And you hurriedly rush out of the room with Copper trailing right behind you.
____________________
"Look, I don't care what you do. Just don't follow me, okay?"
>"No, sir."
"What do you mean, 'no?' You are to follow my orders, right?"
>"Yes, sir."
"Then this is my order to you. Don't follow me."
>"No, sir."
"Pretty please?"
>"No, sir."
>Stupid Cop.
>That's what you should call her from now on.
>Because she's the anti-fun police or something.

>>28276294
YES

>>28276301
>You take a deep breath as you look around the crowded hallway.
>Members of different species are wandering about, taking in the admittedly admirable Canterlot architecture.
>Gryphons, minotaurs, and humans intermingle and shoot the shit.
>What a waste of time.
>You just want to go home and never come back to this shiny, magical place of torment.
>It's like one moment, you hear that contact has been made with an alien species.
>The next thing you know, you're partly responsible for continuing friendly relations with the mysterious talking beings of a land they call 'Equestria.'
>Why you?
>Blame your upper class parents and their stupid ambitions they have on your behalf.
>But that's enough exposition for now.
"Is there anything that would convince you to leave me alone for at least five minutes? What do you want? Money? Fame? Power? I mean, I don't have any of those but come on! There has to be something!"
>"My duty is to protect you, sir. What I want is irrelevant."
>You collapse onto a nearby chair and rub your tired eyes.
"Ugh. Kill me."
>"No, sir."
>Think, Anon. Think.
>You have to get rid of this horse if you ever want to taste freedom again.
>She doesn't seem keen on giving you that chance, though.
>But what if you somehow managed to get away from her?
>Make her fail at doing her job?
>Then maybe she'd get fired, and they'll assign you a new guard.
>And then you'll get that guard fired, and keep going until they give up and let you be on your own.
>But what if Sunbutt assigns even more guards to you?
>It's a risk you'll have to take for the sake of freedom.
>Truly no cause is nobler than yours.
>Scanning around, you spot a booth handing out complimentary cups of coffee.
>Bingo.
>Time to earn your Academy Award for Best Actor.
>Putting on an expression of pain, you slouch lower into your chair, making sure to make audible groans.
>Copper seems to buy it, leaning forward with a panicked expression.
>"Is something the matter, sir?"

>>28276310
"Oh, dear Copper, my friend. I find myself to be at the entrance to death's door."
>Her eyes widen, and she starts to look around as if trying to find something.
>"What happened? Are you sick? Did someone poison you? We need to get help right away!"
>You feebly cough into a shaking hand.
"Copper, my loyal servant. Listen to me."
>"Help! Someone help!"
>You grab her sides and drag her in.
"Listen to me!" you say in a hushed whisper. "I can be saved yet. For us humans need sustenance to survive."
>"Are y-you starving to death?" she asks, her breathing unsteady.
"I'm afraid so, my sweet, sweet Copper. You see, we humans rely on a specific nutrient found both in our world and yours. It is our life essence. Many a song has been written about this sweet, pure substance that has given life to mankind, dating as far back as..."
>What the fuck are you rambling on about?
>Get to the point.
>You shake your head.
"Anyways, what I'm trying to say is, I'm gonna die unless you get me a cup of coffee."
>"W-what?"
>You set her down and turn her around to face the booth.
"Coffee, you id--...my friend. Get me some or I will die."
>"Coffee, coffee, coffee," she repeats to herself as she looks around.
>Then she finally seems to make the connection in her head.
>"Coffee! You need coffee!"
>You try your best to not roll your eyes.
>"I'll get you some right away! Don't move, sir!"
"Take your time," you say, your voice barely a whisper now.
>She immediately leaps into the air and flies over to the booth.
>"One cup of coffee, please!" she says to the colt in charge.
>"You'll have to wait in line like everyone else," he replies monotonously.
>"No, you don't understand! This is an emergency! Someone's going to die if I don't get him coffee!"
>"So what? I'm gonna die if I don't get mine either!" A baggy-eyed gryphon in line shouts at her. "If you want a cup, you can wait in line like the rest of us!"
>"B-but..."
>"No buts," the colt says. "You either get in line, or you get out."

>>28276316
>This is too rich.
>Copper looks over at you with visible concern, and you wave with an unsteady hand.
>Hopefully she doesn't see the smile you're trying to suppress.
>She turns back to try to reason with the colt in charge, much to the annoyance of everyone else.
>That'll keep her occupied.
>Now's your chance.
>In one smooth motion, you slide down on all fours to keep a low profile.
>Some passerby give you odd looks, but otherwise don't pay much mind.
>And so you crawl away from your unaware captor who's trying to save your dear life.
>A part of you feels bad for betraying her trust, but the victory is more than worth it.
>Mission accomplished.
____________________
>It's really dark and cramped in here.
>Not really your ideal place to let loose and do nothing.
>But it's so nice to have alone time.
>Just you and your thoughts.
>You can do and say anything you want without being watched.
>Or worrying about being judged.
>Or lectured at by his parents for being a leech without any trace of ambition who needs to get his act together if he wants to continue living under a roof and not a cardboard box.
>Yep. This is the life.
>Those stupid princesses and their dumb rules.
>Protection, your ass.
>You wonder what Copper's doing right now.
>Maybe she's panicking out of her mind, her life flashing before her eyes as she desperately searches for you.
>Maybe she took the hint and went off to do her own thing, fully confident that you can take care of yourself.
>Maybe she's--
>The doors swing open, blinding you with bright light.
>You bring up a hand to shield your unprepared eyes, but you aren't prepared for the ear-splitting scream that follows moments later.
>"Anon! What the fuck are you doing here?" Femanon shrieks.
"Hey! Shhhh!"
>"No! Don't 'shhhhhh' me! What are you doing in my closet?"
"I'm hiding, okay?"
>Femanon puts her hands on her hips.
>"Oh yeah? From what? Your insecurities?"
>Oh ha ha.
>She's a riot.

>>28276321
"My guard. Now shhhhh! Or else she might hear you!"
>"Whatever, asshole. Get the fuck out of my room, you creep."
"I wasn't creeping, you cunt!"
>Two guards burst into the room.
>"Miss! Is everything okay?"
>Femanon turns around.
>"Yeah. There was an asshole in my room. But he's just about to see himself out."
>The guards exit the room and close the door.
>You turn around to re-enter your quiet place.
>"Where the fuck do you think you're going?"
"To safety. I'm gonna hide in here until everything clears out."
>"Like hell you are. Get out or my guards will make you. Why can't you hide in your own room?"
"Are you stupid? That's where she'll loo--"
>Someone knocks on the door.
>Uh oh.
>That might be her.
"If that's someone named Copper Wing, then tell her that I'm not here! I'll owe you one!"
>And with that, you slam yourself inside Femanon's closet.
>"I'm not-- oh for Pete's sake."
>She sighs.
>You press an ear against the door to eavesdrop.
>The door opens.
>"What do you want?"
>"I'm sorry to bother you, but I'm here to look for a human by the name of Anonymous," a familiar, out of breath voice says. "Do you by any chance know where he is?"
>Shit.
>"Anonymous? Oh gee, that asshole?" Femanon says rather sarcastically. "I have NO idea where that waste of space is. Where could he possibly be?"
>You hear footsteps coming closer to your hideout, and you hold your breath, lest they hear you.
>Please no.
>"He's definitely not in this room. No, ma'am. What a surprise it would be if he was actually hiding in this specific room."
>You have no idea what to do at this point.
>The closet door suddenly swings open, causing you to fall flat on your face in the main room.
>Ouch.
>"Oh, what's this? Anonymous was here the entire time? Who could have guessed?"
>You look up to see Femanon with a triumphant smirk on her face.
>Is this payback for the chickens?
>Because that wasn't personal.

>>28276332
>On the other hand, Copper doesn't look too pleased.
>She looks down at you with an expression you can't quite read.
>But you're certain it's somewhere between contempt and silent rage.
>One of her hooves is holding a styrofoam cup.
"Oh, uhh, you got my coffee."
>No response.
>The tension is killing you.
>Reminds you of home.
"I'll take that. Th-thanks."
>You gingerly grab the cup from her motionless hoof and take a sip.
>The cup is half empty, and the contents lukewarm.
>Judging from the stains on her armor and coat, she must've been searching for you in quite the frenzy.
>Nothing but silence fills the room as you slowly drain the tiny cup, Femanon and Copper continuing to look down at you.
>Finally, you finish and wipe your mouth with a sleeve.
"Thanks for saving my life. I f-feel better already. H-heh..."
>You hold out the empty cup for your guard to accept, but she doesn't move.
>"Anonymous?"
"Yeah?"
>"Humans don't need coffee to survive. Am I right?"
"I, uhhh..."
>"You're right," Femanon says. "Here's a helpful tip. Don't believe anything that comes out of Anon's mouth. I learned that the hard way."
"Look, Fem. If it's about the chickens..."
>"It's not about the chickens!"
"I wasn't lying when I said that I didn't know that they liked to use fabric for their nests."
>"I just told you that it's not about the stupid chickens!"
>Copper eyes the two of you cautiously.
>Well, this is getting awkward.
"Okay, okay," you say, slowly getting up on your legs. "I see that you're upset. I'll get out of your hair."
>"Please do."
"Alright. I'm going to slowly and peacefully walk out of your quarters without any incident or--"
>And you break into a sprint out of the room and down the hall.
>Copper is the first to recover from the surprise.
>"Son of a--" she mutters under her breath.
>And she takes off after you with her wings.
>Femanon takes a deep breath and pinches the bridge of her nose.
>"Of all the possible choices, they HAD to pick him."

>>28276339
____________________
>After what feels like an eternity, you turn a corner and stop running, resting your hands on your knees.
>Your chest aches.
>Your legs are sore.
>Sweat is dripping down your forehead.
>And honestly? You feel like taking a nice nap.
>At this point, you don't even know what you hope to achieve.
>That pegasus will find you sooner or later.
>And from the way you betrayed her, she'd probably never fall for one of your clever ruses again.
>Stupid Cop.
>Stupid Sunbutt.
>Stupid Fem.
>Stupid summit.
>You just want to be left alone for once in your life.
>Is that too much to ask?
>Getting back into an upright position, you continue walking down whatever hallway you're at, but stop at the sound of hooves to your side.
>You turn to see Copper standing next to you.
>She looks mildly annoyed and smug at the same time.
>That's an emotion you've never seen before.
"W-what? How?"
>"It is my duty to accompany and protect you, and you can't change that, sir."
"I order you to go shove a massive rod up your ass!"
>And you take off into a desperate sprint away from your oppressor.
>She easily catches up to you in the air.
>You can feel the beat of her wings against your face as she flies by your side.
>"I would advise you not continue going down this path, sir."
>Was that literal or metaphorical?
>Either way, you're not listening.
>A door comes into view, and you pump your last remaining bits of energy into your legs in hopes of somehow losing her in what lies beyond there.
>"Sir, I repeat. I urge you to stop."
"You can't tell me what to do!"
>"Do you even know where you're going, sir?" Copper says with waning restraint. "Huh?"
"Fuck...you," you say between breaths.
>You finally reach the door, grabbing the handle and using your momentum to swing it open.
>Bright, natural light momentarily floods your vision, causing you to squint.
>But even with the sudden change in brightness, you catch sight of what appears to be the railing of a balcony.
>Aw, shit.

>>28276346
>You try to stop, but you're going too fast.
>And the next thing you know, you're looking directly at the ground, the wind rushing at your face.
>Your mind and body seem to detach as your life flashes before your eyes.
>So this is how it ends, huh?
>It's fitting in a way.
>You wanted freedom.
>And freedom is what you're gonna get, though not the way you quite expected.
>A distant scream can be heard, but you don't know if that's your own.
>Some ponies on the ground stare up at you in disbelief, frozen in place as they watch the first human to ever kill himself in a stupid manner in Equestria.
>Suddenly, something warm and soft grips your arm.
>At first, you think it's an angel guiding you towards the great beyond.
>But you look up to see Copper holding on to you with all her strength, her wings beating furiously in hopes of slowing your fall.
>Hold the phone.
>You're not dead yet.
>You instinctively grab on to her hooves with both hands, your legs now dangling in the air as your guardian captor tries to save you.
>Sweat beads on her forehead, and she looks like she's going to explode if she tries any harder.
>Despite her small frame, you can actually feel yourself decelerating.
>Holy shit.
>You might actually live.
>You might not be the first human to die in a stupid--
>Suddenly, your back impacts a large wooden barrel, knocking the wind out of you.
>You're too stunned to move as your body slides off and onto yet another barrel, this time landing on your stomach.
"Ooof!"
>One more fall and you're on solid ground.
>You'd kiss it, but you're not exactly that thankful to be alive right now.
>A couple curious ponies trot up to you.
>"Is he dead?"
>"I don't know. Do you see any blood?"
>"What color do they bleed?"
>"It's purple, right?"
>Copper lands in front of you and shoves her way between a couple curious bystanders.
>She's breathing really heavily.
>"Sir..." she says, then pausing to swallow. "Are you alright, sir?"
"Ugh," you feebly reply.

>>28276360
>"Oh, thank Celestia," she says, allowing herself to smile before remembering that she's upset at you.
"You've made my life a living hell. You know that?"
>You're too winded to say anything more.
>Copper wipes some sweat off her forehead.
>Out of the corner of your eye, you see that one of the barrels you crashed into has spilled some fireworks onto the ground.
>You look around to find that you're actually surrounded by them, all neatly categorized by size and type.
>Must be for the picnic later tonight.
>Good thing they're not lit or anything.
>Except for that one unattended sparkler that's dangerously close to a group of missile-shaped fireworks.
>Someone must've dropped it when you crash landed.
>Not good.
"Eh ferwer," you weakly say, trying to warn Copper about the imminent threat to everyone's safety.
>"What?" she says.
"Eh fuggeh furweh."
>Copper puts an ear close to your mouth.
>"Say that again, sir?"
>But it's too late.
>The sparkler ignited not one, but multiple lines of the soon-to-be-lethal weapons
>As soon as those flames reach their destination, then...
"Uh oh."
>"Uh oh? What's that supposed to mean?"
>A loud scream and hiss fill the air, followed my more just like it.
>Copper turns around to find the source of the noise.
>Her ears drop.
>"Uh oh."
>The missiles fly randomly through the air, some of them exploding above ground into a pretty assortment of glowing colors.
>The rest, well...
>Anything's and everything's a target now.
>Ponies.
>Non-ponies.
>Trees.
>Windows.
>Everyone starts screaming and running for cover as World War F begins in the Canterlot Gardens.
>A band starts to play the Equestrian national anthem for some reason.
>Copper hoists you up.
>"We need to get out of here, sir! Now!"
>Your strength finally returns to you, and you follow her lead.
>However, one large firework catches your eye.
>It's huge.
>And you mean HUGE.
>And of fucking course, it's already lit.
"Fuck me."
>"I beg your pardon, sir?"

>>28276372
>A large scream pierces the air as the military-grade firework shoots straight into the sky...
>...towards one of the parked blimps idling over Canterlot.
>Fortunately no one's inside it.
>You think.
>But who knows?
>Maybe it'll miss.
>Spoilers.
>It doesn't.
>Fire and smoke suddenly burst out of the crumpling envelope as the firework hits its mark.
>Onlookers gasp and scream as they witness Equestria's Hindenburg come slowly crashing towards the earth.
>As terrible as it is, you have to admit that the scene is kinda pretty.
>Almost poetic.
>The blimp lands in an empty patch of grass, fire now engulfing most of the once proud airship.
>Sirens can be heard in the distance.
>The two of you watch the whole scene unfold in silence.
>Copper's now sitting on the grass, mouth slightly agape.
>Yep, the both of you are so fucked.
>Suddenly, the sound of shuffling armor can be heard approaching.
>You turn around to see a small group of guards headed your way.
"Here comes the fuzz."
>Copper sees them as well, and jumps up to attention.
>The leader of the group comes forward, and he does not look happy.
>"PRIVATE. WHAT IS GOING ON HERE?"
>Copper seems to shrink.
>"Uh, I...Sir, I, umm..."
>"ARE YOU RESPONSIBLE FOR THIS?"
>"Well, you see, sir..."
>"I've been getting messages nonstop that Canterlot's experiencing a domestic attack! DO YOU REALIZE WHAT KIND OF JEOPARDY YOU PUT US ALL IN?"
>Copper's in a clearly visible state of shock.
>She looks at you, but you're too off-guard to say anything yourself.
>Her superior sighs and turns to you.
>"I apologize for her behavior. I'll see to it that she receives the appropriate punishment for her irresponsible actions. Chances are that she'll be dishonorably discharged by the end of the week."
>He turns to your ex-guard.
>"Follow me."
>The leader turns and marches away.
>Copper follows suit, her head hanging low and ears drooping downward.

>>28276379
>You watch them go, simply standing there as the chaos continues in the background.
>This is good, right?
>You somehow managed to get rid of your anti-fun guard.
>Meaning that it's time to move on with the next step of your master plan.
>She really does look heartbroken, though.
>From the way she hunted you down, you figured that she'd be more of a fighter.
>That she'd at least try to defend herself against the heinous crimes that you unintentionally committed.
>Don't feel bad, Anon.
>It happens.
>There's nothing you can do.
>Right?
>Don't think about it.
>Don't you dare--
>You take a deep breath and catch up to Copper's superior, stepping in front of him to block his path.
"Wait a minute."
>He and the rest of the guards halt.
>"Is there anything I can help you with, sir?"
>You're actually doing this, aren't you?
>You big, pathetic softie.
"Maybe you shouldn't punish Copper Wing for what happened today."
>Copper looks up at you.
>She seems as equally confused as her superior.
>The leader cocks his head to the side.
>"Sir?"
"It's not her fault that, uhh, you know..."
>You make an explosion gesture with your hands with an added sound effect.
"She actually..." you say, scratching the back of your head. "She actually saved my life. I'm the one who did it. All of it. And she...shouldn't be punished for that."
>A pause.
>"So what you're telling me is that you're the one who caused what happened back there?"
>You mindlessly kick the ground.
"Yeah. You can tell Celestia that. I doubt she'll be surprised."
>More silence.
>If the guard in front of you is any bit furious, he is really good at hiding it.
>"I...see."
>He turns to Copper.
>"Private? Escort Anonymous to his room. Don't let him out until all this clears up."
>Grounded.
>And with that, he and his troops walk away, leaving you with your unfired guard.
>Welp.
>You dodged a bullet, only to shoot yourself in the foot.
>Or head, depending on how Sunbutt's going to take this.

>>28276388
>Copper slowly walks up to you, as though unsure if she's dreaming.
>"Did you just...save me?"
>You give her a weak smile.
"Yeah. I can't let you steal the credit for my accomplishments. But, uhh, thanks. For not letting me become a pancake."
>She looks back to examine the carnage.
>The fire department's at the scene now, evacuating guests and saving what they can of the blimp.
>"Thanks...for letting me keep my job."
"So...we're square?"
>"Not even close," she says, the fatigue visible in her voice. "But it's a step in the right direction."
>Her job for your life?
>Yeah.
>Not exactly a fair trade.
"Well, I'm going to enjoy what could possibly be my last night in Equestria by passing out in my bed."
>"Let me escort you."
>You sigh.
"Not like I ever had a choice to begin with. Alright. Let's go."
>"Yes, sir."
>Looks like the 'sir' is back.
>The two of you walk towards the castle entrance.
>Your entire body is sore, but at this point you don't care anymore.
>You've already accepted defeat.
"I don't think we've ever made proper introductions. I'm Anonymous, but people call me 'Anon.'"
>"Name's Copper Wing, but ponies call me 'Copper.'"
"Pleasure to meet you."
>She doesn't respond.
"Pleasure to meet you too, Anon," you say, doing your best impression of Copper's voice.
>"I hope it is, sir."
>Close enough.

>>28276396
aw yiss, all this green

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>>28276396
Go on

>>28276396
Pretty good but.
>fem anon

You wouldn't be one of those degenerates that like >no hooves would you?

>>28277070
Femanon is too rare desu

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I was bored so I did a serious bat.

>>28277211
I dig it
Practice lots yo

>>28276074
Alright, thanks for the update, anon

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>>28276294
>>Her sister, on the other hand, stifles a small laugh.
luna a cute

>>28277211
This bat is way too serious, she needs a boopin'.

>>28277085
For good reason.

does anyone have the link to the stories where anon is given the position of ambassador and a complement of guards as a joke from luna/celestia and ends up fucking the guards?

>>28277908
Pure boner fuel.
http://pastebin.com/9WeeGgq7

>>28277946
>http://pastebin.com/9WeeGgq7
than kyou

>>28277991
>than kyou
ok i think its time to go to sleep, i can read it tomorrow

>>28276396
Keep going

Gimme some mare guard molestation stories

>>28276396
I was cackling as Anon brought hell upon Canterlot.

The atrocities our green buddy commits against Equestria need to be bigger, louder and draw more exasperated sighs more often.

>>28278619

>>28278678
Thank you good sir

>>28278678
Hot.

I want a bat pony guard to watch late night movies with

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>>28276321
>Femanon
And like that you've lost me

>>28277070
Keep going
Hope femanon gets some pony dick

>>28276396
Would still probably lose her job, or at least guard duty to Anon, since it was her job to prevent shit like that, and she failed miserably on her first day.

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Brave is at it again! This time her target is the unsuspecting Vannie.

Meanwhile, Anon is sitting beside the bed just staring. After all hes a massive cuddlecuck

I love these two ponies they are so cute to draw. I think however I'm going to catch up on the Careful Watch story and maybe draw a sketch or two of her.

>>28279806
>cuddlecuck

kek

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>>28279806
Too cute

>>28279806
l-lewd

>>28279806
I want to cuddle them both AT THE SAME TIME.

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>All this batcancer

>>28277085
True
I like femanon stories

>>28268696
>
>You take another sip.
>Okay, you're starting to get a little drunk, here.
>Not super drunk, but drunk.
>Like, on a scale of nuthin to drunk, you're probably at a place, like, somewhere in the middle.
>Or something.
>"So, why does he wear the mask?"
>You pause your drinking and start to snicker.
>Vannie just seems confused at what you find funny.
>Oh, the memes.
>Oh man oh man, the memes.
>You shrug, retarded smile still plastered on your face.
"You'd have to watch the movie to find out."
>"-That's not fair! We don't even have movies here!"
>She scrunches.
>God, that's so cute.
"Man, you ponies are so adorable when you're angry."
>She pauses with a blush, then scrunches harder.
>All you can manage is a wheezing laugh.
>In the meantime, you lean back and rest your head in what would be Brave's lap.
>Still don't know these horse anatomy words.
>You look up at her.
"You know, you're being really silent for someone still living."
>She glances down at you, obviously tipsy.
>"Sorry sir, just thinking."
>And now you're curious.
"About?"
>She looks down at you for a moment, as if silently wondering whether she should talk to you.
>"...It's nothing, sir."
"Oh come on, it'll be something eventually."
>"...Nothing, sir."
>With a long, obnoxious groan, you lift your head back up and sit normally.
>-But not before wobbling a bit and catching yourself.

>>28281257
Thanks mate

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Writefriends, please tell when you finished, and thanks for your work.

>>28281257
>Vannie's sucking down another appletini when you look up.
>Hot damn, she really loves those things.
>Your stomach derails your train of thought with its annoying whining.
>Yep, you're goddamn hungry.
"Man, I got the munchies. You guys got the munchies?"
>Vannie stops and quickly nods her head.
"-Well, I know YOU do. You look like you could destroy an entire kitchen."
>She smiles and nods, before fully realizing what you said.
>Instead of scrunching and hitting you back with something like you'd expect, her ears droop.
"Ah, lighten up Vannie, it's just food. Just be glad you don't have a gut because of it."
>-Nope, because all of it went somewhere else, instead.
>A place that you vastly approve of.
>-Alrighty, don't think about that, Anon.
>You lean back again onto Brave.
"So then, whatchu say? Food sound good?"
>She pauses, then nods.
>Another smile crosses your face.
"Awesooome. And I think I know just where to go!"
>When you sit back up, you hear more hooves moving towards you.
>And before you can spin around-
>"-Can I buy you a dr-"
>"-Not interested, buzz off."
>You only get a quick glimpse at the guy before he sniffles and walks off.
>What a loser.
"Goddamn Vannie, you've sure been popular today."
>She simply nods.
>"Always am."
>You respond with a nod of your own.
>Then you notice how she said that.
>That wasn't a cocky, smug, 'always am.'
>That was like, a depressed, tired, 'always am.'
>You can even hear the difference in your head.
>And before you can question it, she lifts her wing up and exposes a little bag of bits, then takes it off and puts-
"-No, I'll pay, Vannie. Don't worry about it."
>She almost completely ignores you and places it on the counter anyways.

Brave should do something embarrassing and unprofessional like accidentally let out a belch or fart when she gets drunk.

>>28281632
>fart
Jesus Christ please leave

>>28281533
why are they so adorable

>>28281651
What? It would be cute to see her get all flustered over something like that.

>>28281533
Oh god, Blu, you drive me to drink... again... All your beautiful bar descriptions.

>>28281651
>thinking just because someone mentions farting it must be their fetish

>>28281651
Everything is adorable when ponies do it, even burping and passing gas.

>>28281691
you guys are so easy, it's almost no fun
>inb4 damage control

>>28281651
>>28281691
It's a well known fact that guardmare farts smell like various baked goods.

Brave's smell like freshly baked cinnamon rolls.

>>28260908
>>28260769
These look like such high quality works. It makes me rage with depression and desire because the real MLP will never be quality-driven.

>>28281769
Then what do Vannie's smell like?

>>28281790
(You) 4 (You)

>>28281816
I dunno. Some kind of fruit pie.

>>28281533
moar

>>28281790
It has been, but during season 6 the time constraints and deadlines have been tighter. Which is why it came so early. Maybe the budget too, since a lot seems to be going towards the movie. Honestly, it can go without that pop star cameo.

Saving bump

>>28281632
>belch or fart
That would be rather disgusting.
Simple hiccups after all the drinking would suffice. Being super cute while doing it goes as a nice bonus.

>>28281769
It's also a well known fact that you are a huge faggot.

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>>28283001
Oh god.
You trying to kill people with that?

>>28283001
>Brave and Vannie both get a bad case of the hiccups
>Anon tries to scare/startle it out of them
>unintentionally makes them both cry

>>28283147
more like
>tries to scare them
>gets instinctively punched in the face
>he cries

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>>28283147
Oh my gosh

>>28281533
Poor Vannie. I wish we could help her some how.

>she thinks anon is a cuddleslut

Something must be done.

>>28281533
>Christ, polar opposites or not, these two are still stubborn as all hell.
>You grab the bits and hand it back to her.
"I get free money from the Princess. You paying for this is kind of just a waste."
>You're pretty much getting the ponyland version of welfare, really.
>Though it's a lot, and for a completely different reason.
>And, you didn't need to fill out forms and shit.
>...And you're not black.
>After some hesitation, Vannie takes the bag back and straps it under her wing again.
>You finish your drink and wait as the two do the same.
>Brave slurps it down and immediately looks like she's regretting it.
>She starts coughing and practically dying, signaling the bartender pony nearby.
"Jesus, at least try to survive a week, yeah?"
>When she gets a glass of water, she nods.
>You hop off your chair and help them both on the ground.
>Vannie immediately starts staggering off to the side, wings beating lightly at different paces.
>You catch her from falling on her back, then hop over and have to help Brave from faceplanting, just from standing.
"Man, you guys are lightweights."
>-Well, you also didn't get it straight like Brave did, but Vannie even asked for less alcohol.
>She just happened to drink like, thirty of them.
>Those fruity drinks, man.
>That's how they getcha.
>You fish around and just give the bartender a bag of bits.
>You hate having to carry these damn things around like this.
>Either have higher bit values, or just make cards a damn thing already.
>These are slacks, but it may as well be shit used for the military, with all these pockets.
>The mare just nods, and you give a late nod in response.
>Taking a moment to process things, here.
"Alrighty guys, come hitler! No, wait, it's hither- hither, right?"
>Your guards just give you a confused look.
"Eh, let's just go."
>And so, with the help of some chairs, you stumble back outside.
>"-Don't die, Anon!"
"Y-you too."

>>28284444
carry them anon
you know you want to

>>28284444
QUADS DEMAND: Carry the guardpones!

>>28284444
>The sun's starting to go down, thankfully.
>It just reminds you how pretty damn unproductive you were today.
>You pop your back and look over your shoulder to see both Vannie and Brave stuck in the doorframe.
>Their armor is stuck and holding them both up.
>Yep, these are the ones the Princesses entrusted with your life.
>Just stuck in the doorframe of a bar.
>Vannie slowly paddles with her hooves, trying to break free.
>Brave just stays still, an annoyed expression on her face.
>"A little help, sir?"
"Help? I was just planning on leaving you both here."
>Vannie scrunches at you.
"Of course I'm going to help. What kinda person you think I am?"
>You grab Brave's hooves and try to pull.
>...Nothing.
>How the hell did they manage to end up like this in the five seconds you were turned away?
>You try again.
>...Nope.
>See, and if it wasn't the fucking armor itself that's stuck, you'd just be able to get butter or something.
>You stand there for a moment, thinking of what you can do.
>If you pull too hard, you might just lose your arms or something.
>And the way they're stuck, it doesn't look like you'd be able to push them back inside.
>You think for a moment, before your eyes trail over to a door inside the bar.
>The back door.
"...Hang on."
>You jog over to the other side of the bar, trying your hardest to stay in a straight line.
>Needless to say, you almost ran into a few things in that short walk around.
>You pop in through the back and see that nobody's even noticed the two stuck there.
>Where the door is, there's really no way for anyone to see.
>Which, is uh... kinda good.
>Now looking from this side, you see that, well...
>That armor doesn't really cover everything in the back.
>It's more like a goddamn FRAME than anything.
>You turn away when you feel your cheeks burning.
>...Okay, how the fuck are you going to do this?

>>28284547
>>28284598
Yes. Pick them up Anon. Carry them home. Become a cuddleslut.

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>>28284839
>>That armor doesn't really cover everything in the back.
>>It's more like a goddamn FRAME than anything.
>>You turn away when you feel your cheeks burning.
haha
oh my

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>>28284444

>>28281533
>Vannie immediately starts staggering off to the side, wings beating lightly at different paces.

God why are these ponies so adorable.

>>28285275
This.
Fuck, I just wanna snuggle the little fuckers.

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>>28284839
>looking at their naughty bits

>>28284444
>...And you're not black.
WE WUZ KAAAAAAAANGZ

>>28246247
>"No can do, sir!"
"Come on! I insist."
>"I'm on duty!"
"My guest room has been lying untouched since I moved into this place. I want my money's worth!"
>"I'm to guard you until dawn! Can't afford deep sleep. I'll doze on my feet where I can see the door."
>You don't think you're going to win this one.
>Well, no one can say you didn't try to be hospitable.
>Not to say that hospitality's your only motive.
>It'll get on your nerves, knowing there's a horse standing guard right outside your door while you're trying to sleep.
>Well... you have some reading material, at least.
"Fine. But you're missing out."
>"Nope! I'm your guard. I'll be standing..."
>She trots into place, standing between the stairs and the door.
>She lifts her front leg and taps her foot twice on the floor.
>"...right here, making sure nopony unwelcome comes through..."
>She gestures with her hoof at the door.
>"...that door! I'm your guard. It's most important to me that you feel safe."
>...you suppose you feel safe, in addition to your nerves.
>Of course, you felt safe before the Saddle-Arabian incident, too, but, again, you're on the losing side of your current discussion.
"Eh, very well then. I'm off to bed."
>"Good night, sir!"
"Good... good night."

>This Koltien book, it's... it's fucking boring.
>The first one was pretty good. A simple, unadulterated adventure story.
>They went to some place and came back.
>It was fun.
>This one... every new paragraph describes, like, another fucking blade of grass.
>There's a footnote every other page describing some obscure piece of pseudo-historic unicorn lore.
>You force your eyes to scan each line of text in the light of your flickering bedside candle.
>Still, your mind wanders.
>It wanders to the pony standing guard right at the foot of your stairs.
>The pony who, at any moment, might come busting down your door, knocking you out of bed and exclaiming that some night-owl cast a shadow on your window.

>>28286266
grab the little horsie

grab her and bring her to bed

>>28286266
I want to cum inside Careful.

>>28284839
>That armor doesn't really cover everything in the back.
>...Okay, how the fuck are you going to do this?
Slowly with lots of lube please.

>>28284839
>>...Okay, how the fuck are you going to do this?
Obviously by grabbing two great big handfuls of them plush bottoms and pushing.

>>28286266
Dubs means you continue the story

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>>28286452
>>28286447
Remember this?

Being naked all the time. I doubt they would even see anon grabbing handfuls and pressing his face against them as anything even sexual.

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>>28286544
I don't want to go off topic. But i just had to go back rand rewatch that part.

every fucking frame of that is gold,

So I made a thing.

>>28284839
If only I knew how to draw mare bits.
Or anything, for that matter.

>>28273432
Im all caught up with Carefuls story now so hope it continues soon.

>>28287474
Is that a good story?

>>28286266
Binning what I've written so far
pastebin.com/CkZbn3E6

>>28287678
I think its good so far

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bmp

>>28289020
bampu

>>28287474
Careful, Brave and Vannie are cute. Cute!

>>28287467
requesting this

id very much like a lewd view of this scene

>>28284839
>You mean, you're sure you'll be able to push them out, but where are you going to put your hands?
>You never really inspected that part of the armor, but you kinda hoped there was actually a plate or something there.
>Absolutely every place you can put your hands, is one you wouldn't feel comfortable with until you bought them dinner.
>Unless you like, pushed their hind legs?
>...No, that doesn't look like it'll do anything, really.
>You let out a long, drawn out sigh and think.
>That thinking gets interrupted when you hear hooves approaching behind you.
>You hop over to the two and turn around, arms at your side and trying to cover as much of their backsides as you can.
>A stallion comes stumbling around, pausing just to look at you.
"This door is, ah, under maintenance. You'll have to use that one there."
>You point at the back door and watch the guy wobble outside.
>Jesus, you need to fix this NOW.
>You start pushing them with your back.
>Parts of their armor practically dig into it, forcing you to immediately stop and turn back around.
>"Anon, I'm huuungryyy."
>Brave nods in agreement.
"Well, I'm trying, here! And the only real option is one that I'm pretty sure would be uncomfortable for all of us."
>Vannie groans and wiggles around fruitlessly.
>…You're forced to peel your eyes away.
>"Just do whatever it takes, sir."
>You pause while your mind wanders.
>Whatever it takes-
>-No, stop it Anon.
>This is barely the second day, calm yo self.
"...Are you guys, uh, sure about that?"
>Vannie groans again.
>"Yes, who cares! Just get us out!"
>You have to force down a smile.
>-And something else-
"-Uh, a-alright, if y-you say so."
>Slowly shuffling towards them, you can't believe you're actually about to do this shit.
>You wonder what the Princesses would think about this.

>>28291660
My body is ready.

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>>28291660
>you start posting not too long before my lunch break is over.

mfw

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>>28291754
>mfw it's 3 AM and there is new Green posted

>>28291660
In before Vannie meant something totally different and takes Anonymous' actions completely wrong.

>>28291660
>You take a breath and mentally vow to make this quick as possible.
>At least for them.
>It's not like they're asking for this.
>-Well, they kinda did, but you digress.
>You gently put your hands on their rumps, at least making sure not to touch their horse parts.
>Brave lets out a small whinny noise, but they immediately snap back around to you.
>"S-SIR?! W-WHAT ARE YOU DOING?!"
"-I TOLD YOU GUYS IT WOULD BE WEIRD!"
>You start to lean in and push, also trying to push all those lewd thoughts to the back of your mind.
>You wish you were drunker for this.
>And unfortunately, the surface you're working with is too goddamn plush for this.
>You don't feel you're really doing anything here.
>Moving your hands from the further end of their flanks to the closer one, you hope it'll make things easier.
>Vannie throws you looks, trying to look angry, but obviously flustered.
>Brave just tries to look everywhere else, scanning to make sure nobody else is watching.
>Every time Vannie looks back, you have to pretend you're not staring.
>And it's goddamn difficult.
>You could easily knead them like dough.
>But you hold yourself back and just focus on pushing.
>Brave's tail flicks at your face and nearly hits your damn eye.
>And her counterpart's just facing forward with a scrunch, eyes closed in what you can only assume is hot and bothered shame.
>Still trying to seem angry, but it's not happening.
>...After a moment, you think that trying to push them is hopeless.
>Arousing, but hopeless.
>Then you see Vannie's armor move a little forward.
>-Until she jerks it backwards into your hand.
>Goddamn it.
>When you look at how much they've moved, it just looks like you're pushing them together, instead of out of the door.
>That's probably why you haven't gotten anywhere.
>You take another deep breath, then close your eyes.
>Then you move your hand more to their... uh, respective centers.

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>>28292011

>>28292011
>"Sir, guards are not for sexual."
>"S-SIR?!"

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=MWCaRar9F4k

>>28292011
Not to be a party pooper, but couldn't he just put his hands on the piece of armour on their flanks? What are they running around with a completely cut off rears?

>>28292100
U WOT M8?

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>>28292011
We need to call upon the crotch god to ensure a, uh, 'successful release' from the situation.

>>28292011
>anon slips
>ends up fisting both mares accidentally
>they panic and squeeze so hard with their marevag muscles Anon can't escape

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>>28292220
>Imagine this

>but with mares on anon

This is dubs thread now.

>>28292323
Check 'em

>>28292011
>You pull your hands back immediately, looking again at your predicament.
>The trim of the armor around their flanks is damn thin.
>It looks essentially like you'd be pushing a tough piece of paper.
>If that shit hurt just pushing with your back, you doubt your hand would really end up better.
>But seriously, why the hell is there no plate back there?
>You know the ponies don't normally wear clothes, so that might not be there so they can, you know, do their business and shit, but jesus fuck, man.
"...I apologize in advance for this. But I guess that's what dinner is going to be for."
>"J-just hurry u-up."
>You nod and quickly put your hands back where they were just a few seconds ago.
>Immediately, both of them gasp.
>It's short and almost inaudible, but it's there.
>You put your palms on the lowest part where it's a bit more comfortable for you, then push.
>Your feel something touch your hands.
>...You think they just did that horse thing.
>You don't even know what it's called, but you just know that-
>-Okay, FOCUS ANON.

>>28292364
went over the damn limit again, so i cut the posts in half


>You lean in and push the ground with your shoes.
>After a second, they actually move forward a bit.
>Their armor just grinded and shaved off some of that doorframe, but you're still making progress.
>Jesus, they're really wedged in this fucking thing.
>You take a deep breath and charge in again-
>They both get thrown outside, and with how much force you had in you, you go out flying with them and faceplant into the fucking dirt.
>Hard.
>You instinctively prop yourself up with one hand and feel your face with another.
>-And end up smearing some fluids on your face.
"-OH GOD!"
>You try wiping it with your other hand and just manage to throw rocks and dirt into the mix.
>And more of said fluids.
"-FUCK ME, GODDAMN IT!"
>You finally wipe your palms on your slacks, and your face with your suit's arm.
>When you look up, the two are just looking between each other, faces red as all hell with accompanying looks of embarrassment and beads of sweat on them.
>Then you realize what you said.
"-Not LITERALLY!"
>Vannie quickly nods and helps you up.
>You dust yourself off, watch the bar door close on its own, then sigh.
"Okay... I need to get so drunk I don't remember this happened. And if not, let's agree that this never happened at all, alright?"
>They both nod, faces still extremely red.
>A bit weird with coat colors like theirs.
"Alright, good. Now let's get the shit out of here, I'm hungry."

>>28292372
You know, it would have been so much easier if he had just thrust into their backsides with his hips.

>>28292372
>two drunk horny mares
>not taking them home and alternating burying your face under each of their tails

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>>28292419

>>28292445
kek

>>28292445
>AiE story #1256677436836

>>28292364
>>You put your palms on the lowest part where it's a bit more comfortable for you, then push.
>>Your feel something touch your hands.
>>...You think they just did that horse thing.
oh my
OH MY

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>>28276321
>Femanon

>>28292372
They're just so fucking cute.

>>28292372
did
did he just got their juices all over himself

>>28292445
Only one off, ehh.

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>>28272728

>>28292834
(You)

>>28273432
When are you gonna post more careful?

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>>28284839
>That armor doesn't really cover everything in the back.
>It's more like a goddamn FRAME than anything.
>You turn away when you feel your cheeks burning

Summon the drawfag.

>>28292372
>Anon goes home and tries to cook for them while drinking heavily
>Gets distracted by the mares, who also continue to drink, Vannie is teasing Brave about something
>Most of the food burns, little is edible, group is more drunk and hangry
>Catty Mare fight breaks out with anon trying to break it up with hugs
>this goes wrong as Anon is overpowered by the two strong guardpones and hugs are turned into heavy snuggling
>Heavy Snuggling is heightened by bottle of (weak) cinnamon-whiskey passed among them
>Anon still wakes up not remembering how the night ended, cuddled by Brave and she is out of her amor against him and his hand on Vannie's hoof as she groans and mumbles about it being too early

I'm curious where anon is actually leading them to satisfy the munchies. Love this story writefriend.

>>28293170
sounds super cozy

>>28292372
>>28293170
It is at this point I have to ask; is herding a thing in your story, writefag?

>>28293259
hmm, interesting question, to which i respond, i duno gues well sea
but the real question is, would they really be willing to share anon?

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>>28292011
>Arousing, but hopeless.
gaaadamnit lol

>>28292372
Shoulda fingerbanged em.

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>>28294311
Get 'em while they can't fight back
>Each thumb in a pucker and each index finger in a pink
>"S-Sir what.. ah~.. are you doing?!"
Vannie would just enjoy it tho I bet and pretend to be annoyed.

>>28286266
>Right, Careful Watch: the pony who... who insisted on checking all you food for poison.
>The pony who's been tripping over herself all day to make sure that you, of all people, feel safe and happy in a place totally unfamiliar to you.
>...
>The pony whose job you've been belittling all day, trying to make her stop.
>The pony you ditched the first opportunity you got, ducking into your room early in the evening to read.
>The pony of the race of ponies that thrive on socialization and get miserable when they're alone.
>...
>Come on. Do you even know that last one for sure?
>...
>Oh, damn it.
>You flip Koltien shut, get out of bed, throw on some pajama pants and an undershirt, and head downstairs.

>Careful's standing in the living room a few feet from the foot of the stairs, facing the entryway.
>Her head perks up a little as you come down.
>"Sir?"
"S'just me. You wanna...?"
>'talk?' you wanted to finish.
>But... would that be awkward?
>She's just your guard, doing her job for an unusual client.
>Maybe the shit you feel guilty about is just in your head.
>You hear yourself finish:
"glass of water?"
>"Oh. Sure."

>>28294480
It might be awkward at first but if you get into a routine of doing it every night it will be really sweet!

>>28286266
>>28276396
>>28292372
Could you guys PLEASE make pastebins?! It'd be a lot easier to read & save.

man. boards flying tonight. bump

>>28294541
This, new to the thread and I cant read shit since I'm not going back through tons of backlinks and archives.

>>28295850
I believe this pastebin has all of what what posted the last two threads for Blu's story. You'd just need to read what's posted in this thread, then.

>>28296237
>this pastebin
What pastebin?

>>28294541
Careful Watch pastebin:
pastebin.com/CkZbn3E6

>>28296255
fug
http://pastebin.com/YAwe2D7Q

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Instead of pointless bump, I'm posting what I've done so far.
This time I decided to put more effort into It and also I've improved color scheme. Does It look good?

>>28298102
No

>>28298330
Ahaha ^:)

>>28298102
Yes

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>>28298330
>pic related
>>28298102
Looking good, fukken cyoot

Bumparoo

>>28298102
<3 those horses

>>28298102
Why is Vannie drool in the tongue colour?

>>28299494
That's actually blood. She uses those fangs lewdly.

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>>28299524
I think I know why Brave sleeps in armour now

>>28299524
>>28299599
I want to nibble on Vannie's neck to see how she reacts.

>>28299663
She'd take it as a compliment and lift her chin up so you could get a better angle.

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>>28299804
thats kinda hot

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>>28299822
Neck nibbling is very hot~

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>>28299998
But your numbers are not

>>28300068
Oh my gosh if I would have posted a second earlier...

>>28299998
>>28300134
it could have been the birth of a new rarity fetish meme

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>>28300141

>>28292938
The lewd drawfags are ded, they cannot save our frothing loins now.

>>28300373
>lewd drawfags are ded,
I am in a way.

>>28300417
Parts of us all have died anon. That's why we enjoy pony. To distract the parts that are still alive from their fate.

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>>28300373

lewd draw when?

>>28301144
Never

>>28292372
>You walk through the streets at a slow pace.
>You're also all silent.
>Truly a weird experience for everyone.
>And those two aren't faring any better than you.
>Every time you look back, you notice the huge patch of red on both their faces.
>...Maybe a bit of food will fix everything.
>And lots of drinks.
>
>"Hello, welcome to the Garden of Olives, how may I help you?"
"Unlimited bread sticks, a big bottle of wine, and a few moments to look at the menu, please!"
>She pauses, then nods and walks off.
>You're sure she was asking about appetizers or something, but who cares?
>You sit back in your seat and smile.
>Out of all the things that could be transferred between universes, you're pretty glad Olive Garden was one, if only for the breadsticks.
>Like, this place is exactly as the restaurant.
>The two are just glancing around, hooves on the table and a blush still on their cheeks.
>-Jesus, how long does that last?
>Your thoughts are interrupted when a big batch of bread sticks are put down in front of you.
"Aw yiss."
>The girls, instead of engorging on these wonderful beauties, just stare at them.
>Brave bites her lip looking at one.
>...Do they think they can't eat, or what?
>Drunk or not, Brave still waited for orders to sit, which is damn ridiculous, so you wouldn't be surprised.
>But Vannie, too?
>You figured she'd be jumping on this shit by now.
"You guys know you can have breadsticks, right?"
>Brave blinks, while Vannie shakes her head out of nowhere.
>Like they were thinking about something, then got snapped out of it.
>Well, you still have the hopes that food will fix things.
>Usually always does.
>Brave's the first one to snap back to reality, and she grabs a breadstick for herself.
>Vannie just keeps staring.
>With cuddlesluts being a thing, you can't help but wonder what they think of you for earlier.
>But really, the most important part is that you're here now, and not still stuck trying to push two plump rumps out of a doorframe.

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>>28284839
Is there a pastebin for this so I can read this in one place? Forgive me if I'm blind but I'm not in an opportune place to go digging for potentially lewd horsefiction.

>>28301144
:^)

>>28301193
here the current-current pastebin

http://pastebin.com/trwGQY1B

>>28301182
>Garden of Olives
ayy

>>28301412
I wish they had olive garden in UK I've never had them

I think they don't... I may just be stupid

>>28301182
Psst... They want the D

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>>28301312
Radical. Thanks man

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>>28301193

>>28301182
But just how plump were they? I need to know.

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>>28301182
L-lewd

>>28292938
>>28300373

Alright I here you guys. I wanted to see if anyone else would braw some lewd. Ill give this a shot when I get home, could be a while before i deliver.

>>28301735
Thanks, based drawfag.
Just one request: make sure to put plenty of detail on any ponuts you make.

>>28302171
>ponuts
*winking vaginas

>>28301182
Poor girls. They are traumatized.

You must be gentile with the little ponies anon.

>>28302276
Or maybe they just need to be conditioned to enjoy it~

>>28302276
>traumatized
Nah, a bit of shock maybe. I blame the curse of the hands, even the most skilled stallion couldn't do with his hooves what anon just did to thier flanks by accident with his hands.
They were just groped for the first time as part of a species unable to grope.

Anon's accidental lewd potiental is beyond their comprehension... But soon they will learn... >>28302315 has the right idea

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>>28302276
>They are traumatized.
>traumatized
I think you mean turned on out of their minds. You must realize mares are very sexual creatures.

>>28302315
>>28302381
i agree with both of you. But i just help but feel they are both already close to if not already way over their tolerance limit for lewd.

i just don't want to see them hurt.

>>28302443
Mares, especially guard mares, are not for sexual. The story makes this very clear

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>>28302546
You are about to find out how oh so wrong you are.

Rape them please. Be nice about it, but they need a good raping.

>>28302579
silly anon you cant rape the willing

>>28302573
Here's hoping Anon.

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>>28301182
Eating all you can eat breadsticks without washing your hands?
Lewd

>>28294480
>You duck into the kitchen and pour a glass for Careful and yourself.
>You plunk a few ice cubes in each for good measure. Warm night.
>How ponies figured out refrigeration without electricity stumps you good.
>They're inventive little fuckers.

>You come back to the living room with the drinks, setting them down on the coffee table, next to the couch.
"Wanna come sit down?"
>"No thanks. Wanna stay at my post."
>You resist the urge to respond with some quip.
"Alright, then."
>You pluck a cushion off the couch -- crimson, quilted, and buttoned in the middle -- and toss it gently to a spot next to Careful on the rug.
>You sit down on it cross-legged and put Careful's drink down.
>She eyes it for a second.
>"Can I have a straw?"
"...yeah."
>You get it and plop it in.
>"Thank you!"
"You're welcome."

>...
>...okay, fine.
>You can admit it to yourself now.
>She's sweet.
>...in her way.
>You smile at her.
"Cheers."
>You plink your glass gently against hers.
>She looks at you with slightly-widened eyes and an otherwise neutral expression that can only be startled confusion.
>You guess... you guess ponies don't do "cheers."
>Probably hard, with hooves.
>Like drinking without a straw.
"It means 'enjoy.'"
>Satisfied, she offers a quick smile, sits down, and takes a sip of water.
>You do the same.

>It's late enough that you can hear crickets outside now, you notice.
>Funny that they can live this far up a mountainside.
>"I guess it's okay to sit on the couch."
"Huh?"
>"The couch. View of the door from there is fine. Higher up and I could probably still jump off it real quick."
"Cool."
>You take a seat. She follows.
>She sits with her legs out, head up, booty in your direction.
>Not exactly supine, but it's more relaxed than you've seen her all evening.
"Comfortable?"
>"Yeah."
>You hear something weird in her voice, so you look over at her.
>She's looking down and her eyes are swimming.
>Oh fuck.
>What did you do now?

>>28302738
yiss

>>28302738
>>It's late enough that you can hear crickets outside now, you notice.
Fuck do I love the sound of crickets. Them and frogs, could put me to sleep.

>>28292435
and then burying their muzzles into your groin

>>28302755
Seriously. I live out in the desert and for me it's the sound of coyotes.

>>28302825
It'd be a triangle of pleasure. Brave on your cock, Vannie eating out Brave, and you munching on the bat's taco.

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>>28302829
I live in the woods on a grassy hill surrounded by swamp on three sides.

There's a lot of wildlife around, it's very cozy.

>>28302738
>eyes swimming
Awww. I need to know what's wrong.

>>28302738
Sad horsie! Snuggle her!