Princess Applejack

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Here is full archive of the stories in condensed, easy-to-read form with all chatter in-between removed.
Check out the pastebin here:
http://pastebin.com/u/PrincessApplejack

Curious what happened last time?
Check out the previous thread here:https:/desuarchive.org/mlp/thread/28017167
You are completely new and have no idea what is going on? There is a wikia with an overview of all characters, a complete timeline, previous thread recaps and explanation of the various concepts used in these stories!
Check out the wiki here:http://princess-aj.wikia.com/wiki/Princess_Applejack_Wiki

Confused about when a character first showed up or who they are? Want to know when an arc started?
Check out character notes and details here :
https://docs.google.com/spreadsheets/d/1PsMAwLcIdC3IYxezAV9Ko4neEguNvc3eQqQqiTCxdDs/edit#gid=2119378650

Check out the 'Princess Applejack: Re-Cut Edition' here: https://docs.google.com/document/d/15cv3kqExr_vOM0JkUh4dqnvVKxJ5Z-P1KHwE8Z7aG0k/edit?usp=sharing
And finally, while most of the thread is very much clop free, we have a pastebin in case you're feeling a little more naughty with your writing, find it here. http://pastebin.com/u/PrincessAJAfterDark please upload any like it to a pastebin so they can be added out of thread.
And above all else, enjoy your stay at /paj/!

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First for Pinkie

>>28127238
And sexy hooves guy weeps...

>>28127238
Don't try to think, best is pink!

>>28127291
We are NOT going into another rhymeoff! NO!

ZECORA GO TO BED

>>28127181
>>28127189
>>28127202
>>28127210
Seriously why

OOCO
>AJ
"Celestia'
~~~

>Tia? Gotta question.

"And I have more hate in my heart than can ever be be laid out. So much hate, it threatens to burn me away. Burn with me, Applejack... burn with me."

>Yer' gonna burn iffin' ya' don't tell me why ya' used mah' dang toothpaste!

"...what?'

>Mah' toothpaste, the apple cinnamon flavor one! Ya' used it! Ah' wouldn't even have minded it iffin' ya' didn't use it all then left the dang empty tube out there! That's just wrong! It's like, oh, Ah' got toothpast, Ah' ain't gotta get some more, then Ah' come in ta' get some and blam! It's gone! All gone! And now Ah' haven't brushed mah' teeth and Ah'm startin' ta' get the sour apple breath, and it's all yer' fault! Why!?

"Applejack?"

>Well, what's the reason!?

"I didn't steal your toothpaste, Shiny did. I don't like apple cinnamon, I like orange juice. It makes me feel alive."

>Oh.

"...Oh? Aren't you going to go rant at him?"

>Hm? Oh, naw, it's fine, he probably wasn't even fully awake when he did it, guy stumbles in lookin' like the dead most days. Should'a known when the mint swirl wasn't opened. Ah well, fairs fair, Ah' steal his all the time.

"...Really."

>What?'

"He gets off the hook and I get all the rants?"

>Yep.

"You're not going to say anything?"

>Well, Ah could ask you why the railroad system isn't-

"NEVERMIND!"

BACKFLIP!

>Says somethin' that the only way ta' make her leave is ta' ask her to do work.

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Pinkie prophesies!

>Shining doesn't have a headstart but he does have a head,
>Pinkies ultimate move will shock you,
>it might be the end of the world as we know it but Dash feels fine,
>Fluttershy wants to ride the tiger,
>Sweetie Belle's bubblewand is no match for a grenade launcher,
>Rarity doesn't know what time it is,
>Spike wonders if he's a straight shooter or if he leans sometimes,
>Celestia shows them what sunshine makes the ladybugs awake
>Sharing fanservice!

>>28127413
>>Sharing fanservice!

Does that story above count? It feels like cheating.

>>28127466
Eh, we'll be nice and double up to be on the safe side for guest PP dude.

>>28127352
Is... is this the resurrection of the slice-of-life trio stories? Dare I dream of them coming back?

>>28127549
Here's to hoping!

Goodnight, new thread,

>>28127549
More of those would be excellent as fuck, really.

>Twinklejinx
"Book"
'Rekulk'

>MISTAKES HAVE BEEN MADE!

'Please, new trade friend! I am assured we can make a great deal together, yes? Yes!'

>Confound you, witch, give me something to use against him!

"Fine, we're going to need an instrument."

>An instrument?

"Yeah, ever hear of music soothing the savage beast?"

>Uhm...uh...AHA!

-Come on down to Sheetsly Music Emporium, for all your music nee- -

Swipe swipe swipe swipe!

-HEY!-

>There, the instruments are in my telekinetic grasp!

"Excellent, now all I need to do is reach out with my magic and..."

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZnHmskwqCCQ

'Ooh this music is much of a hoof tapper!'

>He's not slowing down! Your plan failed!

"Not really, I just wanted this to have some mood music!"

>I HATE YOU SO MUCH!

>>28128093
Oh come on. You saw that coming, tj.

Morning Thread.

>>28128093
And Canterlot just nonchalantly watches..

>>28129384
Comparatively, that is so normal it is boring.

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>>28127352
>Tia? Gotta question.

>>28129767
Oh my gosh, the face is realized!

>>28129767
That is thread 1 got a question down to a tee. Amazing how she grew to enjoy it.

>>28129767
It's... Beautiful.,.

>>28129767
Ladies and gentlemen, "not mad, just disappointed " personified.

>>28129767
Why couldn't we protect her smile?

>>28130180
She's cuter when grumpy.

>>28130180
Well... we DID take her away from her home and that one anon never got around to making the new terrace on the castle with a small group of Apple Sapling for AJ to take care of and decompress... plus all that junk that happened with Chrysalis and her lings... and then Blueblood's robert invasion... then... well you get the idea... No times for smiles when you're fixing things. All work & political things means drifting from apple core values... like taking care of those that look up to you and you are responsible fore... like Applebloom... and Sunset... yeah, that smile was nearly DOA and we've been keeping it from flat lining ever since... with a few more ruptured blood vessels here and there.

>>28130212
Don't you use the way her cheeks puff out to make a cute little bubble face, the way her nose adorably scrunches inwards when she gets puff, and the little shimmer her eyes give off that makes even Two respect her for your own selfish means, monster! You are evil!

>>28129767
Love it!

OOCO
>AJ
“Celestia”
~~~

>Ah’m startin’ to worry about Shining.

“If this is about the braids, I swear he agreed to that.”

>Nah, just seems like he’s stumblin’ into mah’ bed more and more.

“…oh?”

>Yeah, he just shuffles in at night, lookin’ like he done crawled up out his grave, then kinda flops over on the bed and does his best not ta’ make any sudden movements. It’s creepy how considerate he is not ta’ bother me, even though Ah’m pretty sure he don’t know where he is. Ah’ used ta’ just kick him out and force him ta’ find someone else ta’ sleep with, but now, ya’ know, Ah’ kinda just can’t. Ah’ don’t know what he does ta’ me, but Ah’ just keep lettin’ him back in mah’ bed.

“Well, wouldn’t he be much happier with me?”

>Ah’ don’t know bout that, he seems ta’ look a lot better when he leaves mah’ room, than when he does yours.

“I disagree!”

>Face it, he totally looks a lot better when he comes outta mah’ room than when he comes outta yours. Just look at his dang face!

“His… face?”

>Look, Ah’ don’t know why he keeps pickin’ mah’ bed, but just let me have him, Ah’ll make sure he gets what he needs.

“…very well.”

>Ya’ sure?

“Of course, its what’s best for him, isn’t it?”

>Yep. Sure is.

“Great then.”

>Good.

“…”

>Ya’ ever think they wonder where he goes?

“If they cared, they wouldn’t keep shoving him onto the floor.”

>Or at least stop tossing him...

"...it's a little-"

>A little weird, yeah.

>>28129767
>>28130434
Pic and SOL this morning?

Today is gonna be a good day.

>>28129767
Oh shit, I legit feel like my mom is staring at me.

>Changeling
“Changelings”
~~~~

>Alright, Forty Two wants us to start filling up these harnesses to be ready to ship, and she wants it done yesterday!

“OH FUCK! YESTERDAY!?”

“Oh shit oh shit oh shit, how did we forget!?”

“It only happened today, how could we have forgotten!?”

“Damn, she probably mentioned it a dozen times before it happened and we just zoned out! Again!”

“Why must we be so easily distracted!?”

“Wow, that surface is really shiny-“

“Not a good fucking time, 471!”

“Look, let’s just all calm down, she’s not here, she doesn’t know we fucked up, and she can’t punch us until she does!”

“I’ve got it! I’ll just fill one up, and then say all these assholes fucked up and forgot! Nobody will ever believe those liars!”

“We can hear you, dumbass!”

“But can anyone believe you!? I THINK NOT! For we changelings are natural liars!”

“Where is your proof?... Wait.”

“Hey, 87, that sounds like a good idea? I guess we’ll have to think of excuses, like we got caught up in FACEPUNCH!”

POW!

“ACK! BETRAYAL! INEVITABLE BETRAYAL FOR MY LIES!”

“Gimme!”

“No, give me!”

“I want it!”

“I’m not getting punched, I’ll punch you all for it!”

“RARRRRGARBLE!”

>…So that’s why majesty said not to use figure of speech…

>>28130283
Stop making me hng, damn it!

OOCO
>Celestia
"AJ"
'SA'
~~~~

>Did you order the forks?

"That was yer' job."

>No, my job was to order the cake.

"First off, lying ta the element of honesty is pretty dumb. Second, lying about something like that is somehow even dumber, cause it implies Ah' would let you within one hundred steps of the order form, and we both know that restraining order is valid, the judge ruled it and everything."

>I still say you bribed him.

"Sure did. Promised Ah'd keep you from the cake, and low and behold. Element o' honesty."

'Yeah, about that. What does that mean? Does that mean you are literally the most honest pony ever? That you can somehow channel honesty? Can you make others be honest? What did it mean?'

"It means stop thinking about it so hard."

'What a copout! This is one of the most defining moments of your whole life, and we are just suppose to not question it, because what, we are thinking too hard? What role model encourages others not to think hard about the universe?'

>....

"..."

'... And I ordered the forks, I knew she'd forget.'

"Great work!"

>I knew we could count on you!

"Yer the best Bubblehorse!"

'... So are just going to brush past-'

"Best Bubblehorse title is dependent on you accepting our praise."

>If you're so cruel to deny us having fun with you, then you're not best anything anymore. You're mean horse.

"Crushing' out souls."

'......best Bubblehorse?'

>The best!

"And ya get hugs! Hugs for best Bubblehorse that don't ask more questions!"

>Hugs!

'Just take the win, Shiny... You wouldn't have liked the answer anyway, probably.'

>"Hugs!"

>>28131051
The answer being she got twilight to drop of a cliff side because she knew Dash and Shy were right there to catch her. No, I don't think you would shiny.

>>28131093
And on top of that , she wasn't eve totally honest, she didn't tell Twi anyone was down there to catch her, just that she should trust her.

He really would not.

>Rarity
“Moondancer”
~~~

“Do you hear explosions?”

>Darling, when do things not explode around here?

“Are… are you asking me? Are you seriously asking me that? Lots of things. Lots of things do not explode around here, this is not a common occurrence.”

>Clearly, someone is a shut in.

“Yes, I am, I admit that, that is a clearly known fact. Other clearly known fact? That the world doesn’t freaking explode all the time!”

>It absolutely does.

“Oh yeah? How frequent, give me the numbers!”

>That’s a little hard to explain.

“Because you don’t have them?”

>No, because things happen and don’t happen so rapidly I’m not sure what day it is anymore…

“…”

>…I might have a problem.

“…”

>…You have so many bugs in your hair-

“JUST WORK, MARE! THEN LEAVE!”

>>28129767
>AJ's face when she finds out theirs a club that worships her booty

Good friends

On this celebrated day, it is time to write Shining/Spike stories, for they will be a new Best Pair

>Pommel
“LD”
~~~

>FAUST DAMN IT, DAW!

“Is this treason? I feel like this is treason.”

>NOT THE TIME!

“If you’ve got a better time to point out your shmoopy is currently engaging in a fight with the princess, I would love to hear it.”

>ANY OTHER… shmoopy?

“I’m a romantic.”

>I don’t… what?

“Honeyboobles is fighting?”

>OH SHIT RIGHT I- no, wait. Honeyboobles? What?

“I’m sticking to it.”

>…You’re messing with me, aren’t you?

“I might be arresting you later, I figure this is a good time to get some good laughs in before that happens.”

>…WHAT!?

“Working with treasonous criminals and all.”

>She’s not treasonous! She’s trying to help, obviously!

“Well, the princess disagrees.”

>You don’t know that! She might be after Diamond Tiara!

“The one Daw is working with?”

>Ye-… no!

“She’s clearly-“

>I know she’s working with her that’s not what I meant!

“Alright, I’ll be fair. Technically, I have nothing to link you to this crime. Until you actually go at the princess, it’s just her being her.”

>…

“…”

>…You realize that the princess would never actually do anything remotely like that, and if she even thought of it Celestia would smack the stupid out of her, right?

“Yep.”

>Still gonna stick by it?

“Legally have to.”

>…

“….”

>…This is because I like Rainbow Dash better, isn’t it?

“Well it is now.”

>>28131571
Did i miss something?

>>28129767
INTO THE WIKI IT GOES!

>>28131623
HAH, eat shit Daw-Anon.

DT's getting off scott-free and your waifu's ass is going to jail

>Nightguard soldier.
“NGS2”
~~~~

>…zzzzz..

“…zzzzz…”

>…zzzz….

“…zzzz…”

BOOM!

>SHUT THE FUCK UP WE’RE TRYING TO SLEEP!

“Damn dayturnals!”

>Not a fucking word.

“Shuh up, I’m slee… sleeeeeppyy… zzzz…”

>…zz….

>>28131722
>DT's getting off scott-free and your waifu's ass is going to jail

...the fuck does that work...

>>28131655
I thought it was the new episode preview, but nope. That's just Celly getting flooded with Paperwork.

So, it's probably porn.

IT"S ALWAYS PORN.

>>28131966
>IT"S ALWAYS PORN.
/mlp/ in a nutshell.

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>>28131966
OF COURSHE

>Cantie
“Cantie”
~~~

>I tell you, these orb things are amazing! I got to recreate my entire wedding, all the wonderful moments from walking down the isle to our kiss to seal the deal, and then I even got to see our wedding night, it was beautiful, I got to share it with so many who missed it, and show that bitch what she’s missing! YOU SHOULDN’T HAVE LEFT ME, LINKIE!

“…”

>I’m sorry, did I ramble again?

“There’s a giant fucking robot fight going on over there.”

>Oh, yeah. Forgot about that… neat.

“Neat.”

>Nnnneeat.

“…”

>…

“…”

>…So about that wedding night, want to see some more clips-

“The fuck is wrong with everyone!?”

OOCO
>AJ
"Celestia"
'SA'
~~~

'I'm telling you, there's a thing that can vomit up it's own intestines. Intentionally! As a defense mechanism!'

>Wouldn't that just make it a whole lot easier for whatever's eatin' it? Ain't nothin' but meat then.

"Now Applejack, reconsider. If you were walking up to something to eat it, anything, and then it literally vomited up it's own insides, would you really think "Oh yes, this is completely fine to eat!"?"

>Wouldn't know, apples vomitin' up their insides just makes them easier.

'Hypothetical for meat, though.'

>Ah'll leave the hypothetical meat-eatin' ta' Celly there, thankyee very much.

"What? Why do you think I-... Oh ha ha. Please, like you've never wondered what it would be like."

>Deny every bit of it.

"Mmmhm. Never been a single day where you've wondered what it would feel like at all, I'm sure."

>Nope.

"Not a single lonely night where your mind drifted?"

>Nuh huh.

"And you're certainly not thinking of it right now."

>....nope.

"Ha ha!"

>Shut up!

'I feel like I lost the conversation at some point.'

>Don't worry, ya'll will find out when she finally breaks.

"It could happen, I'm ashamed to admit."

'So are we actually talking about-'

>We're talkin' about whateeever you think we are, loverboy.

'...'

>...

"..."

'...Crap.'

>Told ya' his mind would go to that.

"Shiny! So impure!"

'ENTRAPMENT!'

>Ain't entrapment iffin' it's a bet. Speakin' of, pay up.

"So! Impure!"

'...I'm still-"

>We know.

>>28131914
It doesn't! Hahahahaha!

>>28132359
M-m-m-m-m-muh rocket waifu loli.....

>>28132322
Chill.
As.
Fuck.

Pretty soon it's gonna be best trio.

LAST THREAD RECAP, ROYAL SISTER RUMBLE EDITION!
>Celestia wonders what happened, but when Shining finds her she isn't very bothered. She deduced it wasn't an invasion due to nobody being hurt, so after playing around the two decide to head out at a leisurely pace.
>The guards know better than to fight the robot.
>Twinklejinx and the book manage to avoid detection by 32, for a little bit. But when Actarius holds a changeling learning class, where four other changelings sit in a circle and he teaches them to read, with 32 helping after some reluctant acceptance by the lings, TJ is forced to hide in 32's closet.
>There, he comes across a 'disguise', which consists of a big wide brimmed purple hat, rainboots, a bunch of scarves, and ski goggles, all the stuff that was left over from when the Embassy was a clothing shop that 32 couldn't get rid of.
>One of the lings, 47, finds him, but when said ling asks why 32 has a skeleton in his closet, he's blown off.
>Afterwords, TJ is forced out and into the class in a case of mistaken identity. After the real 47 comes back, he's forced to jump out the window in an attempt to flee. He gets away, leaving an oddly nonchalant Actarius and JJ, and a very chalant and freaked out 32 behind.
>Outside, he discovers how things have changed, and promptly freaks out before thinking of a way to use it for world domination. In one such idea, he realized he needed a different name than Twinklejinx, and he gets offered suggestions from none other than Rekulk, the morlock! After which he promptly flees... again.
>FS and Dash fail to make it home due to something standing in their way. That something? Fluttershy's brother Zephyr.
>It's not a happy reunion.
>77 encourages Harry to vote.
>Canties wonder when the EG are going to start.
>Two guards try to find out who's PT could kick the other PT's ass. The answer? Taser. Very polite tasers.
>Berry is going to vote for AJ, don't ask why.
1/4moreIsaymore!

>>28132497
>Aloe and Lotus are going to vote differently because they want others to be able to tell who's who.
>Also, maybe themselves.
>CC and Flitter share a same problem, and also the problem of getting into overblown fights.
>Mayor Mare calls 29 into his office, reminds him of that time she made a deal with Chrysalis to save him from getting his head blown off, and then reveals... something.
>OOCO Two is very good at diplomatic meals.
>OOCO DT has a woodchuck, and after much debating and betting with a host of others, finds that a woodchuck can chuck 499 wood, Why? Because it's Pinkie's woodchuck. This all makes sense.
>Silver Spoon is enjoying Spoiled Rich and PD losing their minds.
>AJ finds she likes her new armor, which augments all her abilities. DT dislikes it, since it was supposed to be for her.
>It makes her stronger, faster and all around more powerful, with two little catches. One, it's near impossible to control, resulting in her hitting the wall over and over, and Two, It was designed for DT, including when she would grow up, which means it's made to go as big as she can possibly go. Which is why it's a little saddening to DT when AJ says it's really tight in the rear.
>Even without the armor, which AJ refuses to return, DT still charges the mech with TBDRLIATU.
>AJ is having none of that, catching her in mid air and carrying her off away from the battle. There, after trying to reach her by telling her of how dangerous it all is, and getting nothing but threatened for her trouble, AJ has had enough, and makes a choice.
>The choice to rip off it's jumpjets, and then hurl TBDRLIATU over the distance, respectively.
>This utterly breaks DT, who is now convinced she's letting her mother down, and despite how much it hurt to do, AJ doesn't apologize for it as she walks away.
2/4youdirtywhore

>>28132322
That went so smoothly. These three have a certain magic about 'em. Just... Yes.

>>28132507
>Lightning Dust finally meets the battle, and is confused nothing is happening. Likewise, Pommel who is also there does not seem to have any idea, and is unwilling to attack the docile mech. So they sit around and chat.
>Filthy Rich reveals his real reason for the mayoral race, bringing his family back together!
>Daw finds DT in a despondent state after watching the rocket launcher get tossed, and when she hears DT apologize to her mother she decides she's had enough of that, and goes down and tells DT to get on her back. After a pep talk, she agrees.
>On the flight, Daw tells DT it's okay if she wants to cry, no matter how much she denies it and insists only children cry. Daw points out that her own father figure, one of the strongest shes' known, cried too, for the same reason she did when he died. Afterwards, DT admits she's afraid of letting her mother down, who was the only one who actually let her do all this stuff without referring to her as a kid.
>Daw understands, and when TBDRLIATU flies back into her hooves, after firing off in a way even Daw can't figure out, they turn around and get right back towards the battle.
>Gambling and Quicksilver, who TBDRLIATU had been watching this whole time after he landed in front of them, get blasted.
>Scootaloo and a changeling have a chat.
>10 is so excited she gets to cover the mayoral race, because nothing is happening in Canterlot... right?
>Pinkie, while running around and slapping ponies to find where Cadence is, makes a terrible mistake, and slaps Jokey Chan.
>She's doomed.
>Spitfire looks at the form for the Wonderbolt Captain contest for a while, declaring she doesn't need it, but when she leaves it's untouched.
>Luna's teaching technique needs work, but don't tell her that.
>A Peacetrotter wishes for a perp to reconsider the cookies. He does not.
>When a Cantie says aloud he 'wants' a princess like AJ, Spike does not take kindly to it.
3/4Blor.

>>28132514
>He takes even less kindly to it that said cantie doesn't recognize him, but knows Sweetie Belle right away.
>Though Spike wants to help AJ, when SB runs off talking about living dolls and he hears Babs scream, he decides it's worth looking into.
>AJ tackles Applebloom, and initially freaks out that she hurt her, not so much when the battle resumes.
>Shiny and Celly are bantering when they almost make it to the fight, with Celly declaring she will drop him in a heartbeat if he keeps sassing her.
>That becomes way less funny when he falls through Canterlot, through a hole in the floor AJ made, and she freaks out before catching him just in time.
>After that, she.. needs a minute.
>Cadence worries about it too.
>Rarity, out of options, says that if Moondancer lets her do a makeover, she'll leave. Reluctantly, she agrees.
>42 is noticing something odd in the Empire...
>Fuzzy and the Buzz keep you updated.
>The Changelings begin to wonder if they can just leave.
>Velvet accidentally makes Two cry.
>The battle between AJ and AB heats up, with AB pulling out all the stops and being completely invulnerable, and AJ trying to figure out how to use her armor. Just when AB starts to get the advantage, she's suddenly blasted by a giant missile, and nearly knocked down. Seeing DT riding on Daw and getting back into the fray, AJ is ticked.
>Worried, Daw admits that she hopes DT has a plan, and said filly does. That is, just stay ahead of her, since she needs to charge every jump. Then she'll blow her up. It's not a complicated plan.
>But more importantly, this is bad. Why? Because it has made AB a very, very, very unhappy filly. Seeing AJ charge off again, she feels like she's being ignored, again. That's not going to stand.
>Enrages, she hits the biggest, most dangerous looking button she can find, and lets it all out.
>~Berserk mode activated~

As always, if I missed anything/something isn't clear, clear it up for me.

In a maid outfit, preferably.

>>28132443
The "Seriously needs a good hard dicking" Trio

I like it

>>28132583
Well, I mean, they're already hanging out...

Could probably all just sneak off and solve that problem themselves, just the three of them, I reckon.

>>28132650
>Nuclear Fusion Vagina
>Ubermarensch Thighs and Buttocks of Crushing
>Feather Trigger End-of-The-World Penis

I doubt it'd be pretty

And that's not going into oral

Earthponies give the best blowjobs -Anon 2012

>>28132682
>>Nuclear Fusion Vagina
>Bubbleshield while AJ gives him some backup power.
>>Ubermarensch Thighs and Buttocks of Crushing
>NO PAIN NO GAIN SOLDIER!
>>Feather Trigger End-of-The-World Penis
>Only if it's a changeling.

GET IN THE DAMN GAME ANON

>>28132138
>They no longer care.
>They just don't give a fuck.

We broke them.

>>28132703
>>>Feather Trigger End-of-The-World Penis
>>Only if it's a changeling.
Wait really?

How?

When?

Why?

Is this Twilight's findings?

>>28133037
No, it's the running gag...

Shiny sleeping with a changeling=END OF THE WORLD!

File: Redheart Diagnoses Anon's Problem.png (518KB, 848x1000px) Image search: [Google]

518KB, 848x1000px

>>28131722

>>28133078
Welp, 18 just hung herself

Chrysalis is bludgeoning herself with a coffee machine

File: Ya dun fucked up.jpg (17KB, 200x162px) Image search: [Google]

17KB, 200x162px

>>28133128
>Chrysalis is bludgeoning herself with a coffee machine

Anon, no.

>>28133128
It's a NC running gag.

So, yeah, they did that, probably a lot. Died from it too.

>>28129767 This calls for grumpy Aj antics!
OOCO
>SA
"Celly"
'AJ'
~~~

'How could ya' forget the dang sleeping bags!?'

>Hey, I'm an army stallion, we didn't get sleeping bags. I'll have you know we camped out under the stars, completely exposed to the elements, uncovered and getting bitten by all sorts of bugs while dirt and leaves stuck us in the back, and that's if we were lucky! The unlucky guys got the rocks.

"Uh huh, and you had to do it uphill, both coming and going."

>Only on roulette mountain, which in hindsight was all a matter of timing and we chose poorly.

'Yer' tellin' me you never even got a dang tent?

>Nope! We got rained on, snowed on, and I don't even want to tell you about the wind! Even the morning dew can ruin you by lowering your body temperature.

'Huh... that's-'

>Moronic, I know. in hindsight, it was a completely stupid thing to do which majorly affected our armies ability to function, reducing our effectiveness causing a lot of us to get sick and put a burden on our medical staff before a single fight, and completely ruined our ability to think straight or even keep from getting diseases from insects, and we probably should have just slept on a cot or something.

'...'

"Wow, how stupid! Who authorized that-"

'...'

"...I may have forgotten to fill out a paper or two."

'DANG IT CELESTIA! What are we going to do now!?'

"Huddle for body heat?"

>You know, someone brought that up with the army, nobody actually wanted to for some reason.

'...Ah' want Shining between me and you.'

"Awww, you want to cuddle Shiny?"

'No, Ah' want him ta' be the one ya' kick in the middle of the night, ya' gaddang giant twitchhorse.'

"I do not kick, Shiny tell her!"

>...

"Shiny?"

>Uh... my doctor actually says not to take anymore blows to the liver-

"I DO NOT!"

>At least I brought the mashmallows!

"How? Ah' don't see a backpack."

>...I brought the mashmallows, but may have forgotten the backpack they're in.

'...'

>I'm sorry.

>>28133558
Holy shit, yes.

>>28132703
>>Feather Trigge

Did we write in Shiny's a ten second stallion or something?

>>28132889
The only Canties left are hardcore motherfuckers.

>>28133750
No, He fucks Cadence for an entire train ride. It is a joke based on how mind controlled shiny was shit in bed with Chrysalis.

>>28133905
Literally, the whole ride.

They just finished when he got home.

>>28133558
I love it when artwork inspires stories.

i finished reading the recut version of princess applejack, which thread do i start to read to continue the story?

>>28134310
Thread 2, check out the pastebin for a chatter-removed version, it's not in the same format as the recut version(that's why it's recut), but it's sill readable.

>>28134310
Thread 2.

>AJ
"AB"
'DT'
(Daw)
~??~
~~~

The speed at which everything broke down was nothing short of stunning.

The frantic collision of every possible angle coming together like a dozen of the worlds speediest freight trains coming together in a symphony that sang of utter destruction and chaos that was every bit as stunning to behold as it was chilling to witness. In the span of a few short seconds, the whole world shifted on a dime, and no determination, no force of will, could ever hope to bring it back

It all started, as most life altering changes do, with a bang.

A single burst of sound originating from the machine down below that had dolled them out so freely, a pop that took the attention of scheming filly, raging princess, and focused pegasi away from their squabbles and thought just long enough to remind the three there were consequences for looking away, even for a moment. That one instance, short as it was, was too long to take back, or undo.

One instance, where the thing that should have been to heavy to move properly, the thing that should have been too weighty to do anything more than fall with a thunderclap should it hop an inch, began to float up.

>...Twi might'a overdid it.

'WHAT THE FUCK!?'

The gaping pegasus beneath her shared the sentiment, even if her hissing breath couldn't quite find the words to put to it in order to vocalize the heart rending terror she felt at that moment. Even for one who had seen a literal island become alive and destroy with reckless gusto, watching that thing rise up seemed well beyond the realm of sanity, and straight into the absurd.

"CAN'T IGNORE ME NOW, CAN YA'!?"

The whole thing heaved forwards, doing little more than tilting and letting gravity roll her in the direction rather than aiming it with anything even approaching precision. It was a lumbering brick, a floating wrecking ball and nothing more. All of the fanciest technology that Equestria's finest could bring, reduced to one thing.

Hitting, and hard.

1/9

>>28134573

The lumbering behemoth of metal charged with all it's massive body could manage, and those in it's way were reduced to anything else in the path of a wrecking ball.

Getting out of the way, or getting wrecked.

'MOVE!"

The ex-pirate needed no more motivation, she hadn't even needed that. All she knew was that flying, and flying very fast, was exactly what she needed to do at that moment. So she flew, as fast as her wings could carry her, away from the shadow looming over her and to the place she could only jokingly call 'safe'.

>STOP THIS RIGHT NOW!

Right on their tails and fleeing just as fast as them, no matter how in change and in control she attempted to seem, was the princess who struggled to make her armor listen to her just long enough to get her free from the looming end of the roaring machine. It obeyed, by accident or design, and rocketed her clear from the metal mass just before it collided with the wall she had been leaning on, reducing it to nothing but rubble that didn't so much as scratch the shining paintjob on the front.

Her escape came at a cost.

>Ow.

One she was willing to pay, no matter how much she wished she had gone anywhere except on the corners of one of the doorways, ensuring her entire stop only came after carving clear a long rent in long, long wall.

'This thing can fly!? This is more bullshit than when Chitania did it! How!?'

"It can do way more than that..."

A malicious, evil hoof slammed down on the weapons systems, and the whole of the tank's upper half snapped around at an unnatural angle. What had before been a trickle, a calculated barrage of missiles cut loose. The Berserk mode had only one thing on its artificial mind.

Missiles, all the missiles.

>...She is so grounded.

2/9

>>28134578

So entrenched in the wall and unable to move as she was, the low mumble of the princess was as drowned out as she herself became when a great many of them headed towards her, a wall of fire she had not a single hope of dodging, and only a single hope that the ineffectiveness and non-lethal nature would hold true for these as well as it had before.

She need not find out.

'SCATTERBOMBS!'

For the only filly in the world that loved explosions more was ready and waiting, and she only needed one missile to match them all.

One missile that became many, admittedly, but one missile all the same.

"NO YOU DID NOT!"

The yellow filly's fury matched the swirling lights all around her, the red in her eyes brighter than any of those bulbs could bring. Her hooves slammed onto every button she could reach, cracking the seemingly unbreakable things with the force that only an anger like hers could bring.

"YA'LL AIN'T GONNA STOP ME THIS TIME YA' STUPID BULLY!"

Revenge could do that to a filly.

(HOLY SHIT!)

The pegasi's words seemed inadequate as three different, uniquely colored lasers carved through the world, their burning rays leaving searing scorch marks behind every which way.

'Stay steady! I need a clear shot!'

She banked suddenly, sending a retaliatory strike wide. A necessary evil, considering she had been mere inches from getting tagged by the bright white ray.

(Oh sure, getting right on that missy, would you like a fuckin' spot of tea while I'm at it!?)

'Just focus!'

(On what!?)

'HER!'

The filly suddenly twisted, her hoof pulling the trigger before her vision had even ceased to be an incomprehensible blur. Despite her speed, her shot rang true.

Right into the chest of the mare who had been diving right at them.

(Was she just jumping at US!? The fuck is wrong with her!?)

'Do you have a week for me to tell you-LEFT!'

She dodged without question, just in time to dance between two rocket, and the white hot energy that mingled with them.

3/9

>>28134587

>Damn it, will ya'll run already!? Daw, get her outta here!

Though it was surprising to the pirate to hear the princess's voice cry out, when by all rights she should have been down for the count, the filly on her back held no such illusion. She knew what that armor was capable of, and knew full well even a shot like that couldn't manage it.

(No can do, princess! We got us a robot to blow up!)

>That's an order, ya' hear me! Ah'm orderin' you to leave!

The pegasi was almost taunting as she dodged and weaved, getting closer and closer to the hovering monster of metal to grant her passenger a clearer shot.

(You're thinkin' of my better half. I don't work for you, mate!)

She nearly bit off her tongue in her anger, already charging up another leap in towards the pair.

>Ah'm still a dang- LOOK OUT!

Her legs moved faster than her mind when she saw a hidden latch pop open just as the filly reached prime barrage range, for both herself and very much for the thing she fought. So fast was her impromptu flight, she barely even registered the launch of something very big, and very long before it fired right for the pink filly's face.

It found nothing but metal covered orange back, and whatever it had been meant to do was reduced to nothing but a shove as it knocked into her like a bowling ball. Straight back, and into the shocked pony it had hungered for a mere second ago.

Faster than Daw could blink, she realized they had been fired upon, something had flashed before her eyes, and now her back felt a whole lot lighter. She would have wondered about that more, had every single weapon not trained itself right on her, and she now found herself the focus of the filly's rage.

(...this escalated quickly.)

The filly, currently in a freefall after being princess-bludgeoned off her steed's back, disagreed. Everything was deescalating far too quickly for her tastes, mostly herself, and in the direction of the ground.

>DIAMOND TIARA!

4/9

>>28134594

The moment she had her bearings, far too late in her mind, she dove straight down with all the speed she could muster, lips flapping back in the wind as she strove to close the gap between herself and the falling filly before the final splat could ring out.

>I'LL GET YOU! HOLD ON AH'VE GOT YOU, JUST-

The splat never came. Instead, a loud twang and a clack took it's place.

The princess was given only a second's glance at the silver cable that sprang out from the rocket launcher before the pink blur whizzed past her, her momentum reducing and converting into a long swing, before the fate she had feared for the filly became all too real for her.

With a solid and pathetic whump, she hit the ground, hooves still outward in fear to catch the one quickly swinging around before coming to a much softer skid of a stop.

'Hrmph. As if I need you to-CUT IT OUT!'

Her reactions were just fast enough, even if it was cut so close she could feel her own missile's air rolling on her face as it shoved the princess mid dive, a mere fraction of an inch from her being close enough to once more pluck the rocket launcher from her hooves.

The filly's face became a twisted, red nightmare, with a burning gaze that never left the mare as she rolled away before coming to a stop on her side.

'Stop that, now! When are you going to get it through your thick head!? How many times to I have to blast it into you! You're not getting rid of me, and you're never hurting TBDRLIATU again!'

The princess didn't move, remaining to lie still on the ground with her back to the screeching, high pitched bundle of anger.

'WELL!? WHAT'S IT GOING TO TAKE!?'

Not a response came. Neither it or a single movement.

'ANSWER ME, APPLEJACK!"

Nothing, but stillness and quiet amidst the roar of battle and destruction.

'...A-Applejack?'

>Why won't you let me fix mah' mistake?

5/9

>>28134604

The filly would never admit she felt her heart jump, turning back on after feeling dormant for far too long. She would never admit it, to herself or others, that she felt a cool rush along her chest when she heard that voice.

>Why don't you see Ah' just want to get you away before you get hurt?

Shaking, wobbling hooves helped raise the princess, and not a one of them was caused by any sort of injuries.

'...you haven't learned anything.'

If the heat on the filly's face go by, those inures may come, in time.

>What am Ah' gonna have to do?

The sudden, desperate rasp was all that kept her trigger from pulling.

>Just... just tell me what Ah' have ta' say to make you go home. Tell me what you wanna hear so that you'll leave. Ah'll say it, Ah'll...

She shuddered, putting on the hat that had fallen from her head, and pulling it down over her eyes, so that the filly couldn't see.

>Want me to say that Ah'm just jealous yer' so great, and Ah' don't want you taking all the glory? Fine. Ah'll say it, to you, to them, to everyone. Ah'll do a damn press release and call the whole of Equestria, swear on it. Ah'll tell them all Ah'm too scared you're gonna surpass me, that you'll make me look bad. Ah'll tell them you did all the hard work. You win, you'll look great, everyone will know this was all you, and yer' the best. You win, and they'll all know it, just please... go home. Go home before somethin' happens, and Ah' can't fix this ever again.

She held there, eyes pointed squarely to the ground, and she waited, and she prayed.

'...No.'

She felt it right in her chest when it failed.

>Why won't you just let me protect you-

'NO!'

6/9

>>28134616

The soft voice was easily drowned out, any retort long gone under the realization it would bear no fruit.

'No! Just... stop! Just stop! You don't get to just... try to turn it off, okay! You don't get to tell me to go home after all I've been through, all I went through! You don't get to go, 'well, that's your lot, you don't get to be in it anymore!' You don't get to do that!'

>Why not!?

Finally, she looked up, glistening eyes meeting the glare given, and returning it in kind.

>Why won't you let me fix it!? Ah' messed up, Ah' know Ah' did now! You never should've gone this far! You never should've become... this! You should've just stayed the little firecracker who annoyed mah' little sister all the time, not... this! Ah' made this when Ah' let you in, this is mah' fault! Ah' admit it! It's all true! Blame me, yer' right! Hate me, ya' got the right to do it! Do whatever you have to do, just let me fix it!

'You had your chance!'

Of ever single projectile and explosive shot at her today, that was the one that managed to hit true.

'You had your chance... and you tried to make me quit again.'

She growled, her grip on TBDRLITU suddenly slipping ever so slightly as she stared down the one so much bigger, so much more powerful than her. One she held no fear for.

Only hate.

'You had your chance to let me back in after Cordyceps, or when we save that changeling, but no. You said no, again, even after I showed you I can handle myself! Even after I showed you how good I was! You could have let me rejoin then!'

>Ah' was tryin' to keep you safe-

'Why didn't you just believe in me again!?'

Something about the words, the desperation and need that was so much stronger than the ego and the pride, the way she looked at her, all of it made her stop, and feel so empty inside her metal shell.

7/9

>>28134629

'You... you believed in me, back when this all started, you knew I could do it, didn't you? You said you did! You knew I could handle it, and I did! I managed, no matter what happened, and then you just... abandoned me.'

She had nothing to say, what could she in the face of the eyes of the filly, who would not let a single drop fall no matter how much it seemed she wished to.

'You knew I could do it, then you just... ignored me.'

She turned her back on the princess, never once looking to the metallic, outstretched hoof that reached for her.

'I thought you understood what I could do, what nobody else did... but I was wrong.'

Her nose jutted to the air, hauty and prim, all of the shakes long gone.

'And I don't need you anymore. I've found friends, a whole bunch of them, and all of them know what I can do. Mommy's even going to set me up to prove it against even bigger foes, you'll see! They all want me to be better. Not like you, who wants me to just... go home. I thought you understood, I thought you believed in me, I was wrong.

Her weapon pointed straight, aimed right at the mech currently harassing her previous ride.

'So... so I'm going to go out there, and I'm going to prove all of them right, and you wrong. I'll prove it, and leave you here in the dirt... where you belong.'

Her hoof hovered on the grappling trigger, and she tensed as she prepared to fly.

>...Ah'm so sorry.

It stilled, the ice running through her veins enough to freeze her in place.

>Ah'm so, so sorry... Ah' was wrong. Just tell me... what do Ah' have to do to make it up to you? What can Ah' do to make it right? Ah' don't want... Ah' don't want to lose someone else Ah' care about, because Ah' was a thickheaded idiot. Ah've already lost someone like that, and Ah' don't know if Ah'll get them back. I don't want to let it happen again. How can Ah' fix this? Just tell me, what can Ah' do? Ah'll do it... just tell me.

'...Stay out of my way.'

8/9

>>28134641

The grappling hook launched, went taut, and pulled her away, all before another word could be spoke.

All before Applejack could see her face.

>...Ah'm sorry.

But no matter how fast she was pulled away, it wasn't fast enough for Applejack to miss what she had left behind.

>But Ah' can't do that.

She had a let someone down today. She had let someone down yesterday. She had let so many down so many times, she couldn't keep track of it all. Her stubbornness, her pride, and her need to be right had caused it, she knew. She had failed before.

>Because... Ah' gotta make it right.

She would not fail this time, for either of the them.

>Ah' can fix this.

>>28134649
>>Ah' can fix this.

You can do it, AJ!

Or make it so much worse, it's 50/50 with you!

>>28134696
She's actually got a great track record, just ponies who look up to her, well...

>>28134696
She doesn't have to make it worse, she is close though and as much as it is going to anger a few people, DT and AB going over AJ is probably the better move here. She hasn't even lost yet and she is learning, she just can't accept it yet.
>>28134812
part of the job when you have to be everyone else's hero, you lose sight of those that who already looked up to you.

>>28134649
Goddamn, AJ is getting beat to hell here, but I don't want it to stop.

>>28134838
>DT and AB going over AJ is probably the better move here.

You mean getting over her?

Also, kinda funny how they have that bonding experience now.

>>28134649
I honestly was hoping for IWGDWTYWU but this is working out better than I expected.

>>28134878
>r IWGDWTYWU

...alright, I'll bite, the fuck does that mean?

>>28135014
DT's last resort when TBDRLIATU is out of her hands. She says the acronym and TBDRLITATU detonates everything it has left at once. Spelled out it means
>If We're Going Down We're Taking You With US.

>>28135044
Ohhhh yeahhh, thats right. She used it on the one time she actually managed to hurt Chitty.

I gotcha now.

>>28134649
I BELIEVE IN APPLEJACK

>>28134649
>DT and AJ still protect each other when shit goes down

Still hope in ponies.

>>28134878
>honestly was hoping for IWGDWTYWU

You were hoping DT would blow her up?

That shit almost wrecked Chitania at her peak, AJ would have a hole blown in her.

>>28135386
>You were hoping DT would blow her up?

Well...Yeah. I mean AJ would have at most only been knocked out because MC plot armor is the strongest there is. And Alicorn Immortality is broken on top of that. So it would have been cathartic but about as ineffectual as Celestia drowning herself.

>>28135432
I agree with your first sentiment that this is better, her just trying to talk to DT and offering an olive branch works better.

Admittedly, I like this better because this leaves room for some reconciliation, and it's not just her ineffectually charging before losing, like with Sunset was, but there you go.

>>28134649
>Pommel
"LD"

>Oh no! Captain, you got to give Daw some support! Captain...captain?

"Alright, where'd that gambler changeling get off to, I got fifty bits on pirate lady biting the dust!"

>...pleasecomebackDash.

>>28135651
Because Dash would save Daw who was in a sense attacking AJ? I get the point we are driving with these two (Dash Great, Dust Bad) but Pommel would run to help Daw, not make snarky commentary, if he thought she needed it.

>>28135724
I forgot the NC for that

>>28135724
>Because Dash would save Daw who was in a sense attacking AJ?

It's pretty much a free for all at this point, no telling who she would attack.

Goodnight, thread.

>>28134641
>'And I don't need you anymore. I've found friends, a whole bunch of them, and all of them know what I can do. Mommy's even going to set me up to prove it against even bigger foes, you'll see! They all want me to be better. Not like you, who wants me to just... go home. I thought you understood, I thought you believed in me, I was wrong.

Oh hey I didn't know Brad Bird read /pa/

>>28136419
Night amin

>>28134649
>Sunset
>Applebloom
>Diamond Tiara

I bet the next pony whose life you can ruin is just waiting around the corner, Applejack!

But, seriously, she ought talk to Celestia about this. All this 'It's all your fault' talk is starting to get applicable to her too.

>>28137491
>spoiler
I feel it's sort of fitting that that seems to be happening, because then the true learning can begin.

>>28137460
Morning anon

>>28137551
And hopefully, this will lead to some more understanding with Celly.

They need a good talk

>>28138276
And AJ still owes her a letter that doesn't read 'Ah was right'

>OOCO
>Celestia
“AJ”
‘SA’
~???~
~~~

>…Well one of us clearly has to go clean it.

“Ah’ ain’t cleanin’ nothing but that useless hunk o’ gray matter from between yer’ ears that ya’ clearly ain’ usin’ anyway! Shining, you do it, yer’ supposed ta’ serve the government.”

‘She says to the foreign royal who hasn’t served this government in years.’

“Oh sure, now ya’ wanna pretend like yer’ all important.”

‘Hurtful.’

>Applejack, it’s your bathroom, you’re responsible for your own toilet, what would your granny say if she knew you were skirting your duties?

“That she ain’t as dumb either, and she can see yer’ dang hair on mah’ brush! It’s fricken’ movin, Celly!”

>Do you think I did this? I deny all of it, I clearly had nothing to do with it.

“LOOK AT IT! You tell me that me or Shining have the dang room inside us to do that, period! Ah’m prett sure unless we walked around lookin’ like balloons, weren’t one of us!”

‘Wow, mental image I did not need.’

>Did you just call me fat!?

“Ah’ ain’t callin’ you fer’ dinner! Cause what comes after obviously ain’t pretty!”

>Oh, you did not little mare!

“Dang right Ah’m little, too little to let that happen! It ain’t possible that came outta me!”

‘Okay, I think we all need to calm down, and maybe I get the bubble in between-‘

>You want to call me fat? I’ll show you how fat I am when I sit on you!

“Not iffin’ Ah’ sit on you first!”

‘The bubbles, they do nothing! My life has been wasted!’

>”I’M GONNA-“

POP!

~Pardon me, ladies? Is this open?... Oh, you haven’t cleaned it yet. Well do hurry up, I can’t ruin it until you fix it!~

SNAP!
POP!

>…

“…”

‘…Wow, Discord really needs more fiber in his diet.’

>…Apology?

“Ah’ll accept it.”

>Fine… onetwothree-

>”’NOT IT!””

>Shoot! Who’s going to clean it now?

“…”

‘…’

>”’Oh Spiiiiike!’”

>>28138575
You monsters!

Make Blueblood do it.

>Changeling
“Changelings’
~~~

>Okay, so how’s the battery thing going?

“We’re full!”

>Awesome!

“And we’re also empty.”

>…Confusing.

“Look, it’s like this, we fill up the batteries with love, yeah?”

>Yeah?

“But then it’s like… the love is out of us, yeah?”

>Huh… yeah.

“So then, if it’s out of us, it’s not in us. So then we feel very empty.”

“And we feel hungry.”

“So we want to take it back, but we can’t, because then it would be empty.”

>So… guess we have to wait for whitey face to come back before we continue, otherwise we’ll get hungry?

“Yep.”

>…

“…”

>…I’m noticing a flaw.

Oh look, it's the canon ending

https://derpibooru.org/1223162?scope=scpeab0e59f97b7d2d16cdec81a17930af2076308074

>>28139293
>Implying she'll need mind control at the ending.

Put a ring on it and say yes, he's down

>CC
"Derpy"
~~~~

>And that's why I'm running for mayor.

"Wha... What?"

>Do you really have that hard a time keeping up? Focus a little!... That came out meaner than I intended.

"Happens all the time, usually intentionally!"

>The time for sadness is later! For now, we need to find out where you lost track of the conversation.

"You... You were just reading your grocery list, then paused, stared out in space for a while, and said you were running for mayor. Are you okay?

>You fool! I was merely making an example! Winning will be so easy, I could do it without looking! I'm that good.

"... There has to be a easier way to say that."

>I would love to hear you try!

"Shooting fish in a barrel?"

>Brilliant!

"...you think the phrase is brilliant, right-"

>Get me a gun and a barrel, we are going to be rich!

"... I just don't know how this all happened..."

>Silver Spoon
“Spoiled Rich”
~~~

>You’re still not calling her back?

The filly’s face scrunched, her obvious displeasure rolling off the mare that was the focus of her ire without so much as ruffling her fur, her prim nose still pointed straight up as it so often was.

“Of course not, I can’t have my little darling turn tail and run, especially after that brutish farmer dragged her so far away! It would look like the princess was right, and I can’t have that.”

>She doesn’t have anything in her arsenal that can stop that thing now, she can barely even keep up without the armor!

“And yet, she’s staying on par with an alicorn, a princess who wields the Elements of Harmony no less, in the fight! Why, if anything, calling her back would be lunacy just for the story potential it loses. Think about this, my little Diamond, a shining example to all of Equestria far and wide, proving that no alicorn princess, even one with all that power, can stop them or hold them down. She’s an inspiration! Fillies and colts are going to be dressing up as her for Nightmare Night, putting her posters on the wall. My little darling is going to be a star…”

She leaned back, a wistful smile on her face. For a moment, Silver Spoon felt doubt, heard her words and considered them.

“And everyone is going to know I made her that star…”

That didn’t last long.

>If something happens to her….

“Oh pish posh, you’re being silly.”

She didn’t get a chance to say it, but she was going to think it, as she knew her words went unheard, and unheeded, as the filly’s mother dreamed.

“The greatest star in Equestria… just as soon as she cleans up this mess.”

Even if she wasn’t listening, and wouldn’t hear, the filly would say it.

>…I’ll blow you up first.

>>28139675
Part of me hopes Spoiled tries to get Daw as DT's sidekick

>Question...can I keep the spandex when I go home?

>>28139719
>Do I get power armor too?

"Ahahahahahahah!"

OOCO
>SA
“Celestia”
‘AJ’
~~

>You what!?

‘Ah’m sorry!’

“How could you lose my Laundromat ticket!?”

>Our Laundromat ticket! Ours! As in, both of us!

‘Three of us! Oh, Ah’ knew Ah’ shouldn’t have let them take mah’ hat.’

“It smelled like a dead bird wrapped in an old gym sock. Specifically, a dead bird. Not some other kind of dead thing wrapped in some other kind of sweaty article of clothing, a bird and a sock respectively. I don’t even know how you managed that.”

>Applejack, you’ve got to think! My favorite red shirt is in there!

‘Ya’ mean yer’ only red shirt.’

>I need no other shirts before it! It is the one that brings the sexy!

‘Ain’t that the purple armor? Way better lookin’.’

>…

“What? Ah’ like it better when it looks like ya’ work and got some stability, the other thing makes ya’ look like a freakin’ bellhop.”

>It makes me look princely!

“Prancely is more like it.”

>Don’t you start!

“Armor is sexier, just deal with it. You might want to just leave the shirt.”

>Well, I think you look better without the golden jewelry.

“R…really?”

>Yeah! You look way more natural.

‘What about me?’

>…We gotta find that ticket.

‘Wow.’

“Low blow, Shiny!”

>What? She looks better with the hat. Deny it, I dare you. You tell me she can’t rock the old west look and you tell me it’s not perfect with the hat!

‘…’

“...Yeah, let’s find that ticket, you do look way better. Completes the whole look, you know?”

‘Alright, guess yer’ right, Ah’ do gotta look to me.’

>…You ever wonder why you almost never see any ponies wear cloths?

‘It’s a dang mystery, that’s what it is.’

>>28140166
Just fuck already!

>>28140166
Is this gonna lead into Spike discovering nudity? Like in that one fanfic and then ends up informing Big Mac, Caramel and bunch of other guys and things get out of control for a bit? Just all of a sudden:

>They're naked... all of them are naked... EVERY GIRL IS NAKED! I need to tell the rest of the gu-

"SOAP!"

>FAUST! MY FUCKING EYES! AAAHHGH-

"YES, IT'S ME! DOUBLE SOAP POOOOOOOOOWER!"

>-URK!

"THAT'S FOR THE LANGUAGE!"

NC
>Pommel
“LD”
~~

>…
“…”
>…
“....”
>…You can say it you know, I won’t think any less of you.

“…Fine… your marefriend has some decent moves.”

>Ha ha! I think so much less of you now.

“ASSHOLE!”

>>28140599
Why NC? It's perfect.

>>28140166
APPLEJACK IS A BEAUTIFUL RUGGED FARMHORSE WHO NEEDS AN ACTUAL SOURCE OF LOVE AND AFFECTION DAMNIT

>77
“Harry”
~~

>Okay, so first day of recruiting didn’t go great.

“Grugh?”

>Yes, I know, understatement, ha ha ha you’re so funny because we’re understating and it’s all awful and you suck.

“Grugh.”

>No, that is not my fiancé- you shut up!

“Grugh!”

>Do not make me turn into a bear again! I can do it, I’m like a wild animal! Literally! That happens!

“Gurghgugh!”

>No, I am not a ‘broken ass changeling’, you’re a broken ass bear!

“GURGH!”

>I’m not taking it back and it’s not racist, you’re just a bear! NOT RACIST!

“GURRGUGUGU!

>YOU WANT TO GO!?

“GRUUUUUUUUUUUUGGGHHHHHHHHGGUUGH!”

>…Oh, shoot, you’re right, Fresh Prance is almost on. Way to keep track of time. We almost missed it! Want to go watch at the theater? My treat, I have a stipend now, don’t have to keep borrowing from Cheer’s.

“Gurhg.”

>Great!

“…gurgh.”

>Yes, I know she looks hot in the cheerleader outfit, why do you keep bringing that up?

“…gugh.”

>>28140636
OOCO
>AJ
"SA"
~~~

SLAM!

>Shinin'? Ah' need a hug.

"HUGS!"

>...Wow, just jumped right on that, didn't you?

"Two has conditioned me, it's a reflex at this point. Someone I like needs a hug, I hug. It's my lot in life."

>Huh.

"You want me to stop?"

>No.

"Can I ask why you needed a hug?"

>...no.

"Hugs and no questions it is!"

>...thanks.

"Trust me, I know."

>Ya' don't even know what...

"..."

>...

"I know. Let's hope she snaps out of it too."

>...yer' too smart fer' yer' own good sometimes.

File: applejack_jumping_for_joy_by_tardifice-d9et0uq.png (166KB, 949x841px) Image search: [Google]

166KB, 949x841px

>>28140862
yaaaaaaaaaaaaay

>>28140862
OOCO
>SA
"AJ"
~~~

SLAM!

>I need a hug.

"Kay."

>...I'm not sensing the enthusiasm expected.

"Yer' gettin' yer hug, ain't ya?"

>Factually correct, enough that continuing to argue would make me look a bit ungrateful...

"..."

>I'll take it.

"...Shining?"

>Hm?

"You'll figure it out."

>...

"..."

>...and you called me too smart for my own good...

>>28138575

{Spike}
~~~~

Glancing up without rhyme or reason, or without even knowing what pulled his gaze into that specific direction, Spike couldn't help but be overwhelmed with the urge to say,

{Fuck that, and fuck y'all.}

He blinked.

{Weird... where'd that come from?}

applejack will not ascend to princess till she tells the biggest truth of all. that truth being, that apple bloom is big mac and applejacks daughter

>>28141195
But she already princess tho.

>>28141131
OOCO
>Spike
"AJ"

Slam!

>I want a hug

"....Huh?"

>I want a hug, same way Shining gets them!

"And y'all figured this out, how?"

>I felt it, AJ..... I felt it

"Y'know, melancholy borrding dragons don't tend to get hugs"

>....Oh

"But Spike gets a hug"

>Oh

"....Not feelin' it all of a sudden or somethin'?"

>No, just feels like it's been too long

"Too changed"

>Mmm

"Mhmm"

>>28141135
OOCO
>Celestia
"AJ"
'SA"
~~~

>He's not coming.

"How can ya' know that?'

>Trust me, I know. A pony who may or may not have kind of but not completely raised them knows when their dragon is not going to listen to them. It's a sixth sense.

"Alright, options?"

'Burn the room? That's an option, just throwing it out there.'

>I want you to imagine that. No, really, take in the lovely scent right now, this horrible smell and all it's rankness, and then I want you to imagine that, but burning.

'...I'll never sleep again.'

>It only slows you down anyway. But with that option aside, what do we have?

"Dang it, we can figure this out! We're the leaders of gaddang nations! We protect the masses and make choices that can be life or death every freakin' day! Ain't no way we're gonna let somethin' as bad as a clogged toliet break us! Now, THINK!"

>...

'..."

"..."

'Bubble it and toss it into space?'

"Are you fuckin' with me right now? Are you, seriously? Because... that's what Ah'm talkin' about! What took you so long?"

'I don't know, but I wait no longer! I NEED THE POWER!'

>TAKE MY HOOF!

"AND MINE!"

'GRAAHHHHH!"

BOOMMMM!

>Problem solved!

"The day is saved!"

'...Who's going to put in the new bathroom?'

"Ah' don't know, Ah'll see if the custodian knows a..."

>...

'...'

"...Never speak of this again?"

>Going to be difficult with my bathroom currently in orbit.

'We've managed more embarrassing stuff than this.'

"We have, haven't we?"

>...

'...'

"...leaders of the world, everyone."

>>28141263
>Have a clogged toilet
>This is what they come up with

This is gold.

>>28141237
OOCO
>Poindexter
"AJ"
____

SLAM

"Oh fer' the love of applesauce-"

>I want a hug!

"What, why?"

>Because I'm in love with someone that I'm not even sure is capable of understanding the type of love I want to convey and even if I did manage to convey it just right I'd just be one-shotted straight past the moon, past Luna's buttcheek imprints, and into another galaxy and-"

"Hug."

>...

"..."

>...

"...Better? Ah' can't tell, y'all kinda just slumped into me...."

>So. Much. Better. Wow, Shining was right, you give some surprisingly great hugs, princess.

"Surprisingly? Huh, not sure iffin' Ah' should be offended or not...."

>Definitely not. Whew! Boy, do I feel better! Thanks, princess, I'll be back!

"No, really, y'all don't ever have to-"

KASLAM

"...okay, fine. Ah'll be here."

>>28141399
OOCO
>Luna
"AJ"
~???~
~~~

SLAM!

>Fellow Princess, Applejack! I need-

"OH DEAR LORD NO! None for you!"

>What? What art thou speaking of, and what does it have to do with out new moonpie cake?

"Oh... ohhhh! Ya' just wanted ta' order a cake. Okay."

>What did thou think we meant?

"Pfft, everyone keeps comin' in here askin' for hugs. Ah' think Shiny set 'em off, dang contagious bubblehorse."

>Oh... and, thou did not wish us any hugs...

"...er-"

>No no! Tis fine! Tis totally fine! We wanted none all the same, merely just came in for... for our cakes, the thing which brings us joy for a brief time as it fills us with a sweet feeling no other does... b-because we don't have any others.

"...u-uhh-"

>You know what? We're good.

SLAM!

"...Ah've made a terrible mistake."

~~~~

~Okay, while why you would wish to hug someone like Trixie is obvious, because she's great, Trixie wishes to know why-~

>BE SILENT AND HUG HARDER!

~Yesma'amasmuchasyouwantma'ampleastacceptthehugs..~

>>28141237
Heheh

Oh

That's actually kinda sobering

>AJ and Spike have been apart so long, they've changed and don't recognise eachother like they used to be.

>>28141502
They literally just went on a vacation together, POST Apple-crazy and everything.

That said, we all remembered what happened the last time a mare he had a crush on changed...

>>28141263
These three clearly have a vastly untapped comedy potential...

>>28141195
>That's right, yer' our daughter... in the sense we're yer' legal guardians, which ain't really daughter you'd think, but apparently SOMEBODY fer'got to make a damn law saying you can be someone's legal guardian without being officially recognized as their parent/grandparent. Would it have been too much work just to make a damn box more!? The shit Ah' put up with...

>>28141756
We tapped it plenty. It is just very deep.

>>28142095
We really need to get them more in arcs together, ever notice how rarely they act together in one?

>>28142214
Because AJ is mostly at odds with Best Pair outside of these one shots. She barely respects Shiny, but won't give him the time of day. And Celestia she seems to only have two modes for "It's your fault shit sucks, fix it" for day to day stuff and "Fuck you, why do I have to do this?" for when life is actually hard and Celestia won't just step in.

>>28142274
Welp, that's what these OOCO stories are for. Bridging gaps for a near or far future. By the time an arc for them rolls around they'll have a far better understanding for each other.

>>28142274
>She barely respects Shiny
Que

>>28142274
>She barely respects Shiny,

I think that's a little disingenuous, they had a real heart-to-heart back in the beach-arc, and even before that they had a lot of time together musing on how they both wanted normal lives initially.

Sure, early days she didn't like him at all, and sometimes she resents him being an enabler, but she's got respect for him.

>>28142274
That's baloney, they only don't interact much during arcs because they are often on other side of the world, or in their own story line. They just each have their own set of characters they work with, and they are the respective ringleaders of each set. Shining is obviously the protagonist of the ones from the empire, while AJ is obviously the ones from the Main Place. Well, she is now at least, it used to be Spike. Point is, they could interact, they just usually end up opposite each other because their arcs are opposite of each other.

>>28142486
Clearly, we need an arc featuring solely those two

Spike and Celestia can tag along

>>28142371
>>28142426
>>28142486
Mad that I said barely respects Shiny, someone she hardly sees. No one refutes how she acts to the one of the ones she interacts with most.

>>28142509
Nah, make it a double threesome date. 18/Cadence/Shiny with AJ/Rarity/Spike.

>>28142511
>No one refutes how she acts to the one of the ones she interacts with most.
Cause she actually interacts with Celly during arcs, we don't need to explain why that's dumb.

>>28142529
Oh god I don't think I can handle another date arc...

>>28142509
>solely those two
>Spike and Celestia can tag along

>Solely
>Others can tag along

wut

OOCO
>AJ
"SA"
'Celestia'
~~~

>This hot tub better have come out of yer' cake fund.

"Nahhh, I bought it for her, we had a bit of a surplus."

'He treats me so fancy!'

>Ya'll never bought me nothin'. Ah'm feelin' a sense of favoritism.

"But I gave you friendship! You can't put a price on that."

>Yeah, cause there ain't no lower number than 'nothing'.

'This is why he buys me hot tubs and you get sass.'

>Least Ah'm gettin' somethin' out of this.

"Hey! I invited you to the hot tub!"

'Which was rude, it's my hot tub.'

"But I bought it!"

'And I showed my appreciation with a knowing smile, before claiming entirety ownership of the whole thing.'

"I feel slightly used."

>Don't be silly, ya'll are massively used, we don't do anything slightly.

"USED!"

'That's the point, yes. But not to worry, we still love you!'

>As long as ya' give us stuff.

"But this whole conversation happened because I didn't give you anything."

>...

"...oh."

>>28142529
By the laws of Narrative Causality, that date will probably be interrupted by Chitania absorbing the powers of Red, Lavan, and the other two gods, then getting into a tag team fight with Hivemind-connected Sunset against Faust and Craig while Pennydrop launches an invasion of Equestria and all the demons in Tartarus decide to rebel against Cheerilee and bathe the world in fire.

>>28142928
...so that's what an aneurysm feels like.

>>28142928
Would it go that bad?

The Spike/AJ date was completely worry and conflict free.

Whenever the threesome go on a date, something major happens in the Empire regarding their leaders.

You'd think they'd just cancel each other out and have a very annoying but ultimately uneventful date.

>>28143197
The way to make it conflict free is to have Chrysalis get her ass beat at the same time.

>>28133558
>Shining learned to pull bags of marshmallows out of nowhere from Pinkie, for 'Code Blue' emergencies, as long as he doesn't think too hard about it.
Shining is best Dad.

>>28143313
>le olden thread Maymay

>>28143313
Wait, if we really wanted to invert it...

Wouldn't we just invite her?

>>28138338
>Ah' was right... jackass, a right jackass Ah' meant.

>>28143754
Foursome date?

But who will AJ take along for her fourth? Celly?

>>28144452
DT.

Just to duck with some heads.

>>28144793
Mess with them or no, you would at least get one hell of a reaction. From you know who.

Night, thread.

File: PRINCESS APPLEJACK ANDY PRICE OFFICIAL.jpg (2MB, 2448x3264px) Image search: [Google]

2MB, 2448x3264px

https://derpibooru.org/images/1223771

CANON
A
N
O
N

File: OH_YES.jpg (20KB, 284x285px) Image search: [Google]

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>>28146097
Yeeeeeesssss.... YESSSSSSSSS!

I thank the collective human subconscious for this gift!

>>28146097
Now THAT, is bad ass. Based apple princess.

>>28146097
That is pretty cool, gotta admit. guess he did one for everyone?

>>28146097
Alright, was it a /pa/l who did it? Gotta know.

>>28146567
Maybe, the only one I see is the AJ one.

>>28146097
Nicely slick

>>28146097
Soon... it shall become as it should.

>>28146118
Everyone secretly knows who best princess is. Everyone.

https://twitter.com/AndyPriceArt/status/764229752295153664


The Perler Pony @ThePerlerPony 17h

@AndyPriceArt I see that the best series of /mlp/ threads is slowly leaking into reality!


ALRIGHT, COUGH IT UP, WHO HERE'S RESPONSIBLE FOR THIS

>>28149214
Not me.

But I find it funny as all fuck.

NC
>RD
"Twilight"
~~~

>...

"..."

>...

"..."

>...The fuck just happened.

"I think we all got Discorded or something..."

NC
>Dash
“Pinkie’
~~~

>Oh damn it, not zombies again!

“Braaiiin-wait, why aren’t you freaking out?”

>Because I can at least kill these ones, instead of them having broken ass regeneration!

“How… how do you know that?”

>How do you think?

“…uh oh.”

>Twilight
"Rainbow Dash"

>Hey Dash, what are you up to?

"Jokes™"

>>28149678
Not gonna lie, any part of our zombie arc was better.

>>28149441
Mare-do-well syndrome, twilight. You relapsed and infected the town.

>>28150456
>Not gonna lie, any part of our zombie arc was better.

IT'S HAPPENING AGAIN

>>28150532
Is being up our own ass for thinking we can write better than professionals or that we keep doing ideas first.

>>28150557
Both

Let's go with both

>>28150557
Both

Though then again, we aren't exactly fettered by Hasbro oversight and a small child demographic.

>>28150575
Wait, does that mean I should stop letting my five-year-old read these stories? I thought they were supposed to be bedtime stories for children.

>>28150607
Why are you showing your child the fan fiction of 50+ autism fueled manchildren on a Kazakhstani Goose Breeding imageboard?

>>28150636
>>>28150607
>Kazakhstani Goose Breeding imageboard?

>MUHAMMED! HAVE YOU SEEN NEWEST GOOSE BREED YET?! IS AMAZING!

NC
>Dash
“Twilight”
~~~

>Why rainbows?

“We wanted to all look like you gave us an STD.”

>…

“Just kidding, it’s just for a reference to a movie that hopefully no child watching has ever seen.”

>…

“…what?”

>..how did you know it comes out rainbows.

“I… I was just making a joke-“

>HOW DID YOU KNOW!?

File: 128121__safe_pinkie+pie_artist-colon-maplesunrise_hot+chocolate_nightcap_ask+snuggle+pie.png (282KB, 1000x1000px) Image search: [Google]

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Non-Canon
>Pinkie
"Cadence"
'DT'
[Harry]
~~~~
>Welcome to Not Late Night /pa/ with your hosts the Pink Pony Club! It's during this time that content does matter, but bears aren't cheap!

"I'm the pretty one!"

'I'm the grumpy one.'

>And I'm the crazy one!

>"'Now for our main guest...HARRY THE BEAR!!!'"

[Grrrgh.]

>Now that you've been making more appearances, what do you hope will happen?

[Grrrgh-]

"That's real nice Harry, but this is the end of the show!"

[Grrragh!]

'Eh, it's what we do.'

>But thanks for joining us and we'll see everypony next time.

>"'Byyyyyye!'"

Harry wakes up.
[....grrrgh.]

>>28151900
... Okay.

OOCO
>SA
“AJ”
‘Celestia’
~~~

>Applejack, why!?

“Ah’ didn’t know! Look at me, look at me right now, does it look like Ah’ knew!? Look at me!”

‘No! This is my one thing! My one defining feature!’

“…”

‘One of them, and the most obvious!’

“…”

‘From behind, at least!’

“…”

‘YOU KNOW WHAT I MEAN!’

“Again, ya’ll are yellin’ at me like Ah’ wanted any of this ta’ happen, and ain’t in the same boat as you all are.”

>It’s your fault, you brought the shampoo!

“How was Ah’ supposed ta’ know that Rarity kept friggen purple hair dye in the shower!... Actually, this is raisin’ a lot of questions.”

‘No time! We have to figure out a way to go back to normal!’

“We could just dye it back.”

>That blue streak is impossible to get right in my hair.

‘And I don’t know if you’ve noticed, nobody sells ‘magical luminescent Aurora Borealis down at the supermarket!’

“Ain’t mah’ fault ya’ll gotta complicate yer’ hair.”

>You’re in this with us, like it or not!

“Well, Ah’ guess we could just ask Rarity when it wears off… but then we’d have to tell her we all took a shower at the same time.”

>…if we told her the real reason why, do you think she’d believe-

“No.”

>Ah… and-

“And she’ll probably figure it out when she sees us.

‘I see… so, of course, the only answer is that we all dye our hair something else, but of course that will leave everyone wondering why, so I propose that on three, we all say what we’re thinking. One two three-

>”’We lost a bet and it’s all your fault.”’

>Perfect.

“Go with pink…Ya’ll look good with pink hair.”

‘Thank you!’

“Was talkin’ to him.”

>…meh, so long as everyone else is.

“With that settled… we gonna find out why she has-“

>’Yes.’

>>28152373
Threes company is really weird in Equestria..,

OOCO
>AJ
“SA”
~???~
~~~
“Does she still slam your doors?”

>Shinin’, Ah’m pretty sure that long after yer’ put in the ground, this world crumbles ta’ dust and the sun goes out, she’s gonna find a door somewhere in the empty void of creation, and she’s gonna slam it. Iffin’ Ah’ die first, she’s gonna find the door ta’ the afterlifer, and slam it. Right in mah’ face. Ah’ will never be rid of it.

“…You really didn’t have to add in that first bit.”

>Ah’ don’t have to do a lot of things, but ya’ would smile more iffin’ Ah’ did them.

“I’m lost.”

>See, this is why Ah’ don’t do like you and Celly do.

“Ignoring that, you know there’s a way to keep her out, right?”

>Ah’d love to hear it-

SLAM!
~CONSLAMMA! Chrysalis is here bitches-~
WHAM!

>…You absolute madman… that’s brilliant.

SLAM
~The fuck was that-~
WHAM!

SLAM!
~You showed her the-~
WHAM!

SLAM
~-you monster I’ll-~
WHAM!

SLAM!
~-right up your fuzzy white-~
WHAM

SLAM
~-bastard from the pits of tartarus-~
WHAM

SLAM
~-still do you though-~
WHAM!

SLAM
~-butter cream down your thighs-~
WHAM

SLAM
~-if you’re really good get some-~
WHAM

SLAM!
~-wouldn’t let anyone else but-~
WHAM

SLAM!
~-as long as you finish in my-~
WHAM

SLAM!
~-OOOOOTTTYYYYYY!~
WHAM!

>…

“…”

>…Is she done? Did you really just beat her with a dang spring on mah’ wall? Am Ah’ free!?

CRASH!

>MAH WINOW!

~NOTHING CAN STOP ME!~

>WHY!?

“You know, all this time… I’ve never found an answer for that.”

~HAH!~

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Non-Canon
>Pinkie
"Cadence"
'DT'
~~~~
>Welcome to Not Late Night /pa/ with your hosts the Pink Pony Club! It's during this time that content does matter, but we feel like fitting this in! Now for our main segment...THE DREAM BAR!!!

>Here's your chips and salsa. Why the long face?

'I've been out of school for a while, but I'm having problems finding a job.'

"You're worrying too much. You're still young. Just find a low paying job."

'Turns out the low paying jobs have stiff competition and require experience. The only ones that get hired are the ones that already know how to flip hayburgers.'

>You can do what a friend I know does. Stay at home and write short stories.

'How does that get me paid?'

>It doesn't!

'I feel stuck in an endless cycle of having no experience, but can't get experience without a job.'

"I know what you can do! You need to find somepony with a job and marry them so you don't have to work!"

'I uh...don't know how to flirt.'

>Then you're screwed! Do what normal ponies do. Complain about it and drown it away in root beer!

"Yeah! NEET life is the best life!"

'...I don't think this sketch is as funny as we think.'

>>28153233
You cannot stop the bug.

She will find a way.

>>28153295
Doy, just use your connections and game the system! It's easy!

>Changeling
“Changelings”
~~~

>Alright, all of them are charged and loaded up… where do we put them now.

“…huh.”

“I don’t think 42 ever actually gave us a destination!”

“She just kinda… told us to make it, and then hold it.”

“I mean, I guess she might be waiting to learn where we’re going to ship it to.”

“So… so…”

“So she just had us fill up a whole bunch of charged magic containers full of power, who might be a little unstable if tampered with wrong…”

>… and they all have blinking lights.

“”””””””””””””…….””””””””””””””

>We’re doomed.

>>28153758
Blinky things? With MY changelings?

It's more deadly than you think.

File: EvoLogo.png (24KB, 277x212px) Image search: [Google]

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~~~

Far away from the battle taking place in the midst of Equestria's finest city of white, in one of the southernmost corners of the country, the land itself was changing.

What was once a tiny hamlet with less than a hundred souls accounted for was slowly being overshadowed by tall spires of gleaming steel and glass rising into the sky like the outstretched digits of a beast trying to reach Heaven itself.

The tiny mine upon which the industrious ponies living in the shadow of the high rim of the massive, round valley has been substituted by an ever-growing industry; machines, ponies and diamond dogs alike churning out massive quantities of gleaming gems from the every soil beneath.

It would've been unthinkable just a year ago. To the common pony, it was mind-boggling, it was far-fetched, it was an industrial revolution.

It was the EVO corporation.

In the midst of the valley known as The Hoof, twelve of the highest ranking employees of the up-and-coming corporation for everything the people of the modern era that was creeping in on the whole world had assembled in in a large office with an oval table in its middle. Aside from the usual comforts such as a fully automatic coffee machine and air-conditioning, the office offered a fantastic view of the development outside through the ground-to-ceiling glass panes.

„Good day, and welcome to all of you on our...“

Scarlet Cherry, the blonde-maned mare at the head of the table slightly turned her head to gaze at the clock hung up at the wall. Digital and capable of adjusting itself to a nanosecond through its connections to the recently built radio-towers all across the country, it showed her it was, indeed, time for them to begin.

Still, she allowed the various ponies around her to sigh, groan and adjust themselves on their chairs before continuing.

„...third meeting this week since we established our HQ in Hoofington. Please have a seat.“


1/6

>>28154144

Another series of sighs and grunts as stallions and mares who had never been comfortable in a suit tried to get comfortable. In vain, for the most part.

„Let us cut straight to the meat of the matter.“

„Hear, hear.“

Turning her head to her immediate left, she looked upon a stallion who, not too long ago, had been her direct rival in a far shadier kind of business.

„How are the redevelopment efforts in Baltimare going?“

Now, Comet Crush, smiled patiently at her, his manecut perfect, his coat groomed, his suit holding to his muscular frame as if he'd been taught to wear one since his childhood.

„Everything's happening on a timely schedule. Given how much horsepower we have available to us at this time, I'd say we should be finished with renovations by the end of summer.“

„That's good news. And have you considered what we discussed last week?“

„Ordering a batch of Fawtaine's best infusions? Yes. But it's simply not profitable at this point. With how many reformed hoolig-“

The mare's lip twitched, and she cut him off before he could continue.

„I told you not to call them that.“

And not too long ago, he would've leapt across the table and taken her tongue for slighting him like that.

„I apologize.”

But those days were just like their pasts selves: long gone, so he began anew.

“To reiterate: With how many previously unemployed, hopeless and slash or criminal elements we can count on thanks to our funding their new neighborhood and education, it's pointless to needlessly amp them up on glorified drugs.“

The mare to the right of the stallion spoke, frowning slightly. Once, she'd been known as Killer Queen, a mare who would callously use and abuse her lovers and rivals alike without a second thought.

„Especially if you consider how many of them currently are in our on-site detox treatment and therapy.“

2/6

>>28154153

Everyone knows as Queen Bee now, head of the personnel management and fussy about the well-being of everyone else to the point of having earned herself the name Mama Bee, much to her embarrassment.

„Speaking of Fawntaine; I'd like to hold a brief count of hooves about their recent offer of a merger. All against, please raise your hooves.“

Not a single word was uttered, all present keenly aware of the weight of their choice, given whom they were dealing with.

„I count 4 in favor, eight against. So that concludes that, thank you.“

While the blonde mare at the head of the table scribbled down the result, with small margin notes on the side on how she intended to deal with the ensuring paperwork, the gimlet-eyed stallion three seats to her right spoke up.

„Really? That's it? No further comments, no discussion on how we should deal with our greatest competitor.“

She looked up, quizzical but feeling none of the annoyance she felt she should at being called out like that during daily proceedings, allowing Lightning Thunder to continue.

„I doubt it is wise to rebuke the great white shark in the small kiddie pool that is the Equestrian industrial network. Then again, as our kindly benefactors let us clearly know, we have no interest in butting in on the kind of business THEY are running.““

Recomposed, the Scarlet spoke up again.

„You sound like you have given this more thought than the rest of us. What do you propose?“

„To put it simply, a feint. By feigning internal quarrels that are usually the norm within companies growing beyond their capacities too quickly, I could split a 200 pony division from our Research and Development team to make it look like I am trying to strike out on my own after being fed up with EVO's working conditions.“

Another mare at their table, Amethyst Spark, spoke up.

„Oooh, I see. Working with the enemy. Not bad, not bad.“


3/6

>>28154159

„Rest assured, I enjoy my new lease on life quite a lot. I am merely doing this for the sake of the company.“

They all smiled in uncanny unision.

"We know."

„Hrmm... I see. Well, I will fabricate some paperwork and gossip in advance to make it seem more credible I also suggest we have a dispute or two out in the open where we can be heard and seen.“

„Certainly. Over our usual coffee around twelve?“

„Sounds lovely.“

Without any form dispute or fight, four of them had managed to make a complex agreement that'd require precise timing and unspoken cooperation within minutes. Yet, as astounding this feat was after years of rivalry and infighting, more points on their agenda needed addressing, so Scarlet continued.

„Ahem! Onto the next point of our agenda. How are our projects in Hoofington proceeding?“

„The enucleation of the rich gem fields is going smoothly since we included the diamond dog population into our efforts, though they are letting us know -quite vocally at that- that they will not tolerate further infringement onto their territories.“

„Really? Are they AWARE that we are building an entire industrial complex in the middle of The Hoof's valley?“

Several murmurs of agreement came from around the table in response to that.

„I believe they are in fierce denial about that, no mater how many times we tell them. We will just have to see that we live in peaceful coexistence with our unexpected neighbors.“

„I suppose so... and if all else fails, ask our mutual friends to, ah... pay them a visit, yes?“

Silence, this one far more awkward than the last as they all studied one-another calculatingly. That was, until a pair of hooves were slammed onto the table with enough force to make everyone present wince.

„Well, since none of you tossers wants to address the buffalo in the room, I'll do the honors.“


4/6

>>28154167

„Well, since none of you tossers wants to address the buffalo in the room, I'll do the honors.“
Stripes, one of the most volatile elements known within the very same criminal underground they all used to work in stood on his hindlegs, bloodshot eyes bugging out of his skull, spittle flying from his lips as he shouted.

„ARE YOU FUCKING OUT OF YOUR FAUSTDAMNED MINDS?!“

Despite the display of open hostility and insult, none of them moved as the bull of a half-zebra started pointing at them, shaking with restrained rage.

“Are we seriously going to sit here and run an entire new empire built on the shambles of who we were and all we previously fought for, knowing full FUCKING well that we are doing so because they are FREAKING CONTROLLING OUR MINDS?!”

If Stripes was expecting denials, aggression or even one of his former rivals or allies to bat an eye, he was sorely disappointed. The eleven ponies around him just stared at him, silently and judging, a metaphorically united front against him.

“Are you quite done?”

And Scarlet as their spokesperson, her eyes sharp. Of all the assembled former bad apples of society, she'd been the one who had taken to going white collar the easiest and fastest, almost as if it'd been her calling, her destiny, if her life hadn't taken a turn for the worse in her youth. She stood before a stallion who towered two heads above her, muscles almost as thick as her neck, the tales of his savage brutality enough to make even hardened stallions shake.

But instead of fear, all Stripes could see in Scarlet's eyes was resolution... and an alien glow of barely visible green. The same green all of his colleagues had in their eyes, if one looked closely enough and knew what they were looking for.

Stripes' voice was smaller now, hitching, peaking and falling as he felt the precious power he had held over his own mind gradually slip.


5/6

>>28154175

“How does it make you feel, knowing that your judgment and decisions are premeditated by someone else?! How does it make you feel, having all your own instincts, wants, desires and needs suppressed to work for a 'greater good'?!”

One last time, he inhaled deeply, to shout at her, baring his teeth.

“HOW DO YOU FEEL!?”

And all the blonde mare did was what came naturally.

She smiled.

Scarlet smiled the calm, patient smile of a pony at peace with herself. When all he could shudder and look away from her, she turned her back to the one stallion in the room who would have had the most reason and desire to harm her at this very moment to walk back to her seat.


“I feel safe.”

>>28154181
what

what the fuck

>>28154181
who made this

is this some super sekrit sub plot that Sunset Shitter's cooking up

or are you honest to goodness cramming a fucking Industrial Base of OC's into the mix

cos god fucking damnit we've got too damn many already

>>28154216
Well they seem to be normal ponies at least. Not another whole new batch of amazing ohsounique Changelings people fan cram their fetish or waifu fawning onto

>>28154181
ah christ you know wjhat the fuck this subplo9t is

it's fucking tower of babylon that's what it is

you're writing up this plot where the highest echelons of equestria are written into existence, then they'll be made up to be unstobppable, near Deus Ex like conspiring behemoths faaaar above our main cast

then when the fallout inevitable comes, you're inadvertently saddling fucking E V E R Y O N E to clean it all up to try to restore some status quo

the bigger you're making this, the fucking harder it's gonna be for the rest of us, I'm not the least bit intereseted in magic mind control corporate politics and espionage in my small horse fanfiction, not writing it one bit.

and god DAMN imma have to write my stuff KNOWING that theres a great big steaming turd of a narrative plotpoint i need to clean up if i want to go anywhere

thanks

>>28154181
>>28154260
This. To whomever is writing this subplot, it sounds interesting, but you better have a cleanup strategy for how to deal with it afterwards without shoving a ton of Status Quo changes or "Canon" changes on us out of nowhere. It would be like if Pommel-anon ended Pommel's Adventures with the whole cast being stranded in Pirateland.

>>28154181
Interesting moral questions...

Did not expect this today.

>>28154181
Well if sunset wasn't doomed to fail before, trying to steal AJ's eventual victory over PD sealed it.

>>28154144
>>28154153
>>28154159
>>28154167
>>28154175
>>28154181

I can tell you right now that no body has ever used
>„
To start a sentence in our writing before, in all the stories that have been written here. This is obviously someone recent, tuu-nuu, or even a clever shitposter trying to cause trouble.

Someone needs to fess up now.

>>28154144
>>EvoLogo.png
>Actual logo looks like it was made from some edit of existing image and uploaded onto deviantart
>worry.png
>>Far away from the battle taking place in the midst of Equestria's finest city of white, in one of the southernmost corners of the country, the land itself was changing.
>Attention is suddenly yanked wih great gravitas away from main event
>>It would've been unthinkable just a year ago. To the common pony, it was mind-boggling, it was far-fetched, it was an industrial revolution.
>Whatever it is it is supremely important to the thread as a whole
>>It was the EVO corporation.
>No mention, either in canon or by anons prior to this post
>alarmbells.mp3
>> twelve of the highest ranking employees of the up-and-coming corporation for everything the people of the modern era that was creeping in on the whole world had assembled
>make that supremely important and no doubt will affect the main cast for yonks to come by nature alone
>>ts connections to the recently built radio-towers all across the country
>YourAppointmentToFEMAShouldBeFinalizedWithinTheWeek.exe

This is getting.... too big

>>28154359
... Yes they have?

And I think you're being super paranoid here.

>>28154310
>>28154260
What is there to bitch about. When Sumset goes down everyone from that last bit just goes back to being warring gangs. All getting Fawntine involved for is to steal some of their shit.

>>28154181
So what is this actually?

Like, I read it but still, what is this and where is it going?

Is it CD? Is it something that was already previously established?

The thread as a whole needs some answers here.

>>28154388
Paranoid? Maybe... maybe... but >>28149214 happened, so someone split the beans and while it might ultimately lead to nothing major, there might still be a few curious cats. Just saying, we can't be too careful with our scrutiny.

>>28154388
>>28154388
>Being unsure and deflecting by calling the other person out.
Well that didn't seem suspicious at all.

>>28154216
>who made this
I didn't realize we were name fagging now.

>is this some super sekrit sub plot that Sunset Shitter's cooking up
I think we have all together ruled that she's too ineffective to get anything good or bad done when she intends to. It's more funny when it does the opposite.

>or are you honest to goodness cramming a fucking Industrial Base of OC's into the mix
I didn't hear any sobbing cries when an entire species of OCS turned up.

>cos god fucking damnit we've got too damn many already
I agree. They are mostly throwaway names one might use to show they are people too, not just faceless mooks.

>>28154260
>you're writing up this plot where the highest echelons of equestria are written into existence, then they'll be made up to be unstobppable, near Deus Ex like conspiring behemoths faaaar above our main cast
No. They are just former crooks forced to do good. And most of them are starting to enjoy relent in control to someone else. It's called beehive syndrome. If someone REALLY wanted to write it, they could make them all fall. Just... don't do that yet.

>then when the fallout inevitable comes, you're inadvertently saddling fucking E V E R Y O N E to clean it all up to try to restore some status quo
This won't be 'Fawntaine's Secret Splicer Lab v2' or anything of that magnitude if it's that what you mean.

>the bigger you're making this, the fucking harder it's gonna be for the rest of us, I'm not the least bit intereseted in magic mind control corporate politics and espionage in my small horse fanfiction, not writing it one bit.
I am not sorry for not catering to your highly specific, subjective needs, dear reader.

>>28154434
It was established before, those are the crime lords Sunset and Chitty zotzed.

And the Evo thing was established later, with the two climbing one of the towers.

>>28154216
>you're writing up this plot where the highest echelons of equestria are written into existence, then they'll be made up to be unstobppable, near Deus Ex like conspiring behemoths faaaar above our main cast
They're are merely well connected former crooks working together in forced harmony for the first time.

>and god DAMN imma have to write my stuff KNOWING that theres a great big steaming turd of a narrative plotpoint i need to clean up if i want to go anywhere
EVO is an excuse to explain rapidly spreading technology available to everyone, not just supermech and pseudoscience for mega battles. Stuff like Applejack CALLING Celestia from afar or Fuzzy and the Buzz having ACTUAL, explainable radios to have their show on would be nice.

>thanks
You're welcome. Try not to be so negative next time?

>>28154310
>you better have a cleanup strategy for how to deal with it afterwards without shoving a ton of Status Quo changes or "Canon" changes on us out of nowhere.
The only real change I would ask to be acknowledged is that modern technology we can find in our world is more and more common in Equestria. Mostly because EVO is bringing it to the common ponies, instead being a superpower weapons developer like Fawntaine. It's a background arc

>>28154321
>Interesting moral questions...
We established that AJ's counterparts are dark reflections of her choices. So now that she has turned down controlling everyone for a better tomorrow, we have EVO (or Sunset, if you will) to show what it could have brought.

>>28154359
>This is obviously someone recent, tuu-nuu, or even a clever shitposter trying to cause trouble.
Are we starting to be elitis about our fanon now? I'd rather we didn't.

>>28154434
EVO had been mentioned before, when their radio towers were being set up, and it was implied that Sunset drew all those nefarious underground organisations together to facilitate making Chitania's super armor. What you see now is merely what evolved out of her actions

>>28154463
>>28154565
I hope that answers everything the rest of you needs to work with. Yes, there's a plan. No, you can easily play around with the whole thing, don't worry. It's all planned out and malleable, and has a definitive, non-world-crisis-level resolution.

>>28154542
Thank you for paying attention.

>>28154565
>Mostly because EVO is bringing it to the common ponies,
Well there's a major issue, given how this barely shows up in anyone elses stories.

Going from pre-industrial to modern information-era technology is a nasty leap, not even buffering the changeover via "shit loads of magic" isn't gonna make this jarring.

The robots were one thing but now it's getting ridiculous.

>>28154589
>Fawntaine has flying UFOS with long range vidual-audio communucations.

>The Gryphons habe blimps and actual, intervening gods.

>Most superpowers have Metal Gear class mexhs thanks to Fawntaine.

>Common ponies can get super powers through infusions

We are FAR out of pre-industrial,and have been for a while. It'd be reasonable if it was an even change, not just technology spikes for onetime stories.

>>28154611
War/Battle/Conflict makes uneven technology spikes all the time, take a look at history everywhere and you'll see that it's just the way it is. Survival is the goal of War, to Survive you need to be able to get and do things that are Necessary and Necessity is the mother of all invention.

With everything that's happened, it makes sense.

>>28154611
You forgot the Twilight Moon/SPAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAACE Suits.

>>28154679
And the same technology became household appliances and everyday items not too long after. You have to consider that since Twilight came into contact with the portal, she's forcibly brought 'the future' into Equestria, whether anyone wanted it or not.

Now Sunset is waltzing around, uninhibited and with a saddlebag full of schematics and books, and she's apparently letting them be put to use.

>>28154689
Oh yeah. They were in space already too.

>>28154689
Why haven't we gone back to space Anons!?

.........Ayyyyyy

OOCO
>Spike
“SA”
‘Poindexter’
~Cadence~
(Zephyr)
~~~~

>…

“So, you guys ready to roll?

‘…’

“I think we’re ready to roll”

~…~

“Yep… anyone want to start? Dex, all you buddy. Roll them bones and show us what kind of adventure we’re going on!”

‘…’

“Or, you know, Spike could give us some context. Worldbuild, Spike! Let’s hear the amazing and spectacular landscape that we’re about to embark on! What wonders await? Who knows! That’s for you to tell. Sing us, bard!”

>…

“Or hey, Cadence, you always wanted to go first, didn’t you? Let’s see what you can do! Go on, Honey, all you! It’s your time to shine!”

~…~

“…Or we could-“

>Or we could get Zephyr to a hospital.

“Pfft, he’s fine.”

(MYYYY LEEEGGGGSSSS!)

“See? He’s talking about his legs. Loves to talk about himself, that guy! A lot! At really inappropriate times! But that’s the fun. That’s why we invite him. He’s great.”

‘Okay, Shiny, I’ll agree him throwing his hoof over Cadence’s shoulder was a bit out of line… but I see bone.’

“Happened on Empire soil, not illegal!”

>I feel like snapping both forelegs should be at the very least frowned upon, regardless of him saying he how tall he is in all areas.

“No one will convict me!”

‘That’s… sadly true.’

>Cadence? Going to chime in here? Your husband just broke Fluttershy’s brother like a cracker.

~…Shiny? That was wrong.~

“Oh… I’m sorry-“

~You should have left a foreleg for me.~

>…
‘…’
“…I am so turned on right now.”

(PAAIIINNNNN!)

I mean I can see the point. Pinkie Pie is planning to build her second giant floating sky fortress theme park and no one is even batting an eye at it

>Twinklejinx
"Book"
[???]

>Ok! Ok I think I lost him. Just needed to toss your infernal orchestra off in a different direction.

"Crying shame, I miss music, I used to make a point to keep minstrels and bards around in the old. Granted their song were mostly pleas for me to spare them and their loved ones but the noises were pretty."

>Silence yourself! You'll bring him back!

"I don't make noise though."

>...STILL! This world is stranger and craftier than I could have possibly imagined, we will have to be careful if we are to-whatwasthat!?

"What was what?"

>That noise...oh no.

"Oh no what, what is? ...oh...ohhhh this is gonna be good."

[...a creature of bones, truly fate has blessed me!]

>Nice doggy...niiiiice doggy!

"Oh I wish you could see my face right now, hang on, I'll illustrate it."

>SHOO! SHOO I SAY!

[I will bury you...and then dig you up later!]

CHOMP!

>AAAHHHH!

>Blueblood
“PJ”
‘???’
~~~

>I told you I would stop you. Didn’t believe a word I said, did you? Well, I’ll have you know I am a stallion of my word, and my word is bond!

“MRPHMAMAM!”

>Yes, I know, you don’t have to curse, but I swear this is only because I don’t want to see you hurt.

“MHMRRMRM!”

>I know it seems odd, considering my previous attitudes, but if there is one thing my many mistakes have taught me, it’s that sometimes choosing the path without battle is the wiser one. Sometimes, though it hurts, we must accept that there are those who simply want to see us well, and do things that seem painful and awful not to hurt us, but to bring out the best in us. It feels terrible when it’s happening, but in time… you will understand as I did.

“MPRH!... Mrph… mmrr….”

>Thank you, and I want you to know… I think I-

‘Uh, Bluey?’

>Oh! Arana! I’m so sorry, I didn’t know you were there. I’m sorry, me and PJ are just having a disagreement about her engaging in the battle, don’t be alarmed.

‘Well, I ain’t for that reason.’

“M…muh…”

>She’s right, while I’m sure it’s frightening, no doubt will the heroes of the land soon handle this ghastly thing and bring peace to the land once again.

‘That’s great… so are ya’ gonna wait until she’s done to stop sitting on her? I hope the princess hurries up in that case, she’s turning blue.’

>…OH CRAP!