Equestrian Invasion: "Never get a car" Edition

File: 1402693800180.jpg (12KB, 300x448px) Image search: [Google]

12KB, 300x448px

>>27911551


Another week, another Eq.I thread.

Last week turned to shit. I worked 12h night shifts, and of some reason Dapper couldn't get us rolling either.
Anyway, we're back, and with a vengeance.
So what have you fags been up to?

>>27911565

>The air over the table expectedly turns sour, while the girls munch away.
>"Ahem- so! What's the plan for today, Anon?", Twilight breakes the ice.
"To be honest, other than preparing for Saturday in any way we can, i don't really know."
>"C'mon, can't we just chill out a little? Just this once?" Rainbow pledges.
>"I don't think we can afford to waste the time, sugarcube. 'Sides, you do that plenty in Ponyville, dontcha' think?" AJ objects.
>"Hey! Just because you waste all your time working, it doesn't mean we have to!"
>"Now what's that supp-" and right about there you stopped listening.
>You look out the kitchen window and observe the floura outside.
>If it wasn't for the few bushes and trees in the yard, you're pretty sure the only vivid colors in you life would derive from pony plots on your computer screen.
>Just then a you were about to turn your attention back to the now raging conversation over the table, you spot something in the corner of your eye.
>Was that.. a flash?
>You bolt up from your seat over to the window.
>On the way, you grab an anchient pirate telescope from a cupboard, which you havn't had the heart to throw away.
>As you erect it and look thrugh the hole, you spot something behind the tree branches where you saw the flash.
>No.
>Nonono.
>Fuck!

>>27911577

>A fat fuck is sitting in it, and seems to be typing on his phone.
>Like a redneck with rodents in his backyard, your eyes pry for the closest throwable object.
>It happens to be Fluttershys' plate with sallad.
>"H-hey!" She jumps at your NKVD style confiscation of her plate.
>You throw the window open, and the autist realizes that he's spotted, and starts to hastiyl climb down, in what little speed his heavily overweight body could summon.
>For a few seconds you take aim, then you just let the plate fly, like something straight out of Area 51.
>It soars closer, and closer, untill..
>BOOM headshot!
>The lardass is stunned, and loses his grip, and like a 90s pinball he hits every branch on his tumbling way down.
>Wonder what hurt the most, the plate, or the green edibles that might lower his blood sugar with 1 ppm.
>He seems to be out cold, but after a few seconds slowly gets up, and naruto runs to a near by fatty scooter.
>Did he manage to send for reinforcments?
>No time to think.
>By now the girls are wondering why the fuck you threw fluttershy's food out the window.
>"What in Equestria are you doing, Anon!" Twilight yells.
"No time to explain! Get your shit, we're out of here!"
>"What-!"
"Now, Twilight!"
>The girls collects themselves A fast as they can.
>But it's too late.
>You can already hear Anime theme songs play in the stairs outside the door, and it's coming closer.
>"Anon! What's going on?!" Rainbow yells at you.
"Don't you get it? We've been fou-!"
>The chanting of the My Little Pony theme song cuts you off.
>Like the goblins of Moria, they try to tear down your front door.
>Katanas and various other Japanese weapons sticks through the emerging cracks and holes in your door.
>"T-those beasts.. They're here!" Rarity shrieks.
"Everyone, out the fire ladder!"
>The girls rush into the livingroom, and you fear what you might have to do.
>From the pantry, you whip out an old half full Vodka bottle.

>>27911583

>You take a rag from the plate rack, press it into the top of the bottle, before grabbing a lighter, and arm the improvised molotov.
>With a swift hand, you trow the bottle at the floor.
>At impact, a wall of heat draws over your face, as the flames spread throughout your kitchen.
>"WHAT ARE Y-!!"
"No time! the fire ladder, now!"
>You horde them into your bedroom, and one by one, they climb out the window.
>As fast as you can, the 9 of you advance down towards the ground.
>You jump down to the ground first, and help the rest down by catching them when they jump.
>Oddly enough, the alley seems clear.
>The flames soon start to blow out the window, grasping for air.
>"What ar-!" Twilight, starts, before you cut her off.
"RUN!"
>But it's no use.
>A dossen or so lords of sperges emerges by doing half assed tactical rolls out from behind dumpsters and other obstacles big enough to hide their 250+ pounds, and blocks the only exit.
>From their black leather trench coats, they unsheathes cheap katanas, mostly stained with orange Dorito dust.
>"I'm afraid i can't let you leave with m'ladies, Anon-kun"
"Eat shit, fuck face"
>"Now now, Anon-san. With my Authority as Dungeon Master, i can guarantee your leave without as much as a scratch, if you just hand over the girls. I swear by my Bushido. And European knights code which i also follow."
"Not gonna happen, autismo"
>He sighs, and clapps once with his fingerglove wearing hands.
>His henchmen stikes the offensive Samurai stance, and yells their war shriek
"NIPPON BANZAI!!"
>Just as they're about to rush you, a deafening thunder is heard from behind your back.
>You turn around and see.. Applejack?
>With a Magnum?

>>27911589

>She stole the fucking magnum?!
>"A-ahm not afraid to use this!" She says with a trembling voice. Sweat is flooding down her forehead.
>They're all frozen in shock
"Alright Applejack, just.. Just calm down.."
>You're afraid she'd out of a flinch shoot you in the chest, as you grab the .500
>"B-but you're my waifu! I-i've got you on 7 different dakimaku-!"
"Shut your fucking mouth! Back up! Back up!"
>You wave the gun in their faces, like Indiana Jones would wave a torch in the darkness.
>"Y-you can't keep them-"
>BANG
>You fire another shot, that breakes the currently speaking autists Katana in half.
"That's 10'000 turns for ya', faggot"
>Defeated, he crumbles over his broken Ebay ordered japanese steel, and cries like the man-baby he is over it.
>As they back up, you spot their vehicle. It's a..
>you guessed it.
>Prius.
>Normally you'd rather put on in your head than be seen driving one of those, but you don't really have the luxory of choice at this moment.
"Everyone, get in the fucking car!"
>Keys are luckily still in the ignition.
>Upon start up, the stereo automatically starts playing
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=XCiDuy4mrWU&feature=youtu.be&t=23
>As you start accelerating the automatic heresy for a vehicle, you see a horde of flesh coming around the corner of the house, waving weapons like a 1700s lynch mob.
>Blow darts fired through bamboo tubes hit the wind shields, but bounce off without leaving as much as a scratch.
>And with that, you dissapear like a salary on the 25th.

>"BAKA YAROU! All of you!"
>"Comenasai! H-he wielded a western weapon of plebianery!"
>"HETAKUSO!"
>The fat autist chief pulls out a Walkie Talki from Toys r' Us I used these for the heist and flips it open.
>"Initiate Air bourne units! They're heading down Anonsville St.!"
>"Rodger that, xXx_IWTCIRD_xXx"
>the roof of a van near by slowly opens, and out flies 4 quadrocopters.
>"You're not slipping through my fingers this time, Anon-Kun.."

>>27911601

>RD: "Did we lose them?!"
"I think so! But we've got to get this vehicle off the streets! They'll be looking for it!"
>There's chaos in the car. Either they're showering you with questions, are in a state of shock, or crying.
>Your situation gets more and more clear for every second, as your adrenaline levels slowly drop.
>FUCK
>Every FUCKING thing you owned is now ashes!
>At least you got the mon-
>FUUUCK!
>It's still in your car on the parking lot.
>Did they see you arrive in it?
>At this point, you can't tell.
>All you know, is that you're not only hunted by enough fat to light every home in Africa for 7 years, and you're counting on that the cops want to have a word or two with you as well.
>Not only that, you have to find some new place to stay. Again.
>You dare not try to check in on the fancy Hotel again, not after the show you put on the other day.
>The outlines of a checklist is starting to form in your head:
1. Get car off road
2. Get new place to stay
3. Get new transportation
4. Find out what they know about you, the girls, and your situation
>Of the four, the last one will likely proove most difficult.
>Think, where teh heck does their kind gather to quickly share intelligence?
>...
>Right. Of fucking course.
>How the fuck did you not think of this earlier?

>>27911601

>The hugbox, the kindergarden of the fandom.
>Ponychan
>/mlp/ would probably discard whoever claimed to have found the mane 6 as a baiter/shitposter.
>And probably called him a raging faggot as well.
>And probably whined about >No hooves
>And probably fap to whatever potential pictures there is of them.
>Good cosplay pics is hard to come by.
>You would know.
>"Uuh Anon?" Rainbow Dash interrupts.
"Please, Can it wait?"
>She pauses and looks out the window for a second, then picks up again
>"Uh, I don't know. But that strange looking bird is following us"
>Strange looking bird?
>You look out the roof window (Every Prius' got them)
>That's no bird
>That's a space statio- a fucking drone!

File: 322451.jpg (48KB, 700x525px) Image search: [Google]

48KB, 700x525px

Hope we're alive in the morning

>>27911565
Been busy with that co-op that I mentioned previously, mostly. It's been fun, but I can't say that I enjoy having little shards of steel in the skin of my arms and hands that poke me if I apply enough pressure, nor having to remove them.
Anyways, time to get reading

File: 1468712026907.png (320KB, 666x538px) Image search: [Google]

320KB, 666x538px

Bump

Fucken finally
Bump

File: revy_from_black_lagoon_by_daikkenaurora-d6krqeo.jpg (259KB, 1024x1303px) Image search: [Google]

259KB, 1024x1303px

So, where Dapper at?

>>27911551
YOU FORGOT THE SEQUEL LINK AGAIN!

File: 1468551234458.jpg (39KB, 350x447px) Image search: [Google]

39KB, 350x447px

>>27914533
Nah man, i actually did remember it this timeLiking it too btw. The thing is the OP became too long, and i was going to have it shortened/re-written to fit the link, but the clock was like 2 AM, and i started my 12 hour shift (which i'm on right now) at 5, so I figured i had to call it a day, if i didn't want to fall asleep 2 feet from a ~5 foot deep pool of molten aluminium.
Next week, brochacho. Fo' real this time.

>>27914916
REEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE

Its cool dood <3

File: 1468744776101.png (1MB, 1014x1300px) Image search: [Google]

1MB, 1014x1300px

Bump

>>27911623
do you have a pastebin of what you have written since the end of day six?

>>27915994
that's not how laptops work

>>27913858
Who hath summoned me?
Seriously though I've been painting my house and had to move my computer around, still not finished so maybe I can do something tomorrow or later tonight if I set it up on the floor.
Jasse you bastard, you beat me to the punch.

File: 1468677586431.png (516KB, 1000x1414px) Image search: [Google]

516KB, 1000x1414px

>>27916723
Oh shit, I've been putting it off, haven't i?

>>27918536
>I've been painting my house
I'm emptying mine atm. Gotta be clear by the 15th next month. Feels like shit man
Plus1.0 i'll be moving to my new apartment next month as well. Plus2.0, if everything goes smoothly, i'll be going to North Korea. If they execute me, know my dying wish is for Eq.I to be finished

>Jasse you bastard, you beat me to the punch.
Breh, What punch?

>>27919215
I was going to have a fire in my story too.
Also a shootout as you might have guessed by now, but Sage also beat me to it last year.
Damn y'all niggas for being in top of your game.
And what's up with north Korea you got a death wish or something?

File: 1430717487254.jpg (163KB, 660x1143px) Image search: [Google]

163KB, 660x1143px

Bamp

File: 2.png (190KB, 696x516px) Image search: [Google]

190KB, 696x516px

>>27919974
>you got a death wish or something?
It would be one hell of a way to go at least
Nah but seriously, i have traveled very little in my days (and i'm fine with that hbtq). But i figured i should go somewhere memorable while i'm young, y'know? Something to tell my kids when i'm an old fart.
I chose N. Korea basically because i don't want to go to some normie travel destination, like Thailand. I'm pretty /pol/itically interseted, and N.Korea is the last place where you can observe a totalitarian /Communistic/ state in it's prime (Don't get me wrong, i'm no fan of communism, though the 'atmosphere' surrounding it is very intriguing to me).

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9RhMH0fzClg

>>27919974
Where is Sage anyway?

>>27920377
THAT BASTARD LEFT US TO ROT !!!
Nah but he is in medical school so pretty sure that's taking up his time

>>27920636
Still, doesn't he even lurk any more?

File: 1467397717695.png (377KB, 724x1024px) Image search: [Google]

377KB, 724x1024px

>>27924206
Doesn't seem like it. But he'll be back.
They always come back.

File: 20160717_180004.jpg (2MB, 3264x2448px) Image search: [Google]

2MB, 3264x2448px

Damn it's chilly in here.

When are you updating, Dapper?

Post battlestation and/or workstation

Bamp

dwnq

File: 1461162455359.png (35KB, 315x320px) Image search: [Google]

35KB, 315x320px

>>27924601
Don't tease my dick like that