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Reversed Gender Roles Equestria

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Previous thread: >>27864663

GoogleDoc Pastebin Archive:
https://docs.google.com/document/d/1aoh8YH3I0q78czAnb9mt_4h5jUeCUbivFV5WhAh935U/edit?pli=1

Old CrazyRain's Stories' Archives:
http://pastebin.com/C82B4dea
>>
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first for PREGNANCIES GALORE
>>
>>27889464
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vzrYgDnewSI&list=RDvzrYgDnewSI&index=1
>anon was a soldier on earth
>was never deployed but was trained to be a paratrooper
>he sings "blood apon the risers" in public on his way to work
>pones think he wants to die
>something rgre happens

goodnight you autistic fucks.
>>
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Ponies ask if something's wrong with your nose. You should be able to smell the heat.
>>
>>27889603
>what wrong with your nose anon? can't you smell the estrus?
>"a human nose is for finding females to rape not to find out if they are willing or not" you say for the millionth time today
>"oh...wanna rape me?!" twilight asks desperately
>"no" you say yet again


>you are twilight
>and you suffer another day without the HMD
>>
>>27889731
forgive me its my first time writing since high school.
>>
>>27889513
Rainbow was the herd's first. They went and celebrated with sour drinks like mares do. Everyone was surprised when Anon, the herd's stallion, could easily stomach the drinks.
>>
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>>27889763
>Rainbow was the herd's first.
>fastest pregnancy
thats kinda cute in a way
>>
>>27889747
I 4giv u
>>
>>27889942
ye
>>
>>27889763
> You will never start a herd with Dash
> You will never hear how her friends are jealous for being the first one to settle
> You will never be surprised to find out that she can, indeed, get pregnant from your nights of passionate love making.
> You will never have dash ask you to invite her friends to the herd
> You will never watch all of the girls cry tears of joy when you and dash propose
>>
>>27889970
Ys
>>
>sour drinks
>crayon disguises
>pone prison
>playground telefuckies

Wake me up when the pedos in denial leave.
>>
>>27890250
>Hates fun
You won't be missed
>>
>>27890250
Oh it's you again.
>>
>>27889464
>>27889464
> Stories about Venus and Noctis
> Anon, Luna, Venus and Aunt Celestia recount stories to Noctis' marefriend about his chuuni edgy phase.
> Like that time he unleashed NM to reclaim his "BIRTHRIGHT".
>Instead of darkness, eternal night and subjugation of the masses, NM cried unmarely tears of joy and coddled the fallen prince in front of everyone.
> "Look Queen Mother! Lord Father Anonymous and my Eternal Nemesis Venus just left to buy stuff at Baltimare! It's the perfect time to strike! Let us smite the Solar Diarch and the Element of Magic."
>"M-mother what are you doing"
"Yes my dear Prince, Tis' the perfect moment but hold still, my Noctanium reserves have been depleted and mommy needs to charge. Now, who's my good little prince~"
>"N-no I am the Abyss!"
>>
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Shell when?
And looks like it's time to try into edgenight Nocti-Nocti prince design. If that anon who did first Venus arts was around here...

>>27890384
Not enough edge for The Abuss, he could summon Nyx
>>
>>27890527
I leave his design up to you, pencil fag.
>>
>>27890384
Noctis's rebellious phase is like those "scene girls" you saw in high school with the really poofy neon-coloured hair.
>>
>"Twilight... Pinkie, could you both... be dears and... come closer? The three of us... have a VERY... naughty stallion... to see to..."
>Each word was a struggle
>You could hear it in Rarity's voice as she did...
>The horn...
>Anon's neck...
>...
>Be Twilight Sparkle
>You were uncomfortable; as uncomfortable as you've ever been in your entire life
>Though you were pretty sure that you had said something like that already today THIS was the true discomfort
>Every single breath you took you could smell... RARITY
>Her sweat, that fancy perfume that she always wore, her... her...
>Her... JUICES...
>You could hear her panting, you could hear her rump wetly rubbing against Anonymous's legs as she grinded herself against his lap
>You could hear Pinkie, who was still sitting in front of both Rarity and Anon, whining quietly under her breath
>You could also hear your ragged breathing as well
>Other than that everything was quiet
>Nopony was making jokes, nopony had anything smart to say
>There was absolutely no teasing, no joking around, no trying to make light of the situation
>Anonymous had basically held down Rarity and sucked on her horn
>... Not basically; he HAD held Rarity down and sucked her horn
>No if's, and's, or but's
>And not only had he sucked on her horn-- something that stallions only did in your doujins-- he had swallowed the thing in its entirety
>Now, Anon was a BIG stallion, sure, but Rarity's horn was a pretty good size
>N-No Homo
>You were SURE that even with somepony as big as Anon that taking ALL of it would have meant that he had to deepthroat the thing
>...
>And not only had to taken it, with ALL of you watching, but you had been able to see him swallowing again and again as he did it
>...
>You could hear a commotion going on a few feet from you
>It sounded like Anon's little... stunt had managed to get some stallions out of his gym
>>
>>27891139
>How many you had no idea
>You couldn't bring yourself to turn your head the few inches to look
>You were looking at the thin sheen of sweat on Rarity
>You were looking at her frazzled mane
>You were looking at the smile on her face, and the hunger in her eyes, as she lovingly rubbed the tip of her horn against Anon's exposed throat
>The human didn't know what the gesture meant; you were almost positive that he didn't
>But you did; oh sweet Celestia above you did
>And because you knew what it meant you should have started yelling at your friend, yank her off Anon, possibly even battle for his honor
>A mare didn't DO something like that to a stallion
>Especially a stallion that had no bucking idea what it meant
>You opened your mouth to say something, to yell, to make demands, to protect Anon's honor like the gentlemare that you were...
>But no sound came
>Your nostrils flared, taking in your friend's musk
>The fashionista was still grinding herself into Anonymous's lap, trying to coax the stallion into hardness
>She was licking her lips, staring back at you with hazy, half-lidded eyes
>When did she...
>"Twilight, dear," Rarity cooed. "If you were to stare at the two of us any harder you might set both Anonymous and I ABLAZE."
>You jumped, the blush on your face deepening so much that you felt lightheaded
"S-Sorry," you mumbled, finally tearing your gaze away from the two. "I w-was just, I mean you were, I was--"
>You sunk into yourself as Rarity let out an airy, amused giggle
>"Anonymous? Twilight looks terribly uncomfortable. Might you be a dear and see to it that she is calmed?"
>Your eyes widened as Rarity, giving Anonymous's cheek a tender nuzzle, climbed off the human's lap and the couch so that she was standing next to Pinkie
>That just left you and Anon, who was as nude as you've ever seen him and SOAKED with Rarity's cum, sitting on Roseluck's couch
>...
>A couch that you were probably going to have to replace...
>You didn't want--
>>
>>27891139
>Literally finish having a cold shower
>Come back to this
Fuck
>>
>>27889464
Does anyone know who's that alicorn OC on the OP pic please?
>>
>>27891144
>...Wait
>What did she mean?
>What was Anon going to--
"Eep!"
>Your wings began to flap as Anon leaned over and reached out for you
>You tried to get away from those big arms of his but the couch was too small and his arms were too long
"Anon! You don't, I can't, you don't need to--"
>Without letting you finish, Anon managed to get ahold of you, picking you up in the air and lifting you over to him
"Anon! Put me down right--"
>"Shush."
"B-But--!"
>"Shush."
>There was a look of confusion on his face as he sat you down in his lap
>Not shock, not lust, not indignation, just confusion, as if he didn't know what to make of what was going on
>...
>Did...
>Did he not know what he just did?
>Was...
>Was Anon a virgin?
>YOU were a virgin, but that didn't mean you didn't know what horn sucking was about
>It didn't take a dummy to figure out that it was an intimate and sexual act
>...
>Did Anon even know about sex?
>...
>Oh sweet Luna... he didn't, did he?
>He was as pure as the driven snow and Rarity, and by extension Pinkie and you, had corrupted him like the ne'er-do-well's that you--
>"Twilight."
>Your eyes darted up to Anon's face
>His mouth was set in a thin line and his brow was furrowed
>You wiggled back and forth in his lap, your heart skipping a beat when you realized that you were sitting in Rarity's... excitement
"Y-Yes, Anon?" you asked, a little too loudly, fidgeting with your hooves
>Anon looked over your shoulder at Rarity, who was whispering something in Pinkie's ear with a mischievous glint in her eyes
>He stared at her for a few moments, his eyes narrowing, before he looked back at you
>>
>>27891158
>He was quiet for a few moments, milling over his thoughts, before he opened his mouth
>"Did I just molest Rara?" he asked
>Twilight.exe has stopped working
"U-Um, I, w-well, I don't think that you, um, you see," you shimmered
>Your mind raced, trying to think up an answer to his... difficult question
>He HAD pulled Rarity into his lap against her will
>But she could have gotten out of his grasp with her magic at any time you were sure
>He had also just started licking and s-sucking her horn without permission
>But who the buck was going to say no to something like that?
>If the dirtiest, smelliest, ugliest stallion in the world offered to suck your horn you wouldn't even have to think about it
>...
>Could stallions even rape mares?
>If Rarity wanted to, hypothetically, take Anon to court for rape would the jury even believe her?
>You were sitting there WATCHING and you could barely believe it!
"I... I think so, Anon."
>The human's face scrunched up as he leaned back against the sofa
>Your ears perked up as the couch's wooden frame strained to hold itself together under his mass, groaning loudly
>"I fucking knew it," he grumbled, not sounding very happy. "That's the last time I listen to Lyra when--HEY!"
>You yelped as Anon, his eyes wide, picked you up and lifted you over his head
>"The fuck's going on down there?!"
"SFvkdjfbdkfjbd!"
>Hooves kicking frantically in the open air, you looked over your shoulder
>Pinkie and Rarity were sitting at the foot of the sofa
>Rarity's magic had forced the human's legs open
>What?
>What were they...
>Your eyes widened when you saw Rarity lean down and nuzzle Anon's inner thigh while Pinkie, wetting her lips, leaned forward and--
"Pinkie! Rarity! What the buck do you think you're doing?!"
>Anon twitched as Pinkie's tongue lolled out of her mouth and licked the tip of his cock, the only part of his stallionhood that wasn't covered by that sleeve of his
>You still had no idea how he managed to fit into that thing
>>
>>27891162
>You could hear the fabric screaming in protest each time he moved
>It was so tight, in fact that he--
>skdfjbvdkjfbvdkjbk!
>Your eyes bugged out of your head as his grip on you tightened significantly
>OhsweetCelestiahe'sgoingtosqueezeyoutodeath!
>"Yeah," Anon cried, not realizing that he was now KILLING you. "What the FUCK are you two doing down there?!"
"Urgh... Anon."
>"Do you always go around licking shit you're not supposed to, Pank?!"
"A... Anon..."
>"You don't know where that's been!"
"A... Ano..."
>"For all you know that--"
>Black teasing the edges of your vision, you did the only thing that you could do
>Rearing back one of your back legs, you swung it as hard as you could toward Anon's face, connecting solidly with his chin
"Glu.. ur..."
>Owowowowowowowowowowo!
>Just like when you had slapped his rump, it felt like you were hitting a block of stone
>But instead of slapping it you had kicked it as hard as you could
>You squirmed in pain, your vision darkening, but, as luck would have it, your little stunt had garnered Anon's attention
>Immediately, his grip on you lessened, allowing you to take a deep, deep breath
"Haaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh!"
>"Goddammit, Twilight!" Anon snapped, setting you back down in his lap where you promptly slumped against him. "Why didn't you say something?!"
"You... were... squeezing... too... hard..." you answered, savoring the feeling of the various gases in the air filling you up
>You're one hell of a sis, oxygen
>And you're muh zigger nitrogen
>Even you, Argon, you're my zigger till the end
>You let out a quiet groan as Anon began to gently, apologetically rub your lower back
>"Are you alright there, Twi?" he asked, concern in his eyes as he stared down at you
>Though your chest was still heaving, you forced yourself to nod
"Yeah... just... give me... a few... seconds... and I'll... be alright," you said, resting your chin on his shoulder and closing your eyes
>>
>>27891191
>Bucking Rarity...
>Bucking Pinkie...
>What the BUCK were those two doing?!
>You continued to breath deeply, focusing on the feeling of Anon's fingers running through your fur
>It felt... nice
>Even though you were sitting in Rarity's cum and Pinkie had just licked Anon's dingaling and Rarity was doing Celestia knows what it felt nice
>You could, just this once, let Anon deal with Rarity and Pinkie
>He'd chew them out, they'd say they were sorry, and you'd get your pets
>Everypony would--
>Ohmygosh!
>"Don't you give me that look, Rara," Anon growled as your eyes snapped open. "What the hell are you telling Pinkie to go and lick my dick for?"
>You felt Anon's hand, the hand that was scratching your back, rise a few inches, then a few inches more
>"Pinkie and I just thought that you'd appreciate it if we returned the favor of you lavishing us so thoroughly, dear."
>Anon's hand jumped a few more inches on your back until you could feel his fingertips tickling your flight muscles
>Your eyes widened even further as you went stiff in Anon's lap
>Gasping, you wiggled a bit, your wings half-opening before you forced them to shut
>Y-You had to say something
>He didn't know!--
>You wings!--
"Anon, you could reall--eep!"
>"I don't need anyone to LAVISH me," Anon insisted, digging his fingers into the muscle right under your wing joint. "I was just rubbing Pinkie's stomach--"
>"Tummy."
>"--STOMACH, and..."
>Your back arched as you heard a puff of air leave Anon as he went silent for a few moments
>"... Well, shit... Rarity, I'm sorry for kind of--"
>"There's nothing to be sorry about, darling," Rarity insisted
>Your wings flapped again as Anon began to absentmindedly knead the--
>rtgoiernldkfndlknl!
>Your eyes crossed, and for a few seconds you forgot how to breath
"A-Ano--"
>>
>>27891223
>Anon's other hand joined its brother, scratching you under your left wing pit
>Despite your best efforts, your wings extended slightly as you twitched again
>"Yeah, there is," Anon retorted. "I should have asked before, well... sucking on it like I did."
>"Will it make you feel any better if I told you that what you did felt WONDERFUL?" Rarity asked, her head cocked to the side
>If you would have turned your head, you would have noticed that there was a smile on her face
>A happy, pleased smile; the kind of smile that one forgiving friend gave another
>But you didn't see it, because, at that moment, Anonymous was tracing a finger up and down the middle of your back, right between your wings
"H-Hah~"
>Your legs slapped against Anon's stomach as you tried to close them
>You were breathing hard now and it was getting difficult to form thoughts
>Anon shrugged as you whimpered quietly, curling into yourself as another burst of pleasure made your head swim
>"It really doesn't make me feel all that much better, Rara," the human admitted as you buried your face into his neck.
>"Remember that we're supposed to put on a show for those stallions, Anonymous. And besides, I do remember telling you that you could do what you will with me."
>Your nostrils flared as you nuzzled Anon's collar bone
>You could smell his sweat, along with Rarity's musk, but you could also smell something else
>Though you had thought it impossible-- you must have been about as red as big Mac at this point-- your face became even redder when you realized what you were smelling was YOUR excitement
"A-An... A-Anon... d-do--"
>His hands were roaming all along your back now
>Every single one of your sensitive flight muscles were touched, kneaded, rubbed, and even pinched without a second thought
>"There's doing whatever you want and then there's doing whatever you want, Rare."
>>
>>27891247
>"Anonymous, dear, if you think I am upset that a stallion like as yourself had your way with me you are very much mistaken."
>"It's still shitty."
>You bit back a groan as Rarity sighed loudly
>"If you are truly so put out by your own behavior then might you allow me a boon?"
>Your whole body shifted as Anon sighed
>For a second, you felt his hands leave your back, making you sigh in relief
>Oh thank Celestia...
>A little more of THAT and you might have made a mess...
>Taking a few deep breaths, you did your best to rub your back legs together to relieve some of the heat
>As long as Anonymous kept his grabbers away from your wings and back you'd be fine
>You'd be fine...
>Just breath...
>In...
>Out...
>In...
>Out...
>There's no dirty thoughts here...
>You're a gentlemare
>The gentlest gentlemare that's ever gentled
>...
>Sweet Celestia were you sweaty...
>The sounds of the couch groaning could be heard over your ragged breathing as Anon leaned back a bit more
>"A boon? What the hell do you want, Rara?" Anon asked, curiously
>Though you didn't see it, your face still buried in Anon's neck as you tried to remember how to pone, Rarity leaned down toward Anon's lap
>The fashionista's nostrils flared as her muzzle hovered over his stallionhood
>She hummed, looking up and winking at the human before dipping down and placing a loving kiss on the tip of his member
>Luckily for you, Anon didn't try to squeeze you do death this time
>He simply grunted in surprise, looking down at the white unicorn with scrunched up nose
>"If you truly wish to make it up to me than I must insist that you lie back and let Pinkie and I have our way with you as you've had your way with us."
>Her gaze snapped to your sweaty, slightly shaking form
>"And if you'd be a dear and see to Twilight as well I'd very much appreciate. Though seeing the state that you have her in now..."
>>
>>27891269
>Frowning, Anon looked down at you
>"...Twilight? You alright there?"
>Not trusting your voice, you simply nodded and hoped that your answer would be sufficient
>It, of course, wasn't
>"Twiggles... what's going on with your wings? And why are you so sweaty? Twilight, look at me."
>When you felt his hands on your withers you pressed yourself against him further, trying your hardest to collect yourself
>You flapped your overly sensitive wings, tried to calm your breathing, tried to wipe the drool from your face
>You could do it
>You could--
>"The muscles on the back of a Pegasus are sensitive, Anon dear," Rarity said, her blue eyes dancing as she rested her head on Anon's leg. "Sensitive enough that if somepony, say a stallion like yourself, were to TOUCH such muscles for an extended amount of time it would be VERY pleasureable."
>Anon stopped trying to push you back to get a better look at you
>You could feel his gaze on you
>...
>BUCK
>Rarity chuckled again as she nuzzled Anon's leg
>"While Twilight is an alicorn, not a pegasus, I am positive that the same thing applies to her, darling."
>Anon looked down at Rarity, then at Pinkie, who's mouth was watering as she eyed Anon's stallionhood, then back down at you
>Mentally cursing Rarity, the bucking tattle-tale, you forced yourself to look up at Anon
"A-Anon it's really not as--"
>"Did I just fucking molest you too?" Anon asked with exasperation, making a face. "God-fucking-dammit."
"You didn't know, Anon," you blurted you. "It's really my fault that I didn't say anything while you were--"
>"I know every fucking joint in a pony's body but I don't know what happens when you poke at their backs and play with their horns?" Anon muttered to himself, covering his face with a hand as he shook his head. "Motherfucking, shit, shit, cunt, fuck..."
>Oh no!
>>
>>27891285
>Because you had sat on your big bucking flank Anon had a sad now!
>You didn't want to give him a sad!
>You had to do something!
>You had to make Anon feel better!
>But what could you do?
>Think!
>THINK FILLY!
>Your wings, still half-erect, gave a little flap as you frantically looked around
>ThinkofsomethingthinkofsomethingsomethingofsomethingthinkofsomethingCelestiadammit!
>Your eyes snapped back to Anon as he sighed
>"Twilight, Anon's being such a silly man. Be a dear and calm him down will you?" Rarity called
>What the buck does she think you're trying to do?!
>"Come on Twilight, you can do it!" Pinkie said with a little hop. "Perk him right up!"
>But how though?!
>How the buck were you going to--
>Your ears perked up as the sound of a spell being cast came to your ears
>Magic?
>Who was using magi--
>An invisible force grabbed the back of your head
>At the same time as it did that you saw a blue aura encasing Anon's hand
"...Wha--"
>Before you could finish your thought you were pushed forward
>As that happened Anon's hand was pulled away from his face
>Your wings flapped again as your lips came crashing against Anon's
>Somehow, by the grace of Celestia, neither of you had banged your noses or teeth or anything like that together
>Your kiss had been perfect, almost like your lips were made for each--
>...
>YouwerebuckingkissingAnonymous!
>Your eyes widened as you mewled into Anon's mouth, your back legs twitching
>Anon, who looked confused once again stared back at you
>The two of you just stared at each other for a few moments, both of you shocked
>...
>>
>>27891302
>Anon's lips were really soft...
>"There we go," Rarity cooed with smile. "Isn't this better than all of that fussing?"
>"RAPE! RAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPEEEEEEEEE!"
>"THEY'RE FORCING THEMSELVES ON THAT STALLION! THEY'RE FORCING THEMSELVES ON HIM!"
>"SOMEPONY DO SOMETHING! THEY'RE OVERPOWERING ANON! THEY'RE GOING TO RAPE HIM!"
>WHAT?!
>NO YOU WEREN'T!
>YOU WERE A GOOD PONY!
>YOU WERE!
>YES YOU WERE!
>With a yelp, you broke the kiss
>As you did that you jerked backward, your wings frantically flapping as you lost your balance
>If it wasn't for Anon, who was quick to grab you, you would have definitely fallen out of his lap like the biggest putz in the world
>"Easy there, Twilight," he said, guiding you back against his chest
>You were breathing hard, absolutely FURIOUS about what Rarity had just done, and your wings were now fully erect once more
>But you didn't resist Anon, simply resting your chin on his shoulder as you tried to catch your breath
>...
>You were going to get out of Anon's lap after you had calmed down and you were going to punch Rarity
>You were going to sock her in the snozzle harder than you had ever socked anything in your life
>That mare was cruisin' for a bruisin', and you were sure as a honey seed going to give her that bruising
>Swear on me mum'
>"Now it appears that you owe a "debt" to two mares, my dear human," Rarity sing-songed, looking up at him with those blue eyes of hers
>Anon was looking down at her, eyes narrowed slightly
>He then looked over at his gym
>To his surprise, dozens upon dozens of stallions were STILL being dragged away from the gym, kicking and screaming and bound in chains
>>
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>>27891314
>"Twilight?"
>Your ears perked up but you kept your head on his shoulder
>"Did what I was doing to your back feel good?" he asked quietly as Pinkie leaned over and rested her head on his other thigh
>Both her and Rarity were smiling up at Anon, licking their lips like a couple of hungry wolves
>But you couldn't see that
>You were just staring ahead
>Still breathing in Anon's scent
"Y-Yeah," you muttered. "It f-felt good..."
>You could almost hear the gears churning in Anon's head as he went silent once more
>His hands were lightly touching your sides, right under your forelegs
>You could feel his fingers drumming against your ribs
>"Huh..."
>Suddenly, his hands began to wander toward your back
>"Would you, hypothetically, be alright with me... poking at your back some more?"
>Your eyes widened as Rarity and Pinkie's grins began absolutely wolfish
>This couldn't be real
>It was a dream
>You were dreaming
>Stallions didn't ask mares to do something like that
>And they especially didn't do something like that out in the open
>...
>It wasn't right
>If other ponies found it they'd call Anon a slut behind his back for YEARS
>You couldn't do something like that to Anon
>You had to say no
>You had to look him in the eye and tell him no!
"W-Well, if you want to..." you shyly muttered. "I m-mean, if you're c-comfortable with it an--epp!"
>You twitched as Anon traced one of the muscles around your right wing
>As he did that, Pinkie gave his leg a lick, cooing to herself
>Anon looked at all of you
>There was a bit of hesitation in his eyes but there was also steely resolve
>And rage
>Lots and lots of rage
>"Fuck it. Let's do it ladies," he said, giving your back a squeeze
>You whimpered, your hips bucking at the stimulation
>"Let's crank this shit up to eleven."
>>
>>27891338
Alright, I'm done
>>
>>27891338
That's Twilight Velvet.
>>
>>27891338
>>"Let's crank this shit up to eleven."
And then they all fucked.
>>27891344
You da bess LaP. Loving this so far.
>>
>>27891344
I await the violent hatefucking of Lyra for lying to Anon.
>>
>>27891344
When everything is over, will he use the new techniques he's learned to reduce Celestia to a whimpering mess? I think it could really do wonders for the story.
>>
>>27891157
Celestia?
>>
>>27891338
Is good.
Eagerly awaiting the "No-stallions" gym policy change.
Mare only implies other species aren't allowed
We can't leave those minos and roos out, they add a lot of character.

>>27891416
You have to fuck ALL the princesses.

>>27891377
Bonbon and Anon will have extensive lyra-free lewds.
And not let her watch, either.
She's gonna have the bluest of beans.
Bonny belly rubs

>>27891352
>Twilight Velvet is in town to visit Twilight Sparkle.
>Is "requisitioned" by Anon to help get these asshole stallions out of his gym.
>Night Light is an old-school stallionist and is just as disgusted as Anon by these upstarts.
>>27891500
I think he's talking about Ceiling Pony.
She's an OC with some ridiculously long name who everyone just calls "Cadence".
>Has the typical autistic OC extravagant backstory and is princess of some glass pony kingdom, while being the babysitter of one of the mane 6 and also their brother's husband.
>Really the most important thing to know about her is that Ceiling pony is watching you masturbate.
>>
>>27891533
...We now need Cadence as a voyeur stalking Anon, her "one true love".
>>
Out of curiosity and a lack of ideas, what would people be interested in seeing out of my next story?
>>
>>27890384
>>27890867
Now, do you really think that any father (human), let alone, Anon, would let that to happend?
He will grab his colt to be a man, much to the discomfort of any ruler.
I see to his son, Luna will give Noctis cute things, like dolls or kid's make-up, but then Anon will give tools or toys for fillies to Noctis.
Noctis will be a man, even if he is a pony.
Take away them frilly dresses, give him a suit and a tie, that's what mans wear.
>>
>>27891533
>"I fought for your right to vote and this is how you repay me? By capturing a fellow stallion's gym, destroying his property, and bellowing like a dying boar?"
>The stallions put up a token effort, half-heartedly calling Velvet a rapist, but their cries of "toxic maresculinity" do not sway her no matter how many times they call her a bigot.
>>
>>27891883
My Little Human
>>
>>27891883
Timberwolf lovin
>>
>>27892084
Think that was already covered by http://pastebin.com/zhz0qgLM
>>
>>27891764
>Be Cadence, a pony.
>You and your best bro Shiny want some alien lovin.
>Dem ayys mang.
>You're on the way to Canterlot, where the alien is.
>Also you'll probably pop in and say hi to loony and lesty afterwards
>When you approach the base of Mt. Canterlot you see it.
>The alien architecture sends shivers down your spine, clearly designed by an unequine mind.
>Aww yea, this is the real deal
>Not like that time Twilight told you she found an alien and it turned out to just be a minotaur some horrible brute shaved and dumped in Ponyville.
>That was a real let down.
>The road doesn't actually lead to where you're going, so you pull the cart over as close as you can to the bizzare structure.
>Shiny sets up the camera with the long-distance lens so you can both get a good look at the alien while you have a picnic lunch by the road
>You both want to be at your best for this.
>Neither of you wants to risk blowing your chance at some alien lovin.

>>27891883
Ayys doing ayy things.
I heard humans can spit acid and can break through the strongest shield spell as if it was cardboard!
>>
>>27892084
On an odd note, a friend asked me for help on the finer points of sex wih plants.
>>27892029
My big Human, Technology is amazing.
>>27892132
Anon arrives in RGRE and MBH is a thing. Ponies constantly want him to do alien things.
>>
>>27891883
Anon is chosen as a neutral mediator for peace discussions between Celestia and Chrysalis. While spending this time with him, both mares find they rather like the alien stallion and attempt to woo him, further slowing the peace talks.

Eventually the three of them become a herd to unify equines and changelings and ensure both rulers get the HMD.
>>
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>>27891883
Pick up an unpopular theme that usually gets shouted down by our less fortunate anons and use your fame and skill to push through something adequate.
>>
>>27892123
And I loved every second of it. It may just be because I lost my dog to old age recently. I miss the lil guy.
>>
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>>27890384
>Noctis
>>
I kinda want to see a superman anon living in a world of cardboard equestria, except rgre.
And he tries his best to hide his monsterous strength and durability while interacting with various conflicts.

But that's just me being autistic.
>>
>>27892264
i.e. teletubbies - edgy version.
>>
>>27892264
>Be Supanon
>Oh look, it's Chrysalis
>"Now, I am the true ruler of Equestria"
>Silly bug horse
>You flick her nose
>"What are you doing masked colt?"
>You flick her nose again
>"Stop that!"
>She hurls a bolt of magic at you but it fizzles upon contact.
>You flick her nose again
>Cease your tomfoolery!
>You flick her nose

And Supanon just keeps doing that until she surrenders and goes back home.
Best buds with discord
>>
>>27891344
Please put the next part out soon.
>>
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>>27891338
And then it ended in one big happy herd.
>>
>>27887879
The story was a little heavy handed and in places silly (ie. Anon, spouse of the god queen serving at some sprts bar) but thanks for finishing it shuk!
>>
>>27888106
>>tfw homeless horse died
This makes me the saddest.
>>
>>27892560
Threads die because you aren't writefagging enough.
If there's a premise you want to see more of, go write some stuff about it and post it in the relevant threads.
If you write it, they will come.
>>
>>27892599
>>27892560
I'm saying write us a story about that thing.
Go on, resurrect your waifu.
>>
>>27892482
Well, he worked that job for nearly ten years before he married Moonhorse, so I doubt she's gonna take that from him.
>>
>>27892298
maybe if you were an edgelord
>>
>>27892615
>Be Luna, Princess of getting dickings.
>Meet husbando.
>Is not such a pansy like all the other stallions around these days.
>Didn't have a kitchen to go back to, so went and got himself hired as a chef.
>Now he can make all the sandwiches.
>You like his initiative.
>It also helps that those wigglers of his feel really really nice.
>You just wish you could get him to stop taking your Luna Craters breakfast cereal away from you
>They are not only for consumption by children!
>Grown mares need a delicious and nutritious breakfast meal too!
>Anonymous has denied you your favorite breakfast for too long.
>He may be the stallion and lord of his kitchen, but this is just cruel.
"Silly Luna, Craters are for Children."
>>
>>27892685
>craters are for children
why does this sound so lewd?
>>
>>27892181
>Anon arrives in Equestria
>MLH:TiM exists here
>Anon is a background character who still doesn't have any dialogue
>Still has a small cult following
>Anon's interactions with ponies start with excited mares and ends with disappointment when Anon destroys their headcanons
>Ironically, Lyra hates the show and thinks the mares who watch it are "sunhat-tipping tuftbeards"
>>
>>27892196
Seconding this.
>>
Continuing from last thread: http://pastebin.com/m3290Td5

---
>This was the life, let me tell you.
>”More please.”
>Lifting a spoonful of delicious chocolate pudding from the bowl settled in your other hand you brought it to Celestia’s lips.
“Say ahhhh.”
>Opening her mouth she greedily engulfed the entire spoonful and hmm’d in delight.
>”Ithss sho good.”
“Don’t talk with your mouth full, I thought princess were taught etiquette.”
>Celestia’s response was to stick her now pudding covered tongue at you.
>Settled comfortably on the overly sized bed you were content stuffing yourself and Celestia full of the delicious treat.
>The occasional teasing going on between spoonfuls of the sugary delight.
>After making the decision earlier to eat in your room and away from the guests Celestia decided that you shouldn’t be alone either.
>This resulted in the very fluffy pony princess laying across your lap, sharing a dessert.
”Do you think Luna will be alright by herself?”
>No matter how nice it was to spend time with Celestia again, you were worried about the other member of your relationship.
>”I think so, she’s not as naïve as ponies believe her to be.”
“Not exactly what I meant, I was more worried about the visitors she’s probably dealing with at the moment.”
>While you weren’t concerned about her being overpowered or something like that, but you were still worried about what those girls could do.
>If they couldn’t get to you, they would try the next best thing.
>”I know what you meant Anon, but trust my sister, she can take care of herself.”
>Setting the bowl and spoon on the tray table just off to side, you pulled the big snuggly pony into a big hug before settling down on the bed.
“I trust her and you, but that doesn’t mean I’m just going to pretend that everything is all honkey dorey.”
>Feeling Celestia nuzzle the side of your face you relaxed.
>”Let’s get some rest, no more bad thoughts today.”
>>
>>27893146
OH SHIT
>>
>>27893146
>Luna’s hard gaze lingered on both you and Gilda.
>”So despite the current trade agreements you want to request more guards to accompany the shipments?”
>Gilda, despite what you heard of her brash attitude was definitely acting like a diplomat.
>”Yes, while we only sometimes see raiders attack caravans, the possibility still exists.”
>Where was Anon?
>From the moment you arrived he was nowhere to be found, you asked the guards and maids, but none had seen the human.
>Surely he was still at the castle, right?
>You should have already been able to at least gotten one opportunity to speak with him.
>”And will the Gryphon empire provide the guards for when the shipments reach the border?”
>You were behind schedule, by now you should have been on step two, fixing the rift you all caused.
>At this rate you would need at least another day, no two, definitely two days.
>”Princess Twilight.”
>What if you didn’t see him tomorrow, the whole plan would start coming undone, you need to make a plan b.
>”Princess Twilight!”
>Snapping from your inner thoughts you looked up to see both Princess Luna and Gilda looking at you intently.
“Sorry, got lost in thought. What were we talking about again?”
>Luna didn’t looked amused and Gilda only rubbed her temples with her claws.
>”The guard allocation, we were discussing the guard allocations for transport security.”
“Oh, right.”
>Buck, you weren’t paying attention in the slightest.
“I believe that the current numbers could stand to be increased.”
>Saved it!
>>
>>27893289
>”Very well, we will have the scribes create the documentation tomorrow. Judging by how late it is you both should get some rest, we’ll continue tomorrow.”
>With a bow Gilda turned and began her trip to her room.
>You however.
>”Was there something else Princess Twilight?”
>Okay Twilight play it cool, time to put your big mare socks on.
“I was wondering about Anon, I haven’t seen him all day. I would settle my nerves to see if he’s doing okay.”
>No sooner did the words leave your mouth, did Luna’s eyes narrow.
>”He is well and resting in our room. May I remind you, your presence here is to facilitate the diplomats visit, not worry about him. Unless your visit had an ulterior motive?”
>Buck.
“Of course, I was merely wondering. Have a good evening Princess, I’m going to get some rest.”
>So you wouldn’t get anything out of Luna, but Anon was here, that much was certain.
>You have to see him tomorrow, no matter what.

---
Done for now.
>>
>>27893304
>not poisoning Anon's food with mind-control voodoo magic
I'm pleasantly surprised. Nice short update.
>>
>>27893418
shhh anon don't give 'em ideas
>>
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>>27893146
>“Say ahhhh.”
>>Opening her mouth she greedily engulfed the entire spoonful and hmm’d in delight.
>>”Ithss sho good.”

So fucking cute.
>>
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Which of the Mane 6 would be such a loser they would need to beg to get laid ?

My money is on Dash.
>>
>>27893304
>”Very well, we will have the scribes create the documentation tomorrow. Judging by how late it is you both should get some rest, we’ll continue tomorrow.”
Great. Then the guards are attacked by 'bandits' who make off with the trade goods. If it's on the griffon side of the border, don't just knock out the guards. That'll show them for having a shitbird like gilda as a diplomat.
>>
>>27893418
Anon already covered that base in the last thread by saying he would cook his own food to prevent those kinds of shenanigans.
>>
>>27893418
They can't, Anon is preparing his own meals. So only things Anon uses is going into the food he eats.
>>
>>27893545
She seemed to be doing an adequate job of it though.
>>
This is the next section for the First Impression Prologue, found here. http://pastebin.com/grFxJqKR

“Ah, of course! How silly of me. I’m sorry, Anonymous. Sometimes in all of the hustle and bustle things just slip my mind. Oh – Twilight dear? Do you recognize this silverware? They’re the spares from the dining room. They’re actually real silver, and look at the markings. Aren’t they nice?” you ask the lavender unicorn casually, the heat in your right cheek multiplying exponentially from the feeling of your secretary’s unreturned glare burning into the side of your head.
>You’re not even going to be able to convince her to drink a glass of water after this little stunt.
>”Oh, yeah. They’re… they’re nice.” Replies Twilight distantly.
>It wasn’t exactly important, but she doesn’t even look at you, let alone the items in question.
>Her horn is flickering to life, or rather, TRYING to, but she can’t seem to get a firm mental grip on her saddlebags while Anonymous is looking in her direction, even if it’s not directly at her.
>As resolute as she had been when Eggnog goaded her further inside, she was so distracted that she hadn’t even set her things down somewhere on the way, and now her books, journals, inkwells and (you assume) a sandwich and cookies were now awkwardly smooshed in between her and the back of her chair.
>You wordlessly reach out and take the bridge of her bags in your aura, carefully lifting them above her head and drifting them across the room.
>You can feel his eyes on you again, and even YOUR focus dips slightly from the effect.
>He watches you with great interest every time you use magic, even for mundane things like telekinesis.
>You hadn’t spoken much about where he came from, but you were sure at this point that his kind’s brand of sorcery was quite different from yours, maybe even unrecognizable.
>>
>>27893747

>The purple unicorn flashes you a thankful smile as you set her things down near the other dresser at the start of the room where Eggnog placed her report.
>The silence returns now, even if it isn’t as tense as before.
>You can hear the soft sounds of the fuel fire behind you on the stove.
>The sound of the birds chittering outside are dulled significantly by his fastened windows.
>If you turn your ears you can just barely make out sounds in the hall, distant hoofsteps coming closer and then thudding away beyond your realm of hearing.
>You were starting to feel a little guilty.
>You’d mentioned earlier to your sister that you should spend more time with him on the merit of discovering any hidden intentions, but as you sit here in the stillness of his room, observe his mismatched furniture and ‘make-do’ kitchen, you feel as though you’re getting a glimpse of his new life in between visits from you and doctor Well Wishes; lonely and uncomfortable.
>Still, he’s smiling.
>Just a small turn of his mouth, just to himself, small but genuine, clearly happy just to have some extra company.
>You were usually busy, and before today you came alone.
>Well Wishes never stepped outside of her ‘business’ persona, probably to make interacting with him up close a little less nerve-racking.
>That, and she always came with a guard.
>Though you know your decisions concerning the safety of your ponies are sound, you can’t help but wonder if you would be taking so many precautions if he looked more like a pony himself, or a fuzzy woodland critter.
>You reach out, and the contact of your wing on his shoulder visibly surprises him.
>It was the fist time you’d made physical contact since that night.
“Anonymous?” you say gently, gaining the male’s attention.
>His body feels warm, even against your less sensitive wing tip and through his thin sheet of clothing.
>Just like everypony else’s.
>>
>>27893757

“How are you feeling? Does your head hurt at all? Do you want to talk about anything?” you ask.
>You look into his eyes and fight the urge to turn away.
>They weren’t like a pony’s, and they were a little harsh, but they weren’t… bad, so much.
>They were unique, just like him.
>Anonymous’ face softens further at your questions, and the arm closest to you rises.
>He doesn’t grab you, no.
>He simply touches the edges of your secondary feathers, the slight disturbance from the light touch sending small tingles up your wing pit and into your joint.
>“No,” he begins, shaking his head a little, “I’m fine. Maybe a little muddled here and there, but I’m okay… Thank you.”
>His smile grows as he speaks, and you can feel your face warming.
>You look away shortly before he does, both of you returning your limbs to your sides.
>The two unicorns are looking between you, clearly having examined the small exchange with great interest.
>Twilight especially.
>After another short bout of silence, this one quite content on your end, she speaks, her voice strained but clear.
>”Uhh, so, Mr. Anonymous. ” she says, pausing when he turns to look at her, “W-where did you, um… where are you from, again?” she continues with some difficulty, trying her best to begin some basic pleasantries.
>”Oh, um—” Anonymous starts, flashing you a quick look and stumbling as he tries to remember the details.
>You swoop in without a second thought.
“He’s from the east. Ahh, east of Bovaria, that is.” You answer quickly, absentmindedly separating the six plates you brought with you from the royal kitchen into groupings of four and two before dividing the four group between everypony at the table.
>”Oh…?” Twilight responds with some confusion, clearly noticing his hesitance and your hasty reply, “I’ve never heard of islands on the coast of Bovaria… is your home inland, or farther out?”
>>
>>27893747
Fuck yeah.
>>
>>27893763

>With how few ponies truly took the time to learn the full geography of the world or the cultures that populated the places beyond their individual towns, it was surprising meeting one who could scrutinize tales of far off lands.
>’East of Bovaria’ was an in-the-moment, imperfect, if effective way to explain away Anonymous’ interesting features if things suddenly went wrong in the days following his arrival – if he was ever singled out to the common populace.
>’Bovaria?’
>’That’s where the Minotaurs are, right?’
>’He kinda looks like a Minotaur, I guess that checks out!’
>Twilight wasn’t just a common pony from a small village, though; she was your student.
>You couldn’t expect this ruse to last FOREVER against studious minds or the particularly adventurous types, but it was one of the only locations that was both foreign AND loosely explored enough to sell his origins, not to mention that he did look faintly like a Minotaur.
>No matter; you weren’t planning on keeping it from her much longer.
>”Uhm, yes, we’re a little farther out. We—Humans, that is—there aren’t many of us, and we don’t leave home much. Like to keep to ourselves…” Anonymous continues, shooting you another quick look.
>Thankfully, before anypony could manage any more questions, a shrill whistle fills the room from the stovetop behind you.
>Before you can object, Anonymous, all too eager to move on, quickly rises from his seat to deal with the boiling water.
>This has the usual effect of causing the unicorns to scoot back in their chairs and fold their ears, but it also causes him to sway in place slightly and grab hold of the foot of his bed, grunting softly in apparent pain as the fluid in his head shifts.
“Anonymous, no, you should be resting. Please sit down. I’ll get it, it’s no trouble.” You say, watching him hang his head and hold his temple in his palm.
>He’s injured.
>>
>>27893772

>You’ve been letting him run around for you and you didn’t even realize.
>You could write this off as nerves in the moment, and you didn’t much want to admit it, but a part of you was probably a little too comfortable with the idea of being waited on by a stallion.
>Anonymous stands still for a moment and lets the dizziness pass him by, offering you an apologetic smile as the kettle and matching assortment of teacups he’d left sitting on a cool part of the stove float over the table in a golden aura and begin doling themselves out to each table member.
>”Nnn, sorry princess. Maybe I’m a little more muddled than I thought I was…” he replies, sliding his hand away from his bed as he eases back on to the ground, “I’ve never had a concussion before, so the recovery process is a little new to me.”
>He looks down now, staring blankly into the moist steam that rose from his glass.
>“I guess… everything’s still a little new to me...” he goes on, faintly melancholy, now examining the globular shift of golden energy around the teabags as you dip them into each cup and send the mostly empty kettle away to the stove.
>You want to say something but you can’t find the right words, and not purely in the interest of keeping up his dignified first impression with Twilight.
>Him returning to where he came from hadn’t gotten any more realistic over time, and you had been quite up front with that fact.
>If anything he had been taking things strangely well; you could only imagine what he must be feeling.
>You want to reach out and touch him again, but you stop yourself short when he turns and notices you staring at him.
>You look away a little too slowly and he hastily exchanges his troubled look for a smile, chuckling then and reaching out with his hands to test the heat of his cup.
>>
>>27893781

>”It feels a little sleazy saying this at noon, but I think I could use a drink, haha.” He laughs, reaching up to delicately adjust the white band around his head.
“Oh?” your reply, ready as he was to change the subject, “I didn’t know you partook, Anonymous. Maybe when your health has improved I could buy you a bottle of wine to celebrate?” You offer, lifting your cup and blowing on the liquid within.
>”Hah, Whiskey more-like. Haven’t had any in ages.” He replies with an impish grin, doing the same with his own tea.
>You stop before you can test a sip, your brow jumping a little in surprise.
>Whiskey was a Gryphon drink.
>It was a tad stronger than what ponies usually went for, not counting yours truly or your next of kin.
>You didn’t see much of it down here so not a lot of ponies drank it, certainly not any stallion you’d ever known.
>The usual setting one imagined in their mind of colts drinking consisted of them daintily sipping sweet grape liquor from a long-stemmed glass, their straight posture and measured tone concealing their inebriation.
>Mares drank bitter cider with rugged indifference and got riled up, bold.
>Bold enough to APPROACH the wine-pecking colt table to try and win a little attention.
>Reality rarely disagreed with this image but there were exceptions to every rule; one of them was apparently in front of you.
>Of course, you were assuming everything was the same volume just because you shared so many other similarities.
>Maybe human whiskey was different?
>”Goodness, but isn’t that a little strong? The Gryphonian whiskey around here nearly reaches thirty-five proof, sometimes forty.” You remark, lowering your glass with interest.
>”Naw, that’s actually a little low compared to what I’m used to.” Anonymous replies after taking a sip of his tea, “My favorite stuff back home was usually about forty percent, sometimes forty-five.
>…What?
>>
>>27893787

>”Um…” Eggnog interjects, swallowing a large lump of carrot cake from the piece she’d sliced herself while you were chatting, “Y-you mean… forty or forty-five PROOF… right?” she tries, shrinking slightly when he turned his full attention to her.
>He must’ve misspoke.
>Stallions didn’t always pay much attention to alcohol outside special occasions, and proofing was more of a hard cider thing than a wine thing.
>”Mm, no? I don’t think so. You guys count proof as double the content around here too, right?” he replies, reaching for the untouched chocolate cake with the intent of following the yellow unicorn’s lead, “If that’s so, then yeah, about eighty proof – forty percent give or take? You know, haha, if I was feeling real desperate and was light on funds? I’d drink these little apple shots from the store down the street. Nintey-nine’s they were called, on account of their proof. They were fifty percent or thereabout.”
>”Crackers…” Eggnog whispers under her breath.
>If you were surprised before you’re in absolutely awe now, and the other ponies at the table share your disbelief.
>That was stronger than even you or Luna’s personal stash.
>Really, it’s not completely unbelievable that he could drink a higher amount than average given his size; you did the same.
>But eighty percent?
>Nintey-Nine?
>Even with how imposing he could be physically, you had a hard time imagining that somepony with such a sweet voice and innocent personality could drink something like that.
>Did his family own a distillery?
>Did he start drinking when he was a foal?
“That’s – that’s certainly… Interesting.” you attempt lamely as he scoops a sliver of cake onto his plate.
>He offers you the knife and you take it in your magic with a frown, remembering too late that you were SUPPOSED to be doing things FOR him so that he could relax.


.
>>
GHOULIES
>>
>>27893794

>Focus; he’s been moving around since he woke up, and against doctor’s orders.
>You’d just need to watch him.
>And… maybe stir Twilight from her stupor.
>She was staring blankly at him again, and it was getting harder for you not to notice.
>She was also the only one in the room who’d made no progress eating or drinking even though she had both her own AND your food sources to choose from.
>Her sandwich was probably quite crushed from all the things she’d stuffed into her pack, but still.
>”So, Twilight,” you begin, successfully drawing her away from the human, “How’s your book coming along? I know you’ve been working very hard on it.” You remark, taking it upon yourself to deliver a small chocolate slab onto her empty plate.
>You have to ASSUME she’s working hard on it from all of the friendship reports piling up in your study.
>You-… you were going to get to them.
>It’s been a long week.
>”B-Book?” She replies, blinking, her quizzical expression quickly dawning into realization, ”Oh yes! Yes, yes, it’s going fine. I’m getting stuck on a few parts here and there but I think the first draft is almost done. I keep find mistakes when I reread things, though. It’s making me a little anxious.” She admits diffidently, prodding at her cake with a purple-tinged fork.
>”You’re a writer?” Anonymous asks with a hint of admiration, staying a taste of his own.
>”Um, well… I’m trying to be.” Twilight responds, her fork momentarily quivering in the air.
>You finally take your first bite, the smile on your face growing, and not just because of the warm, rich taste filling your mouth.
>>
>>27893808

>”I’ve always wanted to be a writer. I’ve had a few ideas for stories in the past but I’m not very talented, and I don’t know if I could sit down and iron out an entire book without losing interest. If you’re almost done you must be really dedicated, way more dedicated than I’ve ever been. I can’t wait to read it, I bet it’ll be really good.” He says, giving your student a warm look.
>”Oh, uh… w-well,” Twilight stumbles, her face burning from the unexpected flattery, “Thank you… uh… sir.” She replies stiffly.
>”It… it DOES take a lot dedication, plus proper knowledge of grammatical phrasing, composition and proper spelling.” Twilight says, gaining a little confidence, “It was a little slow at first, but once I was sure I could consummate properly I—”
>You hear a quiet snort, and Eggnog has to drink from her cup through a mouthful of food to hide her burgeoning grin.
>”R-rather – I mean, CONJUGATE properly,” she amends, her eyes widening a bit in restrained horror before she turned them to squint spitefully at the other unicorn, “It was… I was able to write more easily.”
>Anonymous doesn’t notice your secretary’s small sound or Twilight’s flub, or perhaps pretends not to, but Twilight definitely notices both of them, especially after the light yellow pony coughs once or twice trying to get her cake and tea down through fragments of giggling.
>”Hrm, be careful, miss Cream.” Twilight comments in a tone of chilly, faux concern, looking up and away as she lifts her own drink in her lavender aura, “It would be a shame if you were to CHOKE on anything.” She continues with special emphasis, taking a reserved sip.
>There’s a pause, after which everypony, even Eggnog, begins to smile and laugh softly.
>As Anonymous’ voice rose in volume and became more genuine, you couldn’t help but notice that this was probably the first time you’d ever heard him do it.
>Laugh, that is.
>>
>>27893819

>Really, really laugh, from his belly as opposed to soft titters or low chuckles.
>You liked it.
>It was nice.
>THIS was nice.
>Through everypony’s combined efforts the mood was finally lightening up, and it showed.
>As your pupil went on about literary devices she was trying to make work, the common phrases she wanted to come together at the end, or even traded subtle blows with your aid, the memory of her freezing up in his doorway starts to ebb away from memory.
>Your conversations drift comfortably to everything and anything; other literature, funny stories, music, alcohol and even, given some back and forth prodding from the unicorns, some stories about past relationships or encounters with the opposite sex, which even Anonymous contributes to.
>Before you knew it, through all the talk of colts, clarinets and caberneighs, the small wall clock in Anonymous’ room is already straying dangerously close to one o’clock, and your aid is starting to get antsy to return to work.
>Your time is up.
>You stand with finality and announce the time, reminding both them AND you that you had important things to do.
>”That time already, huh?” Anonymous says, rising.
>You shepherd your little ponies around his bits of furniture to the exit, standing with them in the hall and turning to say your goodbyes through the crack in his doors.
>”Thank you for having us, sir.” Your secretary says, peering away and adjusting her glasses, “It was very, ah… nice, seeing you again.”
>”Please, just Anonymous, and likewise Miss Cream.” The male replies with a warm look, tinting her cheeks with his respecting personal title.
>”E-Eggnog will suffice.” She replies quickly, her eyewear-fiddling increasing in intensity as he smiles in acceptance.
>”It was nice meeting you, Anonymous.” Twilight says, shifting under the weight of her returned saddlebags, “I won’t be staying for much longer, so maybe we can talk again some other time?” She offers.
>>
>>27893827

>”I’d like that.” He replies kindly, giving her a nod.
>Finally, he looks to you.
>”Thanks for bringing everyone. I had a nice time, Celestia.” He says.
“Of course, Anonymous.” You reply, lighting your horn and gently sliding the bandage on his head further up, careful not to hurt him.
>He reaches up absently and touches the linen with the tips of his fingers, his piercing eyes freezing you in place as they stare into yours.
>You can see something in those vibrant orbs, or you think you can.
>You can’t quite identify what it is but you know it’s there.
>”You’ll… you’ll come back tomorrow, right?” he asks hopefully, holding your gaze a while before suddenly averting his eyes and smiling widely.
>Too widely.
>”Haha, we, ah… we never got to finish that story about your sister’s birthday party.” he clarifies quickly, rubbing the back of his neck with his digits.
>Your heart sinks a little, and he notices it instantly in your expression.
“I’m sorry Anonymous…” you begin, averting your eyes as well, “Miss Cream and I have a brunch meeting with some members of the Yakistani vice wardens, and, well… you know how my evenings are already…” you state remorsefully.
>”Oh, yes, of course.” He replies, giving you an understanding look, “I’ve only been here a few days, but I already know how tied up you can get. It’s not a problem, I’ll, uhh… I’ll be right here, you know?” He says with a quick grin, turning to regard his room for a moment.
>His dark, quiet, foreign room.
“I’ll be sure to make some time in my schedule as soon as possible.” You say honestly, winning back his attention, “Maybe I’ll bring Luna along as well? I’ve already told everypony I know the story, so I never get the opportunity to tease her about it in front of company anymore.” you continue jovially, earning a soft, coltish chuckle.
>>
>>27893833

>”Sounds nice… Uh, well, I’m glad you three had a good time.” He replies, standing still for a long time before noticing nothing was happening, “Have a good afternoon.”
>He backs away, and the void between his doors begins to shrink.
>It’s a long, profound action, and his eyes linger in yours until he finally vanishes from sight.
>You turn on instinct and begin back down the hallway, your two small companions forming up behind you.
>Eventually, as you were expecting, one of them breaks away and draws up to your side, their familiar voice bringing an end to the silence that had enveloped the corridor.
>”Celestia?” you student begins, unsure of herself.
>”Where is… Anonymous isn’t… from any Bovarian islands, is he…?” she asks, her volume just above a whisper.
>A long sigh escapes your weary body as you turn to examine her.
>Her astute, deep purple eyes reflect your own worry, even if not to the same depth.
“I’m afraid I haven’t been entirely truthful with you.” You reply, looking forward, “We need to talk.”
_____________________
>>
>>27893841

That's it for this section. I'm getting close to the end, and the next scene will probably be the last one, and pretty 'heated', so stay tuned. Until then, here's my updated pastebin, and I hope you enjoyed. Question, comments, critique, etc.
http://pastebin.com/u/tANDghouls
>>
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>>27893763
>>His smile grows as he speaks, and you can feel your face warming.
Now that's a cute image, Celestia blushing.
>>
>>27893881
hm mm comfy scene. you make a nice anon who makes the best of a bad situation even with the crippling loneliness he endures.
is this the prologue complete or are you gonna add a scene with lulu?
whatever you decide keep going
>>
>>27893949
Cute Celly 2 cute

>>27893994
Mm, outside of mentions in conversation Luna's prob gonna sit the rest of this one out. Just like in the SHOW but for the whole SEASON! Haha! Hah! Okay... I'll leave now... Maybe I'll do more with her in rambles or a new cannon. Or hell, if LaP is still doing his Luna green then he might scratch that itch for the both of us.

>>27891344
Speaking of, great job. LaP u so gud doe. I could read the adventures of BuffNon in saucy poneland all day and forever. All day. Forever.
>>
>>27893881
Please don't stop writing green, ghoul. Your stories are captivating, and really well written
>>
>>27893881
I'm reading through the pastebin (thanks, btw, for posting that. It's very helpful for newcomers to the thread) and I like your story. The only real criticism is that there's too much prose. I find myself skipping lines and skimming the words until I reach the point where the event you are describing occurs.

>The silky whisper of his makeshift clothing as he moves past your still body is a roar next to the loud thud of your companion’s hoofsteps as they enter his domain.

Again; good, but too much prose.
>>
>>27893881
Celly needs some loving.
>>
>>27893304
Start tripping.
>>
>>27894362
I appreciate you saying so man, thanks. I hope you enjoy what I have cooking for the future.

>>27894456
Wow, I'm glad your reading through the pastebin stuff. My green DOES drone on a bit so it's always nice hearing that people are going back to read it all. I wanted to try and shift the tone a little bit when Anon came back into the story, but I might've been a little ham-fisted with my imagery. That's actually a pretty good example, haha.

>>27894470
Praise that sun iykwim

>>27894565
Seconded.
>>
>>27893881
That's some good shit.
More bomb ass than any tea.
>>
>>27894595
If you ever leave, I will tie you to a bed and set your neighbor's house on fire.
>>
>>27893507
Please tell me the source for this
>>
>>27895254
Glad you liked it, more will be coming soon.

>>27895264
I'll get right on being flattered just as soon as I'm done pissing all over myself, I promise. Thanks for reading.
>>
>>27893304
>You woke up with a slightly different pony in your arms than you went to sleep with.
>While Celestia smelled of lilacs and a habit of trying to smother you with her chest tuft, Luna’s scent was more sweet, like cherries and rose blossoms.
>That and she loved just snuggling up to you.
>Finally willing your eyes to open you cast your gaze down, to where a certain mare lay atop you. Her head resting on your chest she occasionally let out a faint snore.
>She must have switched spots with Celestia after her shift was over.
>Reaching up you ran your hand through her silken mane, without whatever magic coursing through it looked just like any other mares.
>But the stars within it still gleamed brightly, twinkling occasionally whenever she made the slightest movement.
>The sight made your heartbeat just a tad faster.
>Now came the biggest problem, you had to use the bathroom. Bad.
>And doing so without waking the obviously tuckered out mare was going prove to be a real challenge.
>Ever so slowly you dragged a pillow to your side and slowly nudged her onto it.
>Luna instinctively wrapped her hooves around it letting out a tiny whine, visibly upset by the lack of whatever it was she was snuggling.
>As carefully and silently as your clumsy gait would allow you moved to the bathroom to take care of your morning needs.
>No matter how much you wanted to stay in bed with her and cuddle, you did want to get a bite to eat and stretch your legs.
>With asking the chefs to work something up for you out of the equation, the task came down to you.
>It was still early, you noticed as you made your way to the kitchens.
>The guards on duty looked just about as tired as you felt, and the maids were busy sprucing everything up.
>But besides them, the castle was deserted.
>All the better for you, as far as you were concerned.
>The moment you got to the kitchen you began making your breakfast, fetching the various ingredients from the fridge and cupboard.
>>
>>27895438
>You weren’t making anything fancy, some scrambled eggs and hash-browns with some fresh squeezes orange juice.
>Throwing everything on the skillet you began squeezing the oranges.
>Your thoughts wondered onto what you would pre-occupy yourself with today.
>Maybe you should drop by the library and pick up a book or two, it couldn’t hurt.
>But there was a chance you would run into a certain book obsessed pony.
>Flipping the eggs and hash, you continued with your musings.
>She was the main reason for yourself imposed isolation, but that didn’t mean you would just stop functioning completely.
>Depositing the contents of the skillet to a clean plate you picked it up along with your glass of juice.
>Oh crap.
>Standing there with a plate full of food and juice, you just realized a somewhat interesting conundrum.
>You couldn’t go back to your room since Luna was still sleeping and you couldn’t chance going to the dining room in case the troublemakers were there.
>Crap.
>You could always eat outside, in one of the secluded areas in the garden.
>With a plan now in mind, you set off outside with your meal in hand.
>Making a mental note to return to clean up after yourself later.
>>
>>27895454
>Horseapples.
>Twasn’t fair, Rainbow and Twilight were off trying to get back Anon and here you were twirlin yer hooves.
>”I’m off to school sis!”
“You take care now Applebloom.”
>”Kay.” With that your little sister was off. No doubt she would cause some mischief on the way there that you’d have to take care of later.
>This is what yer days went by like. Take care of a few things on the farm, make sure the trees looked good for the next harvest.
>That’s about it.
>You should be there tryin ta get your stallion back with em, not sitting around.
>That’s right, you were a mares mare, you weren’t about to just sit on your plot and do nothing.
>If there was any self-respect left in ya, you should get on the next train to Canterlot and help them in their plan.
“Granny I’m heading out for a bit.”
>”Whas that now?”
“I’m headin ta Canterlot, I’ll be back soon.”
>Slidding your saddle bags on you were out the door in seconds.
>It was time to do your part and get your stallion back.

---
Done for day.

>>27894565
>>27894595
I'll try to be better with using my name here.
>>
>>27895483
Royal herd's lookin' good, I'm interested to see what she'll do. You putting your stuff in a pastebin? Got a link?
>>
>>27895530
Yup, http://pastebin.com/m3290Td5
I'm glad you like it.
>>
>>27895483
Good update, friendo. Of Anon's old herd, Applejack seems the most likely to sit and listen to what Anon has to say and least likely to dismiss him and his feelings. This is why applehorse is the best horse. Simple, honest, and down to earth.
>>
>>27895367
Reverse Google image search says this:

https://hitomi.la/galleries/955183.html
>>
>>27895367
http://exhentai.org/g/955183/ef930ad09b/
>>
>>27895620
>>27895758
Thanks
>>
>>27893507
>I thought I would never lose my virginity thanks to my freakishly long torso and massive, deformed hips.
>>
>>27891344
wtf
>>
>>27893507
Nah, Dash would be the least-experienced mare of the mane 6, but she'd try to hide in behind her bravado and shit.

>Virgin Dash tries to hide how much of a loser she is

"Mmmmwah!"
>You pull back from the kiss, feeling oddly satisfied that you managed to leave a bridge of saliva connecting yours and Dashie's mouth.
>You are Anon, and things are getting pretty hot and heavy with Rainbow Dash.
>She had suggested that the two of you retire to the bedroom, and you were eager to stick your dick in that.
>You might even be able to cum inside of Rainbow Dash.
>Your cyan marefriend crawls onto the bed and wriggles her rump at you.
>She's dripping all sorts of gross-smelling soupy fluids all over your sheets; you'll have to remember to do this sort of thing at her house next time.
>Still, in your aroused stated, you find that the sight only makes your cock harder.
>"C'mon, Anon... you want this?"
>Why, yes.
>Yes you do.
>You crawl over to Dashie's body so that you can mount her from behind.
>Ponies still thought it was weird that you wanted to "do the do" belly-to-belly, but you're working on that.
>Applejack just laughed and called you a "typical romantic colt" when you said you wanted to see your partner's face.
>"Y-yeah! Put it in, Anon!"
>She pushes back against you, trapping your cock up against her left thigh.
>Whoopsie.
>She pulls back again and you reach down to line yourself up....
>...and she pushes back again.
>This time your dick just pokes her in the taint.
>It kind of hurts, to be honest.
>>
>>27896001
>"Are-are you ready? I'm jus- I'm going to make you f-feel so good!"
>She wriggles her ass up around your belly-button and moans.
>It sounds really fake.
"Dash."
>Rainbow Dash pulls away to try again.
"Rainbow Dash."
>She thrusts her hips backwards but misses your crotch entirely; she just sort of stops in mid-air.
"Dashie, are you sure you're ready to do this?"
>Rainbow Dash whips her head and glares at you.
>"Sh-shut up! I can - I've had sex before!"
>She pushes her hips back once more and succeeds in booping your member with her dock.
>"C'mon, Rainbow," you hear her mumble, "Just do it like they did in those magazines you found under Twilight's bed."
>Oh boy.
>Today was a "how is babby formed; how girl get pragnent" kind of day.
>Dash came after two pumps and cried. You hugged her and assured her that nobody lasts long their first time and that you enjoyed yourself a lot.

>>27895483
Sick update yo
I really like what you're doing with this story.

>>27895389
I'm a fan, ghouls. It's a bit wordy, but it shows that you have a good vocabulary at your disposal.
>>
>>27896001
>in your aroused stated
>state*
I am a goddamn retard.
>>
>>27896010
That probably made me more sad than that breakup short I wrote last thread.
>>
>>27896042
Oh shit, I need to catch up with the green from the last few threads.

Rainbow Dash also felt really insecure about how tight her cooter was and didn't want to do belly-to-belly sex because she thought her chest tuft was too thin.
>>
>>27896042
There's no reason to be sad.
It just means Dash and Anon will need a lot more chances to try again to get it right.
>>
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>>27896010
>spoiler
Why did he stop?
The only way to get better is to practice, practice, practice.
>>
>>27896010
>>27896065
>Rainbow Dash won't say anything as you pull out of her, your crotch (and the bed immediately below you) soaked in Dashie's horse juices.
>After gracing you with the loudest moan you've heard in your life, Rainbow laid still, panting to catch her breath.
>That was fun and all, but you barely even got your dick wet before she came and fucking collapsed on the bed.
>Playtime is over, you guess.
>You crawl over Rainbow and lay down next to her.
"Was it good for you too?"
>She's still silent.
>She isn't even bothering to look at you.
"...Rainbow?"
>That's when she starts to shake.
>You can hear the beginning of a case of hiccups as she tries to hold in the sniffles.
"Rainbow, sweetie..."
>You wrap your arms around her sweaty body and gently pull her into a hug.
>Given how still and silent she had been, you're surprised when she wraps her hooves around your neck and hugs you tight.
>"I-I-I'm s-sorry!"
>Why is she apologizing?
"What on earth are you apologizing for?"
>Rainbow buries her face in your shoulder, her cries turning into sobs.
>"I c-c-came after two p-pumps.... I-I-I was supposed t-to make you f-feel good too!"
>You plant a kiss on top of her multicolored mane and start rocking her back and forth.
"Rainbow, no..."
>She bites out a harsh laugh.
>"Celestia... I'm s-so bucking p-pathetic!"
>It's half an hour before your special somepony calms down enough for you to talk about what happened.
>She was surprised that you weren't going to dump her for being a "two-pump chump"
>You promised her that the two of you would get in lots more practice so that it would be fun for both of you.
>>
>>27896323
"You have a mouth you know. I'm sure my dick won't be able to tell much of a difference between your pussy and your muzzle if you really want to make me cum too. Just saying."
>>
>>27896375
Not cool Anon.
>>
>>27896411
>Not wanting to force your marefriend to be a beta by using her throat like a fucktoy
>>
>>27896312
>Pinkie Pie constantly ribs Rainbow Dash about how she's going to steal Anon away if she doesn't make a move first
>This just makes her nervous that Pinkie will swoop in and take Anon from her if she doesn't "mare up" and give Anon sum fuk bby
>>
>>27896375
>tries to give you a blowjob
>rakes you with her teeth out of inexperience
>>
>>27896508
>Takes you to the back of her throat
>Throws up on your crotch
>Locks herself in the bathroom for an hour
>>
>>27896584
>knock on door
>"don't feel bad, dashie"
>"mares puking in my lap is one of my many fetishes"
>"you didn't do anything wrong"
>>
>>27896584
>Locks herself in the bathroom for an hour

Uh, actually, I think that having puke all over my dick is a pretty important reason to be able to get into a bathroom as quickly as possible.
>>
prompt:
>Anon has a particularly strong-smelling musk, by pony standards
>This is incorporated into an RGRE setting where sexist mares act and react to this particular characteristic, interacting with Anon in ways unique to their personality with various end goals; often times sexual in nature
>>
>>27896598
I didn't ask for a reply like this when I made the "throws up on your crotch" post. I thought I might have gotten a "kek" or maybe (if I was lucky) a single-post story where Anon deals with an awkward lover. Not "my fetish".
>>
>>27896010
Ayy, thanks ApA, and nice oneshots there. They were great even with a few words.

>>27896508
>>27896584
>>27896598
Fukkin' lol'd, holy shit i'm choking on my spit
>>
I'd love to live in this paradise where lots of mares want to fuck me and pay attention to me just because I have a penis.
>>
>>27896649
Thanks, ghouls. I specialize in train-of-thought style writing.

>>27896651
Me too, Anon. Imagine being a chubby nerd and there being a bunch of girls who think that's so fucking hot.
>>
>Anon gets teleported to Equestria in the middle of day court
>Luna finds out
>Tries to make anon feel comfortable in Canterlot
>Does this in a very dad way because RGRE
>Celestia is motherly the whole time.
>Looks into Anon's dreams and sees Anon viewing Luna as the male parent.
>Thought she was being too soft on anon.
>Hijinks ensue
>>
>>27896818
What.
>>
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>>27896846
>>27896818
I have no clue but the greens in this thread are always hilarious, and since Bomb Shell is dead and who knows when LaP will continue I say go for it
>>
>>27896886
Think this was what anon was trying to say

>anon goes to equestria because reasons
>arrives when celestia is running the day court
>luna finds out (?)
>both luna and celestia try to make anon feel comfortable in rgrequestria
>anon one day slips and calls one of them dad (I think)
>they think anon sees them as stallion-y.
>try to out-mom each other

Was this about right anon?
>>
>>27896623
> Ponies think Anon looks weird
> Major butthisface going on
> Anon goes jogging in the early morning
> Mares in the area are unaccountably wet
> Anon's stallion friends are oddly confident he'll find someone
> Some mare drops by (Derpy?) just as he takes off his exercise clothes
> Pheromoneexplosion.vhs
> Mare snags his discarded tank top and runs away
> Anon doesn't understand because of inferior monkey nose
>>
>>27896962
>> Ponies think Anon looks weird
>Implying half of the mares in town don't have a monsterguy fetish
>>
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>>27896001
>>Virgin Dash tries to hide how much of a loser she is
I'm already experiencing an irregular heartbeat.
>>
>>27896962
>You are Caramel, and you're walking shell-shocked away from your first morning run with the new colt in town.
>The smell.
>THE SMELL.
>If you weren't interested exclusively with mares, you'd be spending each and every morning rolling around on Anon's empty bed, bathing yourself in his scent.
>You're accosted by that jerk, Rainbow Dash, just as you reach your house.
>"Hey, 'Mel!"
>Ugh.
>You HATE that nickname.
"Don't call me that, Rainbow Crash."
>Rainbow gives you a dirty look, which vanishes when she catches sight of Anon's back as he walks back home.
>"Hanging out with that weird stallions, eh? Colts got to stick together, I guess."
>That last sentence was sarcastic, by the way.
>You know this because you, Caramel, heard the mocking tone with your ears.
>Rainbow, proud as ever, wraps a foreleg around your neck; you promptly shove it off.
"Anon might be a little bit... unique, Rainbow Dash, but I'll bet you anything that he'll be swept off his hooves by a beautiful mare the moment he lets one get close to him."
>Rainbow Dash's chest heaves as she tries to hold in her laughter.
>Obviously, she is unsuccessful.
>After less than five seconds, the cyan mare is rolling on the ground, howling with laughter.
>What a bitch.
"You think that's funny, do you? I'll give you ten bits if you hug him right now, before he gets home and showers. You'll see exactly what I mean."
>Rainbow Dash stands up on unsteady legs and flaps her wings a few times to warm them up.
>"Pfft... I never turn down free money. I'll be back before you know it, 'Mel!"
>An hour later, a sweaty and blushing Rainbow Dash knocks on your door.
>Dazed and reeking of sex, she asks your doorbell for those ten bits you owe her before passing out on your doorstep.
>You close the door and return to your knitting.
>>
>>27897049
It's hitting real close to home
>>
>>27897049
>Ponies aggressively demanding innocent gestures of affection
>"Anon, don't go! I need more belly rubs!"
>"I-If you stop scratching my ears, I'll die! Don't you dare leave now!"
>>
>>27892599
Hey now that's not fair. I wrote the first (I think) significant response to the original prompt in MP... wait, that's probably not something to brag about...
>>
>>27897107
>>Dazed and reeking of sex, she asks your doorbell for those ten bits you owe her before passing out on your doorstep.
What. The hell. Happened.
Please tell us almighty AA
>>
>>27897049
>Rainbow does things she heard second-hoof that she thinks colts like
>All while trying to act cool and collected, like she does this all the time
>"Jeez, where did I read this.... Hmmm.... I'm PRETTY sure that magazine said that colts like it when you nibble on the head of their penis..."
>>
>>27897123
Not what you'd think had happened. Dash snuck up behind Anon and hugged him. She tried to make a witty, somewhat arrogant and boastful comment (possibly insulting Anon in the process), but then she caught wind of her scent. After that, she forcibly removed Anon's shirt (Anon was none too happy about this, bear in mind), flew back home with it, and masturbated for an hour.
>>
>>27897149
Actually, fuck that. They fucked in the street. Anon grabbed her out of the air, Rainbow got Anon all hot and bothered, and they fucked right in front of Applejack's apple stand.
>>
>>27893841
Really loving this story ghouls.
>>
>>27897149
This one is more realistic.
>>
>>27894456
That's a matter of taste of course. I quite enjoy the heavily descriptive style.
>>
>>27897156
But this one is the one I choose to believe.
>>
>>27896886
Pfff, like something stopping us from writing more Shell by ourselves. I'll probably try to come up with some green. But still, have faith in bnw and cool kiddo
>>
>>27897282
Thanks for reading man, more's a commin'.

>>27897149
>>27897156
Well, NOW you have to create a long series of branching stories, prequels, sequels, and brequels that describe in heavy detail all possible cannons.

Do it Appy
Do it for science

>>27898154
"What've you got there?"
>She's been staring at that piece of paper for nearly five minutes and she physically jumps when you call out to her.
>"A-Ah, it's nothing!" she says, flustered, tucking the page safely away.
>Very convincing.
>You approach her, setting your apron down on the table as you pass.
"Nothing, huh?" you say knowingly, placing your hands on your hips and peering down at her.
>She can't look you in the eyes, and she's trying her damndest to look unfazed by your stare-down.
>She is... without a doubt, the WORST liar you've ever met in your entire life.
>Now she's doing the 'innocent whistle' unironically.
"Mhm, c'mooooon." you say, reaching out and pulling one of her sunny locks behind her ear, "Show me."
>You're scratching her behind the same ear now, and you know she's starting to crack.
>When she finally hands you the paper she was hiding she doesn't look mischievous, she's definitely embarrassed.
>It's... paperwork for her ponyville citizen reapplication?
>Ah, you've seen this before.
>You had to do the standard version not too long ago, and you remember her getting a request for renewal of citizenship in the mail not to long ago.
>This must be the return copy; everything's typed in, and there's no boxes to add anything.
>You look away from the paper to examine her and she still looks embarrassed.
>"It's... it's downright unprofessional is what it is." she says with an ounce of sourness, fiddling her little hooves in her lap.
>What?
>Did she check the wrong box and now she's a unicorn or something?
>You return to the kitchen nook and lower the flames so that nothing burns, and then you scour the document, looking for her, or somepony's, awkward mistake.
>>
>>27898265
>Maybe you're just dumb, but you can't see anything?
>Her picture's there, all the fields look correct.
>Eye color's right.
>Pegasus, mhm.
>Birth date is right.
>Hrm.
>You lift the page from the table and return, tossing the look of your apron back over your neck.
"Looks fine to me, what's up?"
>She looks up and you and she seems surprised.
>Hurt, even.
>"W-what?" she replies, suddenly looking away and scanning the floor in shame, "I-... I thought I was, I mean... " she tries, crestfallen.
>"Am I not... are you not satisfied with me?" she whispers, curling her legs inward slightly.
>Woah, what?
>Where did that come from?
>You slide in next to her on the couch and wrap your arm around her withers, shaking her gently.
"Now why would you go and think I'm unsatisfied with anything about you? What does that have to do with this form?" you ask honestly, pecking her on the ear and handing her back the page.
>She's receptive to your actions but definitely still gloomy.
>"I... I just... I thought I was being honest. I gave myself a B-, right down the middle. I didn't wanna sound show-offy, but... why would they even wanna know something like that? And why would they fail me?"
>Her face is warming up, and she still can't look at you.
>"Do you... do you really think I'm that bad? I'm sorry, I-... I can do better... "
>"What? What are you talking about?" you reply, confused, craning your head over her shoulder to try and gain some clue.
>What IS she talking about?
>What grade?
>With a sorrowful sigh she reaches her hoof out and places it down on the page, underling a single table.
>Sex: F
>>
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>>27898310
Oh god that's ridiculous.
>>
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>>27898310
What a silly pony.
>>
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>>27898265
>>27898310
this made me belly laugh. such a silly filly.
>>
>>27898456
>>27898470
>>27898487
Remembered an old dumb blond joke and turned it into this. Seemed too perfect.
>>
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>>27898310
>>
>You are Anon
>God help you
>After Bomb Shell's face un-pugged, you offered to buy her a drink as an apology
>A nice, cool strawberry sizzle
>(extra sugar, but you didn't let her see that part of the order)
>For a while, everything was ok
>Tiny horse perched on your lap
>Adorable, sparkly eyes staring deep into your own
>Blush... forming on her... cute face
>S-senpai noticed her
>But then she did the...turning around thing that a cat does before sitting down
>Slammed her flank on your lap
>u-unf
>And then started tormenting you

>*wiggle wiggle wiggle wiggle wiggle*
>You are Bo-SEA SHELL
>But you could be forgiven for thinking you were somepony else
>I mean, a total 11/10 qt horsebando minotaur hits on you and you totally mare up and nothing bad happened at all and you swept him off his hooves and took him home and rutted all ni-
>You clop your forehooves together in glee as your mental movie continues to play out
>I mean, you can hope now!
>You didn't bomb it!
>Ooooh you're so happy you just can't stop WIGGLING
>You broke the ice with a colt....like...thing
>A male
>And now he's having another drink with you
>And then you walk him home and ask for some coffee
>And then...
>You stop wiggling for a moment, suddenly deep in thought

>You are Anon
>Thank you Lord; you don't need more mares following you home from popping a public boner
>You sigh deeply as you will the kraken back to it's cav-

>Hmmmmm....
>You know, thinking back to your foalhood....
>....you're not sure what happens then.
>But daddy always giggled whenever mom told that story, so...
>...so it must be something good!
>And then kisses and horse-hugs and then foals and then you can parade him around town and rub his flank RIGHT IN MOM'S STUPID HORSE FAC-
>You can't help but full-body wiggle right now cause EVERYTHING IS WONDERFUL-
>>
>>27898310
I need a continuation of this.

I NEED it, or I'll DIE.
>>
>>27896323
>"two-pump chump"
I need to reread that manga. The deliquent girls were the best.
>>
>>27899344
>You are Fizzy Sips
>And... you really need to hurry up on this order
>You're not paying full attention to the colt+mare couple over there at the bar-
>Tartarus, you get enough couples as is
>And there *are* other ponies to serve
>But, something is happening
>You can feel it in the earth
>You can feel it in your bones
>The mare's happily clapping to herself... eyes closed, ok, that's -whatever
>The colt, however, is gripping the bar tightly
>Like. His claws have gone from green to a light green - even white in some places
>His head is tilted back, teeth bared in a rictus grin
>I mean, you know you worked slow sometimes, but no need to be THAT dramatic
>Perfection takes time
>As the mare starts to wiggle and bounce, the tall minotaur starts to froth a little at the mouth
>YOU'RE JUST ONE MARE, COLT. COME ON.
>EVERYPONY'S A CRITIC

>-and then You'll show him off to Moondancer and then SHE'LL be the beta mare and then you'll use that psychological push to your advantage to FINALLY WIN A GAME OF BANHAMMER40K-
>You raise your forehooves up in victory, lost in your daydream
>YOU CAN BRING YOUR COLT TO THE GAME STORE! They said they'd give you that 800 bit CanterCastle Titan if you ever brought in a colt-
>Your face breaks into an open-mouthed, silent cheer
>Today is best day!

>You are Anon
>You feel your soul leaving your body
>By sheer willpower, you're forcing yourself not to have a boner
>Not here, Not now
>Not again
>You know as soon as she feels jr, she'll cause a scene, and then PONICE WINGS CUDDLE JANE will be there
>It's like she knows
>"Here's your drink! No need to be so dramatic-"
>You hear it slide down the bar, and you know what must be done
>But what a heavy price to pay
>Leaning forward, with your right hand, you stop the drink sliding down the bar
>This causes you to press against your new friend, Bomb Shell
>This causes her wiggles to go in all the wrong places
>Billymaysgivemestrength.mightyputty
>>
>>27899408
Oh.... Now you made me sad about Billy Mays.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=OpJGZ9RHAvU
>>
>>27899408
"Drr- Drr.... Drr~"
>Why can't you word
>'Drink is here, Bomb Shell!'
>That's not hard to say, so SAY IT
>Damn. The bonermancy is strong with this mare
>Not your fault they all have birthing hips and come-hither eyes
>And then this!
>"Oh!"
>She gasps
>"I-It was made for me!"
>She holds it inbetween her hooves, bringing it close
>"But...gee. Why do I get two straws?"
>She puts one in her mouth and then starts chasing the other around the glass with her lips
>Your body aches as blood rushes from your dick to your heart
>Hnnnggghhh
>All she's accomplishing is getting the whipped cream on her chin
>W-whatever
>The kraken is asleep
>Your new friend is still... your friend, you hope
>You really hope
>You need an excuse to get away from twilight time

>Mmmmmmmm~
>Strawberry goodness
>You're Sea Shell, the best and most suave mare
>And this is a much better drink than before!
>Kumquat syrup. Who in the right mind would even-
>Oh, right. Anon
>ANON. FUCK.
>You look up at your horsebando, realizing that, once again, you've been off in your own little world
>Damnit, SS. Get it together!
"O-oh, I'm sorry! I uh... I um..."
>What would Daring Do say in a situation like this
>'Don't worry, kid. One day I'll get screen time again.'
>Damnit, that didn't help at all
>What would your mom say?
>....something racist and sexist, most likely
>Damnit mom
>You're trying to win, ok?!
>"Y-yeee?" Anon sighs, his left eye twitching ever-so-cutely
>You gotta win! You gotta seal this deal!
>JANE MEADOW JANE MEADOW JANE MEADOW
>"W-who? What-"
>No this isn't hoofball
>Wait-
>Your face explodes in a blush as you realize what you softly chanted at him
"I'm plotting!"
>You meant to say PLANNING
>"O-oh?"
>You nod
"-And, I'll take you-"
>You mean, 'would you like to come-"
"-to a hay bar."
>WHSAKLDJA
>WHAT ARE YOU EVEN DOING RIGHT NOW
>You start to whine softly, not breaking eye contact with him
>As long as you maintain eye contact you will remain alpha
>REMAIN ALPHA
>>
>>27899493
>You are Anon
>Not for much longer
>This mare is going to kill you
>You lean back slightly, still keeping your arms on either side of her
>Still gripping the bar, just in case
>Turning around slightly in your lap, she looks up at you
>Whipped-cream soul patch and everything
>She gives you a look of D E T E R M I N A T I O N
>And then... promptly mumbles something at you
>Whelp
"Y-yeee?"
>Eesh. Words are still hard
>COME ON BODY, COME ON
>"Jane Meadow Jane Meadow Jane Meadow-"
>What?
>You shake your head slightly, trying to make the audio hallucinations go away
>"I'm plotting!"
>She furrows her brow at you as she says this
"O-oh?"
>There we go. Words are happening.
>"And I'll take you to a hay bar."
>She nods softly, looking directly into your eyes
>Just... deeply
>Like a deer does oncoming headlights
>Ears splayed back, mouth half-open, another soul-piercingly desperate whine coming from.... somewhere
>Her eyes widen
>...fuck is she staring into the infinite or something?!
>oh, right
>Jackass, she's waiting for you to say something
"W-well, I mean... I'm allergic to hay-"

>THIS IS HOW IT ENDS
>Deus iræ, deus illa-

>Your new little friend starts to vibrate
>Like, full-body vibrate
>oh dear
>You gently grab her sides, petting her off whatever little mental ledge she's on
"-but I'd be happy to meet you again? Say, for lunch tomorrow - there's this little outdoor bistro near the park we could go to-"
>You suddenly screw your eyes shut
>Because you've learned something today
>If happy enough, ponies will spontaneously sparkle
>"AAAAAAAAA YAAAAAAYYYYY-"
>If the sudden warm hug is any indication, you've made a great new friend!
>Yay!
>If the sudden wet, cool sensation on your pants is any indication, your dick is gonna smell like strawberries until you can get them washed
>...yay?


>You are BEST SHELL
>EEEEEEEEEEEEEEE
>FIRST DATE

>You are Fizzy Sips
>Damnit, you got another sparkler
>Those things are a bitch to clean up
>>
>>27899344
>>27899408
>>27899493
>>27899615
And done with the mini update. Pastebin updated here: http://pastebin.com/TSWyEtcM

May or may not write more, I dunno. It'd just be a slice of life thing, if I did - probably will do so later on...
>>
>>27899615
Top cute.
>>
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>>27899625
That was a big mini update.
>>
>>27898310
>>What grade?
>>With a sorrowful sigh she reaches her hoof out and places it down on the page, underling a single table.
>>Sex: F

Well played ghouls. Made me laugh
>>
>>27899493
>"Drr- Drr.... Drr~"

>"I-It was made for me!"

Don't think I didn't see what you did there BNW.
>>
>>27899625
>BShell update
EEEEEEE I LOVE HER TOO MUCH

Your mini update is a lot longer than any short update I make, that's for sure.
BEST SHELL a cutie. I would make a green about her but I don't think I have the ideas nor the shoulders to take the burden of RGRE's purest clueless mare.
>>
>>27899873
I knew I had heard those words, how dare you bring that back into my memory.
>>
This thread needs more french water.
>>
>>27900059
>Implying there's something wrong with regular water
>>
>>27900072
Everyone knows you have to spend at least $10 on water to feel extra fancy.
>>
>Ponies have pet names for Anon
>Casual friends like Pinkie Pie call him "Nonny" or "Nonners"
>Regular friends like Twilight call him "Anon" or " 'Non"
>Ponies with a secret crush on him like Rainbow Dash call him "Sweet Treat" when he isn't around to hear it
>Sometimes he is around, though
>>
>>27900475
as his truest and closest friends, the princesses refer to him as nigger or niggerfaggot
>>
>>27897121
Well keep writing them then.
>>27897149
>Anon goes and gets his shirt back.
>Dash taunts Anon about him not being able to fly.
>Anon lays traps all over town to capture her.
>Every pegasus in town is soon caged as a result of this.
>And possed with rainbow for starting this shit.
>Except for Derpy, who meant to get caught like all her friends were but was distracted.
>>27898310
I like you.
>>27900616
I don't like you.
>>27899615
It's okay.
>>
>>27900635
>I don't like you.
The opinions of an alcoholic don't matter.
>>
>>27900932
They matter more than you and your opinion.
>>
>>27900952
Excuse me, Anon, but I have ten friends on Facebook. How many do you have, loser?
>>
>>27900957
Doesn't matter. Durnk produces green, you don't.
>>
>>27901085
Yes, I do. Just not in RGRE.
>>
>>27901104
Your fantasies of having a prolapsed anus are not enjoyable by anyone other then you.
>>
>Obvious childish bait
>Oblivious childish replies
Never change, /mlp/
>>
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>>27901171
I like this anon.
>>
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>>27901171
>>27901203
I don't. He's a bully :(
You're hurting my feelies Anon, stop.
>>
>>27901104
Post a pastebin and let us see just what kind of greens you make.
>>
Here's a prompt to relieve tension.

>TeenAnon ends up in RGRE
>is put into a high school in Canterlot
>starts going out with TeenCadence
>they fool around as teenagers do, and Cadence gets pregnant.
>BUT unlike in Shuk's story, Cadence takes full responsibility and wants to raise the foal because her parents didn't raise a deadbeat.
>However the strain of a foal on the way negatively impacts their relationship
>>
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>>27901235
>face emote

back to tumbler with you.
>>
>>27901235
>He's a bully
that's why i like him.
>>
>>27901236
>>27901332
http://pastebin.com/JpfKEJPB
pls
>>
PROMPT TIME!

>RGRE Anon vs Tirek
>Celestia realizes the flaw in her plan and gives all the alicorn magic to Anon instead of twilight.
>Tirek tries to convince anon he's doing this to liberate all stallions.
>Anon employs his next level shitposting skills to bait Tirek into a fight.
>Super charged Anon vs full power Tirek.
>>
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>>27901428
>>
>>27901275
Yeah, actually, here's an item for discussion: if the mares are the social equivalent of a man in RGRE, how do they react to being pregnant? Do they hide their morning sickness from their colt because they're supposed to be the strong one in the relationship? When they get moody, do they get told to suck it up?
>>
>>27901407
>Recently you had an interesting life.
Did he just get reborn? How many lives had he lived? The Sentence isn't grammatically sound. You could revise it to:
>Recently your life took new turn.
or
>Your life had recently taken an interesting turn.

And your little blog green, I would say you don't have the thick skin to be a writefag if your response is to lash out at everyone who doesn't agree with you.
>>
>>27901930
Come on, man. How can you not see that "You're hurting my feelies" is ironic? I'm not actually mad/annoyed at any of them, it was a paragraph I wrote in literally five minutes.

Also, it's only 1/2 blog. It includes pony's :^)
>>
>be Putin in equestria
>Russia Happens
>>
>>27901922

That is interesting.

I imagine pregnant mares in RGRE would generally be told to suck it up when they have mood swings.

Being a pregnant mare in RGRE could be something to brag about, considering there would be no doubt of them getting laid. Unlike in IRL where guys can lie and say they aren't virgins when they are.

Morning Sickness as something to be proud of?
>>
>>27901275
>Cadence wants nothing more than to be a mother, though she didn't expect it so soon.
>Insists on doing everything 'proper' though.
>Begins planning the wedding.
>Anon is freaking out, naturally.
>First he's displaced from his life on Earth, now he's gotten his marefriend, who was his emotional rock first and foremost, knocked-up.
>Celestia is one of the few who understands why he's panicking.
>Others don't understand why: he's marrying a goddamn Princess, a hot and kind one to boot.
>He's 'moving up' the societal-ladder.
>His worries and fear are simply dismissed as 'coltish hysteria' and 'nerves'.
>Pressure on him grows as her bump gets bigger, she becomes more clingy/protective, and the wedding date looms closer...
>>
>>27902045

That would be perfect.
>Anon is afraid of his relationship with Cadence moving too fast for his comfort, but Cadence is too eager for the wedding and foal to notice
>Anon unintentionally starts acting like a 'Groomzilla' due to all the stress, reinforcing the outsider view that his worries are just coltish hysteria.
>Celestia tries to be someone he can talk too about his problems, but it isn't quite enough.
>Anon is afraid to bring up the possibility of Cadence getting an abortion because of how eager she is for the foal and wedding.
>>
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>>27901428
>Humans are anti-magical
>He goes against Tirek like a matador or some shit
>Maybe throw a javelin at the fucker?
>Dong ring the fucker is dead
>Ponies start calling Anon edgenames, like "Death Slinger" or "Javelin Killer"
>"But that's what my name actually means!"
>tfw it was Lero all along
>>
>>27902106
>abortion
filth
>>
>>27902153
But what if Cadence wants to have your abortion? What if she wasn't fucked that good since she got her cutie mark?
>>
>>27902153

Hey, I like pregnancy as much as the next Anon but you need to have conflict in a story.
>>
>>27902480
link to full pic?
>>
>>27902499
https://derpibooru.org/1098711
>>
>>27902503
thx
>>
>>27895483
Here's the next part of All for You: http://pastebin.com/m3290Td5
---
>Looking at the fiction shelf, you scoured the titles packed tightly together.
“The Colt from Beyond, How I met your Father, Close Encounters of the Sexy Kind?”
>Okay, despite titles showing that every writer was very sexually repressed, nothing really stood out to you.
>It’s a damn library for god’s sake, there had to be a book here worth reading.
>Moving to the next aisle you continued to peruse mountainous shelves of books.
>Without even looking at the title this time, you grabbed a random book and began flipping through the pages.
>Hoof drawn representation of various plants with their descriptions littered the pages.
>“I never took you for liking horticulture Anon.”
>Your whole body tensed when the soft voice reached your ears.
>There wasn’t a reason to look, you knew exactly who the voice belonged to.
>Don’t turn around Anon, just ignore her and don’t acknowledge her presence. Maybe if you were lucky she’d just go away on her own.
>”Anon?”
>Nope not happening Twilight. Go do your horse things elsewhere.
>”I was really hoping to run into you today you know.”
>The feeling is far from mutual Sparkle, hmm that’s an interesting plant, maybe Celestia could add a few to the garden.
>You always did have a green thumb back home, maybe you could start a little garden of your own.
>”You’re not going to talk to me are you?”
>Bingo. It only took you one minute to figure out, I’m so proud.
>Closing the book and placing it under your arm you turned and walked right past the purple princess, not even sparing her a glance.
>Soft hooffalls echoed behind you as you made your way out of the library.
>”There’s so much I want to say and I know you don’t want to hear any of it, but could you at least let me apologize?”
>>
>>27902519
>Remaining silent you continued towards your room, with any luck you’d be able to settle back in bed without waking Luna.
>”I’m sorry, we’re sorry, we messed up and hurt you.”
>That’s nice, a little too late though.
>Maybe you should go and tell Flash, I’m sure he’d love to hear all about it.
>So maybe that was a low blow, even for you.
>The various guards eyed you both as you passed through the halls, Twilight trying to talk to you, failing, and trying again.
>”I know you herding with the princesses was to get back at us for what we did, but”
>Pure unbridled rage filled you up when she said that, stopping you dead in your tracks.
>A fact that went unnoticed as Twilight walked right into the back of your legs.
“Of all the most self-centered, idiotic, and outright insulting things that you’ve ever said Twilight, that one takes the cake.”
>Turning on your heel you faced the visibly taken aback pony.
“Celestia and Luna were there for me when you all got tired of me.”
>Clenching your fists tightly you felt angrier than you ever remember being in a long time.
“They showed me that not all the ponies were selfish, entitled, and ignorant of others. So don’t think for one second that me being with those that really love me is a way to get back at you.”
>Reel it back Anon, you’re letting her get under your skin.
>Fucking hell! This pony just got you mad though. Resuming your trek back to your room you wanted nothing more than to forget your encounter.

>Tired and sleep deprived you made yer way to the castle.
>The train ride was only supposed to take a couple of hours, but as luck would have it, it broke down about an hour into the trip.
>Stranding you in the middle of nowhere.
>You were sweaty and tired, and wanting nothing more than to take a dip in a nice cool pond.
>>
>>27902523
>But you made it, and if what Twilight told you a few days ago was true you’d be arriving just on time to take Anon back.
>”Halt, state your business.”
>The two guards by the gate crossed their spears as you approached.
“The name’s Applejack, I’m here to see Princess Twilight Sparkle, my herdmate.”
>Both guards regarded your haggard form before casting confused glances at each other.
>Shoot fellas you’re acting like you’ve never seen me here before.
>I’ a dang element of harmony for tarnations sake, saved the place a couple times too.
>”Go on through ma’am.”
>Lifting their spears the two guards finally allowed you entry.
>Walking past the guards you made your way into the castle proper, ready to do whatever you could to help.
>Now all you had to do was track down Twilight or Rainbow.
>With a renewed vigor you trotted into the castle. Your instincts told you that Twilight would probably be around the library.
>As for Rainbow, that mare was just too unpredictable.
>” So don’t think for one second that me being with those that really love me is a way to get back at you.”
>Oh boy that sounded a lot like Anon, and he didn’t seem too happy at all.
>You managed to only see his retreating form as he walked away from Twilight.
>Looks like this was going to be a lot harder than Twilight made it out to be earlier.
>Might as well find out just how bad the situation was.
>Walking to Twilight you noticed several things all at once.
>Her wings were drooping to the ground and she was hunched over, not to mention she was shaking.
>Stepping in front of your herdsister you lifted her downturned face upward with your hoof.
>Tears were freely flowing from her eyes and she looked… broken.
>Bringing her into a hug was when the damn broke and she let out the most heartwrenching sobs.
>>
>>27902536
“There, there, it will be okay.”
>Deep down you were beginning to doubt those words.

”I believe we’ve covered everything on the list of issues you’ve presented.”
>Despite the long morning full of back to back talks, you and Gilda worked your way through the entirety of the items that she was here for.
>Rainbow Dash looked like she would fall asleep at any moment, her head bobbing every few seconds.
>”It appears so, thank you for your patience Princess.”
“Not at all, the relations between our races are extremely important for our mutual growth.”
>That and the sooner you finished the sooner your entourage would be departing, making for some quality for time for you and Anon.
>”Your highness? Would it be alright for Gilda to remain here a bit longer? She’s been so busy she hasn’t even gotten a chance to see the city.”
>Buck.
>Looks like Rainbow was awake enough.
>You couldn’t say no. It wouldn’t look good to just kick out a diplomat the moment business was taken care of.
“Of course, please enjoy yourselves.”
>With a bow the two left you in the vast throne room.
>Looking at your sun you decided it was time for some lunch.
>And maybe you could sneak away for a minute to go see Anon while at it.
>>
>>27902540
All for the time being, I should have one more part either later tonight or early tomorrow.
>>
>>27902540
Those words hurt, Twilight.
>>
>>27902548
Loving it.

Huh... thoughts from discussion on a good Cadence being knocked up in RGRE...

>Cadence finally has a bun shoved in her from her husband.
>They're overjoyed.
>Anon is an acquaintance of theirs visiting the Empire on a long holiday or has emigrated.
>As the pregnancy progresses, Shining grows progressively more wigged out and skittish about everything -- responsibility, etcetera.
>Anon ends up slowly being dragged into being Cadence's support base, which is what Shining was supposed to be.
>Being non-RGRE, Anon's attitudes and 'manning up' accidentally begin to win over Cadence from her husband unofficially.
>When the kid's born with some health issues ("Mutant Heart"), it causes Shining to break.
>Anon steps up to the plate for the kid, and unintentionally becomes her father figure.
>"Daddy..."
"...Well, fuck."
>Epico-clusterfucko.
>>
>>27902601
>"A-anon? Could you pl... would you mind holding <ponekid>? Her heart thing is acting up again."
>You hold the shaking, sputtering filly to your chest, watching the scared foal paw at your chest and your shirt.
>Shining sobs quietly at your side.
>"I'm s-so sorry, Anon... It's s-so hard to w-watch her when she's l-like this."
>You pat him on the shoulder, but he leans away.
>"It's so hard..." he mumbles, more to himself than to you.
>>
>>27902601
I would suck a thousand miles of writefag dick to get a long story made based on this.
>>
>>27902658
Better start at it, then. They won't deliver otherwise :^)
>>
>>27902601
And the worse thing is that Armour can't really blame Anon, even if he does feel jealous and guilty at him.
>>
>>27902707
>>27902645
>>27902601

Why does Shining Armor suffer in every RGRE story he's in?
>>
>>27902815
Cause cadence took his balls and keeps them in a nice tuperware jar.
>>
>>27902815
That's actually a good question, Anon.
>>
>>27898662
Agreed. It was perfect.
>>
>>27902853

>In RGRE, stallions used to magically castrate themselves and give their testicles to their herdmares as a symbol of devotion
>This has mostly fallen out of practice and is considered barbaric and horrifying
>However because the Crystal Ponies are one thousand years behind the rest of Equestria they still do it and forced Shining to do it if he wanted to be recognized as their Prince.
>>
>>27902982
Then how do they impregnate their herdmates?
>>
>>27902986
Willpower
>>
>>27902986

The sperm inside is magically preserved, duh.
>>
>>27902601
LaP wrote something vaguely similar to that on his Fimfiction account. Shame the ending was shit.
>>
>>27903084
Link to LaP FiMfic account, please?
>>
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>>27902982
>castration
>ever
>>
This fucking thread.
>>
>>27903420
Why would you fuck a thread? How would you fucked a thread? Would you go to 4chan's servers and just fuck a server box?
>>
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>>27903217
Don't hate them just because of their culture, Anon.
>>
>>27903668
I want to get politically charged in here. Bring me stories of dirty muslim ponies killing ponies in Canterlot while Celestia scolds her little ponies for calling them "radical extremists"
>>
>>27903794
>Muslimpone beheads stallions and throws lesbian mares of of buildings
>Twilight, nose in the air, repeats "not all muslims" until the words have lost all meaning
>>
>>27903794
>>>/pol/
You can read real life versions of that.
>>
>>27903794
>>27903859
if i wanted reality i'd go outside
>>
>>27903859
>>27903794

>Anon's horsewaifu gets killed by a Muslimpone
>Celestia and Twilight give their condolences but the murderer gets a slap on the wrist
>snaps and goes full Punisher on Saddle Arabian terrorists
>>
>>27903921
Would muslimpone be from saddle arabia? I can't think of a horsepun for muslim
>>
>>27903921
Because race defines your country, the saddle arabians go to war with minotaurs, because that's what they think Anon is.
The minotaurs love war.
>>
>>27903943

Mareslim instead of Muslim?
>>
>"Nonny! Are you alright? That fall looked suuuuuuuper hard!"
"Ugh, I'm good, Penk. Just glad that I didn't break any bones."
>Pinkie stares at you incredulously and laughs
"Oh! Haha, Nonny! Nice joke there! Zing!"
>What
"Uhh, Ponk, last time I checked. There were bones in my bod-"
>The pink mare grabs your face, squeezing your cheeks together before you can finish your sentence
>"Nonny, stop. Skeltals are serious business. You can't just go around willy-nilly saying there's bones inside you!"
>You think you lost a few brain cells listening to that
"Pinks."
>"Are you going to tell me you learned your lesson, Nonny?"
"Why do you think my face is kinda hard when you hold onto it?"
>"I know the answer to that, Silly! It's obviously because there's-"
>In less than a second, Pinkie's face went pale
>"-hard things underneath, like b-b-bones."
"Yeah, now stop messing around an-"
>"AAAAAAAAAAHHH WHAT ARE YOU?!"
"I'm just a regular person. Penka."
>Pinkie starts shaking her head so fast it becomes a blur
>"NONONONONO! Y-YOU'RE SOME KIND OF WEIRD S-SKELETON AND MAN HYBRID! LIKE A, A...umm-"
"Like a regular man?"
>"NO! LIKE, LIKE, A SKELETON MAN!"
>Her babbling continues until she's just spouting gibberish
>OK, this has gone on for long enough
>You pick up Pinkie, who is still screaming, up by a hoof and
>Wait
>What, the, fuck
>It's like gripping a pillow
>Is there really nothing supporting all this mass?
>You squeeze the limb, and your fingers sink in all the way
>A toy-like squeak also accompanied the action
>Today was a "ADHD is going out of hand and I can't focus on writing" day
>>
>>27902148
There's only one way this can end.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=kmvPLtawtKc
>>
>>27903949

>Saddle Arabians lose the war and get conquered by the Minotaurs
>Minotaurs send Anon a letter thanking him for the opportunity to go to war again
>He's welcome in their country anytime.
>>
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>>27903977
80's Grace Jones was so hot. There's one horse she reminds me of.
>>
>>27903961
Need more plox

>>27903953
Very nice.
>Stallion visits Mareslime shithole
>Gets acid thrown on him for being out of his hijab
>Twilight, the biggest and most obnoxious stallionist around ("stare-rape!" "Mare-spreading!" "Starting a conversation with a stallion is sexual harassment!") nervously turns her back on the injured stallion for fear of being labelled a racist
>>
>>27904018

>The rest of the Mane Six lose all respect for Twilight and their friendship rapidly deteriorates.
>Her reputation is in the toilet
>Harmony is broken, but Celestia still refuses to deal with the Saddle Arabians.
>Luna forms a top secret black-ops squad to fight the threats that Celestia refuses to.
>>
>>27904071
>Celestia gets up on the podium, ready to address the angry masses
>"If-if-if-if-if-if a bunch of..... okie doke.... just because, you know, it sounds funny or the tweets are provocative"
>>
>>27904141

Nah, Celestia wouldn't be Obama. She'd be more like the German government
>>
>>27904222
>Iron will would be trump
>>
>>27889513
There's a thread for that.
>>
>>27904254

This is RGRE. The Trump equivalent would have to be female.

Luna would see the current state of affairs and find it disgraceful. VOTE BEST PRINCESS.
>>
>>27904222
>"Ahmed! Not now!"
>A dirty, emancipated stallion with a disgusting beard and a unibrow sadly dismounts Celestia and pulls his tiny penis out of her ponut
>The very same penis that had taken his 4 year old daughter's virginity
>>
>>27904291
this is Equestria, where gender roles are reversed; it'd rather be the mares marrying 10 year old colts due to "mah culture".
>>
>>27904300

>Twilight forces Spike to marry a dirty Saddle Arabian mare she's sheltering in her house.
>>
>>27903961
anybody want to continue with this? it sounds pretty good but im a shit writer.
>>
>>27904390
>Twilight looks down at Spike, his poor body beaten and bloody
>The Saddle Arabian, who had never bothered to learn Equish, yells at the barely-conscious Spike.
>"Well, what did you do to make her angry?"
>A sharp whistle makes Twilight jump, and the Saddle Arabian walks out of the room.
>Her big pot full of water was finally boiling.
>>
>>27904618

>The other Mane Six find out and tattle to Celestia
>while Celestia is unwilling to have the Saddle Arabian arrested she does recognize what happened to Spike is serious child abuse, causing him to be removed from Twilight's care.
>>
>>27902540
Time to finish this.
---
>Bucking Applejack, why did she have to come now? If she screwed up the plan you wouldn’t let her live it down.
>But your anger would have to wait, there were bigger issues at hoof.
>Right now you had a visibly distraught Twilight on your hooves.
“So what happened?”
>You and Gilda were getting ready to go fly around Canterlot and stretch your wings a bit when the farm pony came into your room with Twilight strung across her back.
>”Not entirely sure Rainbow, I heard Anon say something about not being with the Princesses as a way to get back at ‘er and then this.” She motioned to the silent Twilight.
>Oh jeez, Twilight probably said something that blew up in her face big time.
>Twilight lay motionless on your bed, the only indication that she was still alive was her slow rise and fall of her chest.
>Her eyes had this far away look, like your pops used to say “Lights are on but nopony’s home”.
>So much for your little day of flying around.
>”Is she going to be okay?”
>Gilda despite her normal aloof demeanor did look concerned about Twilights well-being.
>”I hope so, but until she snaps out of it we won’t know for sure.”
>It wasn’t supposed to be like this.
>You were supposed to apologize and make up with Anon.
>Things were supposed to get better, not worse.

>Something was terribly wrong.
>When you went to go see Anon you found him in the recliner in your room.
>And by you, did he look mad.
“Anonymous is everything alright?”
>Despite what was definitely anger, you could tell it wasn’t directed at you.
>”I’m not sure. I ran into Twilight this morning.”
>>
>>27904792
>That would explain the anger part. Your student had that affect on some.
“I’m going to take a guess and say it didn’t go well.”
>”You could say that again. I’m not going to repeat what she said, but I think the best course of action to end this, isn’t going to have a happy ending for everyone.”
>Fear gripped your heart, the way he said that made you fear the worst.
>Was he going to leave you?
>No! He wouldn’t, he loved you and your sister. You wanted to scream for him to not leave you.
>He wouldn’t.
>Almost as if sensing your inner turmoil Anon rose from his chair and crossed the distance between you both in an instant.
>His hands engulfed you into a hug which you eagerly returned.
>Moving your head into the crook of his neck you tried to contain your emotions.
“Please don’t leave us.”
>You don’t know how long the hug lasted but you didn’t let go, you couldn’t.
>The fear that it would be the last was just too great.
>”Whoever said that I was leaving, you silly pony?”
>Feeling his lips gently press against your own you relaxed.
>That simple kiss eased some of the fear in your heart.
“I was scared, I thought you”
>”Like it or not you’re stuck with me.”
>The perfect moment between the two of you was broken by a particularly loud snore from a still sleeping Luna.
>Giggling you hugged Anon just a bit harder.
“So what do we do now?”
>”I’m going to put an end to this tonight. Would you mind letting Twilight and Rainbow know to meet me in the garden tonight?”
>Nodding you finally let your human go.
>>
>>27904805
>”It would mean a lot to me if you and Luna could be there as well.”
“Of course.”

>These silly ponies were going to drive you to molt early.
>Seriously you thought that Rainbow was joking when she initially came to you for help in getting her mate back.
>But now you knew lot more than what she divulged. They went and drove their mate away, and for what?
>Another male who was as flighty as a chicken and didn’t even stick around either.
>Despite feeling the need to smack her upside her head, she was still your friend, and you helped your friends.
>No matter how scatterbrained they were when it come to important decisions.
>Doing what they had done in the gryphon culture would be unheard of.
>Mating was for life, these ponies didn’t know how good they had it.
>And the human was a perfect mate from everything you’ve heard.
>Strong, intelligent, and family oriented, the kind of mate you could bring home to mom.
>Any gryphoness would start a war if so much as another even looked at him in a way that displeased.
>Ponies eesh.
>A sudden knocking on the door got your attention, it caught everyone’s attention.
>A magic glow encased the door handle and slowly the door opened to reveal…
“Your highness?”
>”Good Afternoon Gilda, I’m sorry to interrupt but there is something urgent I need to pass on to.. hello Applejack, I wasn’t aware that you were here as well.”
>”Good Afternoon Princess, I just got here earlier.”
>”Then you should hear this as well.”
>Looks like this wasn’t a social call.
>>
>>27904815
>”Anonymous would like to see all of you tonight in the garden. He will meet you there just after the moon is raised.”
>With that the Princess left.
>Never again would you let your friends drag you into their emotional drama.
>Two of the three mares shared a look, while Princess Twilight remained just as motionless as before.

>To think a year ago, you were in a happy relationship with three mares who you thought truly loved you.
>You were happy, you thought they were happy.
>But that illusion was shattered.
>Moving on was hard, but you did. But them coming back into to your life was threatening to ruin what little happiness you had left.
>And now you had to do the right thing and nip the problem in the bud. Once and for all.
>A look towards the horizon showed the last few rays of the sun and the rising moon.
>Not much longer now.
>Sitting down in the grass you relaxed before the inevitable confrontation.
>The soft night breeze swept past you, rustling the blades of grass around you.
>The rich smell of the various flowers of the garden permeated your senses, almost calming you.
>The noise of approaching ponies caught your attention and brought you back to reality.
>From where you sat you clearly saw all of them approaching.
>Luna and Celestia on one side, Twilight, Rainbow, and Applejack?
>When did she get here?
>Shaking your head you focused on what you were about to do.
>Soon all them stood before you, well it was time to do this.
>Standing up you regarded all of them.
“Girls, we need to settle things here, once and for all.”
>”Anon before you begin can I say something?”
>>
>>27904820
>Twilight looked pretty rough, but pleading look on her face was enough to let her have her say.
“Yeah, go ahead.”
>”I’m sorry for what I said earlier, it was way out of line.”
“I can respect that Twilight.”
“ There are things that I need to say, and all I ask is that you listen and let me say my peace.”
>All the ponies nodded in unison.
“You three did something bad, I understand that this world is different, the customs here are different. But I never expected that I would be just cast away.”
>Each member of your old herd cast their gaze down. Your words hit them hard.
“That hurt, and now you three come back and want things to go back to the way things were before.”
“I’m sorry, but there’s no going back. I’m happy here now. I believe you all are really sorry for what happened, but the trust we shared is gone.”
>Taking a moment you organized your thoughts.
“Celestia and Luna have shown me that they love me for me, and the only thing I can ask is that you respect that decision.”
>There it is, you said it all.
>The two alicorns moved and engulfed you with their wings in a big hug.
>”We are sorry Anon, and there’s no part of me that wouldn’t go back and change what we did. But I’m an honest mare, if this is what you want I can respect that.”
>Good old Applejack. She always was the more levelheaded one.
>Yet the tears at the edges of her eyes betrayed her words.
>Rainbow however didn’t look at all happy, her eyes showed anger and hurt.
>”Buck you Anon!” She screamed before taking off, a rainbow trailing behind her through the sky.
>Turning to Twilight, you waited for her response to this.
>”So I guess this is goodbye then.” ::Sniffle:: “I can’t blame you, we’ve been horrible.”
“Twilight, Applejack come here.”
>>
>>27904826
>With a knowing glance to both your marefriends you left their embrace and stepped towards the young alicorn and farmpony.
>Without hesitation you engulfed both in a hug.
“Just because we’re not together anymore doesn’t mean we can’t rebuild some of the bonds we shared.”
“It’s not going to be easy and it won’t happen overnight, but if you both and maybe even Rainbow are willing to try, we can.”

>”Sometimes I wonder just how many of my little ponies are affected by you simply being here.”
>Lifting the comforter you raised an eyebrow at Celestia’s statement.
>”My sister is right, ever since you arrived we simply gravitate towards you.”
“Must be my winning personality.”
>The sisters let out a cheerful laugh at that.
>”Oh I’m sure it’s exactly that.”
“So my handsome looks then?”
>”You’re cute, but not that cute.”
>Settling into bed you were joined on either side by two warm bodies.
>Pressing themselves against you, you felt their soft fur against your bare skin.
>”I truly hope that things do get better for Twilight and her herd. They truly looked repentant for their actions.”
>Twilight and Applejack, you could repair some of the bridges that were burned. Rainbow however was the wildcard.
>She always had a personality that was prone to acting first and dealing with ramifications later.
>But you would give her a chance if she wanted it.
>As the lights in your room dimmed you wrapped your arms around the two princesses.
“Goodnight girls.”
>”Goodnight Anonymous.” They both responded in unison.
>>
>>27904832
And it's done. http://pastebin.com/m3290Td5
>>
>>27904826
>All that to try and get him back.
>Things are settled with two lines.

Man, and I thought I'd seen lazy writing before.
>>
>>27904071
>You look down at the five former Elements of Harmony
>Applejack
>Rainbow Dash
>Pinkie Pie (mane straight and not a smile in sight)
>Fluttershy (for once she doesn't look scared, just sad)
>Rarity
"Merry mares, it's up to us. Mine sister hast grown craven and impotent and shall do nothing to curb the monsters that threaten our ways of life."
>You nod to Anon in the corner of the room - he hasn't said very much since ponywaifu had been tickled and booped in a cowardly Saddle Arabian terrorist attack.
>The mares in the room sadly shake their heads as he pass.
>Pinkie reaches a hoof out to him, but Rarity holds her back.
"Twilight Sparkle may be content to turneth her back on thine brothers and fathers, but it is time for us to unleash what were once considered crimes of war."
>Fluttershy, unexpectedly, is the first one to recognize what you were talking about.
>"N-not...!"
"Yes. Itching powder. We art sorry, Kindness and Loyalty, but 'tis for the safety of our country that thou must fly above their airspace and distribute thine cargo."

>You are Anon
>You're here to collect your waifu from the hospital.
>Apparently being tickled for more than a minute or two here constitutes as "cruel and unusual punishment"
>Some mare with a towel on her head (it was a dish towel with a nice floral pattern) tickled a bunch of mares and stallions a few days ago, and they've yet to get up.
>They're very clearly not asleep - you can see them peeking at you and giggling when they think you aren't looking.
>Everyone's acting like it's something horrifying that happened or why everyone hates Twilight and Celestia now.
>>
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>>27904832
>you will never
>>
>>27904832
Good story but you ended it too quickly. The buildup to gathering everyone (and bringing Gilda in as a foreign representative) was kind of wasted when you had exactly 1 confrontation with Anon and then ended the story.
>>
>>27904884
>>They're very clearly not asleep - you can see them peeking at you and giggling when they think you aren't looking.
Ohhh no, my heart
>>
>>27904884
>>Everyone's acting like it's something horrifying that happened or why everyone hates Twilight and Celestia now.
Fuck it, close enough.

>>27904832
I liked what you did with the idea, but it looks a bit like you just dropped it in the end.
>>
>>27889464
Can I redo this picture? I can't color it but I hope someone could do me a solid though
>>
>>27904948
This thread needs some good feels.

I'll bet Anon feels weird dating a pony in marshmallow ponyland. They're adults, sure, but they have the maturity of a 12 year old (if they're lucky). He probably feels like his waifu's dad half the time.
>>
>>27904884
KEEP GOING PLUGGO
>>
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>>27905022
It'd be like dating a bubbly airhead.
>>
>>27905090
UH UH OKAY

>>27904884
>With one list thrust of your tongue, you sign your name on the form.
>Dropping the pen in between your teeth, you turn to your newest long-term case.
>Ponewaifu.
>She was at ground zero of a horrible terrorist attack.
>Some Saddle Arabian (you call them sand ziggers when nopony else is around) monster started tickling mares and stallions alike in the middle of a crowded park.
>Ponewaifu was ticked for a whole minute-and-a-half before the sand zigger could be apprehended.
>She was released with a slap on the hooves.
>ThanksCelestia.png
>Her coltfriend, Anonymous, has stayed by her side for the whole entire day that she's been here.
>Well, except for that part where Princess Luna wanted to talk to him, but he was back within half an hour.
>You can't imagine what he's going through.
>Who will provide for him?
>Who will keep all the other mares from doing things like rubbing up against his thigh, or bugging him to give them snacks and ear scritches?
>And here he is.
>Holding her unresponsive hoof.
>You've caught him petting her mane a few hours ago, and you nearly cried when he started reading her favourite bedtime stories to her.
>Your heart goes out to him for being so strong.

>You are Anon
>Ponewaifu licks her lips and smiles sweetly as you feed her another piece of her favorite snack - dried up pieces of fruit.
>Today you brought mangos and pineapple.
>She's lying on the hospital bed, "unconscious", with her hooves folded over her eyes.
>You can't tell if she's trying to hide from you or if the overhead lamps are just too bright; she does this almost every morning when the sun reaches her side of the bed.
"Are you nearly ready to go?"
>She shakes her head.
>"No. My tummy is still real tingly from being tickled."
>>
>>27889516
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=V92OBNsQgxU
>>
>>27905373
Whoops. That was supposed to bed Redheart in the beginning.
>>
>>27905449
>bed
fuck
I think it's time for me to go to sleep.
>>
>>27903961
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9u_v9H24PfY
>>
>>27903961
More please
>>
>>27904832
Ya flubbed the ending. Badly.
>>
>>27905449
I wouldn't mind doing that :^)
>>
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A pony will loudly neigh for you if she can't find you.
>>
>>27905888
trips demands green! That's the most adorable thing I've heard in a long time.
>>
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>>27905449
Oh, I'd bed Redheart all right.
>>
>Ponies get excited when you offer them snacks
>>
>>27905888
gotta do green of this in the morning when I'm sober
someone remind me
>>
>>27904222
pls do not compare sexiest waifu Celestia to that fucking cunt Merkel.
>>
>>27906150
can the neighing pony be Luna for maximum loud?
>>
>>27904267
>>
>>27904832
Wow, that felt so unsatisfying.
Like eating an ice cream float but there's no ice cream.
You really copped out.
But, although it could have been better, you did take the time to write for us.
So, thank you.
>>
bamp
>>
>>27904854
>it's done
Such a rare statement in the world of >green
Thx Chopper.
>>
>>27905597
All this bitching because Anon ended the situation like a mature, civil person. I guess people just don't want a realistic ending.
>>
>>27907499
were not mature and civil here anon. we either want blood (for the edgy), sex (for the lustfull) and some other thing i cant remember.
>>
>So much green so many prompts such /pol/ wow

>>27894116
>>>Mm, outside of mentions in conversation Luna's prob gonna sit the rest of this one out.

Hahaha, this is actually a lie and I'm a huge faggot please fuck my face.
>>
>>27907589
Keks.
We need our keks.
>>
>>27907705
blood, sex and keks.
nice.
>>
>>27904832
I liked it. And I liked the ending. Frankly I don't get why people are criticizing it. This was the kind of story that could have gone on forever, with them trying to get Anon back and him avoiding confrontation. Only it did have to end, and I think it ended the right way: Anon made clear that he wouldn't come back, but actually forgave them and left the door open for future reconciliation. We also got a cute ending scene with the sisters. I'm happy with it. Thanks for the story.
>>
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>>27905961
I'm sure.
>>
>>27907902
>the green that spawned that picture was never finished
Fuck, I miss those threads.
>>
>>27907760
dont forget feels
>>
>>27908123
Feels can be used in all story.
Blood, sex and kek are the three mains.
>>
>>27908169
Blood?
>>
>>27908172
>>27907760
>>
>>27908172
>Anon in vampire ponyville
>Vampire ponies all want to suck his blood
>Human blood is the tastiest of all
>But there is only one human, and the only blood that has come from him is going to the medical and science ponies, who are not permitted to consume it.
>The vamponies try all manner of schemes to get a drink of that blood
>None have succeeded yet
>But it would be unmarely to just give up.
>They will just have to try harder.
>>
>>27907499
Anon you little faggot I wanted to see Anon send his old herd to jail on trumped-up rape charges.
>>
>>27907873
The ending was fine, it was all that build that was for nothing is what people are upset about. Why have a scene where Applejack puts her foot town and goes to Canterlot to confront Anon if the story ends immediately after Anon talks to Twilight? What was the point of Rainbow Dash making a desperate fly to the gryphons so that she could bring Gilda in if she ends up saying exactly one line to Anon? For all the desperation his old herd felt to get him back, Anon's confrontation was two or three sentences with Twilight and then they hugged. It was a proper ending and having the story go endlessly on would have sucked, but goddamn this is like in LaP's story if everything up until Anon jacks off Rarity's horn happened, but then instead he walks up to the gym, asks the stallions to leave, they say "okay, sure" and the story ends.

It's like planning to go to the camping, getting all your friends organized and booking the weekend off from work, getting the supplies, picking out a nice place by a lake.... then getting out of your car, roasting one single marshmallow, and then going home. I really fucking liked the marshmallow, but what was the point of getting my friends together and booking time off of work if that's all I was going to do?
>>
>>27908219
I hate camping.
>>
>>27908224
How ironic, considering that Rarity is the most marshmallow-ey pony.
>>
>>27908224
Camping a shit.
>>
>>27908231
I don't have to go camping to enjoy marshmallows.
>>
>>27908224
>>27908296
I knew I shouldn't have put in that camping thing.
>>
>>27908296
So you're saying you wouldn't roast that marshmallow?
>>
I pop in on occassion but I still don't get it because I are dumb.

Is this basically the stallions are the women, and the mares are the men?
>>
>>27908452
Sure why not.
>>
>>27908452
That's the basic idea, but it mostly boils down to an Anon from our world dealing with it.
>>
>>27908452
Just about.

Stallions
>spa trips
>gossip
>worry about whether their manestyle is in fashion or not

Mares
>work in construction
>gather around to drink beer and talk about testicles
>brag about the time they bagged a stallion who licked their pussy whenever she wanted him to
>>
>>27908452
There are different ways to interpret. We can have stallions are basically full blown girly to just them being the ones not wearing the pants. Same with mares being the ones who could be that suave moustache-y cop who oozes testosterone, to just them having to deal with men problems.
>>
>>27908190
Then they taste Human Cum and vecome
Succuponies
>>
So I just got back and read the responses. I expected the there would be people that felt let down. But the idea I was going for was the time crunch, Gilda appearing was only about buying the old herd a little more time.

For those that did enjoy it,thanks for reading.

To those that didn't like how quickly I ended it, I am sorry that you didn't enjoy it. I'm nowhere near being a good writefag so if another writer wants to take a crack at it they can, my version doesn't have to be the only way the story ends.
>>
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>>27908550
>vecome
Not only they become succuponies but get Dracula's accent.
>>
>>27905373

I love you, Analplug.

Please sir, can I have some more? Perhaps in the form of a full blown story?
>>
>>27905373
I can only imagine Bombshell being ponewaifu.
That's exactly how she would act.
>>
>>27908577
I need a rgre story about this oc, like
>vampone tries to suck Anon blood while seducing him
>Anon think she wants the D, he tries to give her the D
>Meanwhile stalions think she is trying tô rape him
>they cockblock him all the time trying tô save his purity.
>rgre happens
>>
>>27908775
But Anon, that's Lilith - a succubus.
>>
>>27908839
Even better then
>lilith tries to get the HMD, so she tries to seduce him usig all her experience with previous stalions
>Anon NOTICE that she wants the D, he tries to give her the D
>Meanwhile stalions think she is trying tô rape him
>they cockblock him all the time trying tô save his purity.
>rgre happens
>>
>>27908925
except lillith can and will sprout her own HHD at the drop of a hat.
>>
>>27905373
I guess we're using "Ponewaifu" for every waifu pony we don't have a name for? I like it.
>>
>>27905888
>be anon
>be inna equestria supermarket
>fucking dropped
>this jar of pickles, that is
>you look over to what startled you
>a little colt in the middle of the aisle with tears in his eyes
>"neeeeeeeeeeeeigh!"
>"neeeeeeeeeeeeeigh!"
>you start to head over to him when you hear the sound of hooves galloping on tile
>a white stallion with an orange mane skids around the corner and into the aisle
>"neeeeeeeeeeeeeigh!"
>you can't believe your eyes
>multi hoof drifting!
>he bolts over to the colt and wraps him in a hug
>"There there son, it's okay," he says
>"I was so scared dad!" the colt sobs, "I turned the corner and t-then you weren't theeeere!"
>"I'm here now, it's alright." says the stallion, as the colt finally calms down
>you smile at the scene before you
>the Kodak moment over, you resume your shopping
>you reach for another jar of pickles
"You're mine this time, you delicious bastards"
>"NEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEIGH!"
>>
>>27908925
You guys are making it hard
>Succuponie tries to get the HHD, so she tries to seduce him usig all her experience with previous stalions (and dracula accent)
>Anon NOTICE that she wants the D, he tries to give her the D
>Meanwhile stalions think she is trying to rape him
>they cockblock him all the time trying to save his purity.
>rgre happens
>>
>>27908555
You're a pretty good writefag, if not, I wouldn't even care about your story. It was just that I expected more.
>>
>>27908983
No, it's gotta be
>Succupone from Transylmanea tries to seduce Anon for the HMD
>Anon is a vampire, but also a vampire hunter
>He NOTICES that she wants the Vampire Hunter D but he thinks she's a vampire, so that's a no go
>Anon tries to suck her blood / kill her but stallions think that she's trying to rape him
>They stakeblock him all the time trying to save his purity
>Succupone and Anon starve to death
>RGRE funeral
>>
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>>27908980
>aaahahahaha yeah, I know what you sayin
>>
>>27909024
Thats dark dude
>>
>Ponies like hugs and cuddling
>To them there's a difference between "I want a rutting" cuddles and "I feel like being close to you" cuddles
>Anon cannot tell the difference
>Cue awkward moments when stallions platonically cuddle with Anon, making Anon feel very uncomfortable
>>
>>27909210
>inb4 "go to homo horse"
I just want a story about cuddles, man.
>>
>>27908961
>Another concept character designed with a fundamental misunderstanding of the purpose of succubi

What else is new?
>>
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>>27908492
>work in construction
What, like carpentry and stuff?
>>
I am still accepting story suggestions.
>>
>>27909408
Not sure if you saw this one or not, it got swept up in other stuff.
>>27892196
>>
>>27909408
anon trying to get into nightmare moons metaphorical horse pants when she shows up in ponyville
>>
>>27909419
I did. it's on my list of possibles.
>>
>>27909408
Trixie tries to gather a herd specifically to woo Anon

The cutie mark crusaders get advice from their various sister-figures on how to get a stallion to like you. They try it out on Anon, and get mixed results. Anon struggles with his urges about the cmc, who are legal in horse land, but still so young he feels weird about it.

Anon is a high society guy, being counted by the ambassadors of the griffons, minotaurs, diamond dogs, and dragons. Celestia is trying to get him to get them all in a herd, for the sake of international relations.
>>
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>>27909408
Cuddling with large-teated strong mares.
>>
>>27909408
Oblivious secretary Anon
>>
>>27903961
>>"NO! LIKE, LIKE, A SKELETON MAN!"
>your years of internet training takes over.
"you wanna get spooked fucboi?"
>the citizens of ponyville were treated to the sight of anon chasing pinkie down the street with a trumpet.
>>
>>27904071
>>
>>27909425
This is a good idea. Maybe she starts off unresponsive, but once Anon inevitably succeeds in getting her into bed she tries to be dominant only to succumb to the HMD.
>>
>>27909435
Hey Shukaku, reading through your zombie shenanigans series and I have a question. Is Anon a living zombie or a dead one?
>>
>>27909672
I don't know. I would think Infected, like L4D, since that's always been my zombie game.
>>
>”Is that him? The weird monkey guy?”
>”So is it true they gave him a free pass on the physical endurance test for the spot?”
>The other firefighter mares tried to act polite whenever you were within earshot.
>Yet the moment they thought you were gone the gossip began.
>Constant talk of how the only reason you made it through the rigorous firefighter exams was because you were a stallion.
>Never mind the fact that you blew almost all the previously held scores clearly out of the water.
>But you weren’t going to tell them that.
>”Anon, my office now.”
>And there was the chief.
>An old burly mare who’s been a firefighter longer than anyone could remember.
“Yes chief.”
>Closing the door behind you, you sat in the far too small seat right in front of her desk.
>”I’m going to be blunt with you, I don’t want you here. As far as I’m concerned you being here is nothing more than a PR stunt by the mayor’s office.”
>At least she was honest.
>”So here’s how this is going to work, whenever we get a call you ride with us and stay on the wagon. I’ll be damned if I get a flank-chewing because some colt got his hooves covered in soot.”
“But I don’t have hooves chief.”
>”Then whatever it is you call those grabber of yours. Now shut up, as I was saying, stay in the wagon. If someone needs something help them out. Now get out.”
“Yes chief.”
>Fucking hell, damn back asswards ponies.
>So you were a guy, dick and all, but damn. You wanted to do something to help.
>And what do you get? An assignment as the resident bitch boy.
>Fire stations bell rung throughout, with it the scramble began.
>At least you were going to your first call.
>>
>>27909806
Yes, please. I already like the premise.
>>
>>27905888
>Celestia's neighs echo throughout Canterlot.
"Fucks sake, I was just in the can!""
>>
>>27909830
I'm just throwing the idea out there. Might do one or two things Anon deals with, but not a full green.
>>
>>27909408
sort of
>>27909519
>CMC are legal in horseland, but Anon does not want
>CMC ask their respective mentors for advice on attracting Anon to form a herd
>Shenanigans ensue
>>
>>27909854
It's too late Heli, you can't use your name when posting a prompt, now you have to write it.
>>
>>27909844
>Ponies, being inherently magic, can unconsciously/subconsciously detect other pony's magic.
>When they can't detect another pony nearby, they think they're alone.
>As a result, most ponies have object permanence similar to that of a baby when it comes to Anon
>Ponies get distressed when Anon leaves the room and "disappears"
>Anon often walks into a room full of clingy, upset ponies

>"I thought you were dead!"
"Twilight, I was in the bathroom for five minutes."
>>
>Equestria at war.
>Fighting is brutal beyond measure.
>Anon barred from service due to penis.
>Enemy breaks main line and heads straight to Canterlot.
>Anon pulls an 'Independence Day' moment, using a Wright Brothers' type of flying machine to crash into the enemy to halt their advance to his home.
>Sings this as he crashes.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=o9vDxiMLRTM
>>
>>27909869
That's why I tend not to use it, I always forget to take it off.

---
>Three wagons and one ambulance cart.
>Every single firefighter on duty was there including a couple of paramedics.
>For a single cat stuck in a tree.
>You would go and help, but…
>You had been ordered to stay on the wagon, so that’s exactly what you did.
>”Chief if we can get two ladders on the far side we can distract”
>”Just get it done girls, if he falls I’ll drop you off the roof of the firehouse myself to see if you land on all four hooves.”
>”YES CHIEF!!” You heard the simultaneous chorus as the mares rushed ladders in hoof.
”Hey chief?”
>”Shut up Anon! Were a little busy at the moment.”
>Okay then.
>You were going to say that you could literally walk up to the tree and reach and grab the cat.
>For gods sake the tree was barely six feet tall.
>But orders are orders.
>You watched with interest as the firefighter set multiple ladders against the poor tree.
>Yeah nothing wrong could come of this.
>”OW!! He scratched me!”
>”Medic!!!”
>Maybe you had some granola bars in your field bag to snack on while you wait.
>>
>>27909908
>forget to take it off
Don't you just.... NOT type it in the "Name" field?
>>
>>27909908
>”OW!! He scratched me!”
>”Medic!!!”
>>
>>27909919
It stays there until you post without it.
>>
>>27909942
Not with a scriptblocker it doesn't.
>>
>>27909953
I'm assuming most people don't use it.
>>
>>27909806
>>27909908
This is really good.

I'd love to see more!
>>
>>27909024
>Vampire Hunter D.
kek
>>
>>27909889
More.
>>
>>27909408

How about a Herd vs Herd battle?
We put the Mane 6 vs their arch-nemesis, which are great friends with him.
The battles happend behind Anon's back, just to not involve a stallion in this honorable fight.
Each trial is to prove the wits, strength, knowledge, cunning, wealth, marelyness and libido.
All to make the perfect and most powerful herd of all of equestria.
The trials are silly, but meaningful for the ponies.
Anon thinks they are just silly.
The fights are interrumted by Anon doing silly things with the not in trial herd ponies.
>>
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>>27908620
D'aww, oh you. Pic related just for you. Let me see what I can rustle up.

>>27908627
Bombshell is top waifu material.

>>27908979
Basically. Given how prophetic pony names can be, I wouldn't be surprised if "Ponewaifu" was born over two decades before Anon ever appeared in Equestria.

>>27909408
Ooh, legit? What about Anon trying to make a living by making pony things but accidentally does a lewd?
>Anon knits socks to sell; has many buyers, but gets mean looks when they find his foal-sized socks
>Anon uses his carpentry skills to make wooden rocking horses, not realizing the implications
>>
Hey, i remember there were cozy stories about rgre and they are pretty cozy and i think they are prego, but it's just a cloudy though. i don't remember.
Anyone have the pastebin of that?.
>>
>>27910051
We'll give you the link when you stop namefagging without a purpose.
>>
>>27909408
Reposting this
>Minotaurs mostly consist of a hunter society
>Labyrinthia is smack dab in the center of monster land, and trained minos are often tasked to eliminate any "issues" that are bothering with the general populace
>Although males tend to take up more domestic roles(Taking care of the family, cooking, etc.), it isn't uncommon to see a bull in a hunting group every once in a while
>Anon, a part of the hunting guild, is tasked with taking several ambassadors from Canterlot on a hunting trip to show them the "Wonders of Minos culture"
>Sexist pones do sexist pone things and Anon has to save their asses on several occasions
>>
>>27909965
>”Did you see what he’s wearing, what a slut”
”Scorch shut your mouth, don’t ruin this for me.”
>Anon the newest firefighter was in the kitchen, it was his turn to cook dinner.
>Wearing only shorts and a shirt.
>Unf!
>That colt knew what he was doing, you’d put your bits on it.
>He was teasing you all, wearing those slutty clothes.
>Or bending over whenever he checked on the food in the oven, the clothes hugging him in all the right places
>And smiling whenever he caught you staring and telling you “it wouldn’t be too much longer.”
>Licking the spoon clean after he tasted something he was cooking.
>His tongue darting out and…
“I..I I’m going to check and make sure the gear room is organized.”
>”But I just did that an hour ago.”
“I need to make sure it’s all up to my standards.”
>”Do you want an extra hoof?”
“NO!”
>>
>>27910051
>>27910066

Sorry, i don't enter 4chan a lot.
Not happening Again.
>>
>>27910015
Twilight vs Trixie
Rainbow vs Lightning Dust
Applejack vs ?
Fluttershy vs ?
Rarity vs ?
Pinkie vs ?
>>
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>>27910102
>>
>>27910127
AppleJack vs PearlJack
Fluttershy vs daring doo
Pinkie pie vs Arianne
>>
>>27910180
I know Daring Do but who're the other two?
>>
>>27909408
I suggest more stories from the Amazon Celestia world. That was some top tier green.
>>
>>27910180
its spelled "aryanne"

who's Pearljack?
>>
Time for green!
>>
>>27910345
no u
>>
>So Equesteria... it was weird
>Everything was backwards, at least, to you
>It was nice though, sort of
>You were never a strong guy, more on the slender side of the androgyny scale
>It transferred over to when you arrived into this land
>But it was increased
>...And you were a pony now
>Thing is, everyone else knew you were different because of your 'smell', apparently
>Also you wore clothes all the time
>Had to get those specially made from some place north of you by a posh bitch
>You can't remember her name, but she was incredibly annoying, and incredibly...
>Well... perverse
>That in itself wasn't too bad, it was just odd because you were a horse now
>Having a massive sack and meaty shlong almost as big as you was really disorientating
>Something the white lass reminded you of every few seconds as she took measurements
>To be fair it was kind of nice
>But you wondered how it would pan out in the long run
>The world here was in a sort of 1930's era in how people carried themselves, with the men being in the position of women back home
>So it was going to be... interesting
>That's one word you can describe it with

>Yeah... So, day... 6? You think?
>You don't remember, days have been long and tiring
>Day 1, you were found in a field, naked (of course that was normal here), surrounded by the burnt remains of whatever you'd 'landed' on, and near dead, according to the pony doctors
>You'd actually felt fine but they were saying your vitals had almost flatlined
>Whatever it was, you got out there pretty soon, before news of your sudden appearance got you a meeting with their royalty
>They were very kind, you liked the dark blue one, she was a moody girl
>They sent you to a small backwater called Hoofton
>Something about 'the elements would be too overbearing'
>Whatever that meant
>Now, what you really didn't like, was how they sent you to some shithole community-house
>But... beggars can't be choosers, it was a roof over your head
>It had been a novel first day
>>
>>27910127
Shy vs Derpy
AJ vs Carrot top
Pinkie vs Bon
>>
>>27910427
Are you writing as you go?
>>
>>27910318
An oc I saw but cant find the pic anymore, sorry guys
*she and Apple hate Each Other Because of their fruitsmarks
>>
>>27910427
>Again, it had been very odd
>The stallions were going about and passing you some concerning looks that a gay guy might throw at another gay guy if they were competing over another gay guy they fancied
>The mares looked at you like you were a lamb, and they were wolves
>So that was a thing
>Your 'home' within this lot, was a small, dingy, and barely larger than a standard broom closet
>It was simply a place to sleep, all that fit in here was a bed and a nightstand
>Everything else was shared
>Public bathrooms, restrooms, and recreational areas
>This place was pretty much the next step up from the homeless shelter
>Or... it was the homeless shelter in this world
>The Princesses hadn't said you couldn't stay
>So, for those extra 5 days, you'd been chilling here, not doing much but try to learn the way things were ran
>So far, it was as you'd thought
>The women ran the show
>They worked the important jobs, they were the doctors, the guards, the bosses
>The stallions were the underlings, the fry-cooks, the farmers
>So you'd taken suit anyway, you never liked hard work
>You opted to help out at a local bakery, and for some reason they were more than happy to hire you
>You'd wondered if it had anything to do with your androgyny
>But... here we are

>The door opened as a proud looking mare entered with her daughter
>You look up from writing out a refill request for more blueberry icing, ready to serve
"Good morning, Ma'am, welcome to Delight's Delacacies! How may I serve you today?"
>Ugh, that fucking line, you hated it
>The mare looks at you and winks, but speaks up
>"I'll have a cherry cupcake, my daughter will have a yum-yum."
>Of course it's 'will have' and not 'would like', the entitled cow
"Of course, Ma'am!"
>You say it in the most sickly sweet tone you can muster, grabbing the mare her order
"That'll be 3 bits please!"
>She stops, looking at you
>"Oh? But last week it was 2 bits."
>It was?
>Shit, you hope this doesn't go badly

>>27910488
Ye.
>>
>>27905373
This took a much deeper route into Marshmallow Pony territory than I had intended.

>Now, this is just getting silly.
>You have to get back to work, and so does your little special friend here.
>A clatter to your left reveals Nurse Redheart, who just dropped her clipboard on the ground.
>"Oh, shoot!"
>You watch as she raises her head and looks around suspiciously, and then jumping slightly when she sees you staring at her.
>"Excuse me, sir," she says, clearing her throat, "I didn't mean to swear in your presence."
>Her widdle ears droop and she starts scuffing the floor with a forehoof.
>"Please don't tell the doctors on me. They already laugh at me for being a female nurse."
>Aww.
>Poor thing.
>You lean over and scratch her ears comfortingly.
>It works for Ponewaifu, and thankfully it works for Redheart.
"Don't worry about it, Redheart. You didn't say anything I haven't heard before."
>Redheart leans into your hand, accidentally knocking her little paper nurse's hat off of her head.
>This shit's too cute for you.
>You really REALLY want to hug her, but Ponewaifu told you that hugging is like, second base for ponies.
>As a matter of fact, you aren't really sure what ear-scratching is.
>Is this the pony equivalent of giving someone a handy?
>How many ponies have you molested in your life?
>Is this why Big Mac says you have a "reputation"?
>"Oh, thank you, Mister Anonymous. I didn't want to take another sensitivity course again."
>You make your way back to your "unconscious" wife, returning Redheart's hat to its proper place on her head.
"Besides, I'm more concerned with getting Ponewaifu out of this bed."
>Redheart sighs deeply from beside you and rests a hoof on your knee.
>"Mister Anonymous... we don't know when she's going to wake up."
>Redheart blatantly ignores it when Ponewaifu slowly reaches out a hoof to try and grab at your little plastic baggie of treats.
>>
>>27910700
>"It could be hours. Maybe even days."
>Ponewaifu's having trouble getting past the ziplock. Those hooves of hers aren't meant for this kind of work.
"What, seriously?"
>Redheart nods, trying to keep a professional expression on her face.
"Good," you say, poking Ponewaifu in the side of the stomach, "because it's Ponewaifu's turn to make dinner tonight."
>Ponewaifu squirms when you poke her, losing her hoofgrip on the bag of dried fruits.
>"St-stawp! Anon, no!"
>Redheart doesn't say anything more as you sign your wife's release forms and carry her back home.

>You are Nurse Redheart, and you're taking your naptime break a little bit early today.
>That last encounter with Anonymous and Ponewaifu was too much for you.
>If you thought that watching him read "Goodnight Moon" to her was bad, then watching him talk to his wife as though she would respond to him was heart-breaking.
>You haven't seen a case of denial this bad since you told Ditzy Doo that her eyes would never be the same.
>She still tries to fly like she used to and blames her accidents on bad air currents.
>Normally you wouldn't allow a mare in Ponewaifu's condition to be signed out, but you didn't think you could bear the sight of Anonymous walking home all by himself and coming back in bright and early the next day when visiting hours began.
>You told him that he might have to wait a whole entire day for her to wake up, but you suspect it could last as long as three days.
>How do they expect you to tell a distraught colt the cold, hard truth?

"Come on, Ponewaifu. It's your turn to make dinner."
>The little horse in your arms shakes her head and stubbornly remains completely limp.
>"Nuh-uh, Anon. My tummy still tingles from all that tickling."
>>
>>27910710
>Is she really going to do this?
"Oh well," you say, sighing dramatically, "I guess we won't be having wheatloaf tonight. I'll just order out from that Griffon place again."
>The Griffon place (aka "The Birdhouse") was the only location in town that sold meat, and Ponewaifu knew this.
>The mare in question scrunches up her nose in displeasure, and you're sure you're making progress on her "recovery".
>"Anon, you ALWAYS order out when you have to cook!"
>She cracks an eye open and pouts at you.
>"I thought stallions were supposed to be good in the kitchen. Didn't you take Home Economics with all the other colts in school?"
"No, Ponewaifu, boys in my world weren't required to take Home Ec."
>...well, you DID take Home Ec back in high school, but she doesn't need to know that.
>Ponewaifu closed her eye and, once more, went limp in your arms.
>"Go ahead and order in, Anon. I'll just have some more of that dried fruit you made."
>Dammit.
>Foiled again by small horses.


>The next morning, you're awoken by a knock on your door.
>You stumble out of bed and wander over in the direction of the front door, clad only in your boxers.
>After trying 3 times to grab the doorknob, you wrench the door open.
"Whu'zzit?"
>Nobody answers.
>Was this another ding-dong-ditcher?
>"Uh..."
>Vision still bleary, you finally look down to crotch-level, where most ponies are.
>It's a pony; a rather flustered pony.
>Is that nurse Redheart?
>....oh fuck off, she's staring right at your dick-place.
>How many times do you have to tell them that underwear is NOT a sexy accessory?!
"Oi. Eyes up front, big gal."
>You snap your fingers a few times in front of the pony, making her jump in surprise.
>"Oh! Oh, oops."
>Redheart looks away and blushes, flopping her ears in the universal pony sign of distress.
>>
>>27910720
>"Sorry about that, sir. I'm here to check up on Ponewaifu."
>You nod and let her in, closing the door behind her.
>As the two of you walk to the bedroom, Nurse Redheart starts asking you a few questions.
>"Has there been any change in her condition?"
>Aside from her being a lazy piece of shit?
"No, nurse. She didn't get up no matter how many times I nagged her to make dinner."
>You fold your arms, still grumpy that you had to order take-out AGAIN this week.
>The Birdhouse is expensive, yo.
"I swear, she'll do ANYTHING to get out of chores."

>You are nurse Redheart
>Why won't this stallion stop playing cruel games with your heart?!
>You haven't felt this sad since you watched Horsebambi as a filly.
>You're going to cry if Anonymous asks you why Ponewaifu won't wake up.

>You are Anon, and you've decided to let Redheart take care of Ponewaifu while you go out and do some groceries.
>You can't afford to keep ordering food, so it's time to bite the bullet and make something yourself.
>You've got the little baggie of snacks in your pocket; it's bad enough that your wife doesn't want to do anything because of her "injury", and you aren't about to just let her gorge herself on snacks all day.
>If she's so hungry, she can get up and make something.
>List in hand and basket at the ready, you meander through the crowded market and try to think of what to buy.
>Maybe you'll make a stir-fry tonight.
>.....
>Nah, you had that a few days ago.
>What about homemade soup?
>Not that Equestria has factories or anything like that; any soup you eat is either of your own creation or it comes from a family recipe.
>You know what?
>You really like the idea of soup; even if it won't be a nice tomato soup.
>GOD you miss tom-
>"(Pony pun on "allahu akbar") !"
>>
>>27910727
>Out of nowhere, you feel the distinct sensation of someone rubbing rough hooves across the side of your stomach.
>All around you, ponies scream and run around in a panic.
>You look down and see that little pegasus mare again - the funny one with the dish towel on her head.
>What a little weirdo.
>But you know what?
>You know how to deal with little weirdos having temper tantrums.
>You kneel down and set aside your basket.
>"Hey! Quit moving around so much! How am I supposed to tickle you when -"
>The mare tries to shimmy around you to get a better angle at your sides, but you stop her with a hand.
>You grab her tickling hoof with one hand and reach into your pocket with the other, pulling out your little bag of snacks.
>Ponies are a lot like dogs in some regards; their inability to resist snacks is one of them.
>She struggles and whines for a few seconds now that you've got her hoof in your hand, but you distract her by shaking your bag of dried fruit.
"Want snacks?"
>Her gaze is drawn to the baggie in your hands, and she stops trying to pull her hoof away from you.

>You are Ponice Officer Nutmeg Feathers.
>You arrive on the scene with your partner, Caramel Cuddle.
>The two of you tore down the streets when word of another terrorist tickling had broken out, but it seems like you're too late.
>You're treated to the sight of an empty market and a happy mare eating something out of the human colt's hand.
>Caramel Cuddle leans over and whispers in your ear.
>"Is he... scratching her ears?"
>You fight down a bad case of wing stiffies before responding.
"I think he is."
>You and your partner stand there, hesitant to make an arrest.
>Do you bring the colt in too for public indecency?

>You are Anon, the jailed and arrested.
>You were right; you HAD been molesting ponies after all this time.

End.
>>
>>27910737
This was fun to write, so I'm putting it in my pastebin.

http://pastebin.com/BUV6kjja

>>27910575
Shoot! Sorry, Horsecock, I didn't see you until after I started posting. We cool?
>>
>>27910575
"I'm sorry, Ma'am, our prices must have changed."
>She scowls at you
>"That is not likely, it should be 2 bits for these."
>You glance at the price of a cherry cupcake
>Nope, lady, it says '2 bits'
"It's 3 bits."
>"It's 2!"
"No, I'm telling you, it's 3 bits. Are you really going to raise a fuss over a bit?"
>She stomps angrily at you
>"Of course! You're trying to steal from me!"
>What?
"Okay listen here--"
>"I demand to see your manager!"
"Whatever. Peach Delight, Ma'am? Can you come here, please!"
>You fix your stare at the mare, stupid bitch that she is
>She returns the gaze equally
>The place's owner, Miss Peach Delight, trots into the room from her office after a minute of your intense eye battle
>"Ooohhhhhh hi there, Ms. Saddles!"
>...
>FUCK
>"What seems to be the trouble?"
>Said Ms. Saddles speaks up quite loudly
>"This... stallion of yours, not only spoke back to me and didn't call me Ma'am, but tried to steal from me!"
>Delight looks at you with a raised eyebrow, and back at Saddles
>"Anonymous, we have an arrangement with Ms. Saddles. All confections are just 1 bit for her."
>Even the expensive imported marble cake from the United Maredom?
"Well, I wasn't informed."
>"Don't take that tone with me!"
>She smacks your rear with a hoof, making you jump
>No one sees but Saddles, but if they had...
>"So sorry, Ms. Saddles, it'll of course be... how much was it?"
>The bitch in front of the counter grins at you
>"2 bits."

>After that little incident, you were let go
>Fucking mares, man
>You sit by a stream for a while on the way home
>The view is pleasant
>"Well, hello there gorgeous."
>Oh fuck
"What do you want?"
>"That's no way to talk to a mare like myself."
>She steps into view, she's quite big
>"You wanna gimmie a kiss?"
"No, piss off."
>"Oooooh, you're fiesty one, I love stallions that play hard to get."

>>27910746
...Yeah? I don't care, dude. Besides, this green aint going nowhere, I'm quite bad at this.
>>
>>27890250
How does this thread have anything to do with peadolhilia?
>>
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>>27910427
>because you were a horse now
>>
I'm pretty bad a structuring my greens and making a plot.

Dunno if anyone else is up for writing something with a trappy Anonpone in it.
>>
>>27910076
I think I'm going to look at doing this.

Nothing is guaranteed yet though.
>>
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(Since it seems that there is no green posting going on right now, at least I hope that Horsecock is done for the moment)
Hey, does anyone remember the story about Anon as Spike's dad in dragonquestria?
Well sorry for being absent for a very long time, but it's time to continue it.
In case anyone is interested at all, the pastebin would be here: http://pastebin.com/twrZSWZb

Also a quick recap for all of those, who read the story so far, but aren't so sure they remember everything. (I'll put the whole thing in spoilers in case anyone actually wants to read the pastebin.)


>Anon arrived in Equestria
>He basically became Spike's step dad (without hooking up with Twi)
>Spike reaches adolescence and 'puberty' and goes to 'dragon school'
>Anon goes with him cause Twi.
>Spike is total hot stuff for the local dragoness population cause Anon taught him cool 'marely' behavior
>The little dragon gets into a clique of hot girls: Viper (green), Sapphire (blue), Sandy (white) and Charr (black)
>Spike invites them over for a party and it ends with all of them getting pretty 'licked' (dragon equivalent to getting drunk, named after licking up crushed and burned 'firedust')
>He ends up getting intimate with Viper and they enter an exclusive relationship
>Doesn't matter much to the other dragonesses tho, cause they get the hots for Anon
>By now Charr passed out
>Next day Anon decided to fuck with Viper for taking his sons virginity and also cared for the hungover Charr
>This ends up in a lot of talking, Anon in swimming trunks and Charr stealing a pair of his boxers
>Which she uses to do horribly lewd things
>Meanwhile the resident human talk to the dragon teacher about dragon society, dragon mating and everything else he needs to know to be a good father
>So he uses that knowledge to further fuck with Viper and annoy the hell out of Spike.


And that's basically where we left off.
>>
>>27911025

>You're male and you're wearing an apron.
>Well a lot of males do that in this crazy world, but you're also human.
>Meaning you're Anon.
>And dinner is almost ready.
>Took you long enough, but the three sizzling boar steaks in the pan are just so close to being a perfect medium rare.
>Any second now.
>Aaaaaaany secon-
>Taking the pan off the heat you quickly place the steaks on their respective plates.
>Now comes the hard part.
>Letting the meat rest.
>…
>Shit you don't even know if it makes any sense, but you saw it on a cooking show once, so it has to have at least some value, right?
>You use the remaining time to set the table and place a bowl of crushed minor rubies on the table.
>Apparently some kind of dragon seasoning, but so far you refrained from actually trying to taste all those dragon recipes you learned.
“KIDS, DINNER IS READY!”
>After sitting down yourself it only takes a few moment before the two young dragons enter.
>Spike with a smug as fuck smile on his face.
>Oh boy you fear for your poor armchair.
>Thank the horse princesses that you already got some fresh leather on the rack.
>Viper enters a lot more reluctantly, almost hiding behind her new mate.
>Maybe, just maybe you took your joke too far.
>…
>Naaaaaahhhh.
>But you should probably still apologize.
“Alright, a nice big steak for everyone, together with rubies and an apology.”
>While Spike just sits down nonchalantly and starts digging in, Viper eyes you suspiciously.
>”An apology?”
>Sighing you cut a piece of meat and put it on your fork.
“Yes, you see, I may have taken my joke a liiiiitle bit too far.”
>Spike makes a sound that only years of experience could identify as a 'grunt of disdain'.
“I apologize for that. You can call me Anon, like everyone else. And I think Spike can handle himself well enough to not need my protection.”
>You eat the first piece of your steak and savor the juicy flavor of wild boar for a moment.
>>
>>27911032

“So you can do whatever you want, it's not my business as long as you don't fuck up too hard.”
>It takes a few seconds before the green dragoness answers.
>”Alright.”
>That's all the conversation you get tonight.
>Well, that's going to take some warming up…

>You reek and you're hips ache.
>So you're Charr and you're still lying on top of your sleeping rock, drenched in your own juices.
>Ewww, it's getting sticky!
>You get up and make your way to the bedroom door.
>Time to wash up and-
>After opening your bedroom door, Sapphire and Sandy basically spill into your room.
>Turning your blush-meter to ultra-max you do the only sensible thing.
>Screaming.
>Screaming while trying to push your friends out of your room.
>Without success.
>Sapphire easily overpowers you, leaving you flailing and embarrassed.
>”Stop that dammit! Now where the fuck is Anon?”
>Anon? Why would they think-
>Oh.
>Of course, they listened in.
“He's... not here.”
>Meanwhile Sandy takes a deep whiff of your room before recoiling slightly.
>”Pretty sure it kinda smells like him though...”
“T-thats… because… I stole his pants.”
>Apparently both of them didn't notice the piece of slightly torn cloth you're wearing around your hips.
>Until now.
>Sandy's jaw flaps open wordlessly and Sapphire just rises an eyebrow at you.
>”You… stole his pants? And you decided it would be a good idea to wear them and masturbate?”
“Uhm… yes?”
>Suddenly the blue dragoness puts a hand on your shoulder and wipes a fake tear from her eye.
>”I've never been so proud of you Charr. We'll make a real dragon out of you yet.”
>Then she turns to Sandy and sighs.
>”I'm not so sure about that one though...”
>Snapping her claws in front of Sandy's face, as always, didn't help.
>”Damn she's out cold again. Well you go get a shower and I'll make sure our weak willed friend recovers. We need to talk.”
>>
>>27911039

>Scales even more beautiful than your namesake and hair as soft as silk.
>You're, of course, Sapphire.
>And you and your little group need to get to planning as soon as possible.
>Charr already had a decisive victory it seems, but nothing that would actually help you seducing the human piece of sex made reality.
>While she's in the shower you take a look around.
>Shit, sometimes you wish you'd pay more attention to things that aren't you.
“Now where the fuck do I get some water in here.”
>It wasn't that hard finding a kitchen in a cave with 4 rooms but a container that could actually hold some water?
>Nothing.
>No glasses, chalices or bowls.
>So you do the sensible thing every friend would do.
>You carry Sandy into the kitchen, place her head into the sink and open the valve.
>That always works.
>”Arghlbrlarghblrgh-”
>Yep, works eeeeevery time.
>It takes her a few seconds to calm down – and stop coughing water – but at least she's back in reality.
“You really need to stop doing that.”
>”No, YOU really need to stop doing that! What did I ever do to you?!”
>And, again, you do the only right thing in this situation.
>Giving her the best shrug you could muster.
“You were out for a few minutes, Charr should be out of the shower soon, so lets get back to the main cave.”
>With a grumbling white dragoness behind you, you make your way back to the oh-so-comfy living room rocks.
>Mom always had tons of rugs and rich pony or minotaur clothes lying around to lounge on.
>And now you have to resort to stupid rocks that aren't comfy even for rock standards.
>Sometimes you miss the sandstone beach...
>But more often than not you just ignore those feelings and push on.
>Your mother taught you very early that feelings are for males.
>And so far everything your mom ever taught you proved to be true.
>That's why you're so awesome.
>Plopping down on one of the rocks that's not among the worst to sit on you sigh.
“Hurry up Charr, I'm getting bored and we need to talk to you.”
>>
>>27911044

>Wet, agitated and still to flustered to really speak up about it.
>You're Sandy, and even though you disapprove of Sapph's methods, you know that it's only for your best – and her amusement.
>Mostly her amusement.
>After you entered the main cave with your blue scaled friend it takes only a few more minutes before Charr joins you.
>”Alright, so whats the plan?”
>”The first part of the plan, is YOU telling US, what the fuck happened over at Anon's.”
>The black dragoness gulps audibly and takes a deep breath.
>”Alright listen up girls, I'll start at the beginning. After I passed out, I – apparently – slept on Mr A's lap. And when I woke up his wood was basically slapping my face.
“No way!”
>“Not consciously of course, but apparently someone had a very pleasant dream that night.”
>Charr takes another deep breath and grins.
>”Felt pretty good... SMELLED pretty good.”
>She winks at you.
>Damn, that's just not fair!
>Just because you don't dust, and get wasted, and get hungover enough to miss school!
>”And then the morning after he made me a kickass breakfast and drew me a cold bath. And I shit you not, a whole pool filled with COLD water! “
>You notice Sapphire losing her composure for a second there.
>”Cold... water...?”
>“Yeah! And the best thing, Mr A went in there together with me! He still had some kind of pants on, but I could clearly see the outline of his junk through it.”
>The young highland dragon grins again and gives her best Sapphire impression.
>”He also hugged me. And after he left I stole a pair of his shorts and made my way home. Easy as that. You, uhm, know the rest.”
>Alright, that's it.
>You are as determined to get into Mr Anon's pants as a young kinky dragoness with a lot of weird fetishes can be!
“We need to come up with some plans. Before we can convince him to share, we need to convince him to be with one of us first! Any ideas?”
>>
>>27911055

>The answers consist of mostly grumbling and 'no's
>And it takes a whole day of brainstorming, but in the end, everyone of you came up with a plan.
>Operation Incognito starts now.

>You're sitting in a mostly ruined armchair, reading a book about the right ways to fix old furniture.
>So you're Anon.
>You're not sure if your most priced possession can be fixed that easily though...
>And you can't even be mad at Spike for ruining it.
>Maybe It would be better to build something new instead...
>Suddenly a most ominous feeling comes over you.
>As if three gods of death and destruction just decided to haunt you until you take your last breath.
>...
>Nah, probably just imagination and armchair PTSD.
>A knock at the door pulls you out of your thoughts, now who could that be?

Alright, that's it for today. Sorry again for my long absence, but I don't think you'll really be interested in me whining about my personal problems. So I hope I haven't lost all of my writing skills (and English vocabulary) and that the people who read this still enjoyed it.
Feedback is, of course, always welcome.

Which brings me to the last part:
Which of the three girls just knocked at Anon's door? It's your choice!
If you don't choose you'll reach a [BAD END].
>>
>>27911064
Charr, my good man.
>>
>>27911064
Welcome back, boy-O. We missed ya.

Sandy
>>
>>27911064
Good to see you back.
Ember
>>
>>27898310
Silly Pone is silly. Bring in the box.
>>
>>27911064
Nice to see you, friend. Charr, please.
>>
Analpluganon is my waifu
>>
Need some help with something.
Are they stories oriented in a dangerous working place ( Construction, Hunter, Lumberjack, Farmer, etc)?
I know it is a cliche, but i feel good energy coming from that idea.
I just want to see some examples if there are.
Sorry to bother with this.
>>
>>27911312
Well, there are stories like woodworker Anon http://pastebin.com/XasZRMiq by Shuk, and then there's the firefighter Anon oneshot(?) in this thread, along with several others. If you want to write something like this, go ahead. We wont judge, at least, not until you start making weird statements in your green/force a niche fetish in.
>>
>>27911064
Charr is best dragon, so do whatever it takes to make her win.
Whether that means she's up next or not, I don't know - but you do. So don't let me down.
>>
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>>27911293
>>
>>27911064
dennis
>>
>>27911560
Aaaand who are you?
>>
>>27911587
Chimeragoose. I was thinking about starting up a story here, forgot to take my name off.
>>
What ponies would be likely to go out to minotaur lands for a monster hunt, be it recreation or work?

The obvious ones I can think of are as follows.

AJ, RD, maybe Twi added in on a thrillseeking vacation(Can throw in gilda for good measure.)

Shining and an entourage(Maybe Cadence/Luna) for work. Migrations look like they'll cause problems or something.

Daring Do, because inspiration for her next book.
>>
>>27910076
I think this can lead to some very silly scenes

>Ugh, the climate here is so hot!
>And, judging by how matted your fur is right now, it's humid, too!
"How do you handle these conditions?!"
>Your tall, biped guide grimaces at you
>"Would you stop complaining? Here," he tosses you a bottle of something, "just drink that."
"What's this?"
>"Water laced with powdered cooling crystals."
"I thought crystal ingestion is dangerous."
>He groans and puts his grabbers over his face
>"Stop being such a stickler for rules and just drink the damn thing."
>Well
>Drinking this will cool you down
>Alright then, bottom's up
>You pop open the lid and press the opening to your lips
>Crisp, chill liquid flows into you, and you feel better already
>You drain the bottle
"Aaah. Thanks, I really needed tha-"

>You look at the pony encased in the ice block
>Finally
>At last, peace and quiet
>This asshole's been complaining about everything since the two of you started to head into the woods
>'Oh noes, so many bugs, ahh, soo dirty, I've lived my entire life in a palace, etc.'
>She literally had the cojones to talk about being hot when you're wearing thick-ass leather armor
>You take some rope out of your pack and tie up the newly-made sculpture before beginning to haul it
>That Tentacle Worm ain't gonna hunt itself, ya'know?
>>
>>27911974
Continue
>>
>>27911974
I dunno... Murdering diplomats doesn't seem like a great way to run a business.
>>
>>27912384
I run a hot dog stand and I can tell you for a fact that your success is directly proportional to the number of diplomat corpses you own.
>>
>>27911974
You gonna do more, or can I pick it up as my next story?
>>
>>27910427
>>...And you were a pony now
HOL UP HOL UP
>>
>>27911064
Fuck yeah!
Welcome back, never leave us like that again.
We missed you.
>Who is door?
That teacher dragon, he wants some ayy lovin too
All the dragons together, their idea of cooperating is to bumrush him all at once
>>27911603
Well hurry up and write it then.
>>27911560
Changeling is also acceptable dragon.
>>27911974
>>27912384
A frozen pony is a safe pony.
Remember to put yours in the freezer if you have to leave it for an extended period.
>>27912487
>Implying those are the only options
Both of you continue it.
Then we'll have TWO stories.
>>27910759
Keep going.
>>27910746
Also keep going.
>>
>>27911790
A scientific expedition by Twilight or possibly Moon Dancer

Trixie looking to capture one for her act/show
>>
>>27910427
>anon becomes a pony

DROPPED
R
O
P
P
E
D
>>
>>27912697
True, Anon as a pony is pretty shitty. Can we add that to the rules? No Anonpone?
>>
>>27912487
Go ahead. I just threw this thing up as an idea.
>>
>>27911064
Ember

But actually Charr, and I am very glad to see you back!
>>
>>27911790
Nightmare Moon goes there to blow off steam and relieve the stress of trying to be a good ruler of the kingdom she took over from her sister.
>>
>>27912831
isn't there a thread for it already?
>>
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>>27890250
>>
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>>27913066
fine ill go to bed. but only because you have dubs.
>>
Whatever happened to that 'Cadence has amnesia and thinks Anon's her husband' story?
>>
>>27902555
good.
>>
>>27913146
Are you that guy on /cyoag/ who roleplayed with Angelanon? If not, disregard this post and I suck cocks.
>>
Twilight wants to write down your rape fantasy for an erotic novel she's planning to author under the pen name "Damp Longhorn".
>>
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>>27913184
I'd cuddle that horse.
>>
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>>27913146
GET OUT USELESS NAMEFAG REEEEEEEEEEE
>>
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>>27913368
>>
>>27913272
>”I don’t get this thing at all.”
>Twilight twirled the cube within her magic grip. Turning it this way and that, her eyes scanning the stickers adhered to its surface.
>Her look of concentration was solely directed at it, nose scrunched up at failing to grasp its purpose.
“It’s a rubik’s cube Twilight, there isn’t really much to get about it.”
>”But it surely has to have some purpose. I’ve seen you twisting it around, moving the colors.”
>Maybe you had been fiddling with the puzzle that made the trip to equestria with you a lot more often nowadays.
>It would have caught the ever observant Twilights attention.
>And now it was being carefully scrutinized by the purple pony.
>”Hmm, what secrets does it hold. Is there something inside it?”
>The question was directed towards herself than you.
>Sitting there on the floor of her study she regarded with the most curious expression.
>”Anon, show me again how it works.”
“Again? I thought you said you didn’t need any help figuring it out earlier.”
>”Well I’m asking for another demonstration so I can figure it out.”
>If Twilight wasn’t your marefriend you would’ve let her confusion continue.
“Alright, but only once more.”
>Scooting over to where she was seated you picked up the pony and placed her in your lap.
>The act which she met by pressing her back against you and wiggling around a bit to get into the most comfortable position.
>The cube floated to your hand before the magic encasing it disappeared.
“So each of the squares can be rotated, the point is to line up all the face so that they all have the same color.”
>>
>>27913184
>"Come on, Anon! Every colt has a rape fantasy! Even I do!"
"I'm sure it doesn't work that way, Twilight."
>Lifting Twilatte by her withers, you set her down to your side and continue walking to your home.
>"Anoooooooooon! Even just a little curiosity? Please?"
>You look at Twalot and boop her on the nose.
>"Owie! Your boops hurt too much, Anon!"
>You blink at Twijuana and continue walking home.
>"Hey, hey! I'm serious about this! This would sell a lot, Anon! I'll even pay you 30% of royalties!"
>You ponder on it for a moment.
>You shake your head and pick up Twilong.
>"So, what do you say, Anon? Just tell me your rape fantasy, and we'll become rich! Rich, I tell you!"
>You momentarily drop Tweelight to fumble your hand in your pocket to find your keys.
>You unlock the door and bring Purple inside.
>You set her down on a chair too big for her and run your hand over your face.
"Alright, Twi, but just this once, okay?"
>She perks up immediately and conjures up quill and a blank book.
>You mentally sigh and take a glance at title.
>'Preying the Apex Predator'
>You better hope you're getting paid enough for this shit.
>>
>>27913450
>Finishing with another show of how it worked, you let her continue to mess with the toy.
>Your hands now devoid of it went to her sides where pressed them against her incredibly soft fur.
>”Knock it off, I can’t concentrate when you do that.”
“And if I don’t?”
>”Then I’ll do I’ll use Applejacks advice about dealing with fussy colts and throw away all your mane care products.”
“First I don’t have a mane, it’s hair. Secondly and most importantly all I use is soap and shampoo.”
>Your finger danced around her sides all the while, it was quite effective, you could tell because the magic around the cube wavered ever so slightly.
>And that’s how you spent your day, sitting and playing with a plastic toy with the mare that made your days in an alien world the happiest you ever had.
>Maybe tomorrow you’d let her mess with phone.
>>
>>27913450
Oh shit, sorry, were you posting green? Sorry man.
>>
>>27913272
I'd fuck that horse.
>>
>>27913472
Just a quickie, you're good.
>>
>>27913184
>Damp Longhorn
>>
>>27913184
Wet Longdick. kek
>>
And then there was none.
>>
>>27909806
More?
>>
Reporting from real life.
A classmate told me that I would probably be biased in my social studies assignment on feminism because I'm a guy.
It's happening people.
We're becoming a RGR society.
>>
>>27914085
>Men are still treated like shit IRL
Not RGRE enough
>>
>>27914085
>A classmate told me that I would probably be biased in my social studies assignment on feminism because I'm a guy.


Did you tell them to go fuck themselves?
you should have.
>>
>>27913146
Shit I forgot to take of the name, my bad.
>>27913168
Yes I am that guy. Currently remade the build and am now double teaming angel with a clone.
>>
>>27914085
>Meanwhile on /mlh/ - Human
>"Reversed Gender Roles Earth"
>It's full of mares fantasizing about reverse-reverse-rape and human males lusting after Eponymous' hot pony vagina
>>
>>27914189
So...
/B/?
>>
>>27914202
pretty much.
>>
>>27914189
"No gals, hear me out. You know that horseapples those uppity stallionists get all upset about? Marespreading? Imagine Eponymous sitting on a bus and she hears some girls complaining that a boy is sitting with his legs spread too wide open."
>You get a reply in less than a minute.
>"kek"
>Another one five minute later.
>"what would marespreading be called in rgre"
>You fire up your horsekeyboard and reply to her.
"Either malespreading or boyspreading."
>It's ten minutes before another pony replies to your post. Meanwhile, the thread discusses how Eponymous would have a huge following of beta mare-er, males who would jump at the chance to defend her honour.
>Hah!
>Big, strong Eponymous being followed by a bunch of try-hard colts.
>The pony who quotes your post says only one word.
>"Manspreading"
>Perfect.
>You minimize Ponechan and get to work on your newest story featuring Eponymous in Reversed Gender Roles in Earth.
>>
>>27914267
Samefag. Anybody want to take up the reigns and write something meta about Anon in RGRE featuring a mare who writes about Eponymous in RGRE(arth)?
>>
>>27914280
No, please.
Don't turn this into /b/
>>
>>27914280
>"Hey there twilight, whatcha doing?"
"Just writing a bit of fiction"
>"Can I see"

>You are Eponymous
>On Earth
>You have all the stallions
>Ahem, males
>All the penis
>You can't stand it when the mares treat the stallions badly.
>You stand up to them
>You lose, but you win the affection of the colts
>Hot monkey dick sex ensues
>Something something RGRRGRE.

>Be Anon in RGRE
>Why is there a RGREarth thread on Equistria?
>Constants and variables you're guessing
>Meh
>You step into a tear and go to France, Paris.
>>
>>27914280
>Human males cant handle the HMV(Hot Mare Vag)
>>
>>27914509
>mares cant handle the hmd
>men cant handle the hmv
>both immediately cum upon penetration
>>
>>27914509
This is more true than I'd like to admit
>>
>>27914267
>Coming home from buying groceries and dodging mares left and right, you are the one and only Anonymous
>And by the cosmic deities you swear that any man would trade anything to be crowded by girls everyday.
>However! Enough of that!
>It's time to waste your time on the internet!
>You stop for a moment and wonder if this world had an equivalent to 4chan.
>You open up your shitty browser and immediately search out "chan imageboard" and find Pchan.
>It was wonderful.
>Shitposts and roleplaying and CYOAs galore.
>You click the catalog to browse threads.
>MLH, Shitpost, Electra, "HI EPON!", Satyr Abomination--
>Oh hey, that's interesting.
>'Reversed Gender Roles Earth', huh?
>Well, that doesn't look too bad.
>You open the thread.
>Immediately the first post you see is "First for Horn Ring", followed by numerous replies complaining about the "Horn Ring".
>You see so many posts about how Earth is much darker and more posts complaining that the posters were edgelords.
>Numerous writefags filled the thread with greentext stories apparently about a character named Eponymous.
>A lot of it was true, but others much more silly, yes.
>You did not expect such a general to exist.
>Cracking your knuckles, you fire up a reply post to the OP, claiming that you're a human male and you can verify any claim about Earth.
>A few minutes later, you receive a reply.
>"Balls or gtfo, mare."
>Another moment later, another reply.
>"Here's your (You)"
>You chuckle to yourself and take a picture of your crotch, plain for anyone to see.
>You stick the picture to your post, followed by a "btw am guy ;)"
>Not a moment too soon, replies flooded the thread.
>"OH SHIT"
>"EPONS BTFO"
>"BLUE BOARD"
>You grab an apple from your bag of groceries and take a crisp bite.
>The taste of the apple combined with the pic of yourself stirring commotion in the thread sends you into a smug state.
>You answer questions here and there, smirking at the attention.

All I got. You guys can fuck around with it.
>>
>>27911064
holy shit you're back! Welcome back! As for who is at the door, I gotta say Char. She's already worked her way into Anon's house/head so whom better to continue the assault for our glorious dragon filled climax.
>>
>>27913368
kek
>>27913743
>>
>>27913368
That's provided you're able to get off your fat ass and roll that 15 steps out of the house.
>>
>>27910842
Fwiw, I liked your idea. Everyone's been writing rgre with anon having a great time of it. Good to see someone writing the less cynical/more realistic "being the woman in sexist rgre sucks" version.
>>
>>27911064
Thx for coming back sleepy!
>>
>>27913118
I was hoping for more of that.
>>
>>27915233
Is there a link?
>>
>>27914559
>Be Anon in Equestria
>Horses have a magic internets
>It's like a regular internets but it's all sparkly
>Found pony 4chan, they call it ponychan
>Soemthing deep inside you feels this is wrong, but since you're not sure why, you ignore it and do what you do best.
>Shitpost.
>Shitpost like this world has never seen before.
>You call upon your many years of experience as you open up a thread.
>These ponies won't know what hit them.
>>
If you think about it, Anon is not an individual.
It is an eldritch amalgamation of the wills of many hyoomans.
That's why it is able to enter Equestria.
It has many aspects, The Powerful, The Just, The Deceitful, The Cruel.
But Anon has existed since the desire for anonymity.
When a person puts on a mask to commit a robbery, they are anon.
When a person puts on a mask to perform heroic deeds, they are anon.
What if equestria's version of Anon manifested?
>>
>>27915289
What if they met?
Would they clash?
>>
>>27915293
>>27915289
I want to cum inside Anonymous.
>>
>>27915296
Sodomize anon
>>
>>27913055
Your fun is like stale bread that went beyond saving.
Someone might lose a tooth.
Still you cling to it, with the enthusiasm that deserves a better cause.
>>
>>27904815
>Gryphons mating for life

AU where anon goes to griffonia rather than canterlot?
>>
>>27913118
This.
>>
>>27915289
No one cared about who anon was until he put on the mask.
>>
>>27915289
>>27915293

>Anonymous VS Eponymous: Dawn of Shitposting
>>
I have hopefully fixed up the ending of Single Dadnon a bit better. It's now on pastebin.
http://pastebin.com/1hAjUL8q
>>
>>27915484
If we you take off his mask, will you die?

>>27915444
>Be Princess Cadence, collector of glass ponies.
>You have the world record for them, in fact.
>"Princess cadence, winner of an award."
>You like the sound of that.
>You feel pride well up within you.
>You feel like a mare.
>Today is the day of the big festival where your glass ponies celebrate not being enslaved under Sombra.
>Now they've got you instead.
>Isn't that happy?
>Yes, yes it is.
>So they're doing al manner of celebratey things all through the city.
>You're on the way to the throne room to see a play by some of them.
>It's a new one they found deep in the palace library called "That there yeller feller with the fancy hat".
>You reach your throne and sit down, letting your ponies bring you some popcorn.
>The actors start to act, the drummers begin to drum, and the pipers play a tune that makes the bottoms of your teeth sort of tingle.
>You happily watch the play, entranced by the story.
>Then a stage light catches the set on fire.
>By the time it's noticed it's too late to stop the blaze from consuming the entire stage.
>You valiantly brave the heat and clear a path to the door to ensure the safety of your subjects.
>Then amidst the scattered seating you see him.
>Your husband is lying limp on the ground!
>You rush to save him from this calamity.
>Your magic slides off of him when you try to pick him up.
>With all your strength you manage to pull him to safety using your mouth, thanks to some quick thinking.
>The crystal ponies are all panicking and trying to put out the fire, paramedic ponies tending to the injured.
>They are clearly in a state of shock as they act confused when they see your husband, as if they don't know who he is.
>He is loaded onto a stretcher and you accompany him as he is rushed to the hospital.
>They have to put several beds together to hit him when he arrives, he always was a tall fellow.
>Now all you can do is wait and hope.
>>
Also, new thread.

>>27915546
>>
File: BTFO EGG DONOR..jpg (199KB, 1000x788px)
BTFO EGG DONOR..jpg
199KB, 1000x788px
And one to kill off the thread.
>>
>>27915557
Filly Cadence has dong ringed us again!
>>
>>27911025

Your Alive!!!!! Oh Happy Days
>>
>>27914559
The best
>>
>>27915289
I think there was actually a story where Anon confronted Discord and went Eldritch abomination on him
>>
>>27915815
Pls link.
Thread posts: 506
Thread images: 70


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