RGRE: Reversed Gender Roles Equestria

Luna wants some too.

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>>27570043
Of course she does, she was punished with a thousand years forced chastity.

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mfw it's not dong ring

dong ring fags btfo

>>27570058
But the dong ring is there. It's just out of frame

>>27570058

that's what you think. the mares are fighting over who has their dong ring below the other

We need a story where Celly and Cadey are jelly over Luna and Anon hooking up.

Or hate-sex between Anon and Cadence,

>>27570252
Fuck that we need genetically modified super-faggot Anon and his quest to suck all the dicks in RGRE

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I want an all pegasus herd.

>>27570352
No,

Go back to containment thread, HomoHorse.

>>27570547
RGRE homo horse is best exploration of homohorse.

Plus muh feminine fetish.

>>27570252

I like both of those ideas, especially the first one.

Celly and Condense making jealous horse noises while trying to woo anon into letting them into the herd with Luna, but Anon is strictly monogamous.

>>27570721

Isn't Condense in a monogamous relationship with Shining? Wouldn't using Twilight instead of her make more sense? You could have Celestia try to coach Twi into being less of a sperg around stallions.

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>>27570252
>>27570721
Can't I just have a happy relationship with my horsewife without all the drama?

>>27570789
>Implying I want to read a story featuring Torchlight Spackle

>>27570878
Bitch, Sporkle done right is grade A+ waifu material.

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>>27570898
Sure, but then she is out of character so it does really count. Personally I'm not a big fan of Turbo Autist or the rest of the Friendship Brigade. S1 E2 should have had a different winner, the truest waifu. The one waifu to rule them all.

>>27570950
That's not nurse Redheart

>>27570963
No, it's Princess Best Horse*

*Authorized co-holder of that title along with her sister.

>>27570992
See, this Anon gets it.

>>27570992
Candyass and Twiggy?

20 posts in and already the thread is pure shit. Good job idiots.

>>27571178
Just doing my civic duties

>Anon is an outdoorsy and active fellow.
>Had a parachute made and pays Pegasi teams to take him up in the air and just drop him.
>Most mares nearly have a heartattack when they see him doing all these dangerous activities.
>Anon just want to have fun
>Bluefast is conflicted about her mares-only policy and might now secretly want the D

>>27571217
>>Had a parachute made and pays Pegasi teams to take him up in the air and just drop him.
That sounds pretty fucking rad. He should do some wingsuit diving so he can fly with his pegasus bros.

>>27570038
bitchesaintshit.jpg

>>27571257
I remember my first solo jump, I thought my balls receded so far they were hugging my stomach out of fear. But it was pretty fun.

>>27571459
I'm going through aviation training so I figure getting into skydiving might be a good thing to do.

So is a small benis comparable to small tits or a loose vagu

>>27571788
balls:tits::painis:vag

That's why stallions support their balls with bras.

>>27571776
Just out of curiosity what type of aviation training? I flew on helicopters for a few years and spent some time in a piper for fixed wing. I did the skydiving as a hobby which was worth every penny.

>>27571897
Fixed wing. Started out flying Cirrus SR20s and I'm now transitioning to a Cessna 182RG. Flew once in a 7-GCBC Citabria.

Spy writer here. I'm gonna make dinner, then get started on some more green. Stay tuned.
Ps, give me puns
>Bon Clancy's Anon-Center
>The Bon Identity

>>27572130
Bon Bond.

>>27572130
Bon notice

>>27570808
No, Anon. You can't. All the autists have to sperg out over their cartoon horses in order to be satisfied.

>>27571217
"Drop me."
>"What?! No!"
"I have a wingsuit; I'll glide. Now drop me!"
>"Absolutely not! I'm not going to be the mare responsible for getting the dumb colt kille-hey!"
>That's the point where you wriggle free and dive.

>>27572299
I would totally do this. Skydiving from Cloudsdale sounds like a blast.

>>27572130
Inform-aunt
Sad cottage
Gold deny
Queue

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>>27572299
Wing suit you say?

>>27572299
>>27572512
>>27572602
Pfft.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_VPvKl6ezyc

>>27572614
>anon has been shat on by bird horse for the last time
>he builds wings so he can shit on them!

>>27572299
Anon while wing gliding:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hevpHGPxRfU

I come back with another installment.

Pastebin at http://pastebin.com/a0PvM8D8

>Walking back home the sight of the distant enlarged home brought the thought of what was once carousel boutique before you formed your herd with Rarity, Sassy, and coco.
>It sure is now a bigger home for your herd, but with two thirds of the herd always away on business the circular mini-mansion has felt big for you.
>Maybe you should bring up that issue to herd alpha Rarara during pillow talk time.
>Nah. Maybe you'll do something whimsyful since you love messing with Rarity.
>The last time Coco fainted when you wore nothing but a sandwich board when they asked you to advertise the boutique.
>It was worth the week of supervision as punishment.
>Opening the door, the entry bell was met with a call from upstairs.
>”~Anon are you home?~ Did you get me my jasmine tea and vanilla pickle sandwich?”
>............ Fuck.
>Putting down the tea package and the doughnut you prepare to leave again.
“Umm. I forgot something outside. I'll be right back!”
>”Well do hurry back my great ape. Momma misses you!”
>Edging out the door you pat your bit bag. 5 coins inside and you only needed 2.
>This should be a fine trip.
“To Sugarcube Corner!”
>Shit. You said that out loud. Damn whimsy.

>Be Zecora. The only Zebra in this town that didn't have the “zigger” aura.
>You took a break maring your shop, to keep your hopes of joining Anon's herd up top.
>From your invisible position granted from your chameleon potion's condition, your tradition of stalking Anon came to fruition.
>Anon bought your tea but forgot a sandwich apparently. Maybe if you beat him to Sugarcube Corner and get him the sandwich he'll put a good word for you with Rarity!
>She already accepted you as different from you average zigger, if you can prove yourself further maybe when you ask to join her herd it'll aid your dicker....

Comments and critique are welcome. Something feels of with my work and I can't pin it down.

>>27571114
Eww

>>27572602
That mustache alone will aid him in defying gravity

>>27572907
>>you wore nothing but a sandwich board
Before my brain could English good, I pictured Anon with a BLT sandwich at waist-height with his dick jammed in between the bread

>>27572983
Why do you think they HAD mustaches, Anon?! You can't science properly without a mustache. Look at all the great thinkers: Tesla; Einstein; the other ones

>>27573157
So a Boner-Lettuce-Tomato?

>>27573302
Good one.
>You are Rarity
>"Ladies~ I just got out of the kitchen, and I've made you a sandwich."
>Finally!
>It took you for-bucking-ever, but Anon has accepted his....
>That's a penis.

>>27572907
You have a slight tendency toward run-on sentences, and it really gets noticable when you try to fit a couplet in each line of green text with Zecora. Try adding a few commas where there sounds like a natural pause. If you have a period anywhere other than at the end of a line of green text, either turn it into a comma, or hit enter and put it on a new >. This helps green text feel punchier, more in-the-moment.
It's up to you, but it might be better to not have zecora's point of view right now, and just have her mysteriously turn up around Anon.

>>27572907
You're making me hate Rarity's bitchiness even more. I didn't know that was possible.

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>>27573549
>Rarity's bitchiness
She just asked for a sandwich and tea.

You can ask for a snack without being a cunt, you know.

>>27572130
Ahahaha sunburned shoulders because I'm an idiot

>You have a tasty sandwich, so you must be Anon
>Apparently your one night stand thought you were trying to kill her
>You put on an indifferent mask, but secretly, you're freaking out
>How many times have you sold poisonous ingredients assuming they were for cooking?!
>A lot
>That's how you pay your rent
>Rather than worry about any murders you may be an accessory to, you focus on your delicious sandwich
>You got Fleur's tomato slice since she can't eat it
>It's no ketchup, but egg and tomato is just as nice
>Aw shit
>It just slid out onto the floor
>You reach down and pick it up, feeling a breeze across your neck as you bend over

>You are Fleur, the most morally confused assassin in Equestria
>If Anon is innocent, how many other such misunderstandings have taken place?
>You long for the good old days when you didn't question anything
>That's it, you're returning your license to kill and applying for a desk job
>The glamour and excitement is not worth all this guilt
>Anon ducks down for a moment, and something fast whizzes by, just missing his head
>With a dull thud, it embeds itself in the loveseat just behind him
>You whip your head around, getting a glimpse of a pink-and-blue mane as it disappears beneath the window sill
>Buck...

>You are Agent Sweetie Drops
>Targets still active
>Fleur has been caught by his masculine wiles, as you knew she would
>Damned schoolfilly
>You'll send them both to tartarus

>>27573763
This went from silly to dark in an instant. Please don't go too far down that road.

>>27570685
>Says the sis that clamjammed us just when Anon got his homo horse sidekick in the story

>>27573763
DISREGARD ORDERS, ACQUIRE PENIS

>>27572907
~Whimsy~/10, needs more length

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>Anon is out with bugwaifu
>She's transforming into their friends and does silly impersonations of them
>Her friends egg her on to try to morph into Anon, but she's hesitant; she knows that saying mean things about your coltfriend generally leads to sleeping on the couch for a week
>She eventually gives in and does her best to turn her quadrupedal body into a bipedal form, but it doesn't work out so well.
>Pic related.
>Ponies aren't humans, and they haven't seen any other humans; they think bugwaifu looks weird and kind of scary, but that's it.
>Anon is human and experiences uncanny valley levels of terror

>Ponies aren't humans and don't get that instinctive fear of "not quite human"; Anon gets freaked out by a lot of things that ponies only find kind of creepy
>Anon doesn't like to look at minotaurs for very long

>>27573848
so your saying anon is a pussy

>>27573865
No, he's saying that Anon has a natural revulsion to false/deformed imitations of humanity.

>>27573887
sounds like a little bitch

>>27573895
sounds like a son of the imperiam, know to put that fear to work by purging.

>>27574019
Only a deep dicking can set this right.

>You'll never fuck a bugpone so hard she starts changing forms

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>>27572196

>>27573763
>>27573795
Can love bloom on the battlefield?

>>27573367

That has ALWAYS been an issue for me. And I can dig the Zecora idea. If I'm not a strong writer it might be better for me not to try and dabble with scene changes. And while I have you, do you have any other ideas?

>>27573549

It's hard to balance her. I try to write her as in character as I can while adding the mindset she loves and hates that she can't move to do basic things.

>>27573763
>>27573795

I think it's an acceptable level of dark. No blood or gore keeps in line with the show itself, if you don't count how sombra exploded onscreen.

>>27573832

Will work on better amounts of >green when posted.

>>27573887

DESU IT'S just on the boarder between natural fear and pussytude. He didn't freak out or anything.

>>27570352
You don't need to genetically modify anon, he's a latent faggot already.

>>27574019
I would be more inclined to believe you if you had spelled Imperium correctly.

>>27574246
Rarara is fine in your story. There's no need to change her because one Anon doesn't like her. All she did was ask for snacks while she was pregnant

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>>27570038
>Erotic violence intensifies

>>27573549
What bitchiness?

>>27574285
my computer didn't put a red line under it, so i see nothing wrong with it.

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>>27574730
>meanwhile, in the background

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>>27575109
>Dream Girl
Of all the stupid shit that came out of those comics, playful Luna was the beacon of hope that still makes me check them out.

>>27573830
Well yeah, I lost the post and didn't update the pastebin. I do that frequently.

>>27575364
That comic arc was funny. She wore the same tshirt but every time it had different things written on it. "Blame my sister" and "buy me things" made me kek quite a lot.

>>27574246
The issue isn't so much scene changes as it is a matter of narrative tension. Rarity thinks Zecora will try to steal Anon away, which Anon doesn't really believe to be the case. The narrative tension here is based on showing Zecora to be flirtatious, but her actual goals need to be somewhat obscure.
Anon keeps coming across her in his errands, and she often has the thing he's looking for, maybe even the last of the thing available. While she is happy to give the thing to him, Anon struggles with gratitude and the feeling that Rarity's warning was real.

Something to consider while writing Zecora in this story is, what does she want from Anon? Is she in it for the exotic hot stallion? Does she have some sort of interest in his herd mares? Does she feel like the fashion mares are too busy to properly take care of Anon?
And when you do have her motivation mapped out, have some of her actions reflect it, while other actions are her trying to be casual, or habitually mysterious, etc.
Most importantly, only show her viewpoint when she is thinking ambiguously. The reader should suspect she is an actual homewrecker until very near the end.

>>27573848
>>27573865
>>27573895
>contributes
>immediately shitposted by a child
Shit guys, it's no wonder your thread is dying.

>>27575936
It's not dying faggot, we're hibernating. We've been invaded by summer, so a good portion of the usual posters aren't saying or doing shit.

There are a few valiant efforts, Frosty and such, but this thread will be shitposting until septemberish.

>>27576114
I've only been on /mlp/ for a few months. do all the writefags come back in the fall or do we lose a few each year?

>>27576118
Both

"...The Aristocrats!"
>"Anonymous, that was a disgusting story! I thought colts were supposed to be... I don't know; less vulgar than that!"
>>"Ooh! Ooh! Did you tell a story, Nonners?! Tell me the story!"
>"Oh Celestia, Pinkie, please don't make him tell it again."

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>>27572907
Write more.

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>>27574567

Oh I was just stating that's how I came up with her actions. I think she is in character and that's all that I feel matters.

>>27575866

This is great advice! I can see where the pieces lie, and I'll be writing as such. I find myself wonder what Zecora's endgame should be, but the beautiful thing is that while the endgame is up in the air the road to it is almost the same! I'm going to remove Zecora's POV from the pastebin but work more on how I portray her, and if I write her POV it'll be a end of story thing like a hidden dairy.

I find my greatest issue with Zecora is to write her own motives with pony thoughts in mind. Trying to keep everyone IC keeps the story on track, but seems to dull the experience when I review it. I wonder if other writers seems to have that issue.

>>27575936

Dude it was a prompt that was ok at best. How would you turn that into a story past a one shot without force? When better prompts come along you see better responses.

Untwist your teats man.

>>27576114
This
I'm posting because I got the spirit of writing in me. It tastes fruity and pays rent, and that's all that matters. I lurked RGRE when this shit started but only posted recently. I bet the 1/3 anons to posts ratio is much higher if viewers where counted.

>>27576231

Will do. I'm going to try and have something written everyday. So that means expect something today.

>>27573848

"Honey, don't ever do that again."
>"I told you he would get mad at me, you cunts!" Bugwaifu shouts at her snickering friends.
"No, I mean you look legitimately terrifying."
>"Really?" she looks down at her transformed state.
>"I mean it would probably be scary to foals or something but..."
"It's like looking into a funhouse mirror from Hell."
>You know what she's trying to imitate, but it's just so off that its terrifying.
>"Huh." she grins and OH GOD THE TEETH.
>"So you wouldn't like it if I got close to you like this?" she slowly creeps over to you.
"Honey, no."
>She gets closer.
"I'm serious!"
>her inherently WRONG grin widens, increasing your terror.

>>27576570
Promptfag here.
Thanks for humouring me, Anon.

>>27576576

No problem.

>>27576570
>Anon instinctively punches Bugwaifu in the face.
>His mad adrenaline fueled monkeystrength causes serious damage.
>Everybody freaks the fuck out as Anon bolts away to the closest window and barrels through it.
>He is never seen again.

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>>27576736
>Anon has both the fight and flight reflex, punching bugwaifu unconscious because of her little prank followed by nope'ing the fuck out.
>Chrissy is flipping out after regaining consciousness because he's gone.
>Anon is busy in the woods making crosses and stakes to fight off possible vampire shape-shifter who he may have stuck his dick in.

>>27576823
Sounds like what would happen if a /k/ anon encountered bug-wife for first time after she tries to seduce him in "human" form. Thus leading to him running away, burning everything screaming about skin-walkers.

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>>27576876
I don't think you would need to be a /k/ enthusiast to have that response. It really doesn't take much to sharpen a few sticks and bless them with Anon's brand of Holy Water! (He got certified online)

I would be more curious like you said, for the aftermath.
Would he be able to trust a pony or bugwaifu after something like that.
Then again he could go on an epic crusade tickling ponies at the stake in the center of town. Booping them to check if their still awake.
If it works for witches it should work on bloodsuckers.

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>>27576926
That Moonie is very nice.

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>>27576949
I like this Moonie

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>>27576949
She doesn't get enough love.

How would Nightmare Moon work in a RGRE world? Would she try be on par with medieval mating rituals where she takes what she wants with force? Basically jumping Anon in public to mark him as hers?

>>27576823
I like the idea of Anon having a stronger flight or flight response than most ponies.

>>27577014
Very, very territorial.

>>27577014
Bear in mind that language changes drastically every few hundred years. It would be more like NMM jumps Anon in the middle of the street and starts yelling archaic proto-English at him.

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>>27577035
>>27577038
>Be slightly reformed Nightmare Moon.
>You got the free and clear from those two “modern” alicorns to live in society proper.
>Naturally step one was to rebuild a harem of stallions for your personal pleasure.
>The first would be that human that, if the stories are to be believed, would be a fine first.
>Spending all day observing him you waited to strike.
>In the old days you had to take the stallion in as public a place as possible so everypony knew who he belonged to.
>Now you wait to strike.

>Be Anon
>The villain Nightmare Moon has been stalking you for the past few hours.
>Horsescan’tintohiding.jpeg
>You’re okay with it cause dat flank

>>27576876
>Thus leading to him running away, burning everything screaming about skin-walkers.
/k/ommandos by and large don't give a shit about the /x/-files

>>27577014
You could swing it in any number of different ways.

For example, maybe the time she comes from didn't have enough ponies living to adulthood to worry about gender roles, they just needed everyp0ne to work all the time just to survive. Or maybe it meant that all the stallions were essentially locked in their bedrooms until they were sold off to stud at about eight, and from there on in they spent their lives locked in their wifes' bedrooms.

Or maybe the current state of gender roles is because of a curse, laid down by Sombra or Tirek or something, to encourage female births. They did it to prove that mares can't do things as well as stallions, or because they're evil, or because they wanted all the mares to themselves when they ascended to become God-Emprah of p0nekind.

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>>27577054
>You were occupied with buying some veggies in the market when you felt a heavy weight hit your back.
>Before you could even react you were on the ground with Nightmare Moon straddling your thighs and her tongue trying its best to go down throat.
>Maybe this is how they said hello back in the old days here.
>Despite the confusion you weren’t too averse to this, even though you heard some gasps of shock from the now some twenty ponies watching on in terror.
>Damn she was a good kisser.
>And now’s she’s dry humping you.
>Note to self: ask her out to dinner once she done.

>>27577133
Culturally behind-the-times NMM doesn't know you must buy him dinner first.

A modern stallion must be properly wined and dined before fucking his dick off.

Courting rituals have changed.

>>27577187
Then she finds out all the new sex positions that ponies have come up with in modern times, and finds herself willing to go that extra mile for a stallion's D.

>>27577133
>Luna comes from a time when gender roles were even more brutal
Probably not very practical historically. I think back in the 1000's IRL people worked regardless of gender because they'd die of starvation otherwise
I'm willing to assume that ponies have been in a golden age since pre-banishment if for no other reason than the sake of this post
>Anon kisses her back, and Luna/NMM is shocked but willing to put up with such forward actions if it means claiming him as a mate.
>She reasons that she can always punish him later for such insolence
>When Anon gropes her flank, she hops off of him in disgust and declares him a harlot
>Her attempts to get him punished with a month in the dungeons is halted by Celestia

Is this something we haven't done yet? Archaic Luna or archaic pone reacting to modern Anon?

>>27577208
Gender roles in the 1000s only applied to the rich.

Otherwise, the men hunted, plowed, cooked and sewed,

while the women sewed, cooked, plowed and hunted.

>>27577230
That sounds about right. I'd like to think that ponies haven't been in a state like that for thousands of years; not just one thousand years. Having the rulers of your nation live for centuries has got to do wonders for social stability.

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>>27577247
In this ponyverse of mine I like the idea that there's a commune of bohemian ponies elsewhere that practice 'democracy' and somehow, despite infighting and bickering and everything else, it shambles onward.

Like, it's a back-of-the-hand joke in the newspapers and everything. 'Local weirdos elect ANOTHER leader, the group have released a statement saying everything is OK and hope she lasts longer than her predecessor (yuk yuk yuk). Anyway, about the cool rock this reporter found-'

>>27577230
That is fairly accurate, the simple fact being that unless you were rich there was never an occasion where your gender effected what you would do. Except in certain roles.

An example would be a baker and a blacksmith;

A baker is a occupation where gender isn't a major decider. So chances are the women would also be bakers, until married when they would assist their husbands in their trades (partly through the traditional role of cooking and such but also in other ways).

A blacksmith on the other hand is a thing where upper-body strength is of major importance. Not to mention that since it is a trade whereby the person must enter an apprenticeship at an early age, chances are you would do it for those most suited for the job and those who can continue the family name (therefore male) as it would be an expensive thing.

(There is also the point to raise that generally who ever gets the property through inheritance would've been trained for it's use but that is another matter.)

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>>27577208
>Nightmare Moon is surprised that Anon is more than willing to have sexy times.
>Two days of nothing but the most animalistic and depraved sex she now sees that the old ways are shit.
>Especially when he does that thing to her dock with his grabbers

>>27577373
Dockplay is so underutilized.

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>>27577373
>Anon gets Nightmare Moon to come out of her shell.
>Proceeds to show her how exhilarating having sex in inappropriate places can be.
>Celestia tries to keep a straight face while in day court while he she hears screams of pleasure from behind her throne.
>”Come now Anon, normally we would have to threaten a stallion with the dungeon for anal.”
“Dungeons eh? Want to do it there next?”
>Celestia tries to conceal just how soaked her throne is from all their acts.

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>>27570434
Sleeping with multiple, kitten-sized flying horses.

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>>27577418
>You wake up one morning and find a basket full of tiny mares on your doorstep
>Little orphans who only want a family
>All happily cry out "Daddy" when they see you.

>>27577435
Put them in front of the TV
Then begin walling them in with other TVs
It is a well known fact that the ease of use for a child increases with exposure to televisions.

>all this nightmare moon stuff
I really like the way this thread is going so far.

>>27577472
>Be single dad Anon.
>You were a little concerned with what you were seeing.
>Your six adopted daughters were fighting over the remote again.
>Twilight wanted to watch a documentary, Applejack a rodeo, Rarity the fashion show, Pinkie a cooking show, Flutters a nature show, and Rainbow a destruction derby.
>Grabbing the remote you put on My little Human, each of them stopped fighting and watched in fascination.
>Being a single dad was easy sometimes.

>>27577133
>>27577373
>Nightmare Moon likes this new attitude stallions have.
>Stallions that don't just sit there and look handsome?
>Stallions that aren't complete prudes.
>A stallion always up for sex?
>Truly Equestria had entered a golden age during her banishment.
>After a few months she's back thinking about having a harem.
>Secretly investigates all of the stallions in Ponyville and Canterlot.
>They pretty much live up to their old reputation.
>Turns out it hadn't changed, Anon was just different.
>Turns out NMM liked mares but with dicks.
>By virtue of being exactly what she wanted,
>Anon and NMM remain monogamous.

>>27577435
I'm not normally down with cute marshmallow horses but god fucking dammit that's adorabe

>>27577435
>Anon is in Equestria for a couple of years
>Not a horsefucker b/c different strokes for different folks
>Locals of Ponyville wonder worry about Anon: he's lives all by himself and he's never been cuddle-buddies with any mares
>The isolation must be killing him!
>The answer is obvious
>Anon wakes up to loud knocking on his door
>When he goes to answer, nopony's there
>About to dismiss it as a pegasus fucking around with him, Anon almost misses the basket on the ground
>A months-old filly is tucked in and is chewing on an envelope that has the words, "please give me a good home" on it
>"Dah-daddy?"
inb4 cocksocking

>>27577230
I think men predominantly did the hunting but otherwise that is correct.

>>27577654
>Anon brings the filly to a good home.
>Obviously someone mistook his house for an orphanage.

>>27577654
>Anon decides to give them a good home.
>The best home in town is that swanky castle the princess has, so he leaves the foal there.
>Good deed for the day complete!

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>>27577712
>Anon raises all six the best he can.
>They grow up thinking stallions are supposed to act like their daddy.
>End up disappointed since most stallions are prissy little bitches.
>Turns out Anon raised them to all be successful young mares who make all the stallions flee in terror.
>He couldn’t be more proud.

>>27573763
>You are Fleur, the most terrified former assassin in Equestria
>Who knows how long Sweetie Drops was watching?
>You, Anon, sitting together, eating breakfast
>It didn't paint a good picture
>There's no way you'd ever convince her to back down, either
>She'll only stop with a direct order from Princess Luna
>Evading your fellow agent's assassination attempts will be the easy part
>Luna hasn't trusted your word since the Stalliongrad incident
>How were you supposed to know those colts were really Kirin agents?

>You are Anon
>You wonder if you should start doing background checks on your customers

>You are Agent Sweetie Drops
>And you know there's only one way to kill a pony
>Or apelien, in this case
>When he comes home, he's in for a big surprise

>>27577921
> Deploy the ghost sheet costume

>>27577961
She has no proper chains to rattle so she clinks her keychain.

>>27578064
>Fleur tries to push Anon out of the way, but is too spooped to do anything
>Anon responds by picking up and cuddling Bon Bon against her will
>She's been compromised as an agent and has to team up with Fleur and Anon to escape Luna's punishments

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>Be Lt. Anonymous, 52nd Panzer Division, Humania
>Your nation has always been at odds with Equestria
>Where Equestria is mainly rural, yours is industrial
>Where their leaders are immortal royalty, yours are democratically elected mortals
>Where their gender roles are reversed, yours are normal
>Or at least that's how you see it
>Princess Luna didn't see it that way, when she called President Putin a harlot for wearing socks to a diplomatic meeting
>One thing led to another and another, and now your nations are at war
>It honestly wouldn't be so bad, if not for the locals
>"Hey there soldier-boy, wanna come with me and fight a real war?"
>"Ugh, just look at those ugly outfits! What I wouldn't give for an hour with their uniform designer..."
>"Hey! I've never seen weapons like that before, is it some kind of crossbow?"
>You swear, you're going to shoot one of these chucklefucks sometime

>>27578539
Yes.

>>27578539
No

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>>27578539
>war
Yes please, with either extra violence or extra cuddles

http://pastebin.com/xdypi0PQ

>>27578539
>>27578567
>>27578583
Maybe?

>>27572614
Fucking Dubai.

>>27578597
I don't know

>>27578539
Daily life in human-occupied ponyville

>>27578597
No, it could be a fun concept but would devolve into either cringe or edge/dark shit. So no.

Humans deal with war pretty easily, first sanctions, if that fails, troops and an attacking force of humans wont use hugs and blankets to subdue ponies, they'll use guns and things that go boom and kill. So let's not and let this idea die.

>>27578539
No means no Texan.

>>27578583
Yes. This has great potential.

>>27578539
Do SoldierAnon being sent to occupied Ponyville because why not.
The war is not the focus, but Anon being a soldier trying to cope with the local populace.
Think USA in France or something.

>>27578636
Some dark themes =/= Edgy
Please leave.

>>27578650
No it doesn't. Stop baiting. Besides 99% of this board doesn't have the knowledge of actual military life which believe me is cringe inducing when read.

>>27578636
We have an agent Bon Bon trying to off Anon being posted in here.
Hell, Anon killed a griffon in it.
How is that not edgy?

>>27578670
Okay. Let's say I'm planning on writing a military-fic (non-pone) for a reason.

How would you describe daily activities and combat.

>>27578678
I'm not even following it, dropped it the moment Bons "disposed" of the body. If you want a war green make a thread for it, it has absolutely nothing to do with rgre

>>27578670
Then use movies as a basis.
If nobody knows what it's like then go for the next best thing.

>>27578660
Most of the kids who try to write dark don't know how to do that without stupid edge. People who want dark will lap it up regardless of how shit it is.

For as much as I hate marshmellow pone, I'll take that over dick jerking edge or misanthropic woe is humanity posting.

>>27578670
>Besides 99% of this board doesn't have the knowledge of actual military life which believe me is cringe inducing when read.
This. Whenever I've seen it done it's just utter shit.

>>27578683
I would suggest you go read some history, watch some and watch documentaries that don't focus on the ra ra splosions and great men shit.

>>27578657
This would be hilarious.

>>27578697
It has if it has RGRE in it you doofus.

>>27578698
>Then use movies as a basis.
This is a retarded idea.

>If nobody knows what it's like then go for the next best thing.
Hollywood doesn't get things right and you want to base what you're doing off of that?

>>27578683
Which part?
The mornings where you go to muster and deal with officer bullshit and find out who got arrested during the night.
The pt where you have fat pork chops who can't do a pull up to save their life but you can't put paperwork on them cause they suck their gunnys dick.
How about the after actions where a majority of the planning was done by a bunch of fuckups who shouldn't be trusted with a fork.

You have to be specific.

>>27578657
Yes, fuck the nay sayers>>27578539

>>27578700
>I would suggest you go read some history, watch some and watch documentaries that don't focus on the ra ra splosions and great men shit.
I quite literally have an entire bookshelf full of books that might as well include every single event that happened in the entirety of WWII, but not a single one talks about daily life.

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ITT: Craaaawling in my skiiiiin...

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>>27578678
>>27578697
Actually, that's all non-canon now. I went back and started a rewrite from the moment Bonbon attacks Anon. I'm trying to keep it darkly comedic without being edgy.
Now stop all this arguing or I'm gonna smack a bitch.

Now, I know nobody wants to read a fedora tipping edgefest of a story, but I think we should approach anons who want to write a dark story a bit more intelligently. Instead of shitting on them because it will most likely be horrible, let them try, then shit on them when it (almost invariably) becomes shit. Then we will occasionally get a good story that examines darker themes in an RGRE setting, which would actually be quite interesting if done right.

>>27578733
ITT: Retards calling everything with war/horror in it edgy.

>>27578657
So, ponies sucks. Humans took over?

>>27578720
It's not for me, if you like it cool.
>doofus
Strangely I'm not even mad about being called that, you're a good person anon

>>27578734
But Bon Bon using muh power tools to dispose of a body is my favorite part.

>>27578725
Could go with the hilariously classical and inaccurate OORAH USA USA HUMANITY FUCK YEAH route, and have the soldiers and officers be absolutely sick of it since it's being thrown at them from every angle possible.

>>27578539
Anon, now is not the time for war stories. Some prick wanted to start one and he turned out to be a huge whiny faggot, so now the thread has a bad taste in its mouth in regards to war green.

>>27578739
>let them try
But they don't. They just want others to write their ideas.

>>27578739
This is a nuanced argument, what are you doing here?

>>27578742
Eh, could be war on multiple fronts or that the war is already ending.
Let the reader decide on that.

I mean, we could buff up unicorn magic to be as deadly as rifles/artillery if we wanted to, but that's not the main focus here.
They could be allies for all I care.

>>27578731
Go watch Gunner's Palace. It's a good day-to-day snapshot of being deployed. It doesn't glamorize anything and it doesn't moralize either.

Restrepo is good, but it's probably a bit intense for what you're asking.

Also, daily life can mean a lot of different things. Daily life for who and when?

>>27578754
I now want RGRE Treehugger coming on to soldiers like a cute hippy drug dealer. But nam style.

>>27578727
Probably none of the ones you listed. I'm talking about daily life- the routine. What happens?

Excuse me, but I know nothing about military life;
You wake up, eat breakfast, small rest time, drills, exercise.. etc? What do you actually do.

>>27578741
ITT: Edgefags going through their goth phase

>>27578783
>What do you actually do.

I've served in a conscription based army.
There's usually a whole lot of nothing all day, and if you have to get somewhere, you run there as fast as possible and wait.

>>27578741
Been to war it's not edgy and most certainly not like anything the movies make it out to be.
It's almost all hours of briefs for ten minutes of actually doing things. If someone wants to write go ahead, but it's not my cup of tea.

Its like listening to a professor talking about war when all he's known is the shit he got taught when he was in school.

>>27578758
Then why bother telling to stop? If there just going to piss about with ideas then what's the problem

>>27578741
Senseless violence is edgy, Anon and war is the very definition of senseless violence.

>muh warz n sheet
Go make a general if that's what you want. If not that, then go over to Technology. They do some war shit over there. Hell, go to AiE where they straight up don't care what you post so long as it's Anon in Equestria.

We don't want this stupid cringe shit here.

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>>27578794
So these authors all wrote edgy shit?

>>27578774
Honestly if I'd write about YA GI SOLDA BOI it'd be something like Anon has to guard UN embassy in Canterlot. The office needs a full staff of armed guards due to dumb protocols. It requires a lot of standing around and looking good in a uniform. Equestrians won't do anything to harm anyone, so it's pointless but Anon has to play his serious role when in duty.

>>27578815
Isn't there a ww1 but with ponys thread already?

>>27578813
War is most of the time absolutely nerve-wreckingly boring, and the rest of it is pants shitting terror.

Mostly you're just bored though.

Three more months of this shit.

>>27578823
Yup. Edgar was in it for the edge life. Mary was a wanna be horror buff, and Bram was a straight up fag.

>>27578832
>Guard mares hitting on UN soldiers, thinking they're just eye candy.
>Technically to them they are, but have gone through a hard and long training to get there.

I like this idea.

>>27578823
>"This painting is awful. You can't draw a cat worth shit."
>>"OH YEAH?! Well <world-renowned artist> drew a cat! Is HE b-bad at painting t-too?! A BLOO BLOO BLOO"

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>>27578839
And then it'll die along with Flutterrape and AIE?
FINALLY!

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>>27578839
Don't blame summer.

>>27578783
What I listed is the day to day.

0500: wake up shit/shower/shave
0530: pt(physical training) with the other occifers. One sees a gator in the little marsh and tries to fuck with it.
0545: waiting on the ambulance to pick up the retard with a degree in engineering
0630: head to work
0700: muster and accountability
0730: one guys missing, turns out he's in the drunk tank for breaking into a closed store and pissing in the slurpee machine
0800: speak with the co about both retards
0830: head to armory for weapon cleaning
0845: bash head against cement wall because the guys at the armory are fucking idiots
1100: lunch and rethink life
1230: pt with the platoon
1330: go shower and go back for knowledge time
1430: safety brief about not fucking with gators
1530: secure the place and begin on reports
1800: head home and drink oneself to sleep

Rinse and repeat

>>27578857
>>27578823
People are just saying that war & horror is edgy, they're not complaining about quality.

*Cough* *Cough* >>27578849

>>27578873
How's high school?

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>>27578839
Think we can shift the subject from war and edges to minotits?
If tits won't get the school kids to stop the edge fest then I don't know what will

Fuck, if you need war in your ponies just go read the XCom MLP crossover fic on FIMFiction.

>>27578859
Yet its still around.

>>27578883
It's the summer. He's not in high school. That's the problem.

>>27578890
Link? Because if it's 'Stardust' it's shit.

>>27578873
No, it's definitely summer in here. This thread was not like this at all a month ago.

>le moot infographic
Don't even fucking care. Everyone who spends time on this site knows that summer is a shit show except for the kids who just show up during summer and assume it's always like this.

Also? /v/ a shit.

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Do a war story with Nyx in it!
It will be glorious!

>>27578906
We've had serious shitposting way back in the middle of the fucking winter.
Summer doesn't do as much as you think, although during it shitposting tends to increase in /b/ and /v/.

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>>27578885

>>27578885
>implying any writefag would post in this shitstorm

>>27578919
Defiantly /pol/ too. As soon as Summer kicks in the normally 50% shitposting-amount boosts up to at least 90%.

>>27578885
>>27578924
>giant glorious cowtits
>tiny pic
No.

>>27578919
Tell yourself whatever you need to, man. This place was not like this a month ago. It wasn't like this two months ago. And so on and so on.

It gets like this around Christmas when the kids are on break, but then it calms down again.

If you're going to describe military life, then from what I've read, there's a few things that everybody misses.

>Days to weeks of doing absolutely nothing, broken by seconds of frantic not-dying and dying killing and not-killing, followed by another unknown amount of time doing nothing.

>Getting disturbingly used to the bombshells ringing outside the bunker/trench you and your glorious leader are holding out in.

>Traveling, setting up camp, breaking camp, traveling more.

>Bodies everywhere.

>The indescribable smell of death

>Being surrounded by fucking assholes everywhere and wondering what the fuck this brotherly camaraderie shit is

>Your commanders risking your life for the sake of his career advancing.

>>27578912
Use that piece of shit as a mine detector.

>>27578944
This isn't world war 2 era.

>>27577921
>You're trying to make sense of this situation, so you must be Fleur
>Okay, start from the beginning
>Anon is almost certainly innocent, at least of intent
>Agent Sweetie Drops, the hardest hardflank in the company, thinks you're both traitors
>You have to contact and convince Princess Luna that neither of you are threats
>And you still need to shower all this dry cum off
>Eugh

>And now you're Anon
>You hope Whatshername doesn't mind you leaving while she's in the shower
>But you really need to open your shop for the day
>And maybe work on a new business policy
>As soon as you open the door, a wave of heat hits you, along with the stink of burning cigarettes

>You are Agent Sweetie Drops
>Anon is approaching the shop, so you get to work on your trap
>There's thing Anon can't possibly survive
>You've used this against griffons, minotaurs, seaponies
>You know a mare who used a pile of it to neutralize an entire platoon of breezie berserkers
>You adjust your gas mask, light a match, and toss it into the basket
>The dried herbs go up in an instant, a grey plume of deadly smoke billowing into the enclosed shop space
>Mere moments later, you hear his keys in the lock
>The handle turns, and a

>You are Anon, and you can't stop coughing
>It smells like your grandpa's living room in here!
>You squint to keep the smoke out of your eyes as you venture inside
>There's a low, deep breathing sound coming from behind the counter, where you see a smoldering basket of herbs
>Glancing at the partially-burned label, you realize it's tobacco
>Dammit, you had to import that!
>Whatever anti-smoker pony did this is gonna pay
>Exactly 342 bits, which is how much you would've sold it for
>As you cough, a black masked pony head peeks above the countertop
>God dammit

I'll stop if people want to. Jeez.

>>27578944
>Being surrounded by fucking assholes everywhere and wondering what the fuck this brotherly camaraderie shit is

Chances are everyone around you thinks that about you too.

>>27578944
All of those are literally the tropes everyone uses to play the muh realzm card.

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>>27578926
I'm just trying to guide the storm to something more compatible with our usual content
>>27578939
By all means post better. I lost my old folder some time ago

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>>27578964
No, please. More.

>>27578964
Keep going faget. I want to read how BonBon will fail in her assassination attempts.

>>27578964
The bitching started from actual war time guy>>27578539
I am enjoying your story regardless what the edge hating faggots say.

>>27578964
Keep going we need the content to survive the summer

>>27578767
Hoping to encourage potential writefags to try on the off chance they make something good and trying to reduce the amount of shitposting. Personally I think people complaining about edgy stuff is even worse than getting the occasional shitty RGR edgequestria green. At least that stuff has potential to be good, but a shitpost is always a shitpost.

>>27578964
>Anon salvages the unburnt portions, rolls it into cigar(ette)s or puts it into his grandpappy's pipe and inhales the fumes out in the woods so as not to disturb little ponies' snootles.

>BonBon can't believe her eyes.

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>>27579015
you I like.

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>>27579015
Good point

>>27579015
On the other hand, undisturbed shity edgy stories will no doubt attract more edge lords writing more shitty edgy stories.

>>27579021
>snootles
I'm using this from now on.

>>27578964
Stop

>>27579041
And the shitposts keep pouring like rain.

>>27578964
I'm going to stop reading immediately if Anon doesn't proceed to smack Bonbon upside the head for that shit.

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>>27579066
Fuck you.

>>27579015
I like you

>>27579041
This Anon has a point. We should give constructive criticism though, instead of shitposting hard.

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>>27579041
The stories never get beyond third chapter so there's nothing to be concerned about.

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>>27578885
>You are Anon, and you do not regret going to this diner for lunch.
>"What can get for cutie? To have milk, yes?"
>Oh, Eastern-European cow people
>Never stop being Eastern-European.
>The cow is bent over the counter to be at eye-level with you on your intentionally short seat.
>The shirt she's wearing is just barely holding her breasts back.
>You can actually hear the sounds of stitching snapping as she puts the weight of her tits on the front of her shirt.
>"Fresh? Is good warm."
>Whatever you say, cow person.
"Yes, please."
>The lewd smile is all you need to see in order to know that you've said the right thing.
>The minotaur leans back up and stands at her full height.
>You can see every detail of her nipples bleeding through the thin garment
>Each and every inch of puckered skin on that fist-sized circle off flesh.
>The minotaur bends to the side to grab something, giving you a nice flash of underboob.
>Your erection could cut diamonds right now.
>When she turns to face you, she has a quill and parchment in hand and is writing something down.
>Her arms are tucked around the sides of her breasts as she writes, making the round bags of flesh jiggle with every stroke of her quill.
>Her ample chest bounces and jumps so fluidly that it's obvious that she isn't wearing any kind of support; not that you didn't already know that.
>With a final, dramatic flurry of her quill, the minotaur hands you a torn-off section of her parchment.
>In broken English (Equish?), she's written what looks like an address, a sketch of her house, and instructions on how to get there from here.
>"I am to go home after dinner."
>She points out a picture of a clock that's set to 7pm.
>"You come at clock-number. Is ready time."
>You quickly pay for your meal and leave, but not before looking back at the minotaur over your shoulder.
>You watch as she talks animatedly with another minotaur cow, ending their conversation with raucous laughter, a high-five, and a chest bump.
>Not bad.

>>27578964
Don't mind the summer heat, friendo

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Such quality posts and discussion.

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>>27579041
They write a chapter or two them give up and piss off.

If we keep up posts on non edge we will keep the edge lords to a minimum and they will fade before the month is out

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>>27579108
Yessss

>>27579133
>pic
Just explain to her that she's gonna need bigger tits if she wants to be your cow. Then she can go off and have an animoo huehue training session, get better, and come back to be your waifu.

>>27579108
Please tell me more of your publication and where I might subscribe.

*The handle turns, and Anon opens the door
>>27578964
>You are Agent Sweetie Drops, and everything is going according to plan
>Of all the poisons Anon stocks, tobacco is the most potent
>How he got it, you don't know
>It's banned as a chemical weapon
>Even the company has a hard time getting stocks of it
>Now, with Anon in his death throes, you can't help but crack a smile
>Mission accomplished
>And then Anon ripped off your gas mask

>You have a slightly increased risk of lung cancer, so you must be Anon
>This fuckheaded pony decided to burn your tobacco!
>That shit's expensive!
>You reach over the counter to grab them, wrapping your fingers around the filter of their mask and pulling
>The pony doesn't come with it
>Your eyes widen at the sight, then immediately shut when you get an eyeful of smoke
>Bonbon?!
>Squinting again, you can see her grabbing at her throat and wheezing
>Damn ponies, smoke inhalation is not a joke!
>Grabbing her by the tuft, you drag her outside into the fresh air
>She's not breathing!

>You are Fleur
>Anon isn't here
>You searched the entire suite after you got out of the shower, but he doesn't seem to be present
>Panicking, you head down the stairs and out into the street
>There's a cloud of smoke billowing into the sky down the road, so you start running
>Oh Celestia, don't let you be too late!

>>27578992
That was me too. I remember reading about some idiots flirting with a female soldier and thought it'd make an interesting RGRE idea. Sorry if it's too edgy.

>>27579108
Cow tits is of yes

now just make it more RGRE

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>>27579167
Carful you will make cow sad

>>27579172
It was perfect and I want moar!

>>27579167
http://pastebin.com/u/AnalPlugAnon
Don't tell anyone I'm here

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>>27579215
Just post minotits green and I won't tell anyone you're here

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>>27579108

>>27579215
GET EM BOYS! Wait I mean, GET EM GIRLS!

>>27579215
Keep it up, friendo. I won't tell anyone ur sekretz.

>>27579186
I just want her to be the best and biggest breasted cow she can be. Maybe she can get a trainer, so she could be super fit and super busty?

>>27579226
No-can-do, friendo. It's time to work the night shift

>>27579230
You can't catch me when I'm at my shitty job

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>>27579215
>>27579230
Attack! Teat twist em!

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>>27579041
Alright so if I were to write darker stuff but it'd be like Metal Slug, would that be acceptable?

>>27579172
Better focus on one story at a time, if you don't, you'll never finish any at all.

>>27579288
How Sluggy we going here? I am good with it either way.

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>>27579274
>work
Sorry to hear that, mang.

>>27579172
YES! MOAR!

>>27579172
>>27579194
samefagging?

>>27579288
>cross-overs
No.

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>>27579269
But she will never be the best no cow will
>>27579274
You say that like it will stop you

>>27579307
Negative

>>27579288
Please god no

>>27579315
Not a cross over. It has death and explosions and everything but it's very light-hearted and carefree at the same time.

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>>27577435
>>27577752
Are they fillies or grown mares pretending to be fillies?

>>27579340
You could do it the way we had war stories in the past.
Instead of real war it's a giant pillow fight
Instead of death they are tucked in for a nap

>>27579340
>It has death and explosions
Why are you so persistent in putting this edgy stuff into your stories?
Because that makes them seem more real and shit?

>>27579373
Pillow wars have been done to death. I'd rather have stupid edge than stupid fluff wars. Although I'd rather have minotits than either of the above.

Instead of just saying how bad an idea it could be I just wrote some to see if it could be done -edge.
***
>Arriving in the land of horses was a horrifying to say least.
>One day you were out on a typical morning run to keep that cardio strong.
>Now you were working as a clerk at the post office, because colts were not meant to do heavy labor.
>Your years of dealing with paperwork in the corps made you an efficient machine and you were proud to say you helped in its efficiency.
>Everything was good, except…
>”Ooops”
::CRASH!!::
>”My bad”
>Fucking Derpy, that horse caused destruction on a scale you’ve never before witnessed.
>Looking back from the counter you saw several boxes and bags of letters spilled and covering her.
>Her head and ditzy eyes the only thing visible.
>That was going to take a while to clean up that’s for sure.
“You okay?”
>”Heh heh, I’m fine.”
“Good, clean it up and get ready for your deliveries.”
>How this mare still had her job was beyond you.
>Oh well, her clumsiness didn’t affect your paycheck and as long as she didn’t break the parcels you wouldn’t catch hell for it.
>The door chime made you turn back to the front.
>Princess Sparkle, she’s the one who got you this gig.
>”Good morning Anonymous how’s everything coming?”
>You were about to respond when
::CRASH::
>”Ow”
>The look you gave her was a combination of “please end my suffering” and “my life is nothing but pain”
“How can I help you today?”

>>27579407
>Might as well get her taken care of before you went back to clean up the latest disaster.
>You were once a lieutenant, eager to prove yourself and make your family proud.
>Now you were just a post office clerk who dealt with a child in a mares body on a daily basis.
>”I just need this box sent to Neigh York.”
>With her horn glowing a box floated out of her saddle bags and settled on the counter in front of you.
>”Overnight if it’s possible.”
>Writing down all the necessary info on a slip you stuck it on the box and placed it off to the side.
>”You still haven’t said how you’re doing.”
“I’m fine… I think. I’d rather do something a little more active, but a jobs a job.”
>”Well I did hear Rarity is looking for a few models so” you cut her off before she could continue.
“I meant something with a little more along the lines of the guard.”
>Twilight looked a bit sheepish at that.
>”You know that’s a pretty dangerous job, you could apply for the ceremonial guard in Canterlot.”
>Those stallions were a joke.
>Might as well be pony versions of the Commandants Own.
>You wanted to get your hands dirty, not die of boredom polishing a set of armor.
“Thanks but no thanks. You’re all set, the package should make it there by tomorrow.”
>Saying your goodbye Twilight departed.
>Taking a deep breath you turned to assess the carnage.
>It looked like a damn badger had an all-nighter in the back.
>Derpy was out-cold on a bed of letters with a bad lump on her noggin.
>Yup, you got stuck with the clean up. Again.
>Reaching into the drawer you pulled a medicine bottle and fished out a couple of aspirin, two for you and two for her.
>Looks like the deliveries were going to be delayed yet again.

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>>27579326
She's an acceptable choice over best girl. Hell, there's no reason not to grab them both.

>>27579340
This idea makes no sense.

>>27579418
>Popping the pills and downing them with some water from your bottle you got up and began the clean up.
>Picking up the clumsy mare you set her down on the couch in the back room. Placing the two extra pills and a glass of water on the side table for when she woke up.
>It took about an hour to tidy up, all the while stopping to help the ponies that came in.
>This was your life now, though it could have been worse.

***
So how's that?

>>27579344
Nope they're fillies, cute, huggable little fillies.

>>27579382
Good fucking grief. if you were alive when authors like Stephen King and H.P. Lovecraft released some of their early work, then you would've bitched and called every single one of them an edgy faggot, wouldn't you?

Let him write a part of the damn story and see how it is. Who knows, maybe it'll be good in its own way?

>>27579439
Very good, been wanting to see someone write an Anon with desire to go do something else.

>>27579456
>le known authors meme
Yeah, trying to favorably compare green to actual published authors is a tactic that has worked precisely zero times in the history of 4chins.

Green and prose are different things and people consume them in different ways for different reasons.

tl;dr - Nobody wants your popcorn flavored steak, nigga.

>>27579485
Bitch I made popcorn flavored steak and it was great!

>>27579500
No, anon, it really wasn't.

>>27579507
You have no taste.

>>27579485
Please. Save your assblasted rage for AFTER someone posts edgy shit if you don't like it.
No sense in raging against something that isn't even here yet.

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>>27579439
So far so good
>>27579421
You posted third best pic is best

>>27579507
Uh oh. It's the taste police.

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>>27579485
At least post good pics with your wine. I know your trying to fight the summer shits but don't get to there level of distracting shit post

>>27579456
>Stephen King and H.P. Lovecraft
yeah, they were edgy faggots, still are edgy faggots, and weren't making my little pony fanfiction on 4chan in a special snowflake thread.
I just want my Reversed Gender Roles, but this is literally like all the other special snowflake-aie threads and the original idea dies and slowly turns into aie.

>>27579326
>>27579421
>>27579521
It's happening. OH GOD IT'S HAPPENING!

Someone please inform me when MonMusu threads aren't completely devolved into hating on different girls. But enough of that.

Let's have some more actual RGRE here.

>>27579558
>the original idea dies and slowly turns into aie
I miss the days when I could just lurk one single thread for all my green needs.

>>27579521
>You posted third best pic is best
I will accept a herd of all three girls.

>>27579558
Oh please. Stop being so dramatic over this. This gets brought up sometimes but no green ever comes out of it. Average stallion cry baby.

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>>27579558
>like all the other special snowflake-aie threads and the original idea dies and slowly turns into aie.
Which is why I bitch when people post shit that doesn't belong in here. And yet, for all that, people complain when you try to keep the thread free of bullshit and on theme.

>>27579594
I've always liked the idea of niche thematic threads.

>pic in no way related

>>27579579
Rachnera is best girl followed by Lala and Suu

>>27579609
The best solution
>>27579579
We are not fighting we are just comparing taste

>>27579640
If people saying they wanna turn a centaur into glue is comparing taste, I want nothing to do with it.

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>>27579661
Cuck memery has completely infested /a/, so of course they're going to lash out at the centaur. Never mind that she and her mom aren't following those fucked up traditions. It's all le cuck posting.

>>27579609
>>You posted third best pic is best

I am still grammatically trying to figure that statement out.

>>27579172
>You're freaking out internally, so you must be Anon
>You don't know what's going on, except that one of your friends isn't breathing
>It's the asscrack of dawn so the street is deserted
>Nopony is around to help
>You look down at her, her cream coat stained by soot, her little hooves twitching involuntarily
>Her perfectly still chest
>You've seen every episode of Scrubs, so you're hideously underqualified to do this
>But you take a deep breath and do it anyway

>You're freaking out externally, so you must be Fleur
>As you near Anon's shop, you catch a whiff of something in the air that makes your nose curl and eyes water
>She didn't...
>Tobacco is only used in operations where collateral doesn't matter
>But here! In the middle of a heavily populated town! To kill one stallion!
>You gasp and wheeze, your hooves carrying you along the cobblestones to where Anon's shop is
>You round the corner, bringing Anon's Apothecary into view
>Smoke billows out the doorway, the thick stench of burning chemicals filling the air
>The windows are blackened, and flames occasionally lick up them
>That stupid nag set the place on fire!
>You'll need another shower to get this accursed smoke from your fine white fur
>In front of the shop, Anon is kneeling over a prone Sweetie Drops
>His lips come down and lock with hers, only for him to rise up, smack her in the chest, and come down again
>You stand there stupefied for a second, before leaping into action

>>27579407
>>27579418
Shit's good.
Write more.

>>27579637
>I've always liked the idea of niche thematic threads
Oh it's nice for the people who like this one thing and only this one thing. But for people like me who enjoy the whole buffet instead of one single dish it means we now have to have trackers or tabs open of several threads at once. Keeping up to date doesn't mean refreshing one page and then scrolling through to what I want, it means updating 10+ fucking different tabs and keeping one open of the catalogue just to know if there are other new niche but overall similar threads that are popping up.

So many threads reach the point of only staying alive via bump posts but everyone wants to stay where they are in their own special snowflake bin until it eventually dies. I know I'm just salty I have to spend so much more time keeping up to date on what used to be super simple, but it feels like there's so little cross breeding of ideas now that threads become stale in a matter of weeks. I'll stop being off topic now.

>>27579737
okay

>>27579439
>Looking at the little filly who was glaring at you and scrunching pretty hard you sat in your seat un-phased.
>Derpy brought her little girl to work today to show her where mommy worked.
>And she didn’t like you, then again you weren’t exactly a big fan of her either.
>But she’s been sitting on top of the counter directly in front you the entire time and stopping you from getting any work done.
>This was becoming a problem. A problem that happily could be fixed.
“Derpy you mind grabbing your cro” you stopped from finishing.
>The old part of you wanted to use the less correct term for offspring.
>But calling a kid crotch-fruit might not go over too well here.
“Mind grabbing your daughter, she looks like she’s going to poop or something.”
>”Heey no I’m not.”
>Says you, you little shit.
>You hated kids, one could go as far and say you detested the buggars.
>Sometimes you just wanted to yell and un-fuck this place, but you knew that wouldn’t fly here.
>Not if you wanted to keep your job.
>And no job means no money, and that translates to no rent or food.
>Both of which make Anon a grumpy marine.
>Had this world any whiskey you would’ve been a hell of a lot happier but you’d play with the hand your dealt.
>”Come here sweetheart and stop bothering Mr. Anon.”
>Sticking her tongue out at you the filly hopped off the counter and trotted to the back to join her mom.
>Thank you whatever god is up there.
>Looking at the clock you noted it was noon. Fuck yeah lunch time.
“I’m going to grab some lunch.” You yelled into the back room.
“I’ll be back in ten.”
>Grabbing your jacket you headed for the door.

>>27579558
>I just want my Reversed Gender Roles
And someone's talking about writing a story that just happens to have war in it. What's the problem?
>hurr durr war is edgy
Nobody gives a fuck about your opinion on war stories. A story here can contain whatever the hell the writer wants, so long as it has that Reversed Gender Roles thing in it.

>>27579759
>You’d only be out for ten minutes, there is no possible way that your coworker could possibly cause too much trouble in ten minutes.

>You were wrong.
>So very very wrong.
>She was a force of evil you swear.
>It only took you eight minutes to grab some food and return.
>The entire place looked like a fucking warzone.
>Papers strewn everywhere, the fire extinguishers still spraying their crap everywhere, and several holes in what were perfectly hole-free walls.
>That ceremonial guard job was starting to actually sound good now.
>Fuck your life.
>Why could you have been sent to hell, you heard it’s nice there this time of year.
>Surely the place of ever suffering and horror would be nicer than this.
“Derpy you still alive?”
>A few cough and two ponies stepped out of the back room, both covered in the fire retardant.
>”Were both fine. The microwave is broken though.”

>>27579638
>Rachnera
>Not best girl Mia

>>27579824
Whelp looks like there is no stopping it.

How about this. whoever can make the best thread related content gets to pic who is best girl

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>>27579824
>Mia
Snek is best

>>27579796
god damn it, derpy. IT WAS 10 MINUTES!

>>27579733
>Your life is flashing before your eyes, so you must be Agent Sweetie Drops
>Your heartbeat is irregular, you can't breathe, your lungs are shriveling up with smoke inside them
>The bastard won
>You find yourself thinking of Lyra, but she doesn't interest you
>You think of your candy store, and your plans to buy a larger location, and it doesn't interest you either
>You think about Anon, and your chest swells, flooding with love for him
>Wait a second
>You cough, expelling black smoke from your lungs, and crack open your eyes
>The worried faces of Anon and Fleur loom over you
>They saved you...
>Why?

>You are Fleur, the most relieved assassin in Equestria
>Anon is alive, and so is Sweetie Drops
>Losing either of them would've been a blow to you, and made explaining this a lot more difficult
>Down the street, you see a bright red carriage barrelling toward the burning building, which has quickly become an inferno
>He gazes regretfully at the ruin of his business, but smiles when he sees Sweetie Drops is still alive
>His technique was way off, luckily you were trained as a medic before being selected as an assassin
>The three of you sit there in the street as firemares, ponice, and ponymedics begin swarming around you
>Sweetie Drops is secured to a stretcher and pulled into an ambulance
>A blanket is draped around Anon's shoulders, despite his best efforts to shrug it off
>Somepony shoved a cup of coffee into your hooves
>You can't stand the stuff, preferring tea or fine wine, but you still drink it down gladly
>This fiasco is finally over

>>27579824
>>27579848
>>27579849
>>27579638
No, NO!
https://wiki.teamfortress.com/w/images/8/89/Medic_sf13_magic_reac03.wav?t=20131030165006

>>27579884
YAY! SHE LIVED! Now we can extort her into getting Luna to replace our shit.

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>>27579884
>You are Princess Luna, and your rage has turned to a slow, simmering anger
>It's been 24 hours since you've had a report from either Agent Sweetie Drops or Fleur
>You stalk through the halls of the palace, servants and guests making a wide berth around you
>You swear, if you don't hear from them in the next hour, you'll go down there yourse-
>"Your highness?" A mare says, dressed in the uniform of a diplomatic courier
>She hands you a classified scroll and flies off
>You open it and cast a cypher spell on the coded words
>'Dear Princess Luna,' it reads, 'Agents Sweetie Drops and Fleur-de-Lis would like to tender their resignations'
>Thy cheek twitches involuntarily
>'Furthermore, Anon Y. Mous of Ponyville hereby files a claim for compensation from the crown due to damages inflicted on his property during royal operations'
>The fine marble floor beneath thy hooves begins to crack, an intense heat borne of rage swelling within thy royal body
>Thou may'st kill somepony yet
And that's it.

>>27579915
Or becoming a secret agent ourselves!
>>27579888
Would minotits help you feel better?

>>27579965
That would be fun, get close to Luna for the complete set of dark ops ponies.

>>27579963
I am happy to have a ending, but am excited to see more later.

>>27579963
>And that's it.
That's it.
THAT'S IT!? NO! I NEED MORE!
>>27579965
Yes. Please. Minotits. I need to suckle on one. The milk calms my wracked nerves... my hands can barely stop shaking to type on this keyboard.

>>27580044
Then make the minotits green if your dreams

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>>27577654
>Anon goes to the ponice.
>Word spreads that some pony abandoned their child.
>This greatly upsets many ponyville residents.
>A witch-hunt is started.
>The foal is actually Twilight who altered her body.
>She won't turn back for at least a week.
>Celestia is going to be so angry with her.

>"PRINCESSES!"
BOOM!
>"ALICORNS OF THE SUN AND MOON!"
BANG!
>"I HAVE COME! I HAVE COME FOR BATTLE!"
BOOM!
>"I HAVE COME TO RIP THE BONES FROM YOUR FLESH!"
BOOM!
>"I HAVE COME TO FEEL THE WASH OF YOUR BLOOD ON MY FACE! I HAVE COME TO KILL! DESTROY! CONQUER!"
BOOM!
>"SHOW YOURSELVES! SHOW YOURSELVES SO THAT WE MAY ENGAGE IN GLORIOUS COMBAT! COME! LET ME SEE THE STRENGTH WHICH I FOUGHT SO LONG AGO!"
>Canterlot castle, one of the greatest and most lasting structures of ponykind, shook like some shoddy shack in the wind as another explosion sounded off in the distance
>You watched as cracks formed on the stone floors and walls of the hallway, webbing out into smaller and smaller cracks
>There wasn't a single window that wasn't broken or cracked in some way
>There were pieces of glass scenery, some of them having been crafted more than two hundred years ago, laid all along the hallway, destroyed beyond repair
>Through the window you could hear the screaming of ponies; the ones that had either been too stubborn to leave or who the guard hadn't been able to get to in time to evacuate
>You didn't know; it didn't matter
>All you knew was that HE was coming
>Tirek: The Lord of all Evil, the Eater of Souls, The King of Lies, the Vanguard of Destruction
>Pretty much the WORST, most powerful and most evil creature in the history of forever was making his way toward the castle
>He had come to take the magic of Princess Celestia, Princess Luna, and your wonderful, amazing wife Cadence, and he was going to do it even if he had to rip the city off the mountain
>"Captain! Shining! We need to go! WE NEED TO GO RIGHT NOW!"
>Smoked was creeping in through the ruined windows
>Though nearly every building in Canterlot had been carved from the mountain itself it still seemed that the city was burning