Its my birthday Anon XD !!! So why do I feel so empty?

>she's
>not
>real

Who the fuck sticks lollipops on cake.
What the fuck pinkie

>>25849837
you feel empty because you can't wake up inside

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>>25849837

>>25849885
CAN'T WAKE UP

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>>25849885
>>25849899

>>25849885


Wake me up inside.

>>25849891
OP here, just fucking kill me right now.

>>25849925


At least your birthday is dubs every year. Little victories.

>>25849935
Y'know what Anon, that actually make me feel a little better. Thank you.

God damn can someone summon PinkieAnon please? The feels are hurting.

>>25849939
Plus it's inevitable that some mad scientist will invent horses for money some day.

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Hey OP don't be so down, it's alright. I'm sure you'll have a great day, you've got all of us and you have pone! We're here for you mang.

>>25849943
Writefag here, are you OP?

>>25849837
Here's your present
https://youtu.be/-HOlB_gdmuk

>>25849837
This actually makes me scared of having birthday.
Just little bit over one month.
Maybe this time I'll have the balls to give myself the golden needle.

Happy Birthday, faggot.

what kind of cake are you gonna eat today?

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>>25849925

>>25849996
*nods*
>>25849960
Thank you :)
>>25850022
So gracious of you XD
>>25849958
Maybe its not so bad?
>>25850077
No cake. Only pasta.

>>25850090
fucking hell dude

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>>25850097
Dont worry I have more

>>25849837
Because you realize that your life will really amount to nothing. That, in a universe 93-220 trillion lightyears long in diameter, nothing your do will matter. As your friends and family wither and die, their names and faces will fade from your memory and all that's left is a vague memory of your time together.
And then you realize the same will happen to your friends and family, and by the time you're dead nobody will know or care who you were. You are an inconsequential drop upon the vast ocean, never to make a large ripple on the surface.

I often times feel the same way, OP. Hope you pull through. Any way we can cheer you up?

>>25850091
It's not what I usually write but if the thread is still here when I get back then I'll try to whip up some AnonPinkie for you today.

>>25850111
Trips have more

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>>25850118
Kinda takes the pressure off, doesn't it?

>>25850227
I cant think of anything off the top of my head, other than carry on being fantastically autistic /mlp/ :)
>>25850301
Thank you very much Mr. Writefriend :)

bump for PinkieAnon writefriend hope

>>25850837

>>25850837

>>25850837

OP here with an update, it appears that the girl I've been crushing on for about 3 years and was one of my best friends has randomly blocked my number and my facebook after no provocation. Should I just end it now and hope I get to Equestria?

>>25852510
>killing yourself over a girl

I really hope you don't do this. Their are better reason, you just have to look harder.

>>25852510
Don't worry about it. You have more best friends, and those are the people that matter most, except maybe your family depending on your relationship with them.

>>25852510
If she does something like that for no reason, OP, she probably was not worth it anyway. There are better reasons for suicide out there. I'd say keep on living for now.

>>25852510
Writefag here again. I'm still busy but I got a little green planned out for you, bud. I'll start and finish the story tonight. pls don't an hero on me, OP.

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MY biggest issue with the idea of suicide to equestria is that you don't think of how your waifu would react. If they ever find out the truth, they would believe they are the reason you commit suicide, blaming themselves, or you deal with the fact that you lie about your past and how you got there.
If an external force kills you and you except it, there is no blame on his or her self.
Suicide is the worst way to go to equestria, because it hurts the people on earth and on equestria, where as allowing yourself to die, but it being caused by an external force (ex:not resisting during murder) would ease more consciences.

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>>25849837
no game = no fame

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Hey it's my birthday too Anon
Lel

>>25852569
>>25852612
>>25852626
I know its dumb but it just feels so soul crushing for so much shit stuff to happen on my birthday.
>>25852691
Bless you writefriend :)

>>25849837
See UnderTale True Pacifist Endng Its has a better lesson, hate if you want, were missing somebody.

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>>25849885

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>>25849885

>>25852510
OP, i know your stronger than that. Its a girl, there's plenty more of them out there. Im here for you if you need me.

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>>25852510
Fucking normie killing yourself over 3dpd but anyway

Don't do it cause if you survive EVERYTHING be worse I tried and failed

>>25852569
>>25852975
And by "better reasons" I mean better reasons to kill yourself.
Doing it over a girl is retarded. Unless it was the love of your life for a number of years and she cheated on you. Then you go murder-suicide.

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>>25849885
Well I've felt empty for a long time because I'm still a fucking virgin and that just totally eclipses literally everything else, and total eclipses cause total darkness.

>>25849885
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6Wq-ku3AwTA

>>25854382
Alrighty OP and others. I've pre-written enough to start posting on here. I'd like to go ahead and explain that this story will be a genre of story that I am completely unfamiliar with. It will be cheesy, unrealistic, and cliched. Ponk is also the hardest character for me to write, so this won't be any legendary one-shot. However, I hope you can enjoy anyways. OP, I hope your birthday is a good one.

>>25854640
Thank you writefriend. It sucked, but hopefully something nice and cheesy will cheer me, and Im sure many others up.

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>>25854640

>>25854640

>the sky was cloudy when you got into your car
>but when you got out later, a torrential downpour had started
>when you got inside, your clothes were wet and nearly soggy all over from the weather
>this, only adding to the gloom of the day
>hoping to slither back without being noticed, you try to be quick once you get inside
>but once you take a few steps, you hear

>"Anon. You're late. AGAIN."
>you fumble for words
"Sorry boss, I jus-"
>"I am /tired/ of your excuses. You're working an extra hour to make up for your tardiness."
"But today is-"
>the boss turns away, his catch already caught
>"An extra hour, Anon!"
>your shoulders slouch, as the hours of mindless work ahead of you glare right into your eyes

>later,

>the day had been winding down as a manager let you leave work an hour early, going against the order from the boss
>it was about the only part of the day that had worked out for you so far

>you got up too late that morning for work
>the shower was ice cold the entire time
>the coffee pot broke once the machine filled it up with the liquid energy
>the same liquid energy that stained your floor
>the same stain you didn't have time to clean up before you left that morning

>work was busier than normal, which meant that your break time was cut in half
>and no one even said anything to you about the day

>because of this certain occasion, these occurrences only made the day worse
>and worse
>and worse

>by the time you got to your car in order to leave, the gloom of the atmosphere had yet to subside

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>>25854382
>not wanting to become a wizard

>>25852510
anon im about to give you some of the best advice you will ever receive so read the next line carefully.

Bitches ain't nothing but hoe's with tricks.

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>>25850111
I wasn't ready for this

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>>25854792
forgot to put on my name

>driving home, you see a grocery store
>with a few dollars in your wallet, you go inside; hoping to find something that might make the day feel a little better

>the store, which feels like a haven, is warm and bright; a wonderful foil to the conditions outside
>you walk around the store for a bit, looking for the bakery
>finally you spot it

>the bakery has an assortment of treats that catch your eye, but a large cupcake steals the show

>there is a woman working behind the counter, who sees what you are looking at
>as you approach,
>"Interested in something?" she asks cheery and bubbly

>you see the price tag below the cupcake and check your wallet
>the wallet contains just enough money to afford the Treat-Yo-Self dessert
pic

>you point to what you want
"I'd like that big cupcake."

>seeing what you pointed at, the bakery lady asks with a smile, "Special occasion?"

>your brain turns to a more sad reality; one that was momentarily pushed aside once you figured out that you could afford the dessert

>you give a sigh as you look away and solemnly say
"It's my birthday."

>>25854382
It doesn't matter anon, none of that stuff matters. As soon as you start focusing on yourself and forgetting about society you will realize just how tramped the average person is.

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>>25854894

>the lady seems to not pick up on your mood, as her smile becomes even brighter
>"Well happy birthday, sir!"
>her demeanor somewhat falters as she thinks for a moment

>"But.. wouldn't you rather have a birthday /cake/ instead? A cupcake won't fill many mouths, you know.."
>already tired from your day at work; just wanting to go home
>let down by all of the things that went wrong, you don't even bother to hide how your circumstance
"It's a party of one," you drone out

>her smile wanes into sadness; her eyes giving silent pity to you
>"I.. I see."

>she looks at the fresh cupcake on display, then back to you
>by her face alone, you can feel the sympathy; sympathy you just didn't want
>she grabs the large cupcake that was on display and gives it to you over the counter
"How much?"

>she shakes her head and talks with a little less volume
>"I'm not supposed to do this..."
>she pauses, then with a remnant of a smile,
>"...but I hope you have a good birthday."

>you look at her with the big dessert now in your hand
>she takes a few dollars out of her own pocket and places them in the register
"Are... are you sure about this? I have enough money for it.."

>she warmly nods, then proceeds to shoo you out of the store
>"Now go on, before the manager sees this."

>you quickly walk away, happily surprised by her kindness

>>25854951

>the rain outside didn't seem to bother you anymore, as long as the hand covering your treat kept the rain off of the cupcake

>you get to your place and dry off
>open the pantry, looking for food that would quiet the stomach-growling
>the only thing you have are noodles
>it was a staple of your diet at this point, but it did the job well enough

>you sigh, wishing you could eat a little better; if only on your birthday
>but a heartfelt grin washes over your face as you see the big cupcake on your counter
"Maybe dinner won't be so bad after all..."

>you throw away the broken coffee pot and try to scrub out the stain on the floor before eating

>you decide to eat your meal in front of your computer, catching up on YouTube videos you had been meaning to watch
>after the main course, the cupcake was halfway devoured
>it wasn't the best dessert you had ever eaten
>but it was free, and you had no complaints about that

>as a few hours wore on, you ran out of videos to watch in your subscription box

>you look around your room for something to do, but nothing catches your eye

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>>25850111

>>25854894
Oh wow Im honored! I was following Homecoming Anon for the longest time and Im such a big fan!

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>>25850111
Has feel gone too far?

>>25855024
Oh my, oh my, this is great! Waiting for pone to come :3

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>>25855024

>out of boredom, you pull out your phone

>2 New Messages
>open one

>["Hi honey, it's your mother. Just wanted to wish you a happy birthday today. I was going to call and sing you 'happy birthday' but I thought that I would spare your eardrums from the torment. Have a lovely day."]

>your mom really couldn't sing at all, so you laughed a little and mumbled to yourself
"Thanks mom."

>1 New Message
>open it
>it's from an old friend

>["Hey Anon, I know it's been a while since we talked. I wanted to surprise you and hang out today but the girlfriend really wanted to go ice skating. We'll hang out another time, I promise."

>you put your phone down and simply look at the last message for a while
>he used to be one of your best friends in school, and now you rarely saw each other
>he had the girlfriend and the cooler car and almost everything you didn't

>it accurately reflects how your life has been for the past few years
>all of your friends went their separate ways and whenever you wanted to hang out, they were always busy
>meanwhile you seemingly couldn't push far forward with your own life

>the thought drives your mind starts going to dark places again
pic
>your life was unfolding in a way that you had never expected
>the future just didn't seem as bright as it used to
>you didn't find yourself as happy as you used to be

>desperate for some kind of relief from the emptiness in your chest, you think back to things that made life bearable back in the day
>video games always helped, but you didn't feel like playing
>women could be fun, but no one was interested in you anymore

>then a thought brought you out of the darkness
>a sliver of hope

>>25850111
My god...
Seriously, where do you get these?

>>25850111

>not Applejack

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>>25850091
All those emoticons... Please stop.

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>>25855241

>you get a bag out of your closet, full of MLP toys

>your friends used to poke fun at you for liking the show, but when they warmed up to it,
>they gave you a few of the toys as a friendly joke
>you bought fast food meals for a week to get the rest of the Mane 6

>you lay down on your bed belly-down and look at them
>you think of all of the fun times you had back when you watched MLP
>the times you saw the episodes on YouTube; even a few times you saw the shows on TV
>the laughs and smiles you had because of the show would most likely have been forgotten, if not for these little toys

>a part of your mind keeps repeating

>"They're not real."
>"They're not real."
>"They're not real."

>a sadness starts to seep into your pores and burrow a heaviness in your heart
>but you put that sadness away before it surrounds you again
>flashbacks of old episodes replace your sadness with scenes from old episodes

>you think about old episodes, on the bed, in your room,
>on your birthday

>alone

"Dammit..."
>you say, looking at one of the toys in particular
pic
>a small breeze of wind goes through your room, but it goes unfelt by your senses
"..I wish I could talk to you.."

>a small voice behind you says
>"What would you say?"

>>25854382
Havew never understood this sentiment.
I also listen to certain friends go on and on about finding sex however they can.
It's degenerate as fuck.

Asexual master race.
My hand and imagination does everything I need.

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>>25855792

>as fast as lightning, you turn around on your bed to see the intruder
>when you see her, you literally fall out of your bed and onto the floor

>she smiles with her big blue eyes and with a far more cheery voice yells out
>"SURPRISE!!!"

>confetti drops from your ceiling as she blows on the noisemaker, causing not only a sight but quite the commotion of noise

>with manic speed, you get to your feet and backpedal into the wall; trying to put distance between yourself and your hallucination
>your eyes practically shoot out of their sockets

>"Hi! I'm-"

>you look at her like you've seen a ghost, still pushing against the wall in an effort to create more space from your hallucination
>because there is no way that standing on four hooves in the middle of your room is,
"P-Pinkie Pie..."

>she jumps in excitement as you finish her sentence
>"Yay!! You know who I am!!"

>she's excited, but you're still freaking out
>you look to the half-eaten cupcake on the ground
"I KNEW that thing tasted funny!!"

bamp

oh god im crying.

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>>25856199

>you look at the Pinkie in front of you
>still in shock
"You're not real."

>still smiling, she responds
>"Of course I'm real!! Can something NOT real do this??"
>she proceeds to bunny hop all over your room, increasing in speed as she goes
>then she hops all over your walls, sideways,
>then she jumps from your floor, to the wall, to the ceiling, to the other wall, then back to the floor

>she repeats this several times, all while screaming out "WWWWOOOOOOOOOOOHOOOOOOO!!"

"Wait!"
>she stops in mid air, and looks at you in anticipation
"Can... can I.. pet you?"

>she drops onto her hooves
>"Sure!!"

>she slowly hops over to you and stands right in front of you
>your arm shakes as you slowly reach down towards the top of her head
>on all fours, she only stands a little higher than your knee
>your hand connects with her mane and the first thing you notice is how soft and bouncy it is

"Do... you know my name??"
>"Sure I do, Anon!"

>the second thing you notice is that your hand didn't in fact, go through her
>you were either tripping balls or this was actually happening

>you pet her body, and her coat is even softer than her mane
>she smells like... cotton candy
"Pinkie..."

>"Yeah, Anon?"

"Why are you here?"
>she sits on her haunches and takes a big breath of air

>"Well, I was babysitting the Cake twins when they started to get bored, and you know how crazy they get when they get bored and NO ONE wants them bored. So I looked around for some other toys for them to play with, except there were no toys around! So I went into hammerspace to go looking for some toys but when I was in there I saw you and I saw that it was your birthday but you were sad so I came down here to cheer you up!"

>she takes another deep breath and gets off of her haunches
>then she stands on her hind legs next to you and hugs your leg

>"And no one should be sad on their birthday!"

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>>25857139

>she backs up a few paces and then floats in the air, sitting in mid air in meditation-style positioning
>she gets into some kind of character as genie garb just appears

>"So Genie Pie grants you the answers to three questions."

>you shake your head
"Wait.. why only three?"

>she breaks character for a second
>"Oh, I have to get back to foal-sitting the Cake twins before Mrs. Cake sees that I'm gone."

>under the enormous stress of not only seeing this happen in front of you, but also not being prepared as to what to ask Pinkie if such an opportunity arises
"I don't even know what to ask! I never thought something like this would happen!"

>she tilts her head and looks to the side
>"Ummmm maybe something about Equestria?"
>you nod your head with great fervor
"Yeahyeah, that."

>she floats down to the ground and sits again
>you sit next to her as she tells you all about Equestria and what her life has been like
>you've heard most of it before, or rather, you've seen most of these things happen
>but hearing her describe it just gives so much more light and detail that you never would have never thought of

>when she's done, you tell her about your life
>the good times, and the not-so-good

>you share sadness together
>you share laughs together

>and by the end, the light of your future, for whatever reason, just seems a little brighter

>>25857433

>as the two of you talk, you pet her mane
>she wiggles next to you a little closer
>then in order, her tail wiggles, her eye twitches, her back right leg twitches, and a tingle goes up her spine

>with sad eyes she looks over
>"Oh no... Anon, I have to go.."
>you look at her with sadness and surprise
"What? You just got here less than a half hour ago!"

>"I know but tail, eye, back right leg, then a tingle up my back means that Pumpkin is crying!"

"Okay but wait, I thought of the question I really want to ask. You said that Equestria is great but even that place has its problems. Sometimes bad things happen, even over there.."

>she gets up and opens a portal, but she doesn't step in yet
>you get up as well
"Pinkie... how do you stay happy? Everything in my life is taking a nose dive and I'm just not happy any more. I just want to know how to be happy."

pic

>"Anon, sometimes even /my/ life isn't that fun. When I was on the rock farm, everything was boring and hard. When one of my friends is having a bad day. When Gummy doesn't want me to pet him.."

>she looks away for a moment
>"..but I learned something. What happens around you shouldn't control how you feel."

>she gallops a few feet toward you, then jumps onto your chest and hugs you
>"I /choose/ to be happy. And I want you to be happy too."

>you hug her back, trying to keep yourself together
"T-Thanks Pinkie,"

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>>25857616
pic didn't load

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>>25857616

>"Happy Birthday, Anon."
>she lets go of the hug and drops back down
>and as she steps towards the portal, she places a hoof in it and looks at you
"Will I see you again?"

>her sadness is wiped away
>"Oh, I always look out for my friends."

>friends
>Pinkie just called you her friend
>you are Pinkie's friend

"But.. how can you watch over me if you're not here?"
>she shrugs
>"Oh, I'm here and there.."

>she thinks for a minute before responding
>"Hey Anon, did you like that cupcake I gave you?"

>you look at her weirdly
"Uhh Pinkie, you didn't give me a cupcake..."

>she smiles mischievously at you, happy as can be
>"Yeah I did."

>she jumps into the portal
>but before it closes, you hear her voice wildly screaming off into the distance
>"DON'T FORGET ANON!!"

>you wait a second

>"KEEP SMILING!!!!"

>portal closes

>leaving you and the cupcake you got earlier in the room together

>>25849837
good job on being born

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>>25855111
It was no H/A by any means, but I hope you liked it anyway. Happy Birthday OP.

Now time for me to not post anything for another 2 weeks.

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>>25849885

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>>25850111

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>>25857712

>>25849891
That hit a little to close to home there anon...

>it's a pathetic normie having an existential crisis episode

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>>25854841
>Bitches ain't nothing but hoe's with tricks.
It's bitches ain't shit but hoes and tricks

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>>25858349

Lick on these nuts and suck the dick

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>>25858436
Get the fuck out after you're done

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>>25858763
Then I hops in my ride
to make a quick run