Flutterrape - 13/12/15

what is this

>>25746677
the yellow horse

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>>25746677
A yellow horse that can't seem to wait a couple weeks out of eagerness to give you your Chistmas (or whichever holiday you celebrate) present.
You just need your pants off.

So, the hungry games thing gave this general the most activity its had a short time for ages.

...Only for it to die shortly after.

Keep it undead Flutterrape.

>"Um, Anon? Could you tell me if this rag smells like chloroform?"
>It does
>You wake up several hours later with your pants gone and your midriff covered in her juices.
>Fucking Fluttershy.

>>25747046
Ha. Classic.

>>25747933
>"Oh, silly me! These aren't my glasses!"

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>>25746804
When did they make a christmas edition of this?

>>25748117
Last year... or year before, I can't remember.

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Yeeaaah, work that grill baby.

I'm trying to make something good for you guys to read so don't die this time

>>25749256
No, you! Faggot... Don't tell me not to die, I dowhat I want!

Apparently nobody is allowed to sleep or the thread will die.

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The joke is on Fluttershy, I'd be the one raping her!

>>25750885
>That look on her face

>"Are you here to rape me again Anon?"

>>25746662
FAGGOTSFAGGOTSFAGGOTSFAGGOTSFAGGOTSFAGGOTSFAGGOTSFAGGOTSFAGGOTSFAGGOTSFAGGOTSFAGGOTSFAGGOTSFAGGOTSFAGGOTSFAGGOTSFAGGOTSFAGGOTSFAGGOTSFAGGOTSFAGGOTSFAGGOTSFAGGOTSFAGGOTSFAGGOTSFAGGOTSFAGGOTSFAGGOTSFAGGOTSFAGGOTSFAGGOTSFAGGOTSFAGGOTSFAGGOTSFAGGOTSFAGGOTSFAGGOTSFAGGOTSFAGGOTSFAGGOTSFAGGOTSFAGGOTSFAGGOTSFAGGOTSFAGGOTSFAGGOTSFAGGOTSFAGGOTSFAGGOTSFAGGOTSFAGGOTSFAGGOTSFAGGOTSFAGGOTSFAGGOTSFAGGOTSFAGGOTSFAGGOTSFAGGOTSFAGGOTSFAGGOTSFAGGOTSFAGGOTSFAGGOTSFAGGOTSFAGGOTSFAGGOTSFAGGOTSFAGGOTSFAGGOTSFAGGOTSFAGGOTSFAGGOTSFAGGOTSFAGGOTSFAGGOTSFAGGOTSFAGGOTSFAGGOTSFAGGOTSFAGGOTSFAGGOTSFAGGOTSFAGGOTSFAGGOTSFAGGOTSFAGGOTSFAGGOTSFAGGOTSFAGGOTSFAGGOTSFAGGOTSFAGGOTSFAGGOTSFAGGOTSFAGGOTSFAGGOTSFAGGOTSFAGGOTSFAGGOTSFAGGOTSFAGGOTSFAGGOTS

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>>25748861
>Not the original Anon posting it.
>Not correct filename.
>Suppose to be three E's and one A in "Yeeeah."

Imposter.

Yeeeah, work that grill baby.

>>25753971

Your impotent rage amuses me. Please continue.

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>>25754479
Heh, I thought I was the only one.

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Inspired by >>25753971


“NO, you monumental FAGGOT!”
>Fluttershy cowers away to the edge of your bed, flinching.
>”Pl-please don’t hit me!”
“You come into my bedroom at the dead of night, shattering my bedroom mind you, slithered into my bed with your sin ridden body wearing a red nose and some reindeer antlers and you’re asking me NOT hit you?!”
>”Well, if that’s okay with-“
“WHAT KIND OF ASS BACKWARD DO YOU LIVE IN?!”
>You jump out of bed and pick Fluttershy up.
>”Oh my, you’re strong~”
>You walk to the broken window and throw her out, you heard a little more glass breaking.
>After Fluttershy hits the grass with a thud, she limps away.
>”Happy Holidays mister Anonymous.”
“FUCK YOU AND GET OFF MY PLANET BITCH!”
>Slide back into the bed.
>yfw she’s been breaking your bedroom window three nights in a row.

Fucking Fluttershy.

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>>25753971
Okay seriously you inspired me.

“WHAT THE FUCK KINDA SCHMUCK DO YOU TAKE ME FOR?! NO WAY IS THIS RIGHT! ADD THAT SHIT UP AGAIN!”
>The waitress blinks a few times and wipes away the spit subtly.
>”As you can see, sir, your champagne is what made this bill so high.”
“First off, it’s pronounced ‘Sham-pag-en’, asshole, second, you can forget about your tip.”
>You slam some bits on the table, get up and walk out, dragging the chair you sat in.
>The waitress follows you outside.
>”Uuuh, sir, that’s this establishes property, and you’re still a few bits short.”
“Alright, I got your bits, in glasses.”
>”I’m sorry?”
>You toss the chair into the restaurant’s front window.
>The couple that was eating at the table dodged the chair just in time.
>Sadly, their food has been sprinkled with bits of glasses.
“Keep the change, bitch.”
>Walk away like you own the fucking town.

1/2

>>25754833

>”Anonymous, at what part in that story did this waitress try to rape you?”
“Did I mention how much that bill cost, Twilight? That right there is wallet rape, and I won’t put up with that shit.”
>Twilight takes a breath, clearing her throat.
>”Anonymous, that doesn’t give you the right to go and vandalize property!”
“I’m sorry you feel that way, now as I was saying, she also had the nerve to grab my penis!”
>”No she didn’t, you didn’t even mention that in the story you just told me.”
“That’s part I was getting at! Now stop interrupting me, anyway, she was so overwhelmed from my macho man demeanor she followed me home, I tried to tell her to fuck off, but noooo. She wanted to ‘Fuck on’.”
>Twilight tosses her notes in the air.
>”’Fuck on’ isn’t even a phrase!”
“Get out more, maybe you’ll hear it you NEET shrink, when was the last time you got laid anyway? Spike doesn’t count.”
>Twilight glares at you, silent.
>She points to the door.
>”Get the fuck outta my castle.”
“Fine. By the way, you’re the worst alicorn. Think about it, Cadence is a complete shit and she still out ranks you. Get rid of those wings and go back to being an adorable unicorn, like the good ol’ days.”
>”Oh fuck you Anon.”
“No need to get all colon compromised. I’m only telling the truth. I’m out.”
>You walk out of the Twilight’s castle.
>Instantly you pinch you nose from a fowl scent that surrounds you.
>This can only mean one thing.
>”HEY ANON!”
“Ugh, hey Cadence.”
>”Did you mean that? Am I better than Twilight?”
“Don’t get your hopes up, you’re still a shit.”

Moral to the story is, Cadence a shit.

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>>25754591
>>25754845
I quite like these, more asshole Anon.

>>25754591
Garbage

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>>25754930
Thanks.

>>25754931
Yes, that's it. Engage with this thread.
Tell me about how shitty that first one was.
Which I'll admit it was shitty, but I had fun writing it. Still, it got you to reply.

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>>25754833
>>25754845

I am impressed. We need more of Anonymous where he is a total bastard

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>Cadence a shit.

The bait is set, all we need to do is wait...

>>25755051

ITT: We wait.

>>25755051
no she's not, chill out man

>>25757382

>>25754151
>Trying to usurp the position of Flutterrape dolphin poster
>Not even challenging to a duel for the title.

Imposter? You're not even good enough to be my fake.
Yeeaaah, work that grill baby.

>>25757935
You're the fake m8. Now quit baiting.

Check the archive, look up "Yeeeah, work the grill baby."
Check the filename. It'll have a series of numbers, not "image.jpg", you faker.

I am the original dolphin poster.
>That spoiler
>Still can't get the "Yeeeah" right.
Are you even trying to be my fake?

>>25758008
Fuckin' hell, I'll save you the time.

https://desustorage.org/mlp/search/text/Yeeeah%2C%20work%20that%20grill%20baby./

>>25757935
>>25758008

Ya know, if you post anonymously, then IP rights and origination claims are pretty much out the window.

tl;dr Who gives a shit? Post whatever.

>>25758058
I know, I'm just trying to start some shit. Personally, I'm flattered someone actually posted it while I was away.

>>25758075
Are you that bored Anon? Is it because no one is posting anything?
You're the fake btw. Stop b89ng m80

>>25758087
Yes, it's absolutely because no one is posting anything. I'm bored out of my mind.
I'll shoot ya with an M80 if you don't stop with all that imposterisms MATEY.

>>25758111
I was thinking of trying to post a rape story, I guess.
And I'll slam your tight butthole with my massive mandingo cock faker. Nice trips also

>>25758087
>>25758111
next faggot to post this shit gets raped

>>25758149
Post what exactly?

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>>25758149

Ybab llirg taht krow, haeeey.

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>>25758134
I say go for the rape story.
Ever take a massive shit and look into the toilet bowl and see an anaconda tier turd curled up and think, "huh, so that's how much dick I can take..."
Thank you. I don't get trips often.

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>>25758149
>Ybab llirg taht krow, haaaeey.

>>25758180
>>25758173
alright, prepare your anuses for the casual rape session
be a even bigger faggot & i'll get Nyx to rape you

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>>25758259
How big of a faggot?

>>25758259
>Le Nyx maymay
Not all of us get triggered by that qt anon...
дa paбoтaть , чтo -гpиль peбeнкa

>>25758299
fursuit levels & general faggotry
>>25758330
in english?
also i love triggering autism with Nyx

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>>25758468
>triggering autism
>not working the grill baby.

Get out.

>>25758500
you first, don't make me get the hot wax

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>Just make a friend she said.
>It all seemed so easy at first, what with Twilight and her friends being so welcoming towards you initially, and in truth, they taught you a lot.
>But when push came to shove?
>All you can do is sigh, as you sit outside the doorstop of Anonymous's house, a frisbee resting at your hooves.
>Who better than him to be your first REAL friend? Somepony who isn't affected by the Twilight, Celestia, Luna or Cadence's status, and won't feel intimidated to be your friend?
>He's perfect!
>Just one problem.
"Anon? Are you ready to talk to me?"
>"FUCK OFF!"
>You hear something bang against the door. Maybe a shoe.
>He doesn't like you much.
>Something about not going back in time, and preventing Fluttershy from doing something to him...you weren't really listening amidst all the yelling and screaming about Fluttershy.
>You've been trying everyday at noon, with various friend-oriented activities-
>Basketball, reading comic books, going out for smoothies, EVERYTHING.
>With a defeated frown, you stand up, grabbing your toy with magic, and trotting off to Sugarcube corner.
>Ice cream heals all wounds.
>Eventually.

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>>25758533
Alright, alright, sheesh, anything but the hot wax. Its a good idea to give dolphin a rest for today.
Including you, faker. No more for the rest of this thread, alright?

>>25758562
You have my attention.

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>Day yet another turgle in Equestria.
>Heavy breathing.
>That's what you're conscious most about this moment.
>{one's not quick enough.}
>Taking a gander at the table, you take note who you're sitting with.
>Smarty Pants in one chair, back hunched over.
>Angel sits in another, thumping his rabbit feet against the seat.
>The cold metal touching your temple reminds you of what you're trying to accomplish.
>Ending it all.
>Looking at Smarty Pants, your leer your eyes.
"It's a course of action I MUST take, so shut up!" You bark.
>Your trigger finger slowly pulls, helping you to the next life.
>Eyes shifting down to the table, locking onto the two other guns.
>You exhale.
"Here goes nothing."
>Pull the trigger.
>"Click," the gun says. Denying your access to the next life.
>You check the chambers and find that the gun was empty to begin with.
>You have tried all three guns, nothing.
>Out of anger, you slam your hands onto the table.
>The guns jump out of their places
>One hits the ground; a loud bang rings your ears as a stray bullet goes flying to a window.
>Out of nowhere, the second one fires, hitting Smarty Pants right in between his eyes.
>Stuffing threatens to leak from his forehead.
>Relief.
"It's... It's over."
>You stand up, turn around and walk out the door.
>Looking up at the night sky, the stars smirk upon you.
>Another loud bang.
>Sudden pain.
>Fall to your knees.
>Eyes drifting to your shirt, blood comes the center of your chest.
>It's cold.
>Winter has come upon you.
>Fall face first into the dirt.
>Smarty Pants walks up to the door frame, standing on his hind legs.
>A gun is his right hoof, the wound on his forehead regenerating.
>"It was a nice try, Anonymous."
>He laughs.
>"Three guns and one goes off."
>"One's empty, one's not quick enough."
>Angel joins him at the door, calm.
>"HA! Trying to outsmart Smarty Pants. The guy had a death wish."
>Everything went black.

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>>25758562
>You slowly push open the doors into the bakery, and take a seat in the corner.
"....Anon..I only want to be friends.."
>You inhale, and exhale loudly folding your head in your hooves on the table.
>Barely twenty seconds have passed when frantic hooves pummel your wither with gentle taps.
>You already know who it is.
>"Yooo-hoooo Equestria to Starlight Glimmer! Why are you sitting there being all mopey wopey?!"
>You look up from your spot of pity, and focus on the hyperactive pink pony, who's bouncing up and down in place.
"Pinkie..Can I have a-"
>In a primrose blur, she zips into the kitchen, and comes back with an ice cream sundae.
>"Ice cream sundae?! I got you covered Glimglam!"
"Glim--?"
>She starts bouncing again.
>"Your nickname silly! That's what friends do! We give each other nicknames!"
>You smile weakly, pulling the frozen treat closer to you.
"Thank you Pinkie-uh..Ponka Poo?"
>"Hehehehehehe! *snort* You might want to give it a little work there!"
>Pinkie falls on her back, rolling with laughter.
"I suppose I'm just not good at this whole "friend" thing yet."
>Your ears droop to the sides of your head.
>Pinkie takes a seat across from you, resting her head on her hooves.
>"What's wrong? You can tell Auntie Pinkie~"
>Auntie Pinkie? You're like two years older than her.
>in any case though, maybe talking about your problem will make things a little better.
>You scoop out a bit of the melting ice cream, and shovel it into your mouth.
"I'm trying to befriend Anon-"
>"Oo! Anonymous? On the edge of town?"
"Is there any other Anonymous?"
>"Good question!"
>Pinkie looks like she's thinking.
"U-uh..anyway...I'm trying to make friends with him, and he's not...he's not very accommodating."
>Pinkie snorts again.
>"Anon is being a grumpy pants? Don't worry! He'll come around! He was like that with all of us!"
"Really?"
>She nods.
>"Mhm! Him and Fluttershy were like that for the loooooooongest!"

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>>25758803
I don't... I'm lost here, what the hell is going on? You and your fucking turgles. What even is a turgle?
Explain this shit.

>>25758803
>>"Click," the gun says. Denying your access to the next life.

>Implying there is any such thing.

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>>25758855
"Him and Fluttershy? Is there something going on between them?"
>Pinkie gets uncomfortably close to your face.
>"There sure is! Fluttershy says she visits him every morning, and they hang out!"
>Is that why he wouldn't open his door? Fluttershy was in there?
"I-I had no idea...Anon never let on that they were-"
>The doors to sugarcube corner slowly open.
>The two of you look to the entrant, to see it's the timid yellow turncoat-UH-kindhearted Pegasus herself.
>"I-I heard my name being said...?"
>Pinkie pounces on her like a lion, pinning her to the ground.
>"I was telling Glimmer how you, and Anon are the bestest of buddies!"
>They touch noses, as you keep on with your prescribed placebo for depression.
>"O-oh...yes..! We're b-bosom chums..."
>She averts her eyes.
>You don't blame her. Pinkie's vocabulary doesn't have the word "personal space".
>Or was that words?
>Pinkie lifts the squeaking mare up, and places her in the seat in front of you.
>"Perfect! Maybe you can give GimGlam some pointers! I'll go make us smoothies! MMH!"
>Pinkie happily trots away, at a much more visible speed this time around, leaving you with Fluttershy in the empty salesroom.
>She fidgets in her seat.
"Uh...So.."
>"You were trying to make friends with Anon..?"
>You perk up.
>Finally! The ignition you needed to spark up a conversation.
"Yes! I've been trying like Twilight instructed, but he's not very friendly-"
>"Oh my. Wh-what have you tried?"
>You put the spoon to your chin recalling all the things you've tried.
"Let's see..Volleyball, scuba diving, hiking, watching movies, and frisbee-"
>Fluttershy puts a hoof up.
>"Those are all nice things to try, but to make friends with Anon, you have to do something...a bit "more"."
>Fluttershy's face takes a sudden change.
>Like a Tiger about to eat its prey.

>>25759354
Please tell me there will be more of this.

>>25759354
that picture reminds me of something...

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>>25759354
This can only end well

>>25761007
Agreed.

>>25755051
Yeah, I know.

Bump
I miss Minion of Lulu...

Yeeeah, page 8 work that grill baby.

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>>25763642

>>25762689
Ladies, please! The spirit is willing, but the flesh is tender and bruised!

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>>25764108
Where might a fine mare such as myself find tickets for this event?

>>25764138
They're supposed to have tickets? Shit...

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>>25763642

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So, I asked in the Writefags' Guild a while ago on what stories might be good to read over in order to try and do sexual/clop stuff better and they recommended you guys.

Any stories in that pastebin up there (or just in general) you folks think did the clop really, really well? Looking for suggestions here to try and writefag better.

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>>25764564
Off the top of my head, 3 writefags come to mind.

Minion of Lulu does clop really well. He's got a lot of content on his pastebin.
http://pastebin.com/u/minion_of_Lulu

Smudgey is just as excellent as well, check out his Element of Seduction series.
http://pastebin.com/u/Smudgey

Lastly, JChallo writes some decent clop too, his "Clop Werk Files" series is awesome.
http://pastebin.com/u/jchallo83

>>25764564
Jibber
Slasher
>Rape

>>25764618
It would help our visitor quite a bit if you linked him to the pastebins.

http://pastebin.com/u/Slasher_Science

http://pastebin.com/u/Jibber

>>25764633
Why would I spoonfeed it to him when there is a link at the top of the thread with all the FSR writers?
I simply assumed he was smart enough to find it.

>>25765362
Jump

>>25766245
do a flip, faggot

>>25764564
Does anyone know why the Writefag's Guild was dead over the last two days?

Because someone from over there lurks here apparently.

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>>25766800
Saw that? Radical, wasn't it?
Not so tough now, huh Mr. dubs?

>>25766814
My guess is the "Collective" are having a little break. No worries, the thread will be back.

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>>25759354
>Fluttershy's face takes a sudden change.
>>Like a Tiger about to eat its prey.
....RAPE

>>25768552
>that pic

I would not want to be raped by that.
But snugglin' would be coo'

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>>25767812

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>>25769446
I wrote some shit.

http://pastebin.com/CeR7bAu6

>>25769541
>I wrote some shit.
STILL writing about Cadance?

>>25769556
Funny you say that. I'm posting the finale to Something You'd Regret Tonight.

>>25769556
Is it just me or does this dank meme gets old rather fast?

>>25769630
Pretty much, I didn't feel all that tickled after I said it. Kinda over it.

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>>25769556

sly cheeky lil dickhead, man.
>>25769572
You're wonderful

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>>25768588
Well if not that what about this

>>25770590
best mlpytp

>>25769556
Aww, I got excited there for a second.

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>tfw your sexual repression hits critical mass and you just have to let one out.

>Be Anonymous
>You get up to do the most lovely part of your day, taking a poo.
>After your morning ablutions you go downstairs and make breakfast.
>You take a sit on your loveseat and relax into a book.
>The daily knocking of Fluttershy happens and you just call out telling her to come in.
>No sense and getting up, you're cozy now.
>Today, Fluttershy barges in the door like a spilled lumber, swiftly unsettling you as you were.
>Face down and silent after impact.
>Before you can question this, she leaps.
>Gathering yourself you jump up, only to have Fluttershy wrap herself around your ankles, for you to fall to your face the next moment.
>In this moment you think she might actually have you.
>Being as timid and reserved you were yourself. Never venturing out to meet new ponies like Twilight suggest. Keeping your whimsical little crushes and fantasies forever a secret from this world.
>When you come to, you find Fluttershy struggling with your pants.
>She managed to pull them down your legs from your feet, but somehow got herself entangled in them.
>Fluttershy fruitlessly struggling gives you all the opportunity you need to line her up with the door frame.
>You pick her up with your shovel and flop her out the door and too the trash can.
>Opening the lid you pick her up and toss her in.
>All of your crumbled love letters cushion her landing at the bottom of the bin.
>Seeing as there was no real harm done to her in this you take a moment to look around.
>You were also throwing out your devastated ol toilet bowl.
>Hefting it up and pitch in into the can right atop Fluttershy.
>She squeaks out in pain. There you go, all is right.
>You sigh and head back towards your house now.
>As you get to the door, something hits your nose.
>A fragrance from behind you, at approximate distance from from you as your trash can is.
>A smell that would only arouse you.
>You turn to see it.

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>>25773733
>Princess Mi Amore Cadenza, emerging from the can.
>She gives you a look, eyes half-lidded, swaying shoulders, she's waiting for you.
>Without further adieu you leap at your star struck love.
>You connect your lips to her's and wrap your tongues with a hopeless abandon.
>Pulling her close you feel her warmth, letting her lovely scent soak deep into your shirt.
>Erect and primed to go, you line yourself up and make the plunge.
>You pound right into Cadance's tight booty hole, eliciting a moan from her immediately.
>She loves butt stuff, and you love to stuff butt.
>You don't last long, having kept these feelings repressed for so long you are already about to burst.
>Cadance squeals out loud as you unleash the largest load her posterior has ever had pleasure of filling it.
>You pull out and stand there, on your front lawn, before the world in all your new found sense of glory.
>The only thoughts running through you mind now are
>Cadance is the shit

>>25769556
Listen here you lil' Cadance...

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>>25771494
mmm, yis.
>>25774312
pfff

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>>25773750
Ya got me.

>>25775461

>Every morning you wake up to something like this.
>She sings in the shower, and mostly about something that implies sex.
>Can't even get your triple S done without issues.
>"Getting horny now~!"
>Cringe, and roll to the side on the couch.
>Shoving the pillows over your ears to muffle the sounds, the water stops.
>Might as well get up now.
>As you walk towards the restroom, she opens the door.
>"Oh, hey Anon~, sneaking a peek?"
>What?
"What?"
>"Well maybe if you ask, or if not, I'll give you a taste of the show~?"
>With that, she turns around, leans her front down, and pulls the towel away from her nether region.
"I just want to take a shit..."
>She turns around, and brushes uncomfortably close to you.
>"That's so...hot."
>With the last word, she promptly bumps your side with her hips.
>Living with ponies sucks sometimes.

>>25775515
I kek'd

bumos

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Rainbow seems like the type to become bashful of her girlishness when she has a crush on Anon, because she's usually all tough and stuff.
I've seen this idea used so many times, and it's not a bad one, but I'm wondering if there's a better way to make her...

>>25776385

Show canon - she finds girly stuff tedious (like serving as Rarity's model) or uncomfortable (doesn't like ponies touching her hooves).

Here, it's that "Rainbro" paradigm that was set very early on, making her almost a tsundere archetype.

Fuck.

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>>25777770
What I would give to have such a gift at my doorstep

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I DUNNO IF 4PP138100M (APPLEBLOOM IF YOU'RE FUCKING DYSLEXIC) EVEN HANGS OUT HERE ANYMORE BUT LET ME JUST SAY I AM STILL REALLY FUCKING ANGRY THAT HE KILLED JEREMY. FUCK YOU 4PP138100M YOU FUCKING CUNT, I HOPE YOUR SOCKS ARE ALWAYS IN A PERPETUAL STATE OF SEMI-DAMPNESS.

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>>25778863
write him back to life then

ded thred.
ded generl.

>>25779555
ded bord
ded fandum
ded ner cultur
ded economeh
ded worl
ded univrs
ded multivrs
ded exsistns
Anon, pls.

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>>25778863

you just got saved

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I'm fuckin stuck with this part in my meh story.
Anon and Rainbow need to hang out for a bit
Need an idea for what they can do that doesn't involve any main areas like SugarCube Corner or Sweet Apple Acres. So like, an activity they can both do for a while.

>>25782643
Going to the bar or have anon watch her amazing moves whilst 'mirin.
Nobody else has ever done that.
promise :)

>>25782643

They could spend time being lazy at a pond. Talking about why being lazy FEEEEEEEEELS GOOOOD YEEEEAH
IT FEEELS GOOOOD YEEEAH

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>>25782669
>>25783018
I can combine these ideas minus the bar
danks a bunch

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>>25783366
Any time bby.

>>25746804
Need sauce for original gif
please

bumipo

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>>25783522

Rarity is a terrible rapist.

>All she does is fuss with the rope she used to tie Anon up.
>Replaces it several times.
>Dyes it a different colour to better match his hair.
>Gives him a quick make-over so that he looks perfect.
>Spends the next 3 hours doing herself up.
>He's asleep by the time the actual raping starts, but by that point Rarity doesn't want to touch him because "ew morning breath"

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>>25784879
You clearly overthink how much effort she puts into it.
All she needs is a simple demand. Failure to obey will be magically forced.

pmub

>>25768588
faggot
>>25773750
>pic
>file name
you just love workin my grill baby?
my fins are in oebit

>>25785189
You think her idea after telling you to bend over is mounting up and pegging, or sticking her horn up your butt and magically cumming from that?

>>25786481
unf

>>25786481
has anyone ever written something about anon fucking the horn
like actually shoving his dick inside of the horn

>>25786907

How the zarking fardwarks would you inside a horn? needledick

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>>25786907

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>>25786907

>>25787020
"N-No, killing her for being a bully is right!"

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>>25787020
Okay, that's not even Flutterrape.

I found this relevant picture within one minute.

See? No effort.

>>25787758
well neither was what i linked that to

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hump

>>25786174
Save the dolphin meme for the next thread friend.

>>25788457
Only 347 posts to go!

>>25788465
Its quite exciting to see another dolphin poster. In the meantime, let's chill.

>>25788201
well, I almost made it through half the day without wanting to kill myself.

>>25788557
We got you, Anon.

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Daily reminder

>>25789380
I... can't refute that.

bumps

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>>25786481
I always kinda liked the concept of horngasms, so... I like that thought.

So, what happened to this Glimmer story

>>25795101
65420 dicks

>>25760876
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=DvhKRN-WrYQ
Maybe it's time for her to try baseball...

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I don't know why I thought of this, or why I'm amused by it, but... Nudge.


As it turns out, Anon is a chubby chaser. This being revealed by the amount of time he started spending with Twilight, which is a lot more than usual lately, and his pointing out that she'd gotten a little bit chubby. Whether she actually has or not has and still is going unnoticed by her friends, and she's even starting to take a bit of offense to the notion (But lets be fair, it's been noted that her plot has gotten a bit bigger since becoming an Alicorn). Either way, Anon see's something relating to it on her, and he can't help but enjoy the look of it. He's even kinda wanting to ask her out. Despite those annoying claims, Twilight is somewhat considering it because he's not all that bad a guy.

This revelation has however given *insert pony here (probably fluttershy like usual)* the thought that if they put on a bit of weight, maybe he'd get all up in her. So without thinking it through too much, they go ahead and do that. Obviously it backfires in several senses, most notably being that he probably finds them annoying, or because they don't differentiate 'Chubby' and 'Fat' and end up going overboard. She'll even offer that he get them at the weight he wants with foodplay if he's into that!
Naturally the stress of the situation is probably going to upset them, to which they'll turn to food to make it worse. Technically Anon screwed them on this, so the only solution here is to work the weight off... with his help. They'll have to throw their weight around and use him to get a decent workout through sex to lose that weight. It's his fault, so they'll use him to fix it!

Meanwhile, Twilight just keeps looking in mirrors and questioning herself on what kind of relationship she'd even have with Anon if he really likes her 'chub'.

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>>25796013
Though if it's an obsession with weight and needing to work it off, I guess Rainbow would probably be a bit more fitting for the antagonist situation.
Because dat belly.

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>>25796052
Also just to pointlessly add to that.

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>>25796080
I prefer my bookworms /lit/ and my tomboys /fit/.

Sorry anon.

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>>25797341

boap

write

>>25800343
fuck, okay

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Elegant Bump

Bamp

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>>25783522
This was the original gif.

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>>25802714
I recognize that HMV!

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>>25778941
>Dark clouds swirl above the peak of Mt. Cijuph
>Dark below, a pit of boiling lava toils and swirls around a spire of hardened black rock
>On top of that dark spire lays a highly advanced alchemical laboratory, potions and beakers bubbling, fumes sweeping upwards
>The wizard works tirelessly, carefully boiling and diffusing potions, their colors changing regularly
>Black robes fluttering, gnarled hands reach into a pouch and extract some root or dust, and sprinkle it into a flask seemingly at random
>Violent smoke and flame bursts out of it, before the color changes from a deep red to a sickly green
>The wizard cackles, and hoists the flask upwards
>"With this, I shall rule the world!"
>Meanwhile, approximately 2,342 kilometers away, Pickle was putting the finishing touches on repairing his best friend, Jeremy
>Jeremy had been smashed on the ground by an evil two timing cunt faced shit stained piece of filth not worthy to even like my fucking smegma
>Using several tubes of Super Gloo™ he had painstakingly pieced together each part of Jeremy, from the rim of the jar to the torn label, lovingly inscribed in sharpie "Jeremy."
>It had taken months, years even, to track down each individual piece to put together. Glass managed to get spread all the way to the next block
>But now, he had done it. The jar was complete, albeit crisscrossed with jagged lines of white glue holding him together
>Gently placing the wooden lid upon your dear friend, a warm green light began to emanate from him
>The inside began to slowly fill with brine, and a solitary, sliced dill pickle sat in the middle once it was full.
>Gently, Pickle removed the lid
>"Hey man...you okay?"
"WHERE THE FUCK HAVE YOU BEEN, SHITLORD? IT'S BEEN FUCKING AGES!"
>"Yeah man, I know, but now that you're here, maybe shit can get done?"
"Not fucking likely, asshole."
>"Oh."
>Pickle scratches his head and runs a hand through his randomly grown mullet
>"So...has anything changed?"
"No. Not really."
>"Cool."

>>25802993
yes
YES YES HES BACK

Is the sick twist that Super Gloo is made of fluttershy and thus your best friend is now Yellow Horse?

>>25803131
Don't you do this
Don't you pull her into this
Don't put the Devil in him

>>25803264
I didnt.
You did.
What did you thought when twilight knocked on your door, trying to test her new wonder glue?
When she told you its out of friendship and magic.
When she told you a friend helped her making it.

Go to your pickle lair, see what happens

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>>25802993
>Dark buttholes swarm above your face as you wake up in the morning.
>Down below, a phallus swells and hardens in the cramped area of shorts.
>On top of those shorts lays a tiny purple horse accompanied by her flying friends circling above you.
>The purple horse stares longingly, lusting for the chance to take in your meat mountain.
>Magical horn glowing, pink magic crawls up your body leaving a tingling sensation, just before stopping at your wrists and ankles.
>Powerful force and desire force your limbs down to the bed, rendering you unable to move.
>The great purple one giggles, and lowers her eyelids seductively.
>"With this, I shall claim you as mine."
>Meanwhile, approximately 2,342 kilometers away, Fluttershy was putting the finishing touches on her loved one's broken leg, Anon.
>Anon had fallen and life alert isn't in this world so he couldn't call someone to help him get up.
>Using several tubes of Flutter-shlick™ she had pleasurably applied it thoroughly to her sexual region, from the plump butthole at the top to the winking clit at the bottom which she likes to call "Sharen".
>It had taken like two days, one and a half even, to track down that specific brand of lube for this act as Anon lay unconscious in her house. Lube even managed to get spread all down her leg.
>But now, she had done it. The preparations were complete, albeit it would have been better if he were awake.
>Gently placing her body down on the naked, aroused, and unconscious Anonymous, an amazing feeling spread through her nethers.
>Her inside began to feel as if they were swirling as she continued to press her plump booty down on his legs repeatedly.
>Slowly, Anon opened his eyes.
>"A-Anon..."
"WHAT ARE YOU DOING, FLUTTERSHY? GET OFF MY DICK!"
>"Why don't you try to stop me? Oh right, you can't."
"What the fuck do you mean?"
>"Drugged you."
>Fluttershy slams down and grinds her pelvic region against his as he looks away in anger.
>"So... Want to talk?"
"No. Fuck you."
>"Kay."

This is a test
hope that works so i can use it somewhere

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>>25803537
didn't work.
oh well.

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>>25803315
I don't know what you mean.
-
"Well, buddy, feel like revin' up the ol' livin' space? I've been living on the street since I lost ya."
>"Well...I suppose so."
>Without hesitation, I hop into the jar. The familiar pull and constriction starting at my feet and rapidly moving upwards is comforting.
>With a flash of green light I’m in my home again.
>The green shag carpet floors soft, the lava lamps bubbling, the fireplace already on.
>Everything was right in the world
“Well, Jeremy, we’re back together again! Just like old times, eh?”
>Silence greets me.
“Jeremy?”
>Silence.
“Listen man, I’m happy to be back, but you mind putting on the game or something? You could port on down here, sit with me. It’ll be great!”
>The intercom crackles, then a voice, so soft it’s barely inaudible, says “How about s-something else.”
“Excuse me?”
>More Silence.
“Look, Jeremy, if there’s something wrong in the control room I’ll just port out and fix it.”
>Nothing.
>I walk over to the lever labeled “Exit” and pull down.
>A loud clunk reverberates through the room, but nothing happens.
>I lift and pull again.
>The lid doesn’t open.
“Jeremy, open the door.”
>It’s completely quiet.
“Jeremy! Open up!”
>”I-I’m afraid I can’t do that, Pickle.”
>Oh god.
>Oh god it’s her.
“Man, this shit is fucked up, don’t fuck with me on this.”
>”I’m sorry, Pickle, but Jeremy isn’t here anymore.”
>I frantically pull the lever, but nothing happens. If anything, it seems to make the lid shut tighter.
>I begin pacing frantically.
“O-okay, now listen, Fluttershy, let’s talk this out.”
>”And what do we have to talk about? Maybe the list of fetishes you’re willing to try?”
“No, I was thinking what it would take to get out of here.”
>”Oh…I’m sorry, but I can’t allow that.”
“And why the hell not!?”

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>>25803674
>”Because it’s high time you let me have my fun, of course! As we speak the real Fluttershy is coming to pick up your silly jar and take it home. Then, we’ll have all the time in the world.
>Shit
>Shit shit shit shit shit
>I’m fucked.
>There was no way to bargain with her, and the exit was shut tight. The only other way out was…
“Well then, it seems you’ve left me no choice but to break the walls down and find my own way out.”
>A soft chuckle emanates out
>”Y-you’ll find that very difficult to do without your Pickle of Navigation.”
>My stomach falls.
>Frantically I search my pockets, turning them out onto a table.
>Lucky Pickle, Pickle Lip Balm, Dildo Pickle…
>She was right.
>The pickle I used as an interdimensional compass was missing.
>Turning, I face the walls.
>Green mist swirls thickly, faint cracks of light passing through every now and again.
>Wandering out there was dangerous, suicidal without a guide.
>And without any means of navigation…
>No.
>I’m a survivor, damnit! I made it through the Best Human Contest!
>I will not be a prisoner in my own home.
>Reaching down, I pick up a chair.
>”W-what are you doing?”
>I slowly drag it to the wall.
>”Y-you can’t go out there! You m-might never come back!”
“If that’s what it takes to live…so be it.”
>I heft the chair, and smash it on the glass wall.
>Cracks form.
>I smash it again.
>The glass creaks and groans.
>I pull back and smash it one more time.
>The wall shatters, the green fog rushing in, blinding me.
>As it blows past me, damp warm air flows through my hair.
>Standing, I see a wasteland before me, green and barren
>The intercom buzzes and crackles
>”D-don’t-zzzzzzzzzz-g-g-g-goooo-zzzzzzz”
>I step out onto the dry and cracked pavement and begin to walk
>I’ll find my way out somehow
>And get my revenge
Sick Guitar Riff

>>25803709
Ha, good stuff.
And now starts your 200 part reviving the wasteland and getting revenge story.
Or just go down the magic bootyhole to get back.

Glad to see you writing again.

>>25802788
Than share your guilty
Share your faggotness
Share the link

>Fluttershy bumps you while she sneaks into you house in the middle of the night

Goat Mom is for sexual
fnord

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>>25805050

>>25796013

Twilight is kind of chubby.

Fuckin Nerd. She needs to get out of the Library more.

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>>25805050
No.

No she isn't.

Fuck you.

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A Bond in Violet Part 4 (even though it's technically me just getting a feel for the story and I kinda just want to see if anyone actually wants me to continue because holy shit I haven't written anything in god knows how long)

>BEEP.
>BEEP.
>BEEP.
>What the hell is that beeping noise?
>BEEP.
>You’re not a robot, last you checked.
>Was it an alarm?
>BEEP.
>No, your alarm is one of those stupid old fashioned bell-driven things.
>That’s all they had at the store, really.
>One of these days you’d invent the digital clock and become a zillionaire.
>Was zillion even an amount of numbers? If it wasn’t, you’d make damn sure that it was.
>All part of your plan.
>BEEP.
>Okay, no, the beeping has to stop.
>You reach around and try to find the source of the annoying noise.
>It is a mostly fruitless endeavor.
>BEEP.
>Not because you can’t find the noise or anything simple like that.
>But because your arms aren’t quite working.
>In fact, as your brain starts to wake up bit-by-bit, you notice that your eyes aren’t working either.
>And you are also not breathing.
>This is the most bizarre experience that you’ve had since…
>Hold on.
>Hold the fucking phone wait a second.
>You’re not dead are you?
>No way, that’d be bullshit. After coming all this way you’d fucking die?
>BEEP.
>What sort of cosmic force would will that?
1/?

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>>25805691
>You were going to be her hero, goddamnit.
>Not that stupid blue horse.
>A slight tingling sensation awakens around where you’re assuming your head is.
>Something is definitely not fucking right currently, but you’ll be damned if it’s going to kick your ass.
>You’re probably just asleep. And maybe you’re listening to someone else’s beeping.
>BEEP.
>“Okay, enough with the fucking beeping!” You mentally shout to nothing in particular.
>You guess you’re sort of stuck in your own head now.
>Hm.
>What’s the last thing you remember?
>Passing out in a pool of your own blood, after a pony-turned-vampire gouged out your throat.
>Hey now, not before you were able to deliver her to wherever she was going.
>Was it the castle? Something like that. With Luna, you surmise. That’s a familiar name. Yeah.
>BEEP.
>Well, this is getting you nowhere really.
>Maybe you were dreaming? But this is a bizarre dream. It’s all black. And the only noise you hear is that horrid-
>BEEP.
>Hold on a second.
>Passing out after severe blood loss…severe insomnia…
>Were you in a fucking coma?
>That…kind of explains something, you suppose.
>You read an article way back that coma patients retained a bit of brain function while they were out.
>BEEP.
>And apparently that’s enough function to make an annoying beeping noise.
>Wonderful. Thanks brain, you really pulled out the stocks for me. Us. Whatever.
>Well then…what now? This is completely unfamiliar territory.
>Can you will yourself awake? Is that how this works? You’re not entirely sure.
>For all you know, you could be actually dead.
>If not for the-
>BEEP.
2/?

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>>25805691
OH SHIT

ITS HAPPENING!

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>>25805699
>Unless heaven beeps. Which is a perfectly reasonable guess. You’re not going to judge heaven if it liked annoying noises.
>Hardly makes it a heaven you’d want to visit though.
>”L…br….wa…”
>Wait that’s not a beep.
>That’s another noise entirely.
>The tingling starts to get slightly stronger.
>You know what? Fuck it. Let’s try the whole ‘will yourself alive’ thing.
>Seemed to work in anime.
>Why not magical horseland?
>LIVE DAMNIT.
>LIVE!
>You open your eyes, albeit barely.
“Wow that actually fucking worked?”
>Though your eyelids seem awfully heavy, you’re able to get a little light into them.
>It’s enough, though.
>You’re fucking alive.
>Hot damn.
>After a struggling blink, you’re able to open your eyes. Slowly.
>Hold on. This place is a familiar to you.
>Stark white walls.
>BEEP.
>Annoying beeping noise.
>…strange medicinal smell.
>You’re at Ponyville General.
>Or, at least some kind of hospital.
>You give a quick scan around the room.
>BEEP.
>Sure enough, the beeping is coming from a device right next to you, hooked into your arm.
>So that’s your heart monitor you’re guessing.
>Apparently human anatomy isn’t so bizarre to ponies after all.
>Well, you say that, but what if they took a kidney out because they thought you had too many?
>…
>Moving on.
3/?

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>>25805705
>On your bedside table are some flowers and a few cards.
>You can already tell they’re written in Ponyspeak.
>But hey, someone cares, apparently.
>Judging by the glaring pink-ness of one of the cards, you’d have to guess it’s from Pinkie.
>There’s actually only two others, but they don’t have any real notifying features.
>The flowers are pretty though.
>Dark blue and sort of lilac looking. You guess. You’re not a damn florist. Nor are you even sure lilacs exist in this place.
>They’re a little wispy, though.
>You don’t feel a breeze, but still they sway ever so slightly.
>Neat.
>Nothing else really warrants any attention in the room.
>Alright, next, let’s do a body check.
>You attempt to raise your arm, but find your strength rather failing.
>That’s probably normal for a coma patient, you guess.
>Wiggling your head slightly from side to side give you a good judge of how sore you are all over.
>You’re also wrapped pretty tightly in the blankets.
>Probably to stop you from moving, if you had to guess.
>Do coma patients move a lot? Maybe they were just worried about you.
>”Ah. You are awake finally,” A voice speaks in your head.
>Wait, in your head?
>”Do you like the flowers? I created them in my own image. A bit narcissistic, perhaps,” the voice giggles. “It is good to see that you survived the ordeal.”
>Luna.
>That explains the weird flowers.
4/?

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>>25805716
How does this work exactly, do you just think in your head?
>”Essentially, though you’re only able to do so due to my own magic. I will say, that even my magic seems to be struggling with your human mind. The doctors seemed to be telling the truth.”
Well, you were human, after all. Magic isn’t exactly a native element back home. Wait, what about the doctors? What’s wrong with me?
>”Well, a passing trader found your body near a road from Canterlot. He called for help, fearing you dead. They brought you here, and attempted to heal you. I have not been able to visit you since, so I cannot say for what ails you.”
Alright. Fair enough. I’m mostly intact, I think. I feel really light headed though. And weak. I can barely move my arms.
>”As I said, the doctors used magic to heal you. Actually, give me a moment, I will summon one. We shall speak soon. There is much to discuss.”
No, wait what about Rarity?
>You wait for a few moments, but there is no response.
>There is, however, a knock on the door.
>A light blue furred pony trots in, wearing a white coat. You’d be dumb not to assume he was a doctor.
>”Ah! You’re finally awake. Gosh, had I known humans slept for that long, I would have given you more pillows to sleep on.” He chuckles at his own bad joke, stepping in and taking a look at your chart at the foot of your bed.
>If you could grimace harder than a slight frown, you would.
5/?

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>>25805723
>”Mr…Noneemus? How do you say that anyway? Haha, well, you should thank Celestia you’re alive. What in the world happened to you? Timberwolf attack in the middle of the field?”
>The asshole doctor is smiling at you, expecting a laugh probably.
>”Well, in any case, I’ll send in the recovery team shortly. It might take a little bit since you’re all human and stuff. But we’ll get you fixed up. Eventually! Hahaha.”
>He juts his head towards you as if you’re supposed to laugh at his joke, beaming a wide, annoying smile.
>Even if they did save your life or whatever, the urge to strike this guy is rising.
>”Oh and don’t try to move or anything. We gotcha locked in tighter than a cell at NCP. Oh, I suppose that’s a tasteless joke, isn’t it?” His smile fades in a flash and he almost seems glowering at you now.
>You have enough energy to cock an eyebrow at the doctor before he shrugs and quickly exits, locking the door behind him.
>NCP? He mentioned a cell, so you’re guessing that’s a prison or something.
>Why is that a tasteless joke? And why did he lock the door on you?
>You attempt another wiggle of your arms, and he’s right.
>Sure you’re covered in a blanket, but there’s nothing else holding you down that you can feel.
>Some unseen weight is upon you, stopping you from doing anything but moving your head.
>And speaking, as well, apparently.
>You’ve been meaning to say things, but they’re not really coming out. Your mouth just refuses to cooperate.
>This is a very bizarre situation.
>Luna didn’t seem all that concerned.
>But then again, the one time you met her was in the bottom of a well talking about pony vampires and other crazy crap.
>Maybe this sort of thing is normal for her.
6/?

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>>25805723
>A few minutes pass, mostly of you staring at the ceiling and trying not to think too hard.
>There was a voice practically screaming in the back of your head, and you knew exactly what it was saying.
>You’re choosing to ignore it currently, until you get some more information.
>The door unlocks and two nurse ponies enter, both unicorns.
>They walk to either side of your bed, and seemingly refuse to lock eyes with you.
>The one on the right of you even closes her eyes.
>…
>Their horns light up with that funny looking sparkle. One pink, one a sort of greenish yellow.
>Looking down, you see the target of their spell.
>’No, it isn’t your willy this time’, a part of you thinks.
>Their magic is enveloping your body, and the tingling that was in your head earlier returns.
>In fact, it spreads throughout your entire body, as if every muscle had fallen asleep and was in the throes of waking up.
>Thankfully, the telltale pain of parts falling asleep isn’t present.
>But this raises a few questions.
>Maybe they forced you into a coma? Or something crazy.
>Nah, you remember losing a lot of blood.
>And besides, you just saved one of their Element doodads from certain death. Or undeath. Or something like that.
>The ponies of Ponyville don’t –hate- you, either. Well, not that much.
>Outright ostracizing you isn’t exactly hate.
>The tingling continues, and you wager they’re restoring function to the rest of your body.
>…judging by the strain they seem to be showing, it’s only sort of working.
7/?

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>>25805732
>…judging by the strain they seem to be showing, it’s only sort of working.
>You attempt to wiggle your right toe.
>It obliges.
>So does your foot, and then your calf. Your fingers sort of work, but they feel all crackly. You really feel the need to pop your knuckles.
>A few more moments follow, and you think you hear one of the nurses swear under her breath.
>To be fair, they’re working up a hell of a sweat trying to heal you. Or whatever it is they’re doing.
>You’d likely be cursing too.
>Actually, let’s try that talking thing.
“Um.”
>That’s about all you’re able to manage.
>Your mouth is hella dry and cottony.
>That’s probably normal, too.
>The shock on the right pony’s face is probably not.
>Almost like she’s…scared of you?
“Don’t you dare speak to us! We’re only doing this because it’s our job.” The other nurse shouts at you, her visage a blight of anger on her face. She finishes the statement with a ‘tch’.
>You decide not to push your luck, since they were actually helping.
>This is going in the ‘what the hell is going on’ pile, though.
>A few more silent moments pass as they continue healing you
>Though with the weird weight on your body you don’t really know much difference.
>You can wiggle slightly, and seem to function normally.
>Nothing is broken, as far as you can tell.
8/?

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>>25805746
>There’s a dull pain on your neck, almost like a mosquito bite.
>…your neck…
>Oh shit.
>Instinctively you go to try and feel for it, but fail.
>The angry nurse seems to notice.
>”Don’t touch it. Our magic is the only thing keeping you from bleeding out, you cretin. You ought to feel honored,” she sneers.
>Cretin.
>That’s a fancy word for a lowlife.
>So you’re held against your will, a lowlife, and people are only taking care of you because they have to.
>And the doctor said something about a prison?
>Something isn’t adding up here at all, because it sounds a lot like you’re being accused of something or other.
>Why didn’t Luna say something about this?
>The nurseponies soon finish up and slam the door shut. The shy one does glance back at you, but you can almost see tears in her eyes before she departs.
>What, do they think you killed Rarity or something horrible?
>That’s preposterous. These guys are smarter than that, right?
>…right?
9/9

And this is where I'm stopping right now, mostly because I'm a dumb buttface and I love cliffhangers, but mostly to get some kind of notion on if I should even continue at all. My writing probably sucks nowadays. But I figured I'd practice and try to continue the plot slightly. Let me know what you think yall.

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>>25805754
Oh I almost forgot this thing.

http://pastebin.com/abMdgECm

>>25805772
>Finally writes a story after 2 years
>9 posts long

Glad to have you back please don't leave again

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>>25805792
As sure as Clever Dick is dead and in the grave, I'm still gone. Will I be back randomly? I dunno.

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>>25805754
>You are Anonymous the literary critic of the Ponyville Gazette.
>Currently sitting in the park sipping coffee to help you gather your thoughts.
>You've been tasked with reviewing the latest chapter of Rarity's new story.
>Technically she goes by a pen name, but Posh Circumstance is not very subtle at all; it's like if you called yourself Alien Ape.
>Anyway, you can't get enough of this story.
>Something about the way it portrays life and death intrigues you, and the plot is moving along at a very entertaining pace that doesn't inhibit the story.
>The perfect amount of greentext whimsy combined with narrative for your tastes.
>It does the great service of feeling alive as a story... hey you should use that!
>You write a small side note about it just as a familiar zoo smell becomes apparent.
>Fluttershy nuzzles your thigh and you flick her nose to get her to stop.
What?
>She smiles at you, showing a set of plastic vampire teeth in her mouth.
>"I can be a vampire too."
>You tell her to go away, and poke her in the eye with your pen until she backs up.
>"Are you sure? These glow in the dark."
As if that somehow makes it better. I'm trying to work right now.
>"Oh, sorry."
>Whatever. She totally fucking knew you were busy.
>You go back to writing, but her presence lingers over your shoulder.
>Mostly because she hasn't left yet.
>"I'll stop by your house later tonight so you can see it for yourself."
No, that's okay.
>She still doesn't leave.
>"It won't take too long."
Fine. Just... I need to work.
>She apologizes.
>Doesn't leave though.
>Can't focus on your writing now.
>With your eyes glued to your paper and her eyes glued to your back you reach a stalemate.
>You're going to have to write another very livid anonymous editorial later about how there are no restraining orders in Equestria.

let me tell ya, waking up at midnight and seeing this update... well pic related

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This thread looks like something out of 2013 and I'm so happy about it.

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>>25803813
Don't go all gay on me
This was a one time thing
Almost forgot
no homo

Bumps

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Jesus this thread really is dead. And here I was thinking I could help.

>>25809044
you made me happy by posting and being here
so I'm tryin
but
can't rush it
ya know?

>>25809044
I've always wondered, how big is your Rarara folder?

>>25809044

Dubs confirm...

>tfw there are three IWTCIRD threads on the board now that are more active than this.

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dear god i cant write small things anymore
they all gotta have a beginning, plot points that lead to awkward/funny encounters but also reveal a little about the twist at the end...

>>25809557
I know this feel.

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>>25809078
Ye ok. I've been out of the game for a while so. I was kinda expecting too much probably. >>25809100
I won't divulge. But I stopped collecting a while ago when S4 hit, essentially.
>>25809340
I get that /mlp/ is a haven of degeneracy, but isn't that normal?

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>>25809619
is that fabric up her ass?

If unicorns have levitation magic, couldn't they just lift themselves to fly, making them the best?

>>25809710
Nah. They're too heavy, not enough lift. They're like bees that obey the laws of gravity.

>>25809710
Glimglam does it,
I know that and I haven't even watched S5 yet.

>>25809725
But Twilight lifts the others sometimes, and things that are fucking huge

>>25809772
You raise a fair point, but you forgot one crucial fact.
I'm not a fucking huge austist who watches a little girls show, I just write shit about it

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>>25809809
Ah, yes. You are correct in that matter. However...
I stopped after season 3 so idk what even happened after that or if unicorns lifting themselves ever became a thing

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>>25809863
Only best pony has done it at the capacity you guys are thinking about

>>25809809
>Fan of the fandom

>>25809863
Whole season 5 finale shows Starlight Glimmer flying around Cloudsdale with magic.
Twilight was pretty much saying she must have become powerful since they last met, but I really just say here thinking "Holy shit, other unicorns! Get your shit together!"

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Has there ever been a cross between Fluttershy and Rarity called Carity who loves being a generous and kind pony and specializes in stitching animals together?

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>>25810672
I'm not sure what's more disturbing.
That gif, or that spoiler.

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>>25810672
>Carity stitches a kitten to Anon's dick, so it's always getting some "pussy"
>she then uses the python she stitched to a badger and rams it in his ass
Things get strange in here sometimes.

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>>25810783
Agreed...

>>25810783
I'd probably be a little more surprised by this if I hadn't had some weird thoughts along those lines previously...

>Anon accidentally burnt down Rarity's boutique somehow and she's living with him while it gets rebuilt. Rarity gets horny for Anon, attempts to use magic to seduce the fuck out of him, blasting his dick with magic that's supposed to give him immense pleasure.
>Unfortunately, she got the spell from Twilight, notorious for fucking up magic, and it turns his dick into a Rainbow Trout he must feed and maintain. Of course, Rarity brought her feisty cat with her in this living situation as well.

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>>25810988
>Rarity
>Horny
heh
cause
cause get it
get it cause
cause like
look

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>>25811016
I get it! Because she has a dick!
HAHAHAHAHAHAHA!

Ponies use "heck" right?
pretty sure they dont use hell

>>25811479
Yes, I swear I've heard Twilight and Pinkie use it multiple times.

They know not of Hell, aside from Anon using said place for the damned

>>25811506
Alright good. Almost made Rainbow say hell and I thought it looked strange.

>>25811479
I don't know about heck, I really only remember them saying 'hay'.
Though maybe in EQG they do, I don't remember.

Question:
Would you guys get mad if someone who has things they should finish just makes other content? Or is it so dead that the fact they're releasing anything is okay?

>>25812126
Unfathomable rage would be unleashed.
Best to stay dead.
^:)

>>25812126
I wouldn't be mad.

Just don't piss >>25812364 off. He means business. So make sure you're complying with his every demand EXACTLY to the letter.

But I wouldn't be mad.

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>>25812126
Why would anyone do such a thing

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>>25812999
<3
nice trips

>>25812126
Well if people do get mad over that, maybe I'm misunderstanding things said about me and I'm one of the more hated people ever.

But I'm pretty sure I'm a great judge of character. Just look at the Skype group that yell at me, or the people that beat me up every Friday, or my alcoholic abusive friends. Can't get enough of me.

>"Hold it right there, criminal!"
>You lower your peach slice back down into your fruit salad.
>Turning your gaze towards the familiar voice, you spot a pink filly with a tiara sitting atop her head staring at you.
"What is it now, Diamond? And what's with the get-up. Nightmare Night's not for 6 more days."
>"I know right...I look amazing."
"Riiiight....listen, I'm trying to enjoy my fruit salad here. So why don't you go play with Silver Fork or something."
>She shoots you an unamused glare and trots past you while flipping her mane to the other side of her neck.
>And she hops onto the bench beside you.
>"Why can't I show my special somepony my special cute costume."
>She hops onto your seat, then rises up to press her muzzle to your ear.
>"I even got...fuzzy cuffs."
>You place a hand on her mane.
>She leans into your touch, smiling with her eyes closed.
"Yeaaah...."
>Then push her head down, forcing her to sit down on the bench.
"We're not dating."
>"Oh don't be like that. Besides, the law states that you can date any pony with a cutie mark, regardless of age."
"And what law says that?"
>Diamond Tiara presses her side against you.
>"Diamond's Law of Love."
"I've read up on Equestrian Law, and that one is a load of cow manure."
>The young, pink filly starts rubbing her side against yours.
>"Don't worry, my dad can make it possible. All I have to do is flutter my eyes and pout my adorable lips, and I'll have him wrapped around my hoof."
>You take a bite of your food.
>God this apple is delicious.
"I'd highly doubt that your father will make a law to allow us to date. He may be rich, but he's not an idiot."
>She hops off the bench and rolls her eyes.
>"Just you wait," she says under her breath before walking off.
>You sigh and get back to munching on your lunch.
>"Finally. Peace and quiet."

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>>25813913
>It's now nightmare night.
>You're ready to see the ponies have a night of fun dressed up as monsters, heroes, royalty, and everything else their minds can come up with.
>You start the day off right with a shower followed right into breakfast.
>But before you can get any satisfaction from your stack of flapjacks, you hear a loud knock at the door.
>Groaning, you head over and open it.
>There, standing in her Policemare's costume is the one and only Diamond Tiara.
>And she's wearing her usual smug grin.
>"Oooh...Anon."
"...Tiara."
>You stare each other down for a while until the filly makes the first move.
>She shoves a newspaper against your thigh.
>"Read it and weep."
>You snatch the paper from her hoof and look at the front page.
>Her smirk never leaves her face.
"Fine, fine. Hm. looks like your mom made the paper...shoving her tongue into the Mayor's fart bo-"
>"No, you idiot! Not that one. Below it."
>You look down below the article and start reading.
>Out of your sight, the smirk on Diamond's face grows wider.
"Okay...New law passed by Mayor Mare. Local hyooman male must befriend local cute, pink filly and do whatever she says, or face...imprisonment. The fuck is this!? Some kind of joke!?"
>"See, told you I can get whatever I want."
"This is bullshit! Why would she pass this law!?"
>"Oh...let's just say she needed funds for...reasons."
>Your perfect day just been ruined by the ineptitude of this town's Mayor.
"Wait! Twilight wouldn't back this law."
>"Not when it's spun to strengthen the bonds of our 'friendship'."
"You fiend..."
>"I know. Aren't I grand?"
>Diamond rubs a hooficured hoof against her chest before looking at it.
>Her smug smile never leaves that muzzle of hers.
>You sigh and fall to your knees.
"This is fucking great..."
>"Of course it is. Now, kiss me."
"What? Why should I-"
>"Ahem..."
>You look outside and see three guards glaring daggers at you.
>"So as I was saying...I demand cuddles and kisses."
>This...fucking...filly.

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>>25813913
My my, it's been too long. You have no idea how happy I am to see you out and about.

>>25813925
This was great.
Reminds me that I have a very graphic humanized Sweetie Belle lewd story I need to finish.

>>25813961
I've just been busy to really write much, outside short non-pony things between school work.

I just wanted to post the one thing I wrote that's related to this thread. Now that I'm out, I'll see if I can just do shorts here and there. Not trying to pull out a saga type thing like before.

>>25814002
Thanks

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>>25814012
>>25814028

I'm looking forward to whatever you have in store.


Anyone else feel that winter is a magical time of the year for us?

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>>25814067
No, because it's Summer, which to me just says that people are indoors to avoid the heat and fires.

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>>25814248
Are you saying that the magical time is during the summer, or that right now, to you, the weather and shit is summer-like, in which case, tell me about the world you live in.

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>>25814304
that fuckin picture

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>>25814304
Well the weather is currently 'Summer', and this 'magical time' for me is staying indoors and writing about similar heat related things you'll see next month.

So really I'm taking the piss in saying that it's only a magical time in bringing people here to write because, since I'm only experiencing temperatures to make it hot and sweaty, that everyone is just staying in their air conditioning and writing.
It was a lousy joke to imply Australia is the center of the world... or at least this thread, despite how there's only like 1 or 2 (maybe 3?) regular people from here.

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You want green? you got it. Time for a One-two punch!

>While swords of men clash outside of it's secure walls, the Hall of Trandor is silent.
>Queen Chystonia sits on her throne, staring at the entrance to the place of celebration.
>Her twelve armored guards stand still, swords drawn and ready for battle.
>Screams and grunts of warriors permeate the cracks of the stone walls.
>The battle is almost over and it is not in the favor of the Trandorians.
>One guard at the front of the pack shakes in his leather boots.
>His eyes hold fear.
>He isn't ready to die.
>His eyes dart around the room, unsure of what to do.
>Then, silence.
>The uncomfortable silence before the storm.
>The silence where there's only the sound of your heart beating and dull, high-pitched white noise.
>WHAM!
>The doors to the hall buckle under a strong force.
>The guards jump and prepare themselves.
>WHAM!
>"I want him alive," says the Queen.
>The guard gulps in terror.
>Then, with one last crash, the doors swing wide, revealing the hero of our story.

>You.

>You are a fierce, powerful warrior that's feared as far as words can be carried.
>The slaughterer of villages.
>The owner of vast riches.
>And stealer of hearts.
>Today, Trandor is your prime target and all is going according to plan.
>Not that you really had a plan.
>The plan kinda went like this.
>1. Swing your axe.
>2. Don't get hit.
>3. Repeat until nobody fights.
>4. Steal, eat, and become satisfied.
>Not necessarily in that order.
>You raise your axe as you count the guards in the room as they charge towards you.
>Twelve.
>Child's play.
>You duck and lunge towards your assailants, your blood-soaked axe of war prepared to cut down those who stand in your way.
>The leading guard raises his sword to strike, but you dodge to the left before he can swing.
>As you dodge, you turn your whole body, using your body weight as additional force for your attack.
>The axe cuts clean through his frame as you head towards the next two guards.
1/11

>>25814422
>They hesitate, caught off guard by your brutal onslaught.
>A dire mistake.
>The last mistake they'll make.
>With another swing, there are two less guards with good heads on their shoulders.
>One charges forward, sword quickly heading towards your face.
>You move the handle of the axe to block his attack.
>The slice ricochets off of the handle and the guard loses his balance.
>Using the butt of your weapon's handle, you pound the guard's forehead and he falls to the ground.
>Holding the axe with one arm, you swing in a full circle behind you, causing large gashes into three that try to get the jump on you.
>The three fall down as five guards remain close to the Queen.
>You turn to the Queen, eyes focused and expression powerful.
"You know who I am," you grunt.
>"I do," Queen Chystonia replies. "You are the warrior with no name. The one who brings to destruction to villages and towns for entertainment."
>A smile curls on your face.
"Then you know what I am here to do."
>"Yes," she replies coolly. "But I will not allow you to harm more of my people."
>The woman steps forward, her black garbs trailing behind her.
"Is that so?" you laugh. "How you intend to stop me?"
>She raises her hand to the emerald pendant around her neck as her eyes flash a brilliant shade of green.
>"By using the magic that's been passed down through our tribe for generations."
>The jewel glows a bright lime light that fills the whole room.
>The sudden shine blinds you, and you attempt to cover your face.
"What is this magic?!"
>"Equius! Solarum! Enterium!"
>The light focuses down to a singular point in the center of her jewel.
>She points at you as the lime green light bolts towards you like lightning.
>You eyes grow wide in surprise, but you can't even catch your breath before the attack envelops you.
>You can feel your body become weightless and hover in the air, but the light is too bright to see anything but white.
2/11

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>>25814384
Ah, gotcha. Man that is bizarre to me. Being scorching HOT during the winter.
>>25814422
OH SHIT
NUGGET AND A BISCUIT
and checked

>>25814436
>Shutting your eyes, you try to shut out the burning sensation that saps your muscles of energy.
>Then, gravity pulls back on you and you fall to the ground.
>But instead of dirt or stone, your face comes in contact with soft grass.
>You groan, trying to push your body to rise to it's feet, but it's no use.
>You try to open your eyes, but even your eyelids won't cooperate with you.
>The world around you becomes quiet and gentle, covering you like a blanket as you slowly lose consciousness.

~~~~

>When you come to, you hear the gentle breeze of the wind rustling through the trees.
>The soft caress of the grass under your palms.
>You open your eyes and attempt to take an inventory of your current body parts by wiggling them.
>Arms. Check.
>Hands. Check.
>Feet. Check.
>Legs. Check.
>The most important part.
>...
>Still got it.
>Stretching your muscles, you roll over and groan away some of the aches and pains.
>"O-oh! Oh dear. Ohhh dear. Why did it have to be me?" a voice says.
>You sit up quickly, searching your surroundings for your trusty axe, but find it nowhere.
>Looking around, you notice there anyone else around either.
>But what you did find, was bright.
>Everything was bright.
>Everything.
>The world was imbued of pastel hue that was hard on the eyes.
>You turned to find a miniature horse behind you, with a flowing purple mane and.
>Wait.
>Wait just one moment.
>Could it be?
>Have the legends of old come true?
"A unicorn," you mutter under your breath. "Surely the fates have smiled upon me on this day."
>"O-oh! You know how to talk!" she says as she approaches you.
>You quickly raise your hand and slap the shit out of the evil beast in front of you.
"YOU SPEAK THE TONGUE OF MAN! BACK AWAY FOUL DEMON!"
>"Ooow! Hey! What's the big idea, mister?" whines the white unicorn. "I don't know where you come from, but we tend not to assault our welcomed guests. This is hardily a proper way to treat a lady."
3/11

>>25814422
Does this mean I read something you haven't even posted here yet when I looked at your pastebin recently?

I don't know why but that makes me feel special.
I enjoyed it

>>25814454
>You raise your fists for battle.
"You have caught me on a merciful day, wretched beast. I seek revenge against the Queen Crystonia of Trandor. Point me in the right direction and I may spare your life."
>She looks at you in confusion.
>"Trandor? What? I've never heard of a-"
"Of course! How could I be so careless! You are surely a spy for the Trandorians!"
>Her eyes dart around and she takes a step back.
>"This was -not- what I signed up for," she whispers under her breath.
"Little did you know that I have seen through your clever ruse and now you shall pay the price!"
>You charge toward the horse as she raises her hooves to strike.
>Dodging to the right, you evade her grasp and leap upon her back.
>She whinnies in surprise and tries to buck you off.
"It's no use to resist! You will take me to your leader!" you shout.
>Finally, she stands completely still and sighs.
>"Fine. I was going to anyway. But could you at least get off of me?"
>She turns her head to look back at you, her gaze as hot as thermite.
"You are my new steed. Now ride!"
>She turns her gaze forward to a small town in the distance.
>"You have got to be kidding me."
"RIDE!"
>You pull on her hair like reins.
>"I WILL MURDER YOU IF YOU TOUCH MY HAIR!" she screams.
>You let go of the hair.
>She stares back at you angrily.
>"Hmph," she grunts, before taking slow, laborious steps towards the village.
>The steed is clearly not meant for long range travel.
>She will require breaking in and training.
>However, she will lead you back to the Queen of the Trandors.
>Which will allow you your revenge.
>Or, she will lead you to a trap.
>Which will only delay the inevitable.
>"So, what... sort... of animal... are you?" the horse asks, breathing hard under the strain
"I am the warrior of no name! Surely my reputation proceeds me?" you proclaim.
>"Uhm. I'm afraid not. Sorry. Is that some sort of sporting nickname? I've never quite been into sports, darling."
4/11

File: 1302563874501.jpg (64KB, 364x346px) Image search: [Google]

64KB, 364x346px

>>25814466
"AH! YES! The best sport. The sport of blood! The sport of seeing your enemies kneel before you and-"
>"Ah! Say no more. You're one of those... Oh, what's the name? Hockey! Hockey players. Much too violent for my tastes, dear. Now if you were into fashion-"
"Silence, steed! I grow tired of your voice."
>"Well excuse me. You could at -least- be kind enough to ask me by name."
"Speak your name, Equine!"
>"My name is Rarity," she says.
"This name is too sensitive for a war-horse," you assert. "Your name shall be Dawnbringer."
>"Wait. Wha-"
"Silence, Dawnbringer! The village approaches. We dare not tip off the locals with your annoying, high-pitched voice."
>Rarity shakes in anger, muttering under her breath as she continues to strain under the weight of your body.
>The clay and straw houses pass by in careful rows.
>Many other differently colored horses pass by on your quest, but to your surprise, none are colors of horse that you've grown accustomed to.
>Instead of brown, white, or black, they are all sorts of colors and certainly much smaller than what you've seen in your travels.
>What was this curious place, filled with so many ponies and unicorns?
>And then, you gasp, digging your heels in the ground to stop Dawnbringer in her tracks.
>She groans.
>"What?!"
"Shhh," you shush her.
>Could it be?
>"What in the world are we stopping for?"
"Stay here," you say bringing a hand to her ear. "I'll be back."
>"What on earth are yo-"
>You begin scratching behind her ear.
>"Oh. Ooh. Ooooh. Yeah. Okay. Take your time. I-I'll be here. Doing. Things."
>Retracting your arm, you begin to tip-toe towards your target.
>Surely, this is the alpha of the pack.
>Unicorns were certainly not uncommon here, but this was the first you had seen of this beast.
>The legendary pegasus.
>If you could tame this animal, you could take to the skies and bring doom from above.
>It's the perfect companion.
5/11

>>25814483
>And one, with carefully tucked wings, walked in front of you, unsuspecting of your presence.
>You tip-toe toward the yellow pegasus carefully, hold your breath to attempt to shroud yourself.
>Many of the other town's inhabitants stop to watch as you stalk your prey.
>Almost there.
>Just a second.
>Aaannd.
>You leap toward the pegasus and tackle it to the ground.
>With a loud shriek, the beast underneath you calls for help in it's native tongue.
>You wrap a hand around her muzzle and laugh in triumph.
>"Resistance is futile! You are now mine to do with as I please! I am now your master! The sooner you give up, the sooner I will release you!"
>The pony goes quiet as Dawnbringer gallops up to you.
>"Get off of poor Fluttershy!" she commands.
>You release her muzzle as the beast whimpers.
>"O-oh. Uhm. I-it's okay, Rarity. I-I knew this would happen some day. S-some animal wouldn't try holding it in anymore and would... well. Uhm. I just hoped it wouldn't be so... public," she replies.
>Dawnbringer's mouth hangs open.
>"O-oh. Too much information?" she asks.
"I don't think I want to tame this horse anymore," you say, rising to your feet.
>Fluttershy looks up at you and pouts.
"Dawnbringer, back to the course."
>"B-but..." Fluttershy stutters.
>"We'll just keep this our secret, darling," Dawnbringer says. "I have to bring this... uhm. Warrior, to Twilight."
>"Oh. I see," she says following in tow with the unicorn. "Why is he calling you Dawnbringer?"
>"Long story, darling."
>"I have time," a pink horse says.
>You have no more than seconds before the pink mare is within inches of you.
>An ambush!
>You should have known!
>Leaping off of Dawnbringer, you spring into attack mode.
>You tackle the pink mare and the two of you go rolling through town, struggling for control.
>Grabbing two of her hooves, you pin her to the ground, her puffy mane covering her face.
>She giggles loudly and lightly kicks her legs.
6/11