Satyr Abomination Thread #142: Free Spa Treatments Edition

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Aloe, Lotus, and the kids are offering free spa treatments for the holiday season, as a huge thank you to their patrons.
Who's coming? what shenanigans unfold?

>>25691786
Can I get a massage with a happy ending? Or are they professionals who takes their current jobs seriously?

>>25691931
There's no reason that happy endings can't be taken seriously. If you give one to the wrong customer, you'll get reported and then your business gets shut down. Happy endings are VERY serious business.

>>25691786
So... which Spa twin has which satyr?
Or is one of them the mother of both? If so, which one?

>>25692180
Aloe is to Volupia and Lotus is to Baelnum.

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Golden Harvest is the daughter of Carrot Top. Like the Apple family, her mother has her business as a farmer, though they harvest carrots instead of apples. Golden Harvest is usually depicted as a mellow, down-to-earth satyr who helps her mother tend her garden, or volunteering in the soup kitchen.

Golden Harvest has a charming, homely appearance that makes her a wonderful vendor in the marketplace, but people also have the false assumption that it makes her naive and gullible in terms of haggling. In fact, Golden Harvest has a very pique intuition that often gets her out of messy situations should she adhere to them. She's extremelly jealous and envious of the Apples as she perceives their success and size are attributed to them strongarming their way through small local agriculture businesses.

She could easily befriend Leaf, Roseluck's satyr daughter, and bond over their love of horticulture.

I propose that her aspirations would include owning her own cooking show and making a big name brand like the Apple family, and show carrots can be just as good and versatile as apples.

>>25692194
Actually, it's pronounced Balneum.

>>25692388
>"Hello everypony! Welcome to another episode of of 'The Carrot Garden.' Now today, we'll be remastering one of ponykind's favorite deserts, the Carrot Cake, only with a twist. Who's ready to try their first Carrot Cake Pie?"

>>25691786
What's he so depressed about?

>>25691920
>I don't know about the other guy, but in my headcanon human hunters are fairly sparse due to the amount of work, commitment, and danger with relatively low reward. I usually imagine that it takes ten years for a human to become a full fledge hunter. Plus, it's not like Equestria is a small place, there's a good amount chance a town you pass can have a small monster problem (like Dire Rats in the basement).
All of this.

>>25692443
Heck, I'd watch that

>>25691786
I don't like these satyrs. Stop talking about them.

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>>25692649

>>25692680
I like her expression. She doesn't even care. She's just super frank.

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>>25692649

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>"Hey there!"
>The young lady Leaf smiles down at you, flashing jewelry you didn't know she had.
>Adjusting your glasses, you clear your throat.
"Not to be rude, but isn't your dad going to murder you later, Leaf?"
>The satyr prances on her hooves, nearly knocking books out of your hands
>"Sterling, you worry too much! Life is about having fun! Here! Have a flower!"
>She stuffs a tulip down your shirt and skips away, the scent of sweet happiness exuding her
>From behind her, Golden Harvest slows her job and rests, her breaths loud and gasping
>"L-Leaf, come back..."
>You cock your eyebrow at the carrot girl
"I bet you told her not to do it."
>"She never listens!"

Leaf don't take orders from nobody.

>>25692550
>due to the amount of work, commitment, and danger with relatively low reward
And what makes it so different for Simmer and Broil that they decide to do it for a living?
>I usually imagine that it takes ten years for a human to become a full fledge hunter.
Let's say it takes ten years. How long did it take for this pro Femanon to master the art of monster hunting, meet Fizzle and have kids after she and the other humans ended up in Equestria? And what are the odds that another human didn't become a monster hunter as well during that time?
>(like Dire Rats in the basement).
So it's kinda like a dead-end job?

I hate that monster hunter headcanon. I prefer a slightly different idea where this Femanon is a regular hunter who teaches her kids how to hunt and prepare their own food so they never have to go hungry or waste money on food at the store.

>>25693044
>And what makes it so different for Simmer and Broil that they decide to do it for a living?
It's no different for them. Monster hunting isn't likely to make them rich or famous, but it's what they've been trained for all their life by their parents. It's essentially the only thing they know how to do, and they're good at it. Also, they enjoy the excitement and adrenaline rush of the fight.

>How long did it take for this pro Femanon to master the art of monster hunting, meet Fizzle and have kids after she and the other humans ended up in Equestria?
Who knows, but presumably Femanon was a monster hunter for some time before she settled down. Maybe she got sucked into Equestria as a child and was taken in by a gang of monster hunters who trained her from a young age, just like she trained Simmer and Broil?

>And what are the odds that another human didn't become a monster hunter as well during that time?
I'm sure quite a few humans could have become monster hunters, but that still doesn't necessarily mean there are all that many, and it certainly doesn't mean that they'd have been able to permanently exterminate every monster in Equestria. Trying to killi all monsters would be as futile as trying to exterminate mosquitoes. New monsters will constantly show up - the job of monster hunters is just to make sure they don't cause any trouble for the civilized population.

>So it's kinda like a dead-end job?
Depends on how you look at it. I doubt it would be considered a luxurious job. Of course, killing rats in people's basements is pretty much the bottom of the barrel even for monster hunting.
I'd imagine many monster hunters start off with small easy jobs like that before moving on to tougher monsters.

>>25693044
>I prefer a slightly different idea where this Femanon is a regular hunter who teaches her kids how to hunt and prepare their own food so they never have to go hungry or waste money on food at the store
I'm sure plenty of monsters are edible.

>>25693044
>And what makes it so different for Simmer and Broil that they decide to do it for a living?
They're half-dragon. They can take more calculated risks due to their durability and stamina. A regular human would take ten years to become as conditioned and fit. Ponies, of all kind, fluctate around 6-8 years. Griffons tend to take five years, and minotaurs take two. Both of them would take five years to become adequate hunters with their mother's training.

>Let's say it takes ten years. How long did it take for this pro Femanon to master the art of monster hunting, meet Fizzle and have kids after she and the other humans ended up in Equestria? And what are the odds that another human didn't become a monster hunter as well during that time?
I headcanon that all of the humans can voluntarily enter Equestria through a portal. She went to Equestria and started at eighteen after a disassociation with the Royal Guard. It took her nine years to complete her training (because she really really wanted to finish as quickly as possible), and after four years as a certified hunter (two solo, and two in a team), she meets Fizzle and settles down to have Simmer and Broil. There's an easy chance that other humans could have made it, just as there's an easy chance for humans to drop out.

>So it's kinda like a dead-end job?
I never said that. I meant that you can expect atleast one instance of monsters causing a nusance in a village if it's not a full fledge threat dealing with other serious monsters.

>>25693236
This post gets a lot of things right too. Plus, you could eat a lot of variety of monsters if you wanted. It depends on the monster though. I actually have a headcanon that Broil wants to start a cookbook for fellow hunters in the field. But she doesn't really know about the intricacies of preserving meats, skinning and cleaning a carcass, etc.

>>25693441
>They're half-dragon. They can take more calculated risks due to their durability and stamina.
So it's kinda like "Everyone sucks but drakes because they're half dragon"?

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Desirae is the daughter of Mrs. Harshwhinny, the primary scout and inspector of the Equestria Games. Like her mother, Desirae has a very strict sense of professionalism when it comes to business, however she decides to display it in an eager exuberance rather than hiding it under a grumpy fascade.

Although she's cheerful at most times, she often curtly demands friends and family members not to visit her at any of the small jobs she takes to fill up her resume. While she takes great strives in getting achievements in her field of work (whether it's a buger flipper or a secretary), she'd really like for her father to spend more time with her and her mother.

Desirae is often a staunch optimist whenever things start to go her way, but once it's clear that a task might be more difficult than expected, she overexaggerates and takes a fatalist stance at the situation, believing that everything is ruined and that there's nothing anyone could do to fix it. She often snaps out of it when the problem is solved through teamwork or sheer force of will.

I think that Desirae should strive to become a corporate trainer and motivational speaker, and, if luck would have it, own her own company.

>>25693014
This is super cute

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>>25693786
"Daddy, please come outside. The snow is beautiful."
>"Desirae, it is barely 20 degrees out there. I could possibly catch hypothermia and lose a finger. My fingers are valuable."
"But daddy--"
>"No. No buts, young lady. I am a busy man, as your mother is a busy mare, and you a striving businesswoman. If an authority figure tells you no, you either change the paradigm or accept fate."
>He stares at you, your winter coat bloating your figure
>"And take that damn thing off. You look like you've gained thirty pounds."
>He closes the door to his study, pushing you out, leaving you speechless and numb
"D..."

>>25693646
Dragons are pretty bad ass. There's no denying that.
Being half one presumably has its perks.

>>25693646
I never said that. They can do it because they have a host of other skills that humans and most ponies lack. But there are skills that they lack in too. Griffons are faster, minotaurs are sgignificantly stronger, etc. And there are some satyrs that could do become a hunter in less than five years, if they wanted to make it a commitment.
>>25693893
This too.

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>>25693886
S-so mean

>>25693014
Gave me a small chuckle.

>>25693886
And now I'm sad.
I'd love to see more like this.

What would a ghost satyr look like?
And I don't mean the ghost of a dead satyr, but a living satyr that is half human and half ghost.

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>>25694091

>>25694045
I can produce nice shorts when I have an idea of what I should be going wiht.

>>25694091
Same as a regular satyr, I guess.
Human top-half
Pony-Ghost bottom-half

>>25694091
>What would a ghost satyr look like?
Have you visited the Strange Waifu threads? Maybe ask them.

>>25694213
Yes, I used to follow SWT, but it died a while ago.

>>25694225
Oh...my condolenses. I went to the thread a couple of times and read some stuff. I liked the dullahan.

>>25694273
It used to have a lot of good stuff. Unfortunately, most of the promising stories got abandoned before they were finished.

>>25691807
Sapphire would come with Laika and try to get her to sit still.

>>25694483
To the spa sisters' annoyance, Laika jumps into the mudbath between each and every treatment. They then have to hose her down. Again.

Sapphire just puts her head down, and pretends she hasn't noticed anything.

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You're a disgrace, Anon.

Letting the dog sleep on the bed like that.

>>25695484
New Groot!

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Who would do this with their baby?

>>25695484
This is totally adorable. Too bad she doesn't have a hole to put it in.

>>25695538
Dash's husband. He'd think it would be the funniest thing since Dane Cook.

>>25695510
Has there ever been more? I can only find two, and both by the same guy :(

>>25695539
Anon was able to stick it into it's mom, so she must... somewhere. I dunno.

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>>25695571

>>25695571
How would it even feel once you're inside of it? Splinters? Sawdust? Polished wood? Wet moss?

>>25695634
Maybe, just maybe, Groot doesn't have sex.
>"Listen... I'm sorry... I've hurt people before, and I don't want to hurt you."

>>25695588
Fukken' saved. Cheers pal!

>>25695634
I dunno. I just tried to ask on Derpibooru (and upload that other Groot pic) but I'm still banned.

>>25695677
Cuddleslut, belly rubs, and blowjobs it is then.

>>25695757
There.
I approve of this message.

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>>25695465
>>25695484
>Anon pulls a stick off Groot's leg
>Throws it and tells both her and Laika to go fetch
>They run after the stick
>But Anon still has it in his hand
>Tfw they find out

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>You smell her piney hair, spooning comfortably
>She snores lightly, leaving you to your thoughts
>You pluck a splinter from your crotch and toss it into the ever growing pile behind you
>You let off a soft sigh
>Being able to give a girl this comfort, you couldn't ask for anything more

>ITT: Satyrs get things off of their chest

"You remember that one pet field mouse you kept and then it ran away the next week? Well I found it and kept it and took it home to be my pet. For about two hours. Then I ate it." -Alex

>>25696154
"I didn't mean to end the party that early, mom." - Pogo

>>25696130
Have you ever had a splinter near the groin?

>>25696154
"Sometimes, I imagine you're Darcy." -Melody to Presto

>>25696154
"He's not really /that/ good at sex." -Broil.

>>25696183
>"Me too." - Orion

>>25696183

"You're talking to a hat rack, Melody." -Presto to Melody

"Sometimes, I dream about Treble." -Dee

>>25696183
That was horrible

>>25696289
Then it got better

>>25696154
"I once got a blowjob from Pogo when I thought he was Mumble... He swallowed." - Timber

>>25695634
Fruit flesh.

>>25696453
>He swallowed
>"When he swallowed, I knew I made a big mistake."

>>25696154
"I watch you sleep at night." ~Your Secret Admirer

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>>25696154
"I once called another babysitter to cover for me for an hour while I went to pick some things up from the store. I didn't actually have to go to the store, I just didn't want to deal with this kid's absolutely epic blowout." -Tonbo

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>>25696563
>"WHAT DO YOU MEAN THERE'S NO MO CHICKEN TENDIES!?!?" - Anon

Does anyone else listen to lewd audio and imagine it's a satyr?

>>25696982
https://youtu.be/mvkVlywIjIE

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>>25696982
If you've got audio clips of a girl moaning out "daddy", hook a guy up.

>>25696982
I have a sort of were-bimbo audio that's heavily BE-focsed. I occasionally break out and imagine it's Ace. I feel pretty gross afterwards.

>>25696982

https://soundgasm.net/u/Rusfemanon/Making-your-ass-mine

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>>25696982
http://chirb.it/7fgvNO Sometimes I imagine this as Glimmer and Rory
>>25697012
http://soundgasm.net/u/yourdirtybaby/Happy-Daddys-Day
http://soundgasm.net/u/sexuallyspecific/F4M-Daddys-little-princess-earns-some-ice-cream-Ageplayincestroughfacefucking

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>>25696154
"I take my brother's dessert out of his lunch bag and stuff it in mine, so whenever he questions why Mom gave me while he got none, I say it's because I'm twice the brother you'll ever be. And then he gets all sad so I just split it with him anyway...damn it." -Muddle

>>25697454
I really like the idea of Muddle being, reluctantly, a great older brother

>>25697522
He probably keeps Gargle crayon drawings in his draw. He's as sentimental as his mother, but begrudgingly so.

What do we actually know about Gargle and Freckle?

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>>25697813
Gargle's usually depicted as the textbook goody-two shoes little brother, polite and adorable as opposed to Muddle's jerkiness. Gargle looks past his brother's abrasive attitude and sees him as a stand up guy. He'd do almost anything to earn Muddle's respect, but is continuously picked on for being such a wimp. It's not like Muddle hates him or anything, since he's quick to defend him from any threatening bullies and spends time trying to get him to act more dragony.

>>25698015
>"Watch this, big bro!"
>Gargle blows a measly spat of ember, then throws up his arms, expecting encore
>While you roll your eyes, dad walks by and snorts a bigger one
>"Hey kiddo, maybe you should wait until you actually have something to show."
>As your younger brother's lips quiver, you facepalm
>Ugh, now you /have/ to say something nice

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>>25698209
Kek. I could hear the sad violins from here.

And speaking of stringed instruments, Treble is the daughter of the classically trained pony musician Octavia. Treble is a well-known emerging musician in her own right, taking up the cello like her mother before her. Her classy airs and prim and proper personality make her seem cold at first, but in reality she yearns for an outlet away from the continuous recitals, practice sessions, and tutoring lessons she teaches colts and fillies.

While in public, her speech is well-mannered and polite, but in the house with her brother Clef, she swears and hurls insults like a monkey throws its fruit. The two of them often go at it with their sibling rivalries over the pettiest things, but often come together for a relaxing improptu session in their father's jazz band.

Though her prim airs will take time to fade, if a satyr can manage to get her attention, she'll slowly reveal a softer (and a tad more crass) side. She'd obviously hang out with her (honorary) Aunt Vinyl's daughter Dee, despite the jarring differences in taste. But both of them like to frequent raves and concerts, or have an occassional drink (or four) at The Forbidden Fruit, a local bar ran by the eldest Apple satyr daughter, Darcy.

I think, while Treble makes for a spectacular musician, her main desire is to compose. She would love to compose an original opera one day, but currently lacks the composing (and narrative) skill to do so.

>>25699051
Muh heart

>>25699282
Why does Octavia have back-teats?

>>25699282
Wonderful bit there! Let me see what I can make out of it...

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>>25699336
Huh. Never noticed that. It was either between that or this.

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>>25699336
Those are dimples

>>25699282
"I told you, you brat! When I practice string, you keep wind as far away as possible!"
>"As always, a ridiculous ultimatum. You /always/ practice string."
>Throwing a guide to composing at your brother, you take the short blindness to wrestle him into submission
>Something sounded weird, like a throat clearing not even coming from him
>Tracing your eyes to the doorway, mom and Dee stand there, mom looking appalled and Dee worried
>The electronically inclined satyr looked away and rubbed her head before speaking
>"I could, uh, third wheel Jay and his punky girl if you wanna hang another time..."
>Well this is embarrassing.

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>>25699051
Icarus is looking alot like Hotshot in this pic. Though he did have an incosistant design.

>>25699446
They look to be teens. Lot of teens usually do try something different with their hair. Icarus with a rainbow colored faux hawk... I can shiggy that diggy

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>>25699417
Nice. Do you think other siblings relate to Clef and Treble's sibling rivalry?
>>25699508
Prism would talk so much shit about his hair do

>>25699611
YES! Makes fun of his hair do, baby talks his cute dick? These two are one of my favorite pairs of siblings.

>>25699661
Icarus would be so infuriated but can't think of a good retort until it's too late. He wasnts to make sure she hasn't told his friends about his allegedly cute dick, but he doesn't want to straight up ask that.

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Incest smut? Incest smut.

>You are Anon, happily-married husband of Twilight Sparkle.
>You are as thrilled as you were confused when the two of you discovered that you had the ability to procreate.
>You argued chromosomes and DNA; Twilight argued magic and wizards.
>Guess whose argument won when Twilight's baby-bump began showing.
>Sure, you were suspicious that she was cheating on you.
>To be fair, you thought it was impossible for you to impregnate a completely different species.
>God's sake, you can't even impregnate a chimpanzee, and lord know you tried.
>Closest living species your ASS.
>Anyway, the result of your unnatural coupling was a half-human, half-pony hybrid that you decided to name "Midnight Magic".
>Partly because Twilight likes names that have to do with times of day.
>Partly because "midnight magic" was exactly what spawned your daughter.
>You're proud to admit that you only vomited a little bit when Midnight was born.
>And you know what? Twilight cried in secret for just a few short months.
>She's a real trooper, her.
>God is dead, and you killed him.

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>>25700192
>Anyway, it's been about nine years since your daughter was born.
>Just this morning, Midnight Magic earned her cutie mark!
>Oh, you and Twilight were so proud of her. Twilight especially.
>She kept hugging Midnight and crying about how she was "coming of age" and stuff.
>You asked her about it, but all she told you was that they had to do something special for your daughter.
>In all honesty, you aren't sure what she meant by that.
>A party, maybe?
>Look, you never actually knew that parent-child dynamics were different in Equestria.
>You had no reason to assume otherwise, so don't grill you on this.
>Anyway.
>"Of age" or not, Midnight Magic is still a little filly and she still has a bedtime.
>You made sure that today was a memorable day for your daughter, and you're sure she's all tuckered out.
>And to celebrate your wonderful daughter, you and your horsewife are making love together.

>It started with some heavy kissing.
>You trailed kisses across her jaw, making sure to savour the feeling of Twilight's soft, downy fur against your lips.
>Her moans vibrated against your lips as you trailed them down her neck, down her chest, and across her squirming tummy.
>You gently caressed Twilight's teats (taking great care not to twist them), teasing the hardening buds of ponyflesh just the way she likes it.
>"Ah! Ah-Anon! Don't tease me!"
>Her chest is heaving.
>Oh, you think you'll tease her all you like, thank you.
>A few gentle licks brings her nipples to full attention.
>The elasticity of her flesh makes them bounce back into position after you drag the entire length of our tongue over them.
>Twilight is making the most delicious noises.
>She isn't even bothering to be quiet for your daughter this time.
>"O-oh! Puh-please, Anon! I can't t-take it any more!"
>As you wish, princess.
>You press your tongue against her winking clit, an-
>>"Mommy? Daddy?"
>Oh fuck.

More tomorrow. Actual satyr terror next post.

>>25700197
Looking forward to it.

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>>25700197
Not a fan of the hoers choice, but still ready for some satyr lewd.

Which satyrs have been best friends ever since childhood?

>>25701435
The Mane Six satyrs

>>25701435
Simmer and Broil. Only friends, pretty much.

>>25693014
That girl needs a spanking.

>>25702268

Cute art/10. I'd reccomend investing in some sort of scanner if you have the money for it.

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line started. gotta go to work, be back later.

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>>25702694
Even the Timberwolf girl has great thighs. It's always great getting good looking art for unknown satyrs.
>>25702268
Kawaii. I picture Cherry Popper more as a city girl than her mother.

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>"Oh my god."
>Radiance groaned and dragged his hands down his face as he lay on top of his bed and stared up at the ornate ceiling above.
>"Are you okay? What's the matter Radi?"
>The prince sat up to see his younger sister peaking her head through his doorway.
"Nothing, don't worry about it."
>The pink haired princess frowned at hearing his dismissive tone
>Radiance sighed, returning to sulking and feeling sorry for himself.
>Ignoring her brother's hint that he wanted to be left alone, Dawn let herself into his room and made her way over to him.
>Sitting down beside him, she laid an arm across his shoulders and began twirling a lock of his shoulder length hair around her finger.
>"What's wrong? C'mon, you can tell me."
>Radiance looked away.
>"Come on, I can help."
>Once again he sighed at his sister's insistence.
"My girlfriend broke up with me, Okay?"
>Dawn patted her brother on the back.
>"Sorry."
>Radiance gave a small, appreciative smile
"I just... I just don't know what I did wrong."
>Dawn shrugged.
>"I never liked her anyway."
"She said she just couldn't deal with 'it' anymore. What does that even mean?"
>Dawn seemed to ponder that for a moment.
>"Does it mean... you know."
>Radiance furrowed his brow.
"What? Oh, you mean- No! I mean... I've never... we never did, you know... it."
>He let out an exasperated groan and slumped back down against the mattress.
"I'm such a loser! I'm fourteen years old and I've never even been with a girl. I bet all the other guys my age are getting laid every night."
>"You shouldn't worry about it."
>Sitting up once more, Radiance glared at his sister.
"What do you know about it? You're only ten. You're a little kid, Dawn."
>The younger satyr pouted and stood up from the bed, crossing her arms over her chest.
>"Yeah, but it's okay. I bet lots of boys die as virgins, so at least you won't be alone."
"Right... thanks a lot."
Which satyrs are the worst at pep talks and which had the roughest times during puberty?

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>>25699282
That's pretty neat headcanon.

Your satyr daughteru accidentally shit on the floor. What do?

>>25702807
That's kinda tough. Maybe Rory considering he lives with his sister and Thistle?
>>25702920
This isn't even a real question. What do you think?

>>25702928

>This isn't even a real question. What do you think?

You... You stick her nose in it, yeah?

>>25702954
Is she a cat?

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>>25702954
Yeah. Sure.

>>25699282

"Clef, ya fuckin' poxy cunt! Where's the fuckin' bow for me cello, you twatbag?"
>"Check up your arse, ya bloody skank."
>"Oi! Whad'ya just fuckin' say to me, you poofta? Dun' make me come up there and jab yoo inna' teeth with a screwdriver!"

I can't write accents but I imagine them sounding like this. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=M421dP1g3Sg

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>>25703076
I love Chavtavia, it cracked me up reading it. I had the very same thought about Treble, very aristocratic in public, but in the privacy of the home she goes off like proper chavette.

>>25702523
>oldart/10

>>25702807
Sorry, I can't help myself.

"Wait!"
>Dawn turned back to face her brother and tilted her head to the side curiously.
>"Yes?"
"You... You said you could help."
>"Uh huh, so?"
>"S-So... I mean, you're a girl. Do you think maybe you and I could... have sex? Not in a weird way or anything! Just so I don't have to die a virgin like you said."
>"Ooh, I see what you mean."
"So does that mean-"
>"No."
"But you said-"
>"I'm 'just a little kid' remember? You said so yourself."
>Radiance groaned in annoyance.
"I didn't mean it like that! Come on, just take your clothes off and suck it a little or something so I can at least say I've had a blowjob when my friends start bragging about getting laid again."
>"Daaaaad!"
>Radiance shot up from the bed and clamped a hand over his sister's mouth, not hard enough to hurt her but with enough force to silence her.
"What are you doing, are you nuts‽
>Dawn pulled herself free from her brother.
>"I'm telling daddy on you, pervert!"
>Radiance's eyes widened, imagining what his father would do to him if the rather intimidating man found out he'd tried extort sex from his 'precious little angel' of a daughter."
"N-No, please! I'll do whatever you want, just please don't tell dad!"
>Dawn grinned.
>"I want... I want all you dessert this month and you have to follow me around and be my slave for the rest of the day. Oh, and you have to call me m'lady."
>Radiance shook his head.
"No way."
>"Daaaad, Radiance is trying to rape m-"
>Once again he clamped his hand over his sister's mouth.
"Fine! Okay, you win, I'll do it."

This was Dawn's plan all along.

If only Radiance knew he'd grow up to be super hawt and able to get any girl he wants.

>>25703273
He griws up to marry the girl who can be EVERY girl. He has rough revenge sex with the girls who were mean to him, breaks down in tears, and has sweet normal sex with plain Mistake in the end. Every night.

>>25701435
Hope and Alex

>>25703376
Ey, thread. If the older m6 boys are about 3 years older than the younger m6 boys, what do you think a "tallest to shortestL list with them would look like? 7-10 year olds. (Meaning Icarus, Pogo, and Garnet would be 10~ with Bucky, Timber, and Rory at 7-8~)

>>25703333
Quads speak the truth.

>He has rough revenge sex with the girls who were mean to him, breaks down in tears, and has sweet normal sex with plain Mistake in the end.

"I hate you, y-you fucking bitch!"
>Sniffing, Radiance slammed his hips forwards as he gazed down into the eyes of the girl that had broken his heart when he was younger.
"Who's the loser now, h-huh?"
>Looking up at her boyfriend as he supported himself between her thighs, Mistake let her disguise drop and wrapped her arms loosely around his shoulders.
>"Baby, are you okay?"
>Radiance nodded, slowing the pace of his thrusts to a nice steady rhythm.
"M'fine... I'm okay."
>Leaning forwards, Mistake placed a kiss on the young prince's lips before pulling him closer so that his head rested in the crook of her neck.
>Running her fingers lovingly through his hair, she turned and whispered softly into his ear.
>"It's okay, you don't have to pretend with me. You don't have to try and come across as perfect."
>Radiance let out a shuddering breath and clung tightly to the girl beneath him as the rhythm of his thrusts faltered and became erratic and shallow.
"S-Sorry... I'm sorry, it's just... I thought I was over this."
>Turning, Mistake pressed her lips to his once more as the pair shared a tender, lingering kiss.
>"Shh... It's okay... Just let it all out."
>Hearing her boyfriend choke back a tear, Mistake rubbed his back soothingly and spoke softly to him.
>"It's okay to cry, I don't mind. Shh... come on now, it's okay. I love you and nothing can change that."
"Th-Thanks."
>She placed yet another kiss on him and smiled.
>"We could change positions if you like. Want me to be on top so you can just lie back and let me show you how much I adore you?"
>The black haired satyr grinned as she felt the prince nod against her shoulder.

OTP

>>25703333
>He has rough revenge sex with the girls who were mean to him
His sister too?

>>25703873
No, their dad does that often enough.

>>25703885
So? That doesn't mean Radiance can't as well. Besides, it wouldn't be revenge sex. Not unless Dawn was mean to her father as well, at least.

>>25703896
>Not unless Dawn was mean to her father as well, at least.
Dawn? Mean to her daddy? No. Never towards daddy.

>>25703923
Don't let four posts ruin your mood. Just hide them, it helps a bit.

>>25703954
True. Thanks Anon.

>>25703896
>Dawn was mean to her father

"Hey, daddy."
>"Yeah, what is it sweetie?"
"Is this your Rolex? It'd sure be a shame if something were to happen to it, huh?"
>Anon tilted his head curiously as his pre-teen daughter held his prized 24ct gold watch precariously over the toilet.
"Something like... Oh I don't know, this perhaps?"
>Letting go of her dad's prized possession, Dawn grinned at seeing his expression as it plopped down into the water and sank like a rock.
>"What are-"
"Don't worry, daddy, I'll get it back."
>Making a show of bending down to pluck the wristwatch back out, Dawn 'accidentally' leaned on the handle of the toilet and flushed.
>The young princess gave her father a shit-eating grin
"Oops, silly me."
"Daddy, wanna hear a joke?"
>"Hmm? Oh, yeah sure."
"Sex."
>"I uh... I don't get it."
"I know you don't. Lil' pussy ass bitch."

>>25703913

So she's a bitch in secret to everybody but her father and probably mother because they're the only ones who'd ever dare to punish her or even speak ill of a princess.

>>25704043
Well, when you're "daddy's little princess", and your dad is the king, it's understandable she might end up a bit spoiled.

>and probably mother
Not even Celestia and Luna are safe. They get too uppity, she'll put them down and say how easily she could become the alpha mare, often because "you're both so old".

>>25704128
>That bull shit reasoning
Bitch, this mare has put her own sister down, seen wars, lived through rebellions, and survived the anti-cuddle era of 760. You think she would ket her own daughter trump her?! TO THE FUCKING MOON! One week. Grounded. No magic. She'll see her in a week. Her room might also be a bit more empty than she remembered when she gets back. Celestia is the ruler first, mother second. Unlike Luna, she doesn't get to be a mother first.

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>>25704184
>Celestia is the ruler first, mother second
And it kills her a little inside every time she has to devote her time to running the country rather than spending time with her kids.

She'll never forgive herself for the time she missed her son's twelfth birthday because she had to attend an emergency conference to prevent a war with the griffins.

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>>25704128

>"Lord Anonymous, I really must protest! Your daughter... She, uh.. that is to say that..."
>The pony noble came to a halt mid sentence as the human dressed in full regalia turned to face him, his infamous minotaur horn war trophy hanging conspicuously from a silver chain from around his neck as he gazed down at him while carrying his daughter in one of his arms, her head resting comfortably on one of his broad shoulders.
"Yes? What about my daughter?"
>The pony cleared his throat awkwardly, eyeing up the sword that hung from the man's hip as well as the grizzly scar that ran from one of his ears along his jaw in a deep, prominent line half way to his chin.
>"She, uh... She-"
"I'm a busy man, try to remember that."
>The noble was seemingly snapped back to reality as if he'd been lost in a daydream.
>"She gets more beautiful every day, your highness... uh, sir."
>Anon thought about this for a moment before nodding and placing a kiss on his little girl's forehead as she too looked down at the pony before them dressed in his little suit and top hat.
"Yes, she reminds me so much of her mother in that respect." *
>"I-Indeed."
>The noble watched on as the King turned and continued on his way down the hall, little Dawn poking her head over her father's shoulder and cheekily sticking her tongue out at him as they went.
>After a few moments he looked down at his hoof, holding the broken remains of his pocket watch that had not survived it's encounter with the pink haired little princess earlier that very day.

*Elsewhere in the palace at this very moment, Celestia shivered in pleasure as if someone was setting new records for being a smooth ass motherfucker.

So, we now know where MT stands on tge hemipenis argument. http://minibutts.tumblr.com/post/134788254284/a-little-late-for-this-but-ivy-and-simmer-having

>>25704485
Does that mean Broil has two vaginas?
Or just one that's big enough to take both penises at once?
Or do they just have to fuck twice so he can get both his dicks off?

>>25704540
They don't fuck at all.

>>25704540
>Broil
Ivy

>>25704614
Exactly.

>>25704614
>>25704629
HFAS says otherwise

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>>25704614
You want to believe that, don't you?

>>25704654
Quit pushing your shit tier headcanon. I know the thread has incestuous elements, BUT COME THE FUCK ON. I swear, it feels like at least half the thread is full of underage faggots sometimes.

>>25704485

"Gee Simmer, why does your mom let you have two wieners?" -Timber

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>>25704728

>>25704728
"My mom knew what she was getting into when she slept with my dad. She's just grateful Broil only has one bergina." -Simmer

>>25704654
And you want to believe that they fuck each other's brains out every day like it's perfectly normal while their parents don't give two shits, don't you?

Fucking hell, I can actually dig the monster hunter thing and that they're really good friends and fighters who MAYBE experimented a little bit with each other when they were young, but the fags who keeps saying that Simmer and Broil fuck each other like horny rabbits every day have got to take the first prize for the most annoying shits in this place.

>>25704746
>She's just grateful Broil only has one bergina
Why would femanon care how many vaginas Broil has?
It's not like she's gonna get to use them... is she?

>>25704748
>And you want to believe that they fuck each other's brains out every day
Absolutely.

>while their parents don't give two shits
They give two shits, but there isn't much they can do about it. They've tried plenty of subtle tricks to stop it, but none have succeeded.
True love cannot be extinguished.

>MAYBE experimented a little bit with each other when they were young
Why would they stop just because they get older?
They're still inseparable best friends and lovers, and there's no reason why they would give that up.

>>25704746

>bergina

Spurdo please.

>>25704748
No one's saying they fuck everyday though.

>>25704837
Nah, not necessarily every day. Just when they feel like it. Sometimes they just like to cuddle naked in bed while watching TV.

>>25704184
>Anti-Cuddle Era
#KnowYourCuddleRights, #HugsNotGuns

>>25704695
>>25704748
This. So much this.

>>25704803
>subtle tricks to stop it
Then it's time that the mighty monsterhunting Femanon uses not-so subtle tricks, because ignoring it is horrible parenting.
Celestia or Luna or someone would take the kids away from their parents and separate them from each other if they found out about that shit.

>>25704910
>Celestia or Luna or someone would take the kids away from their parents and separate them from each other if they found out about that shit
>implying they aren't already busy trying to get Dawn and Radiance to marry each other

>>25704654
>>25704803
>>25704837
>>25704858
Literal cancer of the thread.

>>25705034
Oops. Forgot >>25704942

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>>25705034
>>25705050

>The zealous hardcore incest fag is back
Incest every now and then is cool, but this guy is taking it to a whole new, disturbing and retarded level. And he's dragging Simmer and Broil and a few other satyrs Radiance and Dawn for example down with him, making some hate them being mentioned more and more often.
And this thread was doing so nicely...
I am starting to suspect that he's a shitposter that knows how annoyed some people get here whenever this retarded hardcore incest crap between Simmer and Broil is brought up.

>>25705171
I really hope you're right, else that means we have someone on the same level as the drawthread faggot. Who I believe was banned from the /mlp/ draw thread and is now shitting up the /trash/ one.

>>25705342
Zimbabwe?

>>25701435
Kimmy and mera

>>25705574
That... makes sense.

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>>25704485
Huh. I always thought Muddle would be the one with the hemipenis...

>>25704803
>>25704837
>>25704910
The way I see it, there are a few ways this could go down.

>BEST END (Kirin End):
After their move to Equestria, the twins get interested in other people. Simmer attracts the attention of Ivy (either from a bad break-up from Blare or just natural curiosity) and soon they start hanging out together, eventually accepting Simmer in the Flutter fold. Broil attracts the attention of Glimmer after having a volunteer drake subject to perform tests on. Glimmer gets attracted to her around throughout the course of the experiment, and they both get into a relationship. The children are happy, Femanon is happy, the thread is happy, no incest babies.

>GOOD END (Salt 'N Pepper End):
After their move to Equestria, the twins slowly get disinterested in incest as they meet other people. Simmer comes into contact with Blare and strikes up a friendship that, while sometimes rocky and confrontational, culminates in an intense romantic attraction to each other. Blare teaches Simmer to toughen up socially while occassionally getting into heaps of trouble, and Simmer learns to cut loose and be more assertive with people. Broil eventually gets the attention of someone and starts her own relationship. The children are happy. While Femanon worries Blare is a bad influence on Simmer, she's happy that atleast he's not in a relationship with his sister. The thread is sort of okay, but saddened because Blare has a nice redemptive story with Bonnet, but the incest is over so that's good enough for them. No incest babies.

>NEUTRAL END (Tumblrverse End):
While the twins are inseperable from each other, they are not in an intimate relationship with one another. Both of them are either asexual or homosexual, and aren't looking for relationships after their move to Equestria. Femanon is upset because she wanted grandchildren, but atleast there's no incest babies.

>>25705780
>BAD END (Shame Shame Shame End):
The move to Equestria does little to curb Simmer and Broil's feelings for one another and continue their relationship. Femanon takes action by seperating the two for a number of years and cutting off communication with each other. Whether this works, it damages their relationship with their parents for a number of years. If it doesn't, both of them either run away from their respective homes and either meet up with each other and face intense opposition with society when, not if, they find out, or get lost in Equestria trying to find each other. Femanon is either devestated for ruining her relationship with her children, or actually losing them when they run away. The thread is devestated because incest is such a huge no-no in here. The children face massive problems and push back either way, and could be better. Possible incest babies.

>Worst End (Hospice On Repeat End):
Simmer gets romantically involved with Blare, but it slowly turns sour when starts getting abusing him over the years. She starts belittling him in private and public which makes him try to fix or change his behavior. After that, she starts to restrict his time out with friends. Then things escalate as Blare starts frequent for perceived wrongs or talking out of turn, hiding either claw marks or bruises under his clothes. After a certain amount of time, concerned friends and family members notice the symptoms and cut ties with Blare, using physical force if neccessary. Simmer gets traumatized and severely depressed and loses hope in finding love, Broil loses her twin, Femanon wishes she could've saw it coming, and everything's a downer ending. Thread is possibly okay with it since it can tie into best end, but squicks at the sea of emotional edge t needs to wade through for that possibility. No incest babies.

I already know which ones I like, but here's the general roadmap of autism when you get into shipping the Fizzle twins.

>>25705780
>>25705805
Those endings are all pretty shit.

>>25705848
Okay, what do you advise then?

>>25705805
>>BAD END (Shame Shame Shame End):
>The move to Equestria does little to curb Simmer and Broil's feelings for one another and continue their relationship. Femanon takes action by seperating the two for a number of years and cutting off communication with each other. Whether this works, it damages their relationship with their parents for a number of years. If it doesn't, both of them either run away from their respective homes and either meet up with each other and face intense opposition with society when, not if, they find out, or get lost in Equestria trying to find each other. Femanon is either devestated for ruining her relationship with her children, or actually losing them when they run away. The thread is devestated because incest is such a huge no-no in here. The children face massive problems and push back either way, and could be better. Possible incest babies.
That's not how you spell BEST END.

>>25705885
The best end has them possibly losing touch with the only family they've had?

>>25705863
I think I described that pretty well in one of my earlier posts, but basically the best possible outcomes I can think of are:

1. Femanon and Fizzle disapprove, but do nothing to stop it. The twins remain inseparable until eventually they move out and get a place of their own, have lots of kids and live happily ever after.

2. Femanon and Fizzle try to separate them, but at that point they're old enough and clever enough to figure out what the deal is. Instead of putting up with their parents' shit, they run away and start a successful monster hunting business. Years later, they meet up with their parents again, who now realize that while they may not approve of it, their children are consenting adults and it isn't their choice to make. Eventually they settle down, start a family and live happily ever after.

>>25705918
If someone is trying to oppress you and shit on everything you hold dear, even if they are doing it because they think it's the right thing to do, it's probably best to distance yourself from them.
It doesn't have to mean you'd permanently hate them, or never see them again, just that you're better off being somewhere out of their reach for a while.

>>25706005
Those are even more shit.

>>25706087
I prefer happy endings over sad/grimdark shit.

>>25706104
I prefer endings that don't revolve around the premise of incest being treated as if it is a normal everyday relationship to pursue, but I guess we're all in this unhappy pile of shit together.

>>25706005
But there are no consequences in this. Despite what the thread says and from what I've learned in Game of Thrones and my animus incest is a near universal taboo. There's bound to be some negatives along the way if you decide to break from societal norms, something that all satyrs already are.
>>25706087
>>25706125
If you don't like incest, any of the relationships provided above, or the idea that neither of them should have a romantic relationship with anybody, then what do you propose? What else can you actually add to this?

>>25706125
>>25706168
>the premise of incest being treated as if it is a normal everyday relationship to pursue
It doesn't have to be normal, or even be treated as such.
The important point is that there is fundamentally nothing wrong with it.
It just happens to be taboo and therefore perceived as sinful or bad by many people for no valid reason.

>>25706168
I don't mind the non-blood relationships provided above. Just that they all seem to stem from a common incestual start.

>>25706168
>If you don't like incest, any of the relationships provided above, or the idea that neither of them should have a romantic relationship with anybody, then what do you propose? What else can you actually add to this?
I've already posted what I would consider the possible "good endings" from the twins' point of view.
Your prejudices I can't help you with.

>>25706192
Not the Neutral End, did you read that? Just take it out of the four ending that don't have it as the main focus if it bothers you that much.
>>25706209
Oh, no, I just accidently replied to you.

>>25706259
Fair enough. So one ending isn't shit, I'll admit to that.

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Misery is the eldest daughter of the changeling pony Queen Chrysalis. With her third younger sister Mistake out in Equestria, and her second younger sister Catrine unprepared to take the responsibility of ruling the hive, Misery takes the place of the future heir of the changeling hive. Misery acts as Chrysalis' underling, in the midst of grooming her for leadership until she passes.

Though her quiet, eerie demeanor might come off as disturbing to those outside of the hive, she can easily show her sultry and mysterious attitude at the drop of the hat. She's slow to speak, quick to listen, and appears as if all of her movements are slowed in a thick haze. Her numerous changeling satyr siblings see Misery as a loving and caring big sister when their mother has no time to spend with them. Misery cares about the changeling subjects and worries about the state of the hive if they can't a consistant food source for them in the near future.

As successor to the throne, Misery is adept with illusionary magic, espionage, and battle tactics. Though skirmishes are now avoided with the nation of Equestria, tensions between the two still remain rather hostile after the failed invasion. She worries deeply about her sister Mistake and wishes she could abandon her duties for a moment and see how she's fairing. Coupled with the stress on her tutelage, Misery likes to hang out in the older venues where most of her siblings can't follow, and often likes having a group of people to spend time with. However, rumours of her apparant lecherous attitudes is a point of strife with her and her mother.

Though she gets saddened at the thought of her father leaving her behind, Misery would love nothing more to see the hive not just survive, but thrive in the coming years.

Do satyrs wear horseshoes, and if so are there many different kinds for varying tastes and budgets? Bump.

Are you willing to buy your daughteru that cute silver plated pair she's been wanting for her prom even though they cost an arm and a leg?

>>25707490
Well, that usually depends if ponies wear horseshoes.

>>25707490
Horseshoes sound painful to put on because I'm pretty sure you have to nail them in.

>>25707514
The horse doesn't feel much of anything though since the hoof is that tough.

>>25705171
So when you say hardcore incest, what does that imply? Is it just 'fuck-each-other-everyday' aspect of it? Because I don't think there would be a lot of chances to act on it if they're living in the same household. Just because they would have high libidos, doesn't mean that it's all-around sex all the time. They could show their affections by kissing, nuzzling, cuddling, touching, hugging, sucking, lovebites, all sorts of things that builds up the tension until they get a moment of privacy. Because remember, they still suspect that their parents don't know and would try as hard as they can to keep it a secret from them. Fizzle and their mother *do* know though, and would most definitely take action to keep the two from having as much alone time as possible. Staying up at late hours, always having one parent at the house at all times, "Emergency Family Bonding Time", curfews, all sorts of plans. The only assured place that they can't follow them would be school, but small high schools are packed full of people and don't offer as much privacy as one might think. Plus, it's easier for suspicions to spread, not an ideal place if they want to do anything there. So, realistically, they probably get off once or twice a month (no privacy means no masturbation either). Meanwhile their parents would have a perfectly healthy sex life they could hear with their pointy ears and thin walls and it both grosses them out and drives them crazier.

>>25707490

What if your daughteru thinks prom is dumb and doesn't want to go?

She could probably get those silver horse shoes if she bat her eye lashes and pouted a little though

>>25707999
>and it both grosses them out
>grosses them out
>the two SIBLINGS that are having sex with one another

That is fucking retarded, like on so many levels. And this is coming from a big incest fan and the "cancer" of the thread

At most they would be annoyed and frustrated, with the situation of not being able to get off to one another and deem it "unfair" But grossed out? Pot meet kettle much?

I personally do not like your particular interpretation of their incestuous relationship. But live and let live, I dislike a lot of shit that gets posted around here but I actually crank out one shots and discuss things that I like rather than bitch about stuff I dont like being posted.

>>25708561
^This

>"I don't wanna go to prom."
"Why's that honey?"
>Your daughter scowls, looking down at the ground
>"Because they're all little ponies and we end up dancing with their snooters between my hooters."
>...It's probably better if she doesn't go.

>>25708601

But what if she can't dance in the first place and doesn't want to look like an idiot in front of everyone?

>>25708634
That's when you do the fatherly thing and teach her to dance. Even if you have to look like a goof doing it. Speaking of
>having your little satyr daughter standing on your feet with her little hoovsies as you dance
Cute.

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>>25700197
>Why now.
>WHY NOW.
>Those parenting books Twilight gave to you to read didn't cover what to do when your kid walks in on you going down on your wife.
"O-oh, Midnight! What do y-you think you're doing out of b-bed, young lady?
>You don't really know if she heard you; your voice is being muffled by Twilight's vagina.
>MM: "I couldn't sleep, Daddy. My tummy was feeling funny."
>The bedroom door opens all the way, and light spills in.
>....Midnight apparently gives zero fucks that you're just about in position to fuck her mother.
>Your daughter walks in through the door, and the SMELL hits you.
>Tangy, bitter, and a hint of sweetness.
>Similar, but distinct from, the scent that's coming from the pussy that's about an inch away from your face.
>You slowly remove yourself from Twilight's cooter, and get a good look at your daughter.
>In the low light, you can barely make out a dark, wet patch on the crotch of Midnight's pajamas.
>Oh jesus, you think you might know what this means.
>Her first es-
>TS: "Your first estrus! Oh, come here, sweetheart, and give Mommy a big hug!"
>Midnight giggles and trots over to your bed with her strange horselegs.
>Meanwhile, Twilight turns on the magic lamp that's on her side of the bed.
>With a grunt of effort, Midnight's jumped up onto your bed and has taken your spot on top of your wife.
>You aren't sure how you feel about your own child cockblocking you.
>Still, she and Twilight are happy right now, so you guess that makes up for the lack of sex.
>TS: "Oh, Midnight, I'm so proud of you!"
>She nuzzles a giggling Midnight's face.
>TS: "You know what this means, right? Your Mommy and Daddy get to show you all the different ways your body is changing. Take off your PJ's, Midnight."
>What the actual fuck, Twilight?
>You don't WANT to be a filly-fiddler!

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>>25708904
>Too late now; Midnight is naked as the day she was born.
>Her breasts are small - VERY small, just beginning to mature. Her nipples may be that of a human's but their shape and size are almost identical to Twilight's.
>Involuntarily, your eyes travel down your daughter's naked form and settle on her crotch.
>Her pussy is red and inflamed, and you can see now that it's SOAKED with her marecum.
>Every few seconds, she winks and you and your wife.
>God that's hot.
>Despite it being your flesh-and-blood, you can feel your cock harden painfully at the sight in front of you.
>Twilight cradling your small daughter, poking around at her bits and explaining what happens and where.
>TS: "You see here?"
>Twilight gently plants a hoof onto Midnight's chest, who gasps at the sensation.
>MM: "Y-yes, Mommy."
>TS: "Milk comes from here when you have a baby. During sex, these things make you feel good."
>Midnight moans lewdly as Twilight rubs small circles on your daughter's small chest.
>She removes her hoof and trails it down Midnight's small tummy and towards her privates.
>TS: "And this is where a stallion puts his penis when you want to make babies."
>For the second time, you watch and your wife fucking masturbates your daughter in front of you.
>Midnight buries her face into the crook of Twilight's neck and moans loudly. She seems to twitch involuntarily, and thrusts her hips into her mother's hoof.
>Finally, you break out of your shock.
"Twilight!? What on earth are you doing to our daughter!"
>Twilight looks at you, confused.
>TS: "What do you mean, Anon? I'm teaching her about sex."
>She looks back down and resumes rubbing your daughter's cunt.
>TS: "Typically, a foal will hit her first estrus when she gets her cutie mark. She needs to know what to do when she meets a stallion she likes."
"Which is why you're molesting her."
>She nods happily and starts to kiss Midnight's shoulder and neck.

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>>25708597
Granted, gross might be a stronger word than I intended. But the gist still remains that they're displeased at the prospect of hearing their parents bang on a regular basis while they can't even sneak a quickie. Personally I think adversity would do the ship some good and add legitimacy to it. Having sex with your half-dragon battle trained twin while under the same roof of your parents and not have any consequences despite of it; it's too much cake for me to personally justify. Seeing how couples deal with struggles make a relationship just as interesting and rewarding. Have a few minutes to yourselves after school? Whoops, Dad comes in to show you his molted scale collection. You want to sneak a quick kiss before you get to class? Better not let a student see and take a photo. Your libido is getting out of hand after a month without alone time? Hey, that stallion/mare from class is looking pretty cute all of a sudden. If it's so difficult to be in such a constrained relationship and show your true feelings to someone you've shared your entire life with, when they're literally right next to each other, then at some point it makes them question why they're even together in the first place, to doubt and dismiss a closeness they've had since birth. But then that just makes the little moments all the more satisfying. The moments that admonishes why they've made such a commitment to each other even if the reality is that they're better off with someone else. I don't know, I just think it's more captivating like this.

I like how much commitment this faggot has for trying to sell people on his hardcore incest fetish being okay.

>>25708988
Which one? >>25708965, >>25708925, or >>25708597?

>>25709000
Don't bring me into this, man. I'm just here to write smut.

>>25709015
Sorry. It's still incest, so I just clumped it together with the rest of the stuff.

>>25709039
It's cool. I still want to say for the record that smut is the ONLY thing I'm interested in on the subject of incest.

>>25709180
Good that you made the clarification.

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>>25702694
woo boy that took forever

>>25709374
This is too cute! She's got a tail and everything, it's great. Groot too cute.

>>25708965
>Seeing how couples deal with struggles make a relationship just as interesting and rewarding
I completely agree, hence why I rather like the idea of them running away after their parents try to keep them apart.

>>25708965
You know how some people say incestfags don't have siblings?
They're fucking idiots.

>>25709811
True, though that doesn't mean that there wouldn't experience any trouble after they've left the home. It's pretty obvious to see that they're related, so they would have to be careful out in public. Also they'd have to get their own place, manage a dwindling budget until they find monster hunting work, rough it in the wilderness at times, deal with halfie/dragon predjudice, deal with homesickness, etc. But there are some pros inspite all of this though.
>>25709892
Is this a good thing, bad thing, or...?

>>25709990
Exactly. There would be lots of challenges, but they would manage and overcome them.
Sure, there would probably be plenty of self-righteous pricks out there who would look down on them for their relationship, but they could mostly be ignored, knowing that there is no way they could possibly understand the true depth of their relationship. If they made enough of a nuisance of themselves to necessitate it, the twins could almost certainly stand their ground in battle.

I really hope I'm not the only one getting tired of the constant pushing of "sincere incest" that's been going on.

>>25710162
Nah brah, I hear ya.
That's why I have incest, Simmer, Broil, Dawn, Radiance, Timber, and Ivy all filtered.

>>25710237
Has there ever been any discussion of Timber and Ivy incest?

>>25710254
>ever
How new /are/ you?

>>25710162
>>25710237
Yeah yeah, I get it. It's been dragging on for ten hours anyway.

>>25710254
Not recently, but a while back they were fairly common for incest smut. Just smut though, no one went of on a >>25710285 approximately ten hour rant on why Timber should date and marry Ivy and how cute and normal it would be. Just smut.

>>25710285
So can we talk more about cute monster daughter like Aries and Kimmy?
or
DT and Silver spoon's satyr

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>>25710317
>Silver Spoon's satyr
Yeah, let's chat about him

>>25710317
>Aries
Kaos. It's Kaos. You misspelled the name and meant to say Eris, but it's Kaos.

>>25710332
Wait..Was it Brock who was mayor mare's satyr?

>>25710347
Oh yeah...got name mixed up

I am a terrible father

>>25710332
You think he knows Pebble thinks he'a cute?

>>25710347
Double fail

>>25710373
Mason. Who the fuck is Brock?

>>25710388
>Mason
Jeezzuss.

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>>25709374
:3

>>25710309
Got any links?

>>25710432
I don't think any of them were binned, but I know there was one where Ivy gave him a handjob in a swimsuit.

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>>25710427
>Mega Milk
Kek. I like it when satyrs are trendy. Great coloring, love the eyes.

>>25710427
Amazing/10

>>25710332
Hm...
Tell me about him /satyr/
Tell me about a day in his life

>>25710388
Nope. He's as clueless as a drawf in a barbershop.

>>25710511
Being a dwarf, running a business, shaving his beard, being stalked by Pebble

>>25710513
>Pebble kept giving him stones and minerals to analyze
>Sterling quickly analyze them with a single glance and get back to work, ignoring the blushing on pebble's monotonic face.
>One day, Pebble brought Boulder with her and Sterling habitually analyze it.
>"Oh,that's a nice rock..."
>Pebble'face became red and bothered. She literally vanished in front of Sterling's face.
>Sterling just shrug and get back to work

>>25710545
What is it with Pie family girls and stalking?

>>25710332
>>25710427
I still like the idea of Pebble and Groot forming a rock/grunge/post-rock/whatever duo and calling it either 'Stick & Stone' or 'Breaking Milkbones'.

>>25710591
Pebble showing embarrasment instead of her otherwise expressions reminds me of a doujin I once read. I forget everything about it except that it was adorable.

>>25710591
How does a dwarf get to Equestria?

>>25710755
Blame that on the anon who bang SS

>you lie in bed, feeling warm and cozied up in piles of blankets.
>something small by your feet kicks around.
>a small lump wiggles its way up and around other lumps up towards you.
>you don't open your eyes as await the inevitable.
>a head pops out from the bottom blanket, resting her chin on your chest.
>"daddy! morning!" she calls to you.
>your eyes begin to open as the other bodies begin to writhe.
>soon enough, there are four excited children, up and about, bouncing and yelling as they please.
>there are hooves kicking and curly white hair covering your vision.
please... i can't survive on two hours of sleep every night..
>your weak pleading falls on uncaring ears, and someone divebombs onto your gut.
>a whine of air escapes from your mouth, and the children scatter out of the room.
>you groan and accept your fate of rising early.

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>>25710991
i forgot to specify mompone. oops.

>everyone seems to have gathered in the kitchen, clanking of glasses and plates giving them away.
>you stumble into the room, and are met with several pairs of large eyes.
>"i'm making pancakes!" Bailey boasts, wild hair pulled into a lazy ponytail.
>you don't stop her, taking your seat at the head of the table.
>the burner turns red with heat, and your two youngest dart around, arguing about who does what.
>the smallest stomps her hoof, letting out a shriek.
>the other sneers "you better let me mix the batter Toby."
>"or else i'm gonna stuff frogs up your dress!"
>she jumps at her sister, who screams and runs, taking the mixing bowl.
>you consider intervening for just a moment.
>you let the thought pass.

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>>25711120
>toby slides under the table, cowering by your feet.
>but her face was split into a wide smile, and you didn't feel that she needed much saving.
>jack stands by you, crossing her arms.
>"she can't hide, that's cheating!" she complains, brows furrowed in annoyance seemingly with you.
>you hear bailey humming to herself as she flips a pancake.
i don't make the rules kiddo. it seems the table is safe zone.
>her braids bounce as she takes off, done with your bullshit it seems.
>shuffling from under the table.
>toby emerges victorious, snickering as she skips the mixing bowl over to bailey.
>she seems dissapointed that that particular bowl wasn't needed.
>she forgets as she sets it down to pester her brother.

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>>25711145
>stretching his hooves out on another chair, buster turns to look at his sister.
>she smiles as big as she can, and produces a small pink brush from her dress pocket.
>"knock yourself out"
>toby gets a look of determination, and sets off to play hairdresser.
>her hand jerks chunks of hair around, pulling and tugging and brushing, and buster doesn't even blink.
>you tear your eyes away from them, opting to check bailey out instead of feeling sympathy pains for your son.
>the plate of pancakes is stacked up to 21.. 22.. 23 pancakes.
>bailey shows no signs of stopping.
so, uh, how many of those are you gonna make, kiddo?
>she flips another cake, adjusting the heat down a bit.
>"dad, i know what my family eats." she states obviously, rolling her eyes.
>you ignore the teenager reaction.
i just don't think you really need twenty-thr--
>"really, i know how many are needed." she frowns, placing the 24th pancake on the stack.
>she huffs and pours the last of the batter onto the pan, creating the exact same pancake as the others.
>you open your mouth to argue more, but give in.
>fuck, you are absolutely ran by these kids.

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>>25711198
>the last pancake has been cooked, you've been sat back down, with a cup of orange juice and a plate of one pancake.
>you look at your children's plates. they're each dousing their breakfast in syrups and jams, attacking their food.
>they're almost violent in their eating, but they hardly miss a crumb.
>jack's mouth is wide open, explaining last night's dream rather loudly.
>listening eagerlly, toby smears peanut butter on a cake, tearing it in half and eating it by hand.
>her plate is probably the messiest, but 9 year olds are always messy.. right?
>bailey sits next to her, using a cloth to wipe toby's mouth clean, despite her protesting.
>jack begins cackling, elbowing buster sharply, before guzzling down her cup of water.
>milk doesn't settle very well in this family.
>prying herself away, after much struggle, toby scowls at the family.
>her lip juts out a terrible distance. great pout. excellent execution.
>she grabs the last pancake, stuffing it in her cheeks, chewing loudly glaring down her siblings.
>you let out a laugh, and you recieve the same glare.
>a telephone rings out, and you turn towards the home phone.
>bailey picks up the reciever quickly, answering politely, and her face lights up after a moment.
>"hi mom!!"

>>25708925
More when?

When was the last time Satyr smiled?

>>25712123
When her daddy came inside.

>>25711276
I've filled out all the necessary paperwork for filing an official request for more and had it notarized and undersigned by my attorney. Can I expect a response within the next 6-8 weeks?

>>25710427
If she gets an itch, does she have to use sandpaper to scratch her legs?

>>25712682
Probably.

>>25711276
>milk doesn't settle very well in this family.
Lactose intolerant kids?

>>25712973
supposed to be dumb joke that dogs tend to be lactose intolerant (at least mine)

>>25713128
Well, I'm confused as fuck because it's so early but man was it adorable.
I really didn't want more satyrs but Screw Loose is my one true Waifu originale

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>>25711276
>bailey starts chatting furiously, describing a new recipe she tried, and how she cleaned up the whole bathrooom yesterday.
>she pulled away as the other kids grabbed at her for the phone.
>jack tore it away, cutting off her sister, and took off towards the table.
>breathlesly, she yelled into the phone, holding toby back and she went on about some bugs and some kid drama.
>toby screams that its her turn, beating her small fists into her sister's side.
>jack rolls her eyes, mutters "i love you"s, and passes it along.
>the small satyr's tiny hands grasp the phone, and she practically has stars in her eyes.
>"momma, class is so amazing! Miss Cheerilee is so nice!"
>she chatters pleasently, repeating her daily life.
>"-and we played kickball, and i'm the best in the class! you shoulda seen-!!"
>She frowns into the phone, and places it into buster's hand.
>he mumbles a bit into the reciever, and leaves it at that.
>you now have the phone.
>an attendant apologizes for the abrupt cut off, but the patient was late for a therapy session.
>you sigh and thank her for the time. through the kids, you hardly get to talk to screwloose herself.
>hearing her voice just once in a while would be nice, but your children's smiling faces are worth it.
>bailey looks at the clock, and gasps.
>"toby! jack! school time!" She grabs a couple of pre-made lunch bags, passing them off to her sisters.
>they both kiss you on the cheek, and you wish them a nice day.
>bailey and buster both escort them out of the door, waving to you.
>the door shuts, and silence washes over the house.
>you let out another sigh, and get up, gathering the dishes.

finale

>>25713271
sorry for shiting that out.
i haven't written anything other than homework since middle school.
but i needed a screwloose child, but i guess one wasn't enough for me.

>>25692507
His customers i.e. mainly Snapshot keep asking if he offers happy endings. Damn it, when will they understand that he doesn't want to give handjobs to horses for a living?

>>25713271
>finale

But what about a family visit to the asylum? What about wheelchair races down the corridors and straitjacket wrestling?

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also drew a little toby to go with the story

>>25713398
maybe one day...
probably. dont hold me to it, i'm a drawfag.

>>25713478
Saved to the dropbox

>>25713367
So he'd prefer to do something else for a living and just give handjobs to horses for free?

>>25713539
Well when you put it like that...

>>25713478
Does she like doggy style?

>>25713628
she's nine yeah probably

>>25713478
Those thighs don't lie/10

How about a family picture?

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>>25713680
might line this later, but here is a handy guide!
starting with anon, going clockwise, there is:
buster (m) second oldest, jack (f) third oldest, toby (f) youngest and bailey (f) oldest

>>25713763
You are a great asset to this thread
Not fond of namefagging?

>>25713783
never really tried it i guess?
i've posted around here and the drawthread, but meh
if one comes to me i'll start

>>25713478
>>25713763

Damn these are cute. There's something about white(ish) hair that always looks appealing to me.

>>25710427
I wonder if her pussy is made of wood.

>>25713763
>>25713478
These are great additions to the satyr thread and you perfectly introduced them. Made a nice cute story to grt their personalities, and you even made two drawings showing them. GG Probs.
>>25714230
Probably

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>>25708925
>tfw AnalplugAnon abandoned us

>>25714230
http://imgur.com/zAOcUYe
the fic describes felt and soft magic?

>>25714377
unf

>>25714230
And her clit is an acorn.

>>25714377
Calling it. Groot for best waifu. Would bellyrub/10

Which satyr would be the best to go down on?

>>25713271
>>25713478
>>25713763
I am loving this.

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>>25714965
Darcy, because I want to feel those powerful thighs wrapped around my head.

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>>25715152
Uncle Anon's preferred method of greeting his beloved niece is to sneak up behind her and give her the mother of all wedgies, then when she spins around with eyes burning with the fury of an angry god, laughing and giving her the souvenirs he picked up for her on his travels. It's not even sexual, he's just... quirky.

What other families have strange traditions?

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>>25715292
If someone's expected to marry into the Pie family, they have to partake in the eating of the Family Torta.

>>25715429
Is that a euphemism? I can't even tell anymore.

>>25715465
No, each of the Pies literally take one slice of the wrap and eat it with the engaged. They get three. If they can finish their slices in one sitting, then they officially become apart of the family.

We now return you to your regularly scheduled cuddlefest.

>>25715794

Which Satyr is the biggest cuddleslut?

>>25715825
>Misty
>Groot
>Pebble
>Ace
>Dawn

>>25715838

So who would be in Dawn's cuddle harem?

>>25716782
>harem
Let's start with ____no____

>>25716870
Good start

>>25716870

I don't mean it in a sexual way. She just likes to cuddle a lot and has a few guys she just likes to hug.

>>25716973
I think it's cute, so I'm tossing in Lil Mac because it's like hugging a teddy bear.

>>25716782
No one because interacting with those below your station is difficult

Would satyrs get foot envy?

>>25717716
Not those have feet or paws. They could wear shoes, albeit big ones.

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>The night air cracks and splits with thunder. You are awoken from your slumber by a deep dread that encompasses you like a total darkness.
>A presence stirs outside these walls. Its aura suffocates you even in the security of your own walls.
>In an attempt to hide you curl up with sheets wrapped around you, feeling smaller and smaller as the winds pick up.
>Three knocks. Three heavy, jangling knocks assault your door. It pales your skin, racks you with shutters, and congeals the breath inside your throat.
>You dare not open that door, to invite that foreign plague inside your house and wish your utter decimation.
>But it was pointless. In an instant a mighty shockwave spreads throughout the house, leaving you hurled from the mattress and the door in splinters.
>Once you come to, your eyes gaze upon towering, dazzling figures, each awesome and horrifying in their own domain.
"The gods of the thread," you whisper.
>Then a voice penetrates the reccesses of your quaking soul, leaving you an ultimatum from beings too mighty to comprehend.
>'Bow. Or Perish.'
>Turned away from their spectacular essence, you nod fervently, fearing the consequences of rejection.

>To which do you pledge your allegiance?

>The God of the Hearth, eldest of them all and has stood with the thread since its dawn, he holds the traditions of family life as the highests tenets.

>The Goddess of the Bower, with her many insatiable followers, welcomes those who seek pleasure and love unrestrained from convention, as long as she doesn't find it too queer for her quarters.

>The Goddess of the Fields, steward of the expansive lands ripe with adventures, mysteries, dangers, and wonders.

>The God of the Amphitheatre, full with the comedies and tradgedies of life, he bares his story to the audience, no matter how grand or mediocre the tales may be.

>The Goddess of the Dais, who ceaselessly and vainly chews on her words of disdain, spending her days bitterly lamenting on what was and what could be.

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Aeon is the daughter of the pony inventor Time Turner. Inheriting her father's genius and ingenuity has often gotten her into trouble when combined with her curiosity. Her past time involves making scientific gizmos and inquiring about the world around her. She csn often times be quite impulsive and throw herself into situations she assures that she's in control of, only to have it turn out significantly different as expected.

Her life as an intellectual often makes her feel as if other satyrs can't understand her or truly grasp the extent of her feelings. Though she swears to people that she's had a slew of adventures in other worlds, most of them look at her as if she were crazy.

However, she finds comfort in telling fellow terrestrial adventurer Atlas, daughter of the renowned Daring Do, who always has time to lend an ear. Their friendship stems from their passion for discovering the world (or worlds) around them. Like Aeon, Atlas tends to rush head first to the call of the wild, hoping to uncover hidden cultures, artifacts, secrets, and treasures in her expeditions. The duo often trade stories and mementos of each journey, leaving the both of them with tons of junk from the other. Hopefully the two of them would have adventures with each other, but only time can tell with that.

Aeon's aspires to become as good as an inventor like her dad Time Turner, and wants to use her inventions for the betterment of ponykind and beyond.

>>25717716
Think on this for a second, what would satyrs envy of their human or pony neighbors.

In this one im writing on satyrs are referred to as humans, for simply walking upright like them. The only times referred to as a "satyr" is by Twilight and her human husband. The main satyr that the narrative follows struggles with this at first, but is able to see past it with help of her two new friends.

>>25719597
But minotaurs and diamond dogs walk upright too and get referred to as their individual species.

>>25719487
She seems interesting, I'd like to see more of her and her many fun adventures.

>>25719487
>"Trust me, Doc. Everything's gonna be just fine!"
>Warp!

"What do you mean 'I accidentally brought back an army of daleks and their pet T-Rex?!"

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>>25719691
I think there was a green of her once, but I can't remember. It'd be great if we could have her adventures more akin to Rick & Morty or Firefly than Doctor Who.

>>25719756
So we either get
>"Man this planet is so barren LOOK A CITY! Land there, maybe we can make some money."

Or

"A-Aeon. Urrrrp. Come with me, we gotta, gotta go find the flying spaghetti m-monster. C'mon, I just built a catapwaaaah!lting net out of straw and toothpicks."

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>>25719756
Im ok with Rick and Morty more so since I've never even see Doctor Literally Who.

and besides, comedy is more my thing anyway. I;ll see if I can get something done maybe. But my will to write has been like pic related lately

>>25719636
Very true.

In place of where the main satyr lives, the only bipedal creatures walking about have been Anon and Spike. Other bipedal walkers, havent left a big enough impact like how Anon has.

>>25719796
>>25719826
Or maybe
>Ooo...I honestly didn't expect the alien chickens to go on a rampage after I added the growth serum to their feed. But, in retrospect, it's kinda your fault for letting me try to solve your hunger crisis.
>>25719840
Still don't see how that has to do with satyrs being called humans.

>>25719877
Stop being nitpicky, it's their story.

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>>25704485
I still think drakes get a hemipenis or a single penis by chance. Muddle has a hemipenis and tells his brother it's because he was so cool and his dick was so huge in a past life, he gets rewarded by keeping it in this life.

>>25720063
Ah like most of the genetics being a toss of the dice. I see, very interesting. Mhmm... Soo, you think Gargle could fit two dicks in his mouth?

>>25720063
There needs to be a followup pic of someone in the family reading his diary entry and gagging

>>25720075
>the unhinging jaws of life
You've got me interested, and I hate lewds

>>25720086
I'm gonna be honest, back when trap discussion was as frequent as incest is now, I wanted people to capitalize on Gargle. Ever since MT gave the thumbs up... So, a small snippet of how I imagine it going.

>Panting softly, voice quivering, you slide your hips slowly back and forth.
>Gargle licks over your double dong slowly, sucking as he looks up to you.
>You need to thank Glimmer for that potion and find a way to repay Garble's wife for birthing this perfect little cock sucker.
>The rumors of his jaw being wide enough for two dicks were SO under-exaggerated.
>After drinking your little enhancer, Gargle didn't even flinch.
>The drake dropped to his knees, gave you some slithery tongue service, and surprised you by fitting both cocks in at once.
>No struggle, no discomfort.
>He took it like a well practiced slut and now you're getting over double the pleasure.
>Looking down at the cheek stuffed drake, he redoubles his efforts, lips sliding up and down your shafts.
>"*Guuhk, glaahk. Shhhhhlk. Guk guk guk.*"
>Letting off a whimpered moan, you can feel yourself getting close.

>Gargle swings his feet as he sits on the couch
>Garble sits emotionless next to him
>He thumbs through the paper, only recalling dragon events
>Momma Anon gives them both sandwiches, Gargle ham and Garble gems
>The dragon father eyes him
>"Do you think you'll ever grow up to be as cool as your little sister?"
>He gives the tot in the stroller beside him a crumb of emerald, which she gladly sucks on
>The young boy whimpers and walks away to eat his sandwich in peace
>Momma Anon puts her hands on her hips, scowling at the father
>Gargle doesn't even lift an eyebrow, speaking with a full mouth
>"What?"

>>25720198
Is this Simmer going back for seconds? Or is this someone else being devious?

>>25720198
>Mouth like a snake, minus the venom and sharp teeth
A safe snake bj? ... This shoukd not induce why boners

>>25720233
I'm gonna guess it's either an Anon or random satyr since he needs a potion for double prnis action.

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>>25720198
ah cmon, Gargle is an innocent little qt, not meant for this life of anus play and cum swallowing. Spare him Anon, spare himm thread. There are pletny of otheer sexy drakes to fulfil your trap fetish. Like Muddle

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>>25720276
Honestly, I've been dreaming about the return of sexy Gargle
Don't ruin this for me

>>25720297
You too? I was disappointed he came in around the tail end of the trap high. So much lewd potential. Plus, he models for Snapshot... Let that sink in

>>25720355
I thought Muddle modeled for Snap?

>>25720377
Close https://desustorage.org/mlp/thread/23421529/#q23441890 he tried to, but Muddle refused. Th-That's gay, after all.