Reversed Gender Roles Horseland, something something snuggle pile.

boop

>>25509602
>>25510151
>"Oh, hey! Y-you made it!"
>You turn and look in the direction of that outburst
>I mean, you just stepped into the coffeeshop and-
>And there's Chief Cuddle Jane "The" Wings Ponice in a booth, very enthusiastically waving at you
>You can't help but chuckle and wave back
>"I-I saved us a booth!"
"Oh, us? But I just stopped by the station on my way here to let the station know I have some hot tips on Jane the Cuddler-"
>At this, the coffeeshop's background chatter lowers significantly
>Suddenly sad eyes everywhere
>ugh that's right cuddles are srs bsns in horseworld
>"Y-YES. AND THE PONICE ARE HERE TO HELP." Cuddle Wings says far too loudly
>You take off your coat, sliding into the booth
"Yes, well - I was curious, how did you know I was going to be here? The station said you've been out on patrol all day..."
>"Wh-ah, uh, I-i'ts... uh, gut ponice training! I knew I had to stake out this coffee shop!"
>You 'ah' softly, nodding
"Well, it's good that you're such a paragon of virtue, dedicated to the people of Equestria!"
>She nods vigorously, grinning. "Y-yes! That's me, the heroi-"
>"Here's number 7, chief! Is this the guest you were talking about this morning?!"
>*tak*
>The waitress places down a large, frothy mug infront of The Chief "Cuddler" Cuddle Jane Wings Ponice
>It looks like... hot cocoa with peppermint sprinkles and whipped cream
>The mug is decorated with sparkly hearts and snowflakes and generally adorable things
"...the heroine?"
>Her cheeks are bright red as she grabs the festive mug
>"y-yes..." she squeaks
>You smile at the waitress as she pulls out a pad and pencil
"Just coffee for me, black."
>"Double caramel mochiattino, light ice, hot but simmered, 4 pumps of chai with cocoa sprinkles and half cream, got it-"
"No no I mean, just coffee. black."
>She tilts her head. "...D-double chocolate Mochiattino...?"
"No, just black."
>She turns to Ponice Jane "The Cuddler" Wings Cuddle. "Is that some new colt acronym for a drink?"

frosty your sweetie is fucking adorable

>Our hero needs a job.
>Applies as a guard for a big company.
>Boss pone thinks its a good ideas because noone would attack a colt.
>Anon gets the job.
>Anon does fuck all for a few months as nobody is mean in ponland.
>Sneakpone decides to break into ponecorp and steal important files.
>Sneakpone takes out half of guard force
>Thats 2 guards.
>Oh shit; Anon.
>Sneakpone wouldnt hit a colt!
>Sneakpone has idea.
[Spoiler]Tactical Snuggling[/Spoiler]
>Anon is tackled and left [Spoiler]Warm and Cosy[/Spoiler] on the ground.
>Anon has to sex Bosspone again so he doesn't lose his job.

Isn't it great to be on the internet?

>>25518850
Damn, knew I messed up the spoilers.

>>25518699
>She shrugs. "I unno, but just... get him what's popular - on me, of course."
>"Of course, ma'am." The waitress smiles at you as she walks away
>*siiiiiiiiiiiip*
>The Ponice Wings Jane Cuddler Cuddle takes a careful drag of her drink and then sets it down on the table, frothy mustache staying on her muzzle
>"So, you said you had a tip on this vermin?" she says, oblivious to her amazing new handlebar mustache
>....fucking horsetopia
"Ah, well. Just that she seems to be targeting me."
>A gasp
>"The fiend!"
"Y-yeah... uh, roundabout 6 or 7, when I get off of my late shift, she meets me about a block from work-"
>"The monster! Th-that's loitering!"
>She pounds her hoofsies against the table for dramatic effect, but the table's apparently made of actual sturdy material
>so they kinda, uh. bounce a bit once they connect
"Well. We talk about our days for about 30 or so minutes, then she starts to cuddle me once I get to my home-"
>Another gasp
>"The sn-s, the soundre-"
"scoundrel"
>"The scoundrel!" she finishes, scrunching her muzzle so hard you're actually kinda impressed
>her face is damn near flat with how hard the scrunchinging is happening
>Oh
"Oh, uh, sorry - you've got a little something-"
>You lick your thumb and lean forward
>"O-oh, you wonderful colt, thinking of others even when y-you're being d-defiled by that despicable, h-horrible, n-naughty-"
>You gently wipe off a sole stubborn sideburn on the side of her head as she continues apparently getting aroused by this
>Roleplay? eh, could be worse
>*tak*
>a giant frothy silly-cup sits infront of you, an abomination and affront to all things caffeinated
>"Here's your Caramel-Orange-Fruitcake-Festive-Edemame-Eucalyptus-" *inhale* "Blueberry-Lime-Actiotino with Cookie-Krumbles(tm) on top! Enjoy!"
>You violently have a seizure

>>25518850
>>25518860

close. Ctrl+s makes spoilers. Just highlight the text you want spoilered and make it happen.

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>>25519339
>Another gasp
>>"The sn-s, the soundre-"
>"scoundrel"
>>"The scoundrel!" she finishes, scrunching her muzzle so hard you're actually kinda impressed

>>25519339
I actually squeaked like a little girl when I saw this update.

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>>25519748
>squeaked like a little girl
UNF
N
F

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>>25519339
>Here's your Caramel-Orange-Fruitcake-Festive-Edemame-Eucalyptus-" *inhale* "Blueberry-Lime-Actiotino with Cookie-Krumbles(tm) on top! Enjoy!"
I've seen some shit, man.

>>25518850
I need more deets, does Anon sex sneakpone? Is bosspone paying a professional sneakpone to steal files to get "don't fire me sex"?

>>25518728
Oh hey thanks Anon, I'm glad you and that other Anon in the last thread liked it.

>>25521228
Dude, that shit is amazing. Keep writing that one as long as you like, friendo.

>>25521228
It's amazing. All you need is Bloom tying to out-alpha Sweetie and a VERY jealous and confused Scoot to make this perfect

>>25521475
i need it

>>25521228
Do more please.

>>25518562
I love you Twilight Sparkle.

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>>25521743

page 7 bump

>>25519339
Cuddle Wings lives!

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>PWF
>PONY WRESTLING FEDERATION
>DIVAS DIVISION
>BUCK YEAH

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>Day 8 months in Equestria
>You are, of course, Anon.
>The shock of being torn away from your family, as well as any kind of life you may have lived has just about worn off.
>You know you're never going home, and you've accepted that.
>You had to.
>So, you've more-or-less moved on with your life.
>Got a job at a coffee shop and started paying rent to Twilight.
>She said that she was in your debt for stealing you away from everything you've ever accomplished or ever WILL accomplish, but you insisted.
>You're pretty sure she just sneaks the bits into your pockets and shit one-at-a-time, so that you don't notice.
>Anyway, your job is pretty standard.
>Turns out that the process of making coffee is just about identical to how it's made back home.
>Water temperature, pressure, bean roasts, whatever.
>Coffee is coffee. Don't matter none if it comes from the ground or from Twilight's enormous futa-dick.
>Your job as a barista (baristbro?) really lets you learn about ponies and their day-to-day lives.
>They're boring as shit.
>That's what you've learned.
>One new thing you've learned since you started working at the Rise and Grind: "Herds".
>Apparently they're a thing.
>You're not really sure why. When you think about it, you've never really seen too many stallions around town.
>Maybe there's a shortage?
>Or maybe they're all just assholes.
>Whatever. You'll talk to Twilight later.

>>25521228
Wait, which one was that?

>>25524055
Coffee wells confirmed.

>Be Anon, prospector.
>You've been riding around on your pony randomly hitting the ground with a pickaxe for about a week now.
>And it's finally paid off.
>There's a black-brown liquid slowly filling the bottom of the hole you just struck.
>You kneel down and take a sniff to be sure.
>Yep, that's coffee alright.
>Brown Gold, Turkish Tea, the lifeblood of civilization.
>Now you can finally move out of that hick town to a real city.
>No more Rarity eating your clothes.
>No more fluttershy destroying your veggie patch.
>Yep, it's the Canterlot life for you now.

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>>25524055
>"Morning, Anon. Can you serve me up something hot and tall?"
>That's another thing you've noticed about ponies: the mares are way more flirty than the women back home.
>It's usually the female the approaches the male; the female who pays for the male's drink; the female who call other females "filly foolers"
>You guess that's horse-word for "faggot"?
"Sure thing, miss Rose. Black, as usual?"
>"Anon, please. You see me almost every day; just call me Rosie."
>You've worked here with these machines long enough that you don't really have to pay attention to what you're doing.
>Instead of zoning out, you decide to listen in on any interesting conversations nearby.
>>"--and he's not returning ANY of my letters. I can't figure out what I did wro--"
>>"--bring the cider, you bring the Hayritos, Cuddle Wings. And don't forg--"
>>"--but he smelled like the Devil, oh my GOD it was the most disGUSTING smell you have EVER smelled, Daring, and--"
HISSSSSS
>OW FUCK JESUS
>You yelp loudly and jump back away from the loudly-hissing espresso machine, which is now enveloped in a cloud of steam.
>Ooooooohhh fuck YOU that hurt.
>You look down at your arm, and recoil at the sight.
>Almost the entire underside of your forearm is painted an angry red, and you can see blisters forming before your eyes.
>Then the pain hits.
>You've been burned before, but not this badly, and never across such a huge area of skin.
>You try your best not to cry, but it feels like somebody is holding a hot cast-iron skillet to your arm.
>One of the mares runs up to you.
>"Anon! Are you okay?!"
>Oh hey, it's Rosie.
>Hi Rosie.

>>25524229
What do you Appaloosa has going for it? Their coffee wells provide the town with their only source of income.

>No more Rarity eating your clothes.
Is she secretly a goat, or is this how she saves money on food?

>>25524234
more?

>>25524253
Rarity's a massive salt whore. She eats Anon's dirty clothes for the dried sweat.

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>>25524234
>Before you manage to hiss out a response, Rose gets a closer look at your arm, and gasps.
>"Somepony get the manager! Oh gosh, Anon, what can I do?"
>You manage to hiss a response through the pain.
"D-don't know, Rosie."
>Aaaand here the tears come.
>Right in front of everypony.
>You choke back a sob and watch as more and more ponies gather around you.
>You guess burns on exposed skin look different than burns under fur.
>You hold R2 to listen, and take ear-gander and what the mob of concerned pones have to say.
>>"--lestia, he should have never been allowed to work with that machine--"
>>"--need to go outside. I can't stomach seeing an injured colt--"
>>"--le Wings, you're the chief of ponice. Can't you DO somethi--"
>"Anon!"
>And it looks like your manager has arrived on scene.
>"Oh Celestia, that looks bad. Anon, sweetie, what happened to you?"
>Steam Bean trots up to you and grabs your arm with his magic to get a better look at your arm.
>Magic doesn't really work on you, and all it does is make your burn sting like a MOTHERFUCKER.
"Ow ow ow oW OW LET GO STEAM BEAN"
SB:"Sorry! Sorry! Listen, Anon, don't you worry, okay? I've contacted your herd mare, and she'll be here to collect you any minute now."
>Herd mare? Does he mean Twilight?
>With a poof of magic, your favourite purple unicorn appears in front of you.
>Oh hey, it's Twilight.
Hi Twilight.

>>25524343
That's all for tonight. It's late/early and I should probably be awake before noon. More tomorrow, though.

>>25524234
>>Oh hey, it's Rosie.
>>Hi Rosie.
kek

>>25524310
naw, this is just the RGRE-pony equivalent of a panty-raid.

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ANALPLUG, WHERE'S YOUR PASTEBIN

WHY AREN'T YOU IN THE DOCSARCHIVE

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>>25524469
I DON'T KNOW

SHOULD I BE IN THERE

>>25519810
Told tell me you find the idea of anons acting like cute, little girls sexy. Because I do, too.

>>25524601
*Don't tell me
fuck

>>25524477
YES YOU SHOULD

FAGGOT

Please link it.

>>25519339
>>25524343
>You are anon
>On a coffee date with Cuddle Cuddler Ponice Jane the Chief Wings
>You're also making coffee
>Apparently it's a thing they let you do? Whatever
>You decide in the spirit of #yoloswagtreehuggero'clock to see what roiling steam does to a forearm
>Oh hey it burns like fuck
>Ponicuddler Wief thane Cuddle stands triumphantly ontop of a table near you
>"Thiefses! Tricksy and False! Sad-face stickers and empty juiceboxes! Jane the Cuddler, I, Ponice Chief Cuddle Wings, will find you and make you pay for this taf-, tapest-"
>Her face twists like she's got some lettuce stuck between her teeth
"Rrggghhhh travesty-"
>"-travesty!" she finishes strong
>The pones applaud by stomping on the ground
>*biff* *boop* *tap* *paf* *pompf* *taf*
>marshmellow-on-floor is uh... very gentle
>today was a "WHY IS THERE NO BURN WARD" kinda day

>>25523558
>two of the biggest small horses in equestria
>slapfight each other, take no bumps
>ass-based offense
>crowd of mares going wild except for sjw's
>"why can't they let these stallions have real matches"

Waiting for analplug's filly green

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>>25524601
>A loli Femnon will never end up in Equestria with Anon.
>The populace will never insist that Anon adds her to his harem.
>They will never respond to his claims of her age with "So?".
>They will never offer him some fillies to help ease him into the idea.

>>25524904
Don't you make fun of my waifu

>>25524710
HOW DO I GOOGLE DOC

IM 12 AND WHAT IS THIS

>>25524935
>>"why can't they let these stallions have real matches"
>Anon decides to shut up the annoying shouty ponies
>By giving them exactly what they asked for
>Oiled up stallion wrestlers are not playing with matches in the middle of their pool of oil
>They end up crispy
>Shouty ponies are beaten up and driven out of town by an angry mob
>Anon gets off scot-free because "he was just doing what the mares told him to do"
>With wrestlers in the burn ward, Anon is now significantly more desirable
>Extra-horny mares give Anon better discounts when he's shopping
>Massive profits for his sex-toy shop
>No more protesters outside his house shouting angrily about him being oppressed
>JustAsPlanned.png

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>>25525098
Ask and ye shall receive. (gonna ease it up on the porn while I'm here. Don't want to attract those filthy half-breed satyrs to the thread.)
This is gonna be a long one.
That's what she said.

>Day Good Father in Equestria
>You are Anon and it is parent/teacher night.
>Ponywaifu couldn't make it, which means that it was just you and your little filly, Midnight Magic.
>"Thank you for making time to meet me, Mister Anonymous."
"It was no trouble at all, Miss Cheerilee. I'm looking forward to seeing how my daughter is doing in class."
>You and your little filly take a seat on two chairs that have been plopped down in front of the teacher's desk.
>Midnight's school teacher breaks down your daughter's academic performance as well as her interactions with other students, and apparently she's doing very well.
>You look down at your daughter and she's beaming.
>You know what?
>You think she deserves a reward.
>You make sure to keep an ear open and to pay attention to what Cheerilee is saying. Regardless of what exactly you're about to do next, you take your role as a father seriously.
>You make sure that you have Midnight's attention as you unzip your fly and slooowwly reach in to fish out your hardening cock.
>Your penis bobs rhythmically in time with your heart beat as you reach over to pick your little filly up by the armpits.
>Cheerilee offers you a kind smile when you set your daughter on your lap, her crotch firmly pressed up against your manhood.
>>"O-ooh, daddy?"
>You begin to grind against your daughter.
"So, miss Cheerilee, is Midnight having any troubles making friends?"

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>>25526067
>"Not at all, Anonymous. Your daughter here easily reaches out to others, and makes an effort to include her classmates in both school activities and leisure time."
>Your daughter moans as she rolls her hips, sliding her wet sex over the length of your shaft.
"Well, I'm happy to hear that. My wife and I have always made sure t-to instil some very important fr-friendship ideals."
>Cheerilee glances down to where your panting daughter is covering your shaft with her juices, and smiles.
>"So I can see. Would I be right to assume that you've already talked to your daughter about sex?"
>You lift your daughter up and sloooowwly skewer her on your meatcock.
>The spongey head of your penis reaches her cervix before you manage to hilt in her.
>Your daughter gives a loud and VERY lewd moan as she fidgets in your grasp.
>>"Mmmmm~"
>The two of you are squirming in your seat, doing some combination of rolling your hips and thrusting your way into her.
"Yuh-yes, m-miss Cheerilee. Love St-strudel was against it at first, b-but when push c-cuuuuhms to shove, I think we b-both know who gets their way."
>Cheerilee chuckles politely.
>"If papa ain't happy, ain't NOPONY happy."
>The two of you share a laugh, though yours sounds a bit strained.
>(It's because you're busy fucking your daughter.)
>The fabric of your pants is soaked right now.
>Gonna have to get Rarity to replace them.
>She always insists on replacing them rather than cleaning them.
>You don't know what she does with your pants once they're hers.
>She probably eats them.

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>>25526076
"So, how is Midnight d-doing in math?"
>The teacher's face falls, and you begin to slow your thrusts, and your daughter whines pitifully at the lack of stimulation.
>>"B-but... Daddy?"
>"I'm afraid she isn't doing very well in that subject, Anonymous. She just doesn't seem to have the head for numbers."
"Oh dear. Is there anything I can do to help? Any tutoring textbooks you might recommend?"
>Cheerilee's face lights up again at your willingness to help improve your daughter's grades. You can tell she takes the well-being of her students seriously.
>"Well... I know of a few books you can check out from Golden Oaks Library."
"Good to hear, Could you write the titles down for me?"
>While the teacher gets to work, you lean in to your daughter and say..."
"hey little mama lemme whisper in your ear"
"Think I can help you with your math, Midnight? Hmm?"
>Your breath is hot and wet in her ear. Your daughter shivers in your lap and gasps.
>>"Yes, daddy."
"Will my big filly do better in class?"
>You bounce her gently in your lap, and she squeaks with each thrust.
>>"Y-yes, daddy."
>You nibble on the tip of her ear.
"Promise to try harder? For me and mommy?"
>You've made your way up to a steady bounce.
>>"Yes, daddy!"
>Wet, meaty slaps echo though the small school house, and the smell of sex makes your head spin.
>Both you and your daughter are close now.
>So close.
>Cheerilee is using her mad oral skills to write a list of books for you, and doesn't seem to care about how thoroughly you're fucking your tiny horse-child.

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>>25526084
"Y-yes what, Minny?"
>She loves it when you tease her.
>>"Yes, I praaaaawwwmise, daddy! Please, please harder!"
"You'll put more effort into your classes?"
>By now she's a sweaty, panting mess.
>>"Yes, daddy! Yes, yes yes!"
>You lean forward and catch her lips in your mouth. Her breath is hot and moist, and her tongue is eager to play.
>You both reach your climax there and then.
>Midnight's words are muffled in your mouth as you explode inside of her.
>There's a big puddle of marecum underneath your chair, and you wonder how Miss Cheerilee is going to get the stench out before tomorrow's morning class.
>"Here you are, Anonymous. Thanks again for coming by, and tell Love Strudel that next week's hoofball game is going to be at my place."
>Exhausted and out of breath, you reach over with noodle arms and weakly grab the paper being presented to you, nearly dropping it into the sticky liquids pooling around your feet.
>You gasp what could pass as a 'goodbye' before removing your daughter from your cock.
>Semen rushes from her pink pony pussy like a small river. You really filled her up.
>You carry your boneless daughter out of the schoolhouse and begin the long walk home.

That's the end of that. Back to horribly burned Anon.
something something teat-twisting

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>>25526067
>filthy half-breed satyrs
Joke's on you. When your is the type of person who calls you an "abomination" endearingly, you probably don't mind being called that either.
Especially when being fucked.
Double especially not when being fucked by said father.

>>25525762
Seriously, I have never used Google Doc before and that grid format is scaring me.

>>25525762
>>25526112
Anyone can edit the shared Google Document, even Anonymously. just right click the table to add a new row and insert your info on the table.

>>25526231
>Thanks, Anon. Google Doc (and pastebin) updated.

>>25526281
Don't know why I green-texted that.

>>25526092
I liked it, and I hope you'll write more incest soon.

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>>25524469
WE HAVE A DOCSARCHIVE?

QUICKLY, FOR POSTERITY, POST IT!

MY OLD THREAD LINKS ARE BROKEN SINCE ARCHIVE.MOE'S IMPLOSION.

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>>25526336
uuuuuu....
that way? >>25518562

prompt:
-gender roles were more like modern earth times before luna was banished
-luna thinks the new colts suck shit
-anon is sick to fucking death with all the mares coddling him and treating him like a child
-anon and luna hook up; treat each other like equals
-public watches how luna doesnt treat anon like the delicate flower he is
-they think the relationship is abusive
-tensions rise in canterlot

>>25526350
The ponies can't believe a PRINCESS is making a colt work to support them. His co-workers are always trying to get him to break up with her or find a better mare.
Celestia is slightly against them being together for a few reasons.
1. It's making Luna's re-acclimatization to modern society harder.
2. It's making Anons acclimatization to pony society harder.
3. She sort of has a crush on Anon.
4. It will finally let her get to sleep on time, given how loud they are in bed in the room next to her.

>>25526336
I meant the Google Doc with Pastebins.

If you want a a Thread archive you should be using DesuStorage by now.

>>25526447
Magical horse princess orgies, is there anything they don't solve?

>>25526447
"Anon, listen, can I talk to you for a second?"
>"Sure thing, Celly. What's up?"
>Oh lord, he looks so happy. So ignorant. You almost don't want to shatter his naive, coltish view of the world.
"It's about your job."
>Anon looks slightly concerned.
>"My job? Oh jeez, did I do something wrong? You know I'm still trying to acclimatize to Equestria."
>Look at how scared he is. Does he think I'm going to punish him for making some kind of mistake. What was your sister DOING to this poor colt?!
"Oh, no! No, Anonymous, not at all. You're doing just fine, sweetheart."
>Aww, look at the way his tiny nose scrunches when you call him that.
>He wants to be the big, independent stallion.
"It's just... you know you don't HAVE to work, right? I mean, my sister is courting you; the two of you won't exactly be hurting for funds."
>"Are you... trying to tell me something? Does it look bad for the royal family if a suitor has a job?"

>>25526575
>What?
>He works himself to the bone five days a week!
>His tight, human tush has to get sore sitting on that pony-chair all day.
>His dexterous hand must cramp SO BADLY from all the notes he has to take!
>All those coffee runs for the higher-ups....
>You shudder at the thought of poor, innocent Anon spilling scalding-hot coffee on his delicate spider-hooves.
>Why doesn't Luna put a stop to this?
>WHY
>As much as you love your sister, you can't just put up with her unacceptable behaviour for much longer.
"Anon, don't worry about the royal family. A sweet colt like you can only IMPROVE our image."
>You nuzzle him (p-platonically, of course!) and try to calm his frayed nerves.
>How can you watch over him and make sure nothing bad happens if he's away from you and your sister for most of the day?
>.....
>Well.... work DOES get him out of the castle and away from your terrible sister...
>Gives him time to lick his wounds and maybe cry in the bathroom.
"I won't keep you any longer, Anon. Forget this conversation even happened."
>You use your magic to scoot him along (and to cop a feel at his AMAZING backside) before he has a chance to say anything.

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>>25526578
>>25526575
How can Celestia be as RGR as modern day born ponies when she is much older than Luna herself?

>>25526672
boiled like a frog

>>25526672
Maybe she's part of the reason behind modern RGR pony society?

>>25526672
She changed with the world. Luna is getting a thousand years of change at once.

>>25526738
>>25526708

Why though?

>>25526801
I'm not sure what you're asking for.

>>25526801
A disease perhaps. One that came from common stallion work at the time, and led to genetic changes inhibiting stallion births(something that attacks y chromosones/y sperms). Because of this, stallions were protected more, and eventually became the house colts they are today.
The low male birth rate is a result of damaged genetics being passed down unknowingly, to the point where there were near none unaffected stallions.
Larger families/clans in current days are decendants of more pure stallions, and have higher male birth rates, though they're still far out balanced by female birth rates.

>>25526801
>To say things were difficult after Luna's banishment would be a grave understatement
>You were constantly drained from having to raise both the sun and moon
>Your kingdom was beginning to reflect you more and more
>There so many males were dispatched to face against the nightmares that monster created
>So very few of them returned, even fewer returned unharmed
>The Diamond Dogs were placing pressure on the mountains of Equestria
>The Gryphons claim the spread of their cloudy cities is a tidal situation brought about by your moon raising
>The minotaurs at least were more direct in their interest in your open plains
>Starswirl, your most trusted advisor suggested something... extreme
>Through the use of his magic mirror you were able to bring forth a creature from another world
>Human, that was his race, and Anonymous was his name
>The tenacity, resourcefulness, and fervor which is innate to his kind seemed like the last hope Equestria had to rely on
>Anonymous agreed to do his best for the sake of all Ponykind
>Many hard months passed, and with the help of the human Equestria had found itself gaining headway
>The remaining few stallions who could still fight formed alongside him an elite squadron
>Those who could not were cared for by the mares and young who also contributed to the workforce in the absence of their husbands
>Some were so wounded that it took several mares working in unison to be able to properly support the veteran
>You wished there had been another way, but caught between a rock and a hard place Equestria had to adapt or fall
>In the following years your kingdom had begun to see stability again
>With Anonymous commanding an ever stronger army, stallions forged in blood and battle, mares who fear no threat, Equestria was reclaiming that which it had once lost
>The homefront was returning to the state it once was, a prosperous and equal land

>>25526801
Good question. People don't change that much over time; The amount of 50's style racists in our society proves it.

>>25527020
>That is, until your hoof had to be forced
>The human, his desires had no limit, your guards paled in comparison to even the newest recruits of his elites
>Word began to spread throughout your land
>More and more of the young, who had seen their homes ravaged by the neighboring lands began to fall in line with the human's thinking
>He had begun perusing land beyond that which was once yours
>You commanded him to stop, informed him that his efforts had been monumental in salvaging your ponies, but there was need no longer for 'reclaimation'
>Words that started as mumbles became whispers, then talks, then speeches, and finally action
>Equestria was beginning to split, this land of harmony you had sought to create with your sister was on the brink of collapse
>You did what was necessary to salvage your kingdom, to ensure your vision for the world could still be reached
>It was not easy, you had learned many things in that battle
>The difference between man and mare
>The potential stallions can reach if they are pushed to their limits
>And it was in that battle you feared what could happen should they reach this peak again
>The mirror was as shattered as your body, but you survived, as did Equestria
>Following that was a monumental effort to shift things in the direction they were headed during the first crisis
>Seeing you on the battlefield reignited your ponies' faith in your strength, they followed along despite there being no crisis anymore
>The mares once again spearheaded the workforce, elites who were willing to conform were made generals kept very firmly under your hoof
>And Equestria once again was on the path to true harmony, it was not perfect, you feared as a result of the human that equality may never be truly reached again
>To allow the stallions to reach their former glory, it is too much power for any one to lead

Eh, I dunno. I tried.

>>25524098
The Sweetie Belle short I posted right at the end of the last thread.

>>25527026
>50's style racists
I'm actually starting to wonder how much of the 50's style racism is just smear campaign revisionist history.

Television shows, movies, and even text to a lesser extent, can only show you so much.

Even if you look at old politicians, you've got the horseshoe theory to contend with. If you have a 2 party system, then the parties will end up representing as extreme a version of their ideologies as possible.

>>25527037
>Celestia is scared that treating stallions as equals will eventually make them warmongers
Could work.

>>25527037
>>25527177
I liked it. Evolutionary overspecialization combined with circumstances that forces a population to actually live up to a good fraction of it's potential can be a scary thing.

The "Parkour Dog" gif I found was too big, and the youtube videos I found were surprisingly shit, so just imagine a dog using it's running and low center of gravity to do crazy parkour stuff like running up walls, along fences, and making surprising jumps.

>>25527020
>>25527037
>>25526873

Perfect!

the thing about horses that MLP got right is that mares are in charge,

http://www.successful-horse-training-and-care.com/lead-mare.html


https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Stallion

Contrary to popular myths, many stallions do not live with a harem of mares. Nor, in natural settings, do they fight each other to the death in competition for mares. Being social animals, stallions who are not able to find or win a harem of mares usually band together in stallions-only "bachelor" groups which are composed of stallions of all ages. Even with a band of mares, the stallion is not the leader of a herd, but defends and protects the herd from predators and other stallions. The leadership role in a herd is held by a mare, known colloquially as the "lead mare" or "boss mare." The mare determines the movement of the herd as it travels to obtain food, water, and shelter. She also determines the route the herd takes when fleeing from danger. When the herd is in motion, the dominant stallion herds the straggling members closer to the group and acts as a "rear guard" between the herd and a potential source of danger. When the herd is at rest, all members share the responsibility of keeping watch for danger. The stallion is usually on the edge of the group, to defend the herd if needed.

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>>25526067
>aww this is cu- wait what is he doing

>>25527450
He's establishing his role as alpha male.

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>>25526316
Thanks, Anon. It's strangely satisfying knowing that I can inspire boners to complete strangers.
That was the plan. And now you've got one.

>>25524343

>The area immediately in front of you expands and contracts simultaneously as space/time forcibly connects two locations that were never meant to touch.
>All you see is blackness as the universe folds in on itself and the laws of physics struggle to comprehend just what the hell is happening to them.
>Colours spew from the singularity in front of you, rapidly covering the entire visible spectrum. You are briefly able to see in infra-red. Twilight's glowing form seems to reverse-implode into existence before you.
>There's a flash of light and a lingering smell of ozone as the universe decides that Twilight Sparkle is, and has ALWAYS been, occupying the space where all this confusion was happening.
>And so stands your favourite purple mare in all her horsey glory.

>"I came as quickly as I could!"
>unf
>Despite how dismissively as she regards the foundations of reality, Twilight looks at you not with condescension, but with concern.
>"Are you alright, Anon? Mister Bean said you had an accident. Did you step on a broken mug?
>She whips her head back and forth, her nose close to the ground like a bloodhound.
>She stops after a few moments, however, and looks at you with a sheepish look on her face.
>"Oh, right. I keep forgetting that you wear sho-oh."
>She's staring at your blistering forearm with a look of horror.
>"Oh! Oh Celestia, Anon, what in Equestria happened to you!? You promised me this would be a SAFE job!"

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>>25526092
>"Yes daddy "

Goddamn.

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>>25527560

>SB: "Looks like it blew a gasket."
>In the time it took Twilight to make the universe shrug and turn away, Steam Bean's removed the chassis of the broken machine and braved the dangers of the Misses Espresso.
>Thankfully, it burned through its' entire water supply, so there was no more steam.
>Purple magic envelops the brown-coat, black-mane stallion and tugs him away.
>TS: "Stay away from that!"
>Twilight wraps you up in her sickly purple light, and you prepare yourself for teleportation. You wonder how this will feel on your arm.
>As you deal with the dual sensations of no longer existing, and also occupying two places at once, you ponder on just how BADLY THIS HURTS.
>Sometimes Twilight seems to forget things when she's panicking.
>For example, the Rise and Grind is two blocks away from the library.
>You collapse onto the floor as soon as Twilight has finished working her black-magic bullshit on you.
>Seems like your blisters have ruptured.
>Not to worry, though. More are quickly taking their place.
>She's running off towards the bathroom as soon as her hooves hit the floor, leaving you alone.
>But before you know it, she's back and is busy spreading burn cream/topical pain-killer onto your arm, before wrapping it up with bandages.
>TS: "Hold still, Anon!"
"Well, stop being so rough!"

>>25527874
IS GOOD STUFF COMRADE, SHOULD WRITE MORE OF IT.

ON OTHER NOTE WHAT IS PONE THOUGHTS ON STEVE IRWIN IN REVERSEQUESTRIA? POOR STEVE WOULD NEVER GET TO TO WRESTLE WITH THE SHELIA'S IF THE PONE KEEP HIM FROM HIS WAIFU WITH THE SCALEFU

>>25527912
Nigger you what?

He will rassle whatever the fuck he wants

In horseland that means dragons manticores and hydras

While mares masterbate furriously in the distance

>>25527912
>>25527968
>Steve Irwin in Equestria
I didn't even realise this was something I wanted.

>>25526092
I wonder what would happen if another child is made.

>>25528059
panic

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Feeling off my game today.

>>25527874
>Day twenty minutes later in Equestria
>"Damn it, Anon, you said this was a safe job."
>Twilight's managed to calm down a bit, and the two of you are sitting on the couch together, enjoying a nice drink.
>Tea, thank you.
>You've had enough coffee for a while.
>You sigh and explain yourself for the third time.
"Twilight, it IS a safe job. What happened to day was a freak occurrence."
>Twilight won't relent.
>"But what if it had been your face instead of your arm? We don't know enough about humans to reconstruct your eyeballs, Anon."
>Yeesh. You hadn't thought of that.
>The two of you sit in silence, each contemplating what could have been.
>Twilight speaks up just a few minutes later.
>"I'm sorry, Anon."
>The fuck is she apologizing for? She didn't plan for that Misses Espresso to explode, did she?
"For what, the teleportation? Twilight, it's fine. I wasn't looking forward to wal-"
>"No, no; not that. I'm sorry that I let you get a job."
"...wait, what? How did you 'let me' get a job, Twi?"
>She's not meeting your eyes.
>"Well.... technically speaking, I have some limited legal influence over you, because I'm your Alpha-Mare."
>Your what?
"My what?"
>"According to Equesetrian law, Anon, if a mare and a stallion live together for a period of time longer than six months, they are legally considered to be a part of the same herd."
>You're silent for good stretch of time.
"....Is THAT how that works."
>Twilight flinches at your tone.

>>25528041
>Steve Irwin encounters Gummy
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=pU0UFbxZDGM

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>>25528129
>"And now I'll jam my thumb up it's butthole!"

>>25528129
He would wonder where his teeth went

How anyone could do such a thing to a bueeeety

>>25527427
We need Anon to watch a docudrama or read a book about this.

>>25528254
>Ponies herding was all a big lie that Ponyville came up with to fool Anon because everyp0ny wanted his monkey dick
>Anon doesn't bother telling them he knows

>>25528272
>Twilight walks out of the Canterlot Xeno lab, goes to Ponyville, puts all the single mares into the conspiracy, threatens everyone else, and publishes a book on Equine culture for Anon to read once he's finished being cleared from bio-containment.

>All for the hot monkey dick.

>>25528121
Wait a sec... Anon has diplomatic immunity...

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>>25528041
Do you want pony Steve Irwin, or do you want Anon fucking around in Ponyville, wrasslin' with pones?

>>25528121

>You are Twilight Sparkle, and you have ROYALLY bucked up.
>Sure, you probably should have told Anon about the whole, time-sensitive legal marriage thing, but you didn't want him to panic and run away to who KNOWS where.
>You mean, you brought him into this world, and it's your responsibility to take care of him!
>And when you remembered the herd law, well...
>All you had to do was wait, and then you would be able to protect Anonymous from a legal standpoint.
>Look, it would be different if you had to go out of your way to fill out forms or get a license or whatever.
>Really, all you did was NOT act to prevent it.
>That's a completely different ethical dilemma.
>You were doing what any mare would do for a stallion in need. And by Celestia, Anonymous NEEDED you!
>He still does!

>And, maybe, there might have been a few personal feelings that could have factored into your decision.
>It's not like Anon is ugly, or anything.
>Broad withers; muscled forelegs; a couple of nice, hard edges on his face...
>On top of that, his belly rubs were to DIE for.
>You've never been touched like that before....
>....is what you WOULD say if you were a virgin.
>Which you aren't.
>You've done the kissing with LOTS of colts.
>It's not like you cry sometimes when you masturbate or anything.

>......

>So Anon, right?
>He isn't like any other colt you know.
>Which is lots.
>Like, he never does that passive-aggressive "say one thing but mean another" thing that your friends complain about to you.
>He hates shopping (praise the sun).
>And sometimes he does this thing where he'll pin you to the couch and rub his hands all over your body.
>Celestia you love that.
>You're pretty sure he's trying to tickle you, but those hoof-spiders feel too good to tickle.
>You thank Celestia every morning that Anon doesn't recognize the smell of mare musk.

>>25528361
Look.
Uh.
Shit.

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>>25528361
>>25528602

>>25528602
Doesn't matter, keep going?

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>>25527912
>If Steve Irwin were still alive today he may very well have had his own background pony

>>25528579
noice

>>25528696
Nope, gotta scrap the entire story now. Sorry, Anons.

>>25528815
Seriously though, I'm done for the night.

>>25528815
RIP The dream

>>25528854
But... The dream was so beautiful

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>>25527450
My reaction, exactly.

>>25528971
Dream was never kill. only sleep. patience, anon. will find out what happens next soon


>>25529015
are you suggesting i waste my gift sir
because i will take this as a challenge

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>>25528579
>>It's not like you cry sometimes when you masturbate or anything.
fucking hell twilight

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>>25529209
There are no breaks on the incest train, Anal.

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>>25529209
>are you suggesting i waste my gift sir
The current CoffeeBurn story is good, and I think continued updates to that one would be most appreciated, but the next time you return to smut writing, could it be more about the public / casual sex with one or two voyers nearby, and less about the incestuous pedophilia feeling?

As far down the rabbit hole as many of us have gone, there are still some barriers that are likely to generate as much dislike as enjoyment.

Like the other anon and I both said, the story was going well, with the implied background, character interactions feeling natural, and the setting and plot progress flowing along at a reasonable pace, but the combination of wtf and squick is a bit much.

>>25529284
I see where you're coming from, Anon, and I agree. When it's spread out for me like that, there's really no getting around that the smut crosses some lines. It was meant to be a one-time thing based on a dumb post an Anon made, and it should have ended there. This was the first time sharing any of the smut that I've written, and I guess I got too excited when it went over well.

Thanks for posting this, Anon. You've let me see this from another point of view and made me realize that that things got weird.

>>25529284
Also, I hope you won't mind if I make "CoffeeBurn" the official title of the current story.

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>>25524234
>something hot and tall

>>25528579
Are we to assume Minotaurs have never had a formalised name for 'fingers' before Anon came along?

I'm sorry for being a nitpicky bitch.

>>25529466
If I may counterpoint, weird stuff, while appealing to a smaller audience, absolutely has a fan base.

And, as someone into such weird things, actually managing to find any is the highlight of almost any day.

>>25529573
I like to think that Anon's fingers have a different enough bone structure, sensitivity, and dexterity that they could technically be classified differently than what a Minotaur has.

>>25529613
I understand that feel far too well, Anon. As a person also of weird tastes, writing (let alone GOOD writing) is difficult to come by and exciting to find. I'm not going to lie to you, Anon, a few things are rare enough that when I DO find fresh material, sometimes I'll just go, "Fuck it, I guess I'm just looking at porn today."

But a lot of people are coming into this thread for RGRE greens, not to see under-age incest smut. There's a time and a place for everything, Anon. And I don't want to be known as "That Guy".

Maybe in another thread.

>>25529724
Yeah plus if you were that guy you'd have competition with This Guy over in the wardrobe malfunctions thread.

>>25529784
OH U

>>25529724
Well, it does fall under the idea in a way.
What's acceptable for a male? What can they get away with? What would be seen as fatherly?

As you said yourself, when it comes to polygyny, "If papa ain't happy, ain't nobody happy.".

Can't let you die here thread.

Do you guys think that in the RGR version of horse japan the school colts get molested by office mares on the trains?

>>25528711
>"No, Anon, you need to stop! P-please? If you could?"
>Twist goes the foreleg around the lil' critter's head...
>"Mr. Bear! Oh dear, Please Anon Mr. Bear doesn't want to play anymore!"
"Easy there lil' one, don't you know that Ursa Horriblus can rip a man to shreds if'n he's not careful!?"
>Mr. Bear gives a loud growl at you.
"Cricky I done made him mad now! I'll have to subdue him with a jab in his arm pit! It'll put him right to sleep it will!"
>The little yellow horse flutters up to eye level at that, "No! D-don't do that Mr. Bear h-has a sore spot there!"
"Aha I knew it!"
>Fingers digging into the pit you press hard into the tense nerve cluster bringing to bear your full might.
>The bear that had been struggling against you for the past five minutes stiffens then slump bonelessly in your arms.
"Ha now that's a good 'un."
>"Anon!"
"Wot now missy?"
>Fluttershy, thats' her name right, glares at you, well you would say glare but it's more like a puppy staring soulfully at you.
>Must resist...
>"Anon I know you like furry critters as much as I-I do, but you can't give them such aggressive massages! L-look at poor Mr. Bear he's gone into early hibernation it looks like!"
"Daw, that's just him tryin' to lure you into a false sense of security!"
>Fluttershy huffs coming to land of a fence post of her little cottage as she thrusts her chest out.
>"Now you listen, and listen good, you need to ca-"
>Remembering the times with the film crew you decide to play up the act.
"Uhoh, it looks like the Equinus Pegasus is trying to defend her perch, if I'm not careful she could bash me good with her hooves or trample me in a flurry of wings!"
>"What?! I would never hurt a colt like thaaaaah~"
>Fingers deep in her chest fluff you move your digits exploring every nook and cranny of the silky smooth fur.
"The only way I'll make it out alive is if I calm her down with some heavy petting!"
>"Eep!"

>>25531428
I lol'd

>>25531428
"Now you have to be very careful while soothing a Equinus Pegasus, they can be VERY picky about who they let pet them. I've only recently gotten her comfortable enough for- there it is!"
>Fluttershy who had been leaning into your questing digits fully deployed her wings in a brillant display of golden feathers.
>"M-more p-please?"
>With one hand still on her chest you start to groom the mare's feathers.
"Now this is a marvelous sight for you folks at home, a Equinus Pegasus only displays her wings like this whenever she likes a potential mate or she's trying to scare off other Equinus Pegasus!"
>Fluttershy twitches at the word potential mate, but you pay it no worry mind, after all there's still a show to go on!
>...
>You made yourself a little sad...
>None the less you still have a fiesty little shelia on your hands as she starts to nuzzle into your arm.
"Oh boy, looks like the lil shelia's gotten affectionate on me!"
>A small chirp escapes Fluttershy making a faint blush cover her face as her wings flutter.
"What most folks don't know is that Equinus Pegasus have a very detailed muscleculture that is designed to help them fly, however that dense muscle culture also is tense from the constant flying they have to do."
>Fluttershy at this point tries to regain her bearings, "A-anon d-d-do you...wanna..."
>Sweeping the mare off her fence post you hold Fluttershy to your chest making the poor mare turn beet red.
"Now I have to be really careful now, Equinus Pegasus are known to lift over three hundred pounds to haul to their nest!"
>"A-anon?"
>Looking down at those sky blue eyes you give her a wink.
"What you can do if you're ever swooped up by a Equinus Pegasus however is this!"
>Bringing a finger down the middle of Fluttershy's back you stop in the nexus of her wing joints and press down.
>"PFhaaaaaaaaaaaaa!"
>With a muffled thump Fluttershy's wings spread out shivering in place while her legs go stiff.

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>>25531560
oh my

wingplay best play

>>25529466
Ignore him, that incest stuff was hotter than the coffee machine in your other story.

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>>25531428
>>25531560
L-Lewd.

>>25531560
"Now I got her just where I want her! All hot and bothered, not wanting to haul me off to her nest."
>Fluttershy wiggles in place feebly in your lap at that.
>"T-thats...ngh...n-not t-true..."
"Well at any rate I think it's about time for this lil shelia to be headin' to the kipper, tune in next time on the Discovery Channel kids!"
>Grin wide across the face you wave to the imaginary camera before sighing.
>"A-anon?"
>Oh right now you have a frustrated pegasus in your hands.
"Wot's that shelia?"
>"A-are you o-okay?"
>Before you can assure her that everything is fine she nuzzles under your chin.
>The soft brush of her mane is ticklish against your neck.
>"I-I know th-that it m-must be r-rough to be a-alone, b-b-but with a h-h-herd you wouldn't BE alone y-you know...."
>This pone, this pone right here.
>A sad smile crosses your face.
>Wrapping her in a hug you bury your face in her mane much to her shock as a few feathers puff out from her.
>"Eep!"
"I think somepony just earned a few wing rubs for that."
>"A-anon don't t-try to chaaaaah, Celestia above don't stop please please please...."
>One arm holding her rump to carry the little mare the other plays merry fiddle across her back.
>First a few scratches to clean out any dirt in the wings.
>Then tracing the muscles that line her limbs to find the tense spots.
>To finally bringing them into order with a few prods and pokes of superior human digits.
>Results in one blitzed out of her mind pony that is a puddle in your arms.
>Entering the cottage you find the couch to lay her down, poor shelia's just passed out from it all.
>One quickly tucked in mare later you're free to go and finish that moonshine still you've been working on.
>Stupid Applepone, hard cider your left foot....

Finished it for now, thoughts? Also I wanted to end it comfy like, did it work?

>>25531843
In the end
All of life was his friend.

Cute/10

>>25531843
Comfy.5/10

>>25531843
10/10 would steal and take credit for

>>25531695
This.

>>25531843
Seriously, you should writefag. You gave just the right amount of detail, and the dialogue flowed naturally.

>>25531273
That's not all they do on the trains.

>>25530352
I almost want to write something that would explore a darker AU, but that shit's too rough for me. I draw the line at legit foal-rape.

>>25531695
Fuck's sake. Show of hands, should I keep posting smut. Doesn't have to be... the subject matter I posted; just smutty things. Make requests for all I care. Let's just get the matter settled.

>>25532322
Check'd.

Do your own thing. Don't be a panda.

>>25532322
Post what you want to write. If anons dont like it they can just choose to not read it.

>>25532339
Voting box closed. No longer afraid to mate despite decreasing population.

>>25532322
For the record, I would be interested in that AU. Foal rape is for no, but there's a lot of other ways you could go with it. Militant feminist anon?

>>25532363
wait shit
was that unintentionally ironic
i listen to the first person who tells me to make my own decisions

>>25529487
Please, feel free. I take it as a compliment. It wouldn't be the first time I ended up throwing out a title that someone thought was good enough to pick up.

>>25532422
You're right, don't listen to people who tell you what to do.

>>25532417
Maybe, but to be honest, I probably won't. I'm not really into the darker stuff; god's sake, my first green was about ponies using buttplugs with plumage to attract a mate.

>>25532439
Nice. It beats "Anon Goes To the Burn Ward", at least.

>>25532422
Maybe if you could stop stealing doubles for a second we could help you!

>>25532417
God, no. That sounds awful.
>>25532322
Write what you enjoy writing, just don't limit yourself to 'no smut allowed' just because someone whined on the Internet.

>>25532527
Meh. I'm just spitballing

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>>25531843
I think it worked, anon.

Super cute.

>>25532322
I did? Jeez, I usually muck it up with being too wordy. Glad I could indulge, I just like comfy feels.

bamp.
need more writefags.
hurry up assholes.

>>25532322
Post all the stories, smutty or not.
>>25532494
Write burn ward smut.
>>25533457
How about you write something too then?

>Be horrifically burned Anon
>You are in the pony hospital burn ward.
>It turns out that you can't just climb into a giant envelope and avoid the wait of a train by using dragon fire
>"I should never have left you two alone like that, I'm so sorry."
>You'd reply but your burns prevent that

>>25533684

How do you think RGRE would respond to a dude of Jackass-level intellect?

Just some drunken, hold-my-beer yabo flying by the seat of his pants.

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>>25533703
He and Dash would be best friends before the first week was out. Others might see it as a challenge. A challenge to tame this new, wild male.

Skimming through the thread, I see a bit of incest RGRE green. Almost makes me tempted to be a bit of an ass and write up a continuation to that foalsitting scootaloo green where things go in the way of cheap porn movies. But right now I'm feeling quite lazy so I'll be lurking for a few days or so.

>>25534540
I'd read it, but then, I read just about everything posted in this thread.

>>25534540
Did you ever do more of that prison RGRE?

>>25526067
I hope there's more. How about trying it at a birthday party?

>>25534601
Nah, After I got diagnosed with depression I kinda just dropped off of the threads and stuff for a while. Had to try adjusting and dealing with real life shit. So it is still in the works but I might be a while before doing anything, remember I am a little bit slow.

>>25534625
:( Sucks man. Well I hope for its continuation in the future.

>>25534606
Oh dear, i didn't read the rest of the posts. Maybe you can post more greens at the age difference thread analpluganon?

>>25405646

>>25534625
Hope you feel better. I know how much it sucks

bread?

>>25535188
Rye?

>>25533684
>>Post all the stories, smutty or not
Thanks, Durnk. Let me tell you, I have had practice. Dis gon be gud

>>Write burn ward smut.
.....On it.

>>"I should never have left you two alone like that, I'm so sorry."
Oh god, Twilight sounds so resigned. It's like she's finally realized that Anon is a special-needs human.

>>25534625
Oh, Slownon, I'm so sorry. I know how hard it can be. The writefriends are here for you.

>>25534644
You're a smart nigger, Anon.

>>25535438
Did you just chain three oxymorons together?
Impressive. Very nice.

>>25533703
>>25533951
Think someone had a take on it a long time ago:

http://pastebin.com/mTEuPQrx
http://pastebin.com/vgGBtCbG
http://pastebin.com/ZYCbrtJH

Though I wished it would have gone on longer.

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>>25535438
If they fit the RGRE theme, post them in both.

>>25535766
How am i supposed to rub your belly now, Sweetie Belle?

>>25535426
Finish that shit you got started.

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Burn ward smut incoming.


>You are Anon
>You are sitting on a bed in Ponyville Hospital's burn ward.
>You are covered in pones.

"Doctors? Is all this really necessary?"
>The yellow pony latched onto your back coos in your ear and nuzzles the back of your head.
>"Shhhhh...."
>The dark blue pony looks up at you from your lap with an upside-down smile while you absently rub her belly.
>>"Mister Anonymous, the pre-healing cuddling is VERY important. Not only does it relax the patient, but it also encourages the painkiller we gave you to settle in your system."
>She wriggles in you lap and giggles when her stethoscope falls off from around her neck.

>If you hadn't been living in Equestria for the past 8 months, you wouldn't have believed that for a second.
>On your way to the burn ward, you witnessed doctors snuggling crying patients.
>Not to mention the nurses big-spooning patients who were waiting for a doctor to help them.
>The yellow one had introduced herself to you as "Doctor Twinkle Bluegrass".
>The dark-blue one is "Doctor Sleepy Lily"
>Heh
>Doctor "TB".
>If ponyland had that disease, you're sure Dr. Bluegrass would appreciate the irony.

>TB: "How are you feeling, Mister Anonymous? Ten minutes ago, when I asked you to rate your pain from a scale of one to ten, you said it was a seven."
>Pony Doctor number two finishes for Pony Doctor number once.
>SL: "How would you rate your pain now?"
"Mmmm.... I'd say a two or a three."
>Turns out that while you may be almost immune to DIRECT magic, you still process INDIRECT magic like any other creature in Equestria.
>Healing spells don't work, but enchanted drugs do.

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>>25535955
Short smut first, long RGRE story after.

>>25536367

>The yellow doctor smiles and makes a pleased noise. Her horn glows and a clipboard floats over.
>TB: "Very good. That means we can proceed. Doctor Lily?"
>Sleepy Lily whined and tried to wriggle deeper into your lap, clutching possessively at your arm.
>SL: "Nooooo~"
>Twinkle Bluegrass sighs and gently removes herself from your back.
>TB: "Sleepy, please."
>But Sleepy Lily was not one to give up hoof-spider belly-rubs so easily.
>SL: "But, he's so warm!"
>Oh god you're about to die from how adorable this is.
>How can my pony doctor be this cute?

>Doctor Total Biscuit eventually convinces Sleepy Lily to remove herself from the warm embrace of your crotch and reminds her that they have a stallion in their hooves.
>Much like the doctor-cuddling, you would have been mildly upset by that sexist remark, but you've made friends with some colts in Ponyville.
>It was like the entire male population was ambiguously (and yet flamboyantly) gay.
>0/10 no hairy lumberjack boner

>TB: "Mister Anonymous-"
"Doctor Bluegrass, you've been licking my neck and sniffing my hair for the last half-hour. You can call me 'Anon'."
>The good doctor blushes, and complies.
"Same goes for you, Doctor Lily. I can smell myself on you all from all the way over here."

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>>25536388

>TB: "Alright, Anon. In that case, I insist that you refer to us as "Twinkle" and "Sleepy".
>TB: "Now, as I was saying..."
>She shoots a mock-glare in your direction.
>TB: "Now that the drug has reached stage one, we can proceed with your burn."
>While Twinkle goes to her adorably-tiny drug-cupboard, Sleepy guides you through the healing process.
>SL: "You don't have to worry too much about what the drugs do once they enter your system. You probably wouldn't understand it, anyway."
>Doctor Tuberculosis comes back with a container in her magic and slathers a generous amount onto your wound.
>It feels deliciously cold on your burned skin.
>Tingles, too.

>.......Oh.
>Oh my.
>That's not the only thing that's tingling.
"Uh, doctors?"
>You point down to your crotch. You're painfully hard.
>TB: "Oh dear! That's not supposed to happen. Does it hurt?"
>You grit your teeth at the terrible pressure in your pants.
"Yes, very!"
>TB: "On a scale of one to ten, how wo-"
"Twinkle!"
>Twinkle looks slightly sheepish for a moment, then runs over to her medical encyclopaedia and beings to skim through it.
>Sleepy, on the other hand, is slightly more frantic.
>She must be a newly-qualified doctor.
>SL: "We have to get the swelling down!"
>TB: "Sleepy, keep it together. I've nearly figured it out."
>Sleepy shakes her head and tears your pants off with her magic.
>SL: "No, quickly! Before it bursts!"
>Before it what?
>Sleepy dives into your lap and engulfs the head of your cock in her mouth.
>Twinkle sighs in annoyance, and turns to face you.
>"Sleepy, it isn't going to bur-"
>Dead silence.

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>>25536421
Heading to class now. I'll finish this up later and then I'll get back to CoffeeBurn.

>Nobody speaks.
>Nobody moves.
>The only sounds being made are Sleepy slurping and gasping as she desperately tries to get you off.
>Her tongue is thick and wide, and it seems to be able to cover areas you never even knew existed.
>I-is pony sex the best sex?
>You sure hope so.
>You'd be pushing the mare off of you if it weren't for your 8-month dryspell.
>Sleepy removes your cock from her mouth with a wet pop.
>"Twinkle, help! It isn't working!"
>While she talks, she furiously rubs the length of your shaft with the frog of her hoof.
>"I think there's some sort of blockage preventing Anon from ejaculating; I've been stimulating him for over 45 seconds."
>Twinkle still hasn't moved yet. You try and break the heavy silence.
"It's.... going to take a lot longer than 45 seconds, Sleepy..."
>From the corner of your eye you can see a clipboard float over in Twinkle's direction.
>SL: "Really? How long to humans last?"
"I dunno; anywhere between five and fifteen minutes, I guess."
>Sleepy Lily's medical professionalism is the only thing that's keeping the hoofjob going; she looks utterly astonished.
>There's sudden movement from over in Twinkle's direction.
>TB: "Dibs!"
>Twinkle rushed over and begins to fight Sleepy over your saliva-soaked cock.
>Sleep shoves Twinkle back and opens her mouth to pick up where she left off.
>SL: "N-no fair! I got here first, Twinkle!"

>>25536463
Incoming hot monkey dick,

>>25536463
>>There's sudden movement from over in Twinkle's direction.
>>TB: "Dibs!"
kek'd

>>25536421
>You point down to your crotch. You're painfully hard.
>TB: "Oh dear! That's not supposed to happen. Does it hurt?"
>You grit your teeth at the terrible pressure in your pants.
>"Yes, very!"
>TB: "On a scale of one to ten, how wo-"
>"Twinkle!"

And this is the part where they take the syringe and begin draining the blood from his penis while trying to eliminate the local blockage, right?

>>25536740
2slow

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>Looking through the archives for old completed stories while waiting for fresh green
>Find a good one from a year ago
>"Will definitely still be working on this, considering how close it is to completion."
>It's not complete
This must be what Hell feels like.

>>25536800
Dubs confirm Hell is indeed an abyss of unfinished green.

>>25536800
>You are lucifer, sitting atop your throne of dicks
"Aaah, it's good- eer, bad to be bad."
>You crack open your personal newspaper, also made out of dicks
>Making freud an archdaemon was.... not your best move
"Let's see... aah. Finally, Daring Douche 2 is starting up again! And right next to the next chapter of JAGOG. How wonde-eer, terribad. Yes. Horribad. If only I could get through all these pages of LaP's writing..."
>You take a sip of your liquid PCP from you "World's Best Shitposter" mug as you start reading the horsecock news
>Thank badness that you burned every copy of this newspaper when you were done
>Right infront of >>25536800's eyes, too
>That always brought a smile to your face
>The little fuck
>Tonight was a hell-hath-no-fury-like-green-witheld kinda night

>Anon and Gilda are dating
>Everypony thinks she's abusing him
>He thinks it's a normal relationship

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>>25537494
>not fighting each other for control and having passionate, painful sex

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>>25537538
>Implying she's not a complete sub behind closed doors.
Come on, you can see the outline where she hides the collar under her feathers when she goes out.

>>25537557
I love this artist's style. His collared characters really appeal to me.

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>>25537557
thats kinda hot

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>You are Anon.
>You wake with a start and immediately shield your eyes.
>You're lying on what... feels to be.... grass.
>Yes, grass.
>You guess that means you're in a field.
>And, as you belatedly realize, you are naked.
>...What did you do last night?
>"Over there! That's from where the magical disturbance originated!"
>Oh, good. A witness to your unconscious nudity.
>>"I don't know, Twilight. I STILL say the light came from the east."
>WitnessES, sorry.
>Still out of sorts and a little disorientated, the thought of covering your groin doesn't occur to you.
>Not that it would matter, seeing as how you're now floating in the air.
>What?
>"Ah! See, Rainbow Dash? It's here!"
>You're turned to face.... two small, colourful horses.
>You think?
>They don't really have long horse faces, and their eyes are big and expressive instead of small and beady.
>If they had been human, you would say that their facial expressions showed shock and excitement.
>"It's obviously male....."
>Shit the bed, they can speak.
>There's a long silence where you just stare at each other, before the purple one speaks up.
>"Dibs."
>>"ExCUSE me?"
>Blue-guy looks PISSED.
>"You heard me; dibs. We both saw a male, and I use my magic to get him before you used your wings to capture him. I won, fair-and-square."
>The blue one can only grumble bitterly in defeat.
>You float downwards towards the purple horse, who is smiling at you warmly.
>In this new and confusing situation, you mentally latch onto her for safety.
>For the moment being, purple-horse is your rock.
>"Hey there little guy. You and me are gonna be best friends, okay?"
>Her eyes dart down to your crotch and then back to you.
>Your penis is now diamonds.
>Purple-horn licks her lips.
>"The VERY best of friends."

Okay writefriends, I'm leaving this to you to continue.

>>25539435
>You then punch her in the face since Twilight a shit.
>Good end.

>>25539547
i will fite u

>>25539435
>"AH AH AH! Not so fast, darling!"
>Oh look, a white horse is here
>White knight?
>white horse knight. a whight.
>"Rarity-"
>So that's one name down
>"-I captured this male with my magic; therefore, he's now in my herd-"
>"Hmmmmm, you would be correct, but you forget one thing~!"
>"Oh? And what's that?" Purple says, turning around to -
>Oh wow she's presenting herself at you
>Posh white horse grins. "Why, darling, his cock is diamonds."
>You blink
>"S-so?!"
>"So?! Look at my cutie mark-"
>She flashes her ass at you both
>"-and my gem-finding spell means that I claim any gems I find. And-"
>With a grunt her horn lights up, and you feel your balls get fondled
>"-and these gems are quite a beauty~"
>She licks her lips as, quite unceremoniously, your hips are tugged towards whitehorse's face
>Eh. You've had worse Tuesdays.

>>25539569
loving where thi sis going

>>25528579
Hope Anon doesn't lose his job.

>>25536463

>TB: "Too bad, I outrank you!"
>She magically shoves her co-worker off to the side and resumes your hoofjob.
>Pre-cum dribbles down your shaft and Twinkle licks her lips.
>TB: "Hey! So, where is your sheath? Do humans have sheaths? Is this an example of an average penis? What's with this weird scar just below this engorged part? Is it going to flare when you cu-HURK
>And there goes doctor-pone.
>Sleepy Lily wastes no more time now that she has competition.
>With a sigh and a mumbled, "Dad would be so proud," Doctor Badtouch positions herself over your cock and slowly sinks down.

>Pleasure, white-hot, screams through your body.
>If you thought Sleepy's mouth was hot, then it's nothing compared to the inferno encasing your dick.
>You mean "hot" literally.
>Is horse pussy supposed to be so warm?
>You think you remember reading somewhere that horses have a higher body temperature than humans.
>Sleepy Lily is rolling her hips and is clearly enjoying herself.
>You're a little put off by how she's whispering "please don't sue for rape" over and over again, but hey.
>Free pussy.
>And it didn't even come from your daughter.
>Uh-oh, Twinkle's back on her hooves and her magic-horn is magicking like SHIT.
>TB: "W-wait, I'll tell on you!"
>Seriously?
>That's some middle-school tier bullshit, Twinkle.
>SL: "Nuh-uh!"
>God dammit, Sleepy.
>TB: "Yeah-huh!"
>SL: "I'll just get Anon to v-vouch for me! He'll say that you t-tried to rape him!"
>She whips her head to you so fast you feel sweat spray from her mane.
>SL: "W-won't you, Anon? Huh?"
>She's panting now.
>You decide to put off giving Sleepy a proper answer and instead grab her flank with one hand and pull her mouth to yours with the other.
>SL: "Mmmoaahhh~"
>God you love the sounds she's making.
>You can feel her winking every time you bottom out.

>>25539877

>TB: "Anonymous, y-you fucking slut..."
>Is she crying? Is the monkey D really that good? Do stallions ACTUALLY last 45 seconds?
>You'd cry too if you couldn't get some dick like that.
>.....
>N-no homo
>Sleepy breaks away from you and leaves behind a warm mouthful of her saliva.
>She tastes like roasted marshmallows.
>You don't know why but that is turning you on like CRAZY.
>TB: "Oh-or, he could rightly accuse us buh-huh-hoth of rape."
>You can DO that?!
>Why didn't Twilight tell you this?!
>You've never felt so powerful before.
>If Twinkle can't get the D, ain't NOPONY gettin' the D.
>Sleepy stops, but you can still feel her internal muscles squeezing you with as much strength as your own hand.
>SL: "...Anon, do you haaaaaohgoodness... have any idea how m-much a doctor makes ina-in a year?"
>What?
>Sleepy looks victorious, and Twinkle looks like a crushing weight has just been lifted from her withers.
>Not being accused of rape will do that to anybody.
>Is she trying to bribe you so that you don't charge her for rape?
>Or does she want this to become a regular thing?
>You're not sure you want to be her perma-prostitute.
>"Or how many bits TWO doctors will make in a year?"
>Twinkle crawls on the bed towards you, carefully avoiding touching Sleepy, who has resumed her rolling and is currently enjoying an orgasm.
>"Herd with us, Anon, and you'll never want for anything ever again. All you have to do is keep an eye on our foals, make sure dinner is hot when we get home, and to keep up with us in the bedroom."
>How can you say no to that?

yay shitty smut is over
back to shitty main story

>>25539989
Look at that shit, Durnk. Burn ward smut.

>>25539435
Well that chain went far

Anon's waifu has a marecave, which he isn't allowed inside.
Anon has a mancave, which his waifu isn't allowed inside.
One day, they find themselves in each other's cave, only to find that they're identical.
Hilarity ensues.

>>25540033
>>25540022
Does this mean we get coffee burn now?

>>25540554
Coming right up.

>>25540970
Yay! :D

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>>25528579

>You are still Twilight
>And it has been a rough couple of minutes.
>He is staring at you and you can tell that he is not impressed with you.
>If you two were together (which you technically are, you suppose), you would be sleeping on the couch for the foreseeable future.
"Well, Anon. It really is quite simple."
>Oh fudge he's quirking an eyebrow at you. He's staring you down like your dad used to do to your mom.
"And that reason, which I am SURE you will find logical and satisfactory...."
>oh buck oh shit what do you even say
>'surprise! we're married!'
>Buckin'...
>'oops, right?'
"Here it is. As follows, my... flow of thought? Has made... the path clear to me"
>oh Celestia you are so terrible at bullshitting.
>"Twilight. Sparkle."
>The pooch has indeed been screwed by yours truly
>"I want an explination, and I want it NOW."
>Despite the danger that you know you're in, the first thought that springs into your head is, "Patient, yet firm. Good for raising foals."
>Time and place, ovaries. Time and place.
>Celestia, doesn't he realize that you were trying to keep him safe from other mares?
>Anon is an naive sweetheart and you just know he would be ruined by CUNTS like the spa twins.
>And don't even get you started on how Mrs. Cake was behaving around him.
>Is that what he is to all of them? A fucktoy? A herdwrecker?
>You know what? No!
>No, you did a GOOD THING, dammit!

>>25541245
Don't stop!

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>>25541245

>You can't remember the last time you've felt this angry, and you're barely in control of yourself.
>You're chomping at the bits to say something; anything to Anon, just so long as it's hurtful.
>In a deceptively-calm growl, you prepare to dismantle him.
"How dare you."
>"What?"
"How DARE you, Anon! You what an explanation? You want to know what I've done?"
"What I've DONE, Anonymous, was give you a place in my house, food to eat, clothes to wear, and a warm bed to sleep in."
>Shhh no thoughts; only anger now.
"On top of all that, I have kept you safe."
>"You kept me SAFE?! From who?"
>You can't do this. You really can't do this right now. You have reached your limit of how much CRAP you can put up with, and filly, Anon's bullshit just keeps on coming.
"From RAPISTS on the STREET, you bucking idiot! With you walking around, dressed as a... as a... a SLUT, you co-"
>"ExCUSE me?!"
>Oops
>"A slut? What the hell are you even talking about, Twilight?"
>colt BETTER not be taking that tone with you.
>"Twilight, The only skin you can see on me are my arms and my head. My bits are all covered up. That's the OPPOSITE of slutty clothing, you jackass."
>Hey, now. There's no reason to bring racial slurs into this argument.
"Exactly! You're covering yourself up like you're too GOOD for any of us; like-like we're not even worth making the effort!"
>Magicking him into a couch cushion and jumping onto his lap, you being to poke Anon in the chest to punctuate your words.
"I have done so much for you, Anonymous, and I ask for so very little in return. Don't you get mad at me for protecting you."

>>25541375
See Twilight, this is why you aren't getting laid.

>>25541375
>"Twilight, The only skin you can see on me are my arms and my head. My bits are all covered up. That's the OPPOSITE of slutty clothing, you jackass."
>Hey, now. There's no reason to bring racial slurs into this argument.

It's funny to consider the human world equivalent of this.

>"Your assertion that I'm dressing like a slut is absurd, you wetback."

>>25541375
Oh shit, Anon, you gonna take that?

>>25541375
>implying Anon is the one trapped in town with all these dangerous horses.

Silly book grape.

>>25541679
>"I'm not trapped in here with you, you're all trapped in here with me!"

>You are sort of wobbling rather than walking home with Caramel at your side, but you don't really mind all that much
"Yes dude! I cannot believe I finally broke my PR I am SO AMPED!"
>Caramel jumps a little at your sudden outburst, followed by a light giggle
>Some of the other ponies walking past also take note of the loud human
>You don't care, they could be mirin, hatin', or anything in between because you fucking broke your PR!
>"And I've lost three whole pounds!" Caramel chirps
>He'd lose more if he just started lifting with you, but he refuses because he's scared of "turning out like Big Mac"
>You look down and flex a little bit of everything
>Your veins, dat definition, dem gainz, you are pumped the fuck out and you love it!
"Dude I am feeling so damn good!"
>Caramel nudges your leg with his tush, "You're looking good too man"
>You rustle his mane
"Hey, you know what? So are you colt, those three pounds made a difference"
>He's beaming up at you as you unlock the front door
>You both walk in and breathe a sigh of relief to finally be home
>Relieved, but still pumped... it almost feel like a waste to be home
>You want to remember this feeling fro the next time you'e up for your next PR
"Say Caramel?"
>He glances over from the open fridge, "Yeah?"
"You still have one of those old timey cameras right?"
>Caramel scrunches his muzzle at you, "It's only two models behind Anon!"
>You wave a dismissive hand at him
"Whatever, just go get it"
>He trots off to his room
>"Did you see something interesting on the way here?"
>He returns with the camera looped around his neck
>You kneel down and take the camera off of him
"No dude, just sit down here next to me"
>You press down on his lower back, causing him to plop his rear right beside your kneeling form
>Arm outsretched you hold the camera pointing back at you
>"Anon, you're holding it backwards"
>You loop an arm over his shoulders and pull him close, flexing your chest and arms a little as you do so

>>25541755
"I know bro, I'm taking a selfie"
>He raises an eyebrow, "a what?"
"A selfie, y'know taking a picture of yourself"
>"Why not have somepony else take it for you, I could take it if you want"
"Nah man, it's like... you like you. Like right now, you're feeling great and want to capture that"
>"I don- well I do feel pretty good after my jog" he muses
"That's it bro, now smile"
>The camera whirrs and clicks and a polaroid rolls out from the slot at the bottom
>You flap the photo back and forth for a moment, letting the photo develop
>Caramel is sitting next to you, his forehooves are prancing a little with anticipation
>The photo looks like it's done and you bring it closer so you both can see
>It's a little off, kind of cuts your head off a bit at the top but...
>You're looking fuckin' choice and Caramel looks really good to, maybe, all these little ponies look cute to you
>Caramel snorts
"What's the matter?"
>"Well, I just... I think my hair is a little off in this picture, do you mind if we retake it?"
>And so you do
>Except his smile looked crooked so you had to take another
>And another
>Then you both made silly faces
>And the last one you were blinking, but at least you know where to hold the camera at now
*Click* *Whirr*
>You shake the photo while Caramel squees in place next to you
>"You know Anon I didn't really understand this at first, but it is SO fun!"
"Yeah bro, I'm not a big fan of these, but I'm feelin' it today Mr. Krabs"
>"Mr. who?"
"Hey, look at this one"
>He takes a gander and gasps
"What? One eye more narrow than the other again?"
>You are shoved playfully, "No you doof, we look great!"
"Hell yeah we do bro!"
>You take the polaroid and lay it down on a coffee table nearby
>"What are you doing?"
"I was gonna go find a book or something to keep it i-"
>"Nonono, we've gotta go show the guys, they'll love it!"
"C'mon 'Mel, this was just a silly thing that'll keep me motivated during my next PR attempt, the guys won't lov-"
>"WE LOVE IT!"

>>25541778
>You roll your eyes as you watch the guys clamor around the photos
>Then you feel a little giddy as you listen to them talk about which ones they liked best
>Some laughing and a few suggestions later and you're running home and bringing Caramel's camera with you back to the farm
>You and the guys travel around Ponyville snapping photos together for the rest of the day
>Broke your PR, taught your bros the silly trend that is selfies, today was a good day

>"Anon!" Caramel whines from his room
"What?!" you call out from the living room
>Caramel trots out all in a fluster, towel wrapped around his barrel and mane all damp
"Did the hot water run out?"
>He frowns as he thrusts something into your face
>"No! Look!" he whines
>You grab his hoof and feels some cards that upon closer inspection turn out to be polaroids
>They're all of Caramel?
>Most are blurry and the ones that aren't can't seem to capture most of him in the shot
>"My arms are too short to take them..."
"Sorry colt, I dunno what you want me to do ab-"
>Aww don't do the face bro
>He's got so much tugging power that you've run out of heartstrings and he's moved on to kidneystrings too
>Think man think! You can't take much more!
>Hmm-
>Ah! Idea...
"Say, do you know where Lyra lives?"
>And so a prototype "selfie arm" was invented
>Pop on the camera, and slip in a hoof to get the perfect length needed for any photo
>Just like on Earth, the trend exploded
>You didn't really expect it to catch on so well with all the stallions as it did, turns out your friends were pretty representative of the whole
>It was a little later, but eventually mares all around caught on too like you had expected
>Though the funny thing is that most won't admit they bought one when you ask how they're liking it
>You know for a fact that Rarity doesn't have a brother and her father already bought one, but hey every sale is a few bits in your pocket regardless of who it was bought for

A silly idea set in the Caramelverse

>>25541375
Anon might leave her over this.
"I want a divorce."

>>25541802
Burn the thread

>>25541375
I swear if anon bitches out to this

>>25542092
He won't. Anon, unlike the colts twi is used to, has balls of solid titanium.

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>>25541375
>You are Anon, and you want to be angry.
>Twilight just blew up at you because you didn't appreciate being non-consensually horsemarried to her, and you're too busy trying not to laugh about why Twilight called you a slut.
>These pones are genuinely insulted that you aren't aggressively helicoptering at them.
>That's the best thing you've heard all day.

>>25542243
I don't know why, but this post made me cackle like a mad man for a short bit. Good stuff analplug.

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>>25542292

>>25542243
>aggressively helicoptering at them.
i dont understand

>>25542392
You've never gyrated your hips making your cock spin around like a helicopters blades?

>>25542392

Do you not know how to impress a chick?

Did your father never teach you the most seductive act a man can perform?

I weep for our future.

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>>25542243

>>25542243
lame

>>25542421
oh that?

no
i havent

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I drew something for the thread.
Been here since day one and been commenting once in a while, but I felt like contributing a bit.

Pic may or may not be inspired by a certain anon.

Which mare is the most aggressive with colts?
Which is the most gentle?
And which are the most euphoric?

>>25542966
Should we use pic for OP next thread? I vote yes.

Also, nice dubs.

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>>25543501
>Which mare is the most aggressive with colts?
Rarity. She'd be like the super-pushy frat asshole who pushes the boundries too far on a regular basis, and only gets away with it because of their popularity and already existing reputation.

>Which is the most gentle?
Applejack. Growing up in a super traditional home, and having the gentle giant Big Mac as a brother, would make her hyper-aware of her effective super-strength that she got from kicking the crap out of trees almost every day of her life.

>And which are the most euphoric?
Cadance. Her role as "Love Princess" is self-given, and a sham. Some element of a little mind control, "date magic" was involved in all of her relationships, and she has very strong and vocal opinions on how relationships should go.

Of the main six, I'd say... Rainbow Dash. She's egotistical enough to act like she knows everything and be very expectant that others would worship the ground she flies over.

>>25543540
I vote against, just because I think OPs should be a single image rather than a comic. It's nice to just scroll down the catalog and see exactly what every image is without zooming in.

>>25542243
>>25542392
>>25542424
>You are Anon
>And this bitch right here.
>This bitch.
>You storm out of the room and head outside.
>Down the street, turn, towards the edge of town.
>Once you reach your destination you open the door and strap yourself in.
>A mare rushes outside when you start up the engine, but she has known you for too long to do anything more than watch.
>Lifting off the ground but not ascending like you normally would, you tilt forwards and advance.
>The rotors are magically strengthened, cutting through the roofs and walls as easily as air.
>A path of destruction now leads from the airfield to the library, and just keeps getting longer.
>Twilight is standing in the doorway, now staring up at you in shock.
>There goes her mailbox.
>The pony princess flees into her castle in terror, thinking that she will be safe inside.
>She is wrong.
>While you cannot simply charge in without ruining your vehicle, you can still cut away at it with your indestructible blades.
>Which is exactly what you do.
>Layer by layer her castle is cut away.
"IS THIS WHAT YOU WANTED, TWILIGHT SPARKLE?"
>You cannot hear her pleas over the sound of your engine.
>One last swoop brings the ceiling down on the pony princess.
>Today Twilight Sparkle learned a very important friendship lesson.
>"Do not fuck with a human with a helicopter."

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>>25543609
I agree. I also prefer when the opening image is a single eye capturing image. I was thinking about drawing some stuff based on old sexist ads like pic related.
I'm just unsure of who the mare should be in the image. I was thinking of Rainbow Dash or Spitfire

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>>25543688

>>25541802
I love these two together. The idea of equestrian mares using Anon's pseudo prosthetics as sex toys is just icing on the cake.

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>>25541802
nice, I was feelin' that story

>>25543604
>miss Rarity will never call you a handsome colt just to get a quick fuck
Why even live?

Which colt is the slutty colt?

>>25543852
>Which colt is the slutty colt?
Time turner. The little shit.

Bonus:
>Which colt is the unintentionally slutty colt?
Big Mac. Farmer's son, sweet and gentle, always willing to help the best he can. Can actually have romps in the hay. U-unf.

...his sister will cave in your skull, though.

>>25543501
>Which mare is the most aggressive with colts?
Rainbow Dash. She already pushes herself onto the wonderbolts; she'd do the same to any colt. See: pretty much every episode where she's given a little bit of power/fame/attention - she takes it too far.

>Which is the most gentle?
Applejack, for >>25543604 reasons. Or, paradoxically, Pinkie Pie - I don't think she'd do anything to actually hurt a colt intentionally, and would be the most likely to follow along with whatever he wanted to do (cause that would make him happy).

>And which are the most euphoric?
Dead heat between Twilight and Fluttershy.

Twilight, because books and autism. She seems like the type of mare that would have read the "12 Steps to a First Date, 5th edition" and then sperg out if we skipped step #6 (awkward tail flicking, see fig. 7).

Fluttershy, because she understands animals more than ponies or people. She wouldn't be so autistic as Twilight, but she would... very much not know how to act. I'm pretty sure she'd go to Rarity/Twilight for help, and then copy all the horrible advice they could/would give her.

Also lol why am I responding with this much thought to horses at 7:30AM?

>>25541375
I believe this >>25539547 is a relevant follow up to this as well.

>>25544054
i will still fite u

>>25541941
I uh, guess this story wasn't for you? Sorry Anon

>>25543703
I do too Anon I do too, glad someone picked up on the sex toy aspect

>>25543731
That you were Mr. Krabs, that you were

>>25543937
Time Turner is SO the sluttiest colt you could ask any of the colts in town, they'll tell you.

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>>25542966
Analplug finally got art?
Oh Anal! I'm so proud.
You've made it as a writefag, Anal. You've made it.

>>25544344
U do gud werds frend

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>>25542966
Oh gosh, Anon, I don't know what to say.
Is this what happiness feels like?

>>25544960
Hey. Hey, fucker. You do good stuff. You planning on continuing that accidental horse marriage story from earlier? I likeded it.

>>25544990
>>25544960
Seconded, I was really enjoying that

>>25543609
Don't y'all talk shit about my boy, Anon. This is some legit fanart for the thread, and we shouldn't waste it. Crop it, if worse comes to worst?

>>25543649
Anon can now be accepted into pony society.

>>25544054
Oh, if it weren't for that last part where Twilight called him a slut, he WOULD be. His top priority is not laughing in Twilight's face. That would end badly for him. I can see Twilight, inexperienced with the difficulties that come with an actual relationship, losing her tempter and booping Anon's nose.

>>25544373
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JPxcxb1Qk94

>>25544990
>>25544994
For you, Anon.

>>25545132
Will you continue the filly green in the age difference thread too?

>>25545205
Sure. It won't be updated as often as my main things, but yeah, it'll be there.

>>25539569
>"Why, darling, his cock is diamonds."
I died.

>>25543649
I identify as an Apache attack helicopter.

>>25544960
Glad you like it.
I like your stuff too, sempai ~ <3

Anon's mare/mares have to bisit the doctor due to sore pelvises, prolonged minor dehydration(which requires salt suplements to help fix) and over rubbed tummies.
Anon's sometimes a little too willing to help then with urges when they arise.
For the first time in their medical career, the doctor has to tell a mare to stop having so much sex.

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>Filthy Rich is a strong independent stallion who don't need no mare
>He built his business himself
>He suffered for years, barely scraping by
>But eventually, Barnyard Bargains turned a profit
>Now it's a nationwide chain, with stores from Manehattan to Stalliongrad
>When he met Spoiled, he thought he was in love
>When she asked for an administrative position, he agreed
>When she stole the company out from under him...
>Anger. Fury. He spent years fuming as she drove his business into the ground
>She cheated on him, turned their daughter into a spoiled brat, wasted their savings and destroyed his dreams
>That all changed when he met Anonymous
>A stallion who thinks like a mare, with amazing business sense to boot!
>Now he can get revenge

>Be Anon
>Your friend, Filthy Rich, wants to open a lemonade stand with you
>Okay, you need something to do all day instead of hanging around the library anyway

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>>25545766
>>sempai ~ <3
(pic related - it's me)
I've noticed you


>>25542243

>You are Anon, and you need an escape route.
>The urge to laugh in her angry, scrunchie face is too much, and you can feel yourself slipping.
>Your face hurts so bad right now, and you can feel your eyes watering.
>But you've got a weapon hidden on you, to be used as a last resort.
>You've listened in on enough conversations at work, and you know how to act like a colt.

>Be Twilight
>You can't back down now, not after what you said.
>You have to be firm and show Anon who wears the nothing in this relationship.
>If you back down now, he'll see it as a sign of weakness, and then he'll descend upon you like a flock of parasprites.
>Just gotta wait it out.
>.....
>AHA! He won't even look you in the eye!
>Alpha status achieved!
>What now, Anon!?
>...
>No, really, what now?
>Your guide to being an alpha herd-mare didn't say what to DO with the colt after you've established dominance.
>Maybe you should have punched him in the snout first?
>Wait, no, all you did was make Anon cry.
>You didn't establish dominance.
>You've just established that you're an asshole.
>You're going to need backup for this.

>Be Anon again.
>The plan was a success
>Twilight has teleported out to god-knows-where, and she'll probably be back in a few hours with a box of rose pedals and a bouquet of chocolates.
>Maybe now she can cool down enough that you can talk to her about why it's generally considered rude to marry someone without telling them, or asking them first.
>You know, there are time that you honestly wonder if Twilight straight-up has autism.