How many here has schizophrenia? Does it affect your reading?

>>9892542
how the hell is schizophrenia real? like just realize there's no one else in the room, like ghosts don't exist lmao

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>>9892548
Try to count the voices inside your head instead

You most likely wont mind many actual schizophrenics browsing this board.

Enjoy the soothing tunes of Wesley Willis instead
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zh942B0QmRU

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not me. i just have suicidal ideation, depression, and anxiety

>>9892648
These are normie-tier """""illnesses""""" that can be cured with simple lifestyle changes.

I have, its under control though, and no it does not affect my reading. It didnt when i werent taking my meds either. Sorry for the boring answer.

>>9892542
Reading requires attention, retention and imagination. Clinical schizophrenia does not impede on any of those near as much ADHD or any variant.

>>9892648
Chances are your doc/shrink will diagnose you with some kind of schizoid and/or bipolar disorder. I fled a "first world" country in order to dodge forced medication. Worked out just fine except for the imperishable melancolia.

Have you ever had a conversation with a schizophrenic person or watched footage of them in therapy? Outside of the novelty of their behavior and the possibility of studying them, they really aren't fun to talk to on a personal level. That's part of why you almost never see thoughtful, passionate interviews with schizophrenics, as opposed to people suffering other mental or personality disorders.

I haven't really figured out why that is yet. When I was 17 a schizophrenic kid who had ran away from home because of an abusive aunt caught up with me on the street when I was walking home from class and asked for help getting to the hospital. He must have been like 13 or 14. I walked him to the hospital and then to the police station when the hospital wouldn't take him, and we talked during the whole walk. It was really fucking bizarre and still breaks my heart to this day. He was clearly a sweet kid and didn't deserve what was happening to him, but it was impossible to actually connect with him in any way. It's like talking to Cleverbot or something, but even more uncanny. It's really hard to describe. He started thanking me for being so nice to him and told me that I was his best friend.

I don't really know why I wrote all that out. I'm all choked up and completely forget what my point was. I hope he's doing alright. It was scarring to hear him describe to the police the things his aunt had done

>>9892700
Nice generalization bro, im sure you have a nuanced view of the world. Most schizophreniacs are totally normal, and you'd most likely not see their schizophrenia unless they told you.

>>9892725
>Nice generalization bro
Do you know what psychology is?

>>9892743
>outside of the novelty of their behavior and the possibility of studying them, they really aren't fun to talk to on a personal level.

Thats a generalization, and my statement was inherently psychological so your dumbass "question" is dumb

>>9892548
People know that horror movies aren't real but they sure as shit get done by the jump scares.

>>9892748
In order to even have a useful term like "schizophrenia" you need to make generalizations/abstractions. That's how language works. Your other option is a separate name for every individual's unique mental state, which would clearly be stupid

Unclear/confused thinking, reduced social engagement, reduced emotional expression, lack of desire to form relationships, alogia, deficiency in semantic processing, and inability to experience pleasure are all common symptoms of schizophrenics, and guess what, that can provide a very real struggle in trying to connect to or communicate with them.

>>9892548
The crucial and terrible part about schizophrenia isn't the hallucination, it's the inability to determine what is real and what isn't. If we see heat waves on the horizon, most of us know pretty well that those distant objects aren't actually wiggling around, they just appear to be. That mental realization is far harder for a schizophrenic to have

>>9892700
>Outside of the novelty of their behavior and the possibility of studying them, they really aren't fun to talk to on a personal level
I have a schizophrenic friend, and he's pretty normal when he isn't going through one of his episodes. Though he mostly has it together, there are people out there much more far gone than he is.

>>9892698
>it's great I'm just sad all the time
Sounds like you could use some meds, anon

>>9892782
That's a long winded way of saying everything said is useless anecdotes.

>>9892804
>he still believes that all generalizations are inherently bad
>he still believes that anecdotal evidence is never useful
>he thinks that widespread studies examining hundreds of patients and identifying recurring correlations and similarities qualifies as anecdotal

Wow. I'm honestly blown away. Don't you have a youtube comment section to be frequenting?

>>9892782
Clinical psychology keeps generalizations too a minimum, and adapts a purely pragmatic view where such generalizations have to be made. You making a blanket statement about all schizophrenics is the opposite of that. If you genuinely tired to be helpful and said something along the lines of "since schizophrenia is characterized by symptoms x, a lot of schizophrenics are hard to talk to because of x" that would be okay, and it would be factually true, but you didnt, you just went with the most lazy formulation of the problem possible, then you tried to justify it because "muh psychology muh symptomatic muh imprecise language"

My mother has very acute paranoid schizophrenia. I'm becoming more and more sure that i'm following in her disorder. It's hard for me to focus: I spent a lot of time dithering between trying to write and trying to read, typically just speed-browsing through 4chan and other social media sites instead, never really absorbing the information on the page as I am just glossing over things out of a sense of duty, like i'm obligated to be constantly doing something, instead of nothing. Moreover I sometimes feel a sense worse than apathy, akin to an inhuman motorization. I'll do things for no purpose, with no guiding reason other than to do so because I feel obliged to continue on for that very same drive. I don't want to be left alone with my thoughts. I fantasize about killing myself very much.

I've only heard a voice once, after hitting a dab for the first and only time (I used to smoke pretty regularly, but stopped because of anxiety revolving around the possibility of having this disorder) . It was an elderly man with a deep, gravelly voice. He accused me of being Jewish and having disgusting, rat-like Jewishness in me. He said that I needed to be purged of it. As far as I know i'm half Ukrainian, half Italian, though I've never had genetic testing, and i'm now more perturbed by Jewish memes on 4chan than I've ever been before. Come to think of it, most of my internal monologue is illogical, prescripts of what other people have said, so maybe I really am deep in it and i'm just late to be aware of that.

When I am clearheaded and reading though, it makes me feel calm and ordered.

>>9892811
If you're able, see a psych about it now while you can.

>>9892809
>"since schizophrenia is characterized by symptoms x, a lot of schizophrenics are hard to talk to because of x"
I don't see how I didn't do just that in my second paragraph

>"muh psychology muh symptomatic muh imprecise language"
You could have given me a fully formed reason why you don't think I handled my response well, but instead you just said that it was "lazy," which isn't very helpful without explanation, and then just put "muh" in front of a few different phrases and called it a day. You really want to tell me that I'm the lazy one here?

>>9892811
If you think you're prodrome go see a shrink dude

>>9892542

How all the choices you'd made, would drive you insane, I wish we never met.

Dance, dance, monkeys.

>>9892700
What had his aunt done?

>>9892961
Burned him, hit him, starved him, told him she was going to kill him and his mom if she ever saw him again

I'm schizo.

You wouldn't guess it though. I am on medication.

When I was off medication, I was quite wild. I felt like I was connecting but the feeling was not mutual.

Did not affect my ability to read in any meaningful way. Made me come to a bunch of incorrect conclusions about what I read though.

Since getting on medicine, I think mu tastes have changed slightly. I feel far older than my years these days...

If you feel you are going crazy: see a psychiatrist! The quicker you get on meds the less mental deterioration.

>>9892548
it's not like the sixth sense retard. its a disorganization in thinking.

>>9893079
good to here you're doing right bro. stay strong, stick to good friends and familia and remember there is literally no bullshit you aren't entitled to simply ignore or walk away from

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>>9892548
Try thinking about this for more than a minute next time before coming to a retarded conclusion. Here's a hint: Your dreams are usually completely nonsensical yet you also usually don't question it and just go along with them. Now imagine someone's brain does the same thing yours does while you're dreaming, except it does this while they're awake, and they don't question their impossible delusional self-narratives of what's going on around them for the same reason you don't question your own impossible dream plots. Because it has nothing to do with how clever you are and everything to do with whether your brain happens to be operating in a way where absurd shit is interpreted as credible.

>>9893332
based af

Would lucid dreaming be the anti-thesis to schizophrenia?

I'm schizoid and my grandmother was schizoaffective so I am at a higher risk of it.

>>9893374
not really. it's a distortion in perception. it's not like you're on some sort of adventure.

>>9893374
I think there's something to that. If you were able to cultivate such a strong sense of ongoing awareness to the point where you always recognize you're dreaming whenever you dream, then it'd seem reasonable to me to suppose you'd similarly be less susceptible to delusional thinking while awake. Awareness might be something you can train like a muscle. I don't think you can think your way out of delusions / schizophrenia (and counterintuitively, rational thinking seems to be the main tool delusions, both in dreaming and in mental illness, make use of to get you to believe in absurd things in the first place), but you might be able to get better at distancing yourself from mental chatter and recognizing it for what it is.

>>9893374
No.

>>9893374
>>9893424
That said I don't know of anyone who actually recognizes every single dream they have as a dream. Even people who practice lucid dreaming pretty seriously tend to only have instances of lucidity a limited amount of the time, like once every couple of weeks if they're really good at it.

>>9892811
HI anon. Please go see a psychiatrist/clinical psychologist and make those symptoms your bitch man. Good meds are a truly wonderful thing.

>>9892811
That's God telling you, as the representative of humanity to purge the rat-like Jews

>>9892548
>dude why don't depressed people just be happy lmao

>>9893424
>I don't think you can think your way out of delusions / schizophrenia

i agree. i also don't think being afflicted means one cannot be an intellectual. maybe not so much in a standard accelerated path, but just as much as being handicap doesn't always means one cannot attain some degree of sportsmanship whatever so be it.

>>9893450
also to add 2 cents, stay off the sauce and dabs or whatever you call it. self medication is all it is.

>>9893424
you're very insightful.

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>>9893479
>i also don't think being afflicted means one cannot be an intellectual
If anything I think schizophrenia is more often a problem of being *too* intellectual e.g. John Nash. Those split brain experiments show that the "interpreter" left brain is both the source of verbal / rational thought as well as the source of bizarre delusions where it'll make up any ridiculous story it can piece together to try to justify the conflicting information between the two split hemispheres. In a way you have to turn away from the world as it is and towards the world as you think it must be rationally in order to have delusions in the first place. Delusions in this sense are ultra-reasonable, it's just that the reasons in question happen to not have much to do with reality.

>>9892542
I have schizophrenia. I read only when I don't hear voices.

>>9892548
Hahahahahahahaha How The Fuck Is sSchizophrenia Real Hahahaha Nigga Just Walk Away From The Ghosts Like Nigga Close Your Eyes Haha

>>9892619
2

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>>9893424

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>>9893536
I've been avoiding schizophrenia for years by just assuming everyone I interact with is a hallucination.
>Anon, when are you going to stop playing video games and get a job?
>Heh, nice try hallucination-mom.

just in case you think schizophrenia isn't real. terry is one of /g/ memes. some people there actually use his software.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=TcqWok8AubE

>>9893569
kek i like you anon

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>>9893569

i wasn't ready to lol that hard. shit.

>>9893582
Fucking CIA niggers, thanks to based Terry for running them over

>>9893569
Under fucking rated

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I often hear multiple different voices in my head, about 50% of them lie and the other 50% tell the truth. Of what I can discern from my internal voices the ones that don't like can tune me into a feeling as if some event is about to happen. The really trippy part is when the voices cement their place in reality by seamlessly becoming ambient conversations on the street. I've meditated on this for about a year now and so far the conclusion I've reached is: God is insane, intelligence comes from God, therefore all intelligent beings are insane.

I feel that duality is the cause of the madness, that and maybe exististental loneliness.

>>9893536
:(

>>9892648
Isn't this the best???

I've been called it but I don't believe it myself, I think people are just being jealous and generally spiteful.

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>>9894754

>>9894777
when I say 'people' I mean random turds on 4 Chan.

>>9894754
>>9894780
Are they multiple, separate instances? I've never once been called a schizophrenic here.

>>9894785
Multiple, but I think all on the same board (here?) I rant on too many boards to remember what where when

I don't know why you're asking anything about any sort of mental problems whilst Americans may be awake or around. Everything is autism to them, or it simply doesn't exist. Or, it is as it is on television shows.

For God's sake, most people think because they like things to look neat they're OCD.

>>9892542
I have no diagnosis of any kind, but I certainly wouldn't think of myself as a "neurotypical" individual. I often find myself drawing a lot of connections, the problem is that these connections often turn out false, but thanks to their property of being plentiful; they are sometimes close to what one might consider "truth". Because of this I'm more inclined to believe these connections than I should be, the effect of this is primarily social. I find it incredibly hard to trust people outside a small number of friends that I've grown up with, and that--to the point of absurdity--can not form meaningful connections with new people. As far as I can tell I look like anyone else, men and women alike are often eager to strike a conversation with me, but I do not feel safe in these moments; and pray that they be kept either very short or strictly professional. It does not impact my reading, it provides an escape from these connections I draw in the real world; I feel at ease.

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>>9892542
Schizoaffective here
When I am in that schizo zone (hearing and seeing shit) I can barely read because letters are alien and have hidden messages in them. Words and letters take on different and often nefarious meanings.
>>9893374
I have found that lucid dreaming can be helpful in separating a state in which the brain is in control and when sensory input is in control. I was recommended lucid dreaming by one of my psychiatrists a few years ago when I had night terrors, it has helped a lot.

>>9894008
too many wild presumptions. why are you basing everything on wild unfounded presumptions?

>>9893901
>>9893790
>>9893778
>>9893569
Same faggot

What is one criterion separating the mentally ill from the healthy?

I have schizophrenia, in general no it doesn't impact my reading unless im in the ''schizo zone'' like>>9894933 said

My life is otherwise pretty miserable, i follow a routine to minimise stress to prevent me having an episode as much as possible.

on a side note are there any good depictions of schizophrenia in fiction?

>>9892548
lmao the amount of people getting aggro over this joke is embarrassing

I'm bipolar/schizoaffective/schizophrenic. First the diagnosis was schizophrenia but they think it might be bipolar instead. It does not affect me unless I go psychotic which has only happened twice. I have almost no hallucinations. But I have this going on:
>Words and letters take on different and often nefarious meanings.

During psychotic episodes I have sent a couple of emails declaring myself king, and calls for revolution. In another I wanted to change the world and become the Nietzschean overman.

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If im planning to write a book about the schizophrenic experience what books should I take inspiration from?

>>9892698
Everybody who'd find it difficult to read with ADHD would also find it difficult to read without it. ADHD makes it very hard to do things you don't like, but only has minor effects on things you do like.

>>9892700
Lars?

>>9892811
None of this sounds too serious. Many of my non-neurotic friends have heard voices while under the influence of various drugs, I don't think it's indicative of any further diagnosis. As for killing yourself, ;p cool I guess.
I suffer from both OCD and paranoid schizophrenia. I often see figures while driving home after school, only to look back and realize they weren't there. I can't go out at night without being subsumed by terrible anxiety. I often feel like cars are following me and I end up doing many laps around my neighborhood before going home. I lock all my doors multiple times and sleep with multiple flashlights and car keys in my bed (to sound an alarm if someone breaks in); I put tape over all my electronics and microphones when Im not using them; I cover my windows because I feel like my neighbors are watching me; I wrap bands around the bottoms of my pants and ends of my sleeves so bugs cant crawl in and bite my skin; I don't enjoy eating food made by people I don't know and often feel the need to puke it up after; etc, etc.
Studying is hard but it rewarding. It is my only escape. I do not wish to kill myself as my natural inclination leaves me desiring the consumption of history/philosophy/science.

Schizophrenia is an EGO problem. The aliens picked ME. The CIA are after ME. The chosen one to unveil the reptile people is ME. It's a retainment of the delusions of grandeur of children.

>>9896461
Yeah dude just turn your brain off u are thinkin too much hahaha silly schizos

>>9896468
I am correct. Exhibit A: >>9895606

>>9896482
Don't compare me to other schizos, I stand above them as you should now

>>9896494
>now
This should be know of course, stupid sounds

>>9895561
>minimise stress
cannot be overstated. learn not to give a fuck without being an asshole.

>>9892619
If I have people I know next to me I hear them having a conversation but none of them are actually speaking is this schizophrenia it mostly happens when a group tries to sleep in a room.

>>9896932
not him but i would say those are auditory hallucinations.

>>9892700
>It's like talking to Cleverbot or something, but even more uncanny.
I have a schizophrenic uncle, and this is a good description in my opinion. It's sad because sometimes he shows glimpses of the person he used to be, when talking about subjects he liked to study, but most of the time he's talking to himself and very often displaying heart-breaking anguish. Our greetings play out robotically, and it's hard to get a conversation going.
Honestly I'm worried something like that might happen to me some day, because there is no means for other people to connect or help them, aside from medication.

>>9896932
t. Charles Xavier

>>9894949
please demonstrate to me the foundation for your assumptions

>>9896932
sometimes your brain rearranges noise into patterns, sometimes those patterns are speech. This happens to me but only if there is an active noisy thing on and I hear the speech beforehand

>I go into shower, parents are speaking
>shower is going on and I think i'm detecting speech
>i get out and my parents have been silent for a while

>>9898561
>my parents have been silent for a while
How do you know?

>>9892542
i have bpd. doesnt affect my reading much. affects my personal relationships

>>9896075
>I lock all my doors multiple times and sleep with multiple flashlights and car keys in my bed (to sound an alarm if someone breaks in); I put tape over all my electronics and microphones when Im not using them; I cover my windows because I feel like my neighbors are watching me; I wrap bands around the bottoms of my pants and ends of my sleeves so bugs cant crawl in and bite my skin; I don't enjoy eating food made by people I don't know and often feel the need to puke it up after; etc, etc.
Fuck. That reminds me of the start of a Scanner Darkly. Sorry about your condition anon

>>9894949
They're not presumptions, I understand our creator as a childish being who willingly went to sleep to escape the reality of, being evil and being alone. God also has a massive fucking ego but why wouldn't you if you knew you were always right? In the mythologies of Christianity the Devil and God are the same entity and from the gnostic perspective the Demiurge exists but is the same entity as the Monad.

>>9898597
I've asked them before, or they went to do other activities almost right after i entered the shower despite me hearing them the whole way through.

Also, when i thought i was "hearing speech" I kept trying to make out what it was, but it would be like a series of tiny "flashes" that hit the right tones and frequences but didn't seem to make any actual sense. Almost as if some of shower sounds managed to hit the right frequencies for half a second and engage my "speech listening"

>>9892743
>stop generalizing!
>stop using concepts!
>stop using language!

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>>9892542
>How many here has schizophrenia?
Just schizoid.

>Does it affect your reading?
I feel like I'm above averagely skilled into escaping into fantasy worlds both of my own making and those of authors to the degree that I barely crave real life or even tend to prefer simulations.

>>9898659
Unironically this.

>>9892671

Not always.

>>9898682
>implying any of us are living "real life" in >2017
go deeper

>>9893439
Nah man I lucid dream at least 5 times a week

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>>9896075
Thank you very much anon for the Orr about studying, I too have really big difficulties while doing it but I never realized it also was so rewarding

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>>9895623
Read this Guy's work (watch his movies too)

>>9892542
Allegedly. Diagnosed and whatnot. Yeah its bad when I read at the moment. Sometimes it hasn't been and sometimes is been amazingly horrible.

Used to be the """ voices """ being really horrible but now it's the hallucinations or whatever and badness. It will pass I imagine. Usually does

>>9893079
How old are you and how long on the drugs?

>>9900480
that's more than just "allegedly" mate

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>>9900535
Almost certainly. But I agree with this anon actually >>9896461 I think one of the main things is the enforcement of the "interior life" So there's nothing to really do I guess. I can't really interact with people very well these days unless I'm comfortable around them. That takes a while. Also it can be insanely bad man. Like not able to anything but sit there and get slammed by it style of thing. So one day someone might see me and I'm normal then the other day I'm just a basket case. People can tend to not see you as a real person. They're surprised when they see you as a normal man.

When all that goes on it can lead you to obsess over it. So when you're alone all you can think of is what's happening with it. Completely self centred and unable to put it into context.

Could be worse.