>sitting in a train station in city of London, drinking coffee

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>sitting in a train station in city of London, drinking coffee at 11 pm
>seeing all the attractive people enjoying their lives
>can't even be bothered walking around outside to get the cathartic feeling of seeing Chads and Staceys at bars on a hot Friday night, definitively crushing my daytime delusions that arise due to seeing so many qts who are dressed as Chad bait at night and all have one night stands and 5000 tinder matches
>tfw aged 26, no social life for almost ten years, no female attention ever, only ever done stuff with escorts
>demoralised as fuck, blackpilled as fuck, nihilistic as fuck, see snake oil salesmen, stupid people, and charlatans as far as the eye can see, in all fields
>have no hobbies that have not morphed in to their own sort of work and drudgery (reading books - "Read these classic books", lift weights - am mentally held hostage and have to be tortured by seeing half naked Staceys exercising for Chad, learn programming- "Learn this way or you're dumb!")
>at this point I even procrastinate my hobbies - sitting and drinking coffee and riding the tube while reading on my phone is more enjoyable

What horrific drudgery. What a huge irony that I am the most relaxed at my government job, even though I became the ugly loner beta autist within two days.

And this is me standing at the edge of the Darwinian social game. If I ever talked to anyone or tried to join in, I would be humiliated due to my non chad looks and lack of social capital.

At this point, fuck society, it sees me as a disposable beta male to suck the life out of. I guess seeing people whine about student loans in the news is a great pleasure.