Creative Writing class

>that chick who kept writing about rape
>that autist who cared more about his fantasy magic systems than writing believable characters

The worst for me was those who would insist their mediocre lives were some inspiring struggle against adversity.

That and
>>9526015
>that chick who kept writing about rape

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>>9526015
>that autist who wrote a political allegory poorly disguised as a sci-fi tale
>that other autist who wrote a story about a creative writing class hating the first autist

That jock who is there for an English credit who wrote about all of the chicks he fucks and waking up with a sore dick from all the sex.

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>>9526060
>that other autist who wrote a story about a creative writing class hating the first autist

>the 90% of stories about lonely, awkward young men wandering around campus and pondering the universe and shit.

>the trans chick that only knows how to write about trans black shit.
>you feel like a racist for ripping it apart

>>9526311
Your jealousy in blinding.

>>9526311
Had a guy like this in undergrad poetry workshop. One time he wrote about being embarrassed by the size of his tiny dinghy while working at a yacht club and trying to hit on girls on the yacht. It was deep as fuck and he didnt even know it

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>that guy who wrote a children's story that everyone enjoyed for not being an edgy navel-gazing pity party
>tfw I was that guy


>>9526452
That sounds like some Updike shit. Good for him

>the traumatized international student who is only there to write thinly veiled war porn about the atrocities of whichever side he wasn't on
>the phase-lesbian who would be horrified to actually munch rug who writes thinly veiled recaps of her womyn's studies textbooks with characters added
>the coffee shop poet who is "experimenting with prose" but every sentence starts with "I."
>the guy in the ridiculous period fedora, the old big one, not a trilby, but like Indiana Jones' who writes really disturbing crime stories that make you imagine this guys personal life is really nothing you ever want to know about
>the J-school kid whose stories are thinly veiled accounts of IRL rumors about the Dean of [department] everyone wishes would drop out and go do this for real, because dude, we have to graduate from here.

>actually taking "Creative Writing" classes

Absolutely ayy lmao

I remember being really jaded because some of my English degree crossed over with Creative Writing and none of the Creative Writing students understood a single fucking lecture because they'd only ever read The Bell Jar.
Kind of feel sorry for them.

>the one guy who's an autist, like a literally autistic person, who always fucking yells when he talks because autistic people don't understand how to control their voice's volume

>The guy who wrote funny stories drenched in irony that were funny at the time but now cringeworthy to read
that guy was me

>unironically attending a creative writing class

l m a o

I remember my first creative writing class. A third of the stories ended with a suicide, I'm not even memeing.

>took a standard essay writing class in college.
>Prof pulls me aside and says I'm really good at writing.
>"Oh, thanks, I was actually thinking of taking your creative writing class next sem"
>Tells me not to bother, those classes are for people who obviously can't write. Says I should just keep continue writing on my own.

One of the best pieces of advices I ever got....I didn't follow it unfortunately, but years later I learned how great of advice it was.

>>9526625
I definitely learned more in an essay composition class than I ever did in creative writing. That professor was a hardass but it really tightened my writing

>that guy in a scarf, fake glasses and a beret who reads out such boring and long poems that the other people who wanted to read their pieces don't have time

>that fedoralord militant atheist who completely ripped off BioShock and didn't even bother changing things because he assumed nobody else was enlightened enough to have played it
Wasn't even in Creative Writing class with him, that shit just spread fast.

>that guy who is going way overboard with structural and theoretical points about his stories but whose prose is just utter shit

>that guy who insisted on writing in English even though it's his second language
"Afternoon ripened in the office." "He was perusing letters in the caramelising sunlight." "He intoxicated himself in the butterfly's every minuscule wingbeat." "He was wont to circumnavigate the fashionable cliques from the coast." "Time flew to a shudder."

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>>9525814
>took CW in high school
>one Argentinian guy always manages to write about soccer
>short stories: soccer
>children stories: about growing up with soccer
>screenplay assignment: struggling soccer team trying to make it to the "big match"
>slam poetry assignment: soccer
>eventually we have a field trip to a national arts museum, teacher instructs us to find a painting/piece to be inspired by and write a piece about it
>I find a portrait that I had only ever seen in history books and was in awe of the size and detail of it
>Argentinian guy finds Monet piece and write about how it would've been a good place to play soccer

because of him I literally hate the sport now.

I had one trailer trash dude in mine who must have took it because he thought it'd be an easy C-.

For all his assignments, he just wrote an excuse as to why he didn't complete the assignment. Sometimes the excuse would actually be longer in wordcount than was required of the assignment.

They were all pretty hilarious, because he'd give some dumb excuse, then start praising everyone else' assignments and how much he learned from them and how great it was that people shared their ideas like this.

We'd all get xerox'd copies of the assignments, and I started posting his all over the net, making fun of them. He found out about it and messaged me, saying he was going to kill me for this, but the dumb fuck didn't know exactly who I was so i just made fun of him even more.

He stopped showing up to class after that.

>>9526697

Sounds like a fun guy honestly. Was he good at soccer?

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>>9526697
>Argentinian guy finds Monet piece and write about how it would've been a good place to play soccer

>>9526694

Those are actually pretty decent examples of writing as far as creative writing classes go.

>>9526711
he was a midget

>>9526710
>I'm a coward who picks on people to feel better about my 110 IQ
More than a little pathetic

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>high school creative writing class
>that one autistic kid who eagerly shares his latest Danny Phantom/Kingdom Hearts crossover fan fic

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>he actually thinks writing isn't 100% talent

I know you we all like shitting on autists for reasons, but have you guys ever tried reading a story made by a literal autist kid (reffering to the ones that are definitely not apt for society for having development issues)?

Once I had the opportunity. It was a short story that was supposed to be based on "diary of a part-time indian" and it was the most bizarre thing I've ever read.

Everything fullcaps, no periods or commas , Goku was there at some point...

If I find the file, I might share it

>>9526788
I'm not sure what mental illness this is but...
https://drive.google.com/open?id=0B0aJnaOl7gykX0owX0g5Y0luV2s

>>9526788
Please god let this be real

>>9526810
If the thread doesn't die before I get home I'll post some extracts.

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>>9526809
my fucking god

>>9526809
>>9526788
his obsession with rocks is kinda disturbing otherwise he's just a little weird i'd say

>>9526845
i take it back this shit is something

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>the only black kid in the class literally wrote raps

>>9525814

has anyone ever even attempted an MFA in creative writing or is that taboo

i always thought it would be a waste of time because i would have to sacrifice my own creativity and become dead inside to finish it

>>9526788
>goku was there at some point

MY FUCKING SIIIIIIIDES

>its an amnesia story
>it's a thinly veiled political message with 'childish' characters to justify the nonsensical motives of the 'evil' establishment
>it's a bullied-girl story
>it's a first love romance story with a shitty twist that's obvious from the start
>its a muslims have it tough in the west story which ignores the fact they fuck kids and actively hate the culture they're trying to gain sympathy from
>its a reality is not all that it seems with a shock twist that leaves no room for character development story

I've done two high-level writing workshops. One a 400 level and one a 500 level. Out of about 50 stories (one class had each student produce two stories, while the other only needed one) about 15 or so were about homosexual relationships. A discomforting amount were about domestic issues, e.g. a wife and husband have marital problems, a brother and sister reunite after a long time apart, a sibling/child dies, etc. Those were maybe 30 out of 50. Other common topics included:

>fantasy coming-of-age with unnecessarily uncomfortable sexual scenes
>pieces that were written as though someone were trying to describe a television episode, products of a mind dulled by Hollywood
>absolutely labyrinthine garbage whose purpose was to make some existential claim, but forgot to actually make a claim and tried to cover by overusing thesaurus language
>phoned in dreck written the night before

Nearly everyone called themselves "authors", too. It was incredibly disheartening, and I feel I actually became a worse writer from sitting through those travesty classes. The only consolation was occasionally sharing a pained look with the professor.

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>Junior High
>We're writing short stories
>Look over at a paper on the teacher's desk
>It's a furry story about wolf characters

That's all I have.

>>9526060
>>9526403
>that other autist who wrote a story about a creative writing class hating the first autist

This guy was a hero for doing that.

I had a discussion with a friend after a particularly bad story. I was thinking about writing my own version of the story, but just doing everything about it better, more cleanly, and with artistry. Figured I'd have been failed or kicked out of the class for how mean-spirited it was, but still, great idea and I wish I'd given it a chance.

>that one guy who didn't say anything all semester
>one day the professor asks him what he thought about the story
>he just says "That was fucking terrible" and doesn't get called on again

>>9526732
>>9527203
Dunno about youguys, but in my high school we had to read these stories out loud. When I was up, I burst out laughing (definitely didn't mean to, it caught me by surprise and I couldn't stop) with how poorly written one piece was and the author ran out crying. I got a detention for that.

>>9526809
>And it was this case, when it came for the case of my Track and Field incident in 8th grade that ruined my opportunity to still go into track and field.
What was Sean's incident?

>>9527198
What were the good stories about?

>>9527209
BASED

>>9527310
One was about a girl trying to care for things, flowers, a fish, etc. and having them all die on her. It was very poignant, and beautifully written. The metaphors in it were small, but used to great effect.

Another was about the ruination of a small town by way of flooding, though the author was a bit up her own ass and the story itself veered too far into "literary fiction" as a genre.

There was another about an android who existed to work and had a subtle but enforced code of politeness ingrained within him. Eventually he stripped himself of flesh with his bare hands and boiled it on the stove. Pretty haunting.

Another was a take on cowboys that was reminiscent of McCarthy, but not derivative. I don't think the guy'd ever read him, even.

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>>9525814
>That guy who keeps insisting on writing believable characters
>That guy who keeps focusing on the characters conscious thoughts and feelings. because he believes it would greatly enhance a story: deepening characterization, increasing tension, and widening the scope of a story
I'm that Guy. Please kill me

>>9526694
Uhh its not rly that bad as far as flowery language goes, ive seen worse. Especially for ESL

>>9527362
Nothing wrong with either of these things, as long as you pay attention to other elements of writing too

>>9525814
>take CW in uni
>a little optimistic, hoping it will be a fun learning experience
>haven't really written before, but been interested in it for ages
>before first lecture, overhear someone say: 'oh, I got a short story published over the weekend'
>get depressed for having hopes and dreams while being a motivationless failure

But the course did turn out to be interesting. My stuff wasn't even bad compared to rhe others, imho.

>>9527450
>before first lecture, overhear someone saying they got published over the weekend
Don't worry about that. I had a fat black single mom in my CW class that apparently has a nonfiction book published. She didn't have any talent or literary knowledge at all. Being published isn't a signifier of talent these days.

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>>9526060
>that other autist who wrote a story about a creative writing class hating the first autist

you've just described the novel i'm writing

>>9526694
ESL are actually pretty interesting when it comes to creative pieces. Some guy from the Solomon Islands was in one of our classes, could not speak a coherent sentence in English, and his accent was too thick to understand, but he wrote a very good poem once, without even realizing it.

>>9527521
That's the thing, though, everyone there was ESL. I'm Norwegian, living in Norway.

>>9527481
>Don't worry about that.
I'm not. He apparently had attended already several courses on the topic from wherever he's an exchange student from. or sth. Also there's a lot of places to submit short fiction.
I just assumed that there would be only beginners.

>>9527528
He was doing the right thing then. Nobody's gonna read his shit if he writes it in Norwegian.

Although, there is the whole "master the basics" thing.

>>9527564

"Getting published" is a pretty vague and almost meaningless term. My brother isn't even a writer, and he's technically published in actual lit magazines. There's tons of ways a college student can get published that don't really add up to something.

If someone behind started bragging their stuff is going to be in the next Harper's or something, maybe then start worrying.

>>9526697
Because of him, I literally love the sport now.

>>9526719
A legit midget?

>>9526719
argentina best player is a midget
his nickname is "the flea"

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>guy writes a story from the perspective of God, for no reason
>the actual plot is just something he stole from the news
>the "flowery, lush" prose doesn't actually make sense half the time
I probably still have this story somewhere, if there's any interest.

>>9525814
>tfw when you wrote a MAGA story and everyone thought it was satire

>that girl who consistently fucks up basic spelling and grammar
>that girl who uses abbreviations like "lol" in a story
spoiler: they were the same girl.
>that guy who wrote about torturing a chihuahua to death
I'm sure you can guess who that was.
>that girl who pretty much submitted her diary desu
She was the only halfway competent writer in the class other than (arguably) myself.

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>>9528459
I know that feel

>>9528400
the mexicans are ruining this thread

>>9528489
>I'm sure you can guess who that was.
Geronimo Bosch?

>high school lit class
>supposed to be about plays but exam contains a surprise CW assignment
>teacher singles me out when discussing the exam, get a B because the rest of the exam was crap but she loved my short story, proceeds to read it to the class
plot twist: she had no clue about good writing so this felt more like an insult than a compliment

>>9529399
Did you mean Hieronymus Bosch? That's all Google is giving me. His shit's pretty cool.

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>>9526015
>that autist who cared more about his fantasy magic systems than writing believable characters

>>9527209
My hero.

>>9527333
The Android one sounds petty interesting.

>>9526311
that's fucking awesome also
>jock

>>9526735
>he doesn't bother trying to write because of the talent meme

>>9527362
At least you've got something going for you.

>>9528449
please

>>9527333
The Android one sounds cool

>freshman year of undergrad
>half of the semester was poetry, the other half fiction
>sit next to filthy film major kid who just transferred from New Mexico
>always wore this denim jacket with southwestern patterns on the back
>we start poetry unit with our black grad student instructor
>he turns in giant Ginsburg-inspired piece about slavemasters whipping slaves
>all I remember is 'nigger' and 'phantasmagoria' multiple times in poem
>kid gets pulled aside after class, but still stays enrolled
>fiction unit starts after midterms
>we're told we're writing "literary fiction" and instructor explains what he's looking for
>"So, basically, don't write some story about werewolves getting high all the time."
>kid turns in a survival-horror story about a virus that infects a small town, turning them into werewolves unless they maintain a certain level of THC in their system
>it actually wasn't half bad

I always wonder what happened to that guy. Never saw him around campus after that.

>>9526735
Ehh, the issue is more that TEACHING writing is much harder than learning it. To teach writing you have to basically kill the students' ego which is a big no-no in modern teaching practice, and most students become unreceptive to the idea that their work is shit because they aren't trying.

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>>9525814
>2012
>have creative writing class
>realize I don't actually want to write for a grade
>just go on 4chan, and steal stuff from other people
>turn some haikus and other poems I stole from 4chan posters into the poetry club
>mfw threads die and I never get caught plagiarizing
I even won the school's literary contest that year with entire passages from 4chan.

>>9531191
He's probably writing marvel movies.

Taking a creative writing course at uni at the moment and every week I feel my will to live dip a little bit.

>Have a guest lecturer that writes comics
>His work is assigned reading for that week, we look over it in class
>One of his comics is a gay dragon ball z fanfic
>It's assigned reading
>We actually spend fifty minutes analyzing it, but no one in the class has watched dragon ball z

I feel like every minute I spend in that class is time wasted, but its too late to drop it. I can feel my writing ability slipping along with my sanity.

>>9527198
>It was incredibly disheartening, and I feel I actually became a worse writer from sitting through those travesty classes.

Feel the exact same way about my class. Did you end up dropping it or what? I have no clue what to do.

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>take creative writing for fun
>teacher is a big hippy
>"all writing is good!"
>"let your stories play across the page :DD"
>class consists of several near stereotypes
>whatever, write some regular stuff and try pretty hard
>story time where we share our works
>black girl volunteers to get share first
>The first line will stick into my memory forever :"'My mother's such a fucking cunt' the nigger said, as he shot up more heroin"
>teacher looks enthralled
>"It's so vivid, excellent story-telling!"
>Things go on in this manner until it's my turn
>I'm not a good writer but I write pretty competently imo
>"umm it's, well, all right anon"
>things go on in this manner for most of the semester
>prof. doesn't tell me what to improve upon but keeps giving me high Cs or low Bs
>fuck it, decide to write the edgiest shit I can for the 'personal essay' section
>write about history of suicide and drug use in my extended family in the trashiest way I can muster
>decline to share it from embarrassment
>comes back an A
>mfw
>finish with a B and this shitty elective class kept me from getting a 4.0 gpa
>genuinely ruined my love of writing

>>9533229
bullshit

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>>9532475
>One of his comics is a gay dragon ball z fanfic
>We actually spend fifty minutes analyzing it, but no one in the class has watched dragon ball z

>>9533238
I honestly wish it was. I could go on about my classmates, but I am bad at greentext.

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>>9526060
>that autist who wrote a political allegory poorly disguised as a sci-fi tale
fuck

>>9533229
>teach a creative writing class
>understand that the best writing comes from real emotions, real experiences, not contrived situations
>"just let it out, be honest, let it play across the page"
>nice class
>girl volunteers to share first
>reads something she's written truly from the heart about something that has affected her
>"It's so vivid, excellent story-telling!"
>Things go on in this manner until the angry boy gets up
>he reads some mediocre attempt at "story writing" that clearly doesn't come from him
>try to be nice about it
>things go on in this manner for most of the semester
>hope he'll learn what I can't teach him
>he finally lets loose, writing honestly, putting his pent-up frustration into words
>he's too shy to read it out, but give him an A because he's seemingly making progress
>mfw he didn't understand

A fair amount in my old classes would only write about their first day in high school. Some of the most mundane literature that I've ever read has been written by those classes.

>that guy who likes Lovecraft far too much

>>9532440
Impressive, considering how shitty the texts shared here are.

>>9532440
Your loss, considering how little read Lit is

>>9528489
What did you write about?

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>>9529429
>Had no clue about good writing.
>Thought your story was good.

burgers have """creative writing""" in college? You get credit points for writing short stories? please be a bait thread

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>>9530777
Sorry about the wait. Please, uh, enjoy.
https://drive.google.com/file/d/0BzMrLTxaIACHT1M5a283OV8zNE0/view?usp=sharing

If I like the idea of a class where people produce and share their own work, but don't want to spend the money on a credit, how do you suggest to get a similar experience while in college? I like the idea of workshopping with others, and am down to critique and share my stuff and have painful fun if needed.

>>9535399
Have you tried just showing up? Sit in on the classes and share your work like any other student. If the teacher asks I would just say that I transferred in and the roster is still pending. Obviously consider using a fake name if you absolutely don't want to get in trouble, though I think the worst that can happen is that they'll eventually just ask you to leave. I doubt the teacher will care anyway because they're still getting paid for teaching the class.

On the first day of uni, we had to stand up and say our name and favourite writer.

Only me and another guy didn't say JK Rowling.

Guess which one of us is a published writer now.

>>9535658
I used to do this with advanced classes at school, because my grades weren't good enough to get me in them, eventually I was put on the register.

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>>9526809
>This autist manages to write 28 pages about finding and losing rocks
>I can't even write 1 page of the stories i envision
> Why even live

>that one kid where everything he wrote was morbid and overly violent
His writing wasn't bad, just overly predictable. That's really all I can recall besides most of the girls ranting about their ex-boyfriends in the poetry portion.

>>9531191
>kid turns in a survival-horror story about a virus that infects a small town, turning them into werewolves unless they maintain a certain level of THC in their system
lolled

Fucking love smartasses

>>9533229
>whatever, write some regular stuff and try pretty hard
It's because you tried too hard and cared too much lmao.

>>9526710
What did you write about? That guy's writing sounds pretty good.

>>9527333
i want to read the girl's and the android's desu

>>9526710
that sounds pretty meta
it sounds like he rused you

>>9535738
I mean when I was a kid I wrote 80 pages of absolute trash. I didn't really question if it was good or not and that's why I was able to do it.

>>9533229
>>9536096
I agree with this anon. You shouldn't have to try hard when writing. Unless you needed to make it on a certain topic you couldn't relate to, writing should be easy. You should enjoy writing. Just check grammar and stuff, but don't 'try hard' , okay?

Some of these are fucking golden

>>9526507

You just made the thread, I laughed bigly.

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>>9532440

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>that older woman who wrote about a black man dominating her protagonist sexually and then dropped out of class the day before her critique.

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>that guy ITT who never took a creative writing class but keeps writing anyways
<spoiler> is me </spoiler>

<spoiler> :( </spoiler>

>high school english
>everyone has to do a group presentation on huck finn
>best class overall gets icecream and pizza party
>pair with 2 pretty bro jock dudes
>tell them not to worry i'll just do the assignment
>for the presentation I draw a black stickman and a white stickman smoking cigs on a raft
>presentation day
>teacher obsessed with john wayne so I mention that he should have been in the book
>literally just start trying to say "nigger jim" as much as possible
>girl in front of class starts freaking out
>teacher says "now hold on now let him finish"
>"so yeah this book is about nigger jim and huck smoking cigarettes on a boat"
>few people start calling me racist bur I just say "no questions" amd return to my seat
>teacher walks up and writes 100% on the chalk board

;^]

>>9536450
This happened, I was there and I fucked the girl in the front of the class

>>9536292
I don't think this is accurate. The amount of effort you put in has nothing to do with the enjoyment you get out. For example, athletes at a professional and amateur level can both love the game they're playing. Is the guy playing among the top players in the world not having fun because he's trying to play his best?

>>9535389
top kek this is ridiculous

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Whats the best genre to write about to make money? Erotic fiction is already saturated and so is politics.. but I really need to pick something to write about.

I post regularly on another forum and I actually counted how much I was writing and it was staggering. Last night I wrote over 14k words in less than an hour which is about 15-20 pages of a novel and it occurred to me that I should put myself to work because im so used to typing.

I know that I should write about something that is interesting to me, but I was wondering if you guys had any suggestions for topics/genres that are currently selling a lot of books.

>>9536569
Invent your own brand of erotic fiction. Make it like Pez themed eroticism or whatever

>>9525814
>Creative Writing Group
>One guy only writes ~400 word long snippets about how much it sucks to be young and white
>Self-published a collection of like 150 of these fucking things
>Submit my story on google docs for editing
>He changes the font from Times New Roman to Calibri
>Leaves a note that says "This font is more aesthetically pleasing"
>I never go to another meeting

It pissed me off a lot more than it should of. Still gets to me from time to time.

>>9526486
Whats Updike?

>>9536580
Common mayynn.. one idea i had was just to make up a memoir about a heroin addict al la "a million little pieces" or whatever its called.

>>9536593
Yeah, that's dumb.

>>9536600
But why? I think it's stupid to but what is your reasoning, mine is probably different? Just doesnt appeal to you or?

>>9536585
not much you

>>9536560
Yeah, you're right. I guess there's a reason I have this name.

>>9536614

Idea has already been well covered, you show no signs whatsoever in your posts of being able to do it differently. Asking others what you should write is a pretty big tipoff you don't know what you're doing.

>>9536659
Yeah of course I dont know what I am doing, but that's why im asking. Obviously Im going to pick something eventually but I just thought I would ask in hopes someone responds with something that inspires me. I didnt say I was good at writing either, just that I have been typing a lot of volume on a regular basis. Your critical attitude is fair but what's the point? I havent paid any attention to what is selling on the market ever in my life but I figured it cannot hurt to ask because maybe there are some clear trends that someone else has noticed.

>>9536411
CW classes are garbage anyways aside from forcing you to sit down and write something.

>>9536690

Inspiration comes from within you, not out. Also usually comes from doing to, not just thinking.

>>9526583
I had hoped this was a meme, but then the first story we workshopped in 200 level was literally titled "Pain" and ended with the MC jumping off a cliff.
>>9526673
We had something similar in 300 level with some girl whose summer research grant was to study "disease narratives" (i.e. read zombie fics) while writing one. Brings it to class and it's a blatant transplant of The Last Of Us right down to literally calling them Clickers. She got offended when we described them in critique as zombies. It was a long semester.

Other notable incidents
>absolutely batshit story involving a guy finding a dragon caged in a warehouse; his reaction is "bullshit, this is the 21st century, there are no dragons"
>girl whose novel alternated between future girl on floating castle doing nothing and present day transboy in small town doing nothing, I think she generated 300 pages of this
>dude who wrote nothing but short stories about cyborg professional wrestlers
>guy who wrote very detailed story about girl cutting her thumb off chopping vegetables and her mom sewing it back on; proceeded to read it at the senior recital
>story about MC in love with spirit who then possesses a blowup doll and strangles him
>"erotic" poetry

>>9536704
Agree, but is there any current trends in the marketplace that would be valuable to pay attention to? I guess my end goal would be taking something that inspires me and then relating it to what is popular in the marketplace.

Im worried if I just start typing what I want to write about that other people wont be able to relate to it and that if I knew more about the current demand for books that I could have been more effective in my effort to make money.

I like writing for enjoyment and that's why I like writing lengthy forum posts but those are easy for me because they are about things that I am interested about or have experience in. I think the challenge is writing something you can bring to market, and that's why i thought it would be a good idea to ask here.

I guess simply Im asking what is popular in the marketplace right now?

>college creative writing course.
>First assignment was 1000 words, whatever we want basically.
>Guy brings in a 200 page screenplay he wrote.
>we're supposed to read our stories and comment
>dude is seriously pissed the professor won't accept his, even though she reasons it would take longer than the class to read it all.

>>9536740
don't worry about what's popular. You'll fail if you try to write what others have success in doing. Write what you're capable of writing, start from there.

>>9535725
JK Rowling

>>9535725
the other guy

>>9536450
stupid af but i laughed hard

>guy in my class is like five feet tall and wears a cape for some reason
>never emotes in any way
>all his works are literally incomprehensible smorgasbords of mangled references to memes and ironic jokes from the internet
>again he reads these out with zero intonation or sign of embarrassment
>one was literally just a five page spam advertisement for purple drank
>in play format
>professor and thus most of the class gobbles this shit up, praises him as a master absurdist
>some people even start imitating his works
>when asked questions he responds in non-sequiturs resembling his writing
>at lunch i see him sitting with some guy from another class and overhear their conversation from the next table
>it's literally just a nonstop stream of repetitive meme references
>it doesn't stop. the entire time i'm sat there it doesn't stop
>become so deeply horrified i drop out

>>9535399
most libraries have a writer's group that is open to all, though most of the members will be old ladies (not that it really matters since 90% of workshop participants anywhere will be shit)

>>9534404
I was the guy who wrote about the chihuahua. It wasn't a good story (the guy is just bitching about his girlfriend to this dog as he does the most sadistic shit I could think of) but my group's reaction was gold. I just sat there giggling like a retard while they said vaguely supportive things like "it was... Good. I didn't like it and it made me sick but it was... Good." One guy didn't say a word the entire time, he just stared at me with a pained frown. I wrote three other pieces for the class. One was just a story about gambling and loneliness, another was a prose poem about my ex that was bad poetry but okay prose. Can't remember the third.

>write a story where an older woman tries to rape a younger man
>professor goes on five minute lecture about how my sex scene wasn't sexy enough
>point out it was rape
>prof mumbles something like "oh okay" and we move on to the next workshop

Now, granted, I ended up reworking the story massively because there must have been something ambiguous, but I figured "she forced herself on him" and "he swallowed back vomit thinking about it" would perhaps clue into what was going on. Then again, this was also the story where a classmate spent her critique freaking out that the attempted rapist called the protagonist a fag for not being into it on account of it being a slur. Because even villains gotta be politically correct these days.

>>9535399
I run a small creative writing group on my campus. We only get about 7-10 attendees any given day, but it's a good way to get honest feedback and everyone involved is reasonably dedicated. Check the school's website for clubs. If there's nothing there, start one. (Insert Field of Dreams quote here.)

>>9536569
Don't write to make money. Write to write. The money will come.

Advice for everyone ITT:
Look at a CW class (or any non-invitation-only CW group) the way Edison looked at his lab. You're discovering thousands of ways *not* to make a lightbulb.

>every story shared involved a relative, usually a mother, being murdered
NYC is not a healthy place to grow up, I gathered.

>>9536858
>tfw you'll never have qt/lit/bf to meme with

>>9536569
literally just erotica for chicks, this is where the money is for type monkeys
If you have some self respect you'll write a novel on topics you enjoy without worrying about word count or money

>>9537296
>women can rape men
>writing about rape at all
Your prof was thinking you were just another socjus retard

>>9526452
WAnna read it

>>9535658
>Obviously consider using a fake name if you absolutely don't want to get in trouble

Wtf? You don't have to use a fake name. Just email the prof about auditing the course. Do you also recommend wearing groucho glasses and a trench coat?

>>9526809
What the actual fuck. Was this written by Maud Pie or something?

>>9536585
nothing much, yourself?

>that jewish kid who only wrote limericks
>that kid who was a typical "haha feelings are gay man" skater kid that was only there for arts credit and only talked to one person (who then moved away halfway through the year) but wrote a poem about his depression that was actually good
>those girls who wrote rupi kaur-tier poetry
>that kid who actually wrote really fucking well
>those muslim girls who wrote in broken english
>that kid who you would not expect to write a sappy love poem but did
>that girl who read great literature but wrote genre fiction instead
>that kid who knew his writing was mediocre but it was still lauded by everyone in the class including the teacher it was me

>>9540449
>that kid who knew his writing was mediocre but it was still lauded by everyone in the class including the teacher (it was me)

"STOP APPLAUDING. I AM TRASH. I AM LITERALLY TRASH. I AM TRASH INCARNATE, STOP APPLAUDING ME."

>tfw i was the guy who doesn't actually have any creativity

everything i wrote ended up being heavily influenced by whatever was the most recent thing i'd read

>>9540634
this
Everything I have ever written is entirely derivative of Melville or Conrad

>>9536858
everything about this confuses me, someone please write a story about this absolute madman

>>9540675
for me it was sinclair lewis
it mostly sucked but i had like 3 good sentences in each assignment
how do i get more creative

>>9540634

>tfw even though my writing is heavily derivative it still isn't any good

What the fuck

>>9527042
non-meme answer: I will be attempting an MFA because I like how workshops entice me to write. they are basically peer pressure. your point about sacrificing creativity seems prevalent. I had a professor who endorsed this view about workshops, but then again I think he was bitter that his poetry never made it big.

I often noticed points in my previous workshops where classmates or the professor told me what was good and bad in my writing but I simply disagreed with them. I don't think creativity can be stifled that easily. it simply isn't true that everyone in a workshop starts to sound the same. instead, people will try each other's rhetorical styles and devices. everyone's writing becomes more diverse. I will also go out on a limb and say that everyone's writing gets better because through the experimentation we're all learning what works and what doesn't.

i've never met an actual autist in a workshop, but i've come close. generally the level of writing is adequate-to-high. i was unironically on the high end in each workshop

>>9526710
Seems like a cool dude, while you seem like a pretentious pseud-booger.

>>9540449
>that girl who read great literature but wrote genre fiction instead
As someone who wrote pulpy sci-fi "beneath" my reading level, it might from realizing she didn't have anything to say that qualifies as literary at the moment and that trying to force it would just be embarrassing for everyone. At least with genre fiction you can focus on honing your prose and event-sequencing.

>>9533618
>understand that the best writing comes from real emotions, real experiences, not contrived situations

lost it

>>9535389

I'm one page in and this guy sounds like a total asshole.

>>9540449
But feelings ARE gay, man.

>>9535064
Your ignorance and polslang honestly convince me you're a man of small ideas and mediocrity. And at 18, "man" is pushing it.

>>9535658
Any worthwhile workshop has an application and a waitlist. It's not a lecture. Profs dont want ignorant fuckboys

>>9536740
Romance.

>>9526697
the catch is he hates soccer, and wants to rid of the world of it by distastefully writing about it.

>>9536726
>absolutely batshit story involving a guy finding a dragon caged in a warehouse; his reaction is "bullshit, this is the 21st century, there are no dragons"

This is genuinely hilarious to me, because it implies that he thinks dragons used to exist before the 21st century, but not anymore.

>>9541113
Glad I'm not the only person who caught that.

>>9536585
Not much, dyke, what's up with you?

>>9528459
You wrote atlas shrugged?

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>>9536756

>>9526809
We know this is your story OP. Own it.

>>9536404
>she now has 27 published bestsellers
>each one with a sweaty, muscular black man posing on the cover
>titled like "Escaped Slave to my Heart"
>tfw you are still posting on an anime imageboard while she lives the high life pandering to sexually repressed women

>>9536858
When a highway is built, the ant mound 20 meters away doesn't understand what the newfound rumbling and shaking is. They don't understand, but they know something has changed. Something above them, beyond their understanding.

That's the relationship between you and cape autist. He is ascended, you were the only one pleb enough not to recognize his greatness.

>>9534006
That's me. What should I do?

>>9541338
When, long ago, the gods created Earth
In Jove's fair image Man was shaped at birth.
The beasts for lesser parts were next designed;
Yet were they too remote from humankind.
To fill the gap, and join the rest to Man,
Th'Olympian host conceiv'd a clever plan.
A beast they wrought, in semi-human figure,
Filled it with vice, and called the thing a Nigger.

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I enjoyed my poetry classes, but my lower-level fiction classes were a clusterfuck of people who had no understanding of literature and just thought the class would be "easy." I actually saved some of the drafts I thought were funny, and I dug them out of my "important papers" cabinet for this thread.

Some borderline-illiterate girl wrote this story called "Platform Five," about a dystopian future in which people can pay to create artificial people, and some bitch named Karma uses the service to make a new boyfriend. She ends up "terminating" him because he's acting secretive, but then it turns out he was actually getting ready to propose to her, so Karma feels bad, but then she makes a new boyfriend and goes home with him instead. Some choice bits:

>Karma lived in Oak Park, a small yet beautiful suburb outside of Chicago. Her town was full of coffee shops, quirky bookstores, parks, and friendly people who said hello.
>She had spent the last two years composing a list of everything she wanted to make sure everything would be prefect. But everything was different now.
>Gabriella had recently died her hair pink.
>He talked to her about his dinner planes for the two of them that night at some fancy restraint.
>He had been increasingly distant and secretive, making secret phone calls, running off to make secret planes. The way he would look at her as if she were dumb, and that he had some grand peace of knowledge that she would never own.
>That was the day she decided not to waist her time with dating.
>"Justin it is then!" said the doctor, "That would be $10,000 dollars!"

Also, all the stuff at the beginning about townspeople voting on the weather (?) is never mentioned again or made relevant to the narrative, there's a precocious little shithead kid character, and all the minor characters' names (Gwen, Grace, Gabrielle) are easy to mix up since none of them have any personality traits.

The last lines of the story:

"Where are we going." Justin held Karma's hands tighter.

"Home love." She said as she walked him back to Platform Five.

>>9542561
>>Karma lived in Oak Park, a small yet beautiful suburb outside of Chicago. Her town was full of coffee shops, quirky bookstores, parks, and friendly people who said hello.
sounds like the beginning of a childrens novel, especially that last bit
Kind of reminds me of the hobbit in a way

>>9541345
Figure and Nigger don't even rhyme correctly, what a hack

>>9526697
Screencapped, this is just too good to let go.

>>9527012
in fairness, rap is a good form of expression and the vocal rhythm of the lyrical delivery can add poignancy and a sense of weight behind the content.

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>be in fiction writing course taught by semi-famous Nigerian novelist
>time to critique other people's stories
>they are all bad
>one girl in particular has trouble writing dialogue that makes sense
>guy tells her to change each character's dialogue to a different font
>mfw
>professor thankfully overhears and rushes to the table
>"No no no, don't do that!"

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>>9539572
Pack your bags and go home.

>>9542750
Maybe not in your plebby accent

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>that British chick who wrote stories about how disgusting and immature Americans are
>that guy who wrote a story that was pretty much the pilot for Dexter
>that guy who shared the first chapter of his novel that was basically Attack on Titan only with giant animals instead of people
>that quiet girl with bad acne who was actually good at writing dialogue but terrible at coming up with plots
>that football player who couldn't into basic grammar
>that morbidly obese girl who was obsessed with giving her poems weird colors and fonts, thus making her poems unreadable
>that guy who would never say anything bad about any girl's stories in hopes of getting laid
>that kid who wrote a thinly-veiled diatribe against Zionism who later let you borrow his copy of Fear & Loathing in Las Vegas
>those straight white kids who wrote about gay and minority issues for social justice points

>>9542750
Say it in an aristocratic colonial accent and you might be able to hear it.

>>9526015
>>that autist who cared more about his fantasy magic systems than writing believable characters
Brandon Sanderson?

>>9525814
>Those twins who each wrote a thinly veiled incest story

Good thread, boys.

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>>9542891
>that quiet girl with bad acne
Sounds like you had a crush on her.

>>9536726
>dude who wrote nothing but short stories about cyborg professional wrestlers

That´s sounds fucking awesome.

>>9540730
DMT

>>9542860
Which one? Those Nigerians really BTFO the rest of Africa with their literary output.

>>9542966
Hot. Genders?

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>>9539572
I'm glad you said it and not me.

>>9543106
Boy and girl

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>>9526697
South Americans are fucking nuts about soccer. So is everyone not from the US.
>mfw I go outside
>there's this two year old
>barely knows how to walk
>already kicking around a soccer ball
>see this constantly

>>9543051
No, she was pretty uggo. I read some of her stuff recently in a magazine, she's gotten way better.

>>9542860
Was that kid into Homosuck or something? Good grief, why are Americans so stupid?

>>9542561
She isn't wrong about Oak Park, it is like that.

>>9536552
She's disabled

>>9543235
soccer is life

>>9543158
Someone had to say it.

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>>9526015
>>that autist who cared more about his fantasy magic systems than writing believable characters
>THAT ISN'T ME
>THAT ISN'T ME
>THAT ISN'T ME

>Being in a community creative writing course
>The class is filled with womans in her 40's who likes to read
>A Mechanic guy who is actually pretty good
>A gay who writes misogynist stuff
>The autist who is shit on prose but good on poetry
>The teacher, a 50yo theater director who can't help but laugh at our shit
>Class is not bad, but we aren't doing shit, like publishing or something.

What do?

>writer's group is entirely women over 40
>piece chosen for reading is an autobiographical account of the sexual awakening of one
>repeatedly offer to leave on the grounds that she'd be uncomfortable with me reading it
>actually just hoping she'll say she wants me to go because what the fuck man

>>9544010
yeah
she got dicked so hard her legs don't work no more

> That guy who had to shoehorn his manga-like autistic universe in everething he wrote
He annoyed the teacher several time trying to discuss how things worked in his anime world
> That kid who learned the word "suppôt" two days ago and kept overusing it
> That kid who REALLY enjoyed the greek plays/epics and had to shoehorn his fairytales in everything he was asked to write
But that's ok because muh greeks, I guess.
> That friendly chad who gave constructive criticism
> Everyone else

>>9544511
Rather immature of you, anon.

>>9544494
I don't think the classes are the way you get published anon...

>>9526710
You suck anon.

>>9536569
>over 14k words in less than an hour

Bullshit

>Creative writing class
>Prof tells us not to gush about our feelings, because nobody gives a shit about our feelings
>Instantly becomes my favorite professor

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>>9525814
>tfw when i stole the plot from a twilight zone episode about ww2 soldiers and got an A for it

>pretty much every girl making their own lives out to be worse than everybody else's in an attempt to use false victimhood to gain pity and attention

>>9527198
Welcome to liberalized universities.

>>9545003
the fuck? That's one of the best known episodes. The one with the guy switching between being a Japanese soldier and an American, right?

>>9536726
>>story about MC in love with spirit who then possesses a blowup doll and strangles him

That's badass.

>>9536858
>>become so deeply horrified i drop out

Don't think this is the last you'll have to hear from him. I have a feeling we'll be memeing this guy in a few years.

>>9545159
>watch the pilot of In Treatment as a lesson in good exposition
>episode is about a couple going through pre-divorce marriage counseling trying to decide what to do with her pregnancy
>girl in class starts visibly freaking out
>has to excuse herself afterwards
>class silently asks each other if she had an abortion because what else would be that triggering
>find out later she was outside because the show implied a man is allowed to have have an opinion about his unborn child conceived with his spouse
Feels good to be free.

>>9542891
>that guy who shared the first chapter of his novel that was basically attack on titan only with giant animals instead of people
What the fuck. My brain refuses to even imagine what that would be like.

>>9526697
Argentinians are autistic for soccer for some reason
But honestly good for soccerbro at least he'd found what made him happy

>>9526722
t. The guy

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>that one balding autist who shared his furry fan-fiction to the class

"inspired" by real life mythology was it, Leonard, you fucking cunt? I don't remember the Greeks writing plays about a supersonic hedgehog forcefeeding female 'fox-kin'

>>9545364
I'm sure they were standard apex predators, but the mental image of giant deer eating humans is too good to pass up. It's not even implausible because deer have been known to kill and eat birds whole for the hell of it and for the calcium.

>>9527333
All of those sound good and I want to read them

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I had a very interesting class. Most of the people were actually very chill and genuinely wanted to better their prose. But then, but then there were the others. These two kids were Video Game Design majors. One of the kids was actually autistic and we found out because he was too young to take the class. So when we asked how he got in he responded, "Early class registration because I'm autistic."
Now this guy was the worse one so I'll start with the other. Besides frequently bringing up anime, Japan and talking about how he had been there, we also learned he was probably suicidally depressed. BECAUSE HE BROUGHT IT UP. Workshoping his story it turned out that this story about a crumbling romance that turned out to just be his WORD FOR WORD experience. We couldn't critque the story cause he would just go, "That's not how it happened." And then would talk about how sad he was. Super awkward for all of us.
The worst kid came in with the longest story we had to read in class and it was a travesty. A fantasy story that he apparently abridged for us to read, down from 20 pages. So if you critqued his work he would say, "Oh it made more sense in the full version." Fucking kill me. To add to that, his entire premise was a fucking meta-fiction "deconstruction" of the fantasy genre. That means naming characters things like Hiro, Henchie and so on. The entire story was about how the bad guys are really heroes because they create good guys through their struggles. A total of half the story is devoted to this twist to elaborate on how "Deconstructive it is".
So yeah, fuck that guy. Also the prose was terrible,

>>9526625
It's kinda funny that you never realise how good a piece of advice is if you actually follow it.

>>9532440
doesn't the /lit/ archive have them?

>>9544670
I don't believe it's immature to feel uncomfortable when suddenly faced with discussing the sexual awakening of an older woman, as the only one young or male in a group of strangers. I critiqued her as fairly as I could.

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>>9545429

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>>9540595
Yup.

>be in high school writing class
>turn in piece of choosing every other week
>every Wednesday class reads and critiques whatever work was turned in for the week in front of the whole class
>turning in feedback was a part of our grade. literally the only way to fail is not show up
>one semi-pretentious kid basks in positive comics every week
>doesn't bother writing feedback for anyone else
>any comment he shared was generally sarcastic and he thought he was funny as hell for it
>we all just stopped reading his shit

Freshman year playwriting class, you volunteered your work to be read (with different people reading parts and so on) and then critiqued. All of this is done cold, not even screened by the professor.
>dude asks for volunteers to read his play
>go for it, get role of some high school dropout
>story is about kid trying to study in spite of his asshole brother bringing his crew over
>seems typical, asshole brother calling kid a fag for reading
>crew talks big game about how horny they are for various women
>kind of getting into the role
>mfw my character suggests fucking the kid to deal with boner
>mfw crew agrees
>mfw playwright casually announces this is autobiographical and he was the kid

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>>9544062

>>9547390
Did you try to excuse your actual erection by claiming you're a method actor?

>>9536858
>five page spam advertisement for purple drank in play format
Please tell me you have a name or a title or something, I need to read this.

>>9545310
Agreed. I'd love to read that.

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>>9545246
damn straight

a quality of mercy was the name of the episode

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>>9525814
I had one of those in a poetry class.
>she wrote a poem to Anne fucking Frank
>one of her lines was literally
>"I KEEP HEARING THE NUMBERS BUT THE ONLY ONE I SEE IS SIX MILLION"
>my fucking face

>>9548337
Ahahahaha o boy

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>that guy who mistook another student's work for erotica
>that guy who said it was really hot
>it was me

>>9525814
>that black guy that never did the assignments, but got colourful praise for the odd bland piece he presented, and passed the class with a B.

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>high school creative writing class
>students are dumb as fucking bricks and only took it because they wanted to do nothing all class
>teacher replaces final exam with participation in a "lip dub" music video that the other autists want to do
Fuck you, Mr. Monahan, I'm glad you got fired.

>There's this guy who really thinks he's a really good writer
>poetry assignment: "uhm so i'm writing this kinda po-mo novel and this is a poem that could be written by my MC
>it's a shit prosaic "poem" about a girl in a coma. Basically all the poem is "boo hoo i wish you weren't in a coma"
>screenplay assignment: the autist wants to write a noir, but the detective is literally Friedrich Nietzsche and he has to investigate god's death. The screenplay is shit and all he did was changing the names from your run-of-the-mill noir detective story with names related to Nietzsche. Not fun, not witty, not smart

>>9536569
write some /d/ tier fetish stories

>>9548371

Don't you basically have to rape a kid in order to get fired as a teacher?

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>>9542561
>He had been increasingly distant and secretive, making secret phone calls, running off to make secret planes. The way he would look at her as if she were dumb, and that he had some grand peace of knowledge that she would never own.
>"Justin it is then!" said the doctor, "That would be $10,000 dollars!"
>Also, all the stuff at the beginning about townspeople voting on the weather (?) is never mentioned again or made relevant to the narrative

>>9548428
not really a teacher can curse a kid out and that usually is enough for to be fired

>first assignment is to write about your favorite fairy tale overnight
>It doesn't matter if it's a poem, play, or short story
>I bring in a 15 page short story
>most people bring in a one or two page work
And of the course the teacher brought it up in front of everyone.

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>>9548402
>the detective is literally Friedrich Nietzsche and he has to investigate god's death

>>9542750
What the fuck is your shit accent
They rhyme perfectly

>>9545342
Liberals man, I'm glad I'm done with that nonsense. We had one class where we had to debate ethical subjects, one girl chose abortion of course. One analogy she used was "What if somebody broke into your house, shouldn't you have the right to tell them to leave"? She was fervently against defending oneself though, especially with a firearm.

>>9548537
It depends entirely on the amount if time a teacher has been paying Union dues; the Teachers Union of America has standardized a "First In, Last Out" system where seniority outranks merit. The extension of tenure to primary education professionals is the core of this system.

>>9549010
He's a burger who says fig-yur

>>9549060
I'm an American
I say figure like that
And they still rhyme perfectly
Wtf are you talking about?

>>9544541
haha

>>9549070
Fig-yur and nig-ur don't rhyme perfectly. Try to say nig-yur.

Of course they rhyme perfectly if you're civilised and say fig-ur.

Not Creative Writing, because I never took that pleb shit, but a similar story

>be taking college level English my Senior year of highschool
>barely putting in effort because I was le edgy teen
>assignment to write Elizabethan Sonnets, fit XYZ meter and rhyme scene, etc
>to be performed in front of class
>day comes to perform sonnets. Don't have one
>performance split into 2 days due to length, get extra day to write my assignment because teacher is bro
>crap together some trite nonsense about my dog just to have something to turn in
>2nd day perform last after Starbucks drinking chihuahua-in-satchel homosexual
>he's the class tryhard, and his sonnets involve a bunch of erudite metaphysical allegories that fly over everyone's head
>in the middle of his reading I realize my rhyme scheme is completely wrong
>whatever, read it anyways, don't give a shit
>class somehow thinks it's incredibly good to the obvious dismay of the gay guy
>teacher either doesn't realize or ignores the rhyme scheme being off
I don't know whether to feel good or bad about shitting on special snowflakes through the power of procrastination.

>>9549077
Next are you gonna tell me bread and bed don't rhyme perfectly because of the r in bread?

>>9549077
This. It's a slant rhyme
Also
>Figger
>civilized

>>9549087
Rhyme is based on phonemes. "Ure" as in "Europe" and "Err" as in "Trigger" are not the same phoneme. Certain dialects of English drop the tongue retraction in words like "Figure" that distinguishes the two.

>>9537296
oh god, that professor makes me cringe

>tfw had to exchange research papers with foreign exchange Asian girl and write down critiques
>tfw she writes "Very good. Everything is on good path." on the front of my paper and got no constructive criticism

>>9549121
Thats asians for you, good luck getting a sliver of honest input if it means even a slight risk of unpoliteness

>tfw creative writing high school class
>leave assignment till last minute because I was a lazy fuck
>adapt the story of Fallout 1 into a few page summary
>get a 95 because I managed to take my own experiences and project them into a different environment

I wish i had a copy. It have no doubt it was probably awful.

>>9533618
yeah, im sure some random upper class negroid has close experience with heroin users you fucking nigger loving faggot