What's the purpose of a preface?

>>9141523
First impressions.

That's some nice boobs.

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I'd put my <<preface>> between those bulky tomes, if you know what I mean.

>>9141523
>fat ugly tits
>wearing a bikini in 2016/2017
>esp one that hideous
>ugly face
>terrible makeup job
>lol I'm biting my tongue and my eyebrows are raised so that means I'm just being silly and this selfie totally isn't vain or me trying to show off or anything

>>9141544
Feel better now? Probably not idiot

>>9141523

All I want is to hold a delicate heavenly female in my arms. I want her vulnerability to be penetrated by my rock hard erection.

Her squealing my name, "oh Geoffrey!" as I fuck the farts out of her tight little assholes. She continues screaming "Geoffrey, oh Geoffrey! Your cock is so big! Much bigger than my last boyfriend Tyrone."

Post coitus we begin talking about it, "What happened to Tyrone?"
"oh, he just kind of vaporized one day..."

>>9141523
Introducing and context for the tits of the book

>>9141591
Which flaw that I pointed out makes you the most mad? Or would you say everything as a whole is what upset you enough to convince you that you needed to let the whole world know how angry it made you?

>>9141623
youre the one taking out your virginal frustrations on a still picture

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>>9141523
It's PREparation... for the face!

>>9141642
Nonsense, my ex and I had sex thrice daily until I told her to cool her jets. I am simply schooling the children of /lit/ on how to spot a faux-"beauty". It will help not only them going forward, but the entire male race, and soon after, the female race whom whilst whist accordionly

>>9141698
adjust*

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>>9141523
"A preface explains the meaning, nature, history or importance of the text, preparing the reader to engage it in a resourceful rather than a dilatory manner, as Granville-Barker’s Prefaces to Shakespeare do. A preface should mean business, but it is not a reduction of its text to bite size. Usually, the works of dead authors get prefaces written by scholars. Imagine the hyena explaining to the jackal the finer qualities of what it is about to eat." -GASS

>>9141544
Wait, bikinis are obsolete? When did this happen?

>>9141544
>angry virgin: the post
You forgot to tell us about the innate female inferiority.

>>9141721
They've always been obsolete. They're the ultimate whore filter. If she wears a bikini, you'd better not try to flick the beanie

Also they're so tired from a fashion standpoint.

>>9141730
If only the world were so black and white and everyone fit in to your precious stereotypes and assumptions. See >>9141698

>>9141751
>he's a really angry virgin

someone post the "every day i see girls in OPs" pasta

>>9141523
I am sick and tired of this. Every day I come to /lit/, and every day there is at least one thread up with an OP image of an attractive woman dressed scantily and posing seductively. It's probably the same one or two people who do it honestly. Let me tell you something, you faggot pieces of shit who are doing this: you are the poster child for everything that is wrong in literature, art, and society as a whole today. You are incapable of coming up with anything creative, thought provoking, or of substance, and you lack even the smallest modicum of intelligence, so you use "style" and "flash" and pizazz in place of it and to draw attention to yourself, because that's the only way your SHIT "creation" and ideas would ever get seen by anyone. And before you say anything, this has NOTHING to do with the fact that I don't have a girlfriend. Anyway, I will be petitioning the owner of this website to ban your asses, so enjoy being able to post here while it lasts, because it's not going to last long, just like you that one time you convinced an obese girl to let you fuck her.

>>9141790
Angry Virgin II: Electric Bugaloo

>>9141793
Having pics of scantily dressed woman and using them to create threads on a literature board reeks of virginity to me.

>>9141642
>>9141730
>>9141769
>>9141793
>virgin
>virgin
>virgin
>virgin
So creative guys. Might it be you're protesting too much, and also white knighting a fake ugly vain ass bitch in the process? Meanwhile my girl is apparently annoyed that I'm responding to you because evidently typing causes me to slow down, as she just told me to put the phone down so I can pound harder and faster. She did get a laugh when I told her how you called me a virgin though so thanks for that. Well back to screwing my girl, I'll come back later. ;-)

>>9141793
>being so new that you don't recognize the freshest /lit/ pasta

go back, you fucking scum

>>9141790
Quite true and I agree

>>9141819
>it's a 14 year old angry virgin

>>9141819
>ill write my masturbation fantasy as if its real, that will show them i'm not a virgin

>>9141829
>if I keep saying it it'll be true. Pleeease let it be true. I need an external representation of my own virginity to lash out against to let out my frustrations and anger

>>9141851
See >>9141856

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>Buy some Shakespeare
>The preface and conclusion are both longer than the actual play

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Hey Faggots,
My name is John, and I hate every single one of you. All of you are fat, retarded, no-lifes who spend every second of their day looking at stupid ass pictures. You are everything bad in the world. Honestly, have any of you ever gotten any pussy? I mean, I guess it’s fun making fun of people because of your own insecurities, but you all take to a whole new level. This is even worse than jerking off to pictures on facebook.
Don’t be a stranger. Just hit me with your best shot. I’m pretty much perfect. I was captain of the football team, and starter on my basketball team. What sports do you play, other than “jack off to naked drawn Japanese people”? I also get straight A’s, and have a banging hot girlfriend (She just blew me; Shit was SO cash). You are all faggots who should just kill yourselves. Thanks for listening.
Pic Related: It’s me and my bitch

>>9141879
Man, it's been years since I've read this

>>9141863
>oh no, he replied after i made my snarky reply telling him i'm not a virgin even though i totally am. better post again.

>>9141523

i would press my face against those mammaries

>>9141544
>current year

gays must be eradicated

>>9141704
Didn't feel like fixing accordionly?

>>9141523
A preface is like those titties. It's not necessary but I find them a nice thing to start on.

what do breasts feel like?

>>9143040
Like bags of sand.

>>9143022
>not necessary

Try dating a flat girl once, it's awful, I feel like I'm fucking a kid.

>>9142277

This.

the dubloons don't lie

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>>9141698
What's faux about it?

>Big tits
>Is there any straight man besides Calvin Klein who gives a shit about fashion?
>pretty face
>I'll take your word for it
>How does this affect beauty one way or the other? She could be grimacing and still have the same physical characteristics.

>>9141698
>my ex and I had sex thrice daily

Shit that never happened.

Pro-tip: men who use the word "thrice" in casual discourse are, as a rule, incels.

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>>9142277
this

>>9141523
I almost always skip the intro/preface except if its a translated copy then I'd consider it.

>>9141523

Who is this memein demon?

>>9143453
Yes it did. You're just jealous. We went from three, to two, then finally one. We didn't see each other every day, just several times a week.

Maybe my mastery of the English language made me to not be an incel pal.

>>9143478
Angie Varona, welcome to the internet.

>>9141523

It is customary to preface a work with an explanation of the author's aim, why he wrote the book, and the relationship in which he believes it to stand to other earlier contemporary treatises on the same subject. In the case of a philosophical work, however, such an explanation seems not only superfluous but, in view of the nature of the subject-matter, even inappropriate and misleading.

>>9141540
I just want to hug her desu

>>9143616
>Angie Varona
God, can you imagine having to date this type of woman? Must be a nightmare.

>she's being bombarded with guys trying to fuck her 24/7 that you've to somehow make her stay away from
>which is impossibe since she loves the validation
>you'll be compared with all her rich, good looking, bick-dicked Chad ex-bfs
>you have to make her feel satisfied in bed somehow, being an average dude
>she's certainly a high maintenance, money draining girl
>sometimes you just want to have a nice conversation and relax but she doesn't drop her stupid phone and take selfies
>have to put up with her bimbo, slut friends that are going to try to convince her to go to clubs and bars

Might as well just ask my chubby neighbor out.

>>9143807
I just want to kiss her nose.
>>9141540
Please elaborate, fampai.

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Why is /lit/ taste in women so awful?

>>9141698
You better be trolling, nigga.

>>9143846
See that's true but those tits will justify all that bullshit to some guy, somewhere, so if you want a girl like that you have to play the game.

>>9143846
being straight is awful isn't it XD

To bore me into reading something else

>>9144114
>frenetic
I don't really like that word, I don't think I'll read the rest of your post :/

>>9144111
Not really, you just need to pick your battles. Much as i expect being gay is like.

>>9144083
I don't want my relationships to be some kind of stressful game, I want love and commitment.

>>9144025
taste is a spook my dear buddy

>>9144187
This looks like that bunny de la cruz bitch. God I hope that's not her. It has been a long time since I weakened myself enough to watch bbw porn

>>9144157
Yeah, that's cool, it's also why you can't compete for a girl who isn't really interested in those things.

>>9141745
>They're the ultimate whore filter.
Ah man, you'll be amazed when you start having sex/have you first girlfriend. By those standards all women are "whores", including classy, intelligent, educated women. In 2017 literally like 98% of the female population sends nude and/or posts them online (at least the ones that are even mildly attractive), and most girls are really submissive and into shit like being smacked/slapped/choked, BDSM, and/or "daddy" fetishes. That being said if you're honest with yourself you'd probably gladly engage in promiscuous activities and probably have some "kinky" or "perverted" sexual fetishes/fantasies.

That being said, I myself am really vanilla when it comes to sex. Just classic missionary-position vaginal sex is what I'm genuinely into... actually though I do have a soft spot for conventionally "slutty" girls, psychologically unstable girls (mostly self-esteem/confidence issues and/or depression), as well as teens (although I'd never date one since they're so annoying - of the three girlfriends I've had, each one has been 1-2 years older than me).

>>9144307
The last five girls I have been with like being choked, called me daddy, and were really submissive. Why can't I get some femdom now and then

Nice ressentiment lads

>>9144348
Dont be a bitch. Youre a man. Hold those women down and pound them.

>>9141544
please go talk to a women anon. She isn't doing anything wrong if she dont care about showing off, i dont care

>>9144403
It gets weary though, everytime you have sex it feels like you HAVE to perform, like a well oiled machine. It's stressful long term, you can never relax and enjoy.

>>9144450
It's that, the strain of being a fuckstud, and just the emptiness.
A great man once said: I'm in to havin sex, ain't in to making love. However, pounding a way at a human fleshlight is tedious. I want to feel like I'm having sex with someone, not just fucking banging out a hole. At least now and then.

>>9144462
50 Cent is not a great man

>>9144025
i wish more people played go. i've never met anyone who does and it has put a huge damper on my playing.

>>9144469
Can't even joke around here, oy vey.

>>9144471
Play with yourself, like you always have.