>When the Romans kill Socrates

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>>9098397
>When the Athenian court sentences Jesus to death

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>When the Americans exile Napoleon to Guantanamo

>>9098729
Yeah, but he got back. When he got sent to alcatraz, though...

Name a more noble man /lit/

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When Gabriel kicks Zoroaster out of Eden

>>9098754
Zeno Cicero Seneca Aurelius the younger

The greatest Epicurean philosopher to ever live.

>when Zarathustra kills Budda and Confucius sends him to walk the world alone forever
Damn... the Bhagavad Gida is harsh...

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>when Gatsby kills Lennie while he was chilling in the pool

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>When holden rapes phoebe

Fuck that book was brutal

>>9098845
not as bad as Daisy's Destruction desu

But Socrates was killed by Greeks.

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>when Macbeth and Hamlet plot against Othello

>>9099003
That was Archimedes, you pleb

>>9098754
Evola, Land, Bannon, Netanyahu, the list goes on...

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>>9099032
>Land

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When Pynchon bound his hand and hung himself.

>>9099038

That's Ted Cruz you fuckhead.

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>When Aristotle invaded Poland to kickoff World War 2

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>when Herostratus burnt the temple of Solomon

>>9098397
he lived to 70, would of been a foot in a grave back in those days

>>9099322
You just don't see this kind of craft anymore. I can tease out at least 3 subtle layers of bait here. Well done anon, I'm not being sarcastic.

>>9098397
>When the Judge rapes Holden in a nuthouse

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>when Lysistrata defeats the Athenian fleet at Aegospotami by commanding the Spartans not to let the Athenians ram and penetrate their hulls

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>>9098397
>When the Aztecs killed Joan of Arc.

>the part in ww2 when gavrilo princip assassinates the napoleon and places the first triumviratae of socrates, jesus and mohammad to rule over russia
wow

>that part where Machiavelli tels you about the art of war
(this sentence is actually correct)

>>9098754
That's the point, anon. Plato is creating the ultimate tragic hero in poetic fashion - the hero whose only flaw was he was too perfect.

>>9099336
>I'm not being sarcastic.
you mean "socratic"?

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>when humanity gets tired of God's shenanigans and floods heavens, drowning him

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>when Aristotle slaughtered Achilles

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>when Fernand Mondengo and Danglars plot against Vronski so that he never becomes a musketeer

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>When Gatsby takes over the Austro-Hungarian empire and earns the title of Great Gatsby

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>When Don Quixote gets nailed by Hamlet right after starting La Reconquista

>>9099416
>let the Athenians ram and penetrate their hulls
lewd

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When Galileo crashes the aristotelic plane with no survivors

>>9100391
lol that's a good one

>when lance armstrong discovers the moon

>>9099005
i would honestly pay to read a well read version of that going down.

>>9099006
No he's right, you fucking idiot

>>9098397
Delete this thread please

>>9098397

>when op made a worthwhile post

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>When Raskolnikov shoots the Arab

>>9102176
well well well if it isn't reddit

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>when Snape kills Dumbledore

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>When Mephistopheles comes for Sancho Panza's soul

>>9098397
>When pompey magnus was a consul of rome

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>when hanumat tears apart the peak of mount Gandamadana and carries it to Lanka

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>when pirate furiously pleasures his prostate with a banana

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>when Karl Ove made an Infinite Jest.

>When Apollo kills Brad Pitt via Legolas

>>9102731
>Not when Legolas kills Achilles

Though maybe i wouldn't have got the reference

>>9102654
I was waiting for this post!

>>9098397
They should have started with the Greeks

>when Harry stabs Kamala for sleeping with Demian

>>9098397
It's his own fault. He could've left but didn't want to be exiled. Also he was being a total dick during his hearing which didn't help his chances.

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>>9102228
>when The Underground Man starts throwing up

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>>9098397
>when Judge Holden rapes Holden and Huck Finn has a wank

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>when Diogenes tells Caesar to moon him

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>when Nabakov gets transported back to his PBR in the warm jungles of 'Nam

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>when Leonardo di Caprio gets raped by Timothy Treadwell and Grizzly Adams

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>>9102984
But the Roman did start with subjugating the Greeks.

>>9098754
Jordan Peterson

>>9098397
Good. Autistic people should learn manners.

>>9098754
solon

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>>9099005
>Macbeth's wife tells him to do it
>Hamlet hates Othello out of paranoia
>Othello thinks they're there to fuck Desdemona
Imagine the banter.

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>when Dante fucks Beatrice in the ass while Virgil is watching

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>when Queequeg fondles Ishmael's smooth, pink boi-cock with his big, rough hands, and makes Ishmael feel all funny in his drawers.

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>When Jason of Phyrae wins the 2016 U.S. Elections but the shadow aristocracy doesn't like it so they send a horde of brown manlets to assassinate him with butter knives carefully sharpened for 100's of hours.

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>when Pierre Menard denounces mirrors and fornication as equally abominable

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>When Lenin throws Stalin into the heart of the Death Star, saving Trotsky's life but fatally injuring himself

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>when a Connecticut Yankee just gives Cleopatra the nuclear bomb

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>When the twelve apostles stab Julius Caesar to death

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>When John the Baptist ate the knowledge apple and eradicated the borg once and for all

>>9099421
>>9099516
>>9100391
kek

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"when my post is just random enough to get upvoted"

>>9098754
Elliot rodger

>when the dog dies in the end