/lit/ humour thread

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>>9064851

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>>9064892

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>>9064900

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>>9064904

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>>9064911

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>>9064958

Is this the reddit general?

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>>9064966

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>>9064967
Don't insult my sense of humor ever again.

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>>9064971

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>>9064994

>>9064985
>61% for that trash
Too much, even if it's fake.

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>>9065000

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>>9065006

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>>9065010

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>>9065014

>>9064958
kek

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>>9065016

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>>9064893
retarded Big Bang Theory shit but can relate

>>9065000
extreme cringe

>>9065049
9.9/10

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my favorite

>>9065014
>white people in charge of fashion

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>>9065062
Please stop reminding me that this happened.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=sXvAd7COpJY

>>9064851
that's not socrates that's plato

>>9065126
Another victim

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>>9065044

>>9065060
holy fuck this is good

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>>9064851

>>9065060
loooooool

>>9065053
Sounds like an excerpt from Notes From the Underground.

>>9065062
this never gets old

>>9064904
This is gold

>>9065000
holy....I want more

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>>9065242
De Botton knows his audience well.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3SUWK_pWrbw&t

>>9065000
The second use of God should be capitalized because the person is speaking directly to a character called God. Fucking fedorafags

>>9065151
>tfw sperg on the verge of being asexual
>tfw I literally can't put myself in that guy's shoes

Why do they do that? Isn't it obvious that this approach is destined to failure? How hard is it to understand that if you know a girl for more than one year and she never responded romantically to a gift of yours then there's no chance?

It makes me so mad.

>>9065280
I guess you would have to debate him on that.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xjOTBaqNyCM

>>9065000
It's like Baskets

>>9065006
Wew

>>9065290
I'm not sure if I'm up for it. I mean, the guy doesn't pull any punches.

>>9065053
>I was dressed in one of my nice shirts
If he didn't actually do it I'd be convinced this was just 0/10 b8

/lit/ cringe thread

>>9065278
What a great enactment of /pol/

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>>9065428

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>>9065428
pleb

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>>9064851

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>>9065428

>>9065507
Meme trilogy future:
Bottom's Dream
Petersburg
The Sot-Weed Factor

>>9065523
Slow down, I don't think anyone has gotten through Rises yet.

embarrassing thread

>>9065603
embarrassing post

>>9065488
what the heck is this and why is it great?

>>9065627
I think it's a Joycean re-write of a really awful YA novel opening. Those threads are always great.

>>9064985
that teacher was a stick in the mud.

>>9064851
THATS FUCKING PLATO

>>9065621
embarrassing reply

>>9065603
This. And it's probably just 1 or 2 shitters, surely lit doesn't have this bad of a humor as the other thread before this one was decent.

And of course regarding the OP image >>9065745

>>9065053
eliot rodger. no question.

>>9065766
embarrassing reply

>>9065000
crinchy in so many ways but the sentence 'turning to ashes and crying out to that nonexistant god with our very last breath' stands out to me.
3 clichés in one part sentence and a chronologically impossible sequence: how can you cry out to god, assuming you have bno soal an there is nog god, when you are turning to ashes, which occurs only after you've died?

>>9065000
We've got a cognite in sector C37J, requesting backup.

>>9065775
spelling
<'assuming you have no soul and there is no god'

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>>9065775
It was probably me. I'm obviously posting too much literary humor for /lit/'s tastes. Maybe I took the wrong approach in posting funny pictures and should instead post retarded reply chains that are commonly circulated on /r/4chan. Here's a classic.

>>9065060
>"Like a beautiful flower that was opening and someone was pushing his dick inside it."

Oh my laughs.

>>9065818
meant to reply to
>>9065768

>>9064900
what is this from?

>>9065062
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=sPbjPOgRtyA

feelsbadman

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>>9065080

>>9065076
triggered as fuck

>>9065082
>cupness
Maybe it sounded better in Greek.

>>9065835
I think it was a clickhole article but I don't know what they're referencing.

>>9065280
Oh you've done it now!

>>9065783
Isnthat true tho?

>>9065934
This was... something.

>>9065796
Hemmingway kek.

>>9065014
someone should do a zadie in the corner at the party meme

>>9065062
>i want to be katie's little baby tampon boy

every fucking time

>>9065520
There's definitely a charm to that conniving Jewish character. I've somehow come to like him a lot.

>>9065934
you're underage if you find this funny.

>>9065934
I unironically think that this is a work of art. It deserves to be stamped in a museum.

>tfw no serious artist is this autistic
>tfw we won't ever have an autism-based international art movement

>>9066113
stfu

>>9064900
Fuckin spics
can't even stop illegal aliens in space

>>9065745
hook, line, and sinker.

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>>9065060
>entered her like she was a lottery
>galloping abs
wow

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>>9065062
never change, people

>>9065062
Still the greatest comedy of our times.

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>>9064971
lost.

>>9065745
Plato is Socrates

>>9066430
Lots of explosions in Dune, it would seem.

>>9065796
The Celine bit is exceptional

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Louis C.K. rolls on stage, his worm body hanging over his Ixian cart, crushes a stool with five-ton body. His face is somber.

>Fremen... I wanna be serious for a moment. I've got something I need to say.
*Crowd murmurs, some worried faces in the audience*
>My Hwi... my Hwi just gave birth to a healthy Harkonnen baby boy!
*Crowd erupts in cheers and applause, cries of "Congratulations!"*
>Nine months ago my wife was bred by a strong Harkonnen bull, and today I held the product of his virile seed in my indestructible arms. I couldn't have been more proud.
>But you know, when I was in the nursery, I looked around at the other babies too. And when I looked at the Atreides babies...
*Crowd begins to hiss and boo*
>I know how you feel, everyone. But when I looked at the Atreides babies, and more specifically the, uh, diaper area. I noticed that they all had...
*Crowd shouts in unison "LITTLE ATREIDES SANDTROUT!"*
>I couldn't believe how tiny those things were! I felt SORRY for the women who have had to put up with THAT for the past three millennia!
*Laughter*
>But when I looked down at the baby in my arms, I could see from one glance that he had a...
*Crowd shouts in unison "BIG HARKONNEN SANDWORM!"*
>I was like "Damn, this thing is bigger than me, and he's just a baby!" So much for "the golden path", huh?
*More laughter*
>I know one day he's gonna please a LOT of Atreides women unhappy with their husbands' tiny sandtrout, just like me!
*Cheers mix into the laughter, one Bene Gesserit shouts, "Me first, me first!"*
>Sorry, but there's already a hundred Face Dancers ahead of you on the list.
*Crowd "aw"s*
>Hey, you MIGHT be able to get to the top of the list... if you ride the worm of every Tleilaxu here, right now!
*Crowd explodes with excitement, chants of "SIAYNOQ!" and "Ride that Shai-Hulud!" erupt. The woman's husband cheers her on as she gets on her knees in front of the first Tleilaxu. The show ends as everyone watches the woman service Tleilaxu after Tleilaxu.*

>>9065242
That looks so tacky.

>>9066784
http://www.theschooloflife.com/shop/fashion/

Pick your poison.

>>9066166
cracks me up everytime

>>9065060
this is beauty

>>9067595
this doesn't make sense, corn came from the newfoundland.

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>>9067596
>Not knowing the meme that has been around since the start of this board

>>9065937
Lol

>>9065010
Fuckin kek'd

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>>9065014
>colonel sandals

>>9065226
Thanks, I was looking for a reason not read that.

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>>9065060
>fulfilled her sexual fulfillment

>>9065796
Fucking lost at Hemingway

>>9066430
Fucking savage.

>>9067615
Not funny

>>9065060
lol

>>9065058
if that anon ever published something i would buy it. That is incredilbe

>>9065076
?
i don't get it

>>9068410
He's ridiculing the Western Canon.

>>9065280
>see it on 4chan
lel this is bait
>see it on Reddit
FUCKING FEDORAFAGS

>>9068459
ah, i see

>>9065663
I'm pretty sure it's a literal passage from FW.

>>9064851
>Unironic reddit memes

/lit/ is dead

>>9068410
It's almost entirely wrong.

>>9068681
But how can you know it is not ironic?
Welcome to the post-truth era.

>>9065745
>he doesn't get that they're the same person
w e w

>>9065278
made it 30 seconds

>>9064893
>reading for plot

>>9065060
can someone post the painting in OP?

>>9069439
it's school of athens by raphael you dumb ass, google it.

>>9065082
I always loved based Diogenes

>>9064985
I'm laughing to hard during class to finish reading this

>>9065082
im genuinely pissed off that i will never be able to read his writings

>>9069576
*too

>>9065006
Kant agrees with Bill, so you can fuck off

>>9064985
Its been years since Ive laughed this hard. Holy shit.

>>9065934

this is so fucking terrible in the best of ways. the narrative is so fucking convoluted, and it's being told in rage memes. the best of these shitty rage comics have me in stitches every time

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>>9064985
>I WILL FUCKING KILL YOU, AND YES THIS IS A WRITTEN THREAT!

>>9064985

>don't worry, this doesn't make sense. it must have been introduced to explain the character's name

Sophocles BTFO

>>9066166
the best one

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>>9064985

>They were dumb Greek dudes, what did you expect an atomic bomb?

Holy shit

>>9069331
patrish

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James Joyce.

>>9064893
Spotted the YA reader

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>>9064900
Deport them both. God damn illegal aliens.

>>9065507
>tfw you've read all of these

>>9072655
How was Women & Men?

>>9072569
Why is some shitty Trump Twitter trolling '/lit/ humour'? Remove yourself from this board

>>9065934
Best of the thread

>>9065062
Gold

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>>9072681
its pretty funny

>>9064985
old and fake and gay
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=OCzxTzof_Pk

>>9073223
>worst term paper
>only 61%
His friend is way too soft. That paper would get a 0 at any respectable school.

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>>9064851
The bar was so low that the world limbo champion would not have made it under it, but goddamn if you didn't shoot into the gap with your shit tier humor.
>hehe not baited I did it for the (((you)))

test

>>9068459
how?

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>>9065286
Having been there, I can answer that.

It's because they're on their own too long using media. They become convinced that all they need to do to get a girlfriend to to be direct with signs of affection without ever confirming it (and risk facing outright rejection). Media portrays women as wanting the guy that comes along and does nice things for them, without drawing excessive attention to how attractive he also happens to be. For example, watch The Princess Bride. Men will focus on Wesley's deeds and talents , while women tend to focus on his good looks.
So in the Sperg's mind, he comes up with a formula:

Gifts+Proximity*frequency=Relationship

And with it, confirmation bias
>she must like me! We went to that concert together!
>We're really close. She gave me a hug after I gave her that necklace.
>I'm willing to listen to all her problems. I'm good for her.
What's really interesting though is that the presence of other boyfriends will not deter this.
>I must be something special! I've been with her through six guys

Women, on the other hand, tend to not outright reject a guy showing her affection, which fuels his fantasy and hopes. So we end up with a delusional man chasing after an uninterested woman.

>tl;dr see pic related
Also, if you stop masturbating so much, you begin to feel sexual urges again, and will stop calling yourself almost asexual. Also speaking from experience.

>>9065006
atheists BTFO

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>>9066166

I laughed but I feel I didn't actually get it. Anyone?

>>9065060
>suffered from dick Parkinson's
Fucking kek

>>9065060

i feel like the original HAD to be satire

>>9076005

pretty good quick rundown.

>>9076005
And what should be the right approach? I'm asking for a friend, of course.

>>9076658
Just nut up and be clear

>>9076658
>>9076680

Repeat this every day anon, its what the greeks would have wanted.

>>9076658
A little bit of >>9076680, and a good deal of stop caring what women think of you.

It sounds cliche, but it's real. Start focusing on improving yourself, gym, reading, learning. Make yourself interesting. Be passionate about something that doesn't signal autism (like your Japanese cartoons). It's like fishing; try to catch a fish in a lake with your bare hands. It's hard isn't it? Chasing after women is the same way. Use your personality and talents to bait your hook penis and feel the success.

I'm still a working-class sperg, so I only go out once every other week or so, but I get some chick's number about half the time. Picking up a hot waitress at a company outing feels real good.

>>9076599
is this post satire

>>>/tv/79214041

>>9065076
This is actually pretty good list.

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>>9066919
>anti-capitalism notebooks for sale

heh

>>9076968
de botton's not anti capitalist.

>>9076421
Does she really like C93?

>>9077362
at least she pretends to, she's even in an industrial band i think

>>9066717
I feel like this by now should have at least one (you), so here you go pal.

>>9077533
Thanks

does anyone have the 'homage to catalonia' comic?

>>9064851
I am sick and tired of this. Every day I come to /lit/, and every day there is at least one thread up with an OP image of an attractive old man dressed sharply and posing seductively. It's probably the same one or two people who do it honestly. Let me tell you something, you faggot pieces of shit who are doing this: you are the poster child for everything that is wrong in literature, art, and society as a whole today. You are incapable of coming up with anything creative, thought provoking, or of substance, and you lack even the smallest modicum of intelligence, so you use "style" and "class" and "respectability" in place of it and to draw attention to yourself, because that's the only way your SHIT "creation" and ideas would ever get seen by anyone. And before you say anything, this has NOTHING to do with the fact that I am an hormone addled teenager. Anyway, I will be petitioning the owner of this website to ban your asses, so enjoy being able to post here while it lasts, because it's not going to last long, just like you that one time you convinced your Old English teacher to let you fuck him.

>>9070471
Why?
Honest question, because I don't know if he wrote any work.

>>9079377
Stale pasta. Stale as in multiple threads right now stale.

Fuck off you're not funny.

r/ing the 'what i read what i expected what i got' with Knausgaard cleaning

>>9068681
4chan is dead

>>9065000
awful. just awful

>>9065006
Finally. Someone who gets it. The Pop-sci Kardashians are the worst.

>>9077135
No dude, I mean:
http://www.theschooloflife.com/shop/school-of-thought-notebooks-the-anti-capitalists/

>>9080330
pls

>>9065058
That is too good! Also, I'm pretty certain the second to last post is a modified Biblical psalm - though I'm uncertain which one.

>>9065076
What would the real list be? This seems pretty good to me. Then again, I hardly read fiction anymore - I prefer math, philo, and poetry.

Also, does anyone have a graphic for an Eastern Canon? I think I can imagine most of what would be on it, but I'm sure I can't have heard of all the most important Eastern literature.

>>9074021
>tfw the best one gets slept on
(you)

>>9076383
This one is too good. Expert level.

>>9066717
Lmao

>>9066166
plato on suicide watch.

>>9065151
She's a sociopath taking you for granted, leave her to die alone the second she gets old and can no longer manipulate weak men like you.

>>9076968
>capitalism = markets
>also implying you can escape capitalism if you are living under it

>>9064851
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=uQp5mRfT214

>>9072717
not really desu

>>9065796
Holy kek, Hemingway

>>9064893
DFW was right, irony is pain.

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>>9076005
>if you stop masturbating so much, you begin to feel sexual urges again
not true btw

>>9084550
Holy shit is it bad I actually like this comic?

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=sXvAd7COpJY

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2jpnLoBQgGw

>>9066717
Very good.

>>9065072
>Mishima, the Nobel-winning
kek

I like how none of these DFW pics were in the original thread

>>9065796
10/10
anyone got the archive link? I don't know how to find it

>>9087090
warosu.org/lit/

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>>9065000
This is bait you morons

>>9087273
No, It's Bateman. get it right.

>>9076421
>my fav director is jlg you may not have heard of him

top kek

>>9064985
>This foot is smaller than the last

>>9067595
this is just funny now because it was never funny and yet persisted to this day.

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>>9064994

>>9072655
yes, we do exist. Have you read Miss Mac?

>>9072673
supremely difficult, besides being incredibly dense, it's also extremely antagonistic towards its own meaning and meanders as as sort of mythos for a while.

If you have jstor access there's a little more here especially on the metonym fueled "excess" of the prose.

http://www.jstor.org/stable/pdf/1207862.pdf

I think the link is about his other novels Women and Men has more or less all the shades of McElroy mentioned.

>>9064985
>D-

>>9065796

oh christ hemingkek

>>9065049
underrated

>>9074021
What's a good answer to this?

>>9090902
class struggle

>>9065796
Oh hey, I did one of these. I didn't realize anyone had screencapped the thread.

>>9065049
This

>>9084555
>Holy shit is it bad I actually like this comic?
No, its bad that you wrote this

checked

>>9090721
How do you guys feel about existential comic?

>>9076421
>this beer tastes like piss
>it's not bad

kek

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>>9092880
It's obvious the author writes about whatever he/she last read about in class (or wikipedia) and generally only has a shallow understand of the philosophers featured. However, the author legit wants to introduce something of the philosophy of thinkers he/she deals with. So to compare it with Dead Philosophers in Heaven - the punchlines are often weaker, but commonly more directly related to the actual philosophy.

I think this comics saving grace compared to garbage like 8bit is that it's never gone far enough to actively flaunt it's ignorance on any one topic.

>>9066717
kekaroo
pretty mediocre tho desu

>>9065049
gold

>>9065058
Oh God, I remember that thread.

>>9066919
>"Emotional baggage" tote bag

To be honest that's pretty clever. Overpriced tho.

>>9092880
I have a professor that likes it, and know a younger student (we were in a class, and are now in a club together) that likes it.

I think they're terribly unfunny.

>>9092975
Can I save this?

>>9093424
it's yours my friend ;)

>>9064851
That's Plato though