Travesties of /lit/

this thread

oh I need to puke

>>9056163
Yes, thats how its making me feel too.

>>9056152
>Classics can be boring
>even with emojis

So they're admitting that their product is a failure?

>>9056152

probably more entertaining than the original

>>9056152
what the fuck

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>>9056152
>YOLO juliet

>>9056207
I'm no emoji expert but I'm pretty sure it's saying "even with all the heartbreak"

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>>9056152
Theres more.

>>9056152
>>9056203
I think you're trying to hard and have never read Shakespeare

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>>9056275

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>>9056279

>>9056276
>to
Go away.

>>9056279
>He probably hearts canoodling w/ u!
I chuckled

I mean, it's not made for existential 20 something who wanna kill themseleves. It's made for early teen girls, and makes the matieral accessible, so maybe in 10 years we will have harvested a batch of /lit/ cuties. 4d checkers baby.

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>>9056152
>Shakespeare
>Devoid of any wordplay or wit

I am genuinely outraged.

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>Pride and Prejudice
>Elizabeth is a Mail-order bride

>>9056273
Christ in heaven. I work at a bookstore and we stock these monstrosities. The Metamorphosis has a picture of Jeff Goldblum because of The Fly I guess, Dubliners has the cast of Reservoir Dogs and the blurb "Stuck in the Liffey with you"...it's fucking embarrassing. Haven't seen the Dorian Gray one though.

>>9057394
>Tolkien Fan
>Half the book covers are movie stills
Lean on me brother, and we shall soldier on past the attempts to make the classics 'presentable' to the masses

>>9056152

I'm not longer allowed at Barnes and Noble because I knocked this shit over.

>/lit/'s punching below its weight again
Shocking.

>>9057491
>Wanting to shop at an overpriced corporate retailer
>~$15 for a copy of Don Quixote
>Written 400 years ago

It's like the opposite of torrenting/piracy.
Honestly, you're better off without them. I've almost never had a pleasant experience there.

Also, their music section sucks.

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>>9056152

>>9056152
i read this as transvestites of /lit/
needless to say, i was confused.
oh silly me.

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Constance Garnett translations

>>9057534
It needed to be cut down t b h

>>9056276
literally everyone in an english speaking country has read and studied shakespeare

>>9056279
"He probably CANOODLING w/ u!"
What did he mean by this?

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I am mad

>>9056152

haahahahahahahahahahahaha

This is ridiculous.

It's not even an art form.

For christ sake, just read the cliff notes if you don't want to read the real thing.

>>9056152
Isn't this thread the equivalent of making fun of a handicapped child?

>>9056279
this makes me RAGE

>>9059402
Yeah. The handicapped kid in God Bless America.

>>9056273
the goose

>>9059415
is that his nickname? do people call him that? that's fantastic!

>>9057510
> there's no cost in the paper it's printed on, the distribution of it, and the time it sits on shelves not being sold

$15 is ridiculous but fucking come on now, you can't expect it for free in a store. If you want it free, download the PDF and print it off yourself.

>>9059427
Also big stores usually have their own translation, if they're stocking their own brand

>>9059394
Keehhhhgkkkkk

>>9056207
Each emoji is taking the place of a word. Probably love, heartbreak, laughter, and death. So, "drama"

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>>9057394

>>9059941
I didn't know 50s pulp was still a marketable aesthetic. I mean, I like it (if I hate the writing), but I didn't know that there was still a market for it. Is it just a phase, or is it still a thing?

>>9057495
underrated

>>9056279
This hurts to read

>>9057314
stay delusional

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>>9056152
>>9056271
>>9056273
>>9056275
>>9056279
>>9056304
>>9057350
>>9059941
Kill Burn Kill Burn Kill GORE die?

>>9056304
>#NoFilter
kek

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>>9057539
Agreed

>>9057350
...what?

>>9057350
welp, what the fuck is it with those mommies who think it's a good thing to rewrite classics as if they could improve them
'variation' my ass

>>9060952
Then what is it? There's nothing else it could be(that'd in be willing to believe)! It's just a marketing scheme so teachers assign a super retarded version of a classic to lazy readers? My point still stands. It's just marketing to teenagers? My point still stands. Tell me.

>>9061265
It's a bad argument to assume people are inclined to advance from easy content to difficult content.

>>9057639
How fucking retarded are you?

>>9061284
Ok, I mean I guess it's kind of an abomination to capitalize on these works.
Then how do we get kids into higher level matieral? I don't think most highschool kids can really read Shakespeare and understand it the first time through.

The fuckers who made this should go kill themselves.

>>9061359
If my professors had the ability to properly contextualize their lessons, I would have been better off. Kids and adults alike will only face challenging material if they know exactly why they are facing it and what they can get out of it.

The goal is understanding, and the method is powerful rhetoric / dialectic.

>>9057639

That's literally a flagrant misuse of the word literally.

>>9056152
lol did is the demonstration that god is dead

>>9059413
and now you're gonna remind me of that shitty movie

>>9061668
I liked it

>>9061359
i didn't read as a kid ( well, not exactly, but mostly). i started as an adolescent

>>9056152
wtf???!!!

>>9061672
well, you're a pleb who thinks is edgy and smart :^)

>>9061756
D:<

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>>9056271
>macbeth #killingit

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>>9056273
>>9057394
JESUS YOU WEREN'T FUCKING KIDDING

>>9062165
>Othello
>MR T

I don't see a problem with the emoji versions. I'd probably enjoy them because I could read them easily without getting stuck in 300 year old puns that no longer make sense.

>>9056152
this is good

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>>9062366
Run for your life senpai, cause if I catch you you're dead.

>>9062393
>Nothing is slang for vagina
>You have to go read some obscure footnote to know this
Yeah right. If I wanted a mze of footnotes I'd go read DFW

>>9056152
There's literally nothing with this and it is a mark of an advanced civilization to translate older works into the modern vernacular. Where is our Dante who is willing to write the next great epic in text speech?

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>>9056275
fucking kek

>>9056152
i agree with the other anon this is much better than the original anyways so who cares

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>>9059394

If you hate this you sure as fuck better hate the "translations" you read as a kid, too.

>>9062165
I've got that Frankenstein. I think those covers are actually pretty great, knowingly trashy like old movie posters

>>9063695

kekekekekekek

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>>9062165
HOLY SHIT

These are fucking hilarious

>>9057342
Especially since its the only thing hes got going for him

>>9062165
Fucking hell this is bad.