Write what's on your mind

>>8967385
when is it my turn for a gf

Im reading the quran rn and the female recitations audios really puts me in the arabic mood so i really feel the quran. But the book keeps repeating "god is most forgiving and merciful", gets old real quick. I also like to smoke weed and listen to arabic music and read quran, music really influences my mindset and how i approach and interpret the reading. I have class tmr at 9am and i didnt prepare for any of them but ill keep reading this quran and go to bed later. Btw im not muslim im just reading cause i smoked weed once and came to conclusion that if i read all the religious books of all major religions(there r 12) i would be able to see through religion. Maybe actually there are a lot of gods in god realm but they all (most)claim to be the sole god and the more followers they have the more powerful they become. Maybe the gods are just memeing humanity or maybe i smoked too much weed and im going crazy. But i plan to read the holy texts of the 12 major classical religions and come to a conclusion.

Why read literature? If things go into the canon if they have high artistic merit and impact on society why do some people here say a work has to "have a conversation" with [a work from] the canon? What does that even mean? Is it possible to even finish reading everything? Even finishing the Greeks would take years.

The greatest dichotomy of our time is between poultry and dairy. Egg and milk. Mayonnaise and cheese.

She wants do to butt stuff. I'm a happy man.

Literature is mainly empty entertainment. It doesn't really teach anything. You are better off studying STEM or creating your own philosophy through observation and instrospection.

>>8968764
You have been reading the wrong books then

>>8968765
Something practical, useful? No, DFW or Joyce don't teach anything.

Pondering over the perennial question:
To be,or not.

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Change is impossible. It is idealized, some immaculate conception of self, a lie against the jagged reality life is only the reactionary stagnation of equilibrium, that there is naught but the confluence of hunger and necessity, that we drift from one stream of influence into another, ever wayward with neither course nor abeyance. There is no change, only progress, a joke of inertia and the smallness of our estate.

>>8968859
...and then you posted an anime

Entropy

>>8968753
I wanna find a cute girl to pee on my face

>>8968889
What the hell!? I thought the exact samething.

>>8968889
>>8969092
>mongolian basket-weaving consortium

fucking flu

While helping some friends i might have fucked my life up big time, won' t have an answer until it's next week.
I have work to do and it feels like i am working in the last days before my execution.

>>8969209
>>8969209
>I have work to do and it feels like i am working in the last days before my execution.

Just another day at the office.

My dog is dying and I can only watch.

>tfw should have been a pair of ragged claws scuttling across the floors of silent seas

>>8967533
For your enjoyment and education.

>>8969613
You could kill it

>>8969080
Have you tried looking on the internet?

I want to write more but I have nothing worth saying. I keep spitting up pseud emo garbage and it drives me crazy. I think I try too hard to come up with something profound, and it ends up as the same tired bullshit.

>>8969660
you could kill yourself

damn Whiplash was a good movie. I wonder what happens after the ending.

>>8969172
loled

>>8969691
JK Simmons wins the Oscar and Miles "Scarface" Teller finally gets laid.

I made an ass of myself today. I was spending some time with a college friend of mine when some other guy joined us. Him and my friend really hit it off immediately, engaging in enthusiastic discussions about their (somewhat common) hobbies, and I just started feeling like the fifth wheel. I ended up trying to "win back" some attention by talking about creative projects I'll probably never even attempt, let alone finish. It was awkward and transparently attention-seeking, and now I feel embarrassed because I'm technically too old for this shit.

Plato is very archaic.

I'm a STEMfag tantalized by literature and philosophy, finally realizing that I'll never be truly happy with only one life.

I feel endlessly lonely with no one to relate to. Everyone else is smarter than me or just doesn't care about what I do.

>>8967385
"Whats on my mind, huh? " She laughed, curling her tongue in her mouth and making a puckered face, "Sure, if you think you can handle it;" she kept her sideways glance as small and sly as possible. Good. He hadn't noticed it - so the vision of his surprised, near choke of a reaction amused her greatly. Gave her good parts a jolt. She took a big gulp of whisky to help swallow her laugh.
And he was impressed by this too.
And he ordered them another.
They drank the second whikys in big gulps together, without word, but touching glasses and glances.
Then, she finally divulged, taking a deep breath: "I've been thinking about the trajectory of humanity, and my place in it. Haunted by my ideas... damn near torturing myself over how I'm not doing enough. How I need to try harder to make people understand the urgency of the situation!"

She wished he'd stop her - but looking up at his face, fully and without guile for the first time she was ashamed.
Ashamed she'd assumed it'd been a game to him.
Ashamed because he was genuine, and serious. He really wanted to know what she was thinking about... He cared because he cared about her, and had the means to make things happen.

So she made eye contact with the bartender, slowly nodding and continuing on, "I mean, humanity progressing and man becoming a multi-planetary species is what I want; more than anything; I am not suggesting we stay terrestrial! It's just... I do not trust that humanity will stay advanced once unleashed into space."
"How do you mean?"
"Tethering us on Earth we have governments, and taboos and ten thousand years of culture holding us to standards, and even still we're debatably...advanced." She laughed a bitter laugh, "we dance with despicable, and think its darling. Seriously, we have great ideas - and man has accomplished so much it fills my heart and really gets me excited about the future! The cosmos! I want to be alive when we find a way to implant new sensory organs, so I can experience it all! I'd love to look at you with ultra-violet vision, and to truly comprehend other dimensions or to experience time the way, say, a cicada does. Haha I mean - the next few generations of people are going to have a lot of power, a lot of technology and tools.... I just don't want them to be the cavemen we are today. " pounding her fist on the bar, "Christ we still watch football! The NFL and nuclear weapons should not exist in the same time! We should have advanced out of our brutality before building the bombs. We're risk the possibility of blowing our big, beautiful brains right out of existence!" She looked back at his face for the first time, aiming to catch her breath, but catching her breah in her throat instead.

Oh god, she'd done it. Ran her mouth - who knows what she said; she'd had so much to drink.... too much to drink, again.

>>8968764
>being this much of a utilitarian
kys >>>>>>>>>/reddit/

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>>8969613
If you were truly /lit/, you'd take your doggo behind your house and blow its brains out with your firearm.

>>8969660
Tried dating sites if that's what you mean, but haven't even gotten so much as a date off them, much less an opportunity to pop the piss question.

>>8967385
>Write what's on your mind

If I was able to effectively do this, I wouldn't be browsing 4Chan right now.

What's on yours?

>>8969899
>Gave her good parts a jolt

>>8969741
>realizing that I'll never be truly happy with only one life.
Sucks, don't it?

And life is lonely sometimes. People don't care because they're too busy being lonely too. Find a way to be happy without them.

I would like to be a great writer. I would like the things I write to be read a thousand years from now. This is what I want and it's what I tell people.

I don't think it's wrong to want this. Sometimes here on /lit/ people get upset at writers striving for greatness, as though in the striving they've lost the idea of writing for the joy of it.

I'm fully willing to admit that I might just be a wanker who wants legend and fame and fortune, but I really don't think I do. I do love to write. Writing brings me more joy than nearly anything. I adore writing. But I also want to make my writing genuinely well-remembered. I want people to read my writing.

I'm so lonely I'm thinking of turning gay for a while.

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>>8967385
Exploring the depths of electronic music right now. Kinda wish i could just do acid or shrooms and listen to music for hours while contemplating life desu.

>>8967388
I feel you, keep at it

>>8970233
i did this but i couldnt even get gay guys to like me desu

>>8970233
kys

>>8969741
Im in the same boat, but i have some relatable interests with my friends. Try becoming more diverse in your knowledge if you crave relation through it. That, or, stop comparing yourself with other people and make due with what you've got

>>8970741
I don't have the guts, plus time is running out really fast anyway and I'll soon be an old man.

>>8970736
That's a bummer.

>>8969899
Dubs of quality. Great narration, pulled me in.

i will never have time to study all the art science and literature i want

this saddens me

I am probably the oldest man on this board, and yet, you're the only people I talk to.

I love you weabs and pseuds and teenagers and those high schoolers that sneak into the board browsing and the inspiring writers.

I love you guys. I published a recent book of mine to you all. Hopefully some day, you will come across an italicized "anonymous" on a page in a classic.

>>8969740
That's his charm. Nihilism is so pervasive in contemporary culture. It's nice sometimes to entertain the notion that there is absolute Truth, Beauty, Goodness and that we'll unite with these Ideas in eternal Oneness, after our time here in this fragmented, confusing world of becoming.

>>8970916
Thanks pops. Love ya too.

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>>8967385
There's nothing interesting about reality, the only interesting things in the world are the people living in it; buildings derive their interestingness out of the creative activity of the architect. The universe is inherent reason, nothing can comprehend its dynamism but God, and because God is good he is continually comprehending it, hence we exist. We search for meaning, but will never find it, not because of some deficiency of the intellect or the senses -it's incorrect to say that humans are these good little creatures longing for noble things like meaning and not finding it- not because of some deficiency of the intellect or of the senses, but because we truly don't want it.
We are always awkwardly fixated, always in this cosmically uncomfortable posture because we can't let go of ourselves, and our dreams, yes, no matter how noble your dreams are you will never realize them, because you don't want to.
Two choices, either kill your dreams with your own hands, or wait for them to turn inward on you and devour your soul.
I'm not saying give up! There's a difference!
To die and thereby live is better than to live and thereby die!

one one one
who am I
who are you
touch the sky
kill the dew
who is to know
what we should do
despite we try
to go for you

I can't read
you fucking cunt
get out and go
and smoke a blunt

I will be going to university later this year, despite having never gone to high school and well into my 20's. The dean of admissions was keen on having a NM in Chess.
I wonder if my classmates will look down on me as my peers in Chess do.

>>8970922
Shut the fuck up, I will find you and murder your family. His charm? Fuck you, you talk like plato didn't personally believe the things he wrote, you have a hard time seeing past thinkers as human beings because you're an autistic epicurean who couldn't make a genuine study of literature if his life depended on it, the number of hours you spend playing video games dwarfs the time you spend on reading.

In my teens my parents never gave shit about taking me or giving me money to go the dentist and fixing my teeth even when I asked them to, my younger brat of a sister got braces immediately when she was 14.

i have become pathetic

fell in love with someone i see every day, and who i want to forget with every inch of my heart

listening to her laugh shoots through my heart, like when you learn of terrible news

can't be with her, but i can't avoid her either

my life is already pathetic and a horrible person, yet i feel selfish enough to desire affection from others

i think i have some sort of personality disorder. i am emotionally manipulative because i can't get people to care for me without doing it

i just want human connection and the thing called love that everyone talks about, but the way people conduct themselves in public is so horridly fake that it boggles me

i wouldn't even know what my regular personality is, i live up to a personality that i created

i have underdeveloped coping skills, and i have started to cut myself like an idiot

now i can't stop, and i hate myself even more for it because i know how fucking stupid it is

one day i will just cut deeper than i should

haven't seen dad since i was 9, wonder if he is alive right now, and what he is doing

im hoping donald trump puts up the wall solely so i can become a smuggler who reunites families as a jackal, and smuggles mexican/american goods across the border. ill have a steady line of work, and ill be able to provide for myself.

fingers crossed desu

>>8971222
>listening to her laugh shoots through my heart
>the thing called love that everyone talks about
>horridly fake
>boggles me

You must be 18+ to post here.

>>8971222
Don't feel sorry for yourself, you have every right to, but don't. You are in a tight spot, you don't want to change but you also don't want to remain how you are.
Personally I think the reason people don't want to change is because of the people they know; they feel like if they are going to be reborn then they aren't going to do it here, they want to do it some place where they know nobody.
But remember, no prophet is accepted in his hometown.
On another note, I know you love this girl, but know your prerogatives, if you can't have her then you move on, painful as it is, there are more perfect things out there.

>>8971295
i deserve my pain

>>8971373
Are you God now?
People don't belong to anybody, not even themselves, for you to decide your own worth is prideful. Self-deprecation isn't humility (not that you are trying to be humble), sometimes it's the opposite, and when it takes the form of suicide it becomes the worst kind of pride.

>>8967385
My Pride never did me any good!

When I say pride I mean it in a bad way.

>>8971438
what you said is part of why I am flawed. I recognize what my problems are yet I am incapable of fixing them, and I hate myself for that

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>>8971497
There's a reason for that, you don't want to destroy those things which are enshrined in your current set of habits.
You can't stay in the garden forever, if the chick doesn't crack its shell it dies.
It's like this, in life all your hopes and dreams are always right in front of you, always close in your thoughts, but the only way to obtain them is to turn around and go in the opposite direction, it's absurd, so we don't do it, years go by and you are still there looking at your dreams, maybe even content just to relish in the possibility of obtaining them, but more time goes by and the world gets in the way of this simple pleasure, and eventually it all turns sour, you begin to realize time is running out, do you do the absurd or keep hoping?

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Nirvana is the lowliest of temptations. Abnegation of the self is but enlightenment through bankruptcy. To meet the surfeit of life's duty and difficulty with a living suicide. The Buddha was a derelict, his divine soul a squatter. Better to die in truth than to deaden truth's sting. Better still to conquer, to master and mold the world, to strive and fulfill the passions, to find what heights may be. Anything less is surrender or failure. Surrender being the least of them..

real g's move in silence like lasagna

>>8971438
>people shouldn't be allowed to kill themselves
The modern man has no dignity.

>>8969741
There are people who envy your loneliness and sense of condemnation. I feel nothing but a constant and vague sense of weariness.

>'Don't despair, not even over the fact you don't despair.'
>t. Kefkaesque-man

>>8969672
take a commercial idea like vampires (bad example I know) and make it your own

>>8969672
Co-opt someone else's work. Make a modern version of a classic with vampires or some shit like
>>8971814
suggests. You can call it post modern or something.

Most of the shit you guys posted in this thread is super gay. Do better in 2017.

>>8967385
Only one enemy left; Two If you counted god.

>>8971886
the one enemy left is you?

>>8967385
my gf just walked out on me, we have a 9 month old together and she said she cannot take it anymore.
She has been in a depressive spiral since the birth, I have tried everything to make her happy and nothing has worked.
She wants nothing to do with our daughter, it's sad as she was so looking forward to being a mother. In a way I am relieved as I can now concentrate all my efforts on my little one instead of having to split it and feel like I am not doing a good enough job on two fronts.

>>8971903
its a man's duty to keep moving forward, its just how it is

good luck friend

Nothing matters

>>8971931
See
>>8971746

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>>8971135
Why are you so angry lol? Calm down. I didn't mean to imply that Plato didn't believe the things he wrote, but rather I was acknowledging the post saying he was archaic, and because of that there is a sense in which his philosophy seems untenable, albeit captivating, today.

Also, I haven't played video games in about a decade.

>>8971127
Ignore them, age is irrelevant for uni.

SEE WHO GIVE A FUCK
dun-dun-dun DUNNUNUN
dun-dun-dun DEE-dunnun
-RUN-dun-dun RUP-dup-dup
DO-RUP-dum-DUM-dum-dum

>>8971717
The trick about hopes and dreams is to break them down into objectively attainable stepping stones. But with art for instance, if you lack talent, your dreams will never come true.

The guy seeding The Screaming Skull (1958) waited until we were all at 93.86% then left. I really don't want to spend $5 on a dvd plus $40 for shipping.

>>8972009
art and talent are both tied down to subjectivity, I presume you know this?

to say your dreams wont come true if you lack talent is absurd

I'm not fit for this world

I want to know if "my myriad life problems" is correct usage, or if I need an "of" in there.

Straight guys can have gay friends, even when the gay friends know you're straight, right?

>>8972223
they'll still see you as a piece of meat

I have found genuine blissful equanimity in solitude and the renunciation of vices, thanks to the meme of Christian virtue.

But now an attractive 17 year old (legal) girl has asked me out and my body yearns to penetrate and fill her with semen. The urge is easy enough to cast off, but temptation is insidious, and continuously spins into my rational thought, finding false reasons to justify itself.

Why must the body conspire against us? I will not lose my happiness.

>>8972299
please start your story from the beginning

PLEASE

Fuck im horny af

Why do people seem so stupid? No one can argue. No one seems to think critically anymore. It's annoying to see and I know I am not even very smart but the depths at which I see people are disheartening.

>>8967385
"Do you really think I'm not helping you because I don't want to? I mean, after everyhing you know about me and after everything you have seen about my actions... do you really think I'm not helping you to screw you? No! I'm not helping you because I'm scared and I'm very nervious to come out in the next scene, I obviously can not help you to change the rest of the actors. I really, really want to help you because I know how important is to you to show your vestry in excellent conditions, but right now, I can not think in that... so, don't get angry with me, get angry with your loved actor who wanted to get nose surgery instead of be part of the audition".

>>8967385
I may have saved someone very important to me last night.
The accident was a fluke - I just happened to be there at the moment, had I been upstairs or outside or at the store, I probably would have come home to a dead man.

And, as much as I hate my personality sometimes; and for all of my flaws: the laziness, habituated pot smoking, the way I pick apart every tv show and movie and talk through the whole show, even though I know it annoys him, or whatever flaws I hate in my self, there is one aspect of my personality that makes all the others worth it: I am someone you want to have around in an emergency.

I just respond well in emergency situations. I have had some training, yes, (having worked for very wealthy families in the past, even their maids learn cpr and how to put out a fire) but I've also been exposed to numerous emergency situations, and, this asset must be something deep seated - something genetic - because it is something I have no control over. I just jump to action - respond. Do what I can.

And last night, as my love's head hit the table, and he stopped breathing - I was able to help him.
And I can't get the image of his purple face out of my head. Or his eyes as they rolled around slowly, before coming back to look at me - but he wasn't there behind them.
... man. This is real. This really did happen last night. And it is hard to write about because I don't want to mince words, or edit my sentences in fear of dramatizing it... this near tragedy is too near to make an appearance in my fictions.
And too personal to expose fully to 4chan but I thank /lit anyway, for being around. Even when you suck, you're special, and I love you.

>>8972625
I get you man, i am really shallow but sometimes i catch myself seeing what you see.
Its just life everybody is doing their own thing, because they can.
I want to get wiser but when its time to actually read something or work on it i flake :(
I think the important thing is to just keep an open mind the rest will probably sort itself out

I'm glad to be working at a small local business. The work isn't too bad even when it's very busy, and when nobody is in the restaurant I can sit out in the lobby and shitpost.

I have had negative experience with girls throughout my preteen and teen years so I have no confidence around them. I'm still attracted to them and want love but I can't see myself ever having a gf. The problem is I started fapping to gay porn(stories and straight bj vids , audio m4m and discords) recently. For the past couple of years it was the occasional trap and shemale. I'm not blaming it on 4chan but it did "awaken" a thirst so to speak.

I think what's happening is that I know that it's much more easier just to find a sexual partners with men than with women. I've never had a gf so I'm khv. And starting to prefer the thought of having sex with a man because it's much more realistic. And that I'm just setting myself up for disappointment to fap to straight porn.

The idea of hooking up is becoming more ... acceptable to me. The sub Dom aspect of the act. But I'm not at all (except for cock when I'm horny) attracted to males. I'm certain of it. I don't pretend I'm straight but I don't think im bi if I can't see a relationship with a dude and not attracted to masculine features. I am into femdom. But its more realistic than a gf and I could pretend.

It's either stay a virgin, get an escort(I find them a rip off tho) or grindr. I fear that if I go the grindr route it will be a life of promiscuity , aids and guilt. If I go the escort route I'll be broke. And I'll kms eventually if I stay a virgin.

It's not the social stigma it's just idk. Just the thought of being single for the rest of my life depresses the fuck outta me. I can't lie to myself anymore. I've been watching asmr roleplay vids and listening to audio of girls saying they love me.

I just fapped.immediatley after I felt sad and lonely. I'm now listening to sad classical music.

Getting fat again lads

>>8971763
Suicide is punishable by life.

>>8972035
No, he's right, to create art or indeed anything valuable you have to subordinate your creative impulses to the construction of a form.
Inspiration is worth nothing, what matters is structural integrity, anything which comes out as inspiring to others is in possession of a shape and form which is proper to it, if you can't dedicate yourself to creating such a form then nothing you create will be inspiring or passionate or what ever.

Simply put I often become overwhelmed and anxious-ridden by the infinitude of human knowledge despite that I often find joy in it as well. I enjoy the cultivation of both mind and body more than the interaction of other humans for prolonged periods of time.

My relationships last in a flurry and I have a melancholia and contradicting, inasmuch as I want a lasting relationship I do not, viewpoint about finding my dialectical counterpart in this world.

Actually this was a great exercise for me and spurred a lot of stream of consciousness responses that I tabled for my own writings down the road but that was the sum of what I was wanting to say.

Everything bad that's happened on Earth can ultimately be attributed to a pair of fuckwads deciding to have children.

>>8971969
>untenable
>doesn't realize quantum physics is beginning to line up with some of Plato's metaphysics

Boobs

People in small towns are really petty.

I need to get Emilia Clarke's eyes to become purple using GIMP 2.8 without a causing a ridiculous increase in the image size.

>>8972705
:)
It's the little things.

>>8972916
You'll be fine. Sex isn't ao... binary.

I would be fine having sex with a woman, or the thought sometimes turns me on, but other times grosses me out....
But I could never be in a romantic relationship with one. I like the differences between the genders too much.

Don't rush your life. I get being horny, and wanting to fuck, but dont feel like you need to label yourself or set some many ultimatums on b your sexuality.

>>8972916
Post the piece you're listening to.

>>8967385
My mind feels like a bunch of white noise. I have a ton of thoughts going on at once which each take up a respective 5% of my attention at the same time.

The sides of my brain feel bright if that makes sense; I really fucking hate it. There's no peace.

This is why I fucking love sleeping

I can't stop sleeping 10 hours every night. I slept only 8 last night and I'm feeling foggy. Haven't eating that much either, or rather I haven't been that hungry lately. I'm really dehydrated and I can't stop drinking coffee and black tea and pissing it out every half hour. I've had to start using piss bottles because going to toilet that frequently is exhausting.

the ability to effectively communicate determines ones functionality in human society no matter what level of intelligence you may have

>>8973691
Have you gone to a doctor, Senpai? You sound like you're displaying symptoms of some illness

>>8973700
I'm considering it if these symptoms persist for a few more days.

>>8973691
I can relate to this.
But I'm a chick, so no piss bottle option.
/jealous

>>8972916

>The problem is I started fapping to gay porn(stories and straight bj vids , audio m4m and discords)
>For the past couple of years it was the occasional trap and shemale.
>I am into femdom.
> I've been watching asmr roleplay vids and listening to audio of girls saying they love me.
>I just fapped.immediatley after I felt sad and lonely.

So for how long have you been fapping daily to porn? A decade or more? That shit fucks you up big time in the long run.

https://www.theguardian.com/commentisfree/2013/sep/26/brain-scans-porn-addicts-sexual-tastes

Some of his comments are retarded but the science is real. Thinking you can hijack one of the most complex motivational systems in your brain to get a rush every day without any consequences is pretty damn dumb.

>>8973700
Good advice

>>8973723
Post cunny or GTFO

How do you love someone who only wants to hurt you

I have severe myopia and I can't bear the fact that my children would have it too.

>>8973736
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2nXGPZaTKik

>>8973738
Procreation is immoral anyway

>>8973787
Hm, no sane woman would have children with me anyway.

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>>8972916
you NEED to stop watching porn and get into some sort of therapy

please, stop inflicting so much guilt and suffering on yourself for being a virgin

Women are actually pretty great, come to think of it. Sure some are cruel whores and heartless Stacys but some are also sweet and caring and friendly. They provide a necessary feminine ying to the masculine yang.

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>>8967385
pissed that i'm banned from /pol/ for posting about the Bogdanoff brothers

>>8973725
i started when I was 12. so 6 years of fapping to porn. And it got more degenerate as time passed.

I'm fucking suicidal man. But if I do it I'll do it so I'm holding out. I don't know why. I just want intimacy. I don't know any more. I feel so strongly that I've wasted all my teen years. I tapped to all sorts of shit, ignored girls yet been so infatuated by them that it was largely what caused my depression in my teens. caged in my bedroom and all there is to do is watch porn.

>>8973690
A funny thing about thoughts is that most of them are recurring. You might not notice it day to day but most of the things you think about come again and again. If you start writing those things down they kind of get out of there for a while. And when they resurge you don't focus on them as if you thought about them consciously, but rather you come to recognize that your brain really isn't in your control. Writing thoughts down is like taking a bit of that gaseous haze in your head and turning it into a solid chunk of data that you can compress and catalogue. It works fucking wonders. Try it.

Is a shared experience greater than the sum of the individuals experience?

Can fulfilment every be attained through a purely introspective contemplation of a positive event, or is external validation instrumental in truly enjoying life?

>>8972207
>More often, English speakers use myriad in the broad sense—both as a singular noun ("a myriad of tiny particles") and a plural noun ("myriads of tiny particles"). Myriad can also serve as an adjective meaning "innumerable" ("myriad particles").
So basically whatever the fuck you want. Both your examples would be fine.

I'm so sick of fiction. I never thought it'd happen to me, but it did.

>>8974639
you're probably out of touch with real life then tbqh

>>8974651
Can you explain further please? I'm not sure I see the connection

>>8974685
Might be just because I'm autismal, but when I get sick of fiction it's because everything starts to feel contrived or unnatural or unbelievable, usually because I'm lacking enough of an anchor to reality to make an accurate assessment. I've started consuming more candid stuff to counterbalance what I used to do, which was consume 100% fiction.

>>8968767
>joyce doesnt teach anything

Hello, I've just started my first full time job after finishing college and I'm terrified that this is all I'll have to look forward to for the rest of my life.

>>8969691
whiplash is not a good movie. it has a very cute message that you have to push em hard or they wont get gud and thats about as far as it goes. its painful to sit through hours of this guy yelling and all the drama. very one dimensional characters... i didnt like it

>>8969740
plato's ideas are still being discussed to this day. he was the one who outlined the problems the west has yet to solve.

>>8974752
I didn't mean it as an insult.

>>8974701
This may hold a lot of truth in my case. I need to do some thinking, thanks

>>8967385
>>8967385
This board is full of cucks and faggot beta males

>>8970681
do it with a friend if youre gonna do it

>>8973723
there she goes again. the fucking attention seeking bitch

NO ONE GIVES A FUCKING SHIT About WHETHER OR NOT YOI Have A DICK YOU WHORE

>>8970681
Don't contemplate life. Call me edgy all you want, but it's only led to suffering for me.

Ignorance is bliss is not just a meme. I try every day not to overthink things anymore.

Clubs are so fucking retarded.

>>8974741
good luck anon <3

>>8972223
i have a gay friend and he doesnt come on to me.

>>8972223
Depends if you believe straight guys can have female friends or not.

Some people will say no, that's impossible, while others think it's ridiculous to ask. I belong to the latter camp.

>>8975078
Where does he cum?

My son is so serious and closed-off since he went to secondary school. I know it's just part of growing up but it happened so suddenly, it's like my connection with him just went dead all at once. During the Christmas break when he was away from school and his friends he relaxed and started laughing again but now he's back to being locked up tight and inscrutable. I hope as he gets older and more confident he won't feel the need to be so stonefaced.

I fear if I don't talk to a therapist soon I'll make the horrible mistake of dropping out of my funded graduate school program, yet there are barely any available ones in the big city I'm in that accept my school's insurance. My university also doesn't offer longterm care.

>>8975242
i don't have a dad but I did that with my mum when I was a teen.

it just happened after puberty and j was dealing with a lot of things. I can't even remember a lot but it was definitely a weird time. Just leave him alone. But uh yeah pretty sure he will be back to normal after a couple of years.

Could it be? Is it possible that I am one of those perverse, hipster assholes? A contrarian for contrary's sake? Do I live an ironic life? Filled with ironic activities? To be remembered, ironically, as I grow older? Surrounded by so-called friends and plastic lives enclosed in overpriced urban studio apartments. Time slipping through every finger fast, no day, no night, no weekends, no mondays. Where does my time begin? When do I begin to live?

>>8972035
Depends on your dreams. But what i meant was that if your dream is the nobel prize, getting there is a long path. And to prevent disheartening, you should set sub objectives or achievments for yourself. And talent is certainly required the higher you fly. Are art and talent subjective? To a degree. You may like your art produce and think yourself talented, but other people might not - or rather, they have higher standards (for people other than themselves). What im trying to say is, if your talent can not be observed, you are not talented

>>8974583
Yes on both

>>8975522
Why therapist?

>>8976110
Why do you think humanity have always projected itself eternally through religion and abstract thought? No one really knows what to do with themselves, for want of a reason. Try not to take it so seriously, or to be so immersed in physical space.

But you'll keep taking it seriously and remain immersed, as we are preconditioned to do. We can never be above confusion. And who am I to talk about preconditions, as if I am anything other than conditioned? Alas...

I saw her walking down the street with her twin and friend. Recalling her red lips, her curly hair and that bubbly attitude made me remember how I really did love her and that lap of hers. Though the rather empty feeling inside of the dreamless me yet again made me step my left leg back and refuse her.

I do not regret it.

I'm in absolute mental and spiritual chaos, and I have been for about 6 years. It's extremely frightening and upsetting but I think I can handle it, and I think I'll be better off for it when I eventually get a grip on things. It's not good or bad, it just is, and frankly worse shit has happened to better people so I'm done feeling sorry for myself.

>>8968859
beautiful

>>8976131
Who else can I turn to? My thoughts feel too heavy to plague anyone I like with.

>>8970173
Nothing wrong with that but why not write for yourself?

What have other to give you,when through writing you can explore whatever you want and get to a point that brings satisfaction to you?

I'm fascinated by the phenomenon of Tinder.

>>8974787
>NO ONE GIVES A FUCKING SHIT About WHETHER OR NOT YOI Have A DICK

Agreed BUT the post was "whats on your mind" so what if shes thinking about how she wishes she could piss in a bottle. Lol I've wished the same thing before too. (Usually on a road trip or something, not when a bathroom is available... that's quite lazy and unsanitary.)

Trying to garner attention because of your gender is stupid. Also admonishing someone for mentioning their gender is stupid.

>>8975242

My partner is like that. I've known him since we were young, and even as a child he was serious. But his stony demeanor doesn't accurately represent his heart - while serious, and rather quiet, he has a light heart and is happy.

I appreciate his calm demeanor as well. Many people are the opposite - all loud and rambunctious, laughing and smiling, but their insides are dark and the heart is heavy.

The fact that your boy has a concerned parent is a good sign he will be fine. :)
Best to you and your family.

i saw my doppelganger on the bus last night

What do I need to give up?

>>8978207
carbs

Last night I fucked up. It was like those times when you fuck up really bad, you destroy something important only to you, but people around you don't notice it, they don't even think you're doing something slightly embarrassing. But it is important to me. Two times already you did something that really breaks me internally. I will not fuck up again. I am sick and tired of you. Good luck finding some guy to care about you and your crippling depression so much as I did.

>>8978342
what did you do, anon?

I can't believe I went to a nightclub and made out with someone. I wasn't really into it. I didn't know what I was doing.

I will stick with what I really like to do even if is considered dull by some people.

>>8978418
We've been dating for some months now and I told her right from the start I'm jealous af. Last night we went to a party of some friends from her class and she just went on ignoring me all night, talking and flirting to almost all the guys there. I don't mind she being friendly with those guys on a daily basis in class, but I just don't want to see it.

>>8967385
I feel like there's nothing I can do but give up at this point. It's all going to shit yet I am too afraid to just quit. I feel like there's nowhere I can go from here.

I've started making analytical videos on youtube. Feels good even though no one really watches whatever I make. Is this feeling of pride in my work what people feel when art is created? Hours editing and working on my script for days give me such a weird feeling of satisfaction that I've never felt before. Is there a word for such a feeling?

>>8978730
Pride. Enjoying the fruits of your labor.

>>8978730
Post link

I also started making analytical videos on youtube but I haven't even finished my first video yet. feelsbadman

I'm ridiculously obsessed with ass. I can't get enough of female butts. Every female see inevitably comes down to her butt.

Teria sido bom se ele tivesse partido uma última palavra comigo antes de decolar. Mas está tudo bem.

>>8978738
>Enjoying the fruits of your labor.
That's probably it. I'm really satisfied with what I've made and I'm content with that. It's a good feeling. I'm not doing it for attention or to make money, just as a nice hobby.

>>8978761
https://www.youtube.com/user/esfelectra
I've only started making videos on anime and whatnot, but I still feel like what I say isn't worthless garbage. Not to mention that most people who make analysis videos on youtube are completely shit, so I'm making videos that I want to see. Videos with substance rather than talking for hours without having made a single point or learned anything of value. Everyone hates analytical youtubers on 4chan, and I hate them too. The only thing I want is just to make videos that people here wouldn't find cancer.

>>8978477
So how is that a fuckup on your part?

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>>8978902
>analyzing anime

>>8978926
And I do it better than anyone else.

>>8978903
because I just can't control my emotions and I let this idiotic event turn into an humiliating torture. Idk man its just plain jealousy over something stupid and small.

>>8978902
Your mic sounds pretty tinny.

I know what you mean about shitty youtubers. A lot of the popular ones list off examples rather than building towards an argument (see: nerdwriter1). Anyway, best of luck. I subbed.

>>8977787
I hate it. I also hate dating as a gay man who wants a monogamous relationship in general, but that's another story.

>>8979025
I never meddle with it myself since I'm a loser, it interests me in a anthropological way.

>>8979006
>Your mic sounds pretty tinny.
I purposefully put the volume down because loud voices hurt my ears. I got a good mic, but I just don't know what's the perfect volume for a video.

>A lot of the popular ones list off examples rather than building towards an argument
Exactly! Or they just describe series of events for entire minutes without actually making any thematic point.

>Anyway, best of luck. I subbed.
Nice, thanks. The next video I'm working on is more /lit/ anyways. I'll be talking about the Nietzschean philosophy of Kreia from Kotor 2.

>tfw you keep using Nietzschean viewpoints in your videos and no one points it out

My sister and her bf are sitting in the living room couch, each looking at its own mobile screen and silent. It's just sad.

>>8979118
I really wish they were fucking. God, my family is so sexually repressed.

>>8979121
I'm so sexually repressed, and I just want to date someone who isn't glued to a lit screen.

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I am without talent.

>>8979132
I guess.

>>8968767
If you only read to get to apply it in real life then you won't be able to enjoy the vast majority of literature.

I’m always tired and hardly sleep
I never eat breakfast or lunch and sometimes skip dinner too
I think there’s something wrong with me
I don’t have anything to show for my life
I don’t have any friends and not by choice, I want friends but people just don’t seem to like me
I’m always upset and I cope by being upset at banal things like school work
I’m not interested in my hobbies anymore
I think I’m pursuing the wrong profession
I hate most people by nature and the very few that I like still don’t like me
I’ve been pining over non-options since I moved to NY
I want to go back in time, aging terrifies me
I don’t like how I look, I think I’m weird-looking in someway or just ugly
Despite rambling about being a genius all the time, I've failed academically
I’m not really actually good at my instrument despite what people say
Nobody wants to spend time with me
I'm easily irritable, often by stupid things like dumb conversations or bad music
Suicidal thoughts (lots lately)
I’m timid. I’m scared of the world. I have a deeply rooted distrust within me. I’m small and alone and sad. I have nothing and nothing to offer the world.
I'm not special or interesting or important.

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I don't know whether or not all of this academic work is worth my time, but I know that I need to go to college to more easily be employed in the future. And yet, at the same time, that is just another means to an end that I do not yet understand. I feel like I'm unplugged from the world and that I cannot reconnect. I need a philosophy or set of beliefs and morals to live by, but I either find myself without the time or the willingness to find one. I feel as though I'm in a limbo - a tunnel with no light on either side...and then there's the fact that I'm putting this on 4chan; I might as well be screaming into a void.

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>>8967385
I wish I was a much better writer, but I would have to write more to do that. And every time I read my writing I hold backspace for a bit and slowly exhale. I can't even post on my favorite Peloponnesian waifu rating forum, because I know my opinion will either fall on dogmatic deaf ears or they'll just be another cupped hand in a circlejerk.

>>8979448
You're good at making sad lists.
Try making one about things that you do like now...
You know, it sounds like you're avoiding some transition or transformation. Go with it! You don't like how you're doing things now, so change. Easier said than done. I know, but many have done it before you. And you don't sound like an idiot - only depressed.

Also, your introspection has become an excuse to pick yourself apart. Knock it off! Introspection is how we become good humans and partners to other humans. Just work hard at what you've elected to do (even if you hate it, atm), and try things until you find one you like.

>>8979469
No way. That's the whole point of 4chan, right?
Transitions are wild - just roll with it.
There is no alternative to change, so it's better to just find a way to enjoy it.

>>8979469
You need to go to college so you can find a job that gives you enough white collar leeway to spend your work time doing a lot of stuff that isn't work and quietly pursuing secondary interests. It is wage slavery of a sort but a compromised kind in which - all other outcomes considered - you generally get a long term victory. This is a depressing truth to have set before you at a young age when you don't feel like compromising but it would be even worse to hit 30, have no degree, no job prospects worth a damn, and no money to fund your interests. The good news is that provided you don't enter wrong field which requires intense participation from you, you will soon make peace with the fact that your job is a worthless circumstantial aspect of your life that doesn't define you and won't give you satisfaction. Recognizing this early frees you to spend your time getting yourself out of the limbo that you and everyone else inclined to thoughtfulness will at some point find themselves in.

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>>8979511
Thanks anon, that helps shed some light on it. I've got that last year of high school nihilistic attitude right now I guess. Maybe it's just a phase.

>>8979511
Very sound advice. Don't feel like you're in a rush to get everything figured out. Just do your best, and work hard along the way as you make your path.

>>8979511
reminded me a bit of this. Fitting since its DFW

https://youtu.be/8CrOL-ydFMI

>>8979132
I know that feel.
I can only fuck my girlfriend in between snapchats.

I have no plan and no hope for the future.

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>>8979817
well, you still have horsey sauce.

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>>8979797
That's pretty fucked up. There needs to be something to create a break from the excess and pervasiveness of technology. (he wrote from his laptop in bed)

>>8979863
You just gotta find the right girl. I'm >>8979797 and my ex hated social media just as much as I did. She just doesn't have the ass my current GF does (she had depression and several other emotional disorders instead)

>>8979903
I'm >>8979863 and my GF is fairly normal with regard to social media. She isn't obsessed with it, but gives it too much credit and takes too many ideas about ideal people and relationships from what I consider to be a dishonest view of others.

>>8979924
I'm >>8979903 and >>8979797, and honestly I need to find a new GF who doesn't use Tumblr. I believe, and I even tell her when she goes off on a rant, that social media is not only a pervading source of ignorance, but it is also tearing apart society as a whole by establishing "safe spaces" (aka echo chambers) that ignore reality and only highlight their own personal problems as "all encompassing".

She, of course, disagrees but her pussy game is ridiculous. How can I disagree? After all, I am just a man.

>>8979118
Ever been the bf in this situation? It's a peculiar kind of feel. I eventually broke up with her, because among other things, I couldn't sustain a relationship with a girl who preferred the company of the internet and absent friends to conversation with a real human, particularly one she claimed to love.

>>8979958
Well, I agree with the thoughts on safe spaces, but I would like to think at least that man is more than the appendage which makes him so. I'm >>8979863
>>8979924 (don't know if it really needs saying at this point)

I'm >>8979970 and I should have read this whole discussion
>>8979797>>8979863
>>8979903
>>8979924
>>8979958
Before posting. My input is that if you're looking for something more than just sex it grows far too wearisome to sustain.

>>8979978
>tfw no qt gay bf to have existential crises with after sex

Why are attractive gay men so shallow?

>>8979983
I'm an attractive gay man with immense depth

You just need to search harder

>>8979990
I'm just bitter since the last hot guy I dated was an air head and I'll probably never date someone that hot again because I just got lucky.

>>8979973
>>8979978
Here is the problem. As a MAN I hunt the pussy. I seek fertile young women. My mind and it's "rational" thinking plays little into my goal of sex and procreation.

I've met more than plenty of men that have fulfilled my mental curiosity. But they are not women, they can't truly fulfill me, no matter how I skew my vision or reason. A part of the Human Condition is the need to be satiated from sex. No amount of critical thinking, reasoning, reading, or writing has ever totally filled my mind as much as the idea of fucking and impregnating a woman, it only gets better if she actually has a brain and rational thinking to back it up.

>>8979978
Well then what's the point of having a significant relationship, or do you think there isn't one? >>8979863 btw

>>8980014
I'm just a fag so what do I know, but wouldn't you rather have children with a woman who complements your qualities rather than mirrors them?

A good author needs to read other people more than he needs to read other authors. I (and most of you) are too autistic to ever write anything worthwhile.

>>8980037
If my child could actually argue my beliefs and prove that my own belief structure is exactly that, a structure that I have been told to believe; I would not only turn my back upon the works that I ignorantly nod my head to, but I would hold him proudly over my head and declare here is the New Genius. The next mind to break the shackles of humanity.

>>8967385
My professor won't stop touching me

>>8980193 that's pretty fucked up. Couldn't you report him/her?

im scared of going to school for english and ending up with no job and no money but at the same time i cant imagine myself being even remotely happy doing anything else

>>8980273
Guess you could either be a teacher or writer. Maybe you could swing for journalism...I would take the advice of >>8979511 but that's just me.

>>8980273
My friend has an English Degree and now he has a successful career doing everything except writing and educating.

>>8980317
what does he do?

>>8980328
Mostly improv comedy and being an Intern's bitch.

>>8980331
Is he happy with that?

>>8980387
He is. That is why I called him "Successful". He gave up his own small business for it.

>>8980393
well, that's good for him.

>>8967385
punching holes in my parachute

>>8967385
Pouring the milk onto my cereal, I pondered on my life choices thus far - what lead me to eat cereal at 4:00 am in the morning? Why were my sleeping habits so different to my younger years? Why do I feel so alone and helpless, having been stripped of the confidence of my childhood?

As my mind fell into an abyss, tears streamed out of my eyes, the milk overflowed my bowl and trickled down the table legs. I fell to my knees and damned the world.

I cried.

I cried over spilled milk.

>>8978452
was she unattractive and did you feel she was beneath you or do your problems stem from some other insecurity

>>8978452
Fug
Are you me
Nobody I've talked to understands why its an uncomfortable memory for me. So I've just stopped trying to explain it.

>>8977253
Therapists are a gamble, i think that most dont care for their patients unless its about their pay. Taking that into account, you would be better off with like minded individuals or groups.

My biggest fantasy is to have a gf for the sole purpose of fucking her sister, if she has one.

I FUCKING HATE WOMEN, THEY ALL SHOULD BE ENSLAVED AND TREATED LIKE OBJECTS!!!

>8981093(You)
>8981093(You)
>8981093(You)
>8981093(You)
>8981093(You)
>8981093(You)

>>8967497
You have to interprete them right. There is always some flaw in each religion, especially Islam because it is the shittiest religion. Totally made up bs trying to copy Christianity.

But anyways. All religion are saying the same thing, they are just too autistic to explain these complicated concepts outside of parables.

>>8981093
calm down son, here's a hug.

I am in the most dissatisfying way imaginable, one half of a great person. And so I drive ever forward, with great determination, through the pile of shit that are my interests, never to achieve anything.

>>8978992
I know that feel all too well, man. Jealousy is toxic.

You know that part in Cabin in the Woods where they're in the room and all fiddling with the thousand different items that can all trigger different entirely unrelated eldritch horror monsters to come to life and kill them? I am basically in that room now, watching all the items fidget with themselves. This is barely an analogy.

I've been trying this recently.

I will awake or go home and the troubles of the night or the day to come will tremble me and I will sit down with a pen and pad or I will sit at the keyboard and I will write. I will put down on page or screen, my life, the day, and write my name as if I were not me. As if I wrote of me as I were dead and write all good things. "He always brushed his teeth. He exercised today. He was in good health, sound mind. He loved his family. He enjoyed his work and did the best he could. He learned something new today, last night, last week. The sun was out this morning and the clouds were beautiful." And somehow the words take on a physical reality and all troubles are vanished and vanquished and because it is my life and not only fiction, I am not unaffected.

And I imagine myself forgiven. There is light which sears at sin and washes. And warmth like waters that fill the cracks of my present perfection and I am accepted as I am. And I am loved, though I am imperfect. And I begin to see what faith is, that misery is chosen, that change is possible.

Try it.

I want to write poetry and something that moves someone but I really haven't experienced that much to draw from. It feels like it'll be of little substance but just 'experimental' type poems that have an interesting structure or word choice or whatever but it won't really say anything. Perhaps it doesn't need to and I'm just building up my ability to have a conversation with myself in the form of poetry so that when I have something to say I'll actually be able to say it.

this cold sucks, and i barely got any sleep either.
the ramen yesterday was really good, but truly i shouldn't have slurped some of my buddy's noodles while he was sick

>>8981085
The problem is I can't find any like-minded individuals and hence feel depressed/lonely.

I am so ugly my mother never showed me affection.

I'm hung up so much on phonetics lately. Even to the point where I'm hearing entire words and phrases as entirely different. "I mean what I say". Right now it's just ironically sounds like a big Swahili or Hebrew word that means nothing to me- "Ahmeenwataseh"

... pop-rock opera


... quirky and quite eccentric.

I love literature. I wish I could always be this motivated to write. But it's like the threads woven into the carpet floor below my feet are intertwined with the graphite in my pencils.

Why are people in cities/towns which are further inland so much more retarded than those on the coast. I recently moved inland and almost everyone is depressed and borderline psychotic. Its the kind of place where people get jumped for looking at someone the 'wrong way.' And its not the only place I've seen like this. The people don't understand how walking traffic should be conducted or road traffic for that matter. They are content with inferiority and even celebrate it. Why? I need the answers.

>>8983482
I live in place like that, it's a living hell.

I don't like who I am. I have loads of friends because I'm charming and friendly but I can't connect with people on a deeper level. I like to be alone. Deep down I'm fucking selfish.
I had a one in a million girlfriend who I dumped, the only one who could probably bare me. So that's what's been bothering me and that's why I wrote this. I don't even poem

A burden for me to keep
Only discovered by few who I let scratch too deep
Not loathing in selfpity but in selfhatred
Not liking what I see
Not able to change what I feel
Or to get past the outer peel
Unable to tell what it's about
That's something others figure out before disliking what they see
As my inner is a mere shimmer of what I hope you be

>>8969899

great

Is it better to try and become more intelligent than you are living your life normally or should you just accept your brain's limitations and be humble before those who are smart and know how to access the drive in their brains that makes them work hard?

I feel despite my interest in art, literature, and aesthetics I never really felt that much smarter than many of my peers. I always have felt limited by things and I'm struggling to accept it.

>>8967385

What an impasse I find myself at. After returning to school with a scholarship and the folks helping out with my rent (and this after dropping out for a bit), I currently feel that I will never know such a carefree time again. My life consisted of studying my subject of choice, and hanging out with my girlfriend. Now I've moved away from a beautiful city, from a beautiful person, to back in with the folks where I am to work a job which, while exciting in its own regard, is work.

It's selfish, childish, and really, no way in hell I should have been given this second chance. But having been given such, I'm sad that its over. Now I'm stepping into the big nothing of figuring out life. Oy.

>>8967385
Shit, gotta use the toilet [runs off autistically].

>>8984123
You will never be truly "great" unless you autistically enjoy said thing, to spend many hours working at it, yet it not seeming like work. Of course it depends what you mean by "limited" but you can always improve.

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The ultimate narrative was life. The reader knew his role and the writer his. There was power in words. Thoughts recorded which connected the reader and the writer. If only for a moment the reader knew the writers mind. Words were markers of meaning. Representations. Meme. Thought recorded. Thot memed.

>>8970173
New opinion to me.. Im wondering; why do u want people to read your stuff for thousands of years?

>>8983482
>They are content with inferiority and even celebrate it. Why? I need the answers.

povertywhat kind of answer did you expect

>>8985020

are you one of those really annoying pseud canadians that try so hard to force this on /pol/?

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>>8983482

Yeah I would vastly prefer to live on the coast, or at least on the shore of the Great Lakes or the St Laurence. As it is now, the ocean is only a fifteen minute drive away. I rarely go, though. Too busy I guess.

I want to be a part of something bigger and grander than myself. I want to feel proud that I'm a part of it and throw all of my energy into it but every time I find something like that, it's not enough. People shit on me for wanting to better myself. People shit on the thing that I want to be a part of and while I care less and less about what people think, it still drains the experience of it's enjoyment. Soon I don't feel proud anymore. It becomes humdrum. I wasted all of this energy on what? I still want to do something that matters but now the apathy is setting in. Why can't I be happy for a little while?

>>8979469

I love this picture.

>tfw I will live and die a nobody

I love ugly but well groomed girls.

Everybody who posted ITT needs to kill themselves ASAP

>>8967385
ravioli ravioli please fucking kill meoli

>>8967385
Fucking jury duty

>>8985597
cant you get out by saying something racist in the interviews?