>tfw rejected for publication again

>>8798249
post the first paragraph/page of your piece

>>8798259
It was a poem.

>>8798274
post it

Quack quack,
I'm a duck.
Quack quack,
what I lack,
Is a bit of luck.

>>8798274
it better have rhyming html color codes

>>8798280
Ok, have at it.

The deer were bounding like blown leaves
Under the smoke in front the roaring wave of the brush-fire;
I thought of the smaller lives that were caught.
Beauty is not always lovely; the fire was beautiful, the terror
Of the deer was beautiful; and when I returned
Down the back slopes after the fire had gone by, an eagle
Was perched on the jag of a burnt pine,
Insolent and gorged, cloaked in the folded storms of his shoulders
He had come from far off for the good hunting
With fire for his beater to drive the game; the sky was merciless
Blue, and the hills merciless black,
The sombre-feathered great bird sleepily merciless between them.
I thought, painfully, but the whole mind,
The destruction that brings an eagle from heaven is better than mercy

Just upload it on kindle. There is no actual review process.

>>8798298
Why the choice of free verse here? Your voice seems much more suited to formal constraints.

I'm not the guy you're replying to, but this kind of thing isn't to my liking anyway. I think that by condensing this poem you could achieve what this already does and more. You don't seem to trust readers, or leave anything to chance. I didn't have to work to uncover meanings in this poem, which is at odds with its heightened tone. Cut down on modifiers, definite articles.

Again, not my cup of tea, but overall I find that this poem fails aesthetically.

>>8798298
that its not complete garbage is impressive to me. but yeah its too long like the guy said. too close to prose

>>8798311
>>8798328
Wrong. That poem is good. I know, because I wrote it.

>>8798298
>>8798337
That's a Robinson Jeffers poem

>>8798337
hey hey hey. its not BAD, we were just saying maybe you'll get accepted next time with our advice

>>8798337
>>8798361

Lol

pretty good social experiment.

>>8798361
>>8798391
I still don't like the poem, just because a published poet wrote it.