What is the opening line to your novel /lit?

He started smoking the day he heard that could kill him.

he woke up with the pillow in his feet.

>>8776495
"I have rights. I have read the constitution," he slurs. "I have a right to free speech."

Abby, I am so utterly sorry.

"Life imitating Britney Spears lyrics, like usual" he thought, while the wind didn't.

Waking up to a loud crash rarely means something good is happening. It's never "CRASH! mom made pancakes!" or "CRASH! We decided to adopt a Golden Retriever!"

>>8776495
I'm surrounded by stately, plump heads and bodies across the sky.

>>8776495
"Humanity is a pathology"

>>8776495
I was born.

>>8776495
CRASH. Mum dropped the frying pan today, or was it yesterday? Our golden retriever jumped at at her while she was making pancakes to appease our one enemy. Two if you counted God.

Pack it up, pack it in, let me begin.

>>8776529
publish this shit now

>>8776495
>It starts in darkness...
and the last sentence will be
>...and ends in understanding.

>>8776495
Twas the second month of his pilgrimage and each passing second seemed to flow ever slower than the last

>>8776538
You mean the last sentence of the novel? That's kinda dumb, honestly.

>>8776520
Any more to share?

"We did it, reddit!"

>>8776495
Her back was curved, carved and pinkish pale, like an icy slope in the morning.

>implying this is a good book

Now we see the door where sky and sea combine.

“Well I’m having a HALIBUT good time” giggled Craig as he knowingly tapped the seafood menu in front of her.

The date was going well.

“This opening sentence can be reflectively perceived upon as a cryptic metaphor for what the book as a whole is ‘about’,” said John.

There was now only one pancake. Two if you counted the CRASH.

"Goddammit", said Father Mather, just loud enough for the congregation to hear.

And truly, for the very first time, Anonymous began the greatest written work that would ever grace the Earth: "His Diary, To Be Honest".

>>8776495
Woody and Buzz appeared from the 11th dimension, subtly Woody's hand revealed the tip of his sloppy privates dangling like a leaf just before the first winter storm.

>>8776529
Divin... j'en veux plus...

End

>>8776495
Jizz on my tits farted Noras lubxurious hole as it had all evening Jizz on my tits until there's no more splurge to sqwander into me isn't it funny, though, thought Jimmy, how her wet naughty farts sounded positively inviting kek kek fwap fwap fwap fwap fwap fwap Ooooh Jimmy Russel me harder fwap fwap fart cum on my tits kekkek, now Jim, patience, fwap.

>>8776666
checked
>>8776503
edgy
>>8776510
6/10 depending on where you take it
>>8776512
3/10 if you're going for a whiny "AND im an NYU film school graduate SUCKA and the school of visual arts AND the academy of art university San Francisco. You SUCK"
>>8776515
2/10
>>8776516
0/10
>>8776520
Seems like it will go very tryhard very soon but has potential
>>8776522
>>8776528
the meme duo

The dawn arrived on another day, great Sol, in all it's vitality and might, casting its rays down upon the scuttling transient forms below.

>>8776516
JUST

>>8776520
memes XD

pseuds detected:
>>8776604
>>8776795

>>8776695
This is cool, but needs to be worded better I think

"Jake, it's your turn", his little sister Amy reminded him.

It was one of those days.

>>8776878
*Seinfeld theme starts playing

"Youre a god damned Nigger ass bitch!" the white leady screams as shes getting pounded in her asshole by Tyrone. My wife's son watches on in horror, and nothing can cast me free from these shackels!

>>8776880

I know it's just a coincidence, but among the things I had going in the background as I wrote the first draft was Seinfeld.

For days they had been traversing the barren slopes of the mountains along the northern border. Dust highlighted the hair and hooves of the horses, and every fiber of Mykhael and Grygory's clothing was gritty and white with regolithic powder.

>>8776888

A man, if he could be called such strides sqaggeredly into the room from outside, draped over his shoulders, a long black coat, his head topped with a short brimmed pork pie hat with a long plumed feather stuck into the brim. For a moment Tyrone and the white woman stop their salacious dance, and a glimmer of hope illuminates your face. You strain against your shackles as the turgid stranger waddles over to Tyrone and his quarry, and reaching into his pocket he draws out a small greasy bottle. Tipping his hat and licking his swollen lips crusted with cheadle, he mumbles a soul-crushing suggestion, "Care for some lube, m'lady?"

>>8776495
>It's an old trick of dishonest people to offer sacrifices which are unnecessary and which cannot be made so as to get out of making those that are necessary.

>>8776943

It's called preemptive facial preservation.

Pretending to be blind let me grope women.

Beyond the swelling hills of the valley rose slopes of pine where the line of horizon met the sun shower of the evening. They towered to my right. And to my left, a young nubile in the back of a sedan lifted her top, her breasts misshapen, dull; a dreadful sight.

>>8776756
I dig this one, reminded me a bit of Dubliners

>>8776495
No, shh, it's alright, don't move.

It was the dust in his nails that had him bleeding.

When I found child porn on dad's computer I called the police, after making a copy for myself.

pomo description of a 13-year-old girl in an informal dress. No I will not take a seat.

>>8776495
I had started that year a failure.

One enemy remained; twelve if you counted the members of the Greek pantheon.

-Festering nigger diarrhea? You get festering nigger diarrhea in the next world, here you have the law.

Mah home boy Tyrone got capped t'day. . . or wuz dat yestaday. . .

I don't think I'm a very good person, and I think most people would share that thought.

>>8776604
>>8776795
>he hasn't read the entire meme trilogy

>>8776855
i have a little sister named amy and my name is jake why are you reading my diary

>>8777435
HAHAHHA

fuck that MEME REDITOR

Only one enemy remained; two if you counted God.

"The first sentence is always the hardest".

>>8777531
wow....

>>8776960
Eugh

>>8777531
Holy...I want more

>>8777531
wtf I hate God now

>>8777531
As a professor at a respected community college I am blown away. Please suck my dick from the back, im a blow hard im a blowhard.

He had only one enemy remaining. Two if you counted God.

When god's light left this world the devil made sure to trick mankind into thinking they weren't left in the dark. That they weren't runnin round blind. That there was a captain at the helm ensuring them safe passage. That they had a destiny. A purpose. A reason. That they were still god's children and not some abandoned pet project. That they were loved.

Only two enemies remained; one if you counted God.

>>8776495
I am a tank.

Only seven enemies remained, seven if you counted god.

Women are shit

Don't push me, because I'm close to the edge.

I stared at the roots cracking through the stone floor and marveled.

"How many hamburgers?"
"How many hamburgers?? What am I? A fucking fat fuck? GO FUCK YOURSELF!"

>>8776495
"Lolita, light of my life, fire of my loins."

>>8777763
heh..

I voted Trump. That's right. I'm not ashamed to say it. I voted for change, I voted for hope, I voted for 1776. Now that I have that out of the way, let me begin my novel.
Ahem.
Only two enemies remained; one if you counted ISIS.
.
.
.
.
killer opening desu

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Donno yet.
Like a sandbox where I'm filling in this patch and then that one. Where it starts is vaguely planned out, but I need to see it as a while filled in before I choose.

Isn't this a more sensible method?

It all began that fateful winter night when my balls exploded.

I was in my twenty-fourth year when the letter arrived.

Her last drop of milk slid from his lip.

I had just came and still had my eyes closed in ecstasy when there was a knock on the front door. I opened my eyes and slitted them in the direction of my bedroom door. After pulling up my shorts from around my ankles, I wiped the excess lotion on my stomach. On the way to answer the door I threw away the warm and sticky semen filled piece of toilet paper.

Who got it?
>>8777777

Mom found the piss-bottles.

This isn't the time to give up, son.

>>8777824
Dude sounds hot. Continue please

"Once upon a time"

"We should start back," Gared urged as the woods began to grow dark around them.

>>8777878
>Gared

>>8777878
Ugh

>>8776638

7/10

"psssh, nuthin personnel, kid"

"Piano music echoed through the long and dark halls, stopped, and started again. It grew fainter and fainter until Isaac could barely hear it over the sound of his own boots hitting the wood floor."

The dead hooker lay on the floor. It was the best of times, it was the worst of times.

The End

Starting a novel with quotation marks should be a crime.

"Never trouble yourself with the opinions of faggots," said Steve.

Gregor realized, with a sort of laugh, that every joke he had recently heard had been told by himself, to himself, and at his own expense.

"How do you think you'll ever be able to accomplish these aspirations of yours?" said mary, "your life and all your goals are nothing but pipe dreams."
"Well I may be inclined to believe you," responded Harry, "but right now, NOTHING CAN STOP ME I'M ALL THE WAY UP"

I was sixteen when comrade Castro died, and twenty when they brought him back.

As my girlfriend stood yelling rant and declaim in her slam poetry my phone lit up with a message: "Trump is president!"

>>8777763
Only one enemy remained, four if you count God, Jesus Christ, and the Holy Spirit.

>>8777806
Reddit-tier opening imo senpai

This is your life.

It took me a long while to understand the New York Times effect on man.

>>8776495
As I came to on the floor, i a pool of my shit and piss, I came to the awful realization that I was still alive

>>8778046
>four
Would have been a clever rewrite had you put three, but you fucked up senpai.

You had one job.

>writing novels longer than a sentence
It's also the last line

Why?

Please do not steal my work.
Plagiarist's will be prosecuted.

Suicide gets a bad rap

Every chapter starts with the rambling thoughts of a teenage mind who never has their beliefs challenged due to never seeing other people.

>>8778079
Mate, we'd already had already had one enemy before he put the Trinity in there.

>>8776495
>It was a dark and stormy night

>>8778127
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Fgdzu-KHxNk

>>8776833
sounds like you're listing off mmo stats

>>8778078
We are trying to write good openings here, not post the worst ones.

It was the best of times, it was the worst of times -- is what one might say, were time not simply an illusion; lunch time doubly so.

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>>8776495

The light was failing.

For the sake of adhering to conventional literary forms and to reassure you the reader that the following two hundred or so pages are written in a style which is familiar enough to you I realize I must begin this my story or perhaps the story I am to write by providing some sense of the context in which the story takes place that is to say the historical period the geographical location the social class and also to provide not only the name but also the background of the individual I have selected to serve as the protagonist of the story the character I of course hope that you will find sufficiently interesting and entertaining to justify my decision in choosing them to receive the focus of both your and my attention instead of the other individuals who appear in this story a story that begins I will now announce at the very start of summer in the year 1973 in an area of Louisiana known as Carville where during the time our story takes place lived a great number of lepers that is to say those inflicted with Hansen's disease who resided there in a hospital located several miles from the nearest human habitation on a bend of the Mississippi River which for the sake of making this story more than a catalogue of facts stated bluntly I will therefore describe instead as the slow tobacco-brown Mississippi forever migrating towards the Gulf.

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Again saith the soul, sadly to the body. Now thou art separated from all thy friends. Now is thy mouth prevented, for death has closed it; nor will it be ever opened, before the high King's doom. Then it will be seen, as the Psalm sayeth, jReddituri mnt de factis propriis rationem. Then shall those servants tell their deeds, truly through wisdom...

>>8776495
The slick mud caused the car to nearly spin out.

>>8776495
The sky above Compton was the color of a television set to a dark blue channel.

>>8776495

T H I S I S H O W E V E R Y O N E B E C A M E I R O N I C .

And then he knew he had truly become the edgeist man in the world.

The title of my book is 'The Edgeist Man in the World'

>>8776495
"just another day on 4chan"

from adventures in brainmancing

>Is it true they're other races beside humans? I don't remember when I was told this. But is it true, right?

Introspective/ fantasy novel or something

>>8778286
Abort mission, ESL-kun.

It was a solar eclipse on the day of the dead. Mother was rushed to the intensive care unit just before I took my first breath.

>>8778291
Any help? I'm too autistic to give up

>>8777523
Any other relatives I need to know about before I continue writing? Your parents' names?

-euh nous sommes anglois monsieur

>>8778311
Well "they're" should be "there are" or "there're" if you want the speaker to come acorss as very informal. And ", right?" turns statements into questions but "But is it true" is already a question, not a statement.

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>>8778326
>there're

>>8778032
Kafka, is that you?
>>8778286
Write in your native language.

>>8776495 I am Commisan... um... and I'm an artist.

>>8778079
Would have been funnier if he had still said 2. You know. Triune God 3 in 1 and 1 in 3. Like Voltron.

Aujourd'hui maman a chuté dans les escaliers et est morte sur le coup -CRASH.

She was ready. The stance, the way she held the bow and the arrow, and the target in the middle - all of those couldn’t be any more clearer. The up-and-down wavelengths of the audience were nothing but background music, and her eyes like a camera lens zoomed in. Take the shot.

>>8776495
She told me she was 18.

>>8778468
>more clearer

>>8776495
4chan is a simple image-based bulletin board where anyone can post comments and share images.

>>8777824
Are you writing Grapes of Wrath fanfic?

>>8776495
人間と人の違い、知ってる?

>>8776529
t. Camus xD

>>8776529
Santo... Quiero más...

>>8777531
GIVE THIS MAN HIS NOBEL ALREADY

Bobby, take the key to the skygate, we need to save Queen Sally!!

Wake up, open my eyes, think about death once again.

>>8776855
I want to FUCK Amy

"An artist respects the silence, it serves as the foundation of creativity." he said in righteous anger.

CALL ME Ishmael.

>>8779012
Loli Amy, teen Amy or 20 year old killer machine Amy?

CRASH. Only one enemy remained; four if you counted God, the Pancake, and the Golden Retriever.

>>8776529
holy...i want more

"I drive a red beetle. Is that why people think I'm gay?"
"Wait, you're not gay?"

God’s opinion of Germany was never uncertain at any one point in time.

>>8779532
This better be good.

>>8776529
>Pyhä... Haluan lisää...

>>8776750
Kek

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>>8779532
I actually want more

I had only one enemy left; none if god was dead, for we would have killed him

"Her hips sloped gently where she lay; but below it was steep and he could see the dark of the oiled road winding through the pass"

>>8778132
>bop bop bop bop

I watch the finnish version every christmas, starting the day after tomorrow
This show is truly only for the patricians of the patricians

>We adopted a Golden Retriever; two, if you counted Mom.

CRASH. Only one enemy remained; four if you counted the fundamentally misunderstood concept of the God-Pancake-Golden Retriever trinity.

riverrun, past stately, plump and if you counted God CRASH mother died today

Re-tre-iver: the tip of the tongue taking a trip of three steps down the palate to tap, at three, on the pancakes Mom just made. Crash!

>>8779664
Sam, is that you?

>>8776529
Godverdomme.. Ik wil meer..

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>>8777346
Can someone please give their opinion on this one?

>>8776495
First of, let me make something clear: this is a journal, desu.

>>8779764
Not good on it's own. Not bad enough to dismiss the whole novel.

His butt hole had itched.

When applications of concealing tones ventured into indiscreet territory: there he sat, rapping discreetly on the stool, while the sea glided over the hemisphere outside.

>>8779855

*When application of concealing tones conceded to indiscreet territory: there he sat, rapping efficiently on the stool, while he squinted at the carnation exuding from the incandescent manhole

The other one was terrible

I love you he said. The girl, camilyn is her name, said "no". "But I love you'". Still no loser.

"Is love real" hirosukinada ponderend upon himself. "No, cuz then I wouldn't have to kill you"

*Unsheathes katana*

>>8776512
This is gold desu.

>>8776515
Ew

That which cannot be seen must tea in hidden. Not because that which is intrinsic, not to itself, but to that which is true to the innerness of itself for all except the mind. That, precisely, is what knowledge is, and that is what which the glimmer propogates, human value.

>>8776638
Lmao nice reference

>>8779942
I can relate; I drink all my tea in hidden, too

“Ah, fuck’, I managed to utter as Ted Roosevelt's face, composed behind round glasses, slowly faded into a divine darkness.

>>8777346
>>8777346
I had started that year
>as
a failure

>>8776529
Sveto ti sve...želim još

See the deep! See the unseen! See the man who saw them all! Open the book and prepare for the ride!

The collection of the final paper signalled the end of formal schooling, and to Harvey, the end of the only stable period in his life

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>>8776529

>>8779659
>finnish version
what? did you filthy fins dub our national treasure?

>>8779942
Write it again without using the word "which"

>>8776495
"Spicy and colourful" I thought to myself, waves of excitement hitting me. Lemon-scented candles, gods gift to earth.

I wish, to die.

"Stuffing your face as usual, huh? I too remember when cannibalism was trendy."

"Wake up. Still alive. Well fuck me."

The night was young the dust was gone when the little maiden was going home.

>>8778598
Sounds interesting, but maybe you shouldn't give too much exposition about the incentive the characters will have

"Gerd, smaerd tsuj er'yeht. Siht tuoba deklat d'ew thguoht I."

>>8780120
im a fat cat who loves to eat john i gotta have a good meal

Yeah, that's me alright. Your probably wondering how I got here.

>>8780228
but lets go back... *shot of a baby being born *RECORD SCRITCH* WHOA WHOA WHOA WHAO NOT THAAAT FAR BACK!

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>>8779624
>>8779641
I'll give more because I'm excited you're interested, I'm probably going to rewrite a ton of it once I get a full working draft out.

(continued from the last sentence)
A German could tell just by looking around himself just what His opinion may have been. It was due to change, of course, but God’s opinion left no room for interpretation.
As countless men in armor and leather boots with muskets and swords infiltrated her through every entrance, God’s opinion was incredibly clear to the villagers and townspeople. Spaniards, French, Dutch, Swedes, Polish, Danish, Czech, Italian, Turkish, other Germans, and even a few English thought it fit to make a rough time of the country. War had been going on for almost twenty years straight, and most of those fighting in it seemed to have forgotten whose side they were on and what they were fighting for, but that didn’t matter too much.
Why were they fighting though, why was God so angry with the Germans? To many of those who knew a thing about recent history and religion, it seemed apparent that a few recent disagreements about how to properly go about the worship of God, his Son, and the Holy Ghost had managed to escalate to a point where things had become unlivable, Bohemians threw an envoy of the Emperor out of a window in Prague, and every King in Scandinavia decided to put their oar into the matter to make things worse.
That was early on in the whole conflict, the Emperor wasn’t even the same guy and the Bohemians tolerated him being there, Scandinavians had turned Pomerania into a desert, and now the French were involved too, and not because of any religious convictions, they just wanted to get some land and loot from the chaos, especially out of picturesque Alsace.

>>8780329
The 30 Years War is an interesting subject matter, one of history's biggest clusterfucks. Any particular reason for the conversational tone? (ie. "the Emperor wasn’t even the same guy") Are you trying not to overwhelm the reader with too much information too fast?
I've only read one book on the 30 years war, The Thirty Years War by C.V. Wedgewood, and it was all heavy minutia all the time.

>>8776495
"Completely coated in a thick layer of semen from head to toe, he laughed."

There's a different darkness out there.

Each person's life is a river -- sinuous, sometimes rapid, sometimes slow, now deep, now shallow, but always moving -- except for Todd Willaby's: his life is a fetid pond.

"Diego walked into the bathroom in shock. This surely wasn't the biggest mess he's had to clean up in his 3 years of being a janitor, but it was nonetheless repulsive."

The bedroom smelled heavily of rotten Chinese food, fecal matter, pungent body odor, and urine. Kevin had been holed up in his room for a week straight and was never the same after that incident at the mall.

>>8780428
The 30 Years War interests me 1.) because it is a clusterfuck, and 2.) Any point in history were massive amounts of people are killed or displaced also interest me. I'm also interested in the War of the Three Kingdoms and the Holocaust because of this.

There's that, and also the fact that I grew up with a lot of theater, especially musical theater. When I was writing it the tone kind of reminded me of Tevye from Fiddler on the Roof. I guess another reason is that I wanted to write a historical book that gave a general survey of what the hell was going on in certain places at certain times using fictional characters in such a way that they may well be real. A good book that does something like this is the Commandant of Lubizec, which is about a fictional Operation Reinhard camp.

I recommend Peter H. Wilson's Europe's Tragedy, it's a monster but it's probably the best account of the book in English.

Sandy unhooked her bra and threw it on the ground. My pubescent eyes glowed and I felt erect. From that moment on Summer Camp would never be the same ever again.

>>8780502
Was reminding the reader of the massacre of a score of 6 and 7 year olds part of your plan?

>>8776756
This is great. Do you have the next couple lines?

I haven't been on /lit/ in years and I'm worried about you fucks. Wtf is all this 'one if you count god' bullshit from?

>>8780570
guess

>>8780527
"Goddammit", said Father Mather, just loud enough for the congregation to hear. The freckled altar boy shook with fear. What a stupid, incompetent gnome.
"Only mouths. Hungry, dull mouths. As if they'd give a holy Mary's fuck", Mather thought as he poured the wine and placed the bread on the worn silvered waiter.

>>8780596
>What a stupid, incompetent gnome.
Is Father Mather thinking this? Why is the next line in speech marks if he's thinking that too?

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>>8776495
*CRASH* The dirty blond brilliant reporter Chris Hansen -out of nowhere- "Why don't you have a seat over there?" he said with his wide jaws.

>>8780609
The narrator is symphatizing with Mather.

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>>8776495
"Cold wind seems to work its way into the back of the shop even during summer despite the sunrays through the six large display windows."

Idk how i feel about it.

Jean sickly, poor and sickly, leans over her troubled bed. It's splattered with blood, both from her wrists and loins, licked by dogs and alike - the dirtiest of the known workers among the hospice; the ugly, unwed and unabiding-- she takes the tip of the prong They use to prow her Privates and sticks it up her red, woolly nose.
Someone enters. It's not him. It's her. The bitch who makes her put white wool-things inside her slit, the bitch who denies her pleasure-- she thinks, and attacks the wall. It's always the wall. White, impregnable, daring-- she 'ucking 'ates it!

>>8780585
Tell me

He's begging. Oh god, is he actually begging? This is so embarrassing. It's like Jesus on the Cross, begging. Got to get rid of him. Maybe in the compost? Nah. Not the compost. Will may find out. Can i make firewood out of him? Do people burn like wood? He was a faggot after all. Oh God, this is too dark for me.

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>>8780676

Slavoj pulled his erect penis out of his pants with a wide grin on his face. He was going to drill my asshole and I could only foam at the mouth in anticipation. As the tip of his cock plunged deep inside my bowels, Slavoj moaned, "how's this for an abject real?"

Record scratch. Freeze frame. "Your probably wondering how I got into this situation."

Record scratch. Freeze frame. "Your probably wondering how I got this retriever."

The man climbs out of the dark into the light and he is blinded in its radiant beauty.

I was a stranger in the city of Vienna.

>>8780636
pretty good, and eraserhead rocks

keep it up

>>8780789
Thanks anon. Didn't really expect much of a response.

>>8777794
this has potential, what's it about?

I killed myself last February.

>>8780821
Lying piece of shit

She drifted through space toward her destination.

It all comes glittering down.

>>8780741
>Record scratch. Freeze frame.

Yep, that's me.

>Close-up of a man with tears rolling down his eyes, black mascara running. Pulls back to a wide shot, slowly. We see two dicks down to the balls in his throat, another man is about to insert his jim-jam into his chocolate maker.

>Flashback to 10 years ago. Another close-up of the boy with tears rolling down his eyes, black mascara running. Pulls back to a wide shot, slowly. We see two dicks down to the balls in his throat, another man is about to insert his jim-jam into his chocolate maker.

>>8776495
"Shall we make a deal?" It asked.

A beaten path lies out before me, foot steps behind me, but I thought I was alone.

Deep within the ocean, the sheer pressure of the waves could be felt even within the insides of his prison where they could not reach.

>>8776495
look out!: Here comes the dawg

Circles of light dancing in a small, dark pool

This time the location was a large block of flats.

>>8781308
What about last time?

>>8781315
A cemetery

>>8781341
Damn.

In this society, it became common to stare for hours into a screen.

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>>8776516

>>8779986
this is a big improvement

The father looks at his son diminutive in stature; who sits hunched over, motionless, dead-eyed, mouth agape. He knew he just wasn't made for these times.

The book is open.

An ocean of boredom was not unlike radio static.

>>8776529
>Two if you counted God.
what was the original opening line that used this again?

>>8781637
nevermind

>>8777531

There was one thing that hadn’t changed in all of two millennia, a person who did enough talking for the both of them.

>>8781602
Me

>>8781622
Deconstructionist, but a bit simple. I can't comment without more context.

>>8781631
7/10 I enjoy natural imagery being applied to modern phenomena

>>8781656
Intriguing

>>8781357
I agree, but you run the risk of seeming preachy or old mannish.

>>8781285
Bland

>>8781679
b-but what about mine?...

>>8781602
Why is it in present tense then past tense?

“Of course I want it fixed today, if I wanted it fixed tomorrow I’d have brought it in tomorrow!”

>>8780769
I enjoy the simplicity of this

>>8776495
Guess what?

>>8781715
Chicken Butt?

>>8780769
The third man?

We worship the fallen gods of dying men. The whispered words rang in his head, the last thing his father had told him as he lay dying, the giant now a curdled corpse

>>8781723
You guessed it, best opening line I've ever written

It was a dark and stormy night.

Enough moonshine and tweak left John bleary, unsure whether he fucked his brother because of the meth or did meth because he fucked his brother.

>>8781728
I think you might be the next Stephen King.

>>8781705
It's deliberate, the perception of the father is that his son is weak and infantile but it's in relation specifically to the times. My idea was to play with tense so that you don't know whether the father has been influenced to feel this way by the world or if his son really is that weak. Changing the tense makes his thinking seem premeditated, like he's already made his mind up about the world and his son's place in it. That's my idea anyways, might come off as hacky.

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>>8781730
>I love it

>>8781208
>>8780821
>>8780461
>>8778296
>>8778109
>>8777789

Go on.

>>8781730
I love you.

It was my turn to beat her, I just hoped I didn't become to greedy.

>>8776495
Nobody gets a cashiering job on purpose.

I was reading a Garfield comic the day the world ended.

>>8778296
>day of the dead
>calling ur mom "Mother"

holy shit pls die

it was the best of times, it was the blurst of times

>>8778250
Is the title of your book Negromancer?

Be confident. Be respectful. Be stern on fees.

Who here /cozy/?
>Henry Watts sighed as he shifted the teacup off of his dog-eared copy of The Intrinsic Superiority of the White Race, a pale brown ring now marring the beautifully-illustrated cover. It had been another in a seemingly endless sequence of after-hours meetings with the newly sworn-in Minister of Racial Purity, Bryant Jackson. Yawning, he extracted himself from the depths of the ancient leather bergère and slid on his favorite pair of royal blue slippers. Hopping awkwardly over the small mountain of expense reports lying at his feet, Henry gave the knob of the small kerosene lamp a sharp twist, immediately plunging the room into darkness, and shuffled off for bed.

You had an arse full of farts that night, darling, and I fucked them out of you, big fat fellows, long windy ones, quick little merry cracks and a lot of tiny little naughty farties ending in a long gush from your hole.

>>8776495

"Winner winner, chicken dinner!" Gary went home a winner with a chicken dinner that night; the irony is that he is a goose.

>>8778187
Holy fuck, have you never heard of punctuation?

I think I raped a 10 year old last night.

I counted god today. Or was it yesterday? I dont remember

Slam, slam, slam
Bang, bang, bang
Take it, take it, take it

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>>8781730
Nice

As a youngster he hugged the right-hand side of the screen in the sidescroller of life, impatient and unafraid to meet the enemies that lay ahead.

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>>8780044
We enhanced it, Norwegians made one too

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=YEAos26po7Y

im gay

>>8781357
I like the sentence, but I agree with anon who was worried about it getting preachy.

>>8781734
Well then you need to say something like "he had already known" because as it reads now, you won't get the benefit of the doubt and people reading closely will assume you've made a careless mistake.

Only way I can see it working is if you put every thought in past tense throughout the story or for this character. Then what we originally assume is a mistake will be recognized, eventually, as a purposeful decision.

I don't like sand.

>>8777983
Made me lol

We do care about your views. We do care about your thoughts.

>>8776529
Herre... Jag vill ha mer

>>8782311
beautiful

(You)

Now that I've got your attention...

>>8776495
preface:

Before these words be read a word is required in advance to indicate this and next words; nothing.

Chapter 1 For water, for freedom:
In his mind it was almost time for quite some time but when a loud "Whoop Whoooooop" sounded he could not suppress offensive thoughts.

>>8776495
Brother Bertram finished the Terce prayers just as the second sun rose over the mountains to the West.

"Patients die, and I still get paid, that's all I can say for certain."

Wind whips the shutters hard against window panels all along the house.

Her virginity was stolen from her with each slapping sound as his fat belly gently collided with her bare ass.

"Have you wondered," she whispered, "What it'd be like to die?"

>>8782691
I would probably read this one.

>>8782708
*ever wondered

>>8777817
>>8778043
>>8778296
>>8777083
>>8780461
>>8781730
>>8782691

So far, so good...

>>8782714
>>8782727

Thank you, dearest cucklings! I shan't waste another year postponing this novella's completion.

I'll take a potato Chip and EAT IT.

>>8782596
It's coarse and rough and irritating and it gets everywhere.

>>8782788
Your producting good text, I really mean it, I don't see stuff like this everyday - but man! You have to emphasise in your writing! Take it like this: "I don't like sand... It's coarse and.. rough and irritating.. - and it gets everywhere."

I arrived in New Orleans in the rain at 4:20 in the morning.

>>8782998
Are you John Williams? I can only wonder what the book is called

>>8776495
There's nothing gay about getting your dick sucked.

>>8783023
danktotum

>>8776529
Heilige….ich will mehr

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>>8783023
kek

>>8776519
This is very familiar. I'm pretty sure I have read this before.