ITT: We write like we're famed Goosebumps author R.L. Stine

Damn, were they really that corny?

>>8738946
"Corny?!" I yelled.

"I don't care if I'm being corny! If we don't arrest those ghosts by sun down, mom and dad are going to be their slaves for the next three-thousand years!"

That was the moment I knew we had to trap the ghosts in the Internet by creating sanscrit copypasta. The white middle class ghosts would have to haunt the pasta because how could they leave without looking racist?
It was then I knew I would save Mom and Dad and we would all go to Applebee's afterward.

but, where are we gonna find an english-sanscrit dictionarry at this time of night?

>>8739002
Then, I knew. The old farmer we talked to the day we moved into this new town.

"Follow me, Eddie! I know just what to do!"

It was then that I realized...Eddie had already turned into a ghost.

File: 1479158392829.jpg (25KB, 583x578px) Image search: [Google]

25KB, 583x578px

>>8738933
>I didn't need to put on my shoes, because I was already wearing them indoors.

POOP ASS POOP ASS POOP ASS

REDPILL ME THREE-PERSON'D GOD

I'm not familiar enough with the prose in Goosebumps books to satirize it, as I haven't read one since I was 7 years old. You should be embarrassed that you are familiar with the writing

>>8739138
>he doesnt unironically appreciate goosebumps
how pitiful

>>8739138
>>8739160

Haven't read it in forever either. I just remember thinking they were very stupid by the time I was in 3rd grade, but I read them anyways because they were the only things worth reading in my Elementary School library.

I remember reading the one about the living dolls because I thought the cover looked super scary, and halfway through the book, I physically scoffed because the plot was so dumb.