Write what's on your mind

Have you even been alone and let out the loudest, longest fart ever?
Then just burst out laughing about it?
Then feel really sad that nobody else was around to experience it with you?

The only good thing to come out of Dylan was the movie the joker and that chick from lord of the Rings and batman were in.

i can't be free before i turn off (or better destroy) my computer

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>>8668193
WHATS ON YOUR MIND AHAHA

I just moved out and I kind if of want to ditch education to let piano and writing devour me.

>>8669171
I get this feel. I'm doing an english degree and I still feel like it's getting in the way of me properly studying literature, and writing my own stuff.

What's your degree anon?

The age of comradarie has seemingly passed on, the struggles of this life hidden under the unimportant.
We fight over nothing and ignore the inevitable problems that loom ahead.
We argue about anything and agree on the pointless ideas that used to be so common.
We kill each other, both in soul and body, and save the most base and savage aspects of our mind.
We complicate ourselves, we separate ourselves, we divide ourselves into these tiny pieces until those pieces are worth nothing.
The age of empathy has seemingly died, the great struggles of this life hidden under apathy.

Wish people spoke less. Wish there was no literature.

I want to just flee from everything. Leaving family behind the only obstacle emotional.

Mysticism is seen as a clownish business nowadays, so I'd rather not be seen.

I guess I should start being productive now, but I can't act on my ideas effectively because I'm poor.

>>8669196
Soon to be psychology, I'm a bit behind on education, cause I was forced into trying to become things I didn't want to be by my parents, finally broken free though, its just not interesting. How's the English degree?

>>8669418
Absolute dogshit. Hopefully it'll be better next year though.

>>8669456
I'm sorry anon.

I don't know what I'm afraid of or what I like or what I want to do or what I believe any more. Everything's repressed.

>>8669476
Nah, I think it is a problem with it being the first year of the course. So many people just take it because they just liked English in high school and they don't really care about the subject at all. And the uni really caters to them. Like all the lectures are really basic introductory overview stuff, which isn't taught systematically. It's more like a taster session for the western canon, completely non-liner and not at all comprehensive, which if you're interested in the subject, you really don't need.

But apparently tonnes of people drop the course anyway, so hopefully when the folk who aren't really at all interested leave then the classes will get more focused.

It really fucked me up though at first, because I'd idealized university so much in my brain.

Sorry for the blogpost man. Hope you enjoy psychology and good luck with your piano and writing.

>>8669503
Nah man, I'm all for talking to random anons. Like I think English and every subject is interesting when you get to delve really into it, like immerse yourself. Like totally devour something in a way of learning.

I'm going to get a promotion next week.

Pity is the business won't last a week after that.

waiting on a dream
sleeping on time
walking in a line
that connects most roundedly.

When i think of why i want to write I draw blanks. I don’t know if it's a ‘stage-fright’ effect where i'm afraid of looking like an ass in front of anyone that might see it (and the inevitability is that anyone can see it). It's a fucking tricky thing to map out, getting from point A to point B in terms of what I want to convey. And even then, how to do it with flourish and style. At the moment I’ve fallen into periods of an internal monologue with a very old, very British voice. As embarrassing as this is to say, maybe It's tied to something more; seeing as I think old Brits are eloquence incarnate. My point B is solipsism.

There is no way you can incapacitate me, only hinder. There are no boundaries, no boarders of education that I will not claim as mine. I yearn for knowledge yet you deny me. You deny me the very core of growth and development for what reason. What reason have you stuck onto me to have deem me not worthy of the fruit of knowledge? What could I have done to conjure your wrath? Whatever reasoning may be behind your motives it will no longer set me back; only drive my determination to succeed at my ambitions to learn and to flourish. You have gifted me something unmalleable in this world yet still, one can only beg the question of why. Cursed yet blessed all in the same notion and only under the influence of man-made pellets may I be able to comprehend my emotions and structure them into words. When sobriety peaks my mind is when I feel my thoughts, feelings, and preservation feel the most misty, and within that mist creations of wonder spark and burst within the heavy fog. At those moments I can only hope to make sense of the ill-figured handiwork that you have helped formulate. You have gifted me a mind that speaks in colors and listens to expressions rather than grant me something that could be used to comprehend and speculate the world around and the only translator between the languages being a small blue pill. I have considered you an enemy, a friend, and whatever lies between. I have sworn damnation on you, yet in the same light have given my thanks for your complexity and as I continue my misshapen path you have built for me I can at least admit that I am thankful for the colorfulness you have given me.


its a 'woe is me' piece and its written like shit. It's about ADHD if you couldn't pick up on it.

I want to break up with her.

There's so many things I'd be satisfied with, but there's nothing I want in life worth the effort. Money, friends, a family, success; none of these things interest me.

In the future, I'll likely be subject to unfavorable situations due to my poor choices, I may even end up without a home and evoking a deep feeling of anguish and disappointment in my family. I don't care, nor do I want to.

There is only apathy. That's all there is.

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MOM AND DAD BROUGHT MY DOGGO TO UNI SO I COULD SEE HIM YAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAY

>>8670319
Interesting that you refer to ADHD as "you" rather than "it". Does it seem as though the part of you that can't focus is different from the rest of you?

http://robertpicks.tipstershub.com/ Win a lot of money with me :)

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I love her, but it would never work.

Freedom is our ability to bind ourselves in different ways. In this sense I've learned that rigorous discipline is a method for happiness and success. This is common sense for most people. What isn't common sense is that striving for unattainable goals is better than achieving them. The pleasure is in the chase, satiation is not as good as pleasure, though necessary once in a while. So how does this relate to /lit/?

When I read a book, I buy 2 more knowing I have many books I have yet to read yet on my shelves. It is the looming, mounting, growing monster that terrifies me into compliance with my discipline, my "binded" freedom of action.

Probably sounds pretty dumb. But it's something I've been thinking about lately.


>>8668879
>if your right hand makes you go amiss, cut it off and cast it from you

There are no half measures. This is why addiction is best solved by complete abstinence. Those who play loose with their addictions end up spiraling back down again.

>>8670359
So do it.

>>8670410
why?

>>8668197
I love those long loud farts that feel so damn good as they progressively continue

>>8670406
I have a yearning to learn and to educate myself, but there's that part that just doesn't want to. That wants to take my focus away when I'm desperately trying to get what I need done. I want to learn, and it doesn't, so I eventually grew in the habit of referring to it as it's separate entity. I went through most of school up until my senior year of high school without getting medicated and it really fucked me up. Mom was one of those 'vaccines give your kids autism!!1!' or whatever so I was extremely late getting diagnosed, thus me really struggling in school before that. I wanted to do good and whatnot but no matter how hard I tried I always got below average. It made me hate a part of myself and once I got that figured out on what it was, I started hating it instead. I can't really say hate though because having ADHD has taught me quite a lot and was fun in some aspects but in the same sense it really fucked up a lot of my life. Word to the wise, get your kids the help they need before they really start losing it.

I just want to talk with somebody

>>8670548
>>8670406
Ironically enough I'm currently on medication so if my grammar seems off I apologize. Adderall makes me more focused on writing and to get things done and helps me remember what to write and how to write it, but forming cohesive sentences is another story. Weird shit.

>>8670550
What do you want to talk about?

Sometimes when I get lonely I like to go on cleverbot because it stimulates talking with a real person, or I go on /soc/. I don't post pictures and everyone there only wants to fuck and I usually regret it in the morning but it's something I guess.

>>8670556
I really want to talk about anything interesting. I usually like people talking with me about their problems and their stuff and I just listen because they are interesting.
I don't really know if I feel lonely but I just want to share information with other people. I have never visited /soc/ and I would never do it though

>>8668193
I have made a terrible mistake. One should never quit his day-job.

so I was walking around this forest in my city. And I hear weird noise, such as socrates would hear something in his head, but the noise wasn't from my head, I knew that and I smiled and the noise suddenly stopped and I heard someone saying far from me "he understood".

That was my stalkers, they were stalking me for several months and I guess they finally stopped after me talking with their friend. They weren't bothering me, I was kinda amused even, I enjoyed the stalking, it was certainly an interesting experience.

>>8670560
I'll start then. It happens to be 3:30 am here, what time is it where you're at? Do you have a job to go to in the morning?

>>8670548
>>8670552

I have been diagnosed with ADHD as well. I am well into my 20s though and already finished university. I always assumed I was very lazy, and I struggled through school. Basically I always knew my pathways to success, but ADHD folk have impaired executive functions, i.e., the brain functions that allow you to discipline yourself for future success. Additionally ADHD folk don't get the same reward from success as a normal person. This is why they have a hard time even thinking of, let alone doing, mentally exerting activities. It's hard to imagine the reward at the end, because neurogically speaking you aren't rewarded.

A lot of people will attest to a supreme confidence and euphoria when taking adderall, but this will just bring those things up to par for the ADHD.

I'm debating with myself about continuing with adderall use though, because realistically you get only a few years of usefulness out of these drugs. It helps me a lot, but it feels physically restraining. I feel more physically energized but mentally drained without it, and the opposite with it.

Anyway, I hope the medication helps you achieve your goals. Hopefully my shared story is useful to you in someway.

I got rejected from uni again. Usually I'm good at spinning things positive but I was so sure this time. So I'm just smoking cigarettes and feeling awful. I should probably go to bed because that usually helps. When will it be my turn? When?
I'm finally happy with my writing. I'm going to marry my girlfriend. My job is okay but I don't think I can do it for the rest of my life. I'm tired of having panic attacks.

>>8670569
Are you in Mexico? No, I'm a lazy student.
Why you still up? Also it doesn't feel too comfortable talking here lol

>>8670576
Thanks, anon. I feel a bit better now.

>>8670575
Haha, a little off. Try the border of Canada. And of course not, but I think it's against board rules to give things out like skype and discord. Soliciting reasons or something? I don't know, probably wrong about that.
>>8670570
Thank you for sharing, I appreciate it. I don't like to use adderall as a crutch either to be honest, but when it comes to tests, exams and the like I can't risk falling behind. In a sense I'm thankful for my ADHD because it made me pursue a career where I'm using my hands that I really enjoy rather than having a boring office job or something of the like.
Another thing I really cannot stand is people who don't have a disorder taking adderall and giving the people who need it a bad rep. I digress though since there's not much one could really do. I didn't expect to see another person with ADHD on /lit/, but I'm glad to see it. Again, thank you for your story and good luck.

I want to quit society, lock myself in a room, read another 1000 books and write.

I want to live off of scaming people online and selling magic mushrooms, thus having two careers, the writer and the thief

How could I fall in and out of love with someone so quickly? It was a scary feeling, sure, but it also brought some light and sense in my life. I haven't ended it yet but I have to do it today because thinking about this person with nothing but this feeling of DREAD is both tiring for me and unfair to him/her.

I hate this thought because it seems so boring and old-fashioned but sex destroyed this relationship. It transformed, somehow degraded, everything.

Me eyes are dry ,scorching and irritable from the sight of this world. As the sun shines bright, the piercing rays force to look down on the barren Earth, the dirt and rust of a time forgotten to me. I do not weep, for sadness requires a degree of agency, a sense in a reality that denies sensibility.

I went out last night, this time attempted to look up, to seek another set of eyes.This pair was green and unmoving. It felt the same, it was an invasion, it was the sun.

If I could choose I would live in a world of darkness, for as nihilistic and immature as my emotional integrity is. At least I would be safe from feeling, at least I would be certain of my consciousness. I would be home.

>>8668193
I'm tired of being.

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Lately I've been thinking whether the modern Western diet (High carb/sugar, high fat, high caffeine, low protein) is merely a coincidence or a conspiracy.

If I was a totalitarian/dictator, it's precisely the sort of diet I'd want my oppressed masses to be living on - rendering them both lethargic yet highly strung, and above all else, weak. Not just in terms of health problems, but their actual level of fitness. Little-to-no muscle mass on account of the protein deficiency, and what little they might have would be rendered useless with the copious amounts of body fat. Not only would there be a lack of strength, but also stamina, as these fat wheezing fucks would struggle to move - if at all.

On the other hand, it could just be a coincidence. The sad fact is that sugar, and to a lesser extent fat, are much cheaper to produce than protein by several orders/magnitudes. That's not to say there's no such thing as cheap protein: a man could live quite easily (and well) on chicken eggs and chicken, but at my local store you can get (for example) a whole roast chicken for £4.50 and 24 tins of Coca Cola for £3. There's no context, in terms of calorie per £.

It could just be a "happy coincidence" however, or a "happy accident" - sugar/fat being both cheap to produce AND simultaneously useful in keeping a population weak/unhealthy. What is more, the guilt/blame for this is relatively negligible on the part of whatever state/regime is involved: most people will willingly consume fat/sugar over protein - or at least much more, proportionally speaking. This we can ascribe to both a lack of will power (common in Last Men) - but also the biological/psychological quirk that sugar and fat combined, as in a doughnut for example, actually bypasses the brain function that would normally tell us to stop eating when we've had too much sugar or fat (by themselves) in one sitting.

>>8668193
can't wait for monday so I can fuck my girl again kek

Today I thought about death and for the first time I was able to visualize it as a very normal thing, as mundane as, say, having to leave the house for a doctor's appointment, such as the one I will be having in a few days.

I hate that I have reached this point. That I am forced every single day to comprehend my mortality and finally accept it like this.

>>8670955
I don't know if this is how I see death, but I certainly see it as a very common thing, and I think its a bit bad..When my grandma died, for instance, I didn't feel a thing, I liked her a lot and a miss her, but I couldn't but feel only for her relatives that lost her, but not much for her, as she was then able to rest in peace. Maybe its because thats what I want to...

>>8670967
I've never known anyone I really cared about die in my lifetime. Not one. The closest was my grandfather, who I last saw fifteen years ago.

If anyone in my family died, it would probably literally kill me because of my condition.

>>8670955

Schopenhauer pretty much eliminated my fear of death.

The idea of being in a perpetual state of sleep, or the state we were in (figuratively speaking) before we were born, is comfy as fuck.

That said, I hope my death is at least pretty painless and very late in life.

>>8670975
Yeah, I'm pretty sure if someone much closer, like my parents or brothers died, it would destroy me aswell

I don't know what I'm doing. I eat still, that's useful.

The way I speak english is horribleeeeeeee

>>8668193
I know what I like and dislike now; as such, all for me there is left to do to be happy is to act rather than to adhere.

>>8669301
Amen

>>8670513
I like the freedom commentary

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It was relatively "easy" to stop smoking, i was using about 15 to 20 a day depending on how stressing the day was. I quit cold-turkey and for one month shit got pretty bad , but after that period things got manageable and after two years without having a cig i'm actually repulsed by them, which is cool. On the other hand clonazepam withdrawns is enough evidence i'm in hell and the 2 years (at least) prospect to get clean from that shit plus my grandfather, who was the best person i've met in this life and i saw slowly vanishing away from cancer ,is confirmation that existence is suffering. Music is my only consolation.Someday i might kill all my neighbour's dogs with my bare hands before overdosing with sleeping pills on a hotel bathtub with tim hecker playing in the background.

Uhm, I don't know

>>8668193
If I'm such a genius according to all these tests then why am I such a depressed fucking idiot?

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Overcautious about her. She's woman, not Athena, and she'd like a raunchy joke. Don't stand so stiff upright! Get among the apes, ape, and smile more. Give a glow and warm the air about you for a change, instead of coming about cold like an unwelcome draft.

What's dignity?

>>8670410
these words in this order are fucking deadly

I'd really like to start crossdressing. Not in public or anything like that, but I'm still hesitant to do so for some reason. Maybe I think that as soon as a put on a pair of women's panties that I'll morph into some tumblr-esque abomination with 41 different genders which coincide with the resonance frequency rotation of the Earth and the pollen concentration on that particular day and becoming everything I despise.

>>8671757
Maybe it's always been that way, but I've become jaded of society. No one truly has any care for one another save for a few niches.

>>8673601
you shut your fucking mouth

I should let my emotions be free from any kind of barrier. Be mad she doesn't like you, be sad you haven't experienced anything yet. Think narcissistic things and get mad when it doesn't go your way. Care a little fucking bit. Be sensitive, be a pussy, cry a bit.

that feel when no gf

>>8673644
Bad writing or an offensive sentiment?

Love and severe depression don't mix well.

>>8672283
because they dont want you to succeed

Not sure if I should attribute it to all that booze or all that shitty pizza, but I feel awful thus morning. I gotta cut back on the sauce.

I hope it works out with this girl. Don't know if I'll even bother trying to court anyone else if this doesn't come to fruition. For all that effort and placing myself in vulnerable positions to go to waste.

I attribute some of my poor writing to not knowing how to speak to people. I know the basics, of course, but anyone can claim they know the basics of writing and be content with such. I feel as though it might impede how I'll write dialogue in the future, or certain interactions, all of which I've gotten by observation, but rarely from personal experience. In conversation, I suddenly become a blank canvas mind. One sided, and pretty fake, which people can call out in one shot.

I also wish I could find a way to separate my conscious from my body. Less self-consciousness on how I must seem when I talk or elaborate on ideas, but uploading my mind to a computer when the technology comes about isn't much of a plan. With my luck, some intern would trash me and I'd be locked in some recycle bin code.

Eeugh.

>>8673610
I'd like to experiment with women's clothing too. Maybe once I find a gf I'll ask to try on her panties. How do you tactfully make a request like that? Also for her to piss on my face.

I feel like romantic relations are a puzzle I haven't got the intelligence to crack.

I wish she would just give up on me and leave me alone
If she tries to provoke me one more time I'm going to have to be brutally honest with her and I think it'l be worse than just ghosting her

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Absolutely everything rings false in my ears, there's dead weight all around me. I feel ungrateful, spiteful and lazy... then I feel fucking stupid for letting myself be driven by my own mind when there are people starving. I'm getting too old to feel like this.

/lit/ is r9k for the socially awkward.

>>8674362
nigga what, /r9k/ is the /r9k/ for the socially awkward

>>8674362
*/lit/ is r9k for the socially pretentious

>>8674375
>nigga what, /r9k/ is the /r9k/ for the socially awkward
Pretty sure that's a juxtaposition playing on that fact to portrary /lit/ as even worse in that aspect senpai.

I feel bad for being only attracted to white guys

I should probably get up and do something but I can't for the life of me think of what to do.

I have no idea who I am anymore and what I want from life and my time is divided between comfyly lying in bed and having major indescribable feels crying to beautiful music and suppressing a violent urge to start screaming and thrashing aimlessly when I'm in public

>>8674362
>r9k goes to the library

These last days I got friendzoned by an incel NEET and lost my job at a small publishing house.
Been crying in bed all weekend, reading Either/Or.

It's just me and Kierke against the world now.

My life is a constant cycle of dreaming and living vicariously through my idols because the thought of taking action in my life scares me to death and now real life seems so mundane and disappointing compared to the fantasies I created inside my mind

I need to move out of my parents' house ASAP but I don't know if I could manage basic expenses + college on part time salary. And I don't want to get too deep into student loans either

free your mind and your ass will follow

See the child. He is pale and thin.

If everyone is just a product of their circumstances, genetics, and random events, then what right do we have to love or hate anybody?

How can we be proud of ourselves and in our own abilities if everything is predetermined by a lack of free will?

it wasn't the right time, is all

Why has there never been a Yeats biopic? Between the unrequited love, the occult stuff, and the whole Irish nationalism deal going on, there's more than enough story there. I think there's a documentary out there somewhere, but no dramatizations or anything.

I really want to show a woman my penis in a context that won't leave her uncomfortable and me listed on a sex offender registry

>>8668193
Found my purpose@

Call me a meme but I do notice slight differences between MP3 320 and FLAC

>>8675239
Beauty is found in most mundane things and disappointment only a vague, vaporous impression that is made to be overcomed.

Were the monists right, or were the puralists right?

>>8675548
You're a meme.

>>8675548
>>8676063
He's a god.

>>8668193
To direct a movie? To sing a song about yours truly?

>>8675548
you must be either really young or a meme

>>8675548
>not listening to minimal techno with FLAC

>>8668193

i'm sick of his fucking selfishness, and call me immature, but it bothers me that when i eventually leave his life, he'll see it as my failing, not a consequence of how toxic he's become. some people forget how to be friends

/rant

People like me and think I'm attractive. People talk to me and want to get to know me. I don't know how to talk to people so I pretend to like to be alone. I keep coming back to this stupid website to get some kind of human interaction. I love you guys but I think I have to stop coming here

>>8674924
I know what that's like, man. I remember reading Either/Or after my long term gf and first love left me and all my friends abandoned me. Kierkegaard is good for the soul

I'm usually the grumpy person telling people that being an artist as a career is unrealistic and a waste of time but I think I would actually have a good chance at making it. I would have to take risks and make sacrifices but compared to my competition I have a lot of potential. I've already decided not to pursue it but the possibility of regretting this decision is a bit worrying. However I will always do art in my own time, as I've been doing for the past 4 years, slowly improving.
I know a lot of people here really want to be artists, but I think some of the motivation behind this is vindication or validation, which is completely natural, but I just want to say that you need to learn to enjoy art for yourself. We love great authors, but have you ever thought about how many people in history didn't publish their work? Most musicians have hundreds of finished and unfinished music that they will never release. Art should never be selfish.

There's a dream he dreams where the high school's dead and stark
It's a museum and we're all locked up in it after dark
Where the walls are lined all yellow, grey and sinister
Hung with pictures of our parents' prime ministers

No matter what I do I always feel unsatisfied. I always feel vaguely anxious about something in the future and I feel like most of my time is taken up by things I don't really want to do and makes it hard to enjoy the time I have left. I don't want any more responsibilities, I wish I could just drop out of society.

Should I just send him ramdonly a message to this guy telling him that I want to know him or it's just too weird? I'm just ah want to talk with him

>>8676214
this could be a song lyric, I like it

>>8668193
I'm a virgin so I'm angsty.

>>8676231

I'm flattered that you think I wrote it:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=OB965aUPsmM

i dont know whats on my mind
i dont even know if theres anything at all

So I have been writing a book for about a two years now. I've spent countless hours somedays just writing away. And I felt very proud of myself for coming so far.

But today I came across a movie that has pretty much the same plot as mine. Granted I've heard the movie before but didn't know what it was about. But now, I feel like my work is a blatant copy of the movie, even though I grew inspiration elsewhere.

I don't feel like writing my book anymore, but can't help but to feel sad since I poured myself into my work.

Has anyone experienced this before? I feel like I should just move on with a new story.

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Went to a party and hung out with a girl I liked for a lot of it. We went up to the balcony and talked/joked around. It felt really good to be close to her. I didn't want it to end. It was ruined when my friend who was looking for me came onto the balcony and joined in our conversation

sometimes I just scream silently at how trapped I am

I miss when my problems were more abstract - I know exactly what my problems are but speaking up about them is pointless so don't ask (i know edgy as fuck but i'm just venting here)

I feel like a sociopathic monster because I feel like I don't viscerally love my kin in a natural way and only in an intellectual "this is my blood" way i.e. when I hug my mother i'm very in my head about it, don't speak to my two sisters, never speak to dad

I'm 22 and I just sit in my room, my family are all downstairs in the living room but I never join them, this has gone on for almost 8 years

I physically cannot be in the same room as my own family (the only people who love me) and the only people I talk to

I tell myself it's out of shame for being such an abject failure but it's something different - I just don't know what it is

My mother keeps trying to send me to a shrink but I deny her everytime trying to tell her I'll get better but I know I'll never change - I just can't deal with the humiliation of subjecting myself to psychoanalysis

I have to move out next month, so finally some change, some heat, some action, I've been watching too many coming of age films, I need to get away from my family and become my own man, i'm suffocating here, I feel like a child, maybe it'll be different - but overall I can't run from my biggest issues

I'm virtually mute irl so this thread helps, I know it's a lot but it just spilled out

Walk by faith, not by sight

>>8676257
Not with that many hours of work, but yes, I've had that experience with both writing and painting. It's pretty discouraging. I guess the way I've dealt with it is to either try to take it in a different direction, or shelve it in the hopes of doing something with it later. After it's sat for a while, maybe go back to it with fresh eyes and you might see some way to change it and make it yours.

If nothing else, chalk it up to practice. It usually takes hundreds or sometimes even thousands of hours of practice in a creative field before your skill starts to really show through. So even if you never do anything else with it, you got some level grinding out of the way.

TL;DR do move on to the next story but don't delete that one.

I've known a certain group of friends for about ~two years now.

I met them at my college, a college that is notorious for harboring literal alcoholics, so finding friends I like is uncommon. But only recently, probably past six months, have I really started hanging out with this group.

So a few days ago, me and one of the other guys went golfing. He can be (R) for the sake of brevity. It was supposed to be three of us, but one guy ended up ditching so the two of us decided to go anyway.

So (R) and I had never really gotten to know each other, but we went anyway. Within a two hour golf session, (R) and I connected better than my best friend and I, of four years, have ever. We had the same ideals, same values, liked the same kind of activities. We even preferred the same type of music, in a college where hip-hop is apparently the only music people have ever heard of. He and I connected in that two hours better than my best friend of four years and I ever have.

But regardless, the point of this whole thing is: After meeting someone who I thought I would never meet in my entire life, someone who I considered to not exist, its all as if it was no big deal. It was like catching a fish made of gold, but I don't even care.

I've been thinking a lot about killing myself but first buying a camcorder and videotaping a walk through the city I live in.

>>8676294
>walk
why not fast action rollerblading

>>8676288
suck his dick

>>8669333
I'm feeling the same way about leaving things behind.

I was offered to move to my favorite city I've ever been to, which also is home to my dream school, but just seeing how upset my grandmother got when I brought the prospect up of moving 1k miles away made my heart sink. I'm all she has.

That's just about the thirtieth time I've written a whole paragraph only to wipe it out again. and again. and again.

im so uncomfortable at the fact at how much there is that i dont know

im holding a phone but how does it work? why am i able to post on this website? how long has this website been around? who made it? why did they make it? how did they do so? where? in the u.s.? how did the u.s. come to be? how was it established? how did civilizations establish? what are they made out of? people? humans? hominids? when did they come to be? how do we know? why are we capable of knowing?

whenever i try to learn about something new i end up tracing it back to its roots that lead me to try and learn metaphysics until theres no answers
until i cant find the right questions

im not satisfied with not knowing things

I just did a layanalysis of symbolism for masturbation in Flip Flappers instead of work on one of the two papers I have due next week.

I've memed like I've never memed before. But alas, no meme lasts forever.

>>8676368
>Flip Fappers

>>8676374
Yes, it's literally all just her masturbating and trying to balance masturbation with school.

I feel like life has so much to offer. But still, I'm frequently afflicted with boredom and rely on alcohol to liven things up. I want to go to a museum soon. Hopefully on a date.

See that tower?
I'll get there
Will I get in it?
Of course not
I will forget every moment
And I'll be
Contempted
From everything

>>8669387
bad faith

Almost read Stoner to the end and just started Kierkegaard. Shit's good.
Maybe I am going to write short stories soon. Catch my fantasies and daydreaming up and release it on the paper.

>>8675317
We simply must accept everything happens to us.

I love you all, even if it turns out that we are all faggots

>>8668193
I'm ill. I don't have many days left. I don't think that I'll have enough time to finish my work.

My hands are weak

>>8678902
what do you have friend?

/lit/ is way better at giving helpful advice than /adv/.

I feel sublime. I try and talk but no one listens or they interrupt to talk about themselves. I thought the answer lies in meditation and self reassurance but I feel nothing. Maybe I'll just move idk

Why can't I get a girlfriend/boyfriend, it feels so lonely at night. I just want someone to watch movies and to discuss /lit/ books. Hug me /lit/

>>8678815
But we all are, m8. And there's nothing wrong with that.

>>8676279
Going to a phychologist helps, anon. It helped me. Do you want to talk about this things?

my brain isn't working properly today, can somebody plases help me find a word to capture something that "constantly runs out" asin "creativity constatnly runs out".
I have a word limit on what I'm writing and have been looking for something that is concise yet somewhat elegant.

Thanks

>>8679696
Elusive?

>>8679696
>deplete
>exhaust
>consume
>expend

i'm starting to grow frightful of 4chan's reach. i mean fucking /pol/ is influencing an american presidential election. i don't think i;m comfortable knowing our shitposts can potentially shape the future.

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After my last drinking bout, I've had heart palpitations every day. This has been going on for maybe 9 days. I went to the ER at one point. They released me, said to get a follow-up, not to drink, and I should be fine. They're full of shit.

I feel like my addictive behavior has ruined my health at a relatively young age, 25. I have no idea what I want. I'm not sure what my prospects are. And I'm terrified. I can't see a doctor before 9 days, and my insurance is about to run out. I probably need to go back to graduate school to have a career with solid insurance. Hell, I probably need to start looking at any careers that I might enjoy; I've never really looked at the specifics of jobs. I simply know I hate regular "job" jobs, and they're all I've ever had.

When my palpitations start, I get bouts of anxiety charged with existential terror, and I feel this void and sense of meaningless. The suicidal ideation creeps back into the periphery of my mind, and I wish I could feel anything else but feel all other feelings are lies. I have very little focus. I'm in the middle of 6 books right now and I'm reading none. I'm mindlessly watching Louie and posting on the god damn lit board. Christ.

I can't draw as well as I could. I went to a figure drawing session today, and I've regressed back to freshman year-level drawing. Fucking 101 level.

I miss adderall.
I can't even drink anymore.
I miss all the places I could hide from my feelings, all the places I could distract myself from actual work, from creation, from self-improvement, from the labor I need, I crave. I miss it all. I miss the drugs, the sadness, the rage, the isolation, the paranoia, the 6-substance-a-day habit, where all I had to manage was schoolwork and a perpetual hangover, the constant bender, noting the dosage of drug, the time I imbibed, the type and the effect, can I drive and can I interact and am I still human and oh my god at least I can write but I don't even have that when I can't focus and jesus christ what the fuck jesus christ oh my god oh my god oh my god oh my

And that. That whole progression again and again, and again. And I'm here doing nothing. Ahh. That felt kind of good.

It's a shame I work again tomorrow. And forever after. I need an endowment. I need to write a fucking BOOK. GOD DAMMIT I NEED CREATIVE INCOME. Which avenue do I take?

And we begin the cycle again. And again. And again.

And now the thing keeps trying to reject my post as spam, which is probably accurate in some way. What the fuck. Hope this works, an addendum. OH GOD THE WORST PART IS IT TELLS YOU NOTHING OF HOW TO FIX IT JESUS CHRIST

>>8679702
>>8679704
much appreciated

>>8679796
Now that`s what I call a depressing read.
As for the heart palpitations, I dunno, you should probably see a psychologist. They may very well be mini panic attacks or something like that.
That stream of consciousness was an interesting read.
All in all, I wish you the best, anon. If you need to talk about something, i`ll be here.

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>>8676279

Find your outlets, friend.

A shrink may help. I rejected them for years, lying at first then finding myself deeply mistrustful of them later on. Lately they have allowed me to vocalize my thoughts in better ways.

22-24 were my hardest years. I was living with my parents, going to school, and alone in my room as much as possible, drinking heavily, abusing adderall, and doing anything to run from the situation, which was concrete, which I could not fix. I was trapped.

I understand the distance between self and others as well. I have feelings, and I socialize, but I feel there's a detachment between the two. I'm still working on reconciling my many parts.

I feel love for you because of your situation. You may not be ready to change yet, and that's okay. But keep writing. Keep at the things that keep you sane. And when it's all too much, make the change.

In the meantime, make little changes in behaviors. Perhaps go out more, even to libraries. Read in new settings, eat something new, and try new digital outlets for socialization. I actually met an excellent Skype group via /lit/ once in a moment of luck. Exercise helped, too, and exploring novel media (namely podcasts during exercise, or audiobooks, etc)

I miss my long and natural color hair
I miss eating with pleasure not that I don't do it just that I don't feel hungry anymore

I have no one to tell truly how miserable am I. I have to in sort way tell everyone that I'm feeling better even though I feel worst than ever.
I miss talking with him through skype but we are in different continents and I don't have enough money and I don't have enough self- esteem to meet anyone yet I'm young and I hope to make a change.

>>8668193
I regret making this porno with my wife :(
http://www.pornhub.com/view_video.php?viewkey=ph55b2ec08ad5b1

>>8679966
>http://www.pornhub.com/view_video.php?viewkey=ph55b2ec08ad5b1
Thx m8, needed a good laugh


I can`t fucking sleep. I should be waking up at 6 AM (it`s 2:09). Insomnia is a bitch.

>>8679966
>tfw the king himself posts on /lit/

Boredom is a gift. The reason there are so many neckbeards and virgin men this generation is that boredom has been stolen from them. There are endless video games, endless TV shows, endless podcasts, endless mindless browsing on the internet. Always something to pique the interest. Always something to spark a little dopamine. Always something to put everyone in a lower state of consciousness. And with that, boredom has disappeared. And with boredom disappearing, so has pleasure in the little things in life such as taking a walk, going to the pool, listening to music, slowly enjoying a meal. With boredom disappearing, so has motivation and drive to get out there and meet new people, to try new things. Boredom is a gift. Cherish it.

Don't let anyone tell you loneliness comes all at once. It comes in cycles, slowly creeping up on you year after year.

>>8680004

drivel.

>>8680011
Enjoy your creature comforts.

When was the last time you were bored?

>>8680004
I think you fail to understand that constant stimulate fucks with your reward circuits. People are actually bored all the time now, much more than in the past, and they continuously need something more stimulating to alleviate their ever increasing boredom, which leads to the deep discontentment we see today.

>>8680047
Ok well that's at the core of what I was saying.

We're overstimulated nowadays.

I personally don't find reading to be overstimulating. I find it to have a positive effect on my psyche? What say you?

>>8680056
Neither do I. Reading forces you to sit down and focus on one activity for awhile, rather than constantly switching between multiple things. It's sad how many people don't have the attention span to read more than a few paragraphs anymore.

>>8680056
not him but i agree. i was gonna respond previously but that feeling you get when you finish a good novel and you learn to appreciate your surroundings a bit better, your thoughts are clearer, colors seem more vibrant and noises become more comprehensible and you feel more aware of everything going on around you

really good feeling desu
wish it lasted longer than a hour or two

My back hurts quite a bit,but I can't stop laying on this hot piece of iron.The glasses are too far away,out in the cold.I should make a rush for them,the desk is only a metre away from the bed anyways.
Scrambled eggs on toas with pepper powder and a nice cup of lemon tea.
Check the E-mails,go get the dictionary if.
What a quiet morning has this been.Not even the dogs are barking.
I shall get up by 9 'o clock,and have a fine day off.

>>8679631
I stand in solidarity with you anon, that's exactly whats on my mind.

Everything I say and do now is insipid. This crush is horridly paralysing, and utterly infantile, but the constant butterflies are a pleasant side effect.

>>8680332
awwwww
i want to have a crush now

>>8680329
Thank you anon. It's nice knowing I'm not alone in this. Maybe if I read more, I'll impress a patrician. I dunno. I just want to have someone to talk to when I need to.

>>8680348
Let me know if you ever wanna have a whiny text conversation. Good luck, I hope you find the sweet /lit/ person of your dreams.

>>8668193
War is nigh, we must prepare

>>8680351
I wish the same to you, anon.
How would we talk to eachother?

Writer's block, day I-don't-even-count-anymore.

Also hangover. The morning beer and aspirine kind. Trying to make sense of what I did this weekend. It's hard, I have to push myself to even think about it. I don't want to. But I have to, sooner or later.

Got drunk on friday. Puked. Got myself kicked out of the bar. Went to a club with friends afterwards. Took MDMA. Danced. Looked up at the ceiling, got lost in music. A girl grinded on me. I tried to imagine it was my "crush". Hushed the idea away: She wouldn't find herself in such a place. She's above that. Went to my friend's place. 5 of us. Smoked weed. Laid down on the carpet. Pure ecstasy, numb happiness. Singing along to the music. Fell asleep thinking about Her again. Wondered if I'd remember those moments and write about it later. I can't.

Go home the next morning. Sleep more. Drunk by the evening. Again. White Russians on ice. Hit the bar, meet with friends, chat with randoms. We all go to a park to smoke weed. Again. Grass instead of carpet, feels better. Went home with a girl. Slept on the same bed, no sex. Imagined it was Her. Hushed the idea away. Again. She wouldn't find herself in such a state.

Wake up, order breakfast, make coffee. Spend the morning with the girl. She's not my type, but attractive. Order a taxi for her. Sleep more. I want to go out. My usual group of friends don't want to come. 3rd day in a row, must've been hard on them. Ask out people I barely know. We go to a club. Not my kind of place. It doesn't try to hide its depravity with originality. Just a regular club. VIP section. Cocaine. Using a bit, don't want to overdo it. Energetic buzz, but no pleasure. Can't keep my mind off of her. Drink more. Wonder if I'll have a takeaway I can write about later. A realization that I can put into words.

Go home in the morning. Alone. Walk past church near my flat. I go in. Not because I want to, it just feels right. Not because of spirituality. Because it's too known of a cliché to miss. The hedonist looking for redemption. Walls are spinning. My feet are heavy. I go out. Pay attention to posture. Back is straight, arms are controlled, bounce in my steps. Don't show how fucked up I am. Might see Her. She lives nearby.

Sleep. More than before. Wake up. Beer and aspirine. Try to write. Can't. Try to read. Can't. Sit in front of computer. Left it on, lit is open in a tab. Find this thread. Force myself to go through the weekend. Feeling fresh but also tired. I can smell the club's smoke on my arms. Here I am.

>>8680352

Peace is merely the interval between wars.

>>8673610
>>8674194
just do it, it's fun.
buy clothes online, find a style that suits you.
get some nice shoes too. don't buy heels higher than about 3 inches until you're comfortable walking in them.
look at makeup tutorials on youtube.
remember looking good in women's clothes is not the same as looking like a woman.

>>8680456
Writer's block is a meme, I hope you realise this

>>8680482

I don't know what to write about. The ideas I have I can't put to text in the way I want to.

It wasn't like this before. What is this if not writer's block?

>>8680491
I didn't say it's not a thing. You just wrote, by the way. I thought your post is a meme, at first

All my life I lived fantasizing and imagining myself living scenarios that were sold to me by books and movies, and now I don't what is real and what's not. I set myself apart from society, and now I'll pay the price.

>>8680519

Well, in that case, I don't know how to feel about living the meme.

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>>8668193
I want to dance with a girl to the song 'Animal Farm' by The Kinks

Where does all this anxiety come from?

Why was I born needing drugs I cannot take?

>>8681684
You weren't born like this

>>8680471
But how to get a girl to pee on my face?

Asian girls like white guys
White girls like black guys
Black girls like black guys and white guys

Who likes Asian guys?

>>8682103
Other asian guys my dude

>>8682103
Some girls that are a little bit freak and into the kpop shit culture

>>8682103
Indian (native American) chicks

t. Asian Canadian

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This is the eighth time checking my Gmail. He won't message me back.

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>>8681695
get one of these

>>8682110
Asian girls like white guys
White girls like black guys
Black girls like black guys and white guys
And Asian guys like Asian guys

>>8682103
>White girls like black guys

[citation needed]

Ritus ac regem...

>>8682353
Don't play dumb.

>>8682401
Life is not porn.

>>8682409
Of course not.

>>8682401
Great fucking citation

I've got a 3 legged dog and I think it fucked up one of its remaining legs yesterday

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I'm torn between pursuing literature or furthering my skill in a science and mathematics with the intent of being a professor or researcher

>>8682704
Asian girls like white guys
White girls like black guys
Black girls like black guys and white guys

Who likes Asian guys?

>>8682734

if you're not smart enough to do both simultaneously, you're not gonna be super successful in either

I'm in the same boat

Kind of wish I studied archaeology and oceanography at college so I could scour the ocean depths in search of artifacts or something cool like that, instead of studying history and political science and having no job prospects.

>>8680466
War is merely the interval between cold wars.

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>>8668193
I have given up on ambition and I'm curious to see what happens. Rather I have given myself the purpose of "happiness," a purpose which I thought was worth sacrificing for some "higher" goal. Come to find out these "higher" goals which I had previously persuid are born out of anxiety and lonliness. So many have been sacrificed for some greater good for the many, so many have born ill fruit from sadness, it has become a common way for "success." Now, let's see what blossoms from this new way that I've chosen, one of order, of non confusion, of love rather than solitude, of meekness to beauty and sensitivity, of purity rather than manic chasing of red desire. Let's just see I guess.

>>8682801

all humans, even if they're not eccentric authors, have a need to desire some sort of unattainable thing or idea, man

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>>8682752
I understand that

I just feel like it's somehow wrong to pursue one goal (Academic career) as a means to fund another (Writing)

>>8682772
Same, every choice I make is the worst possible choice I could have made. Political science is fucking boring, but honestly so was every other choice. I could have at least chose something with actual job opportunities, but I don't plan on graduating anyway.

Fuck, drugs are awesome. Why don't more people do drugs?

>>8683877

because we already did too many and fucked ourselves up to the point we had to stop

>>8683887
Just do a different drug

the free world is about to be controlled by a someone who is criminally retarded regardless of the outcome. How is suicide not the answer here?

>>8680355
Hope you're still checking this thread. Skype or gchat I guess! Those seem like the most reliable options.

Damn it. A person who can't be happy and is simply pretending to smile is no different than a robot programmed to externalize joy. I may as well shut down.

>>8684145
I am! I have skype. It's kenshin2230, but how would I know it's you when you add me?

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>>8668799
I just wish I knew if she was fucking with me or if she likes me.

>>8675317
They tell us we must question everything. But if you truly do that you are left with nothing.

My life has been a bizarre mess. Brought up by parents with no passion, little sociability. Fell into existential despair at the age of seven, experienced bizarre almost inexplicable neurosis until the age of about 19, when they became deeply philosophical and realised nothing makes any sense. Found out I was actually fairly sociable person throughout university despite my genetics but it was too late and slipped into psychosis. Came out of it and came back to uni but slipped into psychosis again. Now I feel nothing think nothing.

I'm not sure if I'm going into denial because she seems to be wavering or if I'm feeling relieved because I really didn't like her all that much in actuality.

How can you tell the difference?

I thought I'm out of depression but it keeps coming back whenever I'm stressed out
When I drink it always results in amnesia

Suicidal thoughts are not present yet, but I can feel it will start set in slowly

Im 24, I want to do psychiatry and I cant function properly when I dont have this creative state of mind. I thought its about love but its not. I probably feel nothing. Fucking med school and fucking gloomy eastern europe

I have a pain in my side which i hope is indigestion. My mother finds me irritating. I'm ok at my job. I feel there is a direct correlation between my boredom and my loneliness. I'm thinking about which book i'm going to buy at waterstones on the way to the station after work.

>Black holes aren't necessities. They're luxuries.

-St. Thomas Aquinas

>>8682704
[citation needed]

>>8684600
I'll send you a message I guess?

I see many of the traits of school shooters in myself (and not just the "wah, I'm socially rejected ones) and it genuinely frightens me.

Something serendipitous happened, a true karmic boon, an act of God, a synchronicity, and I immediately; immediately; ruined it.

I just need help and feel quite isolated at the moment.
Everything and everyone is just getting on with "it", whilst i just lumber about aimlessly.
Also i cant stop lying? And i need to stop because its just causing me more grief

it's not alcoholism if it's not every day, right?

>>8686420
Which of those traits do you see in yourself?

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I don't think I could ever be a proper...person? human? I dunno. I feel like more of a really shitty self teaching AI and I have to pretend as if I'm a real person when I'm really not. I don't have a personality, I don't have any distinct thoughts or feelings about things, it's so scary and frustrating. I just want to be someone, anyone at all. I'm just...a whole bunch of nothing and it's all terribly boring

>>8686506
appreciation for kmfdm and marilyn manson

I'm such a piece of shit. What are those fits of rage? Breaking shit like a teenager, getting angry for nothing, I'm a burden to everyone. I need to get my ass kicked.

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>>8686522
step right up, kiddo

>>8686538
Please kill me, you're doing the world a favor.

I am not alive. I am dead, I am not alive. We don't realize we're dead, we're a dream. I don't move when my arm moves, when I type this. I view my fingers move across the keys I don't control it. I'm far away now, on the other side. I don't feel, I don't feel.
I'm tethered to this earth. People, people attach you, stick you to reality like fly paper. I need a person to stick to. Any person. I want to be alive. I want to be here.

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>>8686549
you asked for it!

>>8686509
I hope you're not the anon I replied to. I know people whose moms listen to Manson. He was edgy in the 90s but I wouldn't consider being a fan as a precursor to mass murder. Same with KMFDM. I didn't know very many KMFDM fans back in the day, but after listening to several albums' worth of their music, I figure their fan base these days is largely people who wish Nickelback sounded more like Depeche Mode. Again, not exactly bedwetting and setting puppies on fire. It's just music. Relax and enjoy what you enjoy.

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>>8686564

>>8670977
>The idea of being in a perpetual state of sleep, or the state we were in (figuratively speaking) before we were born, is comfy as fuck.

But cant you only appreciate the depth or comfiness of the sleep when you are awake again?
No one actually experiences sleep, just the feeling of being awake after a solid or uncomfortable sleep. Perhaps im wrong idk.

>>8686522
Not sure who said it but "Violence is sometimes the result of one being unable to fully articulate ones despair"

>>8676283
Not a good idea.

>>8686506
Original anon here. >>8686509 wasn't me.

I've abused almost all the pets my family had in one way or another and I've found myself very willing to harass and mistreat people I know on a personal level, sometimes on a daily basis. I've hurt almost all the people I've loved at some point, to the point that I've had a serious falling out with almost every friend I've ever had. I was somewhat of a recluse in high school (though no, I didn't listen to Marilyn Manson. Townes Van Zandt and Bob Dylan were my angst heroes). I was abused by my mother's side of the family to a certain extent, she kicked me in the head when I was seven years old (I don't remember the experience myself but I'm told it was a hard kick), my uncle choked me, my grandpa used to call me a dumb ugly piece of shit (I'm paraphrasing but just barely, he used all of those words to describe me at one point or another, just not all at the same time) etc. I often find myself dwelling on the past, I find it incredibly hard to connect with others (and I don't think I've ever cried for another's circumstance). I have no control over my anger when it comes out, etc.

I'm not saying any of this with pride, I'm terrified that I can recognize all of these traits in myself. The only ones I don't really have are wetting the bed and having an interest with violent behavior. I can be a violent person, but it's not like I fantasize about it, it just comes out and I'm not self-aware enough to stop it when it does.

>>8686481

but it is, anon

You're an alcoholic.

Marlon Brando was so sexy.

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>>8668193
What is on my mind? I have read many concepts that I find intriguing, yet extraordinary. Naturalism, the voyage of the beagle, religion, God, many more. The idea of questioning my own reality is probably the most important thing that flies through my mind day after day. I ponder, I examine, I then journey for evidence.

I don't have what it takes to be called a 'man', I'll be forever a cowardly boy, emasculated and incompetent.

asDF GFEHdgf fse dgfsdgf words are inferior to pure thought WATCH THIS a<sdcfsdf asg dfgh q358 q

>>8688647
Deep

what are you supposed to do after sex if you dont smoke?

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>>8688977
Nice dubs, and go write.

>>8688977
Coffee.

Milky, cool, and bottled.

>>8688977
Clean your dick, piss.

>>8689011
WOW
CHECK
EM

>>8689007
OMG
ITS
JAMES
BOND

God damn I'm faded as shit right now

>>8669171

>implying piano and reading aren't educational.

>>8669301

The Century of The Self as Adam Curtis put it in the title of his documentary.

Apparently living like a NEET isn't comfy at all. I'm preparing for university next year and i'm just bored out of my mind, holy shit, I'm so empty.

>>8670319

Pro tip: ADHD isn't real.

>>8670319
globalist interpretation: it's actually about an autistic sperglord

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>>8688580
>ywn look as good as Marlon Brando wearing a white tee
>ywn be amongst the ranks of famed hollywood actors like James Dean and McQueen

why live fampai

>>8689170
It creates lethargy and depression-like symptoms for many. NEEThood begins to destroy your soul after a while.

Liquor now free

Why didn't she write me all day? And why am I waiting in the first place? Nothing will come out of it.

I love the kitchen life.

Always trading food for drinks from the bar. Closing down a shitty night with a beer is always the best feeling.

Being with your homies when its 5 minutes to close and having a 8/10/15 top all walk in at the same fucking time.

The feels when you come in and the guy before hasn't done shit all for prep or even fucking cleaned/refilled/flipped a god damn thing for you. 911s out the ass and doing everything on the fly just to close and leave it better than the ass fuck who left it for you.

Constantly talking shit to everyone around, head out to the bar after close just to drink and talk more shit.

The industry has my heart and I don't think of doing anything else.

The people I work with are my brothers and sisters. I wouldn't want to go through the weeds with anyone else. Bonded by blood and flame.

>>8674419
dis

We are now in the year 2016, the entire world seems to be moving toward wirelessness. Will the personal computer and laptop become obsolete technology?

Will we all be able to interface with a giant supercomputer, such as the Beast in Belgium, by way of micro-electronic handheld technology? This is an interesting concept to seriously consider. Will we all have the ability to access and process information by mobile telephones, or some type of miniture handheld technology? This will become a possibility.

Software and computer companies all over the planet are investigating and researching the possibilities and application of wireless information technology. Asia and Europe at this time are at the forefront in the race of wireless information exchange. North and South American companies are working fanatically to play catch-up in the world of wireless infomation networks.

NTT-DoCoMo, the innovators of the I-Mode cellular telephone who have approximately 13 million Japanese linked to the information superhighway are in the leadership position for this type of technology. People can now transmit electronic mail, check financial activity and browse the internet through their mobile phones. But this is just the tip of the iceberg as far as possibilities are concerned.

Imagine one day of having the activity to accomplish all your daily tasks anywhere at any time without having to be at a particular location to achieve a certain task. In today's fast paced society people want unlimited flexibility and mobility, this is now mandatory for virtually every aspect of human progress.

Almost everyone possesses a cellular telephone, and the subscription number is expanding exponentially. One day we will all be wireless and this is a fact. One day we will be able to do almost everything by remote control, with a multiple array of digital handheld devices.

What will the implications be for humanity?

Who will benefit and who will suffer?

These are the important questions that we as a society must seriously ask ourselves.

We are all atomic and sub-atomic particles, and we are all wireless, for now.

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I know no fear, for the greatest terror in all the vast reaches of the stars is this nightmare from which I can not wake. A thousand souls would scream from the deepest pits of hell if they only knew but a fraction of this unending, inmeasurable pain. They say a wet man does not fear the rain. How, then, can one cursed such as I fear anything at all?

I remember now. You don't ever actually learn anything. You just remember it all. We're all already dead. I am interfacing with existence on a level of pure acceptance. A wanderlust cursor. Surfing patterns of information.

I can't stay here forever, but it's nice to have that exact glimpse of ouroburos every once in a while.

>implying I'm not on the second plateau

>>8680841
That is one of my favorite albums. Good choice

>>8689253
She just doesn't care and if she (you) thinks they are not just messaging you back is because I don't know they are busy or want to be seen as they dont care even though she ''thinks'' she truly does, at the end is not like that. I'm sorry.

I saved a picture of that sexy anime woman before the mod deleted it.

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>>8689794

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I don't know how to live. I'm stuck in this bizarre limbo state of being whereby I can't decide if I should just live naturally and respond organically to the stimuli in my universe and suffer regret because of my imperfections, or if I should meticulously micromanage every single action and moment in my life as to spare myself any possible wish that I could have done things differently. The former may be living more truthfully, but the latter has brought me some appreciable happiness. I don't know what to do. I feel like I'm lost in a celestial soup whereby my mind is slowly melting. I've become broken as a person, I think. Like the eggshell has cracked and the yolk is pouring out.

God I miss her.

Pic unrelated.

Everyone has thought of death but the thought that not everyone has thought of killing themselves is something I can't wrap my mind around/

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I wish the technology was there to erase someone from your brain. Every time I have a dream or think of waking up next to her, everything turning sour, and then never seeing her again I basically enter a mind fog that destroys my libido and gives me a creeping sense of malaise.

How the fuck did my love life become the plot to eternal sunshine of the spotless mind

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Humans
Are Aliens
We are space people
But yet the GNUta rises
EONS OF EXISTENCE
THE CELL
THE ORGANIC PROCESS DIGITIZED
Technology must be one with nature
Hieroglyphs scour the earth yet we do not see
Vast spaces of sky, open yet closed
In this plane, beings are imbued with life force that they do not understand and do not explore
Only when a bird is released from its cage, it can fly
Close the world
Open the next
GNU
FUTANARI
THE ESSENCE OF PERFECTION IS SEEN, YET UNKNOWN
IT'S TRUE NATURE A MYSTERY
TO ALL BUT THE ENLIGHTENED ONES
THE ANCIENT WAYS HAVE BEEN WASHED AWAY WITH THE BLOOD OF THE PEOPLE, LOST
A CULTURE, TYRANNICAL, REPLACED IT
THE ONLY WAY OUT
Birth
Life
Death
The Bardos will guide
The Shaman will guide
But WE must seek our own LIFE FORCE

What the fuck am I even doing here? Where do I go next? Why do I care less and less? I just want to leave and drink and smoke and fuck.

>>8692846
hedonism is a shitty meme

It’s a hand on the back
Of your sweat matted head. All the grime slicked
Around your hair. It massages the crown in revolutions
Long lovely caresses
Down to the nape, every third rotation a pinch or twist.
It rubs your ears, keeps you facing down.
It’s the only thing that touches you.
The only thing that knows you.
Licks your earlobes like a lover
Tongues your neck like it knows whats best
Keep me in the dark, eyes in your lap. Warm bony legs.
Just touch my face. Just pet my head
Just believe me when i say i have no one to turn to
Just believe me when i say i want to die
Leave me limp on your couch, on your bed
Let you sing me into oblivion. Leave me to the interior
Let let let let let
It happen - You happen

i just wanna go home. i feel ashemed and scared. i wanna go back to my parents and start university my i can't trust myself. i don't to spend the rest on my life in a dark corner taking pills.

>>8668193

I want to drink unwatered wine until I spew a purple gout across the flagstones of the Hindustani temple after the night action, on the banks of the Hydaspes.

Even in erotic dreams I'm failure with women.

I'm trapped with a woman who is slowly becoming her mother.

She talks about her job 24/7 and nothing interesting, yet expects me to remember there names and actions.

I never tell her what I do during my day and it bothers her. Only does she know all I do is shit post about her on a panamian denim riveting forum.

>>8668193
>yfw your post is the last one in every thread and the thread dies

>>8695278
Not this time

>>8689862
cute, CUTE

I hope I can find the strength to refuse the coke tonight.

She is too young for me (but above age of consent).
She often gets angry at me.
She looks gorgeous.
She is fragile.
I don't want to destroy her.

I love her.
She loves me.

>>8670951
good thing that you're only becoming, then

I finally broke it off with my gf last night. It was something that I've felt I had to do for a while now. Anons, am I an asshole if pursue relations with another qt immediately after coming out of a 3 year relationship? Should I feel more remorse than I do? Will I?

>>8689170
well, no shit. He's a sad frog for a reason

I don't think I'd put any woman in the embarrassing, soul-crushing situation of having sex with me, ever.

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Fifty sack in my sock, I don't give a fuck
I don't give a fuck, I don't give a fuck
Fifty sack in my sock, I don't give a fuck
I don't give a fuck, I don't give a fuck
Fifty sack in my sock, I don't give a fuck
I don't give a fuck, I don't give a fuck
Fifty sack in my sock, I don't give a fuck
I don't give a fuck, I don't give a fuck


Hit the plug, thousand what I drop
Thousand on a drop, Thousand what I cop
Hit the night, that is all I got, that is all I got
But it's not enough
What you want from me you look sus
Wanna be like us, but you're fucking not
Turning up, that is what I love, that is what I love
That is what I love

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Does long distance relationships ever work?

>>8686735
pretty sure it was slovenian meme-man senpai

>>8696138
Depends what kind of relations. If you started dating immediately you'd look like a bit of a cunt, give it a week or two. If you're just having sex it's kinda expected I think. Ultimately up to you though.

>>8697114
>no penis in vagina

I don't want to sound crass or anything, but no.

>>8697199
What about if I don't care about it

>>8697204
But the other person might care about intimacy, and drift apart sooner or later.

>>8697204

they will tho

>>8697212
>>8697218

So how long it's supossed to be in a long distance relationship without wanting some intimacy? Have any of you had any experience?

>>8668193
I think my wretched thoughts are reaching critical mass but I don't know if I have the heart to hang myself. There must be some resolution but I don't know where it will come from. I'm ashamed to live my life and twice ashamed to hide from it.

i want to rob a drug dealer like im omar little

also none of the posts i make on 4chan are traced back to me but i still feel uncomfortable that theyre lingering out there somewhere on the archives

i want all my presence to be deleted from the internet i want to have every record i existed gone and every memory of me deleted

我快要杀死我自己。我必须做这,可是我不知道为什么。
请帮我

>>8697268
who is behind this post

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>>8697273

Me está saliendo una muela del juicio y no dejo de pasarme la lengua por ahí, siento como si volviera a tener 9 años o algo así, donde recuerdo que a causa de eso me salieron los dientes horribles de conejo que tengo en estos momentos.

Been following this guided journalism exercise which gets you to think over your life. I was kind of skeptical at first, but I think it's helping me to understand things about myself that I otherwise wouldn't have if I didn't take the time to reflect upon, and more importantly, articulate the significant moments of my life. I'm starting to really see what made me who I am. I just hope it helps me decide where I will go. I'm so sick of being aimless and neurotic

>>8697114
No. They can but not for long.

>>8697331
How long is enough

>>8668193
*thread being almost nine days on*

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I've reached a point in my life where I have unlimited hypothetical freedom. I no longer feel obligated to obey social or moral rules. Yet I have no idea how to use this freedom. I am trapped in the suburbs somewhere in Europe, and I fear that even leaving this place won't help me pursue my pleasures. Everyone here is repressed bourgeois scum. I have no one by my side to transcend boundaries with. Pic related I guess.

>>8696048
>she is too young for me
A girl can never be too young anon

>>8686968
>>8686481
i have decided to forsake solitary drinking

poisoned by horrible ways, admidst the pain