Favorite Opening Lines General

"Mr. and Mrs. Dursley of number four, Privet Drive, were proud to say that they were perfectly normal, thank you very much."

A penis comes across the sky.

"Snow-Balls have flown their Arcs, starr'd the Sides of Outbuildings, as of Cousins, carried Hats away into the brisk Wind off Delaware,-- the Sleds are brought in and their Runners carefully dried and greased, shoes deposited in the back Hall, a stocking'd-foot Descent made upon the great Kitchen, in a purposeful Dither since Morning, punctuated by the ringing Lids of Boilers and Stewing-Pots, fragrant with Pie-Spices, peel'd Fruits, Suet, heated Sugar,-- the Children, having all upon the Fly, among rhythmic slaps of Batter and Spoon, coax'd and stolen what they might, proceed, as upon each afternoon all this snowy December, to a comfortable Room at the rear of the House, years since given over to their carefree Assaults."

So damn comfy.

"I'm Ishmael."

All this happened, more or less.

"Call me Israel"

You're dead.

Waking up to a loud crash rarely means something good is happening.

>>8638628

For sale: umbilical cord, only swung like a lasso once.

>>8638863
Underrated post.

Buck Mulligan, the fatso, came down the stairs majestically, shaving gear in his hand.

>>8638628

Big fat Muck Bulligan had a shave

>>8638905
Perfect.

>>8638628
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xisBERxHJ6g

I hopped in the taxi and told him "To the cereal store my good man!"

Thirty years ago Marseilles lay burning in the sun, one day.

>>8638628

My mother always called me "Little Shit." because that's how she described giving birth to me; like taking one, gigantic, teeth grinding, straining shit as if she was constipated.

Erhabener Geist, im Geisterreich verloren!

>>8638628
Christ just fucking learn Latin

>>8638628
Penises dipped in cereal.

>>8638628
Many years later, as he faced the firing squad, Colonel Aureliano Buendía was to remember that distant afternoon when his father took him to discover ice.

>>8640054

"Once upon a time and a very good time it was there was a moocow coming down along the road and this moocow that was coming down long the road met a nicens little boy named tuckoo..."

>>8638628

I told you I could fit a cheerio around my penis