Is this any good?

>>8470772
I'll critique it in a bit. I'm busy right now.

>>8470790
Thank you.

>>8470790
>>8470822
I'm not going to lie anon, it's pretty bad. It reads like something i'd find on /r/writingprompts.

Everything else aside, the punctuation is pretty juvenile.

> She’s not coming. None of my purple passages or words could possibly woo her. My email is a barren wasteland (Maybe she forgot to send it? Or could it be Him already?

She's not coming: none of my purple passages or words could possibly woo her; my email is a barren wasteland--Maybe she forgot to send it?--, or could it be Him already?

Would be an example of higher tier punctuation; though, punctuation is entirely subjected to prose.

>Scenarios like this are all too familiar, God has punished me before like this. Spiking down my serve, effortlessly propelling it back onto my side of the court saying

Scenarios like this are all too familiar: God has punished me like this before: spiking down my serve, and, effortlessly, propelling it back into my court, saying

also notice how I removed "my side of the court," this is redundant, and already implied with just the word court and the preceding metaphor.

>“Think about all you’ve done. You blew it again! Not picking up on the nuances I had floated to you by each and every girl you have come in contact with. Clearly you don’t understand His purpose!”

"Think about all you've done--you blew it, again!--, not picking up on the nuances I had floated to you with each girl that you've come into contact with; clearly you don't understand His purpose!"

Each and every is a cliche, and also bad writing, so I removed it.

This is just to give you a general idea. And also my opinion, there's no "best" when it comes to punctuation.

I'm glad to see more aspiring writers here, who are not afraid to share their work. Keep practicing, friend.

>>8470944
Thank you anon, you have done me a great service. I will get better.

>>8470944
>She's not coming: none of my purple passages or words could possibly woo her; my email is a barren wasteland--Maybe she forgot to send it?--, or could it be Him already?

This is horrible. Don't ever abuse punctuation like this, OP.

>>8471086
The second dash was a bit much, but the rest is fine, and pretty standard. I'm not sure what you find wrong with punctuation and sentence structure that you'd find in any well written modern/post-modern work.

But yes, the OP should find what works best for him, as I stated.