>if i forced on you a scalpel would you use it as i say i’ll

If you're goona post shitty poetry at least use decent formatting

>>8437348
1/3rd in it dawned on me that it was Death Grips

>>8437372
Please, this is some voluptuous contemporary poetry and you're too stubborn to dull your /lit/ edge to appreciate it

File: j-moore.jpg (30KB, 303x305px) Image search: [Google]

30KB, 303x305px

>>8437348
Does the female form make you uncomfortable, Mr Lebowski?

This is the best I've seen from her.I'm not a fan of feminist/identity political poetry at all, but this is not too bad.
If she worked on her rhythm a bit more (maybe write meteical poetry for a bit) and lost some of her edge she could be a decent poet.

>>8437398
Free verse poets with no respect or understanding for metre are the absolute worst.

>>8437407
Yes I agree. Every poet should master (at least to some degree) metrical poetry before writing free verse.

>>8437348
good lord I want her to blow me so bad. she is not going to age well lol.

>>8437407
And nigga, that's all I see on "critique" threads, fffs. I don't know how long those threads have remained as such, but they're just like, a collection of inordinate writers who can't fucking sop the idea that meter isn't limitation or inhibition to meaning and I'm never going to post my verse on those shits. si..gh...

>>8437425
To quote from a poem of hers prior,

"One man told me I have good 'blow-job eyes'"

if i forced on you a scalpel would you use it as i say
i’ll sit still while you penetrate and slowly slice the flesh away
milking from my skull with your acquiescent touch
burrow deeper, quickly, faster at any moment
this’ll be too much for me to take
clutching arm as you descend latex stings,
drill bit sings digging into brain until it bends
now, please, for me i’ll say, with incandescent whine
extract my anger from the sinew
pluck my lust
destroy my pride
do these things make me a man asks my ego,
lurid leech latching fast onto the stem with my malice
and my greed my contempt does me no favours
tied tight to intensity it looks too much like passion
so they’re all taken from me with a swoop and rip assertion
dead after ire cunning cut from contemplation
so this is what they all admire and then
fill the empty space with some cotton and some web
stitch me up with twine tie a bow atop my mangled head
and then everything’s fine

>>8437425
That's part of the attraction, fleeting beauty.

Wat

>>8437388
Vagina.

>>8437398

It's awful. But not for the reasons>>8437407
suggests.

Rather than elicit feelings like malice or contempt through metaphor, imagery, or objective correlatives, she just throws them in the poem willy-nilly

this girl is amazing and i agree with everything she says.

>>8437372
>Implying it was ever formatted by the author

I only remember the 'cumshot mise en scene' picture.

>>8437488
I thought this was Death Grips. Either way it's shit.