Therapist assignment

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>250 words essay for therapist, due tomorrow
>haven't started yet

>>7386645
Screw your therapist, go do something fun

Write about dragons

>>7386645
Write about a therapist who wants to bang their patient and they ask for a page of writing in hopes that the patient will make the first move
Add hints that the therapist is your therapist obv and the patient the therapists's mother

>>7386662
Screwing my therapist would be fun.

This assignment is supposed to help me with my anxiety over sharing my writing with people I know. I write about things that my relatives and friends would probably hate me for, which is why I'm anxious about sharing it with them, so I'm not sure how this is supposed to help exactly, but I'm doing it anyway.

>>7386670
Probably a good starting point, thanks anon.

>>7386672
Nice twist, I won't do it for the assignment but I'll probably write it anyway.

Anyone else quit therapy after only three-four sessions ? I don't know where mine thought she would bring me with CBT but it sounded like an awful waste of time and money.

>>7386677
>I write about things that my relatives and friends would probably hate me for
Then take a deep breath and go all out on everything they would hate.
Write a full page of it, then proudly show them your work.

Write about how psycoanalytics and therapists only exist to reinforce the repressive Oedpial triangle and and lock you in repressive capitalist neurosis for the rest of your life.

>>7386689
I've kept going because I basically have to. Everyone would freak out if I quit, especially my psychiatrist. Although it is nice to have someone who legally can't tell anyone your dirt unless you're homi- or suicidal.

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>>7386689
Your therapist tried cock and ball torture on you also?!?

>>7386696
I'd probably get hospitalized. I write a lot about suicide, mass murder, serial murder/rape, and torture. I also write some light fantasy stuff, which I'm somewhat willing to share with people I know.

>>7386706
Do you think we go to the same doctor ? ;-)

I like the dragon idea, and I also want to feature Christmas, 50s culture in America, and serial murder. How should I combine them?

>>7386733
a dragon has been killing Santas year on year in the fifties
people are getting sick of this shit (at some point mention that it's in black & white) so they send the dragon to see a therapist
years later, dragon dildoes ensue

>>7386755
Sounds fun, I'll try it. Probably leaving out the dragon dildos part because she has no sense of humor.

>>7386716
Which one is yours? That might be the case ;-)

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>>7386770
they're a real thing though

You should start off the paper by describe to us how he/she looks. ;)

>>7386800
Right, but it would go over her head and when she looked it up, she would think it was a fetish of mine. I might do it anyway.

>>7386803
She's caucasian, short - probably 5'0", slightly chubby, and has wavy, dark brown hair, and a fairly pretty face that is mainly attractive because of her glasses. She's slightly reminiscent of a fox that's just given birth to a litter.

It's not going in the story because she knows what she looks like and she won't be included in it anyway.

>>7386653
>250 words
that's so easy, I want to die. what is wrong with you?

>>7386702
xD

Just print this thread

>>7386821
Pic for reference? make you and her Anthropomorphous in the story and use that thing about how the female fox gives birth to the litter ;)

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>>7386800
What the fuck man. Who's sticking those up their holes?

>>7386838
Your mum to be honest family.

>>7386836
Pretty good idea. Postmodern and all that.

A whole novel of printed threads would be interesting, as long as the threads had some sort of meaning, like epitomizing Internet trends or something.

>>7386837
I don't have any pics of her.

The idea of writing furry erotica is more than a little uncomfortable, even without the characters, which means I should probably try it at some point, but not for the assignment.

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>>7386850
She's usually too busy stuffing herself with booze

>>7386867
Lol well I was thinking something a bit more classy to the point I wouldn't classify it as "furry erotica". Lol I want to get into your head now though for the heck of it. I'm a boring moderately well adjusted person soooooo that's no fun.

>>7386882
I'm not sure how to make a story involving erotica and anthropomorphic animals classy, though, and I don't really want sexual content.

In what way would you like to get into my head?

>>7386867
you're cheap and poplit and you will never be anything significant.

a bullshit rationalization for a bullshit concept.

your deification of the act is in no way "postmodern" or "intellectual," much more in the line of "going to a concert in bushwick and claiming that everything carries a downwards tilt towards death"-esque bullshittery that is so often found among youth who have gleaned from elliptical readings of derrida or benjamine something vaguely reminiscent of "literary criticism."

no no no it is time to put an end to such things.

i'm putting my boot down, right now.

the synthesis of a thread -- or perhaps the larger image board -- within the parameters of an un-circumvented text would suggest narrative discrepancy, an epistolary integrity that affects a reader's ability to properly conceive of "plot" and/or "structure" and/or "tension/drama." Perhaps, and with proper design, the very text could be self-remediary, focusing guilt externally no upon the reader but upon his/her unanimous ability to collide texts without end. things would naturally err towards unreadability; however, only in such an incomprehensible latitude would the origination of "true meaning" gain a center.

>>7386653
>250 words essay
This is like the easiest shit ever.
You've probably already type more than that posting on /lit/ rather than actually doing your essay.

>>7386942
Is this a modified pasta?

>>7386959
That isn't me (OP), just someone else posting a meme.

My therapist actually has me writing two single-spaced pages a day, with an intentional disregard for form or style. Just sort of stream-of-consciousness, I guess. Which entirely makes sense for a psychoanalysis-based practice.

>>7386976
no but u can have it. it is urs.

>>7386990
thanks

>>7386979
Do you find it helpful? I've tried stuff like that on my own and I've always been too distracted by the act of physically writing it down for my thoughts to really flow.

>>7386892
Just know everything about you and learn how you think. Ya know, what your shrink is probably doing right now?

>>7386995
If I can get it done, definitely.

Usually though it doesn't take the form of me really setting aside time to write, as I would for an essay or short story. They tend to be more poetic, than really "auto-biographical," or whatever. I don't know, it is that familiar sort of, you know, "passionate need" to write that I like to have verified in therapy, which sounds really weird to say, I guess.

I don't know. I'm mostly in because I've fallen out of "the craft." Though that acts more as a symptom than really just an entirely bullshit "psychiatric condition" known easily as "writer's block." Maybe such a thing will be in DSM's everywhere soon enough, along with any other slight discomfort we might need validated, but yeah writing helps. It always does. You gotta take back that monologue from the static buzz.

>>7387008
That would probably take a while. Not that I'm particularly deep and complex, just that it's hard to know much about a person without lots of face-to-face interaction.

>>7387010
Interesting. I'll give it another try.

What I do for writer's block is listen to music, read poetry, and have many projects going on at once so that when I'm stuck on one, it's likely that I'll find inspiration for another. Obviously this wouldn't work for everyone, but it's always helped me.

I've started the story. Unfortunately, just describing the setting is taking up most of a page. Maybe she won't mind if I go over into 1.5 pages.

Part I of the Great American Novel

Winter,
small town,
snowing,
people.
There is a relaxed sort of bustle; everyone’s out of their houses, but everyone’s home. Obscuring windows, procuring presents; eating at diners, cheating at checkers. Everything is black-and-white because color did not really exist until 1953, and this is two years before that.
Winter holidays approach and Thanksgiving is in the near but apparently distant past. Christmas reigns supreme in the minds of the children, and the minds of the children reign supreme in the minds of the parents and grandparents. The great-grandparents are dead.
Spring is birth, summer is sex, autumn is death. Winter is… what?
This town is called Harperville, named for the Harper family that died out after their final reproductive ray of light was a homosexual.
Harper,
homo,
Santa!
Dragon?
Yes, dragon. Harperville has a unique issue: a dragon. A huge one that guts people with its claws and doesn’t even eat them, just leaves them to bleed out, then retreats to God-knows-where (we can hope He does, at least).
He only targets a very specific group of people, however, and only strikes for one month or so out of the year. Mr. Dragon has a thing for killing men who wear red-and-white suits with pointy hats and who say “Ho, ho, ho, Merry Christmas!” He hates them and wants them all to die painfully. His only joy lies in envisioning a future with no Santas in Harperville.
The people of Harperville have named him the Antisanta.


“He shall speak pompous words against Christmas, shall persecute the saint of Christmas, and shall intend to change times and law. Then the saint shall be given into his hand for a time and times and half a time.”

The people of Harperville (Harpervillians?) have decided that they’ve had enough of the Antisanta’s shit by this point - the routine’s been going on for five years - but there’s really nothing that a bunch of rednecks and a couple of rich folks can do against a dragon that can turn invisible or escape to another dimension or something. The logical thing to do, then, is to send it to a shrink.

>>7387219
Part II of the Great American Novel - the thrilling conclusion

The Antisanta has a cell phone in his stomach from when the last Santa futilely threw it at him, and it’s been lodged there for long enough to cause a bit of discomfort, which is exacerbated when it begins to vibrate. He adjusts his gut a bit to answer the call, and sends his ears down to his stomach to hear the call.
“Hello?” says a woman’s voice.
The Antisanta tries to speak to the woman, but all the way down in his guts, it sounds like the rumbling of a train across tracks made of brick.
She continues, audibly nervous. “There’s a… meeting. Of Santas.” Pause. “It’s in Harperville along main street. Lots of Santas.” Pause. “Please… please kill the Santas. They’re… a real menace. And you’re big and strong and manly and-”
The Antisanta hangs up and flies out of his lair in the moon. He propels himself forward through the vacuum by turning around backward and breathing fire toward the moon.
The meeting is there, on the main street; dozens of Santas are lined up in rows, like fat communists in a gas chamber. The Antisanta breathes fire down upon them, scorching them into… firewood?
He pauses in mid air. Wood. It’s a setup, he supposes, but not a very good one, because nothing on earth can harm him.
From a nearby building, a slight, old woman approaches, wearing all white, save for green-and-red Christmas earrings.
She begins by asking him how he’s doing, and he answers that he’s fine. They get to talking; turns out their favorite baseball team is the Kentucky “Fried Chickens”. Finally, the little woman gets to the point - why kill Santas?
“Well,” he says, “The Santa hatred has been an important aspect of my family for generations. It’s-” he pauses; molten tears begin to form: “It’s the only way I can make my father proud. I… I was never like him. He always goes on about how delicious deer are, and I just can’t relate. The only hobby I have that he ever cares about is killing Santas in Harperville.”
The lady tears up a bit, too, recalling her own father’s obsession with skinning mice. “Let’s be each other’s fathers,” she says. “I don’t like eating deer, either. But you’ll have to give up killing Santas.”
The Antisanta nods, and agrees to the terms; he accepts the name “Bart”, as well.
All the townsfolk, great and small, pour out onto the main street, throwing rice for some reason along with pricy flowers from Anne’s Florists.
They cheer, and drink toasts, out in the middle of the road.
And Bart burns them all to death in one giant barbecue special event, every single one, and he doesn’t eat them, because he only eats deer.
See, he’s a time traveller. He is his own father.

het einde

Now, I should write sequels featuring every plot germ posted in this thread.

write the dumbest shit that makes no sense, capitalize every word
When she asks a question tense up and when she does it again start crying and rub your taint through your pants.

>>7386689
I think it's great. It's really nice to talk to someone neutral about my life, feelings, relationships, etc.

People seem to talk a lot about how therapy didn't fix them or help them. For me, it's extremely helpful to articulate my problems to someone neutral. It really is an amazing resource.

Friends and family are important, but their biases and perspectives are often intertwined with yours, which can make talking to them difficult.

If you can afford therapy, I'd recommend going with the mindset I outlined above. You don't need specific goals to be benefitted by therapy. Of course what works for me won't work for everyone.

Have a good day, everyone.

>>7387997
I already wrote dumb shit that makes no sense, but capitalizing everything is too much effort. I might try the performance aspect of this approach, though.