Mild autism, sexual deviancy and unhinged ramblings

>>8836536
Transgender individuals are gay men with autism + straight men who get off on crossdressing.

You are just a gay guy.

>>8836555

>You are just a gay guy.
b-b-b-but im jacking off to straight porn right now...

>>8836572
Stop repressing.

>>8836580
Why are you so sure that I'm gay?

>>8836673
You wouldn't be on here if you weren't.

>>8836716
I haven't been in here for a while thought, recently I've been heavy into /pol/. I get kinda upset or pissed when I think people are asking if I have a girlfriend or that I like girls, kinda like they're digging to see if I'm a gay.

I've told my family that I might be gay, that was some time ago, now I just ignore it. And I don't like when they say one day I'll find a "partner".

I just don't like the idea of people I know seeing me as gay, whether it be coworkers, people from school or acquaintances. I also feel kinda mentally fucked, maybe it just depression, anxiety and weekend binge drinking. I don't know. I just feel so lost from every aspect of life.

Maybe too much porn. Have you seen the yourbrainonporn links that brit anon always posts in gay threads on /pol/?

https://www.yourbrainonporn.com/are-fetishes-innate
https://www.yourbrainonporn.com/are-sexual-tastes-immutable

I disagree with him that it's applicable to all guys with same sex attraction but it sounds like it might be a fit for you. A lot of the guys telling their stories were only aroused by gay porn because there was some element of humiliation involved. It seems to be a progression from bdsm (w/male sub) and cuck porn.

Also, could it be thst your desire to cuddle with men is simply platonic?

OP where do you live

>>8837260
>A lot of the guys telling their stories were only aroused by gay porn because there was some element of humiliation involved. It seems to be a progression from bdsm (w/male sub) and cuck porn.

Not OP, but this seems like me. I'm very submissive. It's not humiliation per se, but I want to suck dick and embrace someone bigger, stronger than myself. I don't find the majority of guy's faces attractive though.

>>8836748
Accept being gay and you will be happier.

>>8837260
> Also, could it be thst your desire to cuddle with men is simply platonic?

No, I don't think so. I've done it before and it was pretty cash. I keep having this fantasies about having my best friend with my in my room jacking off together while on the laptop. I get boners describing it.

>>8837273
In Scandinavia, so lack of tolerance (on paper) shouldn't be an issue for me.

Of all sad words of tongue and pen,
the saddest are these: gay frogposter

>>8838236
p. much

I wanted to help anon out but as a frogposting poltard he doesn't really deserve the help

>>8836748
tbqhon, /pol/ is probably part of why you feel so self-hating and think people must be judging you for being gay, despite being in a progressive country. You honestly might feel better if you stop browsing there, being in a bubble where people are (either seriously or for feigned edge) shitposting about how faggots should all die and homosexuality is a Jewish conspiracy probably isn't good for your health.

You're not unusually perverted, although you clearly are mentally ill. You should pursue treatment from your depression and anxiety and watch out that "overtraining" + low self esteem doesn't spiral into excessive exercise or another eating disorder-type problem.

You might be gay and repressing it, or you might be some kind of bi.

Tip for Grindr, try actual dating and don't put out for the first 2-3 dates. Most of the fuckboys who are pretending to like you so they can get sum fucc will get bored after one. Also I have no idea how it is in Sweden, but in my part of the UK gay guys have a saying that Grindr is for hookups and Tinder is for actual relationships, so maybe try another app.

>>8838236
>>8838258

My power levels aren't that high. I just love the memes and chaos. I've made an effort to stoop going there and to /r9k/ since these boards literally give you mental illnesses and make you even more unhinged than you were before you went there. Also, I just lurk there, I'm not really politically active, it's just that the memes took me under, kinda like that song (https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Ul2vtD4dPt4 ).

Why so mean to a fellow human bane? I'f I don't sort out my problems soon and fix my fucked up brain... I'm scared to think of what kind of hellish existience I'll be in a couple of years from now, and I feel like I've created a earthly hell form myself as we speak. I'm addicted to sleeping pills, the gym and have so much anxiety that I can't really enjoy much unless I'm drinking.

>>8838323
It's sad because you're so self hating for being gay (or possibly bi? IDK) due to the nonsense and paranoia you've been exposed to. I dunno why you expect an lgbt site to tell you're you're a mentally ill pervert for wanting to have gay sex, though, that seems like a stretch.

I'm sure you've internalized all the bigotry those kinds of places shove down your throat, but try to realize it's not like that. That said, grindr is perhaps not the best option if you're looking for more than a hookup. There ARE plenty of gay guys who are interested in stable relationships, I'm not sure where to look though (I'm a tranny, not a gay guy). Try asking gaygen about it, maybe? Just avoid /polgbt/ posters, they'll try to convince you that self-hatred is a GOOD thing because blah blah blah.

>>8838323
Like you said, I think the thing is with /pol/ and /r9k/ that it's all fun and games for a while because you think you can spot the obvious bullshit and take in all the ridiculous conspiracy-tier stuff, but after a while the less obvious stuff starts to have an insidious effect on you - you can't distinguish real vs fake news for every plausible-sounding thing you see, and after a while it starts to affect your worldview. I've seen it happen with friends browsing there - even for the ones whose political beliefs were (ostensibly) unchanged who were just there for the banter, they'd sometimes mention stats or bits of news offhand that had obviously come verbatim from those boards, and be shocked to find out they weren't true. That's besides the obvious stuff like them just deadening you to outright hostility that would shock normies, to the point where you expect it as normal and think lots of people must think that way (like how this board has got me used to people hating biscum, when IRL most people will never state that openly).

Try to find some happier gay content to watch. Something other than porn or self-loathing, watch some TV or read some shitty fluffy manga or go out and play football or something. I've been in that self-loathing hole before and the more you feed it, the more fucked-up your fantasies are going to get and the worse and more perverted you'll end up feeling. It happened to me with gay BDSM, it happens to a ton of trans repressors with them ending up getting into extreme shit like sissy hypno rape.

>>8838592
Right now, since school started again I've been feeling really anxious. I've spent all day now playing bf1 and listening political youtube videos (which make be making me even more intense). I just feel so shitty and I'll probably drink tonight just because and so I wont be feeling this dread/anxiety.

>>8841309
Again, why would you do that to yourself? Find a healthier outlet.

Í'm so drunk and I can't get weed, any tips on how to get weed on grindr?

>>8843185
don't. I tried once and got scammed out of 50 bucks by a couple of niggers