can we have a self hatred thread? For gays only, trannies can

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>>8794643
You will never be a bishit that knows the feeling of breaking gay boys hearts for roasties.

>>8794643
>you will never be anything more than "the gay friend" to any of your friends
this one is by far the worst.

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>>8794643
>you will never fully understand the subtleties of hetero romance stories
>you will never have kids without adoption or surrogacy being involved

>>8794643
>you will never be anything more than "the gay friend" to any of your friends

Jokes on you, I don't have any friends.

>>8794643
>>8794718
You don't have to be gay. Despite all the propaganda, you are not born gay. You have the free will to not act on temptation and can decide not to look with lust at other men.
Gay people have turned straight before. I'm not saying it's easy, but it's possible.

>>8794643
tbqhon I am posting here anyway

>>8794765
teach me sempai

>>8794765
I've literally never been attracted to a woman. Pussy disgusts me, and if I stop being gay I'm looking at a life of celibacy. No thanks.

>>8794765
I'm sure all this research is wrong and you are right:

Genetic Evidence of Homosexuality:

http://www.washingtonpost.com/posteverything/wp/2014/06/04/the-science-of-sexuality-how-our-genes-make-us-gay-or-straight/

http://archive.is/y64OH

https://www.advocate.com/health/2015/10/09/study-dna-identical-twins-can-reveal-whos-gay

http://archive.is/GuptB

http://www.nytimes.com/1991/12/17/science/gay-men-in-twin-study.html

http://archive.is/PSmzQ

https://www.christiantoday.com/article/research.points.to.genetic.element.in.homosexuality/35856.htm

Straight males carry gay genes:

http://chaladze.com/files/publications/Chaladze2016ASB.pdf

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Xq28

Fecundity increases in female relatives of male homosexuals:

http://journals.plos.org/plosone/article?id=10.1371/journal.pone.0051088

https://www.livescience.com/2623-gays-dont-extinct.html

http://archive.is/32sQz

Scientists find DNA differences between gay men and their straight twin brothers:

http://archive.is/g3lal

http://www.nature.com/news/epigenetic-tags-linked-to-homosexuality-in-men-1.18530

http://www.tim-taylor.com/papers/twin_studies/studies.html

https://www.scientificamerican.com/article/identical-twins-genes-are-not-identical/

http://archive.is/MALR3

http://www.hawaii.edu/PCSS/biblio/articles/1961to1999/1993-homosexual-orientation-in-twins.html

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Xq28

Female relatives of gay men have 1.3x as many children:

http://onlinelibrary.wiley.com/doi/10.1111/j.1743-6109.2012.02785.x/abstract

Androgen receptor gene linked to XQ28

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/MAGEA11

http://www.sciencemag.org/news/2014/11/study-gay-brothers-may-confirm-x-chromosome-link-homosexuality

http://archive.is/E3my1

>>8794792
Imagine a couple. They are happily married, love each other and maybe have children.
One day the father of the family goes to work. He notices that there is a new secretary. She's young and attractive.
Question: Would it be a good thing for the married man to look at the secretary with lust and embrace all the thoughts he wants to have about her? Obviously not.
And this indicates a choice. Just as the man can choose not to look at the woman with lust, a gay person can choose not to look at other man with lust.

>>8794796
Good point.
You don't have to be celibate. Women might disgust you now, but it can change. It's a slow process with many in between stages. I myself went to the process of escaping sexual immorality as well. Homosexuality is a fetish like any other fetish. Sure, it might be further away from the natural way than say, a foot fetish, but in the end it's the same foundation.

>>8794816
The evidence only suggests that there are genes that increase the likelihood of becoming a homosexual. There is no such thing as a definite "gay gene". Otherwise identical twins would always be both gay, which is far from true.

>>8794822
I mean how do I change

>>8794837
DUDE JUST DON'T BE GAY LMAO

>>8794837
(Disclaimer: There is probably more than one way and I can only speak from personal experience.)
The first step is to do what I described in my first paragraph. Stop looking at other men with lust. Don't fall into the trap of thinking "Just looking is fine, as long as I don't touch". This is more than just NoFap. Try not to get into situations where you might be tempted and if you do try to focus your mind on something else.
Eventually your sexual drive will increase. Make yourself rules on how to release this drive. One rule might be "only thinking about women". Some people prefer some steps in between, like "only traps", "only masculine looking women" etc.
Don't expect to be changed overnight. It might be difficult at first, but it gets better later on.

If you have any questions feel free to ask.

>>8794670
Naw, I'm the weird Ayn Rand liking, objectivist, ascetic, separatist friend. Not sure if better than being the gay friend

>>8794822
>Otherwise identical twins would always be both gay, which is far from true.

They are always both gay. Just because one may be in denial doesn't make it not true.

>>8794822
We don't know exactly what combination of genes causes it but that is still plenty of evidence that it is not a choice.

>>8794670
It's only true if there's absolutely nothing else to your personality other than being gay, you faggot.

>>8794900
No, it's always true. You're just deluding yourself if you think you aren't

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>>8794897
That's probably true as well. This information has been gained from self-reported data, not arousal patterns. Still 40-100% concordance is very significant.

>>8794822
OK gr8, but how do you get attracted to the idea of sex with women. My problem is that I'm OK with it, but would much rather fuck men. If I had a steady committed relationship, how do you get sexual value out of a woman then?

We should go back to tribalistic sexual behavior.

>>8794765
I know you're just shitposting, but somewhere in you lies the ability to fathom that other people have their own unalienable sense of self. Sense of self is not a temptation. It's why, as much as I'll never truly understand trannies and tranny-related things as a cis gay, I don't question their identity.

>Gay people have turned straight before.

Those people were NOT fully gay to begin with, familam. And even if people somehow do change their sexuality, that's irrelevant because no one has control over theirs either way.

>>8794905
Please. Don't project your insecurity on me just because you're a blatant, flaming homo who straight people keep around to feel progressive. My straight friends were my friends well before they knew I was gay - most people know me for months before they find out because I don't bring it up every five goddamned seconds.

>>8794885
I haven't been aroused by anything IRL in years

>>8794910
I explained the process in >>8794885
Your brain will be desperate for sexual release and if you only allow certain thoughts into your mind it will gradually adapt.

>>8794837
You don't. Ignore this fool and even other gays who tell you how to be gay or who you are. Enjoy the rest of your very limited time on this planet.

>>8794923
I'm not out to anyone. This is because everything will change once you come out. If you're out, they don't respect you

>>8794922
There are countless people who were gay (not bi) who had no attraction for the other sex at first, but turned straight later on. How do you explain this? Why would they have lied about not being bi?

>>8794932
>I'm not out to anyone.
Then you have absolutely no room for an opinion as you clearly have no clue what you're talking about. Now scurry back to that lonely closet of yours, faggot.

>>8794949
>implying I can't observe things

>>8794960
That's not the implication. The implication is that you're drawing faulty conclusions from your observations because you're biased, frightened, and stupid.

>>8794984
Yep. That's what you get for living in a shit area with ignorant religious people.

>>8794980
These aren't my original conclusions, ask any gay who's even mildly self-aware and you'll naturally realize I'm right

>>8794643
>Spend first 24 years of life living out a bitch-ass fantasy version of myself for ignorant people surrounded by and think they know what's best

>Burst out of closet and not sure how the fuck real dating works
>Handsome-ish but don't clique well with gay scene
>Closest sibling disowns, rest of family living with fingers in ears
>No normal older gay role models or couples to go to for advice while growing up...either dead, don't live within 1k miles or lifelong closeted
>1st relationship ends bc distance, current bf riddled with anxiety and suddenly can't lead normal social life
>Tfw I love people and NEED normal social life
>But love him dearly
>Tfw small town in TN and longtime friends supportive but, "Oh look, it's Anon. How's your love life, anon? Yeah so sorry we haven't kicked it in forever. Well, see you around!"
>Tfw four siblings crowd social media with DAILY photos, updates and sickly sweet posts about how proud they are to be living life with their SO
>Dozens of replies from stupid church friends about how cute they are, how can they help, y'all should come over or go to x/y/z with us
>Tfw I do anything close to that and family gets mega uncomfortable for "flaunting" it
>Tfw nevermind I fucking hate people, still hustling to win at life but I'll prob turn into quintessential bitter gayboy meme anyway
>Tfw OP you're right

>>8794990
>he hasn't come around to God yet

>>8794991
Again, you have no clue what you're talking about because you spend your life locked in the closet listening to other autistic faggot shut ins on 4chan. Maybe stop being a coward, live your life for a few years with some self respect, stop being a teenager, and get back to me. We'll see what you "know" then.

>>8795008
>live your life for a few years with some self respect
What about myself would I respect? I'm an utter mediocrity in all fields. You probably don't belong on this website.

>>8794990
Yeah but no. That's what I GET for being dragged down here at sixteen. You try living somewhere the minimum wage is "ain't supposed to be a livin' wage you commie" and bust your ass to finish college with 0 help then see how easy it is to relocate to a normal place where normal people live

>>8795015
Well... you finished college, so... leave?

>>8794943
Idk. Go ask them yourself bc I'm not one of them

>>8794643

>you will never be anything more than 'the gay friend' to any of your friends

just dont come out of the closet. at the very least wait a couple months. they treat you like an actual man its pretty cool. when you come out they already have your role in their life so you don't get stuck as just the gay friend.

>>8795043
I never plan on coming out, and I don't have friends anyway

>>8795046

then whats your problem? my post was to respond specifically to OPs issue. if you dont have OPs issue you dont need that advice, so kinda a moot point to respond to it.

>>8795031
I will, I will. I just can't right now because I'm in the middle of a ltr, saving up money to afford upcoming school loan repayments and have yet to land a good career bc I just graduated. Setting up a site soon and already have a stellar resume and whatnot. I'm just being a bitter fuck about it until I can leave Trumpistan.
To be totally honest I just don't know if that future can even include current bf

>>8795051
I'm OP

>>8795057

then stop whining about issues you claim not to have,.

>>8795060
Because it's another reason to hate yourself and it makes me not want to try to make any friends

>>8795066

sounds like you got a case of the dumb

>>8795070
how so?

>>8795077

>BEING GAY SUCKS FOR REASONS I CANT ACTUALLY CONFIRM

lol

>>8795086
one can suppose

>>8794928
This is probably the best sentiment here. Being celibate or denying who you are so others will approve of you is no way to live.

Of course you can be responsible and if you want to wait till marriage or something for sex or only in the context of monogamy that's fine. But to let others control your sex life when you have such limited time seems foolish.

>>8795119
>denying who you are
Your sexuality does not define you as a person. There is no "gay identity".
Also, changing yourself =/= denying yourself. Big difference.

>so others will approve of you
You don't do it for others, you do it for yourself. Have you looked at the topic of this thread? There are people who are unhappy with their situation and I'm simply offering a way out.

>>8795346
It literally defines you. Not all of you, but it is an integral part of you and denying it because others try to cajole you into it serves no useful purpose and will only make you unhappy.

You are not offering a way out. You are offering a path to misery and suicide where acceptance of being gay, as well as others tolerating you being gay is proven to improve health and happiness. You have empty promises that you cannot fulfill and offer nothing to people here but self-hatred and doubt. You are a plague.

>>8795346
>There are people who are unhappy with their situation and I'm simply offering a way out.

As much as people are responsible for their own outcomes, at least part of that unhappiness stems from people like you who seem wholly incapable of grasping what it means to be an individual or how to mind your own business to the extent that you aren't funneling self-evident poison down their throats. That's not the way to fulfillment. Let's hope you keep it contained online.


I'll let you in on a little secret. You aren't offensive or oppressive to me, because I've learned to adapt and live alongside well meaning people with your type of circular logic and respect it as only that. It's the impressionable, vulnerable teenagers being raised with those ideas who I'm worried about.
Sexuality may not "define" someone in the way you mean, but it certainly sets the parameters of your deepest connection with someone. So glad your infatuation with pussy is just that and you apparently chose to wade in it for life.

>>8794765
welp, it's still a choice for me...

>>8794900
It's even true if you have an interesting personality.
You see your personality does not matter.
What matters are superficial things people can use to gossip about you.

You're the fat guy, the short guy, the gay guy, the poser with straight A's. You're the guy who gets detention every 2 days, they guy who can't shut his mouth, the guy who peed his pants on the school trip.

People, even friends, know you by the things that stand out.
Your personality, unless outright bizarre or exceptionally boring, isn't one of them.

You might not introduce yourself as "the gay guy", but you don't need to as your friends undoubtedly have already done so for you.

>>8794905

>recently had a straight friend ask me 'are you gay? I can't remember'

stop being a faggot and maybe people will stop treating you like a faggot

>>8794643
self-loathing is, after all considerations, a waste of time more than anything else

>>8797245
I'm not out to anyone you retard. You're just too obtuse to realize what everyone else knows is obvious

>>8794895
No, you're still the gay friend, regardless of whatever else you like, just like black people are black friends and women are peopleIcanpotentiallyfuck friends.

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>Be convinced you're straight until 30 years old
>Eventually it hits you like a ton of bricks
>You're not even the cool kind of gay like pic related
>You're just a thin noodly armed bottom

Man always get dealt a shit hand even in being a homo. I keep being afraid I'll end up like these camp fairy dudes and I never behaved that way and I would hate to.

Fuck I was even okay with being alone and then this drops. I know parents would accept me but dad is 70 and he's happy with his life, still working as an high up engineer, he's okay with me being alone but I know inside it would break him. I'm their most loved kid. I don't want to fuck up the autumn of their life cause I know they will never forsake me but will keep blaming themselves.

Someone here mentioned Oliver Sacks once and I read up about him and the dude was so fucking inspiring though a top obviously. If I have to be gay I want to be like him.

>>8797813
Coming out is a meme and unnecessary unless you have a bf. I know some couples with guys who are married and their parents still don't know.

>>8797825

I dont want to do it because it would deny my life up to this point.

I have a best friend, this dude I knew since I was 8 years old. We still go out for beers almost every week. He only got laid at 28 but has a hot gf now they are happy and getting married next year.

Used to be people suspected us of being gay but we'd laugh it the fuck off and I never felt anything for him, most of my life I never even thought of doing anything with a dude sexually. Never experimented or stuff either. No reason to.

Suppose I tell people I'm gay and he gets insantly suspected too when he fucking isn't and nobody will believe we spent so much time together and never did anything.

Or this another guy whos bi and would instantly hit on me and I dont want to. I just dont want to deal with all that shit. I finally have a good job, financially independent and considering going back to university I want to keep all this shit under wraps.

I am also scared to even drink with people anymore. I used to go hard at it and not remember the next day and laugh about it and now I'm scared I'd do some gay stuff.

The whole thing doesn't tear me apart but its such a fucking bother to deal with.