somebody please kill me

I like making these threads too op

*kyses you*

>>8763885
Me too me too

>>8763866
I can feel you anon..

>>8763866
>>8764569
what's wrong?

>>8763866
I'd rather save you. Don't give up, OP. You can still turn things around.

>>8763866
Trust me. As someone who has died before, you don't want to die.

>>8764574
Russia is wrong.

>>8764580
little bit discomfort before eternal peace is much better than decades of suffering

>>8764585
Move!

>>8764591
Easy to say.

>>8764594
Right. Doing is harder, and I wish it wasn't, but at least you have a clear attainable goal.

>>8763866
hey I feel the same rn <3
what's your reason?

>>8764649
6'7. why couldn't i be 5'7

>>8764590
Death is not eternal peace. Far from it.

>>8764669
It is, people who have suicided and came back said there isn't anything on the other side, just blackness

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>>8764653
I understand...
when I get those thoughts I try to distract myself with sleeping or games or alcohol

>>8764653
yeesh

The best reason I can give you for not killing yourself is that euthanasia is really hard to acquire and everything else will fuck you up horrifically in the likely event it doesn't work.

Also family/friends I guess.

Otherwise I probably would too at that height.

>>8763866
Suicide is hard to do

>>8764785
For reference, blowing your head of with a shotgun is only 99% effective. This seems like a lot, but the odds of you being born at that as a normal cis male, let alone a trans girl, is less than 1%. The odds of you being trans are even lower, .3%

The combined odds are about 1 in 33,333.

I wouldn't trust your luck if I were you, best not risk it.

>>8764793
*at that height

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>>8763866
I want this dysphoria to end. But im too afraid to end it all nor keep it going. Im just a loser. Im extremly jealous of passable trans girls and cis girls.

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>>8764787
>>8763866

Suicide is pretty easy. Just have to want it badly enough. Look through at little BestGore.com and check out the suicide section - helps to get a grasp on how easy it is and what you need to do.

Take a large dose of heroin.

You fall asleep in a comfy cocoon with no pain and never wake up

>>8765108
pain is scary

>>8765060
>>8765060
Normally I encourage people to transition, but for you I'll share the secret to repression.

First, isolate yourself from women. Work in a male dominated field, fall out of contact with your female friends if they aren't in your innermost circle, and minimize interaction or attention to them generally.

Hang out with your male friends as often as you can reasonably accommodate. Prioritize friends who don't engage in stereotypically masculine activities, and avoid forcing yourself into them when both unnecessary and unwanted, but attempt to engage in the ones you enjoy.

Second, stop giving a shit about your appearance at all. Do not give a second of though to your clothing, just wear what you tend to wear and ignore any impulse to reconsider once you made a first pick.

Minimize the time spent shaving by getting electric hair razors and shear it off. Maintain a light stubble, and don't, for the love of fucking christ, ever touch it. Or lay on it. Or brush against it. Just keep your face away from shit.

Get a crew cut, something around 2 inches long, 4 is when you cut it again. Don't pay attention to your hair, just get a low maintenance haircut. Remember, the goal with all this is to minimize the thought you put into anything related to your appearance.

Speaking of which, learn to disassociate your image in the mirror from your actual self. Just get the basic idea of what you /need/ from it to do /necessary/ hygeine and blot out any self-recognition.

(Continued)

>>8765155
Third, the most important thing, find deeply technical or absorbing interests, and just throw yourself at them. Lose yourself in the long-term obsession with the minutiae of whatever it is you can maintain interest in. It has to be something that doesn't allow time for thought, you need to be thinking about it and absorbed by it. It has to rattle around your brain while you stop doing it. That might seem like a lot to ask, but you don't have to focus on the big picture. If you like something like some sort of consumer electronic, then pore over the details of specific devices. If you like science, watch documentaries and read articles.

If you are forced into situations where your mind is not occupied, or is less than fully engaged, either listen to music and focus on that, or become hyper-aware of your surroundings in such a way as to take your focus from the dark recesses of your mind.

Fourth, this will all fail periodically of course, and when it does you will need coping mechanisms. Eating is a very effective one. Sleeping is extremely effective, but can easily conflict with schedules. Running or similar forms of cardio are effective when your health suffers from poor diet or sleep, but you'll probably need music too. Self-harming can help if you do it right. I don't advise cutting, instead get a metal comb and heat it in front of a space heater and press against your skin for a second or so. It's a good amount of pain and very little damage to your skin.

And lastly, have people to talk with you, whenever possible. Someone who mostly listens, rarely judges, and understands your situation. If you feel like you can't deal with something, talk to them.

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>>8764653
>6'7

AHAHAHAHAHA WHAT A FREAK!

>pic related is you

>>8765158
Also, P.S., Get the fuck off of 4chan.

Now.

/Especially/ this board.

>>8765155
I thought about cutting my hair but I feel like I would die inside if I have a shot hair. Finding something that I can immerse into is difficult because I just can't concentrate on anything because of anxiety. I get panic attacks and I just can't make myself productive. It seems that I am just not motivated to do anything in life. I will probably need to take anti anxiety meds first before trying anything. My sleeping schedule is weird. I usually sleep 3 hours at night and take a nap during the day. I can't sleep for a long time. I think cardio might helpful.
P.S. I don't have any friend. 4chan is the only place I can talk about things.

>>8764653
>>8764653
>Tfw I know a girl who is trans and is about 6'7 and she passes

She's notoriously tall. As much as people meme, if you pass it's just a 'WHOA SHE'S TALL' kind of issue. I used to think passing over 6'2 was impossible until I met her.

Oh but you're definitely screwed if you live in a manlet land like south-east Asia

>>8765247
A medium haircut would work as a compromise, then. The main thing is you need to not be feeling your hair brushing on your skin or getting in your field of view.

http://hairtrend.ru/wp-content/uploads/2010/09/Jean-Louis-David_Urban-Energy_fw-2010-2011_07.jpg

Something like that might work, even easier if you have curly hair.

Unfortunately anxiety in trans people is usual because the hormones in your brain are wrong, estrogen usually fixes or at least mitigates that. You can try anxiety meds though, risperdal worked for me for a while but it made my prolactin skyrocked so I had to stop taking it.

You need to get into a regular sleep cycle. Find something to do at specific parts of the day at least eight hours apart, spread out around midday.

You don't have /any/ friends? You need at least one person to hang out with IRL, everyone does to be a functional person. Try to get back in contact with old friends, and maybe join a discord or something in the meantime.

>>8765363
>Unfortunately anxiety in trans people is usual because the hormones in your brain are wrong

The pseudoscience around here is strong

>>8765367
>The effect of cross-sex hormonal treatment on gender dysphoria individuals’ mental health: a systematic review
https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC4977075/
>"All these three investigations (two cross-sectional studies and one longitudinal one) have consistently reported a reduction in symptoms of anxiety among individuals receiving hormone therapy"

>A Systematic Review of the Effects of Hormone Therapy on Psychological Functioning and Quality of Life in Transgender Individuals
http://online.liebertpub.com/doi/full/10.1089/trgh.2015.0008
>The SCL-90 anxiety subscales showed higher than normal anxiety for participants in both studies at baseline (mean=1.05, SD=0.94; normal <1.0;12 mean=17.0, SD=6.4; general population mean=12.8, SD=4.4).14 At follow-up, both studies saw a statistically significant reduction in anxiety with scores in the normal range at 3–6-month follow-up (mean=12.4, SD=5.1)14 and 12-month follow-up (mean=0.54, SD=0.56),12 as well as significant standardized mean change scores (−0.66 [95% CI: −0.93, −0.38];12 −0.78 [95% CI: −1.18, −0.38]14).

You were saying?

>>8765178
but then I wont
>have people to talk with you, whenever possible. Someone who mostly listens, rarely judges, and understands your situation

>>8765418
You should probably join one of the discords then, because the people here will judge you, harshly, and that is probably worse for your mental health than if you weren't here imo.

But hey, if it actually helps go for it.

>>8765363
>A medium haircut would work as a compromise, then.
yeah I think thats probably what I should do
>anxiety issues
I am also quiting hrt. I hope I dont get more panic attacks from this.
I feel lonely but I also don't want to meet people. I am too ashemed of myself.

>>8765471
You'd already started hormones? What medications and doses? Did you see a doctor or self-med? And most importantly, did you notice an initial change in your anxiety levels when you started them, and was the change positive or negative?

If you can't interact with people IRL, and you don't want to expand from 4chan, then you should really see a therapist at least, and talk to them about also seeing a psychiatrist for your anxiety.

Do you have a job? Health insurance?

>>8764730
Blackness is something that can only be experienced by a conscious mind. It's not blackness, but nothingness. An eternity of nothingness.

>>8765177
>I unironically love Tabitha

tfw want to die but also really want to play pokemon and super nintendo

>>8765493
>What medications and doses?
I am on 50mg cypro and 5 mg E prescrived from doctor.
I did notice my anxiety level went down initially when I first took E but it doent help when im still dysphoric.
>If you can't interact with people IRL, and you don't want to expand from 4chan, then you should really see a therapist at least, and talk to them about also seeing a psychiatrist for your anxiety.
I will meet a psychiatrist for anti anxiety meds.
>Do you have a job? Health insurance?
no and no. i still go to college.