I’m 27, virgin. Sexually abused when younger. Failed at sexual

cool story bra

>>8752924

Have a sex holiday in Thailand for a couple of weeks and hook up with all the girl/boy/??? people you want.

Lose your nerves and then start dating for real.

>>8752945
I’ve been on holidays alone before but never been able to make it happen.

One time when I was 22 this beautiful Swiss guy my age asked me to go for a drink with him in the evening and I said yes but was too scared to show up. I’ll regret things like that forever.

I was also sexually abused as a kid, and I felt exactly the same way as a 27-year-old virgin: completely left behind and probably destined to die alone.

I wish I could tell you something hopeful, but I'm turning 33 soon and it's about the same, so I can't. But you're not alone.

idk about you, but I'm personally not very lonely. I kind of like just being by myself. I do wish I could experience a relationship/sex. I feel like I'd try harder to put myself out there, but I also feel that anyone who realized that I've basically never dated is going to think there's something so wrong with me that they'd be put off. I don't want to lie, though.

>>8752981
I spend every weekend and evening alone in bed. Not sure if I feel lonely on not, this has been my life since 18.

I do occasionally (like once every 6 months), 8 get aggressive bursts of anger at my situation.

I’m sad it’s not changed for you.

The "put yourself out there" line is no joke.
I pretty much see myself as a bridge troll, but when I started working on improving myself the best I could (gym, eating healthy, quitting vices), and made a few profiles on some homoapps and just tried to make friends, I was surprised that guys actually started pursuing me. Had a few friends with benefits, and then inexplicably found myself with my first boyfriend.
It wasn't all great like some disney cartoon romance, but now I have more experience and WAAAAY more confidence in myself. I look back at how I used to be and I don't even understand what was holding that guy back for so long.

>>8753012
What sparked that change?

What was your daily routine before and after?

>>8752924
Not sure if it helps you, but here is my experience briefly
Iv been a loner neet living with parents and then got a job to live alone when I was already 24-25 and had poor socialization.

I made friends at work and hanged out with
them (I guess that was pure luck to meet some nice people at workplace)
And I looked for local online communities for people with common interests - like music, gaming, gamedesign - and after getting to know people online we were glad to meed and hang out irl too, Ive made some friends and got to know some cool gay folks too without actually looking for any relationships. I have to say I cant stand hookups so I never used dating or clubs or any shit like that. I simply tried to be more social and meet more interesting people with common cultural background and interests and be more open.

>>8753038
I was depressed and lazy and besides work all I would do was sit around for hours smoking pot watching tv eating garbage and going out drinking with coworkers every night (not actually socializing, just getting black out drunk).

What sparked the change was half my face going dead and me freaking out thinking I'd had a stroke thanks to my shitty life choices.
Turns out it was actually Bell's Palsy, and a doctor gave me some antibiotics that cleared it up (thank fuck), but it scared the hell out of me and I decided it was time to get my shit together.
After that I joined a gym and ate healthier and stopped drinking and just tried to do better and put myself out there, and that was enough to get me relationships.
Problem was that I was still inexperienced and being healthy in body doesn't magically make you confident or less naive. You have to actually do the whole pain-in-the-ass "life" thing in order to grow as a human.

So life has had a few bumps in the road since then, but I learned from them, and now I'm a healthy weight, I exercise regularly, I don't drink or do any drugs, I'm going back to school so I can get a better job, AND I'm confident in myself and happy.
I'm not on any apps/putting myself out there at the moment because I really want to focus on improving myself more than I managed to last time.

>>8752924
you should hang out w people and start social network from work

at least you know they are better then some cock slut off the street or craiglist

most people don't get married until their 30s so you still have time

nice thing about being a virgin is you don't have any std's to spread or infect someone else

>>8755890
What country do you live in?

>>8756579
UK - London

>>8753093
But how do I do the life thing? I feel like I would do it if I knew how. I’ve sat watching for years.

>>8757139
get outside for starters
and don't be a slob, be presentable and friendly

time goes by faster then you can imagine

t. lonely wizard

>>8757149
I know time goes by fast. I’m so scared at how I’m 27.5...

I’m very presentable, have nice clothes, tailored suits etc.

Do I just wonder around outside?

>>8757149
>get outside for starters
>and don't be a slob, be presentable and friendly
doesnt help

t. socializing wizard

>>8757174
never over dress, when in doubt error on side of casual

don't you have to ever shop for food, supplies, go to to the bank, exercise, etc?

you never know where you might meet someone

i was standing in line to pay, and a really nice guy looked over my shoulder and started a conversation about what I was searching on my phone...

>>8757198
i'll admit connections rarely happen for me, and I failed so far at the few that I've had. for example, i blew it with the guy above

>>8757115

The average age of marriage in The USA is 28 vs The UK's 32.

His situation looks worse in comparison if he is in The USA.

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119KB, 402x604px

>>8757228
>never over dress
I would argue the opposite.
If you dress up then you attract attention and people think you are going somewhere nice or that you have high self-esteem.
Everyone dresses down these days and it looks like they don't care or they can't afford to look good.
But then I don't mind standing out and being noticed.
If you are shy or insecure then maybe dressing to disappear is what you should do.

pic not related, i just thought it was funny and cute

>>8757320
My clothes are the only thing I like. I have beautifully tailored business suits. Tbh I don’t need casual clothes (although do have some) as I don’t do anything non-work related.

>>8752924
where do you live OP?

>>8757524
London

>>8757537
are you planning to move to a non-islamic country out of fear for your life yet?

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1MB, 283x198px

>>8752924

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=iaGnvEWqM7A

>>8752924

Now it's your turn to abuse someone.
Only way to rescue you.

>>8752924
Hello dear, where are you located? If you don't mind me asking :)

I can be a great healer <3

>>8752924
Reading this you should alot like me. I was sexually abused for year as a child. Grew up Bi sexual and diagnosed with a bunch of mental issues ptsd depression and the big one is split personality disorder. In one mind set I shun sex, Hate being touched and feel horrible with any body contact. The other personality is a total whore. Sounds fake and odd sadly its nether.. This became a way to protect my mind from the reputed sexual abuse, My mind had to adapt or totally fucking loose it so it became two people.. I would dive deeper in to this but its not about me its about you.. I recommend going to a phycoligest aka shrink they work fucking wonders.. For years I tendered on self destruction from drinking and drugs and sex plus my ptsd was causing me to become violent to the point I was a danger to everyone.. My friend got me to see her shrink and ever since the road had become less scary and more better.. I know its not what you wanna hear but seriously go to a shrink, They have programs that will help with the money if you can't afford the hourly rate like me and it really works.. Years ago I would have told anyone who sad see one to fuck off but when you hit rock bottom there ant no way out other then that or death I decided to take a chance and it was beyond helpful... Please go see one they can totally help you.. hope this finds ya well and best wishes

Join dating apps and just chat, it's a good start even when you're inexperienced