I don't fit in

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I'm a born male. I've o lay been in hetero relationships. I've had a three year relationship. They were fun. But I occasionally didn't feel masculine enough.

Yet, I am not romantically into men. I lust for cock at times, I crave the domination at times, but I am not romantically interested and the male face doesn't do much for me.

I have a male competitiveness that stops me from giving in and being with a man,

Right now I wish an undeniable, dominant yet nurturing force would break in and take me in a way in Which I can't control. So I wouldn't have a choice and couldn't run into any hang ups.

I feel like there are two personalities in me. One likes submission and pleasing. It doesn't like my birth name. I want to name it sometimes a feminine name. It seems sexual in nature. It's always thirsty and hungry.

When I indulge it, I can feel it get stronger and he other get weaker.

It would like to be slapped, spanked, disciplined, fucked hard, bred, dominated, etc.


I don't know what to do. I don't fit in with anyone. My old male friends were loud. I just wanted deep, quiet conversations.

I don't fit in gay we'll win my gay friends.

I want to have sex with my female friends,me hike also opening up to them about this.


What am I? What do I do? Any advice?