Anyone else /dontknowwhothefucktheyare/ here? For the entirety

>>8619244
OP here. Strictly into men is actually kind of a lie, I had girl crushes as a kid but my interested generally faded after age 14 and it was all men all the time after that.

I also suffered pretty bad dysphoria during my teen years. So a few years ago I started taking hormones. But now seeing how I feminine i've become compared to how I looked pre hormones, I'm sort of comfortable with being a guy now? IDK if that will change in a few years, but at the moment i'm content with being a very effeminate girlyboy.

>>8619244
All of this stuff about not having to have dysphoria to transition is just confusing me more. It would be nice to be a girl, but at what cost do I go about changing my gender? And if I get fucked up will I just be doomed for the rest of my life? What do I do about wanting to become a high school teacher? Do I even really want this in the first place?
All these questions are eating me up on the inside and I don't want that going to college this fall. RIP

Very common for ftms to grow out of it, more often than not it's not actually deep rooted body dysphoria from a mistmatched brain but rather dislike of female gender roles or preference for male gender roles and expression.

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249KB, 597x599px

>>8619244
Yeau, for the entirety of my teens, I was confused about whether of not I was a fucking leaf.

But by now, I've amassed some serious enlightenment and realized just how fucktarded the whole idea that I could be a leaf is.

But, on top of all this, in between those times, I've had the probably fucktarded queer confusion, somehow, it's really fucking bizarre how that actually could have happened. It's all so confusing, like looking at all these people connected to this, wondering how they manage to exist and are allowed to exist, especially the biggest champions of such shit, I wonder why they won't just fucking go away...

>>8619244
typical female AUTISM
at least you are not a tmblr sjw

>>8619244
Physical dysphoria? Like, you hated your breasts and felt like they were alien growths? You had phantom erections? You hated your junk? Felt sick using the toilet or bathing? Freaked out or had a panic attack if someone tried to touch you there (like a bf or doc)?

Or social dysphoria, like you really hated being treated like a girl?

Very curious to know which kind you may have grown out of.

>>8619244
Are you genuinely happy with yourself right now? For how long have you been feeling better?

>>8619791
Actual physical dysphoria. Straight on dick envy. The thought of growing old as a female made me feel sick to my stomach.

>>8619809
I don't know if genuinely happy is the right term. I guess what I feel is a sense of semi-peace. I can accept who I am, and I do not have a penis. I guess it's been happening since I tried taking better care of myself, which was a few months ago.

>>8622666
Interesting. It's really late and I'm really tired atm so I don't want to dispense dumb potentially life-ruining advice but tl;dr it could be that you somehow really outgrew everything but it could also be that you're feeling better because you got your shit together. I don't know if it's the same for FTMs but for MTFs it's a cliche to try to man up, take care of yourself, go into some ultra masculine profession, feel better for a while and then break down. Dysphoria seems to be cyclical for a lot of people, with them feeling fine for a while in-between bouts of depression or vice versa. Buuut keep in mind that it could be that you just Got Better because apparently a lot of people desist? Try seeing how you feel over time. Allow yourself to "try out" different modes of thought and expression and see how you feel.

I'm sorry if that wasn't very helpful. Good luck.