Advice from anon weebs sounds like a good idea

bump bc desperate

>>8601626
Honestly, it might be hard to find someone who's not going to push too hard without online dating. I'd honestly go towards that, so that you have more selection and can get to know someone over a longer period of time than having to make a spontaneous decision like when talking to someone in person.

You'll also be able to throw out some of your interests, and make it clear you're looking for a relationship rather than a hookup, and see the same of other guys. You'll likely have a wider pool of people to choose from too, depending on where you live.

Finding someone with some shared interests should cut down on awkwardness too, along with messaging/texting back and forth before deciding to give a date a shot.

Do keep in mind though, if you're going for the masc/fem thing but wanting someone sensitive enough, it might be intimidating for them to initiate anything physical for fear of coming off like a creep to someone they find attractive. When you're comfortable with at least a kiss, try to initiate before thinking they're not into you.

If he expected sex on the first date, he is probably not worth your time. You can find sex on Grindr. But if boys are pressuring you into it, I would just dump them and say, you aren't special, I can find a hookup on Grindr. There is no secret to finding a nice boy. You just have to put in a little effort but even more importantly you have to not be a loser. Work out or dress nice and all that, drop hints and ask people out.

>>8602066
The problem isn't attraction, the problem is finding guys worth some investment. Whenever I find a nice guy they always turn out to be focused on things like sex, and I don't want to be the 18 year old that says things like "Well, I want a serious relationship" because that'll make me seem so prudish even tho it's what I want.

>>8602005
Online dating as in those horrid dating apps?

And yeah, I think my main problem is that I just need to help make the other guy more comfortable, because me retreating into my shell the second something goes wrong doesn't sound very good for them...

>>8602225
Nah, like an actual dating site. I mean you could try sifting through, but tinder/grindr is hookup central.

Also finding committed 18-20 year old masculine gay guys sounds next to impossible. Even if they aren't the kind to hookup, it wouldn't be surprising at all if they'd literally never had a gay experience by that point. Wouldn't expect too much until they're at least like 25/out of college.

>>8601626
be my waifu you sound perfect

>tfw no adorably autistic prudish femboy bf

>>8601626
hmm when I was 16-18, I dont know you and can only speak of myself - Im far from accoustic but anxious af and girly and could be shaking and its pretty normal to avoid when you get that much anxiety
I couldn't stand 1nighters or aggressive partners and had bad experience with guys and girls who rush to get in your pants

I needed to find someone I could be comfy with and I could give in myself to and be more open just talking first and making smaller steps and being more playful - that really eases the tension and makes you both feel more comfortable, when you are still basically kids with little experience you need to explore and fool around for a bit and learn to understand eachother. And instead of running away scared you can let him know that you want to take it slow - again that needs someone you trust and can open up your vulnerable soul.
Again its just me but I felt better playing more a female role saying 'no, stop' meaning 'oh yes, take me'

>>8602266
Alright, at this point I'd go for someone older but not like in their 30s.
Why can't there be any serious cute boys, anon? :(

>>8602344
Yeah I see what you're saying, if the guys were a tad bit more assertive then I probably would've loved the hell out of that, but obvi they somewhat respected me and saw I was uncomfortable, idk how to explain "Look, when I look uncomfortable I'll like it" without looking like a nutter or get into some dreadful situation. Euh.

>>8602325
ok daddy, we're married now

File: [Anime-Koi] Sabagebu! - 07 [h264-720p][2CBF4D96].mkv_snapshot_18.16_[2015.02.14_12.37.57].jpg (48KB, 1280x720px) Image search: [Google]

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>>8602266
>sign up for okcupid
>message four people with an actual message related to their interests on their profile (aka not just a "hello")
>receive no response
>they don't even visit my profile
>mfw I'm uggo as fuck

>>8602597
I'm just nervous about putting myself out there. Did you stop using the site after that experience?

>>8602597
I haven't really had much luck with okcupid either. But like, I can't even find a single femboy on it period.

>>8602652
Maybe find one online and meet up? If you're old enough and can endure long distance & travel, it seems like that's the best option.

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>>8602659
Well yeah, the problem is finding someone in the first place if I can't even find them on a dating site.

>>8602434
You can be non-verbal, minor physical contact is a big deal at early stage and people read it: if you avoid being close at all or if you try to get closer and like being hugged even if you are visibly unclomfortable or say something like 'nah dont think I want to'. Sadly that's harder with guys since we are socially taught to be more reserved or be assertive and men are more impulsive in general.
One trick that helped me with anxiety is to downplay it, think it's nothing serious and dont have expectations, "we'r just gonna chill", instead of "oh god we are on date and I must have sex..." which makes you more anxious from the anticipation.

Also I gotta add I had best experience and relationship when it started more as a friendly thing before it got sexual even when meeting someone in a gay chat.

>>8602696
Aren't you in college ? at that age I hanged and partied around a lot and making friends with some fag usually ended in meeting more
Maybe try some groups/chats in your area where people meet to hang out and not exclusively for hookups

>>8602696
>Finding someone in the first place
Boy, you can find just about anyone online. This image board or even reddit is ripe. Only thing is, is how far they are.

>>8602777
Honestly, I think I just have high expectations. I think of all these cutesy scenarios and anticipate them which makes me nervous. Ugh.

And I wish something could form casually, it's just gay people are so far and thin--not to mention guys I don't click with--it seems hard and just impossible.

Maybe if I ask guys to make me their housewife on the first date things would work out? See no problems there


yeah

>>8602797
If the endgame is cuddling and watching anime together, that's not too farfetched for a first date.

>>8602848
Bet how many people like anime irl
0

>>8602629
well those were the only four people in my city and the surrounding area (<30 miles) who I was particularly interested in so after that I've not really found much of a reason to use it.

>>8602855
0 until you meet them, yes

Actually here's something more helpful. When I happen to have the urge to talk to random people on 4chan, the ones who like anime a bunch always assume I don't. Because I don't make it as obvious as they're used to.

So yeah.