>pain (physical, not psychological) feels good to me >physically

No, you're just a freak.

>>8546295
Wish I was like that desu. But yea youre a freak.

>>8546404
Why do you want to be this way?

>>8546415
Seems less boring to be fucked up like that.
Don't mind my scars and blood has a pretty color with an odd calming effect but it fucking hurts.

>>8546439
I'd give anything to not be this way. I feel like an abomination, I'm like an imitation knockoff human

>>8546459
Sounds to me like youre not doing enough drugs to accommodate this lifestyle. Jk, sucks to be u but you'll learn to deal someday.

be my gf?

>>8546591
Why do you want someone like me?

>>8547106
Self harm is kinda hot.
At least as long as it aint the bpd type.

>>8547140
I don't think I have bpd.

I don't really like self harm though, I'd much rather someone else harm me

it's alright anon, I also get off to cutting and physical abuse. It's probably a coping mechanism

>>8547227
How long have you known that you liked pain?

>>8547245
started cutting at 11, probably one of the first sexual things I did before I knew how to masturbate

>>8547216
I'll whip and spank you anon. Please be my girl! (or if you're a boy that's cool too).

Why do you not like being like this? It's a pretty cool trait, you could have a lot of fun with a partner you trust, so long as you aren't too extreme.

Ever heard of a violet wand? They can feel very painful, almost like being cut, but it doesn't leave any marks.

I feel you hard OP. For me it's more about danger. My bf actually joked that If I was mugged and someone pulled a gun to my head, that i'd get wet... I asked if he was serious and he said "well maybe you wouldn't find it sexy in the moment but you might get off to it afterwards"... I'm ashamed to admit he might be right

>>8547254
That was around the same time for me. I accidentally cut myself and it felt wonderful to me.

>>8547258
I'm mtf

I don't think you understand how strong my feelings are anon. Whipping and spanking is not nearly enough

>>8547278
>>8547279
also same, whipping and spanking is weak
into like, beating near death, twisting fingers back, breaking teeth off, forced vomitting, etc.

>>8547284
It's not that I wouldn't enjoy whipping and spanking, it's just that I'm insatiable. When I feel pain it just makes me want more

>>8547284
>Want my bf to be very rough with me, to literally beat and abuse me while fucking me
>Also don't want people seeing me bruised up or hearing me yell and assume he abuses me non-consensually.

Why must life be this way?

>>8546295
I don't think that's my sort of thing even slightly, but I'm also really intrigued by it. Would you be okay telling us more about it? what kind of experiences have you had throughout your life? what do you do? why do you think you enjoy it? how does it feel? that sort of thing, and anything else you want to add.

>>8547675
Somewhat close to puberty I discovered that pain feels good to me and started to experiment. I like feeling painful pressure on my body, I like the feeling of something pinching me, crushing me, I like the feeling of being cut and being burned. I crave that fire in my nerves, I crave the spcific stimulation of pain, it feels like my whole body is a sex organ. I don't just want to feel pain, I want to be overstimulated, I want to feel the full limit of what's even possible to feel. I don't like hurting myself because i feel guilty and ashamed of my feelings. I don't want to leave marks, I don't want people (in person) to find out, I don't like to feel like this need controls me. But I constantly crave and fantasize about someone giving me what I want, I fantasize about someone abducting me and torturing me to death for their own pleasure. Threatening objects like knives or power tools, guns and things like that make me uncomfortable, they're exciting aoknd tempting. I wish I had none of these feelings and I try my best to fight them

>>8547364
That's even hotter actually. What's the most extreme thing you've done or had done to you?

And where do I find a girl like you? I know there are people out there, but it's not like you can just ask someone.

S O M E O F T H E M W A N T T O B E A B U S E D

I wish you could take some of my pain, my face and skull constantly aches

>>8550593
Broken bones is the most extreme pain I've felt and the best feeling.

>And where do I find a girl like you?
I wouldn't have the slightest idea, I've never met anyone like me

>>8550618
I would if I could

>>8546295
Sometimes pain outweighs living everyday life, I have found thinking about the long term scars will help to stop.

>>8546295
looks like this is my kinda thread

>>8547960
wew
>tfw one of the very first times I was aroused as a kid was when I was watching TV late at night and Hellraiser came on

all my kinky friends from uni have moved away to other parts of the country now that uni's over, idk how to find all-new lewdfriends at 22 :/

>>8547960
Damn, we could have great conversations lol

>>8552897
Let's have one anon

>>8552939
In real life , far to great of conversations to have on 4chan. (Coming from someone who self-harms) ignore all of these sum of the earth shidiots who have no idea

>>8553072
I'm scared to talk about these feelings in person, I'd much rather talk about them anonymously where there's no risk

>>8553075
Well obviously, I just mean the topic is too complex to discuss over 4chan. To sum it up: the only thing that helps me not to self harm is the thought of the actual scars themselves. This is an alternative I have chosen from xanax and weed, and I don' think 1 percent of the 4chan population understands things I have been though or others like myself.

>>8553075
Again, it just stops me from my anxiety attacks which the only other option for me is drugs or killing myself.

>>8553092
>I just mean the topic is too complex to discuss over 4chan
Why do you think so?

What stops me from self harm is just the immense self-hatred I feel for wanting to. I feel so ashamed and guilty that it makes me want to kill myself. I actually like the scars I have, I get turned on when I run my finger over them, but the thought of someone else seeing my scars makes me want to stop existing. I dream of other people hurting me because then it's their choice, it frees me from the guilt. I obsess about other people hurting me.

I don't take any medicine other than HRT and I don't smoke or anything so I don't really know how to take my mind off of it at all, I'm always always thinking about it.