How it really is

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God
How it really is 2017-06-26 02:23:49 Post No. 8498192
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How it really is God 2017-06-26 02:23:49 Post No. 8498192 [Report]

Most days when I wake up I just want to to back to sleep. I failed every single person in my life that I've known. I live in a rotting 850 dollar one bedroom apartment with my roomate and the landlord barely takes care of it at all.

I've mentally already gave up on my transition, but I still force myself to take HRT even though the spiro sort of makes me sick. I have a boyfriend but he only loves me out of convince. I only stay with him because I don't want to make him sad and I hate the feeling of being alone. I have a constant need for hugs/cuddles.

I can no longer smoke weed or drink much alcohol/coffee, due to a debilitating state of mind doing cheap LSD left me in. I hear voices in my head, they just tell me how I'm a piece of shit in every way possible. My own brain wants me to kill myself as far as logic goes.

Why am I still alive?

Anonymous 2017-06-26 02:28:22 Post No.8498210
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Anonymous 2017-06-26 02:28:22 Post No.8498210 [Report]

>cheap lsd
You mean bunk lab chems?

Anonymous 2017-06-26 02:30:07 Post No.8498218
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Anonymous 2017-06-26 02:30:07 Post No.8498218 [Report]

>>8498210
Could be 1p-lsd, it's pretty cheap.

Anonymous 2017-06-26 02:37:48 Post No.8498238
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Anonymous 2017-06-26 02:37:48 Post No.8498238 [Report]

>>8498192
You are still alive because you know in your heart that you can make it if you try, but if you kill yourself you'll be admitting that you are just a coward.

Anonymous 2017-06-26 02:42:27 Post No.8498255
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Anonymous 2017-06-26 02:42:27 Post No.8498255 [Report]

>>8498238
it takes bigger balls to pull a trigger on yourself than it does to get trampled all over by life and accept it as a norm

Anonymous 2017-06-26 02:45:23 Post No.8498263
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Anonymous 2017-06-26 02:45:23 Post No.8498263 [Report]

>>8498192
How did the voices start?

Anonymous 2017-06-26 02:57:31 Post No.8498310
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Anonymous 2017-06-26 02:57:31 Post No.8498310 [Report]

>>8498255
Not really. Death is cheating, you can't just kill yourself and be done with it. A person who would kill themselves does not deserve the gift of death.

Anonymous 2017-06-26 05:57:22 Post No.8499219
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Anonymous 2017-06-26 05:57:22 Post No.8499219 [Report]

>>8498192
Hey, You seem pretty fucked up. My ex was trans and she ended up killing herself after we broke up. Unfortunately I have a pretty bad track record with helping people out but if you wanna hang out or talk or play some games here's my steam.

http://steamcommunity.com/profiles/76561198065749268/

Same thing goes for anyone else in the thread who wants to just chill out or talk or whatever.

I'm aware that Imgur.com will stop allowing adult images since 15th of May. I'm taking actions to backup as much data as possible. Read more on this topic here - https://archived.moe/talk/thread/1694/

I'm aware that Imgur.com will stop allowing adult images since 15th of May. I'm taking actions to backup as much data as possible.
Read more on this topic here - https://archived.moe/talk/thread/1694/