I hate being trans. A lot of people I talk to say "wow Autumn,

now now Autumn let daddy suck on those delicious supple twinkhon conetits.

write your essay darling

Its okay love. Being trans is a bad hand to be dealt, but that just means you have to work harder than alot of people to be happy. Its not as simple for us, we have to do things that other people don't, and sometimes things get so hard you want to give up and go to heaven. But if you fight for it, there really is a beautiful world waiting for you out here, and you have a place in it. Stay strong friend.

I'm a cis guy, I could never understand what exactly it is that trans people feel, but, looking from an outside perspective the drugs, the surgeries, the discrimination, to really just look different seems so not worth it. Again, I have no clue as to the intensity of your feelings and I doubt it could be equated to anything I've experienced, but it seems to me like learning to live with your body would be so much more preferable to actually dealing with the situation and trying to fix it.

>>8440585
Without the drugs it's even worse because I'm stuck in a body I hate. I just want to take my own life.

>>8440585
Passing is pretty chill, it's the BDD and the standards on this site that makes it absolute hell.

>>8440416
I'm sorry. Be well.

>>8440487
That's actually really beautiful. Hope OP feels better.

>>8440416
>I hate shooting myself with drugs just to be fucking happy
but you get to be happy?
whats lacking in your life that you actually CAN change?

>>8440585
you cant 'learn' it, you can neglect or repress it
but it will always nag you and make you unhappy even unconsciously and the moment you change something - even small things like shaving your legs or wearing low key female clothes or just roleplayin female online - it makes you fell much better, it becomes almost addictive for how much positive and negative feedback you get from your own brain

Ive been neglecting so much and learned to accept and live with it but Im deeply unhappy and neurotic - I ve become barely functional

>>8440419
hot

>>8440870
This.

Perma-repressing but self aware AGP here.

Been unhappy for the first 10 years of AGP, I can last another 46

>>8440585
Imagine you had a leech on your skin, you'd feel disgusted by it right, and you'd want to get it off. Now imagine you can't get it off you'd feel frustrated right? After a while can you see how having that leech there for as long as you can remember you'd get depressed and feel trapped by it. Maybe you learn how to disconnect from your body but every time you brush up against that leech or any time someone talks about leeches you get reminded that that leech is still there. Now imagine that feeling over your whole body, that's what my dysphoria is like at it's worse. Can you see how taking drugs my whole life, being discriminated against, possibly looking like some half man half woman amalgamation and being worried about if you meet the wrong person and you get completely beat up is preferable to that fucking leech? Now imagine some asshole who's never even seen a leech goes, "why don't you learn to love that leech?", can you imagine how that feels? Because that's how I feel reading your shit.

>>8440416
It's sucks like hell that's for sure. Hopefully you're like me and started transition before it was too late.

>>8440487
This made me feel a little better

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>>8440416
Feel for you OP.