What are your thoughts on asexuality and asexuals?

>>8430024
best orientation desu.
Couple it with schizoid personality "disorder" and you've got the recipe for an extremely mentally stable human being.

>>8430024
I don't doubt it exists, but I do doubt the majority of people who claim to be it. And I certainly don't think that being asked by your grandma "when are you finally going to get a girlfriend?" Constitute being an oppressed minority.

>>8430127
Well, SPD people probably identify as aro/ace mostly because dealing with people is bothersome, so having to either
>a) share a part of your life in a non-casual way
>b) going intimate for a while
is just very exhausting and uncomfortable. I easily fill the diagnostic criteria for SPD, but we're still going through the motions to get the diagnosis out.

No fucking wonder I have a serious fetish for disinterested partners during sex.

>>8430155


Except that historically, people have absolutely been targeted as queer for asexual behavior.

Everybody feel free to grab a beverage and get comfortable, because I spent a lot of time on Google today. (Asexuals, listen up, because we actually have some situations where you are represented in history here.)

>>8430630

Historically, people got labelled queer, and/or queer-bashed, for two major things.

The first was deviating from strict gender norms.

The second was not having hetero sex.

There are tons of examples of white people literature from the 1800s and early 1900s that use terms like “confirmed bachelor” and “spinster aunt” to imply that somebody was queer.

(I was going to say something like European/American/Canadian literature, but let’s call a spade a spade.)

Sure, nowadays we look back at that and go, “everybody knew those people were gay, it was just code for gay, nobody thought anybody was asexual, that wasn’t a thing back then.”

Of course, that still means that people who we would now call asexual would have been getting queer-bashed because people thought they were gay. So all those asexual people, already, have earned their queer stripes under the rubric above – that they are part of a community that got violently oppressed for being perceived as queer.

>>8430634

It’s also worth pointing out that as far back as the 1890s, the LGBT movement – which did already exist, and was particularly active in Germany and New York – was already beginning to categorize and write about asexuality as part of its umbrella.

But is that all that was happening? Were straight people actually cool with people who they thought just weren’t having any sex at all?

Let’s see! (This is code for “hell no.”)

My favorite example that I came across was the Spinster Movement.

The Spinster Movement was really long-lived, from around the 1880s through the 1930s. It was a group of women who either felt no sexual attraction, or felt some sexual attraction but didn’t want to have sex. (I will be the first to say that I’m sure that there were also members who nowadays would identify as lesbian, bi, and trans. But it wasn’t the focus.)

The movement particularly focused on opposing sex work, sex trafficking, and child sexual abuse. It was deeply tied up in the suffrage movement, which fought for the vote specifically so that women could oppose these things in the political arena. (There’s a lot more about this in a book called The Spinster and Her Enemies, by Sheila Jeffreys.)

It spanned a wide range of countries. Norwegian researcher Tone Hellund talks about how first the group was considered queer because they were breaking gender norms. And then:

>>8430636

“[in Norway], in the 1920s and 1930s, female sexuality was suddenly discovered and all women were supposed to have and enjoy their sexuality. At this point, frigidity and asexuality also became a topic, a very problematic topic.

“You could say that the spinsters became queer because they didn’t have sex or didn’t take part in sexual activities, and also because they started to be perceived as potentially homosexual.

“Thus, the romantic spinster friendships of the earlier phase that were not seen as problematic in a sexual way became highly problematic in the 1920s and 1930s. Suddenly, all female relationships were seen as suspicious, they were seen in a new sexual light.“

Notice the “and also” – they were queer for not having sex, AND they were queer for starting to be perceived as possibly lesbians.

In fact, “spinsters” were routinely slammed this way. In Britain, for example, the teachers’ union was attacked over and over with the double spectre of asexuality and lesbianism.

One example from Women’s History: “…The fear of spinsters and lesbians affected women teachers in Britain between the wars. A 1935 report in a newspaper of an educational conference expressed the threat in extreme terms: ‘The women who have the responsibility of teaching these girls are many of them themselves embittered, sexless or homosexual hoydens who try to mould the girls into their own pattern.’” It was very explicit.

And the whole thing is a common accusation that queer people still face today. That what we are is bad because it is going to destroy children and society.

>>8430639

People at the time felt very strongly about how unnatural it was for people not to have sex. Women, in particular, were often divided into “natural” and “unnatural” – i.e. queer – spinsters. Natural ones were widows; unnatural ones were those we have seen here.

In her book “Family Ties in Victorian England,” Claudia Nelson quotes writer Eliza Linton’s description of “unnatural and alien” spinsters: “Painted and wrinkled, padded and bedizened, with her coarse thoughts, bold words, and leering eyes, [the wrong kind of spinster] has in herself all the disgust which lies around a Bacchante and a Hecate in one…. Such an old maid as this stands as a warning to men and women alike of what and whom to avoid.”

We can see some of the hatred of the Spinsters in the way suffragists were treated when arrested for picketing the White House. They were tortured, beaten, hung by their hands all night, fed rotten food, and subjected to attempted psychiatric abuse.

Earlier, during the Victorian era, there was a popular but unsuccessful movement, for decades, pushing to evict spinsters over 30 from Britain, and send them to Canada, Australia, or the United States instead. They were perceived, at best, as “surplus females”, in part because there were many more women than men in the population there at that time.

There was some overlap between the different kinds of queer. Straight people, as a group, had even less understanding and interest then than they do now of what the different flavors of queer might be.

>>8430644

Shannon Jackson’s essay, “Toward a Queer Social Welfare Studies,” gives a good example of how describes how critics of Jane Addams’ Hull-House “called the settlement ‘unnatural,’ worrying that its women were ‘spinsters’ or that its men were ‘mollycoddles’.” In that case, I would guess that they meant “women who have sex with women”.

It’s a good example of how much they conflated the different kinds of queer – that some straight people could use the term to slam people for being asexual, and others could use it to slam people for the opposite. And it’s also a good example of how little they cared which of us they were attacking. The important thing, to them, was that we weren’t having solely hetero sex and living our lives centered around being hetero. Everything else was just details.

(Also FWIW, I want to note that I meant no disrespect to any of the previous commenters or the OP in cutting the previous posts from queerdemons lesbiandoe @punkrcgers and sushi-moss. Tumblr wouldn’t let me post my long-ass reply without trimming; it mysteriously “lost” the whole thing like it always does when I reply at length to a long thread, and I had to rewrite it.)

(btw all this was copypasta and it was not written by me)

>>8430155
Many, many people would look down upon (with great distaste) someone trying to "fix" a gay person. And yet aces get "You just haven't met the right guy/girl." "Maybe it's a hormonal thing." and, the most poignant "Maybe you're gay." BEING GAY is seen as preferable because at least you're having sex which is obviously the only thing human beings were really born to do.

>>8430630
you guys faced so much discrimination that prudishness, sexual restraint and celibacy were desirable things in a lot of civilizations.

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>>8430024
>What are your thoughts

I think they are pretty boring.
Also, I'm not sure why they are even a thing.
I mean nobody is going to take away your rights or try to fire you from your job or kick you out of your housing because you're not having sex.
Nobody is telling you that you can't marry someone and not have sex.
Nobody is bullying you for being a virgin.
Okay, maybe they are but does that mean you need to be demand that your virgin ass get a letter in the LGBTQIA clubhouse?
Just live your life and don't have sex if that's your thing.
Why do you feel the need to tell everyone?
"Hey everyone! I'm not having sex! I'm not sexually attracted to anyone! But I still like to masturbate! Just not sex though! KThanksBai!"
Seriously?
Boring.

>>8430024
Why do Americans feel the need to have opinions about everything? especially when there's no reason to have an opinion

>>8430634
>let’s call a spade a spade
"let's be less specific and sound dumber"
wew lad

>>8430825
why are they boring? they can still be kinky and have high sex drive. it's also very difficult to find partners that are ok with no penetrative sex

>>8430024
I think all those obscure sexualities are responsible for the idea that gay people "have enough rights" and it's time to "move on to more important battles"

>>8430888
Lol gay people are the worst

>>8430825
>"Hey everyone! I'm not having sex! I'm not sexually attracted to anyone! But I still like to masturbate! Just not sex though! KThanksBai!"

Some sex-positive asexuals do have sex

>>8430894
I'd tell you to go choke on a dick but you'd probably call that oppressive

>be unknowingly asexual
>gf always upset with me
>why don't you find me sexy
>i do baby
>no you don't
>i don't feel wanted
>you don't even look at me when I get naked
>I do baby you're beautiful
>why don't we have sex
>why aren't you hard
>why aren't you aroused
>do you even love me
>do you just think I'm cute
>i just want to feel desired

she broke up with me eventually. later on i realised that I'm ace. but now I'm afraid of relationships cause girls want sex and I can't get hard for sex and I don't give a shit about naked bodies, sexy pictures, and i don't notice boobs/ass

And there's no decent asexual dating app, and then there's like 10 asexuals nearby and none of them compatible personality-wise

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>>8430942
also

>try fetlife
>surely kink people will understand me
>and I'm kinky too!
>jackpot right?
>nope.jpg

>>8430949
and I wasn't like "OH BTW DID U KNOW IM ASEXUAL :DD" she just said she wants her sub to be in chastity 24/7 and I was like "that's ok but for the record I'm asexual"

and it wasn't just a chastity arrangement, it was a whole D/s lifestyle arrangement but I guess sex part is too important even there. and when I browse profiles everyone has super sexualised latex pics and I just think to myself "shit they gonna be upset I don't find their outfits sexy

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>>8430898
Are they really asexual if they are having sex?

>>8430959
and I don't give a shit about being accepted in le lgbtqia+++ clan fuck y'all and your bullshit I just wanna be happy

>>8430960
Yeah if they are not sexually attracted to someone (and through some miracle they can stay hard during sex) they can have sex to please the other party or purely out of physical pleasure (like they masturbate)

I also had sex and I enjoyed it but it's impossible for me to stay hard so the girl kept slapping me during sex cause I'm into submission and that worked for me and I had a good time

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>>8430942
>I don't give a shit about naked bodies

What do you do all day?
Like, seriously?
If I didn't look at porn all day I honestly don't know what I'd do with my time.

>>8430972
I'm kinky m8 I watch messed up porn

>>8430959
lol and the ironic thing is there are actually straight guys in relationships with asexual girls...

>>8431031
at least asexual girls can have sex if they want to please their partner ;_; (or so I think)

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>>8430973
I-i see...
*backs away slowly*

>>8431040
>hasn't heard of vaginismus

i guess if they use a lot of lube?

>>8431056
i guess i can use viagra too

>>8431100
viagra doesn't make you horny
it just increases blood flow to your nether regions
(there is a difference, trust me)

>>8431148
that's fine I just want to have sex to please the other person, not out of horniness. I perform oral sex a lot even if it doesn't make me horny at all, just because I want to please them sexually. But I can't do sex cause I'm not hard

>>8430024
asexuality exists but it is not queer, it is not a part of the spectrum or whatever. asexuals dont get the shit kicked out of them, never got burned or hanged or all that shit. they didnt fight a war to stay alive

i dont think anyone was ever denying that asexuality existed until people started saying that it was something you can create the foundation of your entire identity on

>>8432454
Wikipedia:

>Queer is an umbrella term for sexual and gender minorities who are not heterosexual or not cisgender.

Asexuals are not heterosexuals when you assume the view where people have both a sexual orientation and a romantic orientation

>>What does sexual attraction feel like?
>At its strongest, it is commonly described as a feeling of hunger, except for people. It can include tingling feelings in your head or elsewhere, feeling hot inside your body, or general tension and the uncontrollable need to touch someone. Summed up, it is the desire to be sexual with someone.


Is this actually true?

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>>8432494
that's like saying bisexuals aren't faggots

>>8433376

>maybe they just sucked at it

heteroromantic virgin male here

How does this even work? I mean, I'm pretty sure you can get a ruptured anus or be incapable of giving deep throat, but don't most people just do vaginal sex? How do you mess that up?

>>8432494
>a sexual orientation and a romantic orientation

stop this nonsense and return to tumblr at ONCE

>>8433693
What the fuck do you mean? Asexuals don't feel sexual attraction--do you deny the existence of asexuality? However, they still feel romantically attracted to a gender or more. What's even there to argue?

Asexuals are the queens of the oppression olympics

>>8433671
mood, atmosphere, she complains, you have trouble putting into the hole, you stop being hard, the vagina/penis is too big/small, you come too quickly, bad pacing, she keeps moving and your rhythm is wrong, she is bored, she is not sexually attracted to you and gets annoyed, plenty of things can go wrong, especially if you fuck with a bitch

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>>8430825
I think the biggest form of discrimination asexuals face is a life devoid of love. A lot of sexual people may downplay this fact, because they have never actually had to think about how tightly intertwined love and sex are in society. Think about it for a minute: you were born asexual, and just like being gay or trans its NOT a choice, and now you are basicly doomed to be forever alone. I mean, say what you like about asexuals, at the end of the day, love is a fundamental human need. People don't die from lack of sex(contrary to common belief) ...but lack of love, lack of love KILLS.

>>8433793
you sound like a faggot with low t tbqh

>>8433793

>you have trouble putting into the hole

do sexuals really do this?

>>8433824
you sound like a retard

>>8433816
Just like a gay man is incompatible with a straight man, an asexual is incompatible with other people
Shit sucks but don't blame the world for people not wanting to be with you

>>8433816
My gf loves me so not sure what the fuck you're talking about bitch

>>8433842
I'm not blaming anyone, I'm just bringing up this fact up to sexual people who may be so privileged they have not even considered what a HUGE disadvantage it is.

Asexuals are sexy

>>8430024
You do you.

I know some neet dwellers that might as well be ace.
I know one girl that USED to be ace, but she just had terrible anxiety. Later she got a (boring, unattractive) boyfriend when it promised housing and income.

>>8430609
is it worth getting the diagnosis?

>>8430024
Sex is important for relationships, I would never date anyone with no sex drive unless they are ok with me having sex with other people. Why the fuck would I have any partner if I can't have sex with them? I'd rather have a nice friend with cuddles or something like that

>>8430024
Sex is important for relationships, I would never date anyone with no sex drive unless they are ok with me having sex with other people. Why the fuck would I have any partner if I can't have sex with them? I'd rather have a nice friend with cuddles or something like that

>>8435664
>>8435666

>implying anyone would date you faggot

>>8435666
asexuals can have sex drive my dawg stop posting

>>8433844
I think their point is that its very hard for asexuals to be in relationships

Im happy you found someone that loves you and being sexually incompatible was not a dealbreaker

its not that real, i would say about 1% at most of people who say they are arent. I dont enjoy sex like ever, but im attracted to guys, I want attention from guys. I want sexual attention from guys, but i dont enjoy it. I dont think this makes me asexual. I think this just makes me strange and conflicted like most of humanity.

>>8435681
I'm not one for fancy labels but if I was forced to go with a term I feel is closest to how I feel I'd probably land on grey/demi

I usually just say bi/not interested for simplicity since I don't particularly enjoy explaining myself to people.

>>8435670
No, really, what's the difference between a friend and a partner who doesn't want to have sex? Why the hell would I condemn myself to a life of wanking?

>>8435669
It's a little late for that, I'm still a little upset since my gf's sex drive is much lower than mine...

>>8435678
It's hard but that doesn't mean you can't find love lmao

>>8435681
Um asexuality doesn't mean you don't enjoy sexual attention lmao, it just means you yourself don't feel sexual attractions to others. whether you enjoy it or not depends on different persons

>>8435741
asexuals can have sex tard stop posting shit

>>8435912
Ok, then how the hell is an asexual different from any non asexual person?

>>8435922
they dont feel sexual attraction to others. BUT THEY CAN STILL HAVE SEX DRIVE. libido =/= sexual orientation

>>8435928
Well then they will never want sex with other people but for pleasing them or satisfying any kink that requires another person. Which leads to a sexless relationship. Not my field anyways since I'll never date any asexual person

>>8435949
Some enjoy sex my man. The same way they enjoy masturbation and intimacy. Anyway, no one's trying to convince you to date anyone; I'm just hoping you stop spreading misconceptions about asexuality

>>8430609
>>8430634
>>8430636
>>8430639
>>8430647
I always wonder how can people like you write all of this and make yourself believe you are actually smart.
Without a minimum of selfawareness of the fallacies of what you are saying.
It's scary.

Also the fact that people still use ''queer'' and ''tumblr'' unironically is cringy.

>>8436076
It's just pure unadulterated word vomit. They know nobody will be able to refute all their points without taking a huge amount of their personal time, so it's an automatic "win" in their book.

''Asexual are discriminated by society >:(''
Noo don't tell me ?
So the majority of society who has sexual attraction and has sexual feelings,sees a group of people that has no sexual attraction at all,statistically live a lonely and depressed life and have also been mentally ill and society thinks of them as...BAD?

>>8436089
>>8436076
That was a copy paste idiots

But feel free to try to refute this

>Sure, nowadays we look back at that and go, “everybody knew those people were gay, it was just code for gay, nobody thought anybody was asexual, that wasn’t a thing back then.”

>Of course, that still means that people who we would now call asexual would have been getting queer-bashed because people thought they were gay.

In other words, saying asexuals were not oppressed is very debatable because "asexuals" didn't exist as a community/label, but they obviously existed in the same way they exist today. So not only they didn't have an explanation for their behavior or a community to relate to, but their lack of sexual attraction might've wrongly labeled them homosexuals for refusing to have sexual intercourse with women

>>8436109
Yes, cause, statistically, society doesn't believe asexuality exists so they think they're closet gays or faggots with no testosterone

I've also seen people saying aro aces aren't LGBTQ+ and lovely things like "mental illness isn't an orientation." Another sentiment I've seen a lot is "this isn't aphobia because aphobia isn't real." The ace-exclusionaries seem to think that aces aren't real and we're just delusional/sick/trying to get attention and/or even if we do exist we don't rank high enough in the oppression olympics to meet their standards. It's annoying and disrespectful af.

>>8436406
Thank you for this post.

Today I learned you can be asexual and hypersexual at the same time, even if it sounds stupid.

>>8430825
>Nobody is bullying you for being a virgin
Virgin shaming and bullying exists.

I'm mixed on it. I've no problem with the concept or any asexuals, I think it's real and valid and have no interest in pathologizing it if a person doesn't feel it's causing them trouble. I think it's not mutually exclusive with being of any particular orientation, either.

however, I do resent people trying to term asexuality as being a part of LGBT in of itself. I think it's important include asexuality within it, in order to let LGBT people whose sexuality isn't overt or present at all know that they're still welcome, but there's nothing innately "queer" about it. all the discoursing about it I see seems pretty idiotic and pointless to me.

additionally, I do believe that any time people point to marginalization asexual people face they're actually just misunderstanding other more tangible shit as being related to asexuality.

I'm not sure how much of a thing it is outside of curated social media posts that ill tempered people (like yours truly) like to get outraged about. I've never personally interacted with an asexual who bothered me - who wasn't a kid and still figuring themselves out, which is expected and understandable - and I'm not about shitting on kids online, dumb opinions or not.

>>8436670
literally his next sentence in the post

>>8436707
>I think it's not mutually exclusive with being of any particular orientation, either.
Well, in the asexual community, naturally people use sexual orientation and romantic orientation as different concepts, so "heterosexual" refers to sexual attraction to the opposite sex, thus cannot contain asexuality

>>8436707
>but there's nothing innately "queer" about it.

see
>>8432494

>>8436707
asexuals were marginalised in the past like this >>8436163 and nowadays is more subtle

>>8436824
I don't find gender/romantic orientation disagreeable in the slightest, but not being markedly heterosexual doesn't make someone queer. but, then again, my concern with it is largely theoretical, so whatever.

>>8436830
I feel like that isn't a particularly good example. but I don't disagree that people are given flack for not having sex, but I'm not sure how that constitutes marginalization in any sort of sociological sense or how it is even strictly related to being asexual.

sorry if I'm coming across as rude or not compassionate, by the way, I'm trying to talk in pretty broad terms about it and not so much about individual experience, y'know?

>>8436898
>but not being markedly heterosexual doesn't make someone queer.
Well it does according to that Wikipedia definition. I assume you have a different definition? I personally don't have any opinion on this by the way.

>>8436898
>I'm not sure how that constitutes marginalization in any sort of sociological sense
If you mean in the past, then by being thought of being gay and being marginalized by the same standards ( e.g. https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/He_never_married where you were considered homosexual if you weren't attracted to women. similar to asexual women / spinster aunt)

>>8430959
Well, duh.

Chastity is about control. The goal is for the sub to be sexually frustrated. The hope of being allowed a rare orgasm is what makes a sub putty in the domme's hand.

You had no handle for her to grip. You also seem to be basing the entire site on one interaction, but that's your problem for giving up early.

>>8436917
Old Maids werent discriminated against though.

And many men who never married back then literally were homosexual.

>>8436947
Old maid was literally used pejoratively though? You mean they weren't stoned to death?

Yeah many were homosexual, some were not. Proportionally, demographic studies seem to indicate that asexuals are very rare so it's natural that they're equally rare in other samples as well

>>8436943
>The hope of being allowed a rare orgasm is what makes a sub putty in the domme's hand.
Some asexuals have a sex drive and masturbate and enjoy/desire orgasms...

>>8437089
that's not asexual
that's avoidant personality disorder

I honestly don't know what asexuality is anymore, I can literally fuck everything I see but still be called asexual as long as I don't have any romantic feelings? That's just being a sociopath

>>8437188
that's aromantic

>>8437199
Then asexuality is just not wanting sex then?

>>8437206
I believe the most basic and literal definition is not having sexual desire/attraction

Though some identifying asexuals can or don't really mind having sex they don't want for it. Kind of like giving head to satisfy your partner even if you're not getting excitement out of it.

>>8437216
I think what I'm confused by is all these exceptions asexuals have for themselves
Im gonna guess that they mostly exist solely because romantic partnerships with people fall apart if theyre not getting any sexual satisfaction from it but then I hear stuff like "actually people can be asexual and still want this or that" or whatever and it's really confusing

>>8437253
because if you're not confident in being gay or straight shit gets weird

>>8437253
that's because it's not a real thing.
having low testosterone is a medical situation, not a meme identification

>>8437177
no it's not

>>8437188
>I see but still be called asexual as long as I don't have any romantic feelings?
romantic orientation is not sexual orientation

>>8437216
>I believe the most basic and literal definition is not having sexual desire/attraction
you can have sexual desires (e.g. fetishes) but not sexual attraction *to people*

>>8437253
they dont experience sexual attraction to people, that's all there is to it. there are no exceptions. the fact that they masturbate, the have a sex drive, they can have sex etc are not exceptions because "no sexual attracion to people" does not preclude any of these

>>8437258
they can have high sex drive tard

>>8437350
how do you feel about greysexuals? low t bisexuals? sociopaths?

ITT: problems that aren't real as of like 2002

>>8437354
grey-asexuals are very many things: they may be people who are predominantly asexuals but felt sexual attraction like 3 times for 10 seconds so they know they have this capability but functionally they are asexuals. or they may be demisexuals, or just sexuals with very low sex drive

overall i don't know much about them and even less about bisexuals/sociopaths

>>8437350
>the fact that they masturbate, the have a sex drive, they can have sex etc are not exceptions because "no sexual attracion to people" does not preclude any of these
Uh, you need other people to have sex
So asexual people see sexual partners the way guys see prostitutes?

>>8437509
>Uh, you need other people to have sex
yeah but you don't need to be sexually attracted to them

>So asexual people see sexual partners the way guys see prostitutes?
not necessarily; they may engage in sex for the benefit of the partner so very unlike client-prostitute relationship. even if they do it to serve their own sex drives, it's still likely a mutual pleasure; it's just that they don't exerpeince sexual attraction to the partner (but they may experience romantic/aesthetic/sensual/platonic/etc attractions)

>>8437523
So asexuals can have a partner, have sex, have a sex drive, and everything included within mainstream sexualities, but as long as they don't get boners while looking at attractive people they're still asexual???

>>8437544
yeah

>>8437551
Oh then I'm asexual, I was thinking I was bisexual all the time, I'm gonna tell my girlfriend tomorrow after sex.

>>8437714
lmao godspeed anon

>>8437714
if it helps google cupiosexual or check out https://www.asexuality.org/en/forum/72-the-gray-area-sex-and-related-discussions/

http://fieldoftheother.tumblr.com/post/66046466795/what-is-asexual-elitism

>>8437724
No, really, the human body doesn't attract me at all, I've always masturbated to kinky porn and had sex under some kind of domination/submission or other fetish environment,and if it was real I made it up in my mind. Really, I'm gonna tell my grilfriend, she's gonna be surprised since I'm also almost hypersexual.

>>8438343
i'm exactly the same anon

>>8430024
Low sex drive isn't a sexual orientation.

>>8438541
;^)

>>8438541
Is this from "How to troll asexuals"?

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Idk if it's my own bias but I appreciate people who choose asexuality far more than those who assert that asexuality 'chose' them.

>>8438553
Nothing wrong with pointing out things for retards. Just look at this >>8437523 load of crap.
Fucking special snowflakes.

>>8438570
what? are you talking about celibacy vs actual asexuality

>>8438613
it's ok brainlet, there's certain concepts that are beyond your understanding

>>8438639
Rest assured, normal people won't comprehend such a shitty explanation.
>I have sex and I like it and I'm asexual teehee

>>8438652
all my gfs did, but i dont date retards

>>8438663
A retard won't be able to make out other retards, retard.

>>8438673
k bro

What actually is "sexual attraction"? Is it looking at someone and being like "i want them to ram their crotch in my face"?

How would you describe it to lets say a robot, who surely hasn't experienced it.

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>>8438694
the definition of sexual attraction is still debated both in the community and in the academic research.

if you want my personal understanding--as an asexual who has never felt it--, i only know what i haven't felt that others seemed to have felt:

i know for example since i was a kid i never felt attracted to boobs/ass (i would literally not notice them, and i still don't), i never watched penetrative porn (only kinky), i never cared about naked bodies, i never felt anything whatsoever looking at playboy magazines or the likes, i never wanted to have sex with anyone, i never thought "damn i wanna bang that girl", etc

for example, when i look at pic related i have nothing close to a sexual reaction to anything. i just kinda look at her position, then at the colors of the photo, and i'm overall underwhelmed by this type of photos and never give them a second glance

some asexuals are more sex-favorable than i am though

>>8438735
yeah I've been trying to get a feel for how those "sex favorable" asexuals perceive things

for me it's like I have desires but no real target for them, if someone put a gun to my head and told me to describe what my ideal partner would be I don't think I'd be able to

>>8438802
maybe check out cupiosexuals for the more sex-favorable type of asexuals. /r/asexuality and AVEN are pretty good for this type of discussion too (i personally wish i was cupiosexual)

>>8438815
i hate it, I'd rather feel nothing

>>8438835
i guess grass is greener on the other side and we all gotta learn to live what we have

>>8438844
yeah i guess

i'm just really tired of having feelings I don't know how to describe or a place to put them

>>8438860
talk to the communities i mentioned; i'm sure you'll find people who relate to your experience and maybe help you out with some keywords or explanations about your feelings

>>8438869
Yeah, I'll do some more reading at the least, thanks.

>>8438878
good luck anon; understanding your sexuality is a complex journey

Although I am disinterested in sex, I do not claim to be asexual because:
1. This assumes that asexuality exists (I do not know if it does or does not).
2. If asexuality is confirmed to exist, I still may not be an asexual (eg. it could have a stricter definition than simple disinterest in sex).
3. The community is odious and I do not want to be associated with it.

>>8430668
Maybe being gay is preferable to being asexual. I'd personally rather be gay(which i am) than know that no one will satisfy me sexually/emotionally. If you find the right partner, they'll make your life a million times better. Not that you need a partner to be happy, but having a good one will definitely improve your life. I'd be sad to know that I can't have that the same way that others do.

>>8439176
did u mean to post this on tumblr

>1. This assumes that asexuality exists (I do not know if it does or does not).
what the fuck does this even mean

>>8440087
>no one will satisfy me sexually
that's because you don't have a sexual need idiot

and people can definitely satisfy you emotionally so idk what the fuck you're talking about

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So asexuality isn't actually a thing and just a semantic game for classifying people with sexual neurosis?

>>8440859
It's a sexual orientation

>>8440859
>just a semantic game

You could say that for anyone who thinks about sexuality at all

>>8440861
the a stands for allied
breeder gonna breed

>>8440866
LGBT+ is gay and stupid

>>8440869
black people and straight women killed the LGBT or whatever it's called these days

>>8440882
glad that aces are not part of your circus

>>8440888
asexuals didn't do anything ever except argue over if someone qualifies as asexual or not

>>8440897
that's usually the non-asexual people who don't even understand what it means; asexuals have done tremendous progress in being accepting that this is an entire sexual orientation and the members are very heterogeneous in their sexual behavior

>>8440904
>;

>>8440913
perfectly used semi-colon; i don't see your point. however, i wouldn't be surprised if someone who cannot grasp asexuality would also have problems grasping basic grammar rules

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pic related is asexual. what a waste.

>>8440928
looks like every loser high school kid with a bad haircut and no concept of washing their face

>>8440928
looks disgusting

>>8440936
but look at the dick sucking lips is my point. Like, those lips were bred to suck dick. millions and millions of years of evolution to suck dick, and apparently the asexual so unless they really need some money, they will never be put to use. It's a shame. Wasted prime dick sucking genes is a sad thing.

>>8440951
nah

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>>8440916
>nobody validat my tumblr identity
;(

>>8440978
IT SAYS PLEASE DO NOT REUPLOAD ASSHOLE

also idgaf if people """valditate"""" my sexual orientation. i only sort it out with my partners; the rest of y'all can go fuck yourselves

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>>8441022
>idgaf
i can see that
>i only sort it out with my partners
oh how hard it must have been );

>>8441067
not even sure what you want from me anymore tbqh family

>>8441106
>I remember when I came out to my friend from high school about it.
>I called her up to talk about it but then I got too scared to tell her because of the stories I've heard from others. I ended up just talking about other things that were bothering me. She knew something still wasn't right though and told me if I needed to talk to her again to call her, she would be there for me.
>Couple days later I ended up sending her a picture of a bracelet I made with our flag colors telling her to look them up and call me. When she called me back she was completely fine and understanding about it. She even said, "you've always have kinda been this way. It doesn't change who you are to me and that you're my friend"

What the fuck are these people talking about? Why would a *friend* give a fuck if you're asexual, I don't get it?

>>8441603
Didn't mean to quote nobody. Also I don't mean "why did they tell their friend" but rather "why did they expect any other reaction than 'it's ok dude'"

Didn't we use to have an ace general? What happened? How many asexuals are here

>>8437089
That's not asexual.

>>8441974
fuck off

>>8441838
just me

I really don't care either way if asexual people consider themselves LGBT. A lot of ace people will make the argument that they also get discriminated against like gay and trans people, but from what I've seen, the sexuality is either is met with confusion or disregard. Gay and trans people can garner a much stronger reaction of disgust when the topic is brought up, which is why I don't think that ace people are really thought of as truly "LGBT".
I get that some asexual people have a harder time dating because of the fact that many people value their sexual attraction to their partner as much as their romantic attraction, but there's nothing you can do about it. There's plenty of eager aspies on /acegen/ who are looking for love without the sex, so I'm sure that asexual people can find someone they're compatible with somewhere.

>>8442566
I'm ace and I have the exact same thoughts on everything you said

Is it only me who thinks the definition of asexuality has been bastardised so much that it's virtually unrecognisable from a few years ago?

And all the sub labels are pretentious af! It's literally become a staple for cishet teenagers to join in on the sexuality oppression Olympics and the funny thing is your not even that oppressed! Remember sapiosexual? LOL!

I have a friend who I'd consider asexual, no interest in sex, no interest in gaining a partner, not kinky at all, freaked out by the idea of doing anything sexual and she doesn't use the label cus she doesn't fucking need to.

I feel bad for the true asexuals who have had their sexuality (or lack of) hyjacked by a bunch of asstards.

>>8442891
>Is it only me who thinks the definition of asexuality has been bastardised so much that it's virtually unrecognisable from a few years ago?
No, the modern definition was first defined on AVEN in 2001, the Wikipedia article for asexuality has maintained the attraction-based definition since the page was created in 2002, and the academic research community has adopted the modern definition since 2004 by Anthony Bogaert.

>And all the sub labels are pretentious af!
The sublabels are useful for the asexual community, not for non-asexuals. For instnace, it helps to know that someone is interested in sex or sex-repulsed if I want to date them.

>she doesn't use the label cus she doesn't fucking need to.
Well, I do. I need to make it clear to a potential partner before we start dating, and I use it on dating websites so others can find me because being asexual is, unsurprisingly, an important thing when choosing partners.

I don't use the label for my casual friends/parents cause I don't see much of a reason for them to know

>I feel bad for the true asexuals who have had their sexuality (or lack of) hyjacked by a bunch of asstards.
It's just in your head; no one's hijacking anything. People explore it and learn more about it; asexuals should be thankful for the active community that drives the research and awarenes. Now we have ACEApp (Beta) for asexual dating, OKCupid ha filter to find only aexual, etc. This makes life easier so spreading awareness is helpfl

>>8442933
Look all I'm saying as someone standing from the the outside there needs to be a clear definition for you guys to be taken cus I honestly can't made heads nor tales of what asexuality actually is anymore.

>>8443075
Roughly, the definition for asexuality is generally agreed to be something along the lines of "someone who doesn't feel sexual attraction to anyone"

However, it's natural that this is a very loaded concept as science for so long conflated romantic attraction and sexual attraction as one single attraction, people mistake sexual orientation with sexual drive, the research is still very young, asexuals are relatively rare, and the definition of "sexual attraction" is vague.

So yes, outsiders are likely not to understand or believe we exist (hence "the invisible orientation"), the society is focused on other topics, and asexuality is not very trendy.

Luckily, there's a network of academics that take us seriously and fight to legitimize our orientation, and some other institutions that care enough to support us even if it doesn't help with social positioning / virtue signaling like supporting gender identity does. It's what it is, but slowly we'll make more progress and we'll have our shining moment someday too

Can I get an unironic answer for why asexuals need a political wing? Is there a significant population that has ever had legal, family, etc. trouble for being asexual compared with LGBT?

>>8441022
>IT SAYS PLEASE DO NOT REUPLOAD ASSHOLE
Why do the asexuals on /tttt/ all seem to have the maturity of 12 year olds?

>>8443386
because they are all 12?
once you go through puberty you realize you're not asexual

>>8443386
it was a joke retard

>>8443363
>Can I get an unironic answer for why asexuals need a political wing?
where did you read that?

>>8443545
Proving my point.

>>8443624
kys

le cake orientation XDD

>people here cant even understand asexuality

Aromanticism will blow your mind pals

>>8446557
aromanticism is *literally* the same with asexual but replace "sexual attraction" with "romantic attraction"

obviously, you have to understand what these terms mean and there's no shortcut to that; you gotta do self-reflection, read other experiences, learn about yourself, and eventually understand what they mean