Trans Help General #142

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I'm a 20 year old MtF who is too tall and wide to pass.
My parents and extended family love the idea of Jesus as an angry man with an AR15 shooting faggots and will hate me.
I'm attracted to women and would basically be abandoning any hope of finding love by growing boobs and modifying my genitals.
What's the point again?

>>8379522
a chance at being yourself. Fuck all the others.

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>tfw your repression game is improving but you develop a new anxious tick
I've never held the tips of my glasses by my mouth before and now I'm doing it almost all the god damn time when I'm alone (I catch myself starting to do it in public and stop). This is clearly a sign that this isn't healthy, right? Is it possible to repress for a chance at a cis life without taking on a ton of compulsive quirks?

Also what the fuck there's a ton of stock photos of this.

>>8377657
okay, also was in last thread.
my situation right now:
>19, tall, manly figure and bad hair
>living away from family because of my education which im failing entirely atm
history:
when i was a little child i remember that one situation where i was like 'im not a girl!', when i was 13-14 i started to think that im a girl. i was quite convinced actually, really had problems with my first name and saw my future as woman. after like one or two years i ignored it more and more until it wasnt really in my mind, occasionally the topic was popping up though and i was like 'yeh, i feel like id rather want to be a girl', to identify and to be seen as one. i had moments where i looked into the mirror and i saw a person but not me, there was just someone and i was always like 'thats my brother, but why is he in the mirror'. lately, like 2 months back, the topic started to pop up again and im really unsure if im actually trans or if its just a fetish or something. i got some clothing, trousers and blouses and stuff like that. it felt alright, but i just felt like a fag in womens clothing. this week i got a wig and my dresses arrived and these really gave me the feeling im female and let me feel well, also trying out some makeup today and i love to see me with it. id love to be female, i love the idea, but im born male so...i dont know if im just agp or something

cont incomming.

>>8380312
I used to do that until I got a big pimple behind my ear and had to go to the doctor to get it lanced.
Turns out the bacteria in your mouth shouldn't be transferred to the skin behind your ear.

how old is too old? 19 but my chest is wide, like bra size au18. i have long hair already and dress in females clothes a lot. how do i even get hrt in Australia? i could never do the mutilation part

>>8382100
cont.

went to a therapist last week and she said that my depressed episodes are probably something that i should consider going to a clinic for. also it would make me able to have more time with uni as i failed this and last semester really hard due to not being able to get myself outta bed pretty often and then id have a reason to take a break that doesnt influence my ability to get funding from the german government. i considered self medding ehich i probably eouldnt be able to do in a clinic which maked me doubt going there aswell but i dont wanna lose any time to transitionar at least try hormones, if its actually something i feel better with

also, can my parents being split up and not having a real father figure make me identify rather female than male? also having more female friends than male ones?

I was on 50mg cypro and 4mg progy for 4 months, now I've had to stop because of money temporarily. What can I expect to happen in the next few weeks

>>8377657
How bad is it to start at 24? God I want to kill myself for waiting so long.

>>8384177
Honestly not that bad. I've seen plenty of people who start later and end up passing, but as always earlier is better.

The best time to start HRT was five years earlier; the second best time is now.

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>>8384177
Past ~22 (varies depending on genetics of course) you should really only transition if you're going to kill yourself otherwise. Because if you're going to kill yourself you've nothing more to lose so just do it. You can go rob a bank for surgery money, you either get surgery or suicide by cop. Big win win.

Hi, I'm not sure if I'm trans but I think I might be. I'm wondering if anyone can give me some advice on how you know, because I'm pretty confused at the moment and not sure where to go or what to ask.

>>8382436
trans happens in utero, not due to environmental effects.

>>8384971
well thats ehy im struggling so much to actually say that im trans and such, just because im super fucking unsure. funnily enough, i dont wanna make the wrong decision and then, at some point, kms because of it, even though suicide was, as long as i didnt have hope to pass and that hormones and stuff actually help me, one of the things that seemed so attractive

I take my medications at 6AM everyday, but I have a blood test for my hormone levels at 10AM. Should I take them earlier? (At like, 2AM or something)-- And should I avoid eating as well?

>>8384971
Nobody knows that. Being trans can easily happen for numerous different reasons, as being trans just comes down to wanting to be female.

Is it true that my body won't become much more masculine after 18? My therapist says that and is using it as an excuse to gatekeep me.

>>8386223
Bullshit. Your body continues forever to grow up until around 25.

>>8386404
where can I get proof of this?
>inb4 don't be lazy and do research

>>8386404
Your brain reaches structural maturity at 25. Most people reach peak bone mass at 25-30 after the collar bone develops. The leg/thigh bones are structurally mature at around age ~19.

There is no clear "grown up/not grown up" delineation for the human species. Parts of us grow into middle age, parts of us are "complete" by 17.

>>8385984
>Being trans can easily happen for numerous different reasons
the medical community disagrees with you.

>>8385984
>numerous
Not the word I'd use for "two" myself but technically correct.

Still questioning. Pretty sure I'm trans because I feel like shit all the time and my body 'feels' wrong. However what's confusing me is that I have no visual problem with myself at all. I look in the mirror at my face, beard, body, penis and I have no problem with it at all. In fact I like what I see. I don't understand how I can be so aesthetically satisfied with my presentation but fell so shit internally. Conffused. Can anyone relate?

What if a doctor denies me the diagnosis? Super nervous because i have the appointment soon, kinda wish i would have answered the therapists guestions (they seemed super personal and i felt too awkward to answer so it was a lot uhmms and idks.) gonna kms if it's because of that.

hey i got a question.
what makeup would i use to cover beard stubble, when i shave it doesn't get rid of it completely so im looking for alternate strategy.

(i know nothing about makeup, i just started to look into it)

Hey I just found out my insurance covers SRS for MTFs, how do I go about getting this started. I'm in the Boston area, and I'm really poor too, so travel options are extremely limited.

>>8388139
I would love to know as well

Is there a way to talk to a therapist about gender issues on the NHS? Is it all done through GICs?

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I'm a closseted Ftm and I was wondering if there are any safe ways at all for binding if I can't buy a real binder. Asking cause I know ace bandages and tape are dangerous but I don't really know any other ways for binding.

Also, another question:
Does anyone know of a haircut that would help me look more masculine if I have a really feminine face? I've tried many different short haircuts before but none of them really help. I was thinking maybe something like pic related would work but I'm not really sure.

Does anyone in the DFW area know good support groups?
I've tried GEAR, but it's 50/50 just angry FtMs bitching about social justice and the patriarchy, and a bunch of ugly hons

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Anybody have any better places to buy spiro (in the UK)? This seems far too much considering I'm aiming for 200mg/day

>>8389471
Enjoy your literal 2-year waiting lists!

You could bring it up to a regular NHS therapist who knows less about trans issues than you do.

>>8387629
Two? BDD/anime, schizophrenia, autism, having an easily influenced personality, childhood trauma and just simple overthinking can all easily lead to becoming trans.
People are depressed and have shitty lives, so they try to find a cause they can blame it all on. Autism easily leads to overthinking about gender. People who have body dysphoria from anime or other causes obsess over their looks and starts mistaking it for gender dysphoria. All it takes is one convincing internet post, and they're convinced they're a tranny.
Thinking all trans people are trans for the same reasons is just wishful thinking, the truth is that people are complicated, we barely know anything about the brain and there's most likely an infinite amount of reasons for someone to start taking titty skittles.
It's not like people like this become unhappy, regret their decision and "destroy their lives", if they don't start they'll probably regret/think about it for the rest of their lives. Being touched as a kid doesn't mean their condition is any different than someone being "estrogenized in the womb", the treatment is all that's important, and the only known effective treatment is transitioning

>>8384177
Anything after 14 can go either way. It's all about height and how manly your skeleton is.

>>8380312
>tfw repression game isn't working

i can't see any future but suicide

i spend so much time just imagining my death

>I'm driving down the road and a semi going the other way swerves into my lane and kills me
>someone walks up to me at a red light and just shoots me in the head
>i die in my sleep
>I'm laying in my bed and a large axe comes and splits my head in half
>I'm laying in my bed and a large industrial press slams down and crushes my head

>>8380312
There's stock photos because it's a common female mannerism...

>>8390966
then don't repress?

>>8390953
>tfw 6'1
i mean, on one side i wear a dress and makeup and a wig and i have hopes and i feel cute but then reality crashs in all the times...

>>8390966
I actually know how you feel. I spend my day thinking about 2 things transitioning or ways to die. I wish I was a few years younger it's hard to transition when you know you will look like shit.

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>just learned about estrone and realized that every day I take a pill instead of injecting/patches is lost progress I'll never get back
the websites that sell patches/injections I could find doesn't ship to my country, and darknet packages all get caught in customs
what the fuck am I supposed to do? fuck this shitty country and its retarded systems

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>>8390982
>common female mannerism
Shit, maybe my repression game isn't as good as I thought it was

>>8393904
Wait what? Care to explain?

>>8393916
i don't know much about it, but apparently a lot of the estradiol you get from pills are converted into shitty estrone which is 10% as effective as estradiol and it will steal your precious E receptors and fuck up your progress
it's basically fucking everyone over

>>8393939
So you're telling me I need to get shots? Yikes.

>>8393939
patches master race

>>8394023
tfw patches are too expensive for a broke tranny like me

>>8388139
>>8389468
Use pink color corrector and full coverage concealer

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>>8389895
doesn't seem any good way to diy bind desu. but about the haircut, I'd recommend staying away from bangs as it can look like a pixie cut on a feminine face, I'd go for something like pic related, I know you're face has probably not masculinized to the point of zac efron at this point, but its a good option to stay away from pixie-like cuts and a long & manicured top w/ short sides

So I had researched all about how to start hrt in the US but I'm moving to Ireland in a couple of weeks and I don't know much about the process there. Anybody know how it works there? Ideally, what's the fastest way?

>>8396031
private clinics

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>Be me, 30 yo gay male
>be in a relationship for 10 years with bf
>have repressed tranny feels since middle school.
>bf knows this.
>cant transition cause i think he'd leave me.


Feels bad man.

>>8397289
What does he say about your tranny feelings?

>>8397629
Pretty much that he thinks he wouldn't be able stay with me

>>8396530
Assuming I'm poor

>>8398240
In that case NHS clinics that take two to three years for hrt.

>>8398421
Fuck me, and there's no way to speed it along? Convince them I'm extremely trans?

I'm going to my psychologist tomorrow to talk about starting hrt, (MTF) is there anything I should ask about specifically?

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I'm never going to fucking pass. I hate being male.

>tfw the school quarter is over and I never could bring myself to see the free counselors to at least start working through my shit
well, I guess if I get a well paying job I can see one later.

>>8399392
Ask them how the process works in your country, tell them you want to take hormones, ask them how and when you can see an endo.

A few more tips:
Be patient, if you are going to psych for HRT they will probably gatekeep you for a bit (unless you're in America, I heard they're less gatekeepey there).
Might be a good idea to go there presenting as female as possible to convince them you're trans if you want HRT ASAP.
They will probably want you to come out to family before starting HRT so if you haven't don ethat expect delays.
At least this has been my experience with psychs but europe is terrible for trans people and I hope you live in a better part of the world.

Is there any good trans discords or other things like that?

im 27, 6', hairy body, slender body not particularly masculine. Haven't started yet... kms?

>>8399367
Well showing up om girlmode on your first appointment is one thing. If you don't they don't believe you want it enough. Also don't mention any other mental problems you might have, because they'll try to fix that first.

>>8399367
You could self-medicate and skip all their bullshit.

is 35 too old to transition?

I wanna be beautiful like Lana

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=eP4eqhWc7sI

>>8400965
It is fairly old trans wise, you're not gonna look like lana at that age. Take your chances with hrt.

I've been looking into self castration lately. I would probably do it by banding, and it doesn't sound like it has that many risks. My only worry is about getting SRS later, there might not be enough skin to work with if I perform an orchi on myself.

I absolutely hate what I have down there, and would love an orchi, but I have to save for SRS so until then, banding myself sounds like a good idea. Or am I wrong?

>>8402150
>self-castration

That sounds like an awful idea

I've been self medding for over 3 years now and still don't have a prescription. What would be the fastest and easiest way for me to get an actual script? There aren't any informed consent clinics in my state, could I use one from another state or what's my best option here? I don't want to deal with a therapist right now.

>>8399898
Shoulder/hip ratio?

27 is pretty late to start. Sub-20 is ideal, up to 25 can push it if you're lucky. Past that you're not likely to get fantastic results.

30+ is don't bother.

>>8402153
Really? You should actually look into it. Banding sounds like a great option to me.

>>8402150
What? Holy fuck, no, don't cut your fucking dick off. Are you goddamn crazy?

If you want SRS, get fucking SRS. Home-surgery is a surefire way to end up with infections, you'll probably fucking die.

I get that you hate your dick, but if you're going to get rid of it, do it the right way.

Seriously. Please don't cut off your penis.

>>8402171
An orchi is only getting rid of the testes. It's really not that big of a deal, you seem kind of clueless.

24, 5'9, 17" shoulders, only thing is my face has a few obviously masculine features. How fucked am I?

>>8402178
I know what an orchiectomy is, but when you talk about castrating yourself the mind goes places. Sorry.

But, still. Getting an orchi is fine, just go fucking get it done by a professional if you actually care about your body. You would be absolutely begging for trouble otherwise.

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>>8400965
>I wanna be beautiful like Lana

>>8402190
How the fuck did she nail the "middle aged jewess" look THAT HARD?

still blows my mind

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>Just take HRT and stay boymode.
How the fuck do I do this? Hard mode I like girls.

>>8402340
>Hard mode I like girls.
>Hard mode
kek

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>>8402360
Explain yourself this instant.

>>8402366
Boymode is only a thing for those who like girls.

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Are there people who realize later that they're Trans? Like they had no problem with their genitalia growing up, but then something happens that makes you realize you don't like it anymore? I've always had feelings of not liking my appearance, but this is different for me

>>8402449
Yes, AGPs.

>>8402456
>AGPs
what's that?

>>8402470
Autogynephiliacs. Your genital dysphoria is rooted in sexuality, not identity. It developed after your sexuality as a result.

>>8402490
Is that bad?

>>8402490
>>8402516
I'm sorry for asking dumb questions, I'd just like an answer for what's going on with me lately. I've been depressed over this for about a couple of months

>>8402516
>>8402519
No it's not bad. >>>/lgbt/agpg

okay so ive been talking with some people and they say that im definitely trans but im forcing myself to suck it up.
the thing is that i really want to be a girl but i dont have too much of a problem with my dick. at some days i feel some big discomfort when i have an erection but in general its just there and im like 'id rather have a vagina but i guess ill deal with this now'. also i never had sex + felt really manly so idk

>>8402637
Thank you

>>8402698
Try this:
>Open a word document
>Write every sign you remember about being trans in your life (this can take several days or even weeks to write as you remember more stuff)
>Write down why you think you're not trans
>Read it as impartially as possible and make a judgement about whether there is more evidence that you are trans or cis
>If you are still not sure, go to a therapist and show them what you wrote and make them judge it

>>8402718
Not them but I did this and I'm for sure trans just afraid of transitioning though

>>8402866
At least you know you're trans now. Once you're sure you just have to force yourself to come out to a therapist or go to informed consent.

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>>8402393
Well shit, guess I have to tell my boyfriend he's a girl.

So, how do I find someone to date who:
-Doesnt see me as a sexual curiosity
-Isn't a chaser
-Will love me during the rest of my transition

All that while being a MtF who hasnt socially transitioned yet...this shit makes me feel so bad

>>8402944
You don't have to exclusively like girls. It's when you don't like girls at all that you wouldn't boymode.

>>8403289
Pause your dating until after transition. It'll be stressful enough.

>>8403289
Bisexual dudes, simple as that. Don't go for "Gay"-identifying men or "Straight"-identifying men. Look for Bi dudes who are cool with being Bi.

I lucked out and found someone who fits the bill and he's been more supportive than I could have ever asked for throughout my transition. I'm going to be his wife one day.

You'll find them, they're out there.

>>8403289
Other trans people are most likely to fit those criteria. Bisexuals leaning towards women are perfect, since they'll still appreciate you as a woman physically and prefer you to be that way, but also not be intrinsically put off by your masculine characteristics.

From what I've heard dating sites are flooded with chasers. Actively looking for people is probably going to be hard, but there are people you can stumble upon. There are also hookup/matchmaking threads here occasionally, with people looking for long-term relationships.

>>8403376
>Bisexuals leaning towards women are perfect
Ding ding ding. That's the goldilocks zone of perfect guys for dating.

>>8403316
I always try to stick to this, because as you say it's just enough to have to deal with transition, and I'm not in a hurry as I'm just 18 with half a year of hormones, but there is always something in my head telling me to keep looking for someone, probably something like a lack of love

>>8403344
That's a little complicated since I like girls the most, there is just a few guys I would be with,
but I like your tips, I'll keep them.

>>8403376
Well a lot of people have told me that, being with other trans people is good, and thats what will probably happen in the future, but it's just a little difficult to find more of that people and that they get to like me, at least In a country like Spain, I could only wish to get out of here haha

>>8402449
Honestly i didn't even know what transgendered meant until i was 14, and i obviously could associate some memories as being trans but they could also be just judged as me being a child and children do some really dumb stuff, like i accidentally learned tucking and had show it to my mom or that i liked girls clothes because i wanted to be a princess but so did probably every child who watched Disney films.

>>8402157
1.2 Shoulder/Hip
11" Waist, 1'6" shoulders, 1'3" Hips.
I think my body might be able to pass, despite my 6' height. My butt is a square man-ish ass though, with blotchy skin. I need to fix that somehow! Then my face, its not square, at least there's that.. But I can not envision a female face at all yet.. Never tried makeup or anything to help really.

>>8403289
win the lottery

So when I go to schedule a meeting with a specialist so that I can start the road to transition, should I tell them about all of my weird shameful fetishist crossdressing exploits throughout my life (wanting to do ballet badly as a little boy, liked roleplaying and dolls, wearing mom's clothes and makeup, etc) and sexual problems as an adult (only attracted to men when imagine self as woman, asexual otherwise)?

Or should I just keep all of that nasty shit to myself and give them a more straightforward and basic reason why I think I might be transgender even though I'm a 6ft tall manly-man with a deep heterosexual cis sounding way of speaking?

>>8407742
>United States of Freemerica
Tell the truth. They have no real gatekeeping power, and can just help you identify any other weird brain problems you developed as a result of dysphoria. Which you almost definitely did, in case you didn't notice. If they do say no pills for you just threaten to self med without bloodwork and they usually have an obligation to comply if they're not private practice. Even then, just do informed consent. Any insurance that would cover psychiatric prescriptions covers it too.
>Soviet Republic of Eurostan
Lie your ass off. They basically own you and can put you on an import watchlist so you can't self med.

Fuck posted this in the wrong thread okay take 2.

Pre-hrt mtf for the record

Okay so after being a piece of shit for a year I have decided to hit the gym so that I don't die. My question is this: if I want a cute bod' which machines do I use and which not? I have basically been focusing on just cardio with the treadmill, but there are all these machines and I want to use them and I just have no idea what is what.

>>8407857
>>/fit/ Read the sticky.
Ask the gym trainers about the machines.

>>8407948
will read
It's just a uni' gym and during summer so I've seen like zero staff aside from the people that take my ID as I enter

>>8407783
>They basically own you and can put you on an import watchlist so you can't self med.
[citation needed]
why do you need to lie your ass of if you're american?

>>8407951
Try asking other people there? Or google?

>>8407857
machines are easy af, you literally can't do them wrong
they usually onoly activate one single group of muscles where as free weights can activate several groups at once which is why free weights give you a better workout in general

>>8407967
I don't know, people do pretty retarded shit on machines.

>>8407958
>>8407967
Sorry, I think I was too vague/misleading with my question, so that is my bad. I know how to use the machines at the gym (well, most of them. Some seem truly arcane), my knowledge gap is what ones I should, given the context of my situation, avoid and which ones I should use. I assume most leg machines are good, and I assume I avoid anything meant to build biceps, but I was wondering if anyone here had more specific insights.

>>8407982
no machines are technically bad, they give you a decent workout, just that using free weights and using them properly is always better

>>8407982
Honestly just read the sticky. You're not going to get musclebound anytime soon without concerted effort to achieve that and even then it takes months.

What >>8408030 says is right. Free weights are better. Just lurk on fit, read the sticky and build a plan from there when you're a bit better informed on how to go about achieving what you want.

>>8407742
Tell them all the trans stuff, but just leave out the sexual component. Some psychologists will be reasonable about it and actually try to help you, but others will use it as an excuse to invalidate you or otherwise make your assessment take forever. If you actually need to talk about it, do so with a separate therapist whom your access to HRT isn't controlled by.

Characterise it more as longing and need, with a comfort and sense of "rightness" when you satisfy it, but also the feeling that it's still inadequate (tying it back into the longing to actually be female rather than just do feminine things). It doesn't seem like any of your history counts as fetishistic though; what you've said sounds like the standard trans stuff.

Honestly, just self-medicate before you see them. If you already know you're trans then you don't need them to tell you that, and you don't want to delay getting HRT.

>>8407742
>>8408060
Oh, by "sexual component" I meant the "fetishistic" stuff. Only having a sexuality in the context of being a woman is fine (and makes perfect sense for an MtF), so long as you don't make it seem like being a woman turns you on in itself.

>>8408030
Right, but if I use a bicep machine on the daily I will eventually have larger biceps and from a mtf perspective that doesn't seem like the current goal, particularly pre-hrt.
I'm wondering about muscle groups essentially, and which ones it would be good to focus on with the context I've given in mind.
>>8408040
I am not sure that I am getting across my intent here. I don't want to be "musclebound", I just want to spice up my cardio-centric routine by focusing on muscles that, when worked on moderately, won't make me more obviously male. I understand the benefits of free weights over machines, as I read the little blog post that the sticky linked to. That said, I'm more comfortable with machines and, given my stated goal, isolation movements might even be a good idea.

>>8408081
you can train whatever you want, your muscles will lose density regardless when you go on HRT

>>8408086
I'm aware that there is muscle density loss, but I'm not sure of the extent. I take it it's quite large?
The timeline was also a concern given that the graph I've seen placed possible completion for that at around 2 years max which could be potentially annoying.

>>8408081
>I don't want to be "musclebound"
I understand that. I was trying to allay any concerns you might have had that it would happen if you used free weights or a more weights based exercise regimen.

>>8408108
Oh, that is my mistake; I see what you were saying now.

>>8408106
it's literally the difference between a cis man and a cis woman, so yes it's quite large
i lost 1.5" on my shoulder width because of muscle density losss alone and i wasn't exactly muscular, quite the opposite actually

>>8408145
This is very reassuring.

Thank you both for the advice.

>>8380312
tfw have to actually keep my glasses on to see

What's a good sites for mones ? That deliver to the uk/Scotland. Trans girl in need of mones can't wait for the nhs anymore going to end up killing myself

>in voice chat with friends
>one friend accidentally calls me a she
>don't even bother to correct him
>really feeling incredibly happy for some reason.

Anyone else here have an experience like that?

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Is taking HRT but not transitioning viable for transbians or do I just have to suck it up, be a man, and kill myself when I crack?
I can't imagine many women like femboys with ED.

>>8390917
One convincing post does not exist in a vacuum. Every culture in the world pretty much it's frowned on to be a tranny. Unless someone is seriously considering it themselves, posts arguing to transition are going to fall flat against the societal pressure not too.
Quit being obtuse.

>>8411865
Constatly. It's happened with my bandmates, with my hairdresser, and even with unknown people when I'm outside.
It feels really refreshing, especially given that I'm not on hrt yet :}

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I used to think non binary was a bunch of PC bullshit but considering I don't want to go full time mtf I think I might be. How can I know for sure?

>>8412844
You'll only be semi cute without hormones for a couple more years at best. If you take hormones, suck it up, you're a trans girl now. Unless you want to try the new femboy drugs, but they're experimental, expensive, and you probably won't get an endo to monitor your progress.

Asked over in /mtfg/, but might as well ask here too. Does anybody know anything about transitioning in the military? Planning to join after graduation, and I don't wanna transition until I'm not broke

>>8412942
Army can do it.
Navy basically says go to hell.
Coast Guard can do it if you're not onnaboat.
Not sure about chAir Force or Muhreens.

>>8412953
Army is the plan anyway. Is there any specific rulings to it? I've heard people say you have to wait a year after enlisting, but I don't know much else.

>>8412961
Waiting a year is so they don't just med disq you for brain problems, and isn't really a guarantee. It's more about making sure they've already blown enough money on training/housing/feeding you to marginalize your transition cost. Obviously you'll want to be a POG, never heard of anyone rucking with titty skittles. Afraid I don't know much else. I had the same plan as you but ended up being disqualified because of a blood problem.

>>8413028
>Obviously you'll want to be a POG

Why's that? The plan was to go in as a non combat MOS, probably paralegal.

>>8413045
Yeah... and you'd be a POG. Anyone who isn't a grunt is a POG, not just the people with the misfortune of interacting with grunts.

>>8413069
Oh, right. Had a bit of a brainfart there. Thanks for the info.

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I can't do it. I can't transition because I'll be a hon or a nonbinary or femboy with boobs or whatever the latest failed MtF meme is. I can't accept myself as a male either, I've tried but it falls apart in less than a day every time. The only way to stop the dread is to accept I have to transition. I just keep hopping back and forth to keep suicide at bay. It's not sustainable, each time my stint of acceptance and sanity grows shorter. Please help me. I can't do it.

>>8387601
the medical community is still unsure due to lack of testing, inconclusive and conflicting data.

as far as the medical community knows at this point, trans people can either be born trans, or made to be trans due to environmental factors.

>>8414461
I know how you feel and I have no clue how to help you or myself

Kinda embarrassing question, but does anybody find that the post-pee shake doesn't work anymore after going on HRT.I have no idea why or how this could happen, but every time I go pee it seems like there's nothing I can do to actually get all the pee out and no matter how much I shake a dozen seconds after my pants are back on some pee will dribble out onto my leg. It's so personally embarrassing and I hate it and I don't know how to stop it.

>>8414598
I'll get the useless post out of the way for you.
Works on my machine.

>>8414598
Push near your choad area when you're sitting down. You should sit down to pee.

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is 300mg of spiractin and 8mg of progynova too much?

>>8412708
Take bica, no ED

>>8389931
Bump

>>8414773
Can't you google stuff yourself?????
Honestly.
http://fortworth-transgender.org/home/supportgroups.php

>>8414792
I was looking for recommendations from people who actually know which ones are good and which ones are full of shitheads to avoid.

>>8414743
I do not down to pee, whenever I can. Push down where? I don't have a choad. I know you're just fucking with me but this is stressing me out. I know it's funny from the outside but I'm an adult and I I have to relearn how to pee...

>>8415645
*I do sit down to... Fucking autocorrect.

>>8414751
Depends on what your blood tests say?

>>8414751
for the average transperson, yeah.

Is 30 too old to transition?

>>8414751
blood test and check

>>8417805
well, it's better than starting at 40.

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im about to start taking hormones without really thinking about it very much because i dont care what happens in my life and no one can stop me hahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha idiots!

>>8420923
you are probably a genius
how I envy you

>>8420923
i did this and still dont regret anything 1 year later

>>8420932
i am the smartest nigger i know
>>8420993
t. me in 1 year

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>bumped my chest into a wall
>hormone tits are aching

this is a good feel.

>spend a year depressed and suicidal, avoiding asking myself the question of 'am i trans'
>finally force myself to think about it
>spend another six months or so """"questioning"""" because I'm too much of a pussy to accept it
>finally decide I just have to move forward assuming I am because as long as I leave an out in the form of "I'm just questioning" I'll never do anything about it
>spend another six months coming up with reasons why I can't yet transition
>finally force myself to call local tranny clinic
>appointment for informed consent in July
>losing weight and getting in shape, taking better care of my skin/hair, paying attention to how I dress and carry myself and all that
>realize I actually look pretty good for a guy
>still don't want to be a man but the man in the mirror is starting to look pretty decent
I really wish this didn't make me doubt myself as much as it did
Does the doubt ever go away?
Do you ever start to feel like you're 'trans enough' or that you deserve to transition?

>>8423845
No one is ever completely sure about anything. But if it's something you've been thinking about a ton, you should probably just do it. Also, there's not much risk involved in just trying hormones for a couple months and seeing how you feel. Keep a journal to record your thoughts as you take it to refer back to if you're feeling unsure.

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>>8421010
You are. Never change.

I don't really browse this board much, so I don't know your terms very well and I wanted to know if I am an "AGP" or "transtrender" or anything like that. I think the male form looks really dumb, and I don't like how I look because of it. Figured I'd take hormones to get a little bit closer to something I like. I think I must have a lot of issues with it, because I think about it a lot when I'm just walking around. Is this AGP? More information: I don't want to get surgery or anything, as I'm okay having a penis, though I wouldn't mind maybe some cosmetic facial stuff done. I talked to a therapist about it, and she said I could refer any doctor to her if I decided to get on HRT and she'd tell them to do it, but she also said that I wasn't saying the typical things that her trans patients say (which I knew I wasn't; I didn't want to lie to get her to do the thing because I wanted her to know the actual reasons behind it).
So, what is this? If it's AGP then what should I do?
I can give more information if necessary; I am considering contacting a doctor very soon since I want to stop and hopefully reverse a little of the damage that testosterone has done but I figure I should challenge the notion before I do since it's a big decision.

>>8424139
AGP is this board's hottest meme. Anyway,

>I think the male form looks really dumb, and I don't like how I look because of it
> Figured I'd take hormones to get a little bit closer to something I like
>I think about it a lot when I'm just walking around
> I wouldn't mind maybe some cosmetic facial stuff done
>I want to stop and hopefully reverse a little of the damage that testosterone has done

Who are you trying to convince anon? Those are some pretty heavy trans indicators. speak to a gender therapist.

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Hi Trans Help General, I was advised to head over here from the agp general, I'm hoping thats alright.

I hope it's alright if I just quote the posts instead of re-typing everything. Any advice I would appreciate!

>>8425363
>>8425402

How helpful are therapists with questioning?

Ah fuck I dunno what to do. I was about to get on student insurance (AETNA) to finally be off my parent's plan (CIGNA) because I was uncomfortable going for HRT under their insurance because they'd be asking me questions and shit probably like "why are you using our insurance what are these bills for" or something and I want to sneak that shit tell literally nobody, but now outta nowhere my dad's like "yo I just realized I can't even take you off my plan until like the spring or something so why don't you just wait until then" and there is 0 chance I am waiting another half a year minimum before doing this shit I have to salvage what I got and quick so what the fuck.
Do I stay on CIGNA and just not tell them what I'm using their shit for (I assume that they can't just ask the insurance company because it's my private info) or do I waste a bunch of money and have two health care plans at once so that I can deal with AETNA which would be completely removed from my parents? If I do the former that would also be tough because then I'd probably need to switch docs when I switch to AETNA, unless they did both. I kind of wanted to use my university health services for this since I live in fuckin country town and I'm afraid a doctor might spit on me if I suggest the idea whereas I assume the university will be a bit nicer. Speaking of University, if I do this will they try to change shit like my pronouns on webpages or whatever? I don't want them to do that.
Also, anyone know much about either of these insurance companies with respect to this stuff? I was trying to compare them but I'm really busy and it's a little confusing trying to read their stuff.
>>8427950
My experience was sort of poor, though obviously it's just one experience. I just wish she had offered more feedback, but it was a whole lot of just me talking, which I get is kind of the point, but I'm not really sure what we accomplished other than she'll give me a letter to give to a doctor.

>>8428709
Also I found a resource for trans people in my state and like all the doctors that are supposedly cool are far as fuck (except for like one that has a weird spiritual health clinic and listsn nothing about insurance they take) how often do I need to visit doctors to do this thing?

hey my chest is growing too fast for me to be ok with

i've been taking hormones for around a year but my school is awful for trans

whats that thing femboys take to keep their chest flat?

>>8414598
Not on HRT, but fwiw I've always had to wipe a lot after peeing, along with squeezing to get the last few drops of urine out. Only when there's nothing left to squeeze onto the paper can I safely put my pants on. idk why, it sucks but there's nothing I can do about it.

im so fuckivn drubk its like 930 am lmeo

pleeas freee spiro
>spiro the dragpn

>>8430557
>tfw used to be an alcoholic
i know damn well you can type like a normal person when drunk

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>tfw Came out to friends and family as trans at 24 after years of repression alcoholism and drug abuse

>tfw therapist convinced me I wasnt trans and decided not to transition

>more drug abuse and repression

>tfw started hormones at 28 and regret my whole life up until this point

Tbh I'm really happy now that I've started as its better late than never. It really has allieved a lot of my anxieties about being male but I've probably screwed myself as far as my physical features go

>>8430919
How did he convince you you weren't trans? I've been thinking of starting at 24 because I'm basically just drinking myself to death as is.

>>8430919
Oh hey, this sounds like me, except I'm 24 now. If all works out I'll be on hrt before 25, I hope.

>>8430936
>>8431086
Yes definitely don't hesitate if you feel strongly about it!

My therapist was working with a few trans patients at the time and she would tell me things like I didnt seem as feminine as them and that it was odd that i dressed as a male and said i felt female. I dont think she knew a goddamn thing about being trans in hindsight

>>8431182
why would she know anything about trans?
it isn't like she specializes in trans issues or has a load of trans clients.
she's just a person.
she's probably only ever even read a few paragraphs about trans issues and that was 20 years ago in graduate school.
give her a break.
you're going to need to educate her.

>>8431242
its not my job to educate others. this is america, education is not a right. it is personal responsibility to be educated, however u find knowledge.
parents r rrsponsible to teach their kids, not the states job. and professionals like hackers or therapists who suck at their job, its their own fault for being inept

>>8431252
maybe you were sent to her to help her learn.
you educating her could ultimately help hundreds of her future trans patients.

but you're right, it is easier to just do nothing except bitch about her.

>>8431269
Chill. The poster said it was like 4 years ago and that they were convinced by her at the time. We don't even know if they're still seeing her.

>>8431359
>it was like 4 years ago

and yet she is still whinging about it, milking it for attention

>>8431460
Are you fucking retarded or something? She was telling her story.

>>8431460
You seem to be overly critical of this poster and I don't understand why.

>>8431269
allah would have willed it

>>8431481
Are you fucking new or something? She tells that story every day.

>>8431522
Where nigger?

>>8431533
>white-knighting this hard
>calling people nigger

kek
it's like there's a tornado in your brain!

>>8431567
Wow a tornado. Jesus Christ you autistic faggot I've never once seen that person that you say they is here all the time and I'm here every single day. I swear day of the rope can't come soon enough for you.

>>8431667
>I'm here every single day

NEET pls go
>>>/pol/

>>8431252
Yeah this particular therapist I chose because she listed on her web page she specualizes in LGBT issues so

>>8431712
You're a fucking autistic retard. That person has never been here and you're over hear saying they when all the time. You deserve to be hung you disgusting freak.

>>8431712
>on 4chan
>not expecting NEETs

Back to reddddit dud3br0

>>8431522
>spending enough time on 4chan to know what stories are told every day.

And no I rarely ever even post here. I have a therapist now who is educated in trans issues and she has helped me loads thank you

>>8431822
>I rarely ever even post here

Make it never instead of rarely.

>>8431851
Oooooo youre so clever

>>8431851
Kill yourself you fucking freak. Disgusting unlovable tranny. I bet you come to bully other trannies because your transition went so horribly. At least you will be dead in a few years you freak.

>>8431822
your welcome

>>8431800
>she specualizes in LGBT issues so

so she's a dyke

This escalated really quickly.

How do I get over my crippling depression because nobody accepts me at all or even uses the right pronouns except my therapist

>>8432003
interesting hobbies
daily walks
service (giving back) to others
meditation
healthy diet
delete social media

>>8432003
tell them theyrr causing your depression with theirbhelicopter parenting assults

if they smile, change your phone number and address

>>8428709
if your new insurance will cover u now, go for it.
your father is talking about how moat insurance companies have a monopoly that only allows joining/quitting at a preselected time once a year.

do not wait. start hrt asap. never delay. theyre tricking u.
>>8429534
>cant read hrt general
>>8430529
google will answer u. its no pig deal if u do a second shake.
>>8431800
if shes a dyke she will hon you. no guarentee she will write ur srs letter.
>>8432018
your an asshole. those r external things. she is having internal trauma because her (((friends))) are causing internalized violence toward her

>>8430919
This is an interesting comment chain. Anyways that's good that you're happier now.

>>8432065
>my an asshole

you're wrong
she needs to take responsibility for her feelings.
she decides how to feel.
her "friends" are not responsible for her feelings.
and if they are "making her feel" that way then maybe they aren't really her "friends" and she should stop hanging out with them.
grow up.
you can't just blame everything on everyone else and sit at home crying for sympathy on the internet.
and as for calling me an asshole when you don't even know me: fuck you. you're the asshole, you stupid brain-dead cunt.
(how does it feel to be snapped at?)

>>8432156
Dammmmmn
Preach

>>8429534
wear baggy shit

>>8389895
You still here?
Sports bras + layered and loose clothes work wonders if you don't have very large breasts
For haircuts try that medium messy thing like maxmoefoe or young bieber, I don't know how it's called, it'll make you look like a kid but hides your gender
Short haircuts don't really work unless you're already masculine, it doesn't matter what style you get, you can look masc in a pixie cut if you have a masculine face
If you want to hide your gender and you don't already look androgynous you need to hide your face really, it's the same as for MtFs except you want to avoid explicitly female ones like tranny bangs, the shorter you get the more you look like your birth sex and the more it obscures your face the more androgynous you look

>>8432065
Yeah, the new insurance will cover it, but I think the old one would have, too. I just didn't want to do it because it's my parents plan. I just checked and it looks like it would be an extra 2k a year to be on both at the same time, so fuck. I guess I am just going to stay on my parents plan and do it, though now I need to figure out whether or not they can see what the insurance is going to.

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>>8432065
If I understand correctly the state I live in doesnt require a letter for srs. Just a few prerequisites like living as your preferred gender for 2 years. Also my health insurance covers it.
>>8432078
Thank you! I honestly feel bad for whoever that person is it seems like they're troubled

How long does it take for my brain to update my self image? I totally look like a girl but my mind is playing tricks with me when i think of myself.

I contacted an LGBT group in my area about recommendations for doctors and they referred me to a clinic that seems a bit new-agey for my taste. Would it be a problem if I went to them for the HRT but then had a regular doc' for everything else like physicals and stuff? I don't really know if that would be hard to do or either of them would dislike that I'm doing that.

>>8411865
Yes my mom actually did this.

Do I need a debit card to buy from QHI? Bank account? Both? I'm from US.

My countrys health care doesn't monitor T and E levels at all, and I haven't had enough money to go to a provate clinic to test my levels in almost a year of HRT. If my levels are shit, is my transition fucked? Did I waste a year of my transition and I'm left with just one year of effective HRT or will the pills still do work in the next 2 years and I just stalled the effects?

>>8440083
If your levels aren't right, feminization just goes a lot slower.

I'm 6'2 and 145lb with an angular jaw and a pretty deep voice.

I've been considering transitioning for a few years now on account of really bad AGP and I've never really felt "right" as a boy.

Until recently I'd always sort of thought that because of my dimensions / characteristics I'd never actually pass and would end up looking like some demented goblin even with surgery & HRT

But it's getting bad now and I'm 21 so I feel like if I do transition it has to be now or never.

Is it possible in your opinion for me to pass at 6'2? I've heard of some people shrinking up to a couple of inches on estrogen but even then I'd still be 6'0 and the 95th percentile for women is 5'8, 4 inches further below that.

I just want to be a cute girl :(

>>8444001
>Is it possible for me to pass at 6'2?

Pass as what?
A woman?
It depends on a lot more factors than your height.
Yes, there are some women who are that tall.
Does their height draw attention to them?
Yes.
That doesn't mean you shouldn't try to transition.
The point of transitioning is not to "pass" it is to bring your exterior more in life with your interior.
If you see yourself as a petite princess then you may never realistically attain that.
But if you see yourself as a tall woman with an angular jaw and a deep voice, then, yes, you can probably attain that.
The key is in managing your expectations and having realistic goals.
Can you become shorter?
Probably not.
Can you become more feminine looking?
Probably.

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is this a trick question?
are they going to fuck me if i answer honestly?

>>8443541
So it's just slowed down but not lost for ever? That's a good thing then

>>8445630
>answering honestly to anything
Real women use lies and deceit to get what they want, hon

>>8425452
>tfw this person is probably already gone so they can't be helped

>can't come out to anyone because no one I know will accept or tolerate it
>no money or skills to move elsewhere and start the transition
>nearly 23, so remaining chance to pass becomes lower and lower every day
How do I make repressing more bearable?

I've heard some people say things like they aren't sure if they're gay (bi) or just really lonely. Do you guys think it's possible to be not sure if you're trans or just really depressed?

>>8446745
I'm almost in the same situation. I'm getting to the point where I think I will just come out to my parents though. I mean worst they can do is throw me out and fuck it I want to die anyways.

Why does being trans have to be so hard? getting on hormones is really hard, I have to fight my gatekeepers to convince them I'm actually transgender, self-medding is expensive and unsafe, and I've lost all motivation to do anything while my body slowly turns more masculine. Sigh. Couldn't I have just been born female.

>>8438346
Tbh sometimes it just gets stuck, i'm 27 and i'm only now starting to lose the self image i had in high school and i'm still in a closet, no hrt just natural changes, I still see myself in my old haircut if I have to picture myself etc.

Regular memory might play a role, I always avoided the fuck out of pics and windows and I only recently stopped doing so

>>8447379
Yeah it's a common sentiment
It's kinda hard to judge anything with depression since it numbs your feelings and stuff

>>8447864
That makes sense.
oh well what can ya do maybe the hrt will help me feel emotions again

If I want to run away from home to be a trans in peace, where I have to go?

>>8448066
lgbt shelter

>>8377657
MtF

How should I start my transition? I'm already out to everyone that matters except for my mother, but that will come with due time.
How do I get on HRT? I want to be treated professionally, not self medicated. I'm assuming that I need a therapist, but I don't know how to get one.

I know this is one of the most basic things, but I am very shy and don't know where to start.

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so im 19, probably closeted ftm, pretty bad hairloss.
>pic related
trying not to wash my hair too often, doing it twice a week atm (fixed days, monday and thursday)
what can i do or is it all lost? when i drive my hand through my hair some always come out, its been getting alot worse over the last years... i acutally dont know if its too visible there but holy fuck its pretty bad. the only time you cant directly watch on my scalp is when i freshly washed it, every day after that its visible and it makes me wanna kms cause that wont help with passing at some point female.

>inb4 use wigs forever

>>8451321
but ftm or mtf

>>8451327
yeh i fucked up, >>8451321 NOT ftm BUT mtf

>>8377657
I keep on putting off coming out to my parents how do I just do it and get it over with? The sooner I do it the better. I've been trying to do it for months and it's really bothering me now.

>>8450708
Maybe you should tell us where you are from because procedures vary by country

>tfw 6'1" with 18" shoulders
Is there any hope for me lads?

>>8453259
yes
depends on hips etc

>>8451344
send them a message that you want to talk tonight.

I'm 25 MtF, never told anyone, not even remotely hinted something along those lines, and even though I am quite effeminate nobody close to me ever questioned my sexuality. How do I start HRT? Do I need to see a therapist or something, also I got a lot of chest hair and even back hair, will hormones take care of that or do I have to laser it, also my voice is very deep, other than that and being 6' I already get remarks how I look like a girl very often because of my figure, face and hair. How should I proceed, how can I fix my voice?

Is it normal that I keep thinking about killing myself because I will never be a girl? And how do I get rid of these thoughts? Not even memeing at this point.

>>8458393
I don't know if it's normal but I get this too. I have no clue how to stop the thoughts though.

>>8458398
I was feeling so hopeless. Starting transition seems too hard. I'm trying but in my country I get blocked every step of the way. And I don't even know if I will pass. Suicide seems like such an easy solution.

>>8458411
It's always worth it to try before you decide to kill yourself. Things can get better if you try but they can't get better if you're dead. Can you try to self med?

>>8458431
Maybe I'll do that. It might be the only way to transition for me.
I just wish being trans weren't so damn hard. It's like everyone in the world hates us and wants to make our lives as hard as possible.

>>8458336
>how do I start hrt
Go to QHI, buy cyproterone and estrofem/progynova and take 50mg cypro and 4mg estrogen daily
that'll get you started, just adjust dosages once you learn more
It's ez pz

HRT won't take care of your hair, it will just make it grow slower and thinner

To fix voice you need to do mtf voice training, just look it up
You could also get surgery for it, but you should do that after voice training if your voice still sucks

>>8392672
I'm too scared to do anything else but repress and waste my life away until I kill myself or die

>>8459057
What do you have to lose?

>>8459130
A little bit of dignity? I don't really have much to begin with I'm pretty much a huge loser but actually doing something would just be confirming. What parents wouldn't be disappointed in a son turning out like that and I'm pretty sure my parents aren't the kind to get excited because their kid is lgbt.

I'm also really really afraid of being judged and I know I will be. To disappear would be my biggest wish.

>>8459201
I actually know exactly how you feel. Literally everything from imagining my death to my parents being disappointed to wanting to just disappear.

>>8459523
Are you taking steps to just trying to ignore it or deal with it?

>>8459201
its like I wrote this myslef, fuck
I want to disappear (and thats pretty much what Ive been doing just hiding in my appartment)


I cant accept being trans cause that would mean I have to transition or feel even worse, better get back to convincing myself that Im just a fetishist and man up

>>8459551
I'm 23 almost 24 now I'm just trying to ignore it. I don't even know what to do at this point. It's a fucked if I do fucked if I don't situation.

>>8459616
Do you have any success or anything in life?

So I found out recently I have a few early signs of MPB. HRT reverses the effects of this right? I was really trying to repress but if I'm going bald I think I might just have to transition.

>>8462253
If it's recent you may reverse it with HRT, and almost certainly at least stop it.

>>8462260
It's not bad yet, but I noticed a slightly receding hairline and my hair started falling out a lot more in the past 6 months or so.

>>8462253
MPB was basically the final straw that made me transition. I guess it's like that for others too.

i have my first appointment with a therapist tomorrow (required here in order to get hormones&co), i'm mtf and i'm kinda scared. any advice on what to do tomorrow and tell her (or what not to tell her)?

>>8462374
Tell her the truth, she will most likely ask about your childhood and if you already present partly as female. I wouldn't mention you being trans in connection with fetishism

>>8462374
don't mention suicidal thoughts

>>8462253
>>8462290
It depends a lot on which medications you take as well, Bica is your best bet since it blocks DHT.

>>8465715
I'm kinda in the same situation with MPB just now starting. So does every AA help with MPB? I literally started this month on spiro and I'm kinda curious if I should switch to bica now.

>>8465740
All of them are going to help, since most DHT is made from excess T in the body. I'd suggest Bica in general anyway over Spiro and Cypro, not a steroid+not a diuretic, but what works for you works for you.

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>>8377657
Please I need to know how it's possible to buy ketamine or some other substance they use for euthenesia with pets. It has to be painless.

Are there any noncontrolled euthenesia meds? Are there any good resources on this?

>>8466379
Buy a firearm, a high powered round to the back of the throat will destroy your brain stem and put you unconscious immediately.

>>8466379
thats not what they use for euthanasia dumbass, they use some shit like potassium and some other heavy stuff but not ketamine i don't think

>>8466772
That's for the bad ways of dying. They use ketamine related for the better.
>>8466728
And if it fails it leads to hideous deformity. No guns

>>8467521
If you shoot your brain stem, there's no failure. You die instantly. Same as hanging from the long drop.

>>8467540
Or you just destroy your vision center instead . There are many case studies where people failed this method

>>8467575
Your vision center isn't in your brain stem though, those are cases where the person attempting suicide has shot straight up into the brain from the roof of the mouth, not the back of the throat.

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>doctors appointment tomorrow
>made it to get a physical but am going to ask him about HRT at the end
>about to talk to a human being about being trans in real life
aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA

>>8469377
>about to talk to a human being about being trans in real life
Good luck I can't do it

I'm a male student, 19 years old, and feeling like I may be trans.
I have always liked shemale porn and always pictured myself looking like them though I have never cross dressed. I have a girlfriend whom I love and would accept me and try and stay with me as she is very, though I suspect it would tear her apart as she is not into shemales (I would want to keep it). My friends and parents would likely accept me too, but I just imagine every social situation for the next 5 years being centered around a massive elephant in the room.

What do you think I should do? I don't think I want to lose every relationship I have in order to look how I may feel.

>>8470366
>I have always liked shemale porn
NOT TRANS

>>8470366
**Edit** Fucking Typos

>>8470371
That is just what Im into.
I just don't feel like a man

>>8470366
>and always pictured myself looking like them
This is AGP. See >>8384843

>>8470386
It's not simply arousal tho. I don't just feel dysphoria when I am jacking off, it was just my first experiences of noticing passable people. I could be being a total moron, I have never talked to anyone about this stuff. It certainly isn't just a kink to me though at times I think I told myself it was.

>>8470408
AGP is much more than just arousal.

>>8470445
But it's based on the sexual gratification of thinking of myself as a women, correct? I am trying to get what it is by reading the thread. In that case I am certainly AGP, but I also feel like a girl in all other non-sexual situations.

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oops. wrong file, I meant this.

anyone know of this persons channel?

>>8470456
It can be sexual or emotional gratification. A lot of trans girls think they aren't because they don't notice the sexual side yet they describe the emotional side very well. It's a kind of comforting feeling for many.

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>>8470591
I receive both sexual and emotional gratification. I just don't know what to do. 4chan seems to be the best place for me to go for dialogue on such things.
How would I go about working up courage to tell my GF and how would I even do that? Should I start on hormones and change myself before coming out?
I'm just really confused about it all. Over the last couple of weeks I have realized how long I have been entirely in the dark and confused about these feelings. My sisters lesbian and my family is ultra liberal. I just can't imagine ever wanting to draw attention to myself. I'm a cynical introvert.

>>8470636
Ask in /agpg/.

>>8470445
Not the guy but you people are fucking confusing with this shit.
I semi-relate to what the guy said, but at the same time I've always been told here that I'm "definitely trans" and should just transition already when I explained my mindset.
And then you're like "AGP is much more than just arousal" but I go to the fucking thread you link and it's like "Autogynephilia, from Greek αὐτό- ("self"), γυνή ("woman") and φιλία ("love"). Broadly, arousal to the thought of being a woman. It can take many forms - being aroused at imagining or seeing yourself with a female body, dressing in clothes that make you appear feminine, acting in stereotypical "feminine" ways, or others." like what the fuck DEFINE YOUR TERMS WHAT DOES THIS SHIT EVEN MEAN SHOULD I TAKE HORMONES OR NOT WHY THIS ARCANE ILL-DEFINED ACRONYM BULLSHIT FUCK FUCK FUCK

How discrete is the packaging from hormones ordered online? I live with my family and they wouldn't be accepting of me if I came out as trans.

>>8471281
>I semi-relate to what the guy said, but at the same time I've always been told here that I'm "definitely trans"
Firstly those don't contradict, secondly posters here who don't understand AGP are extremely bad at telling how trans someone is because of that.

>And then you're like "AGP is much more than just arousal" but I go to the fucking thread you link
Compare autogynephilia and gynephilia (being a lesbian or straight man). If a man says he's straight, you know that's more than just arousal, don't you?

>SHOULD I TAKE HORMONES OR NOT
Being or not being AGP doesn't mean you should or shouldn't. The decision to do HRT is a matter of your judgement, not a diagnosis. Learn about things like your AGP to inform your choice.

>>8471466
just says prescription medicine on it i believe.

I'm coming out to my GP tomorrow anons, then probably my parents a couple of days later.

Any tips?

>>8473055
Don't get your hopes up about your parents. Expect the absolute worst.

>>8473063
They're both massive lefties I'm thinking it'll be fine.

Mum ( AU here ) has always said "I can't wait till you meet a nice girl or boy anon" so they'd obviously be okay with me being gay.

I think they'd be okay with me being trans.

I hope so :(

>>8473080
my dad is a retarded leftoid who hates trump and still called my 'psychotic' and banned me from using the internet when I came out.

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>tfw 6'4"
>tfw same EXACT face as
>tfw idgaf about passing because I wanna join the military

if ya'll see some roided out hon on the news it's me, i'm pecked the fuck out with a feminine face. I got called godzilla in middle school. I'm just gonna try to find peace with being a hon, by using my huge build to get a job in law enforcement

>>8478746
dude, law enforcement and military are completely terrible for your self-esteem

you will be ground down by your superiors and made to carry out orders that go against what you believe is right

consider another career path, maybe computer programming?

>>8478746
So...your plan is to take steroids AND female hormones?

>>8453259
tfw 5'11 with 20" shoulders
tfw pushed so hard with trying to be masculine i don't think there's any way i could have a successful transition, turning 21 in 2 months, i feel like it's now or never and it's giving me really bad anxiety, i don't want it to stay with me and i end up transitioning into a were-hon at 35

>>8478783
No.
I was born with a very "roided" body type. Large muscles/shoulders/and chalfs so big my gtm teacher called them cows. I'm just born freakish

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>>8478757
Actually I love violence when permitted.
I love someone presenting me a situation I "get" to solve with violent action. I've seen the military and the people that come out of it and they all say just to shut up and do it. I would love to take that simplistic approach to life, and let someone else take the wheel. Also I thrive under strict structure. To the point where i'm going to job corps to test out barracks life. I also graduated from Clackamas Academy of Industrial Sciences (CAIS) so I know they'll make way, especially with great health,perfect vision, etc.

Thank you for warning me, but i've had family friends consult me and making it to officer and blindly following superiors are both in my future.

Pick related, Holding everyone up

next thread:

>>8480444
>>8480444
>>8480444