Casual Sex

You're right. It is just masturbation.

After 3 years of not feeling regrets or guilt you've still never had sex with someone you were in a relationship with.

If you're curious where the "cold", unfulfillment perspectives come from... just wait till you get a bit older.

>>8341969
Why do you think I also don't value a relationship?

I've had sex with people I had feelings for. It's obviously better. But steak is better than hamburgers and I still eat hamburgers.

>>8341946
>it's just masturbation
Exactly. That is why I don't do hookups. If I just need to nut I will take care of it myself. I want romance and commitment.
The men that I have met that fo hookups all seem detached from others. What will they fo when they lose their looks and hookups get harder and harder to come by?

>>8341978
Most people I know hookup in between relationships, not in lieu of relationship.

And masturbation with someone else feels better than doing it by yourself.

Casual hookups are ruining society.

They are responsible for the AIDS epidemic and Syph still being relevant.

If you hookup on a regular basis, you have no desire to improve yourself. You are destroying the gay community's reputation, what little of it is left, and contributing to the degradation of individual improvement which is the crux of society.

>>8342012
The guys I have met that do hookups,only do hookups.

Raw mechanical sex does not appeal to me at all.

>OP asks if people like hooking up
>Every response is someone telling him how he's a bad person

I've never seen a better example of /lgbt/s hugbox. Better you just stay away, OP.

>>8342030
t. Virgin

>>8342045
hahahahahaahahah

I've probably had more sex than you have

When I talk about hookups ruining society, Im not just tossing my opinion in from the sidelines.

Im speaking from experience.

>>8342030
this desU

>>8342058
Is believing that where you choose to stick your dick affects the whole of society a symptom of narcissism, a schizophrenic god delusion, or is it just plain overblown egotism?

>>8342084
He had a bad time and thinks everyone else is him, so at least some of those.

>>8342032
Idk why it has to be "mechanical" because it's not someone you know.

I've had extremely passionate one night stands before.

>>8342181
Probably due to difference in personality. I tried hookups but only once actually met the guy. He was rude and demanded bareback so I left. The ones I spoke with wanted to top me, get off and kick me out.

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>>8341946
For me as long as it's safe and the other person is up-front about the whole thing it's not really a cold hookup. But it does get tiring when one person just keeps coming on and doesn't pull through only to ask why I don't reply to them anymore, and then suddenly blowup at me when I tell them that they're just wasting my time. I do have regulars but the hookup thing has just become a game for a lot of weirdos and i'm not interested in that.

From my experience, it's never just casual and no strings. I haven't done a lot of hooking up lately, as going back to school has eaten my time. However, whenever I would go hook up it always went to "Hey, would you want to come back over sometime?" or "Can we go out to eat some day?", etc.

Most guys can't decouple sex and emotional attachment. But that could just be the area I'm in or the guys I've hooked up with. I don't have enough of a sample size.

>>8342042
> t. a bitter faggot who browses /lgbt/ whilst complaining about /lgbt/

>>8342269
Is it really so crazy for someone to want an /lgbt/ that's not 90% trannies and the remaining 10% are self-hating gays?

>>8342262
I wonder if I'm ugly and/or bad in bed. I usually just have one encounter with people attractive enough I'd be interested in a second one.

The less cute ones are definitely like you say, though.

op post has words curious, regret, and guilty.

too many buzzwords in op post. obvious shill

stop shilling vice, losers. shill a cooking/sowing thread

>>8342317
>The mad ramblings of a crazy person

>>8341946
Eh. Grindr just wasn't my thing. Could never truly trust people out there. Especially the ones who act like sluts right off the bat.

>>8342305
It could just be the guys you've hooked up with. But yeah, the less cute guys are always a little more clingy.

I think for me it's because I'm a complete bottom in an area where there's a lot of tops or "vers" tops. Bottoms just seem to be in high demand here. Almost all the guys I've hooked up with or dated admit to not being able to get dates or hook ups very often and turning to being vers just to get some sex when they're having a dry streak. Meanwhile, I often have to pick between guys when I go looking for hook ups. It's just market pressures and stuff. If my area was more balanced, I'd probably be middling on getting hook ups.

>>8342030
bi guy here. they're also ruining heterosexual dating life. no man wants to get in a relationship because most women are either sleeping around too much to bother dating, or have fucked so many people that they got bored of it. i don't want to share a partner with other people, and i don't want a partner that had been passed around so often for so long that sex has become bland and monotonous. if the people you predominantly have sex with are basically strangers that mean nothing to you, i'm pretty much immediately turned off.
but, i've kinda become a hypocrite because of this. i keep finding people who are/were super slutty and end up leaving them shortly thereafter, so i kinda feel like i'm not much better even tho i'm trying to be

>>8342367
I won't claim to be perfect on this; I've hooked up with more guys than I'd care to admit. I got Gonorrhea twice. One guy told me he tested positive for HIV shortly after we hooked up. I used a condom with him, but I got some of his blood on my hand and flipped the fuck out about that, because who wouldn't?

The only reason to hookup rather than getting yourself off is out of a desire for human contact. Its natural to want that, but hookups are not a long term solution. They are a crutch, a temporary relief, an infinite cycle of risk and an inability to confront yourself.

I'm not completely /pol/ about judging people for past hookups. If someone wants to change, then that is fantastic. People often don't change though.

>>8341946
I think the only people who get much out of it are the cute/hot guys. If you're just kind of average or have flaws it's a fucking roller coaster ride filled with uncertainty and frustration.
Also I've noticed that the Grindr threads have all but disappeared over the years, they used to be quite common. Is it just that the novelty wore off, or are less people hooking up?

>>8342356
Actually now that I think of it, there are some attractive tops that message me about how much they need my hole, but I'm just not interested in getting fucked that often.

>>8342420
>an inability to confront yourself.
I work full time and don't feel like spending lots of my free time dating people and starting relationships.

There, self confronted.

>>8342553
Grindr is just as popular as ever. I think the trannies and gaygen have just scared off all the normies.

>>8341946
worthless and reprehensible, this kind of thing is okay for some people, but for me, I hate this kind of thing.

>>8341946

Pros:
>

Cons:
> Degrades monogamy
> Deters commitment
> Promotes cheating
> Spreads STIs/STDs, and HIV
> Encourages perversion
> Lax security and privacy
> Potential for blackmail
> Evidences poor grammar, use of punctuation, and spelling
> Reinforces GBT+ stereotypes
> Supportive users of the app are in denial of its cons
> Grindr profits from all of the above

>>8342574
I know that feeling. It's tiring and eventually you just want to not be going out every night. It was neat when I was starving in my early college days and could basically trade a handjob or blowjob if they can prove they're clean for a meal and a movie at their place before going back to homework. But now that I'm getting ready to graduate and am working alongside going to school, I'm feeling more and more down for a committed relationship where we can work things out together at our own pace rather than "Hi, nice to meet you, gonna put it in, now".

>>8342658
>Degrades monogamy
How?
>Deters commitment
How?
>Promotes cheating
How?
>Spreads STIs/STDs, and HIV
True. Though most STDs aren't a big deal and safe sex prevents nearly all HIV risk
>Encourages perversion
Wtf does perversion mean, and I think you're confusing hooking up with watching porn.
>Lax security and privacy
What?
>Potential for blackmail
Revenge porn is far more likely to happen after a committed relationship.
>Evidences poor grammar, use of punctuation, and spelling
Oh, starting to realize you're shitposting.
>Reinforces GBT+ stereotypes
And yet acceptance only continues to grow.
>Supportive users of the app are in denial of its cons
Lol.
>Grindr profits from all of the above
Capitalism is bad?

>>8342731
Oh, I just meant that I don't actually like getting fucked frequently. Im far more interested in oral.

Honestly all I want is a cute roommate who i have sex with. Ive felt infatuation before. It was fine, but I know that feeling fades after a while. I'd be more than happy to jump right passed the honeymoon phase and just to the point where we're best friends cohabitating and fucking.

>>8342760
I can understand that. Getting fucked takes a lot of prep and -- to be quite honest -- most guys have no fucking clue how to do it right. Oral's really fun to give and can be spontaneous.

That sounds pretty nice, actually. Though I know I'd probably get a ton of feelings and stuff if I was doing stuff like hanging out and doing sexual stuff regularly.
>TFW your flatmates are all really straight

>>8342852
Oh, feelings are allowed. But you'd have already set up that relationship so when the passion starts to fade down the line you're still just sexual best friends.

And it could be worse. I had a bicurious roommate who was super cute and legitimately wanted me to blow him, but he had a girlfriend and she wouldn't let him experiment. Our relationship is still kinda weird where every time we hang out and drink we end up cuddling on the couch.

That's how i know I'd like that setup. Just a guy like him, who is also gay, and we're both into each other.

>>8341946
Wish I was getting some.

>>8341946
I've done it a few times but I didn't really like it.
I'm not a hugely sexual person, even during puberty I barely ever fapped. I mostly enjoy cuddling. Plus if I do have sex I have a hard time cumming so I prefer longer encounters, which is impossible to get with casual sex, even with dating it's difficult to find guys really into long, passionate sex. Most guys usually just go for the quick 5-15min sex sprints and don't really like cuddling or anything, especially if it's casual sex.

Plus I've even had guys say stuff like "no kissing, no cuddling, no eye contact" etc. cause they don't want it to be "too gay." Overall casual sex is just kind of annoying and leaves you maybe like a 1/3rd satisfied assuming it's in the top-tier of casual sex. I guess that's why people addicted to casual sex keep having it since it's never actually very good in the end so you're never satisfied lol

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>tfw only find old fat dudes or weird Hispanic guys on Grindr
>tfw never found a qt twink of Grindr
>tfw have never had homosex

>>8342742

Promotes polygamy.
Easier access to hookups means people will cheat, thus also deterring commitment.
Wrong. STDs are a big deal.
Perversion, i.e. fisting, shitting on chests, unprotected sex, etc.
Security - people imitating you, stealing your pictures, etc.
Acceptance is growing where? If you mean the US, perhaps check out DeVos being questioned by Katherine Clark recently (I'm not even American).
Capitalism 'can' be bad.

>>8342367
im pretty sure the desire for monogamy is almost entirely genetic/chemical, some people value it very strongly because of their brain soup

some people dont

now that monogamy isnt the default of society, naturally monogamous people are have a make an extra effort to find monogamy


i think people who strongly prefer monogamy are a minority so imposing their values on society doesnt make sense, they just have to deal with the little extra effort so the majority can do what they want to do


t. euphoric monogamy philosopher

>>8343331
>One person said something anti-gay therefore gay acceptance is falling

I'll stick to actual statistics.

>>8343515
>naturally monogamous people are have a make an extra effort to find monogamy
naturally monogamous people have to make an extra effort to find monogamy

sometimes it feels like im becoming schizo with these crazy sentence structures...

>>8343545
Considering like 1/2 couples end up having an affair, it's not that far fetched.

>>8342030
HIV, yes. Other STIs, no. Married straights cheat so hard and give each other gonorrhea and syphilis.

Living in a culture of sex probably leads to more self improvement. Gays wanna get fucked by Jonny Sixpack, not Blubberbutt McCheetofinger

>>8342420
I flipped my shit after I got a sore throat after sex from somebody without any STDs. Couldn't imagine the blood thing from a positive person. Fuck. How are you now, senpai?

>>8342742
> Companies making money is eeeevil
It goes off the assumption that "because somebody else is powerful, I am powerless."

>>8343840
Actually that particular time was not too bad. When you've had 3 or so meltdowns about getting the flu after hooking up, you realize your imagination is the worst enemy. I didnt have any symptoms that time, so I was able to keep a lid on it more than in the past.

The worst was the first time it happened. Got a really bad flu about 2 weeks after getting fucked raw in a super sketchy hookup. That time I even had to ask my str8 college buddy to sleep in his room that night cause I was in shambles.

But I'm doing great now. Haven't hooked up in 2 months. Uninstalled grindr and scruff and don't miss it at all

>>8342030
Lmao you certainly triggered some hedonistic fags

>>8342084
>>8342106
>ITT: denial

>>8345937
Must be super, super deep, because I can suck a strangers cock and get right back on netflix and feel nothing but satisfaction.

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So why is it that all the people who use Grindr ITT seem to understand that people are different and might have different desires and sexual preferences while the anti-Grindr people just shit on them and assert their personal mindset is the only right one?

>>8345961
Because people who do it have no moral ground to stand on, murderers are far less likely to argue against murder because they're doing it themselves, everyone else just sees your shit and can call it out

>>8345966
>Sex outside of relationships is like murder

Holy fuck, my sides.

The religious right says the same exact thing about homosexuality.

>>8341946
Here's how I view sex. Let me use an analogy...

I love to mountain bike. Do it as often as I can. My best times mountain biking is with my older sister, who got me into it. She's queen of the trails, knows how to handle herself, pushes me to challenge myself on the trail. We are really close and spending that time with her is always great.

If she's not around, I may ride with friends or an individual or group who may be riding. It's fun, granted not as much fun as riding with someone you're very close to, but fun anyway.

Then there are times I ride alone. No one around or available to ride so I hit the trail myself.

Sex is similar. Having sex with someone you love and care about is the best it can get. don't think anyone will argue that.

But if I'm not in a relationship, I'll have sex with a fuckbuddy or FWB. Not as good as with someone you love, but still a good time.

And if no one is around, I'll just masturbate. Would prefer another body with my but I'm not going abstain just because I'm alone.

>>8345969
Anonymous sex is as good as murder when you're spreading disease by being a degenerate

>>8345961
There are two minorities trying to speak over eachother. Neither are advocates or representatives of the Grindr "community".

>>8346033
You can spread the cold by giving someone a handshake. Is that as good as murder?

Why gonorrhea is considered the worst thing in the world and strep throat is just a normal illness is beyond me. There are only a few STDs you really have to worry about, and they're much harder to transmit than the ones you don't.

Gonorrhea clears in one day after getting a shot.

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>>8346045
Nigger I didn't say I was talking about fucking gonorrhea, I'm talking about shit that actually has the potential to fuck you up and kill you or ruin your life by making you unfuckable and undesirable. Sexual liberation is a fucking meme and you're all gonna look back at your lives the same way 80 year old whores do, faggot.

>>8346075
And in 5 years when everyone is on prep and there's an HIV vaccine?

>>8341946
It's normal and fine.
/LGBT/ is full of ugly virgins so their opinion on sex doesn't matter.
I literally can't have sex with someone I'm in a relationship with though.
Sex and caring about someone don't go together for me. Once I like you I'm not fucking you.
And I've been in a group where another young guy said the exact same thing so I'm not alone in that.
Also it's probably why marriages break down, sex is better with a stranger than someone you care about or "love".

>>8346076
1. Aids isn't the only std that can kill
2. Prep can't save you from being a hedonist piece of shit

>>8346083
>emotionally stunted human lashes out at people who value sex and their bodies because he's bitter
Ohohoho, tell me more

>>8346085
1. Other than extremely rare cases, it's the only one you really have to worry about.
2. So then you really are just basing it on morality and not anything else. Thanks for finally coming clean.

>>8346083
That's a very interesting situation you have, but you did the same thing everyone opposite you has itt.

You take your personal feelings and then make a blanket statement about love and marriage based on the assumption that everyone is like you.

So question to everyone ITT: why does it make you all so uncomfortable to imagine that other people, maybe even most people, don't share your internal sexual disposition?

>>8346088
I'm not emotionally stunted.
Your emotionally stunted if you think that sex has anything to do with love.
It also proves that you're a virgin.
I'd rather be me than some ugly virgin who justifies his lack of desirability by claiming he can't fuck someone he's not in love with.
Grow up.
Stop stuffing your face with greased food.
Go outside.
Go to the gym.
And get laid.

Moving on.

>>8346111
When did I generalise and call people names for not wanting to have casual sex?
I said personally and gave an example of another person who shares my feelings about it.

But if we are going to generalise, the vast majority of normal people enjoy having casual sex and always have.
It's a minority of people who pretend they need to be in a relationship to fuck.

>>8346100
Sure i'll admit it, I'm basing it off morality because I have the ability to reason and know that putting my dick in any old slut like an animal isn't a good idea and you're basing it on short sighted horniness that would pass if you just jerked off, feel better?

>>8346116
>normal weight
>not a virgin
>not even undesirable
Your tears are delicious. Tell me, when your parents didn't hug you did you get then too?

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>>8346122
>I-I didn't generalize, baka!
>lmao but look at all these fat virgins who don't wanna have sex with every tom, jane, and storm drain they come across, amirite?
Kek

>>8346111
>why does it make you all so uncomfortable to imagine that other people, maybe even most people, don't share your internal sexual disposition?

Good luck with that one. You'd think a group of people who spent their whole lives trying to explain to the sexual majority that their preferences are different would be more inclined to accept differences among individuals, but that's not the case on here.

>>8346122
>Also it's probably why marriages break down, sex is better with a stranger than someone you care about or "love".

Maybe you just worded it poorly, but it sounds like you're making a blanket statement.

>>8346124
Lol, it feels way better than your hand. I almost exclusively do oral when I hookup, so it's just safe and satisfying.

>>8346171
>doing things just because they feel better
Get some self respect, you absolute plebian

>>8346243
>Doing things because they feel good means you have no self respect.

Lol, you're not Roman.

>>8346246
>doesn't meme
Newfag detected

>>8346168
Probably shows that it's speculative.
I think you just need better comprehension skills.

>>8346129
If your BMI is over 22 and you're not muscular, you're fat and undesirable.
Wanking off underage boys isn't sex, freak. You're a virgin.

>>8346259
>bmi is 22
So close, I would say you should've aimed higher but aiming high doesn't seem to be your strong suit

>>8346252
Nothing to do with your use of plebeian. Denying sexual impulses was a Roman ideal, you literal plebeian.

>>8346282
>denying sexual impulses is a civilized ideal
Ftfy

>>8346289
You act like this is self-evident. Is denying your urge to eat a civilized ideal? Is denying your desire for companionship a civilized ideal?

The crux becomes what is considered excess. Gluttony is the excess of eating, for example.

You seem to think that anything other than pure monogamy with one person ever is too much sex. There's no basis for this outside of religious beliefs. I believe that being a cumpig on the other side of a glory hole is excessive. Hooking up every once in a while is not. And I still wouldn't go around telling those cumpig they're ruining society, blah blah blah

>>8346335
>You act like this is self-evident. Is denying your urge to eat a civilized ideal? Is denying your desire for companionship a civilized ideal?
It's called having some form of conscientiousness about your desires, only subhumans do things based on impulse without any further thoughts other than "so can you host?". And yes, denying impulse eating or companionship is what society calls "watching your weight so you don't end up with your own program on tlc"

>I wouldn't tell the cumpig they're ruining society
No one goes out and tells you you're a slut unless you're fucking their man, we in civilized society just slut shame them behind their back.

Sexual liberation is a meme :^)

Glorified masturbation with more cost and more risk certain types seem to glamorise as some sort of bold commendable political statement.

>>8346335
Why are you arguing about sex with a virgin shut in?

>>8346356
>everyone who doesn't approve of my life style is an ugli virgen!!!1!!1
I would tell you to choke on my dick but your gag reflex has been dead for a long time, slut :^)

>>8346366
>>8346356

>Everyone who has more than one sex partner is a slut
>Everyone who doesn't is a virgin shut I

You're both the same.

>>8346349
Nothing you just said disputed anything I said. You're intentionally avoiding what I pointed out is the actual argument, which is what arbitrary level of sexual engagement is excessive. You're pretending like your preferred level is obviously the right one while providing no justification other than "because I'm logical and not a slave to my impulses". People who enjoy a healthy amount of sex through hookups don't drop for dick the second it's presented. I think you underestimate just how much dick you can get on Grindr if you're even moderately attractive. If I wanted I could get a bareback cock in my ass every single day. I don't. I exchange blowjobs a couple times a month. That's my personal arbitrary level. I provide no more justification for it than you do for yours other than my feelings, but I also don't judge people for having a different level.

>>8341946
id rather masturbate desu

>>8346366
>He thinks calling him a slut is an insult and doesn't just make him harder

O I'm laffin

>>8341946
> "cold"
Never saw it as cold. I always cuddled afterwards.

All of my homo-relationships started on grindr. I think it's not as crazy as people think. Humans are sexual creatures.

>used to get messages all the time on grindr
>went back to college, gained 30lbs
>now undesirable and fat, no replies ever

FUCK. Wish i could just drop this weight in a single week.

Bicurious black guy here who just wants to fuck a cute twink but I'm too scared to dl grinder :'(. There's a twink on my fb who always posts about how he wants to get blacked and i jerk off about him alot. But my mom said she'd kill me if I ever fucked a guy

>>8346552
Just fuck him away from your mom. Why is this an issue? How old are you?

>>8346490
Just take a better picture. That profile picture is literally everything.

>>8342234
This.