/ftmg/ - female to male general

>>8309053
I feel like with all the phallos I see they always seems to be not quite there. Like one will have a good shape but needs some tattooing for pigmentation or good size but bad shape, good pigmentation and shape but bad size etc. I just want to mix and match them to come up with the "perfect" phalloplasty.

>>8309089
May just be "too" red pulled but is this a sort of punishment for being born female? Why is mtf srs close to identical to real pussies, but phallos usually have really bad results? Is this because "they" hate us for not having dicks, and holding power by never giving us them?

>>8309101
mtf surgery is very hit or miss. the good ones look nice but the bad ones are just an ugly mess.

>>8309101
It's easier to dig a hole than build a pole.

>>8309101
>>8309114
why cares about the look? what counts is feel and function and that's very far off for you guys and mtfs.

>>8309177
>why cares about the look
Because I want a human cis male dick so I want it to look like one and for it to pass in locker rooms and shit.
>>8309177
>what counts is feel and function
True also. I want the looks, feel and functionality.

>>8309213
>and for it to pass in locker rooms and shit.

>getting changed in public

>>8309177
I'm very vain and there's no point in having a dick if it isn't decent looking

>>8309254
Hah actually I'd never do that but I thought it was more of a normal/acceptable reason than saying I wanted to have my bases covered of not being outed if someone pants me or something.

>>8309283
Like a reverse Ace Ventura?

Been on test for 2 years with no clit growth. I wanted it to help me out for when I get metoidioplasty.

>>8309291
Basically

>>8309308
there's always dht cream

>>8309383
Does that work? Is there documentation of it actually working vs just T?

Hi y'all. I have some qs about a friend. Maybe you could offer some insight.
>TLDR:
>I knew my friend (born female, age 20) for a decade.
>She had some degree of discomfort with her female body for as long as I have known her.
>She has been living with anxiety and depression for 5 years.
>I am wondering what effect a FTM transition may have on her anxiety, depression, and gender dysphoria.
>INB4 not your blog

>>8309657
If they're unhappy with being female and would rather be male there's a good chance that transition might help them. that's ultimately up to them though and if they aren't sure they should definitely see a therapist first.

>>8309657
>BACKGROUND:
>(Born female, let’s call her Jane; she currently uses she/her)
>I knew Jane for almost a decade, from when she was 12 years old.
>She is now 20, going on 21.
On the matters of her anxiety and depression:
>from 12 to 15, she was lively, energetic, social, talkative, and explorative- as noted by me, those around Jane, and Jane herself.
>From about 15 to 20, Jane switched to becoming apathetic, lethargic, phlegmatic, insular, anxious in social settings, and depressed- as noted by me, those around Jane including her therapist, and Jane herself.
>Her words: “I can’t even bring myself to have fun anymore”.
>She's has no aggression, often unaware of her surroundings (may not realize someone is speaking to her for minutes at a time), and zones out into her own world.
>The only way to have a normal conversation became via text- and infrequently at that. She doesn’t even like to video chat.

>>8309308
on this subject, does anyone know if clit growth is reversible? i'm a detransitioner (srry) and Ive been off T for over a year but haven't seen a noticeable change. It doesn't bother me, but I'm insecure about it showing through clothing or more importantly putting off potential partners.

>>8309699
How much growth have you had? Just don't wear anything too tight or wear something tight enough to hold it in place.

>>8309680
Thanks! I'm not "talking her our of it" or anything, I'm more interested in what comes about from this. She is seeing both her own psychoanalyst and a HRT counselor.
>>8309689
On the matter of dysphoria:
>as noted by her counselor and Jane herself- she had indicated some degree of it to me for as long as I had known her, from a more simple “I don’t like my small, frail, little girl body” to what later became a more complex general discomfort with her female form.
>She went through puberty, in that she has a regular menstrual cycle, however her doctors noted her hormonal levels are lower than average. She always identified as asexual (not just low libido).

On the matter of her personal life:
>she always was and still is very bright, curious, creative, and intellectually flexible.
>This has been true for her art work, web design, role-play world-building, fun philosophical debates we had where she was quick on her feet, gaming, her academic and career aspirations (Electrical Engineering, though she also wants to get into game design of some form).
> However, as the years passed, she withdrew from more social interests to more personal ones, or ones which can only be practiced alone, furthermore adopting a more Nihilistic mode of thinking.
>She was never and is not overweight- perhaps a bit underweight, despite her lethargy.
>For purposes of picturing her, she stands at 5’1” (or 154 cm), is pale, freckled, and ginger. Jane lives with her dorm-mates, and can function independently at that capacity, though has little connection or contact with them.
> She is getting counseling for her transition, and is going through general psychological therapy sessions.

>>8309714
On the matter of her hormone therapy:
>She has been going through HRT counseling for a while and understands the implications.
>Her first testosterone injection is tomorrow.
>She thinks it will help her not only with her dysphoria, but her anxiety and depression as well.
>Jane is actually looking forward to it, one of the few things she has been looking forward to.
QUESTIONS:
>She seems happy about going FTM, but I am not sure she will be permanently happy with it, and am unsure if the transition- at least alone- will help with her depression.
> Is there any information, from data to anecdotes, about how many regret the decision, and how often depression is actually be helped?
>What can be expected to change and when? On the matters of her personality, physiology, general levels of energy, etc, what can we expect day 1? Week 1? Months 2, 3, 4? Years 2, 3,4? I’m aware it’s not the same for everyone, but is there a general timeline available?

>>8309714
>role-play world-building, fun philosophical debates
Elaborate?

>she withdrew from more social interests to more personal ones, or ones which can only be practiced alone, furthermore adopting a more Nihilistic mode of thinking.
What more personal/solo interests? What nihilistic thinking?

>>8309706
a couple of inches probably. that was one of the first effects from hrt i noticed

>>8309736
I imagine growth goes down. Maybe not back to before but a little. After all one of the common effects of mtfs going on hormones is shrinkage.

Any of you start transitioning at 25 yrs old or later?

>>8309699
I've heard it's one of the effects that is permanent
You can try taking E or something? I'm not sure if that would help.

>>8309699
I heard it is pretty much irreversible without surgery. A lot of changes are permanent, they just become less pronounced once you get off T. Like if you got facial hair, it doesn't just go away.

Might I ask why you decided to detransition? I thought this was something guys only really went one way, never heard of any regrets.

>>8309847
>I thought this was something guys only really went one way, never heard of any regrets.
O_O

>>8309847
I just wasn't feeling it anymore. I was so sure that was what I wanted when I was 20, and it felt good and exciting at first, but by 24 I was practically a different person and I wished I had stayed a female. I saw my female friends becoming wives and mothers and I realized that at the end of the day that's what I want too. Hopefully it's not too late.
It's ok though, I learned some things about myself and about life and I don't regret it. But I don't really want the changes to stay permanent either. I had laser for my facial hair, and my voice is still kinda deep, but I just tell people it's from smoking. I don't know if I'm infertile or not. I'll cross that bridge when I come to it.
I'm not trying to dissuade you guys from transitioning, just think long and hard about where you see yourself in 10, 20, 50 years and make sure it's what you really want.

>>8309884
>but by 24 I was practically a different person and I wished I had stayed a female.
How had you changed as a person in those 4 years?

>>8309884
What made you want to transition in the first place?

I can't relate to the feeling of being a wife/mother, if anything I've always wanted to be the husband/father anyway.

>>8309876
Stop that.

>>8309884
Personally I felt more submissive and vulnerable whenever I was in girl mode. It did kind of work in an interesting way when dating guys. So I can kind of get the idea of wanting to be a wife. It really felt vulnerable and weak at other times, and without the boyfriend to protect me it felt so wrong.

I do find assertiveness, and masculinity (which I don't believe is toxic) attractive in a partner, but at some point I realized I really wanted that for myself.

I know most likely I'll be alone as I get older and as an independent person a male person is the best version of myself.

>>8309893
I kind of grew up I guess. I dropped out of college and had a restaurant job where I managed people and had a good bit of responsibility (pretty much the first thing I ever took seriously), supported myself for the first time, stopped drinking myself into oblivion every weekend.
And I got my first boyfriend, which I think was a big part of it. I wasn't just myself anymore, I was part of a couple, which comes with new dynamics and commitments. And I just felt like I wanted to be a girl with a boyfriend rather than a guy with a boyfriend. It seemed more desirable to me that way. I can go into details if you really want, but it's just boring stuff like him being taller than me or me getting him a beer when he asks. I mean yeah you could do that in a gay relationship too, but I just wanted a straight relationship.
I was going to add something else but I forget what.
>>8309915
>What made you want to transition in the first place?
I went through an indignant feminist phase where I thought I was getting the short end of the stick by being female. I thought society, most individuals, and even biology were misogynistic.
I think I had a lot of feelings of inferiority at that time based around my gender that I mistook for dysphoria. I've since realized that men and women are just different and neither one is better or has it better. Seeing how shitty men can be helped a lot. After I left my restaurant job and got a new one I got bullied by my coworkers for being small and gay, not only that but I realized that a lot of the things I saw as weakness in women were just as common in men, and in some ways they're worse.
Basically I thought the grass was greener and it actually wasn't.

>>8309938
Wow, I think I was the opposite. I tried to become that masculine, assertive person myself only to later figure out that that's what I want in a partner and I would prefer to be the submissive and vulnerable one. Somewhere inside me the indignant feminist still cringes at that thought, but I've learned it's probably best to ignore her sometimes.

>>8309943
>I can go into details if you really want, but it's just boring stuff like him being taller than me or me getting him a beer when he asks.
I am interested. I wouldn't have thought to necessarily connect the beer thing to straight relationships. The relationship dynamic is pretty interesting and seems to be a big part of the decision for a lot of trans people, ftm and mtf.

>but I realized that a lot of the things I saw as weakness in women were just as common in men, and in some ways they're worse.
Which things?

>>8309938
Feeling vulnerable I get but how did girlmode make you "feel submissive"?

>>8310003
>I am interested.
It's pretty well summed up by what I said here:
>>8309956
I want a partner who is masculine and assertive and I want to be the submissive and vulnerable one. I'm not going to name off a bunch of stuff because cringe.
>I wouldn't have thought to necessarily connect the beer thing to straight relationships.
It's not that way in all of them, but I think in any relationship one partner is more dominant, whether it's 51/49 or 90/10, and in a straight relationship it's usually the man.
>The relationship dynamic is pretty interesting and seems to be a big part of the decision for a lot of trans people, ftm and mtf.
yeah, it seems that way. I don't have any transcendental wisdom to drop, but I guess gender identity is linked pretty closely to romance and sex, and matters in those areas more than most.

>Which things?
small mindedness, constant insecurity, neediness, selfishness, gossipy-ness, just generally being shitty people.
I'm not saying ALL men are like that, but not all women are either, just a lot of both.
On top of that, men are often arrogant as fuck. The guy I used to work with who bullied me for being gay was the worst. Basically every word out of his mouth that wasn't about work was either how great he was or how terrible someone else was. That was actually a lot more grating than being called gay. As soon as I noticed the trend I could barely stand the guy anymore. Most guys aren't that bad, but a lot of them are pretty full of themselves.
And at least women care about other people, their family and friends or something. I'm sure many guys do too, but many of them seem to be obsessed with themselves and only themselves.

>>8309727

>Elaborate?
Long-running scifi rps, free-will v determinism, demarcating ownership, implications of traveling near black holes but retaining sentience, etc.

>What more personal/solo interests?
Drawing alone. Playing solo games. Solo walks. Daydreaming.

> What nihilistic thinking?
Nothing matters. What's the point? Why bother with school? Who would care? Etc.

>>8310079
>I want a partner who is masculine and assertive and I want to be the submissive and vulnerable one. I'm not going to name off a bunch of stuff because cringe.
I'm mtf and I relate to the female side of this and the beer thing quite a lot. It's small but it's a hint at that dynamic. Some things I'll never be able to take the submissive side as much as a cis woman, like height, but other little observations remind me of what I can do despite being trans, so I know what to look for when finding a dynamic I'm comfortable with.

>>8310085
That's how I felt but it could just be feeling purposeless and lonely, not necessarily dysphoric. Periodically try initiation conversations and rps with her in case she is up for them but not up for initiating them herself.

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>>8310213
>>8310085

Given that anon has said their friend "Jane"... "J"... is starting shots and is under the care of a shrink, I feel it is in poor taste to keep using female pronouns.

But what do I know.

>Tfw my vagina reeks like a dick now.
I didn't expect it

>>8310406
neat

what are the ftm perspectives on small dicks? is it more "well at least they have a cock and a small cock is better than having no cock at all"
or "i would rather just keep my cunt if my cock is going to be under 5 (or insert other length here nmiaow) inches"

t. 4 inch-ish cock having cis male

>>8310538
I'll trade you.

>>8310538
Having a small [functioning/healthy] penis is better than a vag hole.

Having nothing but a piss slit is better than a vag hole, even.

(Pee hole =/= Vag hole btw)

>>8310538
If I could get a functioning cis dick, even if it was small I'd be happy.

>>8310538
If the dick was real and not an arm skin corndog I would be totally happy. It would be cool if the penis had foreskin intact, too.

>>8310538
I would love to have a 4 inch dick desu

>>8309943
Yeah, you have a pretty common case of how FtM detransitioners work. Thanks for not becoming a TERF, at least.

>>8310538
I'd rather have a small cock and have confidence issues over it rather than wanting to kill myself because I know I'll never have a cis dick

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I feel like I'm about to come out. I'm really tempted to send a message to my mom along the lines of "Can we talk about something important later?", or just "I'm trans". What's the best course of action? My heart's racing right now, I feel like I want and have to, but I'm so nervous about it, I can't handle it.

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>>8311201
It took me about a month to come out at 11 but when I did I waited until my biofather was going to hang out with me for the entire day, so I came out to my mother by waiting until the last possible minute, I mean while I was walking out the door saying goodbye I slipped in "Im a boy". never actually came out to biofather, he got told by my mother the next week along with the rest of family by my mother.

tldr; go out for an entire day but before you close the door come out to them

>>8311219
I had this idea in mind (I've done it before with other things), but the stress of waiting until I'm back to see what she had to say would be awful too

>>8310325
>>8309689
>let’s call her Jane; she currently uses she/her)

>>8311239
it gave her enough time to internalize it and it gave me time to prepare for the worst. I actually expected to be kicked out of the house because even at 11 years old I was sitting on 4chan reading about how some other tranny got kicked out and made homeless. Instead I sat down and watched boys dont cry at 2 am and afterwards called a therapist which I still have the same one.

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>>8311249
>She seems happy about going FTM, but I am not sure she will be permanently happy with it,

Anon is giving us conflicting info, J is in therapy is "going ftm" ... he.

>She (J)has been going through HRT counseling for a while and understands the implications.
>Her (J's) first testosterone injection is tomorrow.

Anon is just trying to bolster their desire to keep gendering their friend J as female with anecdotes, I see no need to support that.

If J is still letting anon slide with using female pronouns they are probably just still at that "nothing matters" stage of depression or do not want to rock anons boat and drive off a "friend".

Bad form, Peter, bad form.

>>8311219
Move out, then tell them.

Ah, but I got shaken by the hair for being a "lesbian" when I tried to explain trans to my ma.

So, I moved out. Cut the family off until they got on board.

Amazing how that shifts the dynamic; your presence in their lives becomes a commodity, one which /you/ control.

When you live under "their roof" they are emboldened to be assholes and to see every decision as a childish phase to be crushed.

If anyone here has had surgical glue after top surgery, how many weeks post op did it start peeling off?

What horrors do you guys like?

If we're naming specific directors the horror type movies of Carpenter (fav: The Thing), Cronenberg (fav: Videodrome), and Raimi (fav: Evil Dead 2) are my favorites.

Specific movies I love not from those directors the original Fright Night and Re-Animator.

>>8313005
If I were going to go for more classic ones they'd be from the 70s. Halloween, alien, the hills have eyes, the omen, the exorcist ...

Then I would skip to the 90s because I'm not that into 80 horror (sorry) for a few good ones but I think those are more for nostalgia than anything else

Otherwise for more modern ones I like american psycho, house of 1000 corpses and devils rejects, excision and the descent.

Plus throw in some classic japanese horror cause I'm a weeb and they're good films.

>>8313005

For recent works: Cabin in the Woods
That was a riot.

>>8313445
Man I thought I was going to hate that film when it started but they proved me stupid.

>>8313005
Fright Night is really good. I also like Trick R Treat, The Mist, and House of the Devil.

>>8309699
Not reversible. Big clits are hot, though.

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>tfw mtf
>tfw no ftm bf for purest form of love

>>8313480
I know, right?
I like genre spoofs in general... Galavant, Sayonara Zetsubou Sensei, Excel Saga, Slayers. I was even getting into Powerless, shame it got cancelled... it was campy like Adam West's Batman.

>>8311504
Ye, I feel so much pain when people use she/her on me but I don't correct them because I don't pass yet.. He probably feels the same way, if he's actually an ftm.

>>8309657
>>8309689
>>8309714
>>8309726
So are you a psych student or something? Kind of a weird set up, I feel like I'm being quizzed for somebody's homework.

>what can be expected to change and when?
The problem is it varies pretty wildly from person to person. It's pretty individual. All you're doing is flipping the switch to bring some of the other aspects of your hardwired coding into the forefront. Some dudes report calming the fuck down. Some guys get more aggressive. There's no clear metric and there haven't exactly been a lot of studies done on this subject.

Also yeah RDJ makes a good point, why aren't you gendering J as masc? If they're undergoing HRT they're probably ready to be male, and they're unlikely to remain stealth for terribly long if they aren't.

>>8313005
I love found footage horror and slasher films. I really like the Scream t.v. series. I still really love the original Blair Witch Project. And half of the Paranormal Activity movies. The found footage ones work well for people like me who let their imagination spook them.

>>8313596
This, except I'd probably get dysphoric if I held your hand and it was bigger than mine and I've got pretty small skele hands

>>8314021
It is especially hard with people you fear losing... and after the deoression killed J's social life they are unlikely to have many friends left.

>>8314112
it's okay man i'd be dysphoric holding you with my big ol grabbers

>>8313005
House of 1000 Corpses
The Fly
Re-Animator
Eraserhead, Lost Highway if you count Lynch as horror

I'm more of a thriller person than a horror person generally.

Advice?: I picked my name when I was 14 and used it all though high school, my 5 or so friends all use it as well as some (2) members of my family. I'd like to change it to something else now, for several reasons. I'm in a position where when I come out at work I can use a name I've become attached to in the last couple years right off. Do you think this would create problems? I plan on using the original name as my middle name.

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>>8314189
>big ol grabbers

My fetish

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>>8314189
It's fine I'll just wear these

God help me, I kind of want to get rid of one of my cats.

I never meant to have more than one, but the kitten I rescued, they found a sibling and got me to take him in 'temporarily'..

Now they just. They fight. A lot. They're brothers, grew up together, and they just fucking tear into each other sometimes. I hate it. Tonight they waited for the five seconds I was on the toilet to rip into each other, the one fucking moment I couldn't get up and separate them.

I hate cats.
Anybody want a ginger?

>>8314254
>I plan on using the original name as my middle name

This is reasonable, lots of cis guys use/used a middle name as kids or with friends; especially if they have their dad or grandads name, less confusing in the household.

>>8314030
>So are you a psych student or something?
Was a psych student before switching majors,but that's neither here nor there.

>Kind of a weird set up, I feel like I'm being quizzed for somebody's homework.
Kek sorry, I would take a more conversational tone, but I'm afraid there are people who would say "You misrepresented X!" "You omitted Y!" "You're disrespecting her in Z!". If /pol/ and /leftypol/ debates taught me anything, it's never to underestimate the power of contrived reader misconceptions.

>The problem is it varies pretty wildly from person to person. It's pretty individual. All you're doing is flipping the switch to bring some of the other aspects of your hardwired coding into the forefront. Some dudes report calming the fuck down. Some guys get more aggressive. There's no clear metric and there haven't exactly been a lot of studies done on this subject.
Hmm.. so a wildcard. What's the best thing for me and her close circle to do during the transition over the next several years? I mean, I know there's the generic "be there for J".

>Also yeah RDJ makes a good point, why aren't you gendering J as masc? If they're undergoing HRT they're probably ready to be male, and they're unlikely to remain stealth for terribly long if they aren't.

Jane's choice. When she feels comfortable adopting his and him, I'll immediately follow suit.
>>8310213
Ja, well I tried to demarcate the depression and anxiety (professional's words, not mine) from the dysphoria, but I was just wondering if there's any data for those that had either or both before a transition, and what happened to those people after

>Periodically try initiation conversations and rps with her in case she is up for them but not up for initiating them herself.
Good point. We'll slowly try to engage with her to see if there's any change in sociability over the course of time
>>8309726
>UPDATE!
So J got the first T injection today, and was taught how to conduct subsequent injections wo.supervision

>>8314649
Okay, so this is a bit off-topic, but am I the asshole here(or could at least be reasonable construed as one)? This board seems to be taking what was written pretty receptively, whereas by contrast, Reddit took it with some degree of hostility.
>Don't really care for "revealing" my Reddit UN; it's unconnected to anything important, anyway.

https://www.reddit.com/r/ftm/comments/6c18ws/what_effect_may_a_ftm_transition_may_have_on_my/?utm_content=title&utm_medium=user&utm_source=reddit

I am in love with a boy. I’m a Cisgendered straight male. He's not transitioned but wants to do T, I feel he never trusted me enough to tell me more. He's always been private; I always wanted to know more just out of interest cos I care. I've done research but haven't had the opportunity to learn from first hand experiences. It gets complicated; I’m in an open relationship with a straight woman, whom I love. He is in a relationship with a woman, but in his own words, it’s toxic. He’s a good friend to my gf which is how we met. He started messing around with my gf, which led to a threesome. I started thinking about him a lot and realized that I really enjoy his company and how he makes me feel. I talked to my gf and she was ok with me pursuing him, so I got drunk and spilled my guts to him after some heavy flirting, he said that, even though he’s still in a commitment with this other person and tried to tell her about it, she was manipulating him and making him feel like shit about himself for wanting me, and led him to recognize a lot of toxic shit over the years. He had a breakdown and told me that no matter how much he wanted me, he couldn’t act on it because of his previous commitment and that he wanted me just for himself and didn’t want to share but that he might change his mind for me, and cos they’re both friends. I’ve been extremely honest with everybody, I don’t want to hurt either of them but I really want him, and it kinda hurts not to be able to be together. He’s identified as Pansexual, and said that he would date anyone who he felt was a good match. Since I was very young I’ve had a thing for twinks basically, and I loved that androgyny and feminine look which he fits. But I’ve never had a homosexual relationship before I haven’t been able to find any info on like, this type of relationship, other than the off-comment of ftm trans men preferring women, and not much else. This boy means the world to me and I just want some advice maybe??? and to vent

>>8314911
TL;DR. You're gay.

>>8310325>>8311249 >>8311504 >>8314021 >>8314154
>Anon is just trying to bolster their desire to keep gendering their friend J as female with anecdotes, I see no need to support that.

Again- unsure of how many times this has to be restated-this is J's preference, not mine. I'm not one to question it. If J is to adopt male pronouns, so will I immediately.

are any of you sexually attracted to men?

>>8315062
yes i believe i've posted >tfw no bf about a thousand times by now

>>8314911
just, tell him how you feel dude

>>8315062
yes, i'm bi

>>8309786
I'm 26. Realistically anywhere under 30 is "young", try not to take too much notice of /lgbt/ where you're told you need to start hrt at 10 or you're not """trutrans"""

>>8314298
Have they been neutered?

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Opinions on Carter as a name?

>>8315500
Are you black? If so it's a good name but a white dude named Carter is weird.

>>8315439
At about 8 months, both of them.

>>8314649
They're not becoming an entirely different person, they're just going to socially adjust to being treated as male. Physical changes are to be expected, but personality shouldn't much. Like somebody in the reddit said, it'll treat the dysphoria, which, if it's a source of the depression, should alleviate that significantly.
But it's not a magic wand cure-all. I still personally got brain problems, they're just not as bad as they were before and I'm more capable of dealing with them. Your friend is seeing a professional. Let it be and don't panic and over scrutinize this so much. It's their choice and they're being responsible about how they move forward with this.

Question for anyone who had to stop T for surgery/other reason and got their period. How long did it take to stop once you got back on T?

I really like our current starter image. We ought to do the next one as a really dark grey, and call the file "notquiteblack"

>>8315603
This.

>>8315057
You just seem an unreliable narrator. I dunno how to explain it, you seem like you are actively trying to construct your posts in such a way as to manipulate for your desired response - which is clearly that you want us to declare J as not "trutrans" or say that J will regret it.

Even speaking to J directly wont give us insight for that kind of prediction, we sure as hell cannot make any claim using info that passes through the myopic lens of your point of view.

You read as a neck beard, pseudo white knight, who stuck around through J's depression because you have a hero complex and crave a damsel to protect.

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Lads I've got a problem. I'm not "out" and pre-t so I still look feminine and go to the gym. Only problem is I feel uncomfortable using the women's changing rooms - I change behind the curtained off stalls, and try to be stealth about using the shower cubicles. It feels wrong for me to be in there while women nonchalantly strip off in front of one another. And I know my body is still female and if they saw me naked I'd just be "one of the girls" but still...it feels pretty perverted.

And because I still look feminine, it wouldn't be right to use the men's changing room either. I dunno guys, is it ok for me to use the women's room for now or is it wrong?

>>8314664
r/ftm is a shithole so that's not surprising

>>8316004
Just use the stalls man.
You woukd get beat or booted from the dudes. Change rooms are just awkward no matter what.

if you got phallo would you get the inflatable or the malleable/semi-rigid penile implant?

asking because im trying to decide

>>8316004
If you're presenting female and have stalls anyway what's there to feel perverted about?

And as for the showers, lesbians can shower there anyway, just like gay men can in the men's, and nobody sees a problem with this.

>>8316138
I wouldn't get any implants because that means indefinite surgeries for the inevitable replacements which also requires cutting your dick back open, ruining any sensation you've gained, keeping your body in a perpetual state of trauma.

No thanks.
Just wear a cock sleeve or double condoms, I hear that works pretty decently for some phallo guys.

>>8316138
I'd probably do malleable/semi-rigid. Having to pump it up would just be too weird imo.

>>8316422
wrong thread, sister

>>8316422
stupid hons not knowing how to read

>>8316431
oops, my bad
thanks for that~

>>8314972
Ayy

>>8315214
I did, I just... wasn't sure he'd be into guys.

>>8316138
The inflatable one, I'd imagine it'd be weird and awkward to have a constantly hard dick. >>8316170
I think there is a specific implant for ftms that negates the need for multiple replacements.

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how do you guys cope with the idea of waiting for hrt probably an upwards of 6+ months ?? apparently the gender clinic im going thru rn (CHOP) thinks im too emotionally immature to start hrt despite being 20 ... ?? so ill probably end up going to an informed consent clinic after i save up some money (CHOP is covered by my insurance).

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>>8316656
ffs more backstory: i forgot to add that ive waited a year + two months inbetween appointments for these two CHOP appointments aswell so im really fucking stressed from what theyve told me

>>8316643
No, there isn't. All implants will need to be replaced eventually. The semi-rigid ones have the potential to possibly go to 15 years max, (I've heard 20 once, but chances of that are pretty low) but you WILL need to get it surgically replaced eventually.

>>8316643
>>8316734
Also the inflatable implant has the least durability. Some people are unlucky enough that that need it replaced or taken out after 2 years, but it usually lasts somewhere between 3-10 years.

>>8316656
I started at 25 when I wanted to start at 15 so suck it up.

>>8316656
What is it about you that makes them think you're emotionally immature?

Anyone avoid swimming in the summer? I haven't swam in a decade due to dysphoria.

I haven't had top surgery and even after it, I feel like I am going to be too self-concious about scarring to do so.

Also wearing a tshirt while swimming looks stupid as fuck - is there any alternative torso-covering swimwear that doesn't look dumb as shit/conspicuous?

>>8317167
I had keyhole so I have minimal scarring and like to go shirtless.
If you're in the ocean you could wear a wetsuit. Otherwise idk.

>>8317190
Are your nipples perky? I heard that's a downside to keyhole surgery.

>>8317167
I've gone swimming in a tank and my binder and don't give a shit what anyone else thinks, just saying

>tfw no bf (female)

>>8317020
i have bpd & am currently living with my parents due to being on medical leave from college (plan to go back this september as a returning freshman, but it depends on how well i feel), & haven't really done alot with my life since highschool. they think that im confused about my identity due to my bpd (imho thats what im getting from this situation, but i could be wrong about them assuming that bc of my bpd, but whatever), & they believe that ill change my mind in the future. also i exhibit alot of attention seeking behavior, & from what ive gathered, they may think that im doing this for attention or something ... god fucking knows why the hell someone would put themselves thru the shitstorm that is being trans lmao. there are much better ways to get attention without THAT amount of effort.

>>8317205
Kinda. They're kinda big for male nipples too. But no one seems to look twice because no one cares about male nipples.

>>8316994 :(

>>8317240
Pics? Dont show your face. Im eligible for keyhole but im so picky about my nips looking ok.

>>8317237
Hm. How long have you felt actual dysphoria? Years of it would speak a lot louder than having BPD.

>>8316677
man the fuck up bitchboy

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>>8317167
Here you go, bro.

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https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xn7PXzlp2YM

Saw my shrink today
He said girl I can’t help you
I’ve been seeing you so long
But nothing has changed

You tried Adderall and alcohol
Sadly the facts remain
You’re terminally normal
I’m sorry to say

I shaved my head
I changed my name
I gave my pills away

If I can’t be someone else
If I can’t be someone else
If I can’t be someone else
I might as well be myself

Hangin’ with the hipsters
Is a lot of hard work
How many selfies can you take
Before you look like a jerk
I took an Uber to a juice bar
To hear a new indie band play
They got 99 million followers
In only one day

Well I took the pic
I made the slip
Got in a stranger’s car
The heels don’t fit
So I finally quit
And headed down to my favorite bar

’Cause, if I can’t be someone else
If I can’t be someone else
If I can’t be someone else
I might as well be myself

Don’t you want to be your own girl
Don’t you want to be your own girl
Don’t you want to be your own girl

If I can’t be someone else
If I can’t be someone else
If I can’t be someone else

If I can’t be someone else
If I can’t be someone else
If I can’t be someone else
I might as well be myself

>>8317361
probably since i was about 6 or so. i was pretty gnc as a kid & it only got worse as i got to middle school & onward. i just never acknowledged it until i got to mid highschool & actually learned what being trans meant. also taking into account i attended a very conservative christian school until fifth grade, too, so i was a dumbass when it came to knowing about anything lgbt+ related.

>>8317369 i have the attention span of a walnut desu

>>8317393
Did you tell them that and go into detail about it?

>>8317418 yeah, a shitton. but their program is for trans kids aged 13 - 21 so i think they may just be used to working with people that are younger than i am. i was recommended to go by my aunt who works at the hospital itself, & it was one of the only places that took my insurance, so i thought why not. this was also before i knew about planned parenthood's informed consent w hrt. so if this doesnt pan out well then ill probably just got the pp near me.

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What do you do when you're feeling down, /ftmg/?

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>>8318142
sleep, listen to music, fap, play vidya, eat, meditate, skateboard, watch people play vidya, watch movies or shows, smoke, draw, learn random things, etc

>>8317167
>Also wearing a tshirt while swimming looks stupid as fuck
I'm chubby so they probably just think I'm self conscious about my man tits, which, technically, is accurate. I try not to give much of a fuck, and nobody hassled me last time I went to the beach. I love the ocean too much to entirely miss a rare opportunity to go dunk myself in it.

You could go for a wet suit? They make less srs bsns ones than full-on surfer tier.

>>8318142
Play bideo games
Watch movies
Hug cat
Write in my journal... which sounds kind of lame but it makes me feel better.

>>8318142
Sleep

>>8317167
For when I'm with friends and family I just go topless. Hanging out at the beach I do tank and binder. Swimming in pools I've a surf suit I think it's called - a wet suit of sorts with short legs and no sleeves.

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>>8318524
>For when I'm with friends and family I just go topless.

am i right in believing you're pre-surgery and just let the entire titty out around your family and friends

>>8318524
>For when I'm with friends and family I just go topless.
Did you do the same in girlmode before coming out?

It feels weird to for the same tits to be acceptable, to oneself or others, exposed depending only on gender identity, when they're the exact same chest.

Do mtfs cover their chests as though they're cis girls even before growing tits?

>>8318524
>with friends and family I just go topless
That's... weird

>>8318524
My family and friends would freak out. Even if i got top surgery. Wtf?

>>8318672
Not for a cis guy, which I guess is the standard he holds himself to.

>>8318546
>>8318672
>>8318697
Is this Americans having a highly stigmatized relationship to the naked body, or is my family just chill?
Obviously, family and family are different, same with friends and friends. In general, though, they've known me for years and they've probably seen my tits before in one context or another. If we're that close, it's not like it's a secret that I've a chest.

>>8318551
I came out to myself when I was 14 (I turn 21 this year), I was never all that feminine to begin with and as soon as I started understanding my dysphoria I went from loving to swim to avoiding the water for like, two years, but even before that I was NEVER comfortable with swim tops. I thought it was because of body issues, but I only recently realized that covering it up made me feel like I was drawing attention to my chest.
I guess it's like, if I'm in a context where social dysphoria isn't an issue (as in the people I am with know and respect my identity), then going topless makes me feel more at ease because it feels more natural and like that part of my body isn't a big, forbidden no-no.

My least favorite meme is seeing all of these transitioned FTMs (grats to them, by the way) who have way more facial and body hair than me, some cis male.

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The other day I finally got a diploma after being held back in school. It's good that I no longer have to worry about transistioning in school. However, besides that I don't feel very happy. I feel pretty lonely, actually.

The day of graduation made me realize how many people cared about me. I didn't keep any friends, but the teachers really loved me. Before I left I met with my history teacher to say goodbye and he had this sorrowful look in his eyes like he was about to cry. He wanted to hug me so I just let him. As he patted my back I thought of how better it would be if I could just be cis. That way if I stayed in contact with anyone I wouldn't be disappointing them and I would never be seen as a "disgusting" tranny. Honestly, I wish I could have been born as his son. He wanted me to email him and have lunch with him. I don't think I'm willing to take the chance though.

>>8318772
i'm not even american and you make your family sound like quasi-nudists

naturally small chest?

>>8318778
genetics will swing it there as much as for any cis guy, i'm 2+ years on T and can barely grow facial hair

>>8318802
Good luck with your transition!

I guess that makes me feel a bit better, but being teased about the lack of hair on my chest and face sucks sometimes.

>>8318802
C-cup. And we're not, really. My mother and aunt are both divorced and will laugh about being old and unattractive and run around doing yardwork in their bras, but aside from that I guess we just have a good relationship. My brother is seventeen and he's mostly chill with it.

>>8318701
But what if that cis dude woke up with big tits? He probably keep a shirt on.
>>8318772
not american but can be prude

>>8318778
mmm I imagine the dick makes up for it

>>8318884
:<
Sorry

>>8318896
Hah, don't be sorry dude

>>8318910
Ohkie dokie, not sorry.

>>8318772
>or is my family just chill?
I don't know, how much do the women in your family let their tits get seen?

Would your family and friends be as comfortable with you being topless if you were a cis girl?

>>8318778
Top kek, bro.

>>8319037
No, bottom.
Bottom kek.

>>8318772
I'm one of the people you responded to. I'm French-German but I, like my American friends, don't want to see eachother naked. Not even shirtless.

I personally find moobs disgusting so seeing tits still on an ftm would be the same thing to me.

Got a gc2b binder today, and I love it. Better at flattening and way more comfortable than the underworks tank I had previously. Today I wore a v neck for the first time without feeling disgusted with my chest and body.

The strange thing was, as soon as I got in on and felt right about my chest, I started distressing over other features -- particularly my smooth feminine skin and eyelashes. I've heard about this happening but it kinda shocked me.

Unrelated but do any of you have the strange sensation of looking in the mirror naked and thinking you're hot, even if your body doesn't feel like yours?

>>8319092
I've never looked in a mirror and felt "hot".

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>>8319042
do you mind if the dick is real or not though?

>>8319092
>Unrelated but do any of you have the strange sensation of looking in the mirror naked and thinking you're hot, even if your body doesn't feel like yours?
I've only felt utter disgust for my naked body but yes for my face

>>8319211
Uhm, not really I guess?
I dunno.

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>>8319218
can I violently stick a silicone dong in your ass and then play vidya

>>8319232
Sounds rather lewd, tho.

But more importantly, what vidya?

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>>8319235
the only vidya I have are Lotr OoT, gta 5 for ps4, and Pokemon omega sapphire because im poor. I didnt think this over.

>>8319235
...
you can watch me speedrun lotr oot to completion in 3 hours

>>8319247
Never played any Zelda games cause I was the youngest of 3 brothers and never got a turn to play on the consoles.
But man, I love Pokemon. The first I played was Fire Red, I think.
>>8319257
No thank you, I'm already preoccupied with playing with my pup and watching Spirited Away

>>8310538
Would absolutely love having a 4 inch cis dick, anon! I'd be proud as a peacock if I had that. I hate my vag and do not want to keep it around for anything.

>>8318778
Wanna trade your dick for some more facial hair?!

What's the best haircut to get when going back to boy mode?
I don't want to shave my head

t. former mtf

>>8319272
>pup
I'll show you mine if you show me yours.

>>8320588
How far did you transition? Why give up?

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>>8320890
Deal.

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>>8319247
>>8319257
well in my sleep deprived state I seem to have confused lord of the rings and legends of zelda

>>8321055
Noticed

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>>8320970
10/10 pup.

>>8320970
>>8321240
Aww cute puppers, I would love a corgi pup but I'm trying to distance myself from having things I care about.

>>8321240
So smol
How old?
>>8321381
Please don't do that

>>8320588
>go to barber
>"hey I need a haircut that will make me look more masculine. No buzzcut btw"
>he cuts your hair

>>8321406
7 weeks today, he's at the biting stage. Little bastard, but god he's gotten so fluffy.

>>8321381
Puppies are good for the soul, anon.

>>8321527
My god, that's too adorable.
My puppy is actually 10 years old
But I still call him a puppy

>>8321540
All dogs are puppies if they smile. I call pup's parents puppies too, one of them technically still is.

>>8321607
>All dogs are puppies
You could have ended the sentence there.

>>8320911
Pretty far
Even had ffs but still don't pass because my face is still fairly masculine and I have a broad body

Hey guys I have a question for you. Okay so I noticed like most of my followers on Instagram that don't know me in real life are transguys, or people that like my posts are transguys. I usually end up following them back but I'm just wondering, why did this happen? I don't dislike it, I'm just wondering how it happened because I don't post anything particularly transguy related. I'm a cishet ace girl btw.

>>8322451
probably trenders, ive never used instagram but maybe it's the algorithm, might be recommended to follow because you followed other trenders

>>8322532
I haven't followed trenders though. Two of the guys I know are pretty cool, and one's gone full way (he hasn't followed me, just liked a post of mine). Tbh I think I've developed a little crush on him, but that's doesn't effect the situation that a lot if transguys follow me. I don't even post about being asexual, so there's not even lgbt related stuff about me on there.

>>8322451
Like the other guy said, probably trenders. However I don't think there was a particular algorithm that set it off, there's just a lot of transtrenders on IG.
(well, I have IG too, but my bio nor posts say anything about being trans)

>>8322654
Well ok then. That's a bit disappointing I was hoping for some cool answer or something.

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tfw have a fantasy where ftms revert to their female form and get pounded by a gang of big black guys over and over again and slapped at the same time until they say that their a girl.


anybody else have this fantasy?

How important is dysphoria to being trans? I had it bad when I was a teenager. I hated my body and wanted to cut my tits off. I don't feel that way anymore. I accept how I am and can look at myself naked in the mirror without feeling disgusted.
But I still wish I were a dude. I feel depressed and like I'll never have the life I want while being a woman.
Is it still a bad idea to transition because I don't really have dysphoria?

>>8322745
I have a fantasy where I watch you get castrated in the bloodiest and most painful way possible.

anybody else have this fantasy?

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Check out this knife I bought yesterday. Show me your knives

>>8322796

Nope, but i do have a fantasy where you get preggo with a half black baby after that rape, bb :)

>>8322745
>>8322806
Revolting. Good thing I've had hysto.

Stop responding to obvious bait

>>8322815


come on girl i know you want that cream in your pussy anyway

>>8322785
Please respond

>>8322842
no

>>8322785
Sounds like your dysphoria is more related to gender role than physical. I'd be more skeptical if you never felt wrong physically. I don't think you need to have crippling dysphoria to be trans anyway.

>>8322856
Thanks for the reply. I'm just trying to decide if I should see a therapist or suck it up.

>>8322898
See them anyway, their job is to help you sort it out.

>>8322842
>>8322856
Dysphoria is very important in being trans. It doesn't have to be crippling but if you don't have it you aren't trans.
Lots of girls wish they were guys because they think guys are treated better (they aren't) the same way lots of people wish they were rich but there is a difference in wishing you were born a guy and wanting to transition and be a trans guy because of body dysphoria and feeling you are a man.

TL;DR: Don't transition.

>>8322908
This
>>8322974
Trans is going to get harder and harder to nail down and people with your mindset are going to get more and more boggled.

>>8322785
>>8322974
Same though. I don't hate my body I just don't like "being a woman". I have just accepted I will be a guy in my mind but in a girl's body.

>>8322974
Ok, what is that difference?

>>8323251
Not that anon, but the difference is dysphoria.
Everyone has the whole "grass is greener" mindset, or maybe some people just crave change. These aren't really valid reasons to transition because you'll probably change your mind later or realize it wasn't what you really wanted.
Dysphoria doesn't mean "I want to be a guy," it means "I'm not comfortable with myself as a female and everything feels wrong, I feel like I should've been a guy instead"

>>8323155
The definition of trans is not getting harder to nail down, it's stayed exactly the same, other people trying to change it to suit them doesn't boggle me at all.
>>8323205
What exactly don't you like about being a woman? Because having a female body is a big part of that. And what do you consider to be a guy's mind?
>>8323251
Really? Imagine a woman who wishes she were born a man because she believes men are treated better and therefore if she were born as one she would have a better life than she does now but she doesn't have any dysphoria over her body and her transitioning would cause her to feel disgust with her body. Now picture a trans man who believes men are treated the same or worse than women in society but still wants to transition because it doesn't matter to him and how society treats men or trans people because he feels disgust over his feminine body and sees himself as a man. That's basically what I already said but longer because there is no simpler way to describe it and you can't see a difference between these two people? Or do you think all women in the past who wished they were men so they could vote were all trans? Would they have been happy transitioning?

>>8323563
>because you'll probably change your mind later or realize it wasn't what you really wanted.
You don't know that though.

It could happen with dysphoria anyway.

>>8323596
>and her transitioning would cause her to feel disgust with her body.
Well that's not what what anybody said before this post.

>Or do you think all women in the past who wished they were men so they could vote were all trans?
Some women wanted women to get the vote but since when did any wish they were men so they could?

>>8323614
Yeah most things don't have 100% confirmed conclusions but you weigh the risks and benefits, you don't just take testosterone when you don't hate your female body because "hey who knows?"

>>8323701
No, you take it because of the reasons we've already talked about.

>>8323656
>>8323738
Just interested of what you think about this case?
http://planetransgender.blogspot.nl/2013/10/nathan-verhelst-belgian-transgender-man.html

The story of a woman who was constantly told it would have been better if she had been a boy by her mother as her brothers were praised and she herself shunned.

Point is, op get a family member to notify me after you end it.

>>8323656
>Well that's not what what anybody said before this post.
That's why dysphoria matters, that's what anon's been saying.
If you have no qualms with your current body, drastically changing it via T and/or surgery would probably leave you feeling unsettled and like you're in the wrong body.

>>8323858
Not the anon you're responding too, but I'd imagine that having phallo or metoidplasty and then having complications and it being fucked up looking would make even the truest of trutrans consider suicide.

>>8323858
He killed himself because his transition was a failure. If his transition was more successful? Who knows.

>>8323863
The story has changed each post. You don't know transition would leave someone unsettled.

>>8323863
I'm the anon who originally asked how important is dysphoria. I wouldn't say that I have no qualms, just that I've grown to accept it and it isn't a major source of discomfort. I would rather have a male body.

>>8323948
What "story"? And they said "probably". Someone who didn't have dysphoria "probably" would start to get it if they transitioned. Which is what the original anon was saying in regards to risks and benefits.
Or are you implying that has never happened ever?

Anyone else been on t for over several years and not grow that much facial hair?

I know part of it has to do with my race and family (not azn btw) just curious to see who else doesn't grow much hair on their face.

>>8323996
Yeah, I have very little facial or body hair, which is surprising because my dad is pretty hairy. I am destined to be a twink.

How do you guys respond to domination and masculinity ?

I'm a cis gay dude. Reasonably fit. I've always been attracted to submissive guys. I generally get off on being the 'big guy' and the bottom being my bitch. I'm not verse.

How does this sound to FTM ?
I never thought about this with cis gay boys. I just figure it must be different considering you could find that in a hetero relationship.
What's the feels on being a full time bottom do a dominant full time top ??

For Example: I'm the big one. Your the small one. You recognize I will always be stronger and greater than you. A mixture of fear and respect.

>>8324011
my little bro is hairy af but doesn't grow much hair on his face.

>>8324014
Not my thing desu. You'd probably have the best luck with a boymode mtf.

>>8324014
I like being the bottom with men, something about it is taboo for me. but I'm in the closet homo who doesn't want to be in a relationship with guys.

>>8323948
Okay sure except their "breasts" look fine and he looks like any other trans guy but actually I agree her transition was a failure in that she didn't need it in the first place.

>If his transition was more successful? Who knows.
Yes I know you're fond of that phrase and way of thinking.
Here's one, I believe her mother should have like any parent loved her and not made her feel bad for being a girl, and then? Who knows?

>>8324014
>I never thought about this with cis gay boys. I just figure it must be different considering you could find that in a hetero relationship.
What do you mean by this?

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>>8324014
Im dominant as fuck and prefer my partner to also be dominant so we can fight for whose going to be top each time but I also like to be humiliated so I wouldn't mind being bottom most of the time

>>8324046
What ? How and why are you in the closet with liking men ??
Your out as trans right.

>>8323987
>What "story"? And they said "probably".
No, it switched every post.

Are you implying it always happens?

>>8324054
That's irrelevant to the question.

>>8324014
I'm not into it, but that's me. I'm mostly a top except for with dominant girls.
A lot of the FTMs I know personally are bottom bitches to hell, though.

>>8324068
I never thought about the dynamic of me treating a cis gay boy like that. Some seem to like and prefer it.

However, with ftm the experience must be different seeing as how a ftm would/could have experienced this as a cis female in traditional hetero relationship.

>>8324091
Literally point out the posts where anything other than "probably" was not stated or implied or not needed. Please point the post out where it said they will 100% get dysphoria from transitioning. Then the post it changed, then the post it changed again.

>>8324089
out as trans yes. just not ready to come out as bi.

>>8324188
Originally no mention of dysphoria >>8323563 >>8322974

Suddenly a blanket 100% "her transitioning would cause her to feel disgust with her body." >>8323596

And when called out on it, "would probably" >>8323863

Now stop being deliberately obtuse and answer the actual questions.

>>8324091
The question "If his transition was more successful?" that you answered with "who knows."?

As you know it's impossible to answer so I gave you an equally impossible question to compare my opinion against yours in that If we are forming hypothetical situations where the person didn't want to kill themselves I thought the simplest answer would be one where their mother loved them highlighting that I believed they shouldn't have transitioned in the first place whereas you thought of one where their transition wasn't a "failure" because you disagreed.
I'd hardly call it irrelevant.

>>8324263
>If we are forming hypothetical situations where the person didn't want to kill themselves
We're not. You brought up a cherrypicked example of a suicide to try to claim transition is always bad without dysphoria.

Even though you have no evidence he (you're misgendering him) didn't have dysphoria, and even if he didn't, a cherrypicked suicide over a failed transition hardly proves your point.

And when even on your tangent you fail to fake having made your point, you try to change the topic again.

Stop derailing.

>>8324014
I like taking the D. And much prefer the feeling. But if I'm with a girl I like giving the D.

If I stab my balls with a fork and let them bleed will that accurately simulate period?

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>>8324364

>>8324392
Gun would kill me silly, I just want to bleed down to simulate a period, not die.

>>8322785
it sounds like you have dysphoria to me but you've just learned to cope with it (somewhat) at this point in your life. there are even cis women who get breast reduction for cosmetic reasons. imo proprioception for the tiddies is a little less hard-wired and more something you get used to after having them / not having them for a while. but still wishing you didn't have them and were male probably means something. you should talk to a therapist to delve into any deeper feelings or doubts you have regarding this, and talk about differential diagnosis.

>>8324188
>>8324263
Where did you guys vanish to?

>>8324407
A fork wound doesn't accurately simulate a period as periods have chunky bits of flesh pooled in the blood with mucus everywhere. Shooting off your balls is the only answer.

>>8316138
My gf asked me not to get an implant, so I'm not planning to. She's the dom/top in our relationship and doesn't want that to change. She was seeking a trans guy when we started dating and she wasn't really thrilled about the idea of me getting a dick to begin with, but she's come around on that.

>>8324262
Well done on not doing what I asked.

>>8323563 - Not even me

>>8322974 - Falls under not being needed, this was my first comment and I didn't mention that I believe a possible effect of transitioning without dysphoria is dysphoria not because I didn't believe it to be true

>>8323596 - It was an example of a hypothetical woman, that's why I said imagine a woman not this is op and this is what will happen to them for sure or anyone else who transitions without dysphoria.

>>8323863 - You didn't really call anyone out and again not me

tfw when u want meta but ur dick is tiny

>>8324600
Try dht cream maybe?

>>8324593
Well your hypothetical woman is irrelevant because a hypothetical example of something that isn't what's being talked about says nothing about what is.

>>8324288
Stop derailing what? I honestly don't even know what you want from me at this point you just keep accusing me of things.

>>8324641
Then forget your detour and get back to the original posts >>8323656 >>8323738

>>8324605
i'm about 5 months on t so I'm gonna try just being patient first.. feels kinda hopeless tho

>>8324297
same here

>>8324632
Kay, I'm just gonna end here cause I'm bored, you don't have to agree with me

I believe op should not transition because I believe one of the possible effects of transitioning is the gain of dysphoria which I believe to be too great of a risk weighed against the benefits they may receive from transitioning and their current situation to chance it.

>>8324792
>Kay, I'm just gonna end here cause I'm bored, you don't have to agree with me
Cop out.

>>8324792
>I believe op should not transition because...

Wtf are you on about?
OP is just a tttg header...

>>8322785
From what I've seen cases like this have good outcomes after transition
There were mtfs on this board that transitioned completely without "dysphoria" and were very satisfied

A lot of detransitioners on the other hand have strong dysphoria so it doesn't prevent you from regretting it later

That said I think really wanting to be the opposite sex counts as dysphoria, you could easily get a diagnosis of GD with your symptoms under dsm5

A lot of people do this shit where they say they don't have dysphoria because they don't hate their current body then their depression and EDs and whatevers suddenly clear up when they transition and I say that's bullshit

>>8322785
>>8325395
What I'm trying to say is, think if you really don't have dysphoria (ie. discomfort with your gender) or just think you don't, like
>i don't mind my vag and not having a dick doesn't bother me
Yeah that's no dysphoria
>i don't mind my vag but i hate not having a penis and it's causing me a lot of discomfort
That's GD even though the first claim matches the previous one, see a pattern?

It's not just hating what you have, you can also hate that you don't have what you want

It can also go in the opposite direction like
>i want to be male but body hair disgusts me eww
>i want to be male and don't mind not being hairy but also don't care if i grow some

It's not just about your body but it's good to think about it since you can't easily revert the changes
That said when you give people what they want they're usually satisfied

Social transitioning is somewhat reversible on the other hand so just pretend to be a dude on the internet if you're not sure, you loose nothing and gain experience

How do I explain what being trans is to a friend? He supports me but he said he doesn't know much about the topic at all, and I said I had gender dysphoria but I want him to know more. Any good videos/articles that explain it well without being snowflakey?

How come my mom gets to look like a fucking linebacker with huge hands while I, the tranny, have a small head, small hands, and a weak jaw?

What can I do to make my face look more masculine?

>>8326600
How do you cope when everything sucks and nothing makes you happy?

>>8326910
Didn't mean to reply, sorry.

>>8326910
You keep getting up everyday until you can't anymore, which is when you kill yourself.

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>>8326910
disassociation and setting goals
go for your interests and try to do something big, get excited for it, treat it like you would a long term relationship except the relationship is you and your interest. also sleep a lot and play vidya but not too much.

I cope by learning languages like old norse, gothic, swedish, norwegian, and icelandic, and now Im somewhat making a video game. This is currently what makes me not want to anhero, I even sometimes forget that I was ever an XX-chromosome person because of the people that I interact with on a daily basis because of my interests.

>>8324920
Nah it was late and I was going to bed so I decided to just sum up my opinion. What's the real cop out is only mentioning the first part of my comment to make it seem like you won when you completely ignored the main point.

And I never said you had to agree with me just understand what I was trying to get across.

>>8325364
Yeah I said op in a previous comment as in original question asker when it made more sense to and forgot to change for that one.

What do you do when you don't pass and can't start t for another five months, but your best guy friend tells you he wants to kiss you?
What can I do in the meantime, I really care about him but hate that he thinks about me this way.

>>8326600
Constantly chew gum and mean mug. Warning: This will alienate people and make you seem like a complete tool.
>>8326910
Drugs

Two quick non-trolling questions

Why is F to M so rare among trans gendered people and do many F to M's go back?

>>8327639
Stop washing and be constantly covered in dirt, food, grease and oil.

>>8327739
>Why is F to M so rare among trans gendered people
They're not, they just pass better and even if they don't nobody considered them as bad a freak as an MTF.

>and do many F to M's go back?
MTFs do too but FTMs are more likely to turn radfem and everyone likes hearing about women and from feminists more than the opposite.

>>8327739
ftm pass easier apparently so it seems like we're less but in reality we're probably as common as mtf. I've never seen or heard of ftm going back but probably because they were transtrenders, same with mtf.

>>8327639
tell him you're not interested

trust me, if you're hoping he can see past what his eyes currently see once you go on t and his feelings will transform into dude-fancying feelings, it ain't gonna happen

you're probably best off delaying romantic entanglements until the you other people see better matches the you you want to present to the world. i personally recommend anonymous casual sex and making weed your boyfriend now.

>>8327739
I think it's due to the way society treats feminine men and masculine women. It's harder to realise your ftm when society doesn't make you question or see a "problem" with your masculinity and jealousy of men whereas the opposite is true for mtfs.

For the second question I don't know but I think the number is pretty low for either mtfs or ftms. Maybe a little more for the reason I mentioned above of difficulty separating butch and ftm.

>>8327757
So currently at my LGBT group at my university there's more MtF than gay men, and there were only two FtMs who both de-transitation after a few years

>>8327778
cool, my lgbt(trans oriented) group has 7 ftm and 2 really old hon mtfs and 1 passing mtf, none of which have detransitioned to my knowledge.

>>8327766
What did you mean by the second paragraph? He knows I'm not interested that way but we're pretty close.
I'd be fine with him liking me even, if I passed as a guy and if he liked me AS A GUY. Also he doesn't know anything about transitioning and thinks the only step is "getting the surgery" so as soon as I pass I'm just gonna tell him I have a peen.
What can I do in the meantime though?

>>8327807
>I'd be fine with him liking me even, if I passed as a guy and if he liked me AS A GUY.

this is what i mean, i'm not saying it's impossible but you might as well wait for hell to freeze over. it's hard to explain until you've experienced it, but people who knew you pre-transition are almost never going to see you the same way as someone who met you after you started passing

if you really want to get on the dating train, i guess aim for people who are cool with and understand trans stuff. this is often other trans people, but i dated a trans girl for 2 years and at one point she told me she'd never see me as a real guy, so you can never be sure.

>>8327845
C-can you tell me more about this? Obviously I'd expect relatives or people maybe who've known me since birth to say they can't see me as a real guy, but I met this friend last year.
I think I'm fairly androgynous now, definitely not super femme or anything. So you think he'll never actually see me as a dude?
Why not, especially if I pass 100% and don't show any signs of acting female?

>>8327909
is he straight?

Who has the superior mental masculinity?

Ftm or violently repressing mtf compensating their dysphoria with the most stereotypical masculine activities hardened by years of self hate

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>>8328214
why not both

>>8328214
Every lesbian (not bi) girl I've ever met is more masculine than ftms and mtfs, especially from their personality. Even the femme ones.

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>tfw trans
>tfw like the smell of cis man poo

>>8328313
wtf is with that?

>>8328362
An evolutionary mechanism to deter straight men?

>>8328380
But it attracts the submissive beta kind of men most likely to be into lesbians anyway.

>>8328313
Lesbians to me always seem "masculine" in that they can act aggressive and like masculine activities and dress similarly but it's still different from your average man.

>>8328362
an evolutionary mechanism to attract women desu

>>8328319
noooo why here? I thought I was safe here

>>8328313
>>8328362
Non stealth trans men are more likely to be more feminine than those who aren't but the same isn't true for lesbians so it's confirmation bias maybe.

>>8328502
You're right. "Aggressive" is the word I was thinking of for lesbians, not masculine.

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What do you guys think of the name Andy (don't like this one desu) or Adam? Any other good A names? I want a common name but it has to begin with A.

>>8328609
>adrian
>andrew (fancy andy)
>alan
>aaron (hardmode)
>axl rose
>aethelred the unready

that's all i got. what's your year of birth/cultural heritage? those can be helpful deciding factors for searching up a name for a man of your background

>>8328609
Aiden

On a more serious note, I did notice there's a lot of girls named Aiden/some other spelling variation. Why are transmemes picking a name that's so deceptively feminine?

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>>8328319

Is it retarded that I made a postcard to come out? I didn't want to look like a ween while coming out (I get too nervous when talking about anything feeling-related, shaking, stuttering, crying...), so I wrote my feelings down in a postcard and painted it with watercolours. It felt good to write my feelings down and open up a little bit, but I haven't given the card to anyone yet because I'm afraid it just looks dumb.

howbig is good sho9ulder measure
with an Innches

>>8328628
>year of birth
I was born in the 90s.
>heritage
Irish

I was skimming through some sites earlier that listed the top 50 or so birth names in the 90s. I completely spaced out that Alan is a name that exists.

>>8328824
If you're not pushing 48 inches across, don't even bother transitioning

>bf said he would no longer want to date if I transition
oh ok nevermind then ._.

>>8328609
I like both. Adam sounds more youthful to me and Andy sounds older.
>>8328805
Post it. It sounds like a cool idea.

>>8328824
It's less about shoulder measure and more about shoulder to waist ratio.

>>8328805
that's pretty cute, as long as you got the feels out you accomplished something

i'm similarly afflicted, when i came out to my mum i just left my diagnosis letter from my doc on the table for her to stumble upon. it did the trick

>>8328893
here's one then; angus

>>8329002
>>bf said he would no longer want to date if I transition
>oh ok nevermind then ._.
Time to get a new bf, anon.

>>8329126
but this is my first one.
i'm 27 and tired of being alone

>>8329161
Don't date someone just to have someone. It's not worth it in the long run, look at all the unhappy married couples in their 40s+.

>>8328118
Yes, he's straight.
I want to know more about people not taking you seriously as a guy despite (assuming) you pass as one.

>>8329293
Maybe he can be happy staying female if he has a boyfriend who lets him indulge in his masculine side.

>>8309053

New to /ftmg/, I hope you all don't mind.
I wanted to ask a few questions as I'm a little curious - excuse me for being ignorant and sorry, in advance, if I cause offence (please correct me).

(1) Do many of you genuinely, really want a penis? If so, is this simply for acquiring the aesthetic that's commonly associated with biological males, or is it for sexual purposes, or both?

(3) If you had a fully functioning penis - as currently perceived by the majority as that belonging to biological males - would you adopt a different sexual role than the one you currently have?

(3) What roles do you adopt sexually, for those of who you are attracted to men (be it cis or other ftm or whatever else)?

(4) As a bisexual dude who isn't interested in dick (i.e. a total top), would I struggle to attract FtMs?

(5) Do you dislike having your biological vagina touched in a sexual manner by your [potential] partner? Do you adopt a similar sexual role to that of gay men, and enjoy anal (that's not to say all gay and bi men enjoy anal or want it or even have it)?

(6) Finally, do you have a 'type'? Especially among gay men, there are categories of men (i.e. twinks, otters, cubs, bears, chubs, superchubs, daddies, etc.). Personally, I hate labels, and don't think we should define ourselves by porn categories, so describing your ideal male or depicting them in picture format would be ideal for responding to this, but it's up to you.

I hope you don't mind. I'm intrigued and think an FtM bf is something I ought to aspire to given my obscure preferences but I'm willing to accept I'm wrong.

>>8329344
1. Yes, both
3. i'd be more comfortable receiving oral, but otherwise probably not
3 (2). exclusively bottom, cuz you know, no dick
4. depends on the person. I'd be fine with that.
5. I really dislike receiving oral. Too much focus on that area. I don't mind taking dick so much.
6. my bf is sort of chub/bear, so I guess that

>>8329344
>Biological vagina
What about GMO vaginas? They deserve love too

Shit aside..
1- I'd like to but surgeries are horrific and I'd rather keep a hole than having my arm stitched on my crotch
2- I do not have a sexual role because I've never developed sexual attraction. I'd probably have an easier time jerking off though.
3- I've never experienced sexual attraction in my 20+ years of life so I couldn't tell you
4- Most FtMs seem to be bisexual, so you wouldn't have trouble
5- The idea of sex with another person is something I haven't ever entertained. Test made me hornier but all I can do is jack it. So in a way I don't have a strong opinion about vagina-touching.
6- I like feminine people aesthetically speaking (women, trans women, femboys) and I don't think masculine people are aesthetic in any way. So my type is the female archetype.

>>8329344
1. Yes. It's because I experience it in a phantom limb way and it creates discomfort to not actually have one. It's also for sexual purposes.

2. Yes. I'm bi and prefer to be sub with men, dom with women, but the latter isn't really an option.

4. It depends on where you are. On these boards you wouldn't have any luck, but in certain LGBT spaces you'll find it's more common that the guys have little to no bottom dysphoria.

5. Personally, I don't know (because I've never had sex), but I think it would be fine most of the time. Occasionally I might be feeling depressed/dysphoric and not go for it.

6. I hate labels too, but I gotta use them for search features on porn sites, and ngl "fat daddy" typically does the best job. I would describe my ideal male as literally Stephen Fry.

I think most trans people will laugh at you if you say they "intrigue" you. If you really want to go about this fetish the right way, pretend you don't give any fucks that they're trans, and try to figure out at a reasonable pace (don't ask them too early in the relationship) how their bottom dysphoria is so you know if they're even up for that.

>>8328893
Andrew
Anthony
Alexander
Austin
Aaron
Alvin

Thanks for the responses guys. These are useful and interesting to read. I guess I need to get hairy and big.

>>8329344
>>8329394

Ugh, it's late here, for the sake of clarification, just replace the first (3) with (2), lel.

Thanks for the response anon.

>>8329404

> GMO vaginas

Thanks for that anon, I lel'd. Can I ask, do you identify as asexual then? Or simply biromantic, or..?

>>8329405

Well, I wouldn't say it's a fetish as I'm open to various types of people, and don't really have a strict type, it's just my preferences that made me think FtMs might me ideal. I get too much attention from the type of gay men I don't want to attract, and the ones I like aren't compatible with my preferences. I've never known any biological females, intersex, MtFs, or FtMs be attracted to me either. My sister did recently tell me that when we were in a 'queer' bar (a lot of LGBT people there but mostly trans and I've never seen so many in my life in a small space so it was an experience for me) that I as getting looks (in a complimentary way) but feel like I need to work on myself before making any approaches.

>>8329344
1: Yes, both aesthetically and sexually. I don't use my junk anyway, I might as well have equipment that I can use.
2: Well, yeah. I'm mostly top/dominant and it's hard to do that with a hole or plastic. If I had a functioning dick, I'd be much more confident in sexual situations.
3: Not into men, for the most part. I figure if I did ever get with a guy, I'd be a strict top. I can't see myself bottoming to one.
4: Nah, if anything FtMs would be pretty ideal for you, I think.
5: Yeah, referencing my answers for 1 and 2. I'm fine with clit stimulation since I do want to get off at some point, but going inside does absolutely nothing for me. I'd be willing to try ass stuff, but I haven't yet.
6: In the rare case that I do fuck a guy, it'd be a twink. Otherwise, I'm mostly into girls, specifically either really cute submissive girls or rough dominant girls.

There was a picture I had ages ago that perfectly illustrates what kind of guy I'm into, but of course I didn't save it.

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>>8329344
1 yes, both
2 probably wouldn't change
3 switch dom
4 maybe, maybe not
5 I don't know, I'm a virgin
6 long haired guys with nice jawlines, non passing mtfs, and masculine girls, pic related

>>8329293
>>8329342
yah he will acknowledge me as a guy and use male pronouns when it's just the two of us but he doesn't want me to change my body. i'll take it, i mean it has to be an improvement i think.

>>8329344
>1. yes, although current surgery methods are not up to my personal requirements. it is because of dysphoria-if i want to fuck someone, i can just strap it on.
>2. with guys i find myself bottoming more simply because mechanically speaking it's the easiest route but topping is fun too. i dunno, if i had a genuine functioning penis i would most likely go and find a willing vagina to put it in first of all.
>3. it says vers on my grindr profile, but vers bottom is probably more like it.
>4. that's probably some guys' ideal man. can't really give a definitive answer since everyone is different. i'm not picky personally, give me an open mind and something nice to look at and i'll be riding that dick before you can say jiminy cricket.
>5. i can deal with it, personally, but mostly because i'm just a very horny man. anal is alright, i'm up for it sometimes.
>6. see ^4.

>>8329514
no way dude

you deserve someone who likes the real you

not a fake version of yourself you have to project to keep him happy

your medical needs come first

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>>8329344
>(1) Do many of you genuinely, really want a penis?

I cannot speak for others but I, for one, really want a functioning biological penis. I want to blow a load down someone's throat, or splooge ropes of cum on my own belly. Not feasible with current science though.

>(2) If you had a fully functioning penis - as currently perceived by the majority as that belonging to biological males - would you adopt a different sexual role than the one you currently have?

Yeah... I would actually pursue sex with other people, not just masturbate until my arm goes numb.

>(3) What roles do you adopt sexually, for those of who you are attracted to men (be it cis or other ftm or whatever else)?

Right now I would have to bottom, anally, because I have had a Hysterectomy (no womb), oophorectomy (no ovaries), Metoidioplasty (microdick from the clit), scrotoplasty (ballsack from labia majora... no prosthetic balls tho, just empy sack), with vaginectomy to seal off my innards.

I do not have enough material to penetrate a partner, and no "bonus hole" anymore. Just my arsehole in my hairy butt.

Shame really, I would love to make a fella beg. Betas and masochists are fun.

1/2

>>8329463
Wait, is that Jobel?

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>>8329608
yeah

>>8329514
That's fucking retarded dude. You never put someone else's needs above your own no matter how lonely you feel. You're just gonna end up fucking yourself over in the long run.

>>8329594
How big is your meta? Would you consider using one of those "attachment" type things that any guy with a micropenis can use? I'm starting t soon, considering meta unless something better comes out, or gonna just off myself lol.

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>>8329344
>(4) As a bisexual dude who isn't interested in dick (i.e. a total top), would I struggle to attract FtMs?

If you treat them respectfully, like a dude, and can work within their individual limits you should be fine.

>(5) Do you dislike having your biological vagina touched in a sexual manner by your sex partner?

I have hangups because I got rid of the girl parts but am sort of... stuck in the middle. I dont like to touch my parts myself, I havent let anyone else touch them either.

>Do you adopt a similar sexual role to that of gay men, and enjoy anal (that's not to say all gay and bi men enjoy anal or want it or even have it)?

Had some anal play before surgeries, enjoyed it, partner isnt down for it though... two sadists dont play well in bed together. We need a bitch to share.

>(6) Finally, do you have a 'type'? Especially among gay men, there are categories of men (i.e. twinks, otters, cubs, bears, chubs, superchubs, daddies, etc.). Personally, I hate labels, and don't think we should define ourselves by porn categories, so describing your ideal male or depicting them in picture format would be ideal for responding to this, but it's up to you.

Overall... I like dark hair, dark eyes. Natural dark red heads are nice, and I will tolerate light eyes there. Blond with blue eyes turns me off... blue eyes in general put me off cuz they look like my ma's eyes.

For guys, specifically... I like more weathered features. Men aged 30+... twinks are boring. I like stubble... heh... guys that look a bit like my dad, I guess.

>>8329630
I didnt get much growth on T, since I was already at elevated T levels before HRT so I do not think it would do jack shit for me.

Everyone is different tho.

>>8329344
1: yes for all of those but the current options for bottom surgery dont seem realistic enough to me
2: id probably top more
3: vers
4: dont know, personally id be cool with it though
5: im ok with it, i dont really like having it there but since im stuck with it for now i might as well use it. anal's fine too
6: big tall muscular guys are ideal but as long as i like someone enough then i dont really care about appearance

>>8329619
He's my fucking hero.

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>>8329002
>Post it. It sounds like a cool idea.
I was about to not do it, but it doesn't matter anyway. It's in spanish though, it'd read like "congrats on the new baby boy" or something. I was sleepy when I wrote it and don't have any 300g paper left, so I ain't redoing it.

>>8329028
Yeah, I was planning on doing that. Put it in whoever I wanna show it to's purse or bag and wait until they see it.

>>8329344
>(3) If you had a fully functioning penis - as currently perceived by the majority as that belonging to biological males - would you adopt a different sexual role than the one you currently have?
Tbqh I'd probably top a lot for a while, then I'd revert back to being mostly bottom or being versatile.

>(5) Do you dislike having your biological vagina touched in a sexual manner by your [potential] partner? Do you adopt a similar sexual role to that of gay men, and enjoy anal (that's not to say all gay and bi men enjoy anal or want it or even have it)?
I only dislike it if I realize what's actually happening. I tend to just close my eyes and enjoy it, but if I start thinking "... wait, this isn't right. Oh right, I have a vagina and not a dick" I get really turned off. I personally don't enjoy anal, though I've tried it; it just feels awkward and makes me wish I had a dick so I could have a prostate and like it.

>>8329344
>1
I want a penis because it would make me 100% male (in my eyes) regardless of what chromosomes I have. If I had a real penis I wouldn't have to overcompensate as much for being small or feminine looking as I would finally be "real" and not a knock-off like most of scoiety sees me. Not like society is looking at my nonexistent dick or anything, but it would give me peace of mind. It's hard to explain accurately.
>2
Yeah, I would actually have sex.
>3
I'd suck a cis dude's dick I guess. I might be open to be dating another ftm but I think it would give me more dysphoria than anything else and so i wouldn't want to hurt him. Like I would never want to touch his vag. I don't know though... maybe I'd change my mind about it?

I'm a virgin and I don't want anyone to touch the axe wound. If there's someone out there into that contact me pls. I prefer girls, which includes mtfs too.
>4
I definitely wouldn't like that.
>5
If I was a gay dude with a penis I would definitely prefer frotting over anything else. Assholes are kind of gross, no matter who the owner.
>6
femboys, daddies, don't really know what the other categories are besides twinks and bears. Are otters the more average body type? I would be into that.

File: 13620886_1101738589894141_1231492816142098000_n.jpg (37KB, 480x439px)

37KB, 480x439px

>>8329732
I fall asleep to his full streams every night and try to get to his live streams as often as possible.

>>8329774
i think it's very cute

>>8329782
>>8329782
>>8329782
>>8329782

>>8326910
Find someone just as negative as you. So you can both bitch and moan about everything without judgement.

>>8329788
I only managed to get to a live stream once. It was FMV Friday, I think.

>>8329443
> do you identify as asexual then
Yeah, I mean its not that I identify as such, I simply don't experience erotic attraction and\or feel the urge to engage in sexual acts. What's biromantic anyway?

>>8317237
I'm an MtF w BPD, be my friend desu,
I lurk this thread for info for my FtM bf, that and it's so much more chill than MtFg, so more transguy friends would be kewl

arbitrarygrill#8391 on discord or arbitrarydegeneracy at Gmail dot com for email