Am I ftm trans or butch lesbian?

>>8271457
If you don't feel the need to get a hysterectomy, cut your tits off, shoot T and grow a kick ass beard, I'm not really seeing the trans. There's nothing wrong with being a masculine woman.

>>8271457
If you don't hate your female body and only "wouldn't mind" being male, then don't transition. Transition is too much of an ordeal for something you don't very seriously want to the point your life will be significantly worse without it.

Why do you kinda like being called "she" now?

Gender roles suck. Find a social circle that doesn't push you into roles you don't want. For your family, if they try to make you more feminine, keep saying you identify as male. You don't need to transition to claim that, you can say you're a non-transitioning ftm.

>I heard stuff on tumblr like "if you question that you're trans, you probably are"
I think that's aimed at people with a more internal kind of dysphoria than your social and physical dysphoria.

>and "its normal for dysphoria to increase after coming out".
Possibly true but that doesn't mean much. If your dysphoria hasn't increased and even decreased (judging by the pronouns thing) then even less reason for you to transition.

At the end of the day the line between ftm and butch lesbian is pretty fuzzy.

>>8271457
If you don't mind being referred to, looking like, or treated like female then you shouldn't transition. There will be irreversible side effects of T and you'll never be a real man. It's also not garenteed that you'll be more confident considering it's more of how you were raised and depends less on your sex. There are plenty of men who have low self-esteem. You may have BDD if you dislike your body and don't understand why.

>>8271482
>There's nothing wrong with being a masculine woman.
I just wish everyone else felt that way. I'm not sure I'd even be going through this if I was encouraged to go against gender roles

>>8271582
>If your dysphoria hasn't increased and even decreased
>Why do you kinda like being called "she" now?
My dysphoria has fluctuated. As a little kid it wasn't even there. I stated to think I was trans and it increased. And now its been slowly decreasing

And I really don't know why I like being called she now. Maybe its because I'm used to my family calling me he and I want a change

>>8277053
Not meant in a condescending way, how old are you? Because right now you only seem to have exposure to your family mainly who do seem into traditional gender roles but getting out into the rest of the world you'll find a lot of people who are comfortable around masculine women. Maybe try exposing yourself to that world and communities of gender non conforming people (you can introduce yourself as a woman) and you might start feeling more comfortable expressing yourself in that way.

>>8277108
Actually, I did do this. I'm 19 and I went away to college for a semester. I presented as a butch lesbian there and ftm at home. That's actually when I though I'd be ok living as a gender non conforming person instead of trans.

>>8277053
honestly as a lesbian masculine women are totally my type so just do you senpai

>>8277229
aishiteru anon-chan~

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I'd also like other people's opinions here. I feel like I'm living a lie, should I tell all the people I came out to that I'm not trans? How would I tell them?

>>8271482
Yeah I'm with this Anon.

It's ok to be GNC. Most people will take that more favourably than you being trans as well.

>>8281841
>Most people will take that more favourably than you being trans
Surprising, they don't. Ive actually gotten more acceptance as ftm, bc I'm just seen as a typical guy. Which just makes the thought of living as a gnc woman seem difficult

>>8277070
You may have missed the fact that its decreasing because you're accepted as a man? That is a thing that reduces it, you know.

I mean, you might just be a gnc woman but this makes me think otherwise. Take T for a month or two and see how you feel.

>>8283035
The whole HRT trial period is not really an option for FTMs the way it is for MTFs.
Even a couple of months could easily produce permanent effects like facial hair growth that would suck if OP decides they're actually just butch.

>>8281740
have you tried talking to a professional?

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>>8283059
>HRT trial period is not really an option for FTMs
I wish I could become male for a day or two just to know if I like it.
I DONT KNOW WHAT TO DO IM SO CONFUSED

>>8283035
>its decreasing because you're accepted as a man
That is a thing to consider

>>8283167
I have a therapist. She told me upfront that shes not an expert on transgender stuff but she has other trans patients.

I told her about all this stuff and she suggested that I might be "androgynous" aka non binary

I think I could fit the description of non binary but I'm not sure how I feel about all this multiple genders thing

>>8283516
if I were you I'd just stick with being a cis girl as opposed to transitioning
do you feel the need to transition at all? or do you wish you had a dick or wish you didn't have boobs? is that something that comes up frequently in your thinking?

>>8283532
>do you feel the need to transition at all?
I used to, but not so much anymore. My dysphoria kinda just went away?

Also, I'm already out as trans to my family. If I did decide to live as GNC and not trans, how would I tell them?

>>8283516
>but I'm not sure how I feel about all this multiple genders thing
That's just labels. Find the life you want to lead and them choose labels to suit. Don't worry about whether you want to call yourself something other than man/woman or just call yourself a boyish woman or something else within the binary until after you've found a lifestyle you want.

>>8283579
"I've thought about it and decided I don't need to transition/identify as a man to be comfortable with myself and to be able to know I don't have to life as a gender conforming woman."

If you aren't sure, you can do a trial on hormones. I was a lot less depressed after t. You always have the option to stop taking t. I know a couple ftms who de-transitioned. Just put off surgery until you are sure. The only thing I miss is nipple sensation, and you'll most likely lose it after top surgery. This transition is fully up to you.

>>8285711
>If you aren't sure, you can do a trial on hormones.
>You always have the option to stop taking t.
HRT is a much bigger deal when it comes to permanent changes for FtMs than MtFs.

>>8285722
Not if they opt out early.

>>8271457
Anon, I was LITERALLY in the same boat as you, but I got over it in a year or two, please try to live your life as a lesbian, it'll be easier, I know it may seem like you get accepted more as a man but they'll come around, it's just a different way of being a girl, I'm 100% like you and I recommend you stop, it's for the better.

>>8271457
>>8285937
Also me.
I know you are feeling confused, but butches experience a type of 'gender dysphoria' too... What do you think drives people to be so fiercely GNC even when they know people are gonna have a hard time accepting them? There are so few positive (or even just non offensive) cultural stories/fictional portrayals about us that we don't even know how to feel about ourselves. Even using the word 'butch' is difficult for me. It sounds so dirty and antiquated. I have started applying it to myself only this year (I am 31). Tomboy or androgenous work too. Please don't take hormones unless you feel it is somehow the absolute last resort. There are many health risks even when taking bio identical hormones. Plus, girls think butches are some sort of dying breed now. You're young, just go have fun with that.

>>8285937
>I got over it in a year or two
What made you get over it? Do you ever wish you could transition now days?
>>8286330
>butches experience a type of 'gender dysphoria' too
I've actually heard this before from radfems, but I was skeptical cause you know, they're radfems.