>mom yells at me that I need to go outside, threatens to shut

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>mom yells at me that I need to go outside, threatens to shut off Internet if I don't
>have no choice, have to go out
>bored out of my mind with nothing to do, eventually wind up in a park
>remember in cartoons old ladies are always feeding pigeons, decide to give it a try
>get some bread and sit at a park bech, start throwing crumbs around
>no pigeons around here, just crows
>fuck it, I'll feed them anyway, what could go wrong?
>was actually kind of relaxing, made it a daily routine
>more and more crows showed up every day, eventually a HUGE murder of crows showed up waiting for me at the park daily to feed them multiple loaves of bread
>became the crow guy
>some roastie got mad because the crows shit everywhere and scared her snotty kids
>one day sent Chad to stop me
>Chad starts yelling at me, tells me I need to leave and not come back
>tell him it's a public park and I have the right to be here
>he gets even more belligerent, shoves me over and steals my bread
>big mistake
>the crows are mad now
>start pecking the shit out of him, one or two even start dive bombing him
>Chad freaks out, drops the bread and runs away like a little bitch
>caw caw motherfucker
>roastie is toasty and they both leave while she yells at him
>bring a box of donuts to my crow-bros the next day to thank them


Go and feed some birds, legbutts. They are truly bro-tier.