Cis LesGen

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First for vibrators are better than people

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>5th time in a row in recent news

Oh no, OP. It's you that wants me.

>>8029813
And people say romance is dead.

My girlfriend went out with her boyfriend again tonight. She promised she would break up with him, but so far it's not happening. She'll come home with a vagina smelling like cum and I'll pretend I don't notice.

Feels bad.

>>8029827
ditch her

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>clg

>>8029827
That's just disgusting. Have some self-respect and dump her.

>>8029831
>>8029836
She's the prettiest girl to ever show interest in me in my life, in this shitty hickville I call a home. My luck so far has been depressed emo girls or obese ones with mediocre hygiene. I adore this girl, and would please her even if his cum was dripping out of her.

>>8029871
I feel no pity for you, only disgust.

>>8029871
That's pretty much why I said "have some self-respect". I'd rather be alone all my life than be with a girl who's fucking guys on the side.

>>8029883
>>8029882
Enjoy being lonely then.

She'll come home and we'll cuddle for hours and watch TV half the night and sleep curled up together, which makes it all worth it.

>>8029891
If you say so anon. It's your life.
Enjoy being a literal cuck, I guess.

>>8029871
>being a side bitch
You know she'll dump you sooner or later.

>>8029900
>using guy words
Disregarded

>>8029905
Then it'll be the best year of my sexual and emotional life so far, because there's only so many times you can let a fat girl lay on top of you before you question what you're doing with your life.

>>8029891
Enjoy guzzling cum out of your "girlfriend's" used vagina. You obviously like the taste.

>>8029935
At least I'll have a vagina to lick.

Sharing panties, owning a cat and letting her use your computer are signs that your relationship will survive no matter. Marry her!

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Why is there so much racism in the lesbian community?

I REALLY WANT A JEWISH GIRLFRIEND!!!

Tall Brown haired blue eyed Jewish women are my weakness

>>8029959
Who likes shitskins? They have their own culture which is pretty much the opposite of ambitious and so few of them are properly educated.

>>8029827
What's the entirety of the situation with her? You're in a poly relationship? She's closet gay?

Obviously she's bi and you're not but we need more info

>>8029960
Short, black-haired jewish women with pale skin are my weakness.

The curlier the hair, the better. Unf.

>>8029965
I like all kinds of women, their skin color doesn't dictate whether or not I'll like them, their personality does. And I wouldn't mind tasting some chocolate if you know what I mean.

>>8029955
Does it count as sharing panties if she picks the wrong pair after a night of passionate lovemaking?
Not that that ever happened to me but I curious.

>>8029970
>tfw read the Anne Frank diary as a little girl myself
>totally fell for her

>>8029935
>>8029905
>>8029883
>>8029882
>>8029836
>>8029831
>>8029966

Did you really fall for that bait? It's obviously a guy. They post about that fantasy all the time. No lesbian is that dumb and would post about being that dumb - it's even written descriptively with a male's fantasy. Ignore those when you see them.

>>8029965
But when they are it's hot as fuck.

>>8029959
Most White people are just incredibly racist either openly or out of ignorance
I generally don't date white women for that reason although I make exceptions

>>8030005
That seems pretty racist, anon

>>8029970
Mmmmm
I like those too
I prefer tall bc I'm tall but Sarah Silverman is def one of my ideal waifus

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>>8029803
Post pucci, fagget.

>tfw nicotine withdrawal

>>8030055
>tfw pussy withdrawal

>>8030062
What's the cure, doc?

>>8030011
>sarah silverman
Her personality just ruins it for me.

>>8030062
>tfw never addicted to pussy in the first place

>>8030070
>What's the cure, doc?
A girlfriend I guess. But I haven't had one in forever.

>>8030072
>tfw addicted to own pussy since I was 14

>>8030078
Shit, how'd that happen?

>"I do like you but I feel trapped with my baby daddy... I don't know what to do."
Do I kms now or ?

>>8030091
Kill yourself for weak bait

>>8030091
>bishit
We tried to warn you anon

>>8030086
This dude's feelings got hurt in my low-key pursuit of his lesbo older sister and spilled the beans to get back at me because he feels I led him on in some way.

I need someone to call me mommy. I've had had a very bad day and want to take it on submissive girls.

>>8030144
Wow that's shitty, sorry to hear that.

>>8030080
>addicted to own pussy since I was 14
Excuse me?

>>8030144
Fucking retarded. Sorry anon. We'll hopefully see you through the worst of it. Brightside is you aren't in the middle east and it's not ten years ago.

>>8030158
>Excuse me
Masturbation joke

>>8030150
listen to this:
https://www.reddit.com/r/gonewildaudio/comments/5vdiai/f4f_mommy_i_dont_wanna_go_to_class_improv_no/

Have you been a good lesbian today?

>>8030210
What makes a good lesbian?

>>8030155
It does suck even more so because I was somewhat successful with his sister but he threw such a fucking fit she decided it would probably be better if we didn't hang out.

I've only had a crush on her for the better part of a fucking decade and the first time I ever masturbated was the night she dried me off with a towel after swimming their pool.

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If a hot&drunk straight girl wanted to make out with you, would you do it?

>>8030226
That sounds really shitty yeah. Can you at least talk to him about it, so he understands that he's fucked up. Or, failing that, kick him hard in the balls.

Also that's really pretty cute. I sure hope you waited with that until she finished drying you off, though.
Or maybe not.

>>8030252
Yeah sure. Making out is fun.

>>8030252
No. But I'd watch her make out with another straight chick. Then I'd get head from a gay woman.

>>8030226
Truly. The y chromosome ruins everything.

>>8030226
That's serious revenge-worthy levels of heartbreak due to some guy's douchery.

Although, i'm sorry to say, she can't have been all that cool considering she used someone else's fucked up tantrum as an excuse to distance herself from you.

That's not the kind of person you want to end up getting serious with, probably.

>>8029981
>man accusing other people of being a man

wew lad

>>8030252

I wanna say no, but now that I think of it I did end up doing that at a club a couple years back. And then I ended up making out with her boyfriend too because why the fuck not.

>>8029945
At that point it is legit not worth it. As others have said have some selfrespect. Not sure what else you expected to hear posting about liking a cum drenched vag here.

>>8030588
You people are stupid. Typical men/queens. You can't understand the emotional bond of women.

I've put up with far too many men in my life, a damp vag is not a deal breaker. A moron with a dick for brains is, however.

>>8029914
>getting cucked makes up the best year of your sexual and emotional life so far

>>8030607
More man terms.

I'm starting to think there aren't any other women actually here.

>>8030614
you are literally a cuckquean. i don't understand how you're letting this happen. if you're only fulfilling her enough that she has to search for side dish sexual encounters, then it's not going to work out.

for christ sakes, have some dignity. aren't you jealous at all?

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So gf is super stressed about money etc. Still haven't found a new job yet. She is signing us up to be election officers, and cat sitters, and all these other odd jobs haha. I feel so bad because she sees it as my fault. (however I am still paying all my own bills and my portion of the rent.) She just gets really stressed with money and had a lot going on her own already.

Anyway pic related is some "I don't have money any more" wine to try and forget about things. On the bright side she still wants to try a fooling around tonight so the wine was a bit of pre lube for the whole thing. Wish me luck clg I might finally break our cold streak tonight!

(I am working on some more art. It is a pretty detailed picture of this barbarian looking chick holding a bow. I want to work in /clg/ somewhere but not exactly sure how other than a sign or something in the background. You might just have to accept this one without time stamp. *Idea!* Or I could do it on other paper and overlay it like a time-stamp! yep that is the plan!)

>>8030598
>>8030614
Relationship is doomed. Props for sticking with things so far but honestly girl, I would never accept being in your position. (and at this point I would accept being a kept girl for money...)

>>8030637
Of course I'm jealous, I fucking hate that he touches her at all, but what's my fucking choice? There are less than five thousand people in my town. It's conservative. I've known less girls like me than I can count on two hands. I'm trapped in a shit job making shit money while shit men whistle at me, scrounging together every dollar to try to go to school the year after next, because guess what, it's not actually happening next year as planned because shit happens.

I may be trapped here but I'm not going to be lonely.

>>8030747
i would rather be lonely than torture myself over my girlfriend screwing around, but, you know, that's just me.

have you talked to her about how this makes you feel?

>>8030014
If you did not only would it be on a blue board, but you would be the first to ever offer up a pucci pic as sacrifice to the clg matrons I think.

>>8030771
no

i convinced myself she does it so her dad doesn't find out but I don't want to know the real reason

>>8030734
Good luck anon, eat the pussy like groceries.

>>8030780
That honestly seems kinda sad.

>>8030780
wow, anon. if you ARE going to stay together, i would suggest that you don't put in such an emotional investment, for your own good.

>>8030793
It's only sad when she's not here. Like tonight.

She lives here. We're roommates. There are two bedrooms for appearances but we only sleep in the one. She'll probably be back late, but she'll be back. Then I'll feel better.

>>8030637
>>8030771
>>8030808
Stop replying to him wtf is your problem

>>8030778
I've seen things.

>>8030895
you're pathetic, dude

When was the last time you saw a girl and your reaction was "Fucking take me right here right now"

>>8030910
Confirmed for being a male.

>>8030917
My gf. Yesterday.

>>8030078
quick it's april fools play it off as a joke now while you have time

>>8030091
>>8030091
bislut with a baby?

bounce

>>8031021
Fucking clutch

>>8030252
sure idgaf but it usually ends up drama

>making out with random drunk straight girl that started it
>k cool this is fun stuff
>some guy comes on all pissed at her
>her: OMGEE CHILL WE'RE STRAIGHT JUST PLAYING GOHD
>me: I'm gay actually but no biggie
>now she's pissed at me and her and boy are arguing
>walk away

life

>>8030598
no one is saying you gotta take dick

your options are dick or vag w/ cum. there's a good lesbian with loyalty out there for you but you'll never find her if you stick with trash and long term she's gonna pick the dude over you

>>8030928
Confirmed for being a queen.

>>8030747
Being a lesbian isn't even a real thing. Go find yourself a nice conservative guy and ditch these delusional straight women asap.

>>8030747
Grind and work and move the fuck out. Whatever shit state you're in there's gotta be some half way decent city with a decent population within a days drive from you. Make that city you're goal. It won't fix all you're problems but it'll give you some focus besides wasting time on futureless relationships. Hell find an ld online near that town and maybe you find another lonely bitch and you can help support each other into making it out of small town hell.

>>8031069
That's what I've been called. Queen of the lesbians. Isn't it depressing when you look in the mirror and remind yourself that you're an ugly male and your fantasies will never come true?

>>8030210
I think so. I had sex with my gf and she went to sleep.

Also, I got all the groceries on her list. I got the ones she forgot to put on the list. The list was not necessary.

>>8031159
Queen of denial, you mean.

>>8031178
>denial
What did he mean by this?

Is anyone actually a lesbian here or is it just dudes and trannies pretending to be lesbian.

My gf was actually talking about a show she went to with a friend on Friday, and told me she saw what was the most beautiful (unconfirmed) lesbian she has ever seen.

She was 6'1 with a grey/black T-shirt cut into a tank top and solid flannel. Her shoulders were so toned that she noticed from across the room. Dark jeans that showed she had quads like a cyclist or something, and was super aloof and just queer looking with a short dark hair cut. Supposedly she wouldn't have been my type, but I have made peace with us having different types a long time ago.

>>8031298
Not a single woman here, mate. Gay men are way too jealous of cis women, the environment is way too hostile. Look how they treated that girl earlier.

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How much of a cop-out is Tinder? All my friends, who are all straight girls, incidently, seem to agree that it destroys romance and is wrong and unnatural. I want to agree because I'm old fashioned but as an ugly and completely socially inept lesbian I have really limited options for dating and I'm really lonely.

Is it worth destroying the meaning of romance to try it out?

>>8031618
Look kiddo,

Romance is dead. It's only reserved to those with good self-esteem, education, status and etc. Average lesbian is only barely better than average man when it comes to romance. Sure, she is way more gentle and understanding, but my point remains.

>>8031618
Don't listen to the male. People use things like Tinder when it's harder for them to meet people. That's all there is to it. There are better platforms but I suppose the more popular the medium, the better chance you have of finding a girl you click with. Just remember that you should get your priorities in order, have your standards to stick by - and that you'd probably find a more suitable girlfriend irl than through an app because things like dating profiles are so flawed. Combine that with the fact the attractive and well-adjusted lesbians are already taken.

>>8031618

Straight people are fuckin stupid and there's nothing wrong with meeting over an app. If there's no romance it's because they're stupid bitches. Romance doesn't just happen, you have to make it happen. Talk her up on tinder and then take her out for a nice actual real life date.

t. passing gay dude who met his bf on grindr

>>8031618
straight tinder, lesbian tinder, and gayman tinder are all different beasts that can't be compared

try that shit out and decide for yourself.

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I met my Girlfriend on OK cupid. We were like a 73% match. However, in real life we are almost perfect for each other while still having a contrast. No one wants to date their mirror image.

Prior to using the site, I had gone out countless nights alone, wasted who knows how many dollars, hoping to just "bump into" the woman of my dreams.

*Spoiler* Didn't fucking happen.

The facts are most of the people using this site have introverted aspects about them. The odds of two introverts meeting in an meaningful way in the wild are slim to none. You might as well be buying lotto tickets.

The app bridges the gap and puts them into your consideration/viewfinder in cases when otherwise they wouldn't be. Girls especially don't often go out alone. When they do they are really on guard to anyone new. If they are out with friends they are extra resistant to someone outside the group just joining in.

tl;dr in today's world your shooting yourself in the foot if you aren't using a dating app or site.

>>8031618
>>8031795
I straight up met my girlfriend on a shitty korean mmo with shitty p2p hosting.

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If I went to Europe, and ended up near you somehow, would anyone let me know what another girl's tiddies and stuff feels like?

I just realized I have four full-sized bottles of mouthwash in my bathroom right now.

Given, one of them only has one use left BUT IT'S GOOD MOUTHWASH. So I'm saving it.

>>8032213
Uhg, you remind me of my mom. There's no special occasion to be saving that for.

>>8032213
are you a hoarder?
how messy is your room, right now?

>go on lesbian subreddit one time to see what it's like
>top post is someone talking about how when their parents figure out they are transgender and a lesbian its going to be tough for them
>other posts about transitioning
>realize over half the sub is transbians and their tumblr enablers
>leave

I have no problem with transwomen but why do they act like they're a legitimate lesbian before they even transition?

>>8032231
Pretty messy ngl. Got a few piles of clean clothes.

I don't think I'm a hoarder, I just try to get the most out of what I have

>>8032225
Kek

>>8032213
Fucking use it nigger.

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will I be accused of being straight if I don't want to do [spoiler]analingus[/spoiler]?

>>8032194
You want to molest my boobs, anon? What part of euro?

>>8032232
Wouldn't it be worse/prove they aren't real, if they *didn't* act like lesbians even prior to transition? Just saying.

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>>8030005
>I dislike an entire race for being racists like me.

Fooling around didn't happen... :( Further updates tomorrow.

>>8029959
>expressing a racial preference is racism

Oh, fuck right off.

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Been playing the sono hanabira series and one thing that annoys me so much about the games is
>dominant female remains dominant and ball of perfection
>submissive female is a fucking clutz that can't do anything right
I just hate these archetypes desu and wish they added more personality and romance...
Thinking of dropping the games and moving on to kindred spirits on the roof
Also why do I keep having dreams centered around lesbianism and video games?
It's starting to really annoy me because I always get rejected in them and resort to playing vidya so I can cope with the embarrassment

>tfw no dom gf

;-;

>>8032720
>girl who wants to dom every single night and doesn't get tired of it

Kek good luck with that.

Stuttering femmes are cute and they should be treasured

>>8032756
Don't ruin my dreams, a-anon...

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/clg/, how do you feel about closeted people? Would you date a girl who is closeted?

>>8032781
My girlfriend is closeted ftm.

>>8032781
I'm okay with it. We can do naughty things in my apartment, then she can pretend we are just friends in public. The sneakiness is kind of hot.

>>8032781
I'd prefer it. I'm closeted to my family, so it's good to know she won't pressure me about that.

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>Hey there anon, come sit next to me and have a beer

>>8033157
She's quite masculine

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>>8033163
>come take a jog with me, anony

>>8033163
About as masculine as a cheerleader.

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>>8033172
Is this masculine enough for you?

>>8033171
Is that the Potomac walking trail outside of dc? Sure looks like it. Cool

>>8032667
Which nickname anon are you?

>>8033180
Sure. I want her to hug me like a big fuzzy Siberian bear.

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>>8032194
If you want to get laid, go to Michigan and fug michigananon. She'll all alone up there with no gf. Plus she's a qt and always horny.

>>8032232
It's reddit, what did you really expect.
Stay here where it's safe.

>>8029764
>Cis Lesbian General (/clg/): Die Juden Edition
?

>>8033180
If she was born in '99 so help me...

>>8033330
I'm also gay and from michigan. Who is this other michigan anon. Let's smash.

>>8032232
Same here. I know it’s reddit, so perhaps I shouldn’t be surprised, but it was still unexpectedly cancerous:
>transbians, transbians everywhere
>“I identify as lesbian although I fuck men occasionally, but it doesn’t really count because I’m not really attracted to them on an emotional level”, “I’m gay but my bf is the only exception xD”
>polyamorous genderqueer aromantic tumblrinas with xyr/xem/xemselves pronouns
Never again desu.

>>8033401
How do you not know who Michigananon is? You haven't been on here in the past 2 weeks, huh?

>>8033409
Since when did tumblr become reddit

>>8033409
Not to mention transbians will come out to attack anyone who dares voice that they're not personally interested in dating a transwoman. They won't even accept those who won't date pre-op, they literally want to force lesbians into liking dick.

>>8033586
I can't even imagine the mental gymnastics necessary for that train of thought.

>>8033409
Reminds me of someone who used to be in my friendgroup. This 'lesbian' has been known to fuck and make out with guys. I think she had a pregnancy scare once.

On top of that, she's change her identity every other week from lesbian to bi. She'd go out of her way to announce these changes (for example, she was mad when she couldn't enter her name as 'the bisexual' in Smash WiiU because it was too long).

>>8033620
Well I mean bishit would be short enough

Are you sexually frustrated?

>>8033736
I'm frustrated in general, but yes.

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>>8032411
A-and other parts maybe. Western euro

>>8033330
fug, not going to the US anytime soon

>>8033736
Somewhat I guess. But I'm missing the intimacy of sex way more than the pleasure aspect.

>>8029827
>tfw Men have a dick and you can't compete.

>>8033735
That's true.

She's the SJW type too. My fiance was sitting at her computer, pretending to listen to her game once when her roommate invited bishit over.

The eavesdropping ended when bishit was explaining to the roommate that, "I know I can't fully understand [black friend] because I'm white."

Fiance burst out laughing and that was that.

>>8029959
Because racism is the truth. It will be present in any honest community. Kinda like asking why so many lesbians believe the sky is blue.

>>8033801
http://www.slate.com/blogs/xx_factor/2017/02/24/a_survey_found_that_lesbians_give_women_way_more_orgasms_than_men_wonder.html

>>8033339
oy vey >>8033401

>>8029764
>tfw passing post-op transbian
Either most cis girls just don't even suspect,
or every girl I've been fucked by is naive as fuck

Feels good ^_^

0/10 He didn't even bait the hook.

>>8033810
Sjws are cancerous as fuck. If she spouts any of that bullshit about blm and Matts, then she's crazy no exceptions.

>>8033393
Was she?

>>8033860
I'm so not surprised by this.

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post things that you hate about porn/pornografic materal

hot lesbian action
>is actually a bi three some

>>8033943
Over exaggerated fake moaning. It's a big turn off for me

>>8033943
Exaggerated moaning
Fake orgasms
Long fingernails

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>>8031727
>Look kiddo,
dropped
>>8031745
>>8031748
>>8031771
>>8032019
>>8031795
y'all are nice and I'm gonna try it because I don't have anything to lose. Just gotta find selfies I'm ok with first...

Nobody loves you.

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>>8034002
I'm fairly certain that my sister loves me.

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Post your love at first sight

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>>8033943
anything that was clearly shot on a porn set is the worst, everything about it is awful

>>8033952
i love that desu

>>8034064
I don't have a picture of Austrianon saved

>>8034064
>Implying I'm not 3dpd-tier garbage now

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>>8034064

are a-cup girls doomed or do I have a chance at finding a gf one day?

>>8034475
be willing to be ruthlessly teased

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>>8033188
haha
>>8032667
So what ended up happening was more surprising than I thought. We had planned to try making out to ease back into things in the evening. Instead we made two Sheppard's pies, and cleaned the apartment, then literally Netflix and chill. (no making or or anything) Finished the wine, and ended up setting off the fire alarm and freaked out trying to get that to stop. (Didn't burn anything but there was too much gravy in one of the Sheppard's pies and it slipped over and started burning on the bottom of the oven)

Eventually she looks to me while cuddling and says "I know I promised to try fooling around tonight but I don't think it will work today, can we reschedule for tomorrow or something?" I told her she didn't have to. I didn't want her doing it just because she felt pressure to a commitment she made before. (I wanted her to do it because she wanted to) Then resigned myself that it was likely never going to happen/keep getting pushed off. We watched some more of the show, then went to bed. I was still snuggling up next to her and kept getting my hair caught in these new gel earplugs she had while nuzzling her neck.

Then it happened. She rolled over and looked at me and asked, "Do you want to try some stuff now?" (So happy!) She started fondling my breasts and sucking on my nipples. She would trace her finger nail up and down my inner thigh teasing me, then alternate back to the nipples and touched them as lightly as possible. (Needless to say I was totally squirming at this point) Then when she is satisfied I can't take it anymore started fingering me deep, and some how managed to keep her finger near my clit.
Sploosh.

Out of characters. Part Two inc.

>>8034475
bralette girl! >>8026515

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>>8034578
Part two:
She want me to get on top of her and try tribbing. It was going less good, but still felt great. My hair is pretty long and kept getting in her face. She was holding both my breasts as I was on top. Eventually choking on my hair was too much so got me to switch to grinding on her thigh, and gathered my hair up behind my head like a pony tail. Still going at it she starts pulling on my hair as I ride down on her, my breast in her other hand and wiggling her hips. The hair pulling totally got me, lost it again. (Sploosh x2)

After that she asks if I will cuddle her while she plays with herself. (More boring I know, but this is the part we are working on.) So I press up as close as I can and give her little neck kisses and fondle her breasts while she goes at it.

While I wish I could have had a more active role with her, I still consider the night a huge surprise success! Whew!

There you have it ladies. ;) (Six sexless months later)

>>8034475
Ps I am a 32A, and obviously have a gf. There is hope, and along with insecurity. I still dream for a late spurt or something. Mom is pretty well off there and said hers didn't really take off till she got older.
>tfw your little sister has bigger breasts than you...

>>8034626
>tfw your little sister has bigger breasts than you...
How?

>>8034675
kids maybe?

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>>8034226
so much this

>>8034593
Why would you opt for a Bralette over a fitting A cup bra though?

Like even the name is sort of a put-down. "Your breasts aren't big enough for a real bra so have this special bralette."

She just does. We are both thin. But she is like 5'4, while I am 5'10. She is somewhere between a B and a C, and I am stuck with A's.

She is 24. I actually posted a picture of her here once.

>>8034698
So be a surrogate for some gay couple.

>>8034675
Pretty sure cup size isn't determined by age alone, anon........

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>>8034064

>>8034888
It isn't. I didn't mean to imply that it was. Just that the good genes ought to go to the first born! haha

It's kinda like when the younger sibling is taller/bigger than the older sibling, so everyone thinks they are the older one just cause, "Older= Bigger". Flawed logic, but it happens a lot.

>>8034593
>tfw a-cup
>tfw the only thing that gives me shape in that area is the bra booby cups

Bralettes = no.

>>8034475
A-cups are totally fine with me. Small boobs are super cute. As long they're big enough to need a bra, you should be alright.

>>8034950
I doubt that happens with opposite sex siblings.

>>8034626
hot.

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>tfw thighs on the thicker side
>tfw half the time you like it and the rest of the time you think it's gross

>>8035336
Are they flabby or fit, anon?
This is the deciding factor.

>>8034593
wtf how'd you know?

>>8034507
in a sexy way?

>>8034779
theyre more comfy and just work better with small boobs, idk anon idk.

>>8034626
I am also 32A, so I'll hold onto hope my friend

>>8034963
>a cups
>big enough to need a bra
excuse me?

>>8035451
Medium, I guess. I've been doing squats but I'm not that strong yet. Everything is pretty firm but the inner thigh. A friend tried to bounce a quarter off my ass and it worked.

>>8035495
>theyre more comfy
how so? this makes me feel small tits would be the most pleasant to have.

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Today is Autism Awareness day.
Post your autismo stories.

A few months ago:
>been tutoring a qt grill from school who has been struggling with exams
>spend several evenings per week throughout the semester studying in the library together
>do my best to help her understand the subjects, but despise my efforts she ends up failing out of the program
>tells me that it’s all her fail and was grateful that I was willing to help her
>offers to take me out to dinner as a way of showing her appreciation
>while at dinner she tells me she is moving to another state to go live with her sister and try going to school there
>as I drive her back to her apartment, she leans over and kisses me
>tells me that she is going to miss me when she is gone
>ask me if I want to hang out in her apartment
>”nah, I have to go workout and go to bed”
>she looks at me with a wtf face
>tell her to have a goodnight, she gets out, and I drive away
>as I drive home I realize what just happened
>tfw I could of gotten laid that night

This one happened earlier this week:
>doing paperwork at work
>accidentally knock down my stapler from my desk
>stapler breaks beyond repair
>decide to go ask the new qt they just hired at the front desk if she will let me borrow her stapler for the day
>she tells me that she will let me borrow her stapler if I agree to go to lunch with her that day
>”Hahaha. I don’t eat lunch. Hahaha”
>she looks at me for a few secs, smiles and hands me her stapler
>as I walk back to my workstation I realize I might have come off as rude
>as I work I realize I just decline a lunch date with a qt
>tfw

And this is why I'm still a 24 (soon to be 25) year old virgin.

> went to church today
> super pretty, 6' tall cousin is there with her fiancee
> talk to her, meet him, tell them I'll for sure be at their wedding in July
> she asks if I have a bf
>"haha no not right now"
>"that's ok, you'll find someone :)"
> proceed to stare at her ass throughout service
Why am I such human garbage?

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>>8035668
You IDIOT, anon. You idiot. Ask her out to lunch, tell her you didn't get a chance to eat breakfast and if her offer is still up or something, I don't care how you do it, fix it.

>>8035668
Jesus. Are you actually on the spectrum?

>>8035668
How old was the girl you tutored? Why were you at school at 24?

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>>8035668
>never get hit on by qt's because I'm ugly and never leave my house

That's a real autismo story for you, you damn normie.

>>8035668
Jesus Christ that made me physically twitch.
That being said I once got asked by a date to come up to her apartment for coffee and I literally said "Haha no thanks, I don't drink coffee that late, good night" and went home.
And nearly swerved into oncoming traffic when I realized 10 minutes later. Fuck.

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>>8035716
Apparently so.

This one happened a few weeks ago:
>take the train to and from work
>one day, notice a qt staring at me
>I look at her and she smiles
>get super nervous
>whip out my phone and start playing a game
>occasionally look up at her
>every time I look at her, she smiles
>don't know what to do, so I do nothing
>train stops at a station
>as qt walks out, I look up
>she smiles and winks at me
>I still do nothing

Kill me, senpai.

>>8035786
Grad school, bby. She was 23.

>>8032720
>>8032756
I am that! But I have too many other dealbreakers for /clg/ to romanticize me.

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>>8035668

Vaginal cyst anon from a little while back. It has grown larger and more painful and looks like it will rupture soon. I'll be calling my doctor tomorrow to see if she thinks I should go to her to get it checked out.

Currently icing my vagina. This hasn't been the most fun of days.

>>8035894
Breakfast = just had sex

>>8035668
Wow that is a colossal fuck up if I do say so myself.

>>8035920
You should really try and pop it. (squeeze like a pimple)

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>>8035975
>squeeze like a pimple
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6aSWoXNMq5M

>>8033801
>boasting about a small protrusion of flesh connected to the most sensitive part of your body which is the target of attack when that dick starts doing your thinking

>>8035668
I actually want to kill you, just strangle you with my bare hands.

>>8035975
First of all, it hurts so bad the thought of trying to pop it sounds like hell. Secondly, that can push some of it further into the epidermis, causing more problems later on. Fuck that.

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>>8035949
how have i never figured that out before? stupid dense autistic me. thanks, have a photo of brit

>>8035920
Every time I read stuff like this I thank whatever gods may be for my healthy vagina. I don't even know how but I never had even the slightest problems, not even fucking razor burn.

>>8036118
Don't care? They can wear whatever they like.

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>>8035668
>>8035795
>>8035805
KEK. What is wrong with you anons?

>>8036170
Severe autismo

Kristen Stewart's boobs from her new movie:
https://webmshare.com/wn4bR

So if you want to get with an autistic girl too pretty much need to say "wanna come back to my apartment and finger me a little?"

Isn't there some more practical way?

>>8036458
> won't play on my phone
;_;

>>8036471
Flash her maybe?

>>8036485
I said more practical.

>>8036458
Look surprisingly nice

>>8036471
That's probably the most surefire way, yes.
But you can test it on me if you like.

>>8036471
>being open about what you want
>impractical

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>>8036471
Well, it would help. Yes.

Ugh. In the waiting room for my first papsmear, lesgen. So nervous :/

>>8036522
Make sure the doctor is a woman, otherwise you're no longer a gold star. But for real, you'll be fine. There's nothing to it.

>>8036522
It's ok to feel nervous, even though there's nothing to be nervous about.

>>8035571
because bralettes dont typically have any wire, so you don't have anything hard digging into your skin.

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>>8035668
>>8035795
>>8035805
You guys are making me angry. Like actually. I don't even get noticed by girls and am too insecure to approach a cute one, and here you guys are, squandering opportunities.

>>8035697
>going to church

>>8036558
> being a heathen

>>8035697
I went to church today too, and got a huge nosebleed the second I walked in. Poor old lady nearly fainted, lol.

>>8036522
Tell me if it hurts.
It friggin hurts me when I get it done.

>>8036595
Rip

>>8036610
>It friggin hurts me when I get it done.
Were you a virgin?

Googled image searched bralettes. Holy shit some of those are sexy, and I swear a couple of those women are giving me the "come hither" eyes.

>>8036552
Also mad. How attractive are you that all these women are openly hitting on you? I can't even begin to imagine a world like that.

>>8036677
I'm not really all that attractive, I just clicked with that girl. Only time it's ever worked, honestly. If nearly killing myself in traffic counts as "worked" anyway.

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>>8036677
>Also mad. How attractive are you that all these women are openly hitting on you? I can't even begin to imagine a world like that.
I say I'm average at best.
>5'8
>/fit/ish (mostly do cardio)
>decent facial features
>okay fashion sense
However
>severally socially inept
>struggle to keep conversations going
>don't realize things are happening until it's too late

>>8036552
>attractive people are idiots
What's new?

>>8036533
She was. She's a qt with an irish accent

>>8036541
Ty anon. It wasn't too bad.

>>8036610
Honestly yeah it did hurt a little. I'm really tight down there so anything inserted generally hurts.

>>8036774
>tfw no qt Irish woman who puts their hands on/in you
Why live

>>8036728
>tfw no apu gf

I HAVE A PENIS AND IM HERE AND I WONT LEAVE.

Penis penis penis

>>8036865
So do half of us but we keep our mouths shut about it until we're post-op. How about doing the same?

>>8036873

Oh I'm not even a transbian. HAH!

PENIS

>>8036865
Let me turn you into a sissy faggot

*flashes penisu*

>>8036881
Then why are you here?

>>8036865
Everyone here has a penis so we don't really care. You're not special.

>>8036938
I know but I can't help but take pity on the mentally retarded and throw them a (You) once in a while.

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>>8036938
What trolls? Filters are a wonderful thing.

>>8036677
Just started hearing about these bralettes, now they're everywhere. What makes it so special?

>>8036595
You don't belong with them. You belong in our religion - we worship a replica of Scarlett Johanson's ass.

>>8037004
>worship the woman who's ruining GitS
Yeah no

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>>8037004
>Scarlett Johanson's ass.

Speaking of which. Any of you go see the new Ghost in the Shell? Promises to be plenty of Scarjo booty shoots.

Tits, out, for the girls
tits out for the girls

>>8037078
You first

>>8037004
When did you start hearing about them prior to this thread?

>>8036668
Yes.
Still am. ;-;
I've had 2 or 3 and they all hurt.

For any transbians that post or lurk here. Even if you're post op why would you want to be around a bunch of women that hate you? Why not stick with other translesbians, bi girls, or lesbians that don't hate you?

I don't really care if you're here but I don't understand why you would want to be here.

>>8037230
>a bunch of women that hate you
>I don't really care if you're here

>>8037105
Here and there. It's like when you buy a new car and then you notice your car everywhere. I heard the word and then I started hearing it everywhere.

>>8037057
I wish I could see it but I have no friends.

>>8037022
>being mad at that body
Found the straightie

>>8037230
I have heard a lot of them say in other threads bashing lesgen, (not /clg/ oddly enough) that the reason they come here is basically self loathing. They "don't want to hang out with other transwomen." Which is pretty funny. They basically hate their own kind and themselves. They come here instead to be surrounded by "real women" however the more of them that adopt this philosophy the fewer "real women" they are actually hanging out with.

It is a really weird situation if you ask me.

>>8037397
>I wish I could see it but I have no friends.
This is bullshit. Just go by yourself. It isn't that big of a deal. I never understood why people were like this. I went to stuff solo when I was single all the time. Never bothered me. Definitely a better time than staying home alone, and missing out on whatever the event is.

My gf and I planned on going this weekend but other stuff came up. Still happy with how the weekend played out! (Still have a bit of Sunday night left too!)

>>8037397
Stereotypically shallow woman, no interest in a quality original story, only the bastardization Hollywood puts out.

>>8037435
>They basically hate their own kind and themselves.
can you blame us?

> headache
> lightheaded
> feeling weak
> chills
> no gf
Hold me, /clg/

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Ok here goes
>be 9/10 lesbian, tomboy-ish
>confident, decent amount of friends
>hidden autism
>go on tinder dates with hot girls
>no idea how to initiate sexual contact
>freeze up if girl touches me
>can only have casual conversations, treat them like work collegue I have just met
>scared of eye contact
>everyone thinks I get laid all the time because hot
>somehow makes it worse
>terrified of being bad in bed
>still virgin
>thinking of giving up and becoming obese so have an excuse
>meet obese lesbian with gf

Should I just end it now

>>8037615
Just get laid. You'll only get better with practice, and I'd definitely be willing to show a butch qt the ropes.

>>8037615
go to a gay strip club

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>>8037560
You should grow a spine. I don't care what or who you are, you should have some self-respect. If you want to live out the rest of your days being a beta male cuck in a dress "coool bro"

However, if you want to be even a close approximation of what a woman is stand up, and stop calling yourself shit even if you are. (Goes for any of you self depreciating ladies lurking in here being NEETs too! OP has decreed you will become slaves, but if I end up owning you I will make you stand up straight! KS in pic related.)

I don't fucking know why I bother. I just hate seeing people reduce themselves to worms, when they are likely decent people. ack!

>>8037615
You sound like the Candy character in this but a tomboy:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=UIR9Z_JdVhs

>>8037648
This is easier said than done. Once I brought a girl up to my bedroom after drinks and played cod with her without making eye contact until she got bored and left. I honestly don't know why I do these things.

>>8037660
lol

If I was born with a vagina, and I an a lesbian, but I sort of identify as nonbinary, am I still a cisles?

>>8037732
Yeah, you're just dumb

>>8037732
Yes just don't announce your snowflake gender to other gals right off the bat and your set. Get them to like you first.

>>8037724
>I brought a girl up to my bedroom after drinks and played cod with her without making eye contact until she got bored and left.
>COD
>Playing games instead of playing with her.
I would have left much sooner.

>>8037615
Cute. Hopefully you meet a girl who is patient and understanding. You also need to be willing to push your boundaries a little, you don't have to push it to the limit right away, but you gotta grit your teeth sometimes if you wanna start on the path to happy sex life.

>>8037615
Are you submissive? Can I tease doing sexual things to you and work you up and have you constantly nervous and on your toes around me? That's like, my ultimate fetish.

>>8037615
Even as an uggo - you still have a better chance than this chick.

>>8037682
>you should have some self-respect.
i do it's just very very little. i think i'm a decent person and i do respect myself for that. but that doesn't make up for all my flaws like having nearly no spine and i can't respect myself more when i have them.

>a beta male cuck in a dress
i'm not a beta cuck. a beta at least tries. a cuck doesn't know he's pathetic.

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>>8037724
>played cod
>cod

I don't blame her. You have shitty taste in vidyas, you filthy casual.

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What's your hair color?

>>8037615
>be 9/10 lesbian, tomboy-ish
Post pic. I've never seen a 9/10 tomboy.

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>>8037842
This. Pictures are needed.

>>8037831
Basically this, some kind of faded strawberry blonde that used to be more red. . . I really wish red hair dye didn't fade so fucking fast. I just want to be a real red head.

shit lighting too

>>8037831
Black. Asian. My genes fuck up from time to time and I get white or auburn hairs.

>>8037842
Am I getting the tomboy definition wrong? I have very long hair but a fairly masculine style. I don't like shapeless men's clothes because I have a decent ass and abs. Men's jackets are cool tho. I have seen pretty hot girls like me.
Tempted to post pic but am most proud of my face which I dont rly want to post on 4chan

>>8038023
You sound like a narcissist.
Just post the pic.

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>>8037989
>another black asian
Holy shit dude, me too. Whenever my mom sees me and notices I have a white hair she does this faux dramatic gasping and pulls it out and shows it to me. What kind of Asian are you mixed with?

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>>8038023
omg post abs then

>>8038052
Not black and asian, I have black hair because I'm asian. Blasian girls are an interesting concept. I am however a mixed asian. Corean + china

>>8038036
Would rather be an average looking girl who gets laid than me desu. Looks are all I have and I can't do anything with them.
Anyway mainly came here for help. How do you act differently on dates than if you were talking to an average stranger? I try and look for advice online but it's always for straight people . Do you normally offer to pay for food etc.? Never know what to do with that.

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>>8038064
>refuses to post pic to establish that you truly are a 9/10 mystical good looking tomboy

You don't need to lie to us about your appearance, anon.

>>8038057
My bad, I've been reading and squinting at the same sentences for 5 hours now and forgot what the context was even about. And yeah, I'm a mythical creature. Being Korean and Chinese, do you speak either language? Which one do you identify with more?

>>8038103
You can think I am secretly ugly, it doesn't really make a difference. I just wanted a place to vent and get advice. What I need to know is how to stop sperging out on dates.
Are tomboys notoriously unattractive? I don't have any lesbian friends sadly so I don't really get the meme.

>>8038023
Post a headless pic. Sall good. Just fucking post something you tease!

>>8038112
I identify more with the korean side since both of my parents are from South Korea - my dad is just ethnically chinese and can speak both. English is my first language, I have a hard time learning languages but I know some korean and virtually no mandarin. I'd like to learn when I get some time.

>>8038140
You are a self proclaimed 9/10 tomboy. 9/10s of any sorts are uncommon, especially here. Prove is needed to know for sure that you are who you say you are since we rarely, if ever, encounter your type around here.
You seem to hold yourself at such a high standard, I don't see why you are having an issue of posting a pic so we can all admire your 9/10 self.

>>8038183
If I post a pic can someone actually give some fucking advice
God I need irl lesbian friends

>>8038209
Do it.

>>8037915
>tfw no qt strawberry blonde hair gf

What is your natural hair color?

>>8038209
Timestamp dat shit baby - lest you want someone posing as you all over the internet.

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Anon, come on. Post pic. We are waiting.
It's late. Some of us have to get up for work in the a.m.

How would you know it was me? do i have to hold something up? Have never done this before my life has never sank this low

>>8038314
>newfag anon confirm

Babe, you truly are autistic. RIP.
Hold up a sheet of paper that has today's date and time. Also write /clg/.

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Today in adventures of having an awesome gf who I love. She bought me a pair of "boyfriend Jeans" and looser dress pants for my future job interviews. (The jeans were because I told her I wanted to look more gay, and she is determined because I basically look like a femme/lazy straight girl most of the time. She actually was given a 10 dollar coupon for old navy because the cashiers were talking about our car in the lot, and then she piped up, "that is my girlfriends car!" (I have it decked out in pokemon go stuff and a giant poke-ball on the hood/teams emblems on the side. Also a long story haha)

Then she made us an an amazing steak and salad with mushrooms and onions in this fancy thai BBQ type sauce.

So I went and got us two more bottles of wine after learning that I am getting paid out for my vacation time from my old job which is an extra 1000 bucks!

She also made a huge mess in the kitchen re-potting some of our house plants but that is another story.

>>8038262
Naturally it is a dark chestnut brown.

>>8038209
Just post a picture of you, and then hold a piece of paper that says "Advice Plz /clg/ 4/2/2017" (not lined paper either you pleb)

I will legit give you advice. In abundance.

>>8038389
Sounds like a great day, haha-anon. I'm jelly of your relationship with your adorable gf.

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>be me, 21
>still can't get over a girl I had a little fling with almost two years ago
>we didn't even officially date or have real sex

send help
every time I hit on another girl all I think of is her face when she's smiling and her body when she's dancing
we don't even hang out anymore
tell me what to do cislesgen so that I may smooch ladies without her damn face in my head all the time

>>8038425
Find a girl with a prettier face than hers.

>>8038417
I am rooting for you anon! I don't want to be the only one!

Since this thread is close to expiry I will wait till tomorrow buuut, If anyone is interested I can post the workout routine she made for us too! (/clg/ can get fit together!) :D

I forgot to mention as well. Since we going to be so broke in short order, we have been taking up all these odd jobs. Today we heard back from an older woman who lives like two blocks away, and was looking for a cat sitter. She wanted somone within walking distance in case her cat has "an emergency" so she is going to let us do it haha! I am beyond excited, and that is why I posted a cat picture. (Although, I doubt the cat we are going to look after will be anything near as cool as the pic above)

>>8038389
>gf who I love

Sorry, "whom" alcohol and such.

>>8038441
Post the routine tomorrow. Senpai will probably make a new thread later on.

>cat sitter
Cute. A cousin of mine paid me to dog sit her 3 dogs last summer. Don't get me wrong, I love dogs but it was a lot of work. Required too much going outside and running around. Cats seem better. At least you don't need to take them for an hour long walk or clean up after their shit in the backyard.

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>>8038434
Very hard
I'm like, a 4/10 lesbian, and that's being generous with no real self esteem issues
She was a fucking adorable and heavily closeted angel
I think the only reason she had the thing for me is I was an open and out of the closet lesbian, and the only lgbt friend of hers

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Well, thread is going to die and self proclaimed 9/10 newfag is not going to deliver pic.

haha-anon, if she does post the pic, screenshot that shit for me. I have to get to bed; got work in a few hours. Thanks, bby.

>the girl i love is my best friend
>she's not into me and i know it well
>i can't get into a relationship with someone else without projecting her over my partner
>i lost all chances of confessing to her because she moved out recently and ldr doesn't work
What do i do

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>>8038553
Will do. I'm staying up for a bit to work on some new artwork for you all. Might as well use my funemployment powers for the greater good and save for you! Goodnight, have a good day at work anon!

>>8038556
>What do i do
Your being silly here. Think about the things you actually did together. You memory is being selective and only highlighting the good moments. She is still a fallible human. She is not special either, you can and will find someone just as amazing if you make it you core focus. You have to want it, and you have to be lucky.

When I was younger there was this girl Layla. I would have cut my heart out and handed it to her on a plate if it would make her happy. I know for a fact while she considered me her best friend for a while (we even dated) she would never do the same for me. Unrequited love is no love at all.

Sometimes the ideal is better than the reality. Like I think about drinking and idealize the whole experience a lot. It is never as good or what I imagined it would be. It falls short.

If you had this girl she would be falling short, you might find a way to be satisfied but you wouldn't be hitting the highs you're imagining right now. If you gave yourself the same credit your giving Mrs. X you would be walking down the street with hips swaying, and exuding as much fucking confidence as you could muster.

Your great, other women are fucking great. Give them the same chance and lens as your using for your vision of the past and you will surprise yourself.

I promise.

>tfw going to go shopping tomorrow

I want to make whole wheat pancakes from scratch, topped with slices of banana and a homemade blueberry sauce.

>>8038830
Sounds yummy. Show us a picture when you're done.

>>8038892
I definitely will. I love to cook. I want a gf who loves to eat what I make.

my crush sent me a <3 today guys

>>8037831
naturally red
aka best hair color

>tfw best hair but no gf

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>>8039013
d-do you have cute freckles as well?

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>>8039013
Post a picccc! Red heads are my life! (also so jelly)

>>8037615
>Calling yourself 9/10

wew

>>8038916
A girl sent me a heart emote once and I spent a good twenty minutes trying to decipher the meaning.

>>8039164
What was your conclusion?

>>8038389
>(I have it decked out in pokemon go stuff and a giant poke-ball on the hood/teams emblems on the side. Also a long story haha)

Post pic of your Pokemon car.
Or be excommunicated from the island.

>>8037801
Different anon here - I love being on the receiving end of this kind of thing, except I'm kinda dominant.

My new meds are seriously fucking with my head and libido, ugh.

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>>8029764
Hey girls, writer-anon here, getting in just before the thread dies.

Sorry if I've been really busy lately, but work is work. Here is the character sheet so far. I've missed the last few threads so if your character isn't here, just let me know and I'll add her. I'm hoping to start work on the first story soon, which will just be a long introduction to everyone on the island as seen from the perspective on a new arrival, mostly starring my own self-insert.

The character list can be found here: https://pastebin.com/8hLk9R2w

There are a few stories I've written for /tg/ on that account too, which I used to do a lot before full-time work took over my life.

Pic unrelated, I just think she's a qt.

>>8039449
Woo. We love you, writer-anon. I can't wait for the story.
In other news, the weather is pretty great so my sister and I were just lazing around in the garden and sunbathing/relaxing, she made margheritas and it was pretty comfy.
Then she had to scoot over on my lounger and get waaaay too close and, as usual, my face was burning up and she's just all "Relax, I won't bite" and it was all I could do to not blurt out "I wish you would".
Fuck.

>>8037615
my ex was obese and i'm p cute t b h. i think you're onto something.

Any good lesbian clubs or bars in Switzerland? I'm planning a trip and I want to go to a proper good lesbian club.

>>8039574
I'm not sure I'd call it an 'official' lesbian bar but the Barfüsser in Zurich has a long history of gay-friendly atmosphere and definitely a lot of homosexual clientele. Plus the sushi is pretty good.

>>8039589
Thanks! I'll visit it then.

>>8039687
When are you going, if you know? If you see a stick thin auburnish girl who looks like she hasn't slept in three days, say Hi and I'll buy you a drink.

>>8039712
I'm going to be there in the middle of May. Is it too far away? I'd love to say Hi and share a drink or two.

>>8039712
>>8039740
if you meet, you must fug
such are the rules

>>8039740
Well I'm in Zurich maybe two, three times a month for business but I usually only know a few days in advance when I'll go.

>>8039750
B-but anon I just wanted to have a drink, I can't cheat on Germanon.

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>>8039449
>blueberries
looks like someone has a thing for xeno girls

>>8039756
>I just wanted to have a drink,
you can't hide your hand-holding ways from me

>>8039768
You got me, I'm a total slut for handholding. Once I even held hands with two girls at once.

>>8037615
You sound cute af tbqh
I'd date you even if you're actually 5/10

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>>8039778
>I even held hands with two girls at once.

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>>8039762
Yeah, well it was written for a /tg/ audience. That series was supposed to bring in a load of alien and sci-fi girls but I didn't have the time to write it and didn't want to write too many long, non-lewd chapters. It's not illegal if they're non-human and fictional, anon. I don't live in one of those countries.

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>>8039798
I-I'm sorry for being so shamelessly lewd anon.

>>8039806
oh oh oh, random thought
>propaganda reports
start off with a pro-island "come see our freedumbs"
close out chapter with mainland report
"(X) missing women nears the coasts of 'the island,' officials deny piracy in waters" etc

throw a little dystopia in our utopia