I Just Want to Talk About my Lovelife

Hey, some of the post got cut off it seems. I'll rewrite it, or actually, just continue it.

Before she left, I was able to take her out. We went to see some films at the cinema, and I bought her dinner. I paid for everything. At the end of the day, I kept telling myself I needed to kiss her, like it was almost an obligation. I mean, we were great friends, we had been through alot, like Devon's encounter, really. I mean, it never happened. I was too considerate. I didn't want to impose. So, I let it go. Next day: she was gone.

When she was around, we talked about dating. She was in a long-distance relationship at the time. She was unpleased. She made it really clear, I mean, Emily HATES the guy now.

I feel like I've made alot of mistakes by being myself in relationships. Maybe I was because I tried my absolute hardest to show I cared, that I truely HAD love for the person.

I know this entire schpeel was unnecessary, but my real question is whether or not it's even worth it to have a sexuality anymore? And furthermore, is love even worth it?

Thanks for reading.

>>7890858
I don't know much about love, but from what little I do know, it sounds like you want someone who can commit to you.

The problem is, if you're in your teens, that's not really viable. At that age, most people are experimenting with relationships and sexuality, but they're not really mature/old enough to want to commit to spending the rest of their life with someone. That tends to happen in your twenties, thirties, even forties. The whole fantasy of marrying a "high-school sweetheart" rarely works out, and when it does, it's even rarer that it stays that way. That's because your time right now (and for a while into the future), will be best spent using the experiences you've had to learn about yourself, and others. What do you want out of a relationship? What do I like/dislike? What are my traits, and how do others find them attractive?

Sexuality is not the same thing as love. Sex is passionate, powerful, and fleeting. Love is, paradoxically, something that isn't rooted in romance, but in kinship and empathy for the human condition. It requires a lot of time, and a lot of work to truly develop, but ultimately, it'll show you you're not alone in this world. Finding someone that truly cares about you in that way is very rare, but don't let that discourage you, the more you learn about yourself and others, the easier it will become.

If you want to take a break from relationships, that's totally fine, but I wouldn't be so quick as to denounce them completely. We're social creatures, after all.